Image text: Using a ring to bind someone you covet into your dark and twisted world? Wow, just got the subtext there. Also, the apparently eager Beyoncé would've made one badass Nazgȗl.

The song playing in this comic is "Single Ladies" by Beyonce.  Which apparently had one of the best videos of all time... Anyhow, Gil-Galad was the last high king of the Noldor in Middle Earth.  Galadriel was a queen of the elves in Middle Earth.  Eru was the one god of Middle-Earth who created the Elves and Men, and Aule created the Dwarves, but Eru eventually approved Aule's creations.  So, he sort of created the Dwarves as Eru was the only god to give a spirit to a being, as he did with the Dwarves.

The character in the beret is apparently the bartender in a bar that Sauron frequents.  In the comic, Sauron upon hearing the song by Beyonce in the bar, has the idea to create his magic ring plan which presents the plot of the Lord of the Rings triology of books and movies.

Image text: The reverse only works if the subject has a nervous twitch.

This is another instance of the "pro tip" meme, which is designed to turn the reader into an expert from a novice in one easy step.

This comic is suggesting that if a lie-detector was placed on its side, that it would function as a seismograph to detect the size of earthquakes.

Image text: The Strong Collatz Conjecture states that this holds for any set of obsessively-hand-applied rules.

The Collatz Conjecture is a undecided or unsolved mathematical conjecture in which you have to do just as the comic says.  However, the comic takes it one step further since this conjecture is unsolved, you can keep working on it (by hand) obsessively until you do not have any friends any more.  Unless those friends want to come over and do math equations and conjectures by hand with you.

Image text: Great, LO-M. Do you speak Bocce? I'm supposed to find one that speaks Bocce.

The text in the first frame is a biblical reference as Abraham, Isaac and Jacob are all people from the Bible.  The closest quote would be Exodus 3-5.  The quote is from the burning bush passage in the Bible.  It is possible the plant at the end of the tunnel could be a burning bush.

This comic is making an insinuation that the voice of God or God itself is C3PO from the Star Wars Universe.

In the Image text, the quote is from Star Wars: A New Hope in which Luke's uncle says the last two sentences of the image text to C3PO to make sure he speaks the same language as the moisture vaporators on their farm.  Booce is the language spoken by those moisture vaporators.

The use of LO-M looks to be a double reference to Elohim which is used as the name of God in the Jewish religion and the LOM series droids from the Star Wars universe.

The tunnel could signify the Large Hadron Collider and the search for the "God" particle.  The two particles falling behind the character in the first frame seems to signify that.

Image text: You roll for initiative, and ... [roll] ... wow, do you ever take it.

In this comic, there are two different groups playing two different dice games.  However, the dice got mixed up.  Instead of numbers, the first two are supposed to have another die with actions on them, as seen in the last panel.  The "sex" die got mixed in with the kids Dungeons and Dragons set because they did not organize the game cupboard.  The four people in the last panel are completely different than the two in the first 3.

The joke in the image text is a play on the word "initiative".  In Dungeons and Dragons you roll for initiative for an extra modifier to your roll of the dice.  In the image text, they are suggesting that someone accidentally rolled a sex die for initiative.  And "take initiative" means to take charge to take command outside of Dungeons and Dragons.

Image text: You'll be moved up from 49 of ~7 billion to 31 of ~7 billion.

Joshing means joking and the approximately 7 billion people is the population of the planet Earth.

Image text: Sometimes I'm terrified to realize how many options other people have.

The joke is in the image text because it is a repetition of the first line of the comic but replacing "I" with "other people".

Image text: The weird sense of duty really good sysadmins have can border on the sociopathic, but it's nice to know that it stands between the forces of darkness and your cat blog's servers.

This comic is a reference to the movie, Die Hard, in which Bruce Willis' character climbs through ventilation shafts and over broken glass to kill all the bad guys and rescue the hostages, including his wife.  That building was called the Nakatomi Plaza in the movie.

Uptime is just as it appears and is a measure of how much the servers are online vs. offline and usually is expressed in a %.

Image text: You want me to pick up waffle cones? Oh, right, for the wine. One sec, let me just derive your son's credit card number and I'll be on my way.

The principle of explosion means that if you assume that something is both true and untrue at the same time, then you can prove any conclusion.  Usually, someone would prove that something is true or false, but in the comic, the principle is used to derive a phone number and a credit card number.  The joke in the comic is taking the mathematical logic to the next level to make a joke about the first character's mom.

The equation in the third frame is the typical notation for a principle of explosion equation.  It means "P and Not P".  P represents some statement such as "the sky is blue".  So, the equation is: "The sky is blue and the sky is NOT blue."  From that premise, you can prove anything.  In the comic, you can even prove a phone number or credit card number.

Image text: Hey, why do YOU get to be the president of Tautology Clu-- wait, I can guess.

Tautology means to repeat the same phrase twice or two parts of a phrase that means the same thing.  This comic is a take on the repetitive nature of "honor" in the Honor Society.

The answer to the image text would be: I'm the president of the Tautology Club because I'm the president of the Tautology Club.