393: Ultimate Game

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Ultimate Game
RIP, Gary.
Title text: RIP, Gary.


Gary Gygax was a game designer best known for co-creating the iconic nerd pastime Dungeons and Dragons; as such, he is commonly described as the "father of D&D." He died on March 4, 2008, three days before this comic was released.

The idea of playing games with supernatural entities in exchange for one's soul is an old one and has been referenced in many works. Here, the specific twist is that the victim can choose which game they want to play. Naturally, it is only fitting that Gary would challenge Death to D&D.

The problem is that Dungeons and Dragons isn't so much a game as it is a set of rules for describing stories. It requires the intervention of a Dungeon Master (or DM) to create a scenario which the players' characters must overcome. It's unclear exactly how the game between Gary and Death works, but given that D&D generally takes a long time to play due to the setup time and large amount of dice-rolling, and the fact that Gary seems to keep adding extra rulebooks (official or pseudo-official books which add new classes, items, spells, etc. for players to use), it's understandable why it would take longer than Death's boss (satan?) would like.

Although Gary is the father of D&D, Dave Arneson's contribution should not be ignored. Although xkcd did not cover his death in April 2009, a stick-figure tribute to the man who created the concept of role-playing does exist, courtesy Order of the Stick.


[Split screen. Man on office phone in upper left, Death on cell phone in bottom left.]
Man: Death?
Death: Speaking.
[Office. Man on office phone.]
Man: This is the boss. Where are you? You haven't been up to the office in days!
Death: I've been held up.
[Death on cell phone.]
Man: What happened?
Death: You know how when someone dies, they can challenge me to a game for their soul?
Man: Sure, standard procedure.
[Room with table. Table has figurines and paper strewn about. Gary Gygax and Death seated at the table. Gary Gygax leaning over his briefcase. Death on cell phone.]
Death: Well, we didn't count on this guy. I might be a while.
Gary Gygax: I add the paladin to my party.
Death: Oh, Jesus. He's getting out another rulebook.

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Why would Gygax choose to play such a luck-heavy game for his life? Davidy²²[talk] 02:18, 23 February 2013 (UTC)

You are kidding, right? Just in case not: Because it can be really long to finish it (therefore gains time by just playing it) and also because he created it. 19:44, 25 April 2013 (UTC)
In this situation, I'd rather play a luck-heavy game than a strategy one. Not that I'm a bad chess player, but Death is probably better. He's probably not better at Chutes/Snakes and Ladders, though. 03:43, 24 June 2015 (UTC)

"...Death's boss (satan?) would like." I'd guess Death's boss, in this case, is Jesus - at least he is addressed like that in the last frame ;-) 20:25, 22 May 2013 (UTC)

I would think that the "boss" is not meant to be any specific or well-known figure, Satan or Jesus. Based on his depiction, he seems rather generic. I think "Jesus" in the last panel is just used as an exclamation. 03:15, 23 June 2013 (UTC)

Couldn't Gygax just get a terrible role that makes him fail initiative and keep missing, then get totally pwned by a critical hit from Death?

Terrible rolls (or roles, if a bad character choice?) aside, with the alternative being eternal-whatever, it's probably worth a go to spin things out unless you're convinced that the eternity concerned is a better thing. (And actually a thing, not oblivion.) And if Gary's rotating new members into the party, as seen, then it could become a very long campaign indeed, lasting long after all the original group of characters have retired, become NPC flavour or individually succumbed to the many and various trials and tribulations thrown at them. Unless Death is the DM/GM/whatever (rather than a shared participant in some freeform collaborative game, which probably gives Gygax more than enough leeway to keep going) with enough experience to succesfully bring about a "Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies" event or foresee and prevent useful tricks such as the casting of Air Wall in naval battles to slew odds in the Adventurers' favour (<-true story... and even when the caster had run out of power, he bluffed enemy ships into colliding with each other by just waving his arms as if he had created yet another invisible barrier in their paths!) I could see him as outclassed in D&D as Discworld's Death apparently could sometimes be by chess ("REMIND ME AGAIN," he said, "HOW THE LITTLE HORSE-SHAPED ONES MOVE.") 14:54, 18 June 2013 (UTC)

"Anyone want to play Dungeons and Dragons for the next quadrillion years?" 21:11, 7 March 2014 (UTC)

Now if you could challenge Death to any game, would not "The Game" be the ultimate win against Death, as he would then always be the looser? -- Para (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

you made me lose. goddammit. 08:58, 3 June 2015 (UTC)

This is the page image for the TV Tropes page "Rules Lawyer". Just wanted to let you know. :) 09:42, 14 May 2015 (UTC)