290: Fucking Blue Shells

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Fucking Blue Shells
You can evade blue shells in Double Dash, but it is deep magic.
Title text: You can evade blue shells in Double Dash, but it is deep magic.


Sometimes something goes wrong and you can only shout obscenities at it. For instance, when a bone breaks, or when something unexpected happens, or when a program breaks itself in a spectacular kind of way. There are a lot of things that necessitate this kind of response.

But, mainly the blue shells in Mario Kart. The blue shells, when fired, target the player currently in first place and stops them cold. In a close game, you can go from first to an unrecoverable last in one hit. 137: Dreams puts it best: Fuck. That. Shit.

The title text refers to the "Double Dash" edition of Mario Kart. This includes the technique to avoid being hit by the blue shell, but requires skillful timing to accomplish.


My Profanity Usage By Cause:
[Pie chart is shown]
[Injury is about 5% of pie chart]
[Irony is about 5% of pie chart]
[Misc is about 5% of pie chart]
[Segfaults is about 10% of pie chart]
[Mario Kart is about 75% of pie chart]

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I see Randall has yet to master the art of snaking. Davidy22 (talk) 00:23, 24 October 2012 (UTC)

As an aside, in my case at least, stubbed toes result in more swearing than broken bones. Having broken seven, I'm somewhat of an authority on the matter. 15:18, 14 September 2013 (UTC)

That's odd, to my recollection the use of the term "Deep Magic" in programming was a reference to the Narnia novels, as in "deep magic from the dawn of time". This isn't specified in the Jargon File? I'm quite certain that's how I heard it explained, circa 1986. (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

I believe that the proper way to play mkart at 200 ccs is to swear nonstop while you race and your kart refuses to turn, and then watching the highlight reel and laughing at your complete failure. RedHatGuy68 (talk) 02:07, 21 August 2016 (UTC)

Actual transcript of my first I've seconds on Rainbow Road: Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. FUUUUUUUUUK. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shiii-iii-iii-iiit! 19:32, 31 December 2016 (UTC)

Fuck.This is completely true, as I play Mario Kart 7, and I swear every time 1 of those Blue Shells hit me.I never get them, but everybody else gets them. 14:07, 6 October 2016 (UTC)

Note: The blue shell dodge with mushroom is (supposedly) possible in Mario Kart 8 as well. 03:15, 12 March 2017 (UTC)