526: Converting to Metric
|Converting to Metric|
Title text: According to River, "adequate" vacuuming systems drain the human body at about half a liter per second.
Most people will eventually develop an intuitive feel for how big certain measurements are (e.g., how long an inch or a foot is, how much a pound weighs). This comic points out that people who were brought up using the imperial system probably don't have the same intuitive understanding for metric units and attempts to provide some benchmarks for these people. Most of the benchmarks are common sense, highly-useful ones (e.g., if it's 30 degrees centigrade, you'd be quite comfortable outside dressed for the beach) but some of the benchmarks are humorous and/or completely useless. Benchmarks include:
- -20℃ - FuckFuckFuckCold and -30℃ - Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck!: This is basically what some people would say when they step outside at this temperature.
- -40℃ - Spit goes "clink": The temperature at which your spit would freeze before it hits the ground.
- 1 cm - Width of microSD card and 3cm - Length of SD card: Refers to the memory cards used in cell phones, digital cameras, etc.
- 1 m - Lightsaber Blade: Refers the weapon used in the Star Wars movie franchise. Canonically, the length of a Lightsaber's blade varies greatly depending on the setting of the weapon, but "one meter" is by no means a bad approximation.
- 170 cm - Summer Glau: Refers to the height of the actress who portrays the character River Tam on the TV show Firefly.
- 200 cm - Darth Vader: Refers to the height of the main antagonist from Star Wars.
- 16 m 4 cm - Human tower of Serenity crew: Again, this refers to the Firefly TV show, which takes place mostly on a space ship called Serenity. Presumably, if all the crew of Serenity were stacked on top of each other, this would be their combined height. The comic depicts four characters from the show standing on top of each other; the bottom figure is the crew's captain, Malcolm Reynolds in his signature coat.
- 110 kph - 30 m/s - Interstate (65 MPH): Refers to the American highway system.
- 120 kph - 35 m/s - Speed you actually go when it says "65": People routinely break the aforementioned speed limit.
- 30 mL - Nasal Passages and 40mL - Shot Glass: The comic points out that you could just about fill a shot glass using the mucus from your nose. Since shot glasses are usually used for mixed drinks, the comic jokes that this mucus could constitute a new, disgusting drink.
- 3 L - Two-liter bottle: Refers to a bottle which contains two liters (in the US usually soda) but itself occupies almost three liters (eg. when submerged).
- 30 L - Milk Crate: Refers to a type of small box originally used to transport milk but now often in demand to be used as bicycle basket, storage spaces, etc.
- 55 L - Summer Glau: Again, this refers to the actress from Firefly.
- 65 L - Dennis Kucinich: An American politician belonging to the Democratic party, noted for his relatively strong (for the US) leftest views.
- 75 L - Ron Paul: An American politician belonging to the rival Republican party, noted for his strong rightest views. As hinted at in the comic, he, Kucinich and Glau would not get along at all well together trapped inside a fridge.
- 3 g - Peanut M&M: A small chocolate candy
- 5 kg - LCD Monitor: A modern flat-screen-style monitor.
- 15 kg - CRT Monitor: An older-style, cathode ray tube-based monitor.
- 4 kg - Cat and 4.1 kg - Cat (With Caption): Refers to the internet's love of putting captions on cats. Usually, this is done in a graphics program, but here the cat is actually physically carrying around his caption.
- 150 kg - Shaq: Shaquille O'Neal, a famously tall basketball player.
- 200 kg - Your Mom, 220 kg - Your Mom (incl. cheap jewelry) and 223 kg - Your Mom (also incl. Makeup): Refers to a common type of joking insult whereby someone insults someone else's mother in a creative way. Here, the comic slyly calls your mom fat and implies she wears way too much jewelry and almost 7 pounds of makeup.
The title text refers once again to Summer Glau's Firefly character, River, who (after being subjected to a long series of medical experiments) is severely mentally ill and often comes out with macabre—though scientifically accurate—pronouncements.
- Guide to Converting to Metric
- The key to converting to metric is establishing new reference points. When you hear "26 degrees centigrade", instead of thinking "That's 79 degrees fahrenheit" you should think, "that's warmer then a house but cool for swimming." Here are some helpful tables of reference points:
- 60 degrees centigrade - Earth's Hottest
- 45 degrees centigrade - Dubai Heat Wave
- 40 degrees centigrade - Southern US Heat Wave
- 35 degrees centigrade - Northern US Heat Wave
- 30 degrees centigrade - Beach weather
- 25 degrees centigrade - Warm Room
- 20 degrees centigrade - Room Temperature
- 10 degrees centigrade - Jacket Weather
- 0 degrees centigrade - Snow!
- -5 degrees centigrade - Cold Day (Boston)
- -10 degrees centigrade - Cold Day (Moscow)
- -20 degrees centigrade - FuckFuckFuckCold
- -30 degrees centigrade - Fuuuuuuuuuuck!
- -40 degrees centigrade - Spit goes "clink"
- [Stick figure next to last three lines.]
- Man: Pthoo [Man spits.]
- Spit: Clink! [Spit bounces off ground.]
- 1cm - Width of microSD card
- 3cm - Length of SD card
- 12cm - CD Diameter
- 14cm - Penis
- 15cm - BIC pen
- 80cm - Doorway width
- 1m - Lightsaber Blade
- 170cm - Summer Glau
- 200cm - Darth Vader
- 2.5m - Ceiling
- 5m - Car-length
- 16m4cm - Human tower of Serenity crew
- [Human tower of Serenity crew stick figures depicted taking up from second line of panel to bottom.]
- 5 kph - 1.5 m/s - Walking
- 13 kph - 3.5 m/s - Jogging
- 25 kph - 7 m/s - Sprinting
- 35 kph - 10 m/s - Fastest Human
- 45 kph - 13 m/s - Housecat
- 55 kph - 15 m/s - Rabbit
- 75 kph - 20 m/s - Raptor
- 100 kph - 25 m/s - Slow Highway
- 110 kph - 30 m/s - Interstate (65 MPH)
- 120 kph - 35 m/s - Speed you actually go when it says "65"
- 140 kph - 40 m/s - Raptor on Hoverboard
- 3mL - Blood in a fieldmouse
- 5mL - Teaspoon
- 30mL - Nasal Passages
- 40mL - Shot Glass
- So when it's blocked, the mucus in your nose could about fill a shot glass.
- [Image of a shot glass.] Related: I've invented the worst mixed drink ever.
- 350mL - Soda Can
- 500mL - Water Bottle
- 3L - Two-Liter Bottle
- 5L - Blood in a Human Male
- 30L - Milk Crate
- 55L - Summer Glau
- 65L - Dennis Kucinich
- 75L - Ron Paul
- 200L - Fridge
- [Cueball shoving Ron Paul, Summer Glau, and Dennis Kucinich into fridge.]
- [Above fridge, circled, is 55+65+75<200]
- 3g - Peanut M&M
- 100g - Cell Phone
- 500g - Bottled Water
- 1kg - Ultraportable Laptop
- 2kg - Light-Medium Laptop
- 3kg - Heavy Laptop
- 5kg - LCD Monitor
- 15kg - CRT Monitor
- 4kg - Cat [Drawing of cat.]
- 4.1kg - Cat (With Caption) [Drawing of cat, going "Mrowl?", and holding a caption.]
- 60kg - Lady
- 70kg - Dude
- 150kg - Shaq
- [Stick figure of Megan and Cueball beside previous 3 lines.]
- 200kg - Your Mom
- 220kg - Your Mom (incl. cheap jewelry)
- 223kg - Your Mom (also incl. Makeup)