Magic School Bus
by Jeff
Image text: At my OLD school, we used Microsoft Encarta 2005.
This comic is a reference to the American TV cartoon and book series "The Magic School Bus". In this cartoon, Ms. Frizzle and her class would learn about a certain topic and then get in their school bus which would then fly, shrink down or grow so they could learn about the topic in real life. For example, when learning about anatomy, they would shrink down and go inside a person's body to see how the body actually works.
The image text is a reference to Microsoft Encarta which is an old electronic encyclopedia.
Permanence
by Jeff
Image text: This hostname is going in dozens of remote config files. Changing a kid's name is comparatively easy!
This one is self-explanatory. Cueball thinks it is easier to change a person's name than to change a hostname of a server because of the number of changes that would need to be made. However, it seems that Cueball has never had to wait in line at the Social Security Administration office or at the Department of Motor Vechicles. Those two name change processes make finding and changes dozens of hostfiles look like a piece of cake.
In the comic, Megan references "epidural" which is a process used during birth that blocks both pain and sensation, which Megan refers to as "drugs".
Worst-Case Shopping
by Jeff
Image text: Wait a minute. If I'm escaping from a submarine at 50 meters, then I'll *definitely* need a flashlight to find air pockets for gradual decompression on the way up. Time to start shopping professional dive lights.
In this comic, Cueball is dreaming up reasons he should get a flashlight that is water resistant up to 40 meters instead of 10 meters. (As an aside, I think the same things when I'm shopping for watches... why the heck would I need it to to be water resistant over 10 feet?)
In the dream sequence over the first 2 and a half frames, Cueball appears to be escaping from a submarine or ship or some crash and diving 8 meters to find a key. His flashlight goes out at 10 meters because he bought the "Hi-Brite" model. Also, for some reason, the dream sequence references a "radio shed", which were only really used in the past for ham radios. I'm not sure why Cueball's dream sequence involves going into the past where radio sheds would be more prevalent.
The image text takes Cueball's thought process to the next level, because if he is getting a flashlight that works to 40 meters, he should probably be prepared for even deeper waters as well.
Heaven
by Jeff
Image text: If you've never had sex, this is what it feels like. Complete with the brief feeling of satisfaction, followed by ennui, followed by getting bored and trying to make it happen again.
This comic is a reference to the video game Tetris, in which you use different shaped pieces to fill in lines to score points. The more lines you fill at a time results in more points.
In this comic, Heaven is when you get the perfect piece in Tetris that fills out all the empty space you have on the board.
In the image text, ennui means a feeling of utter weariness and discontent resulting from satiety or lack of interest.
I love Tetris.
UPDATE: As Mr. I and Phoenixx have pointed out in the comic, this is a direct opposite of the xkcd "Hell" Tetris comic.
Craigslist Apartments
by Jeff
Image text: $1600 / 1386153BR 3BATH, MODERN SLIDING DOORS, GUEST ROOMS, GARBAGE DISPOSAL. FREE MANDATORY PARKING (ENFORCED). CONVENIENT TO ALDERAAN.
Lots of details here, so I may not get everything, please let me know in the comments if there is a reference I missed.
First and foremost, just like all Craigslist apartment postings, all of these posts are in all caps and some of the posts are re-posted several times, which is very annoying, but must work otherwise the agents would not do it. Additionally, lots of posts use lots of tildas tildes, exclamation points or astericks as above to set their posts apart from others.
The square house door one must be a garage, I guess. EDIT - or just a regular square house. The house is square not the door. Don't know how I read it wrong. Thanks Commenters.
Hammock style dwelling sounds like working as a oarsman on a Viking ship.
The place with the Klein stairs is possibly a reference to Klein geometry.
The trimmed carpet is obviously a sex posting, because Craigslist has taken down the obvious prostitution posts after getting a lot of heat about them. So, this is a posting to get around those sort of rules. "Trimmed Carpet" - I think you can figure that one out. If you can't, I'll tell you when you are older.
The Minotaur house is a reference to the Labyrinth and Minotaur on Crete from ancient Greek mythology. EDIT - Commenters have pointed me to the House of Leaves book as this reference instead of ancient Greek Mythology. Thanks all!
The house with the 5 minute drive to historic Pripryat is a reference to the ghost town of Pripryat, which is near the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant in northern Ukraine. Not a nice place to live to say the least. EDIT - Commenters point out that this could be the nuclear facility itself... I think that makes sense.
The last one on the list does not seem to be a direct scary movie reference, but a horor movie reference in general.
And last, but of course not least, the image text is a reference to Star Wars. EDIT - I didn't complete my thought here, it is a reference to the Death Star in Star Wars. Alderaan is the home planet of Princess Leia, which is obliterated by the Death Star.
Are there any I missed? (Thanks for all your help in the comments. Head to the comments for further information and discussion about all the entries)
Significant
by Jeff
Image text: 'So, uh, we did the green study again and got no link. It was probably a--' 'RESEARCH CONFLICTED ON GREEN JELLY BEAN/ACNE LINK; MORE STUDY RECOMMENDED!'
In this comic, Megan and Cueball come to see some scientists to investigate their theory that jelly beans cause acne. The scientists of course do not want to stop playing the addictive game Minecraft (which has been referenced in previous xkcds). I can attest to the fact that it is impossible to stop playing that game.
When the scientists come back and say there is no link between jelly beans and acne, Megan and Cueball have heard that it is specific colors that cause acne. So, the scientists tear themselves away from Minecraft again and study each and every color (including mauve and turquoise - I didn't know those were real colors for jelly beans). Green is the only color that has any link. So, obviously the news blows the coverage out of control, even though as we see in the image text that the green jelly beans study may have been a coincidence.
But, of course, the news coverage in all caps in the image text blows it out of proportion again.
EDIT: Commenters Marco and Aron B. have the real joke in the comments, hit the link and check them out.
Server Attention Span
by Jeff
Image text: They have to keep the adjacent rack units empty. Otherwise, half the entries in their /var/log/syslog are just 'SERVER BELOW TRYING TO START CONVERSATION *AGAIN*.' and 'WISH THEY'D STOP GIVING HIM SO MUCH COFFEE IT SPLATTERS EVERYWHERE.'
Sorry for the late post on this, I was traveling yesterday. Good thing this comic is not very deep. If you are not familiar with this phenomenon, some sites with mobile versions redirect any link to the main site. Which, is one of the most annoying things in the world.
This comic attempts to explains this away that servers have short attention spans. As soon as they discover it is time to serve the mobile site, it forgets about the sending the proper link.
In the image text, the /var/log/syslog is a reference to the location that Linux Operating Systems keep the system logs.
Wisdom Teeth
by Jeff
Image text: I heard the general anesthesia drugs can cause amnesia, so when I woke up mid-extraction I started taking notes on my hand so I'd remember things later. I managed 'AWAKE BUT EVERYTHING OK' before the dental assistant managed to find and confiscate all my pens.
In this comic, Cueball decides it is finally time to play the game Minecraft (which is quite addicting) because he is getting his wisdom teeth out. Minecraft describes itself on its website as: "a game about placing blocks to build anything you can imagine. At night monsters come out, make sure to build a shelter before that happens." In the fourth frame, we see that instead of building anything, Cueball has flattened the continent out. I'm not sure what the block item in the lower right hand corner of the 4th frame is because I haven't played Minecraft. Anyone have any ideas?
Cueball makes a strange choice to flatten the continent because of all the painkiller drugs he is on after the wisdom teeth extraction. In the image text, because Cueball fears amnesia and memory loss from the anesthesia drugs, he writes information on his hand similar to the way the protagonist does in the movie Memento.
World According to Americans
by Jeff
Image text: It's not our fault we caught a group on their way home from a geography bee. And they taught us that Uzbekistan is one of the world's two doubly-landlocked countries!
Click the image to see the big version. This group of Americans is remarkably well informed. This is no "Jay Leno" man on the street ridiculousness.
Sorry for the very late post, but you did not need to much help on this one.
Mark
by Jeff
Image text: I'm a solipsistic conspiracy theorist. I'm sure I must be up to something, and I will not stop until I find out what.
So, the joke in this comic is that 20 years ago someone wrote or tatooed "PEN15" on his arm, which once you write it out like I did, it looks an awful lot like "PENIS". It's obvious that Cueball is not in a secret society and it was only random chance that he found that address and can of kerosene.
The word "solipsistic" in the image text means something that only exists in one's own mind. Which is basically defined with the rest of the image text, when solipsistic conspiracy theorist is defined.