Wrong Superhero
by Jeff
Image text: Hi! Someone call for me? I'm a superhero who specializes in the study of God's creation of Man in the Book of Genesi-- HOLY SHIT A GIANT BUG!
So, here we have the return of the super hero from just two comics ago, Etymology-Man. And just like that comic, Etymology-Man is explaining the origination of words instead of actually helping. For those of you who were not here on Monday, Etymology is the study of the history of words, their origins, and how their form and meaning have changed over time.
Who they want is Entomology-Man because they are fighting a giant praying mantis and an army of little praying mantises. (manti? I'm not sure.) But, honestly, those "little" praying mantises still look huge compared to the typical size of manti. Entomology is the study of insects. Considering Etymology-Man, I'm not sure Entomology-Man would fight the mantis or study it.
In the image text, we find out instead of getting Entomology-Man, they accidentally call a superhero of Etiology. (UPDATE: Some commenters are suggesting Adam-ology as well, which would make a lot of sense as well. Head to the comments for their reasoning) (I'm going to assume Etiology-Man, since the previous two superheroes have been male, but the image text gives me no reason to assume that.) Etiology is the study of causation, or origination. An etiological myth, or origin myth, is a myth intended to explain the origins of cult practices, natural phenomena, proper names and the like. Looking at that definition, it is no surprise that the Etiology superhero is over-matched with the giant praying mantis.
Etymology-Man
by Jeff
Image text: 'I can't believe I'm saying this, but I wish Aquaman were here instead--HE'D be able to help.'
This comic is a take on the traditional appearance of a super hero when a disaster strikes. In this case, Etymology-Man arrives, who apparently has the power of Etymology which is the study of the history of words, their origins, and how their form and meaning have changed over time. As Etymology-Man is explaining the history of the words tsunami and tidal wave while the water starts rising towards them.
Sustainable
by Jeff
Image text: Though 100 years is longer than a lot of our resources.
This is a graph of the usage of the word "Sustainable" in English in the United States each year. And as you can see, Randall extends the graph to the point where sustainable will be used as every word.
Sustainable has been increasing in use as people of the US are concerned about making sure that Earth's resources are not totally exhausted in the near future by developing sustainable development. Sustainable development (using wikipedia here) is a pattern of growth in which resource use aims to meet human needs while preserving the environment so that these needs can be met not only in the present, but also for generations to come.
As Randall mentions in the image text, the 100 years it takes for the word sustainable to get to 100% usage is a lot longer than most of our non-renewable (and non-sustainable) resources will last on the Earth.
I’m Sorry
by Jeff
Image text: You know I've always hated her.
Rarely does xkcd beat me to the explanation by providing it below the comic, however, in this case it does.
In the US, I don't know if this is the case in other countries, but when someone presents the other with bad news, they respond with (as the comic explains) a sympathetic "I'm Sorry". That is different than the "I'm Sorry" that a person would give for something that is their fault.
As it says below the comic, Cueball switches his sympathetic "I'm Sorry" when Megan does not accept the "I'm Sorry" because it was not his fault. This all starts to sound like an episode of the American sitcom Seinfeld.
Cueball says at the end "You know what I did..." and ""You know I've always hated her" as a wild switch to a fault "I'm Sorry".
Mimic Octopus
by Jeff
Image text: Even if the dictionaries are starting to give in, I refuse to accept 'octopi' as a word mainly because--I'm not making this up--there's a really satisfying climactic scene in the Orson Scott Card horror novel 'Lost Boys' which hinges on it being an incorrect pluralization.
Let's get this out of the way before it starts a flame war on here: according to Merrian Webster Dictionary online, both octopi, octopuses and octopodes (only if you are English) are all the correct plural of octopus. It is a pretty funny video, I highly recommend watching it, even if you don't care about the plural of octopus.
So, this comic is a reference to a typical fish and sea-life identification chart. Like this or the US airforce ID chart parody. So, its basically a parody of a parody referencing the mimic octopus which is, as the name implies, able to mimic other animals.
The Orson Scott Card novel 'Lost Boys' is (from Publisher's Weekly): "A withdrawn eight-year-old in a troubled family invents imaginary friends who bear the names of missing children in this absorbing thriller."
Strunk and White
by Jeff
Image text: The best thing about Strunk/White fanfiction is that it's virtually guaranteed to be well written.
This is a comic about the writing style guide called The Elements of Style by Cornell University professor William Strunk Jr. (I assume that's him with the pipe) and New Yorker writer E.B. White (who is at the computer). Just like in their book, they are clarifying the usage of words and phrases in the English language. In this case however, they are clarifying the use of their names, one for their book and another for the slash fiction or erotic fan fiction involving them.
Erotic fan fiction, if you were not aware is a genre of fiction in which fans make up erotic stories involving characters from non erotic stories.
I'm sure if there was not a Strunk/White slash fiction out before, there is one now.
Guest Week: Bill Amend (FoxTrot)
by Jeff
Image text: Guest comic by Bill Amend of FoxTrot, an inspiration to all us nerdy-physics-majors-turned-cartoonists, of which there are an oddly large number.
The top comic is a reference to this famous xkcd comic. The sudo command in linux allows a user to run as a "super-user", thus allowing them to execute the command they wish.
The next comic is a pun on the word "attractive". The girl thinks he is using it in the fashion that he likes he and is interested in her. He's using it in the gravitational pull way.
The next comic is a reference to the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. Which, if you read explain xkcd, you should know like the back of your hand.
The third comic, is a play on the sound of the word "aye". Aye is a word used when taking a verbal vote that is used to signify a positive, like yes. Additionally, aye sounds like the letter i. In this case, the mathematician in Congress is voting the square root of -1, which comes out to an imaginary number known as i. And since i sounds the same as "aye", that is how a mathematician votes.
Five-Minute Comics: Part 2
by Jeff
Image text: Dear Wiccan readers: I understand modern Wiccans are not usually all about the curses and hexes. But Darth Vader was recently converted from Episcopalianism and he's still figuring it all out.
Top Comic - This is a parody of the frequent conspiracy theories that have come about since the events of September 11, 2001. The use of the "grassy knoll" is a reference to the conspiracy theories surrounding the assassination of John F. Kennedy, a US President on Friday, November 22, 1963, in Dallas, Texas. Some people say they saw another or different shooter over on a "grassy knoll" by the road where JFK was shot.
Middle Left - Some people say that when women are pregnant, they have a certain glow about them, whether it is just their general happiness or something else. In this case, the woman is really pregnant and then promptly gives birth.
Middle - In this comic, the character says "Cogito Ergo Cogito" instead of the traditional phrase "Cogito Ergo Sum". The traditional phrase is Latin for I think therefore I am, which was said by René Descartes. In this comic, the character is playing it safe by just saying I think therefore I think.
Middle Left - This comic is a pun on the phrase "Bail out!" When it is used by fighter pilots, it means for them to hit their ejector seats and parachute to safety. In this comic, the pilots are using the phrase as would two people in a boat that is filling up with water.
Lower Middle - This is a joke on how in Star Wars they have lightsabers. In this case, they created black-lightsabers which use black light bulbs. Black lights just make every thing seem really eerie and you are able to see dust and dirt particles on everything.
Right - I think that one is pretty self explanatory and pretty gross.
Lower Middle Left - I'm not sure what is up with the sandwich making one, but it appears to be an inside joke somehow.
Bottom Left - This is a lawyer who is going to make a defense that will offend women and he prepared an opening statement incorrectly thinking there would be both men and women on the jury. This comic is an extension of the stereotypical lawyer opening "Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury...".
Bottom Right - From the start this is a full quote from Star Wars in which Conan Antonio Motti rips Darth Vader's ancient religion, which in the movie is The Force. Vader proceeds to force choke Motti until Moff Tarkin tells him to stop. In this comic, Vader's ancient religion is of course Wiccan.
Tech Support
by Jeff
Image text: I recently had someone ask me to go get a computer and turn it on so I could restart it. He refused to move further in the script until I said I had done that.
In this comic, Cueball is having a dream about being on a tech support call with his internet provider.
Cueball, naturally is running Haiku, an open source operating system that is compatible with BeOS. Of course, don't try to go to the haiku website today because the xkcd effect took it down.
Cueball is getting nowhere with the tech support personnel, so he attempts to have the member of the help desk find someone that has the stereotypical look of a geek: Cargo Pants with a subway map on their wall (of their cubicle).
When he finds a person who knows how to fix his problem. She says that the keyword to find a person who knows two programming language is: shibboleet. Shibboleet seems to be a combination of Shibboleth and the word "leet" which is short for "elite" in gamer and online circles.
The word shibboleth originates from Hebrew, and refers to features of language, and particularly to a word whose pronunciation identifies its speaker as being a member or not a member of a particular group. So, if I'm getting this right, if the person pronounces the word correct, they identify themselves as a fellow member of the community.
No word on if this actually works, but I'm sure some xkcd fans will have it implemented in their phone systems within the day.
Adjectives
by Jeff
Image text: 'Fucking ineffable' sounds like someone remembering how to do self-censorship halfway through a phrase.
Xkcd took a lot of the explanation out of this one by putting an explanation of the last word in perens below the word. Cheating! We've still got the other words to define though.
Let's start with after "improper".
Evanescent - tending to vanish like vapor.
Piquant - having an agreeable pungent taste.
Jejune - insubstantial: lacking in nutritive value.
Kafkaesque - relating to or in the manner of Franz Kafka or his writing.
Stochastic - being or having a random variable; "a stochastic variable"; "stochastic processes".
Fungible - a commodity that is freely interchangeable with another in satisfying an obligation.
The two people in the higher of the two comics are standing around drinking wine, possibly at a wine tasting because they are discussing the taste of Cabernet, which is a type of wine.
In the bottom comic, Cueball is trading stocks online as he comments on the fungible nature of the stocks and bonds.