Editing 919: Tween Bromance

{{comic
| number    = 919
| date      = July 1, 2011
| title     = Tween Bromance
| image     = tween_bromance.png
| titletext = Verbiage. Va-jay-jay. Irregardless.
}}
==Explanation==
Apparently, Randall hates some ridiculous neologisms. [[Cueball]] seems to be dictating a "Tween bromance" story or novel to [[Megan]], who is possibly typing it up. He is including all the words that get to Megan in a sequence. Megan is just annoyed and starts to shriek in rage; considering Cueball keeps speaking more annoying words in the title text, that seems to have been the point.

*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Tween Tween]" means a pre-adolescent. Portmanteau of ''teen'' and ''between'', specifically above the age of 9 (the last value not in the tens) and below the age of 13 (the first actual "-teen" number).
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bromance Bromance]" means a close non-sexual friendship between two males. Portmanteau of ''brother'' and ''romance''.
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=guesstimate Guesstimate]" means an estimate made with very little information. Portmanteau of ''guess'' and ''estimate''.
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=frenemy Frenemy]" means a friend who is also a rival. Portmanteau of ''friend'' and ''enemy''.
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=yiff Yiff]" is a word invented by the {{w|furry community}}. In most contexts it simply means "copulate", supposedly derived from the sound a fox makes during mating, and can refer to any form of sexual activity, including cybersex.
*"{{Wiktionary|moist}}" is an ordinary word, but one that many people find mildly creepy, especially in this context.
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=taint Taint]" is the part between the genitals and the anus (perineum) in slang.
*"[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panties Panties]" is a common term in the U.S. for women's underwear.
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=preggers Preggers]" a slang term for being pregnant.
*"{{Wiktionary|verbiage}}" is a fairly new usage of an older word, meaning too many words used to explain a subject.
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=va-jay-jay Va-jay-jay]" /vəˈjājā/ IPA /vəˈdʒeɪdʒeɪ/ is just a way of saying "vagina".
*"[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Irregardless Irregardless]" is a {{w|solecism}}. [http://www.merriam-webster.com/video/0037-irregardless.htm Or perhaps this portmanteau.]

So, the full sentence roughly translates to: By my rough guess, my friend-slash-rival engaged in sexual activity so intensely that her wet perineum caused her underwear to become pregnant.

This is probably nonsensical, as clothing cannot bear children.{{Citation needed}}  It may also reflect Cueball’s intentional parody of writers who lack understanding of anatomy/basic reasoning.  However, at a stretch, the word “preggers” could be interpreted to refer to the rare, literal meaning of pregnant: full/filled.  By this logic, “her moist taint made her panties preggers” would simply be an unusual way to say “her underwear were filled up with liquid”.  But in that case: ew.

Like this comic fills a sentence with (gross) neologisms, [[550: Density]] crams a sentence with memes.

According to [[1485: Friendship]], Randall doesn't like the word ''bromance'' much either. Uncomfortable synonyms are also seen in [[1322: Winter]] and [[2352: Synonym Date]].

Supplementary Explanation: 

Cueball's sentence is packed with words that are known irritants. Virtually every noun, adjective and adverb in his sentence is a well-known "irritating word." Cueball has constructed a complete, coherent sentence using only those words. The title of the comic, "Tween Bromance," provides two more "irritating words." Megan begins to react halfway through Cueball's sentence, and breaks down at the end, finally not able to take any more. The joke is that of {{w|Schadenfreude}}, since Cueball knows these words irritate Megan, and has created a sentence designed to pique her irritation to the maximum.

Her reaction is not unreasonable.

Tween: A contraction of "in-between," as in, between childhood and adolescence. This term refers to children between the ages of 10 and 12 or so. People hate this word because kids aged 10 to 12 should be called "kids." There is no reason to call them something else.

Bromance: A portmanteau of "Bro" (itself a slang term) meaning a close personal ally, and "romance," depicting a strong bond between two men without any implied sexual component. People hate this word because it cuts both ways: it connotes a homosexual relationship, but that is not part of the relationship type it describes. 

Guesstimate: A portmanteau of "guess" and "estimate."  People hate this word because it improperly interpolates two conflicting terms. A guess can be pulled out of thin air; an estimate must rely on some kind of measurable quantity to be estimated. Thus, "Guesstimate," to most people, means, "I don't know what I'm talking about, but I want you to pretend I do." 

Frenemy: A portmanteau of "Friend" and "Enemy." People hate this word because there is never a reason to use it. You might refer to an acquaintance as a friend, or as an enemy, or as neither one; but you would never refer to them as a frenemy. In The Godfather II, Michael Corleone said, "Keep your friends close. Keep your enemies closer." He was talking about frenemies, in a concrete and specific way. You know what he didn't say? Frenemy. You know why? Because it's a stupid word.

Yiffed: I've been doing this "people hate this word because" thing, and so far I think it's worked. But "yiff" is not a word people hate, mostly because they have never heard of it. It refers to a sexual practice among furries. Googling the sexual practices of furries is left as an exercise for the reader.

So Hard: This is an adverb that in itself is not creepy, but in context becomes creepy. On its face, it is a generic intensifier like "really" or "literally." But it's kind of out there, socio-linguistically. For example, "I love you" is fine. "I really love you" is also fine, if a bit desperate. "I love you so hard" is creepy. On the other hand, "My men have been working so hard, they deserve a break," has no creepiness to it at all. So we toss our hats to the wind on this one.

Moist: This is one of the most-hated words in the English language. No one knows why. The comments section is down there, go nuts.

Taint: The reference is to the perineum, the small patch of skin between the genitals and the anus. People hate this word for several reasons. Some hate it because it has to do with a body part they'd rather not think about. Some hate it because it identifies that part incorrectly, and unscientifically. Others hate it because it implies that biologists have nothing better to do with their time than come up with Anglo-Saxon terms to define body parts. It doesn't matter; the word "taint" here is meant to make you crinkle your nose, and that's all.

Panties: Womens' underwear. Like "Moist," this word is a target of hate, without a clear reason. 

Preggers: A euphemism for "pregnant." This term is undesirable on its face because a slang term ought naturally take less time than the word it's standing in for. "Pregnant" and "Preggers" have the same number of syllables, so why have it? 

The title text gives a few more examples of words that "twitch" people, like Megan. 

Verbiage: No one wants to have their text referred to as "verbiage," (because no one will read it). Also, no one wants to read "verbiage," (because it's a waste of time).

Va-Jay-Jay: A jocular reference to the vagina. Pause for big laughs.

Irregardless: Not the worst offender, grammar-wise, but the one everyone knows about from Saturday Night Live.

==Transcript==
:[All of Cueball's lines are overlaid over the entire comic; the panels listed are merely the ones directly under each sentence fragment.]
:[Cueball is standing smugly behind Megan, who is seated in front of a computer and typing.]
:Cueball: By my guesstimate,

:Cueball: my frenemy yiffed so hard

:Cueball: her moist taint made
:[Megan's eye twitches.]

:Cueball: her panties preggers!
:Megan: ''STOP IT STOP IT!''

==Trivia==
*In the first frame, the back of Megan's chair is missing.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Furries]]
[[Category:Sex]]