explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

68: Five Thirty

2014-04-02T23:55:56Z

108.162.215.61: /* Comic Panels' Explanations (Numbered left to right, top to bottom): */

{{comic
| number = 68
| date = February 24, 2006
| title = Five Thirty
| image = five_thirty.jpg
| titletext = The 8th panel is my favorite
}}

==Explanation==
At 5:30 AM, one's sleep-deprived mind sometimes comes up with things that seem like nonsense later.

None of the twelve panels in this comic seem to have any correlation with one another, each one being its own "story," and none of them really make any sense. It is unknown whether Randall really wrote this comic while awake at 5:30 in the morning, or if he wrote it while completely alert and is trying to pass off his rejected ideas by saying what one's mind may experience when trying to process information at an hour when the person is not used to being awake.

== Comic Panels' Explanations (Numbered left to right, top to bottom): ==

1: "80s night" is a special theme many nightclubs hold, inviting their guests to wear fashions that were popular in the 1980's while playing dance music from the same period.

2: {{w|Jack the Ripper}} was an infamous serial killer in Victorian {{w|England}}. {{w|Jack Black}} is a rock star and actor. "There is no Tuesday" is likely a reference to ''{{w|The Matrix}}''.

3: There doesn't seem to be too much to this panel that isn't self-explanatory, but it's possible that there's a reference to the ''{{w|Civilization (video game)|Civilization}}'' series of video games, in which it's possible (albeit unlikely) for medieval soldiers to attack and destroy 20th-century military helicopters.

4: Stick figures standing upright are indeed drawn without any thought as to which section of their legs are the shins.

5: It's hard to tell what the two stick figures are actually doing, but the most common guess it that they're both wearing watches. In that case they likely forgot to adjust their clocks for a time change (shortly before this comic was released, {{w|Daylight Savings Time}} had just begun in the United States) and were off in their schedules as a result.

6: "Ointment" may be a reference to the infamous lotion scene in ''{{w|Silence of the Lambs}}'', as the panel appears to be invoking horror movie visuals.

7: The farthest left angle is labeled theta. The joke is that finding the cosine, the length of the adjacent leg divided by the length of the hypotenuse, would be difficult as the adjacent leg is poorly drawn and does not resemble a straight line to be measured.

8: Lots of jokes have been made out of the template "does liking X make you gay?", where the speaker is afraid that he may be a homosexual. Here, the speaker has apparently transformed into a {{w|mermaid}} at some point. His friend seems to be eager to both turn into a mermaid himself, and confirm himself for a homosexual.

9: Waving a gun around and declaring that things you hate are "for pussies" is stereotypical "{{w|macho}}" behavior. Possibly, the man with the gun is going to cut the other man's hair with bullets because it's more "macho" than going to the barber.

10: This doesn't seem to mean anything whatsoever. However, both of the characters say something irrational: "My hair is bleeding" is irrational because strands of hair can't bleed, and "√3" is an {{w|irrational number}}.

11: A bachelor party is traditionally raucous party that is thrown for a groom on the night before his wedding. This does nothing to explain why the man is upside down.

12: Likely a reference to the "{{w|ant on a rubber rope}}" thought experiment. Apparently in Randall's mind the experiment does not end well for the ant.

----

The title text could actually refer to two different panels. If a person chooses to read the comic left-to-right, top-to-bottom, the eighth panel could be the one with where Cueball asks "Does being a mermaid for five minutes make you gay?" However, if a person chooses to read the comic top-to-bottom, left-to-right, the eighth panel will instead be the one with Cueball hanging upside down shouting "Bachelor party!"

==Transcript==
:Comics from 5:30 AM
:[A succession of unrelated and completely random panels.]

:Cueball: It's 80's night at the club. Wanna go?

:Friend: There is no Tuesday.
:Cueball: Jack the Ripper or Jack Black?

:[Cueball in this panel is holding a glinting sword.]
:Friend: You crashed my helicopter!
:Cueball: Verily!

:[A small figure is talking with a larger figure.]
:Figure 1: Basically, neither of us have shins.
:Figure 2: Over and out.

:[Two men are shown: one with three arms, and another with just two. All arms have round appendages at their ends.]
:Men: shitshitshitshitshitshitdaylightsavingsshitshitshitshitsh

:[Two figures with pumpkins (carved with faces) for heads.]
:Figure 1: You're out of ointment and out of time!

:[A diagram of a right-angled triangle, with a theta at the smallest angle.]
:FUCK THE COSINE

:Friend: Does being a mermaid for five minutes make you gay?
:Cueball: I hope so!

:[The friend is holding a gun to Cueball's head.]
:Friend: Barbershops are for pussies.

:Friend: My hair is bleeding.
:Cueball: √3

:[Cueball seems to be walking on the ceiling.]
:Cueball: Bachelor party!

:[Warning sign with picture of an ant.]
:WARNING: STRETCHY DEATH

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Math]]

89: Gravitational Mass

2014-03-02T03:43:32Z

108.162.215.61: /* Explanation */ everyone can warp space time

{{comic
| number = 89
| date = April 14, 2006
| title = Gravitational Mass
| image = gravitational_mass.jpg
| titletext = She's so fat the attraction goes up as the CUBE of the distance instead of the square
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|This comic is so Einstein – Yo' momma is just a funny additional joke here. See "Principle of relativity" by Einstein. Furthermore some language issues have to be solved.}}

A well known joke format goes: "Yo' momma's so fat, when she X, she Y." For example: "Yo' momma's so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits ''around'' the house! Variations play with the format, for example: "Yo' momma's so fat, she fell in the grand Canyon and got stuck!"

[[Black Hat]] launches into a long description about the relativity of gravity and inertia that presumably will eventually lead to a Yo' Momma joke along the lines of "she's fat and not that attractive", but then gets bored or loses momentum and cuts to the chase.

The title text is a play on the law of gravitational attraction, which diminishes as the square of the distance. So if the distance between two objects doubles, the attraction is reduced to a quarter. And if the distance is halved, the attraction quadruples. Black Hat is saying that the attraction goes up as the cube, so if the distance is halved, the attraction increases eight-fold. This implies that "your momma is so fat, she can warp space-time". However, everyone, no matter how thin, can warp space time; contrary to Black Hat's explanation, the reason that objects have equal gravitational and inertial mass is that anything with mass causes a warping of space time that causes all other objects (as well as things without any rest mass, such as photons) to experience the same gravitational acceleration.

==Transcript==
:Black Hat: Gravitational mass is identical to inertial mass. That is, the amount of inertia something has and the amount of gravity it has are effectively the same. What's interesting is that there doesn't seem to be any reason this should be true. One could imagine an extremely large object with lots of resistance to force and no gravity (or vice versa), but this is never observed.
:Black Hat: You know what? I'm just gonna skip the rest of the buildup and say it: Yo mama's fat.
{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Physics]]

1256: Questions

2014-03-02T03:37:33Z

108.162.215.61: /* Section one */ add Lyft (and, yes, it is spelled that way) to explain car mustaches

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Incomplete.}}
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon".

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." (This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.)

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
===Single panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||
|-
|Why is sex so important?||
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe, Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards like Harry won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns (a revolver can't shoot lightning or summon items or teleport its user). Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is a children's book (which usually doesn't include guns) set in England (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}
===Section one===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? ||
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?||
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?||
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?||
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| See "Why are there snakes?" below.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||See {{w|Pearl#Creation of a pearl}}.
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?||
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||See {{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters}}.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||Fuzzy pink mustaches are used to designate cars in the {{w|Lyft}} service.
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?||
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?||
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?||See {{w|Klingon#Redesign}}.
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?||See {{w|Zero-ohm link}}.
|-
| Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||
|-
|Why do trees die?||
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||
|-
|Why aren't Pokemon real?||
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?||
|-
|}

=== Other questions ===
(Some questions in the transcript are linked to their answers.)
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there snakes? || The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being poisonous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
| Why do oysters have pearls? || {{w|Creation of a pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
| Why are ducks called ducks? || {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
| Why are Kyle and Cartman friends? || The question in all likelihood is addressed towards the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?"
|-
| Why is there an arrow on Aang's head? || Aang is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
| Why do dying people reach up? || In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them.
|-
| Why are old Klingons different? || {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
| Why are there 0 Ohm resistors? || A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, {{w|Zero-ohm link| Wikipedia gives a sufficient explanation for its uses}}.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}}.
|-
| Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. (France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.)These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|-
| Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man (and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned). Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [Steve Duffy, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for geese. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried lasers and bullhorns -- hey, get out of here, you crows -- and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." (Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}).
|-
| Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
| Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type (such as Mr. Mime) are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears (which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as).
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:(This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. Questions are grouped by section and given in roughly columnar order for the horizontal text, followed by the vertical text. None of the questions have question marks. The comic links to a [http://xkcd.com/1256/large/ large version] of the word cloud.)

:Title: Questions found in Google autocomplete

:The single panels
:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing
:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts
:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels
:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important
:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

:Section one
:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say Uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after http
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arrow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird

:Section two
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real

:Section three
:{{w|Cremaster_muscle|Why do testicles move}}
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:[http://supplement-geek.com/caffeine-hair-loss-thicker-fuller-hai/ Why is there caffeine in my shampoo]
:{{w|Mastodynia|Why do your boobs hurt}}

:Section four
:Why aren't economists rich
:[http://www.alsintl.com/blog/soccer-vs-football/ Why do Americans call it soccer]
:{{w|Tinnitus|Why are my ears ringing}}
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X-Men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers

:Section five
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:{{w|Olbers' paradox|Why is space black}}
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the Moon
:Why is NASA shutting down

:Section six
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:[http://www.burkemuseum.org/spidermyth/myths/comein.html Why do spiders come inside]
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary

:Section seven
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:[http://www.md-health.com/Knee-Clicking.html Why do knees click]
:[http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/explainer/2010/08/e_is_for_fail.html Why aren't there E grades]
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good

:Section eight
:{{w|The Bible and slavery|Why are there slaves in The Bible}}
:[http://www.abc.net.au/science/articles/2004/11/04/1234875.htm Why do twins have different fingerprints]
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons

:Section nine
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:[http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-phlegm.htm Why is there phlegm]

:Section ten
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:[http://pokemon.wikia.com/wiki/Pok%C3%A9mon_Types Why is Psychic weak to Bug]
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space

:Section eleven
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:[http://goodreasonblog.blogspot.com/2009/06/is-there-owl-on-american-dollar-bill.html Why is there an owl on the dollar bill]
:Why do owls attack people
:{{w|2008–13 United States ammunition shortage|Why are AK47s so expensive}}

:Section twelve
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks

:Section thirteen
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T Minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America

:Section fourteen
:[https://support.google.com/chrome/answer/1342714 Why is https crossed out in red]
:[https://support.google.com/chrome/answer/1342714 Why is there a line through https]
:[https://support.google.com/chrome/answer/1342714 Why is there a red line through https on Facebook]
:[[wikipedia:HTTP_Secure | Why is https important]]

:Section fifteen
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are the ducks in my pool
:{{w|Race and appearance of Jesus|Why is Jesus white}}
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q Tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:[http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Ultrasound-scan/Pages/introduction.aspx Why are ultrasounds important]
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong

:Vertical questions
:(The following are vertical.)
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:[http://gis.stackexchange.com/a/17546 Why is GPS free]
:Why are trees tall
:[http://www.serebiiforums.com/showthread.php?285504-Why-can-Mr-Mime-be-female Why are there female Mr Mimes]
:Why is there lava
:Why is {{w|YKK Group|YKK}} on all zippers
:Why is life so boring
:{{w|Dizziness|Why do I feel dizzy}}
:{{w|Seven-day_week#Origins|Why are there weeks}}
:[http://www.dogsonly.org/stormfear.html Why are dogs afraid of fireworks]
:Why is there no king in England

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]

1256: Questions

2014-03-02T03:25:17Z

108.162.215.61: /* Other questions */ 9/11 is an exception to the point about lack of battles or events in which foreign bases would have helped

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Incomplete.}}
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon".

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." (This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.)

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
===Single panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||
|-
|Why is sex so important?||
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe, Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards like Harry won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns (a revolver can't shoot lightning or summon items or teleport its user). Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is a children's book (which usually doesn't include guns) set in England (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}
===Section one===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? ||
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?||
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?||
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?||
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| See "Why are there snakes?" below.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||See {{w|Pearl#Creation of a pearl}}.
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?||
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||See {{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters}}.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?||
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?||
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?||See {{w|Klingon#Redesign}}.
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?||See {{w|Zero-ohm link}}.
|-
| Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||
|-
|Why do trees die?||
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||
|-
|Why aren't Pokemon real?||
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?||
|-
|}

=== Other questions ===
(Some questions in the transcript are linked to their answers.)
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there snakes? || The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being poisonous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
| Why do oysters have pearls? || {{w|Creation of a pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
| Why are ducks called ducks? || {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
| Why are Kyle and Cartman friends? || The question in all likelihood is addressed towards the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?"
|-
| Why is there an arrow on Aang's head? || Aang is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
| Why do dying people reach up? || In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them.
|-
| Why are old Klingons different? || {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
| Why are there 0 Ohm resistors? || A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, {{w|Zero-ohm link| Wikipedia gives a sufficient explanation for its uses}}.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}}.
|-
| Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. (France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.)These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|-
| Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man (and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned). Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [Steve Duffy, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for geese. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried lasers and bullhorns -- hey, get out of here, you crows -- and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." (Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}).
|-
| Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
| Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type (such as Mr. Mime) are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears (which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as).
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:(This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. Questions are grouped by section and given in roughly columnar order for the horizontal text, followed by the vertical text. None of the questions have question marks. The comic links to a [http://xkcd.com/1256/large/ large version] of the word cloud.)

:Title: Questions found in Google autocomplete

:The single panels
:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing
:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts
:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels
:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important
:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

:Section one
:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say Uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after http
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arrow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird

:Section two
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real

:Section three
:{{w|Cremaster_muscle|Why do testicles move}}
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:[http://supplement-geek.com/caffeine-hair-loss-thicker-fuller-hai/ Why is there caffeine in my shampoo]
:{{w|Mastodynia|Why do your boobs hurt}}

:Section four
:Why aren't economists rich
:[http://www.alsintl.com/blog/soccer-vs-football/ Why do Americans call it soccer]
:{{w|Tinnitus|Why are my ears ringing}}
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X-Men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers

:Section five
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:{{w|Olbers' paradox|Why is space black}}
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the Moon
:Why is NASA shutting down

:Section six
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:[http://www.burkemuseum.org/spidermyth/myths/comein.html Why do spiders come inside]
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary

:Section seven
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:[http://www.md-health.com/Knee-Clicking.html Why do knees click]
:[http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/explainer/2010/08/e_is_for_fail.html Why aren't there E grades]
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good

:Section eight
:{{w|The Bible and slavery|Why are there slaves in The Bible}}
:[http://www.abc.net.au/science/articles/2004/11/04/1234875.htm Why do twins have different fingerprints]
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons

:Section nine
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:[http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-phlegm.htm Why is there phlegm]

:Section ten
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:[http://pokemon.wikia.com/wiki/Pok%C3%A9mon_Types Why is Psychic weak to Bug]
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space

:Section eleven
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:[http://goodreasonblog.blogspot.com/2009/06/is-there-owl-on-american-dollar-bill.html Why is there an owl on the dollar bill]
:Why do owls attack people
:{{w|2008–13 United States ammunition shortage|Why are AK47s so expensive}}

:Section twelve
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks

:Section thirteen
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T Minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America

:Section fourteen
:[https://support.google.com/chrome/answer/1342714 Why is https crossed out in red]
:[https://support.google.com/chrome/answer/1342714 Why is there a line through https]
:[https://support.google.com/chrome/answer/1342714 Why is there a red line through https on Facebook]
:[[wikipedia:HTTP_Secure | Why is https important]]

:Section fifteen
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are the ducks in my pool
:{{w|Race and appearance of Jesus|Why is Jesus white}}
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q Tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:[http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Ultrasound-scan/Pages/introduction.aspx Why are ultrasounds important]
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong

:Vertical questions
:(The following are vertical.)
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:[http://gis.stackexchange.com/a/17546 Why is GPS free]
:Why are trees tall
:[http://www.serebiiforums.com/showthread.php?285504-Why-can-Mr-Mime-be-female Why are there female Mr Mimes]
:Why is there lava
:Why is {{w|YKK Group|YKK}} on all zippers
:Why is life so boring
:{{w|Dizziness|Why do I feel dizzy}}
:{{w|Seven-day_week#Origins|Why are there weeks}}
:[http://www.dogsonly.org/stormfear.html Why are dogs afraid of fireworks]
:Why is there no king in England

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]

Talk:216: Romantic Drama Equation

2014-03-02T03:14:45Z

108.162.215.61: added No, he's right. Notice the x-n term. x<n, so x-n is negative.

This can't be right, even at 50/50, the number of gay pairings far outnumbers the number of straight pairings.[[Special:Contributions/80.235.105.134|80.235.105.134]] 20:10, 28 February 2013 (UTC) Moved from article page
:Not quite. Consider a cast of 4 with 2 male (A, B) and 2 female (C, D). Possible gay pairings - 2 (A-B and C-D). Possible straight pairings - 4 (A-C, A-D, B-C, B-D){{unsigned ip|122.200.61.203}}

:He says for large casts. For 2000 cast members, with 1000 of each gender, the gay couplings comes out at 999,000 and straight at 1,000,000. Presumably this is the small cross over the diagram alludes to. If you substitute x = n/2 into the equations, then you get (n^2-2n)/4 for the gay combinations and n^2/4 for the straight combinations, so for gender balanced cast size of n, the straight combinations outnumber the gay by n/2 {{unsigned ip | 141.101.98.229}}

There is a typo in his formula for gay casts. The + should be a -. {{unsigned ip|199.27.128.159}}
No, he's right. Notice the x-n term. x<n, so x-n is negative.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.61|108.162.215.61]] 03:14, 2 March 2014 (UTC)

This also the small implication that "Queer as Folk" was so dull that Randall produced this equation to occupy his mind during it. I often find my mind wandering while sat watching soaps with my other half. [[User:Drmouse|Drmouse]] ([[User talk:Drmouse|talk]]) 14:20, 3 January 2014 (UTC)

978: Citogenesis

2014-03-02T02:07:41Z

108.162.215.61: /* Explanation */ not paying attention to what I was doing and put four ~ in an actual page. Force of habit from discussion pages

{{comic
| number = 978
| date = November 16, 2011
| title = Citogenesis
| image = citogenesis.png
| titletext = I just read a pop-science book by a respected author. One chapter, and much of the thesis, was based around wildly inaccurate data which traced back to... Wikipedia. To encourage people to be on their toes, I'm not going to say what book or author.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is calling into question the {{w|Wikipedia#Accuracy of content|accuracy}} of {{w|Wikipedia}}. This is a favorite past-time of librarians and professional researchers, and not usually one of [[Randall]]'s. But, to take it seriously for a moment: People, Wikipedia is editable by anyone. If you are doing serious work, follow through the citations, and decide which are from upstanding sources, and which are just people writing on their blog, and which are people writing on their blog who know what they are talking about.

The title of the comic is a play on the word [http://www.merriam-webster.com/medical/cytogenesis cytogenesis]. Cytogenesis is the formation of cells and their development. Citogenesis, on the other hand is a [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/portmanteau portmanteau] of 'Citation' and 'Genesis'. [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/citation Citation] meaning quoting a source. [http://mw1.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/genesis?show=1&t=1346949206 Genesis] being the origin of something. So, citogenesis would be the creation of a quote that can be used to back-up a fact or statement.

The comic is discussing citogenesis occurring on Wikipedia. {{w|Wikipedia}} is a free and freely editable encyclopedia that aims to become the most complete and correct knowledge base available, in all languages, to all people. Wikipedia is managed by the {{w|Wikimedia Foundation}} who publish {{w|MediaWiki}}, a web-based {{w|wiki}} engine written in {{w|PHP}}. The explain xkcd wiki is run on a MediaWiki server.

Following this comic, the actual {{w|Scroll lock}} and {{w|Steven Chu}} articles {{w|Talk:Scroll_lock#Thanks_Randall|were both}} {{w|Talk:Steven_Chu#Scroll_lock_key|wiki-bombed}} by "helpful" editors trying to enforce Randall's reality on the Internets. The Wikipedia article on {{w|Citogensis}} redirects to the {{w|Reliability of Wikipedia#Information loop|information loop}} section on the article "Reliability of Wikipedia". That section ends with crediting the term to "citogenesis" to "webcomic artist Randall Munroe", with a link to this comic.

==Transcript==
:Where Citations Come From:
:Citogenesis Step #1
:Through a convoluted process, a user's brain generates facts. These are typed into Wikipedia.
:[A guy with short hair sits at a desk, typing on a laptop.]
:Guy: (typing) The "scroll lock" key was was designed by future Energy Secretary Steven Chu in a college project.

:A rushed writer checks Wikipedia for a summary of their subject.
:[Ponytail sits at a desk, typing on a desktop.]
:Ponytail: (typing) US Energy Secretary Steven Chu, (Nobel Prizewinner and creator of the ubiquitous "scroll lock" key) testified before Congress today...
:Step #2

:Surprised readers check Wikipedia, see the claim, and flag it for review. A passing editor finds the piece and adds it as a citation.
:[Cueball sits on a couch with a laptop in his lap, typing.]
:Cueball: Google is your friend, people. (typing) <nowiki><ref>{{cite web|url=</nowiki>
:Step #3

:Step #4
:Now that other writers have a real source, they repeat the fact.
:[A flow chart, with "Wikipedia citation" in the center. The word "Wikipedia" is in black, the word "citations" is white with a red background.
:A black arrow leads from "brain" to "Wikipedia."
:A black arrow labeled "words" leads from "Wikipedia" to "careless writers," and a red arrow labeled "citations" leads back to "Wikipedia citations."
:A black & red arrow leads from "Wikipedia" to "cited facts" which leads to "slightly more careful writers," which leads to "more citations," which leads back to :"Wikipedia" (all black & red arrows).]
:References proliferate, completing the citogenesis process.

==Trivia==
*We will probably never know the book or author Randall mentions in the title text, but there is a nice similar story about the former German minister {{w|Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg}}. His complete name contains fifteen names/words and reads: '''Karl-Theodor Maria Nikolaus Johann Jacob Philipp Franz Joseph Sylvester Freiherr von und zu Guttenberg'''. An anonymous user added one more ('''Wilhelm''') to the German Wikipedia, just the evening before Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg was presented as the new Federal Minister of Economics and Technology on February 10, 2009. The next day many major German newspapers published this wrong name ([http://translate.google.com/translate?sl=de&tl=en&js=n&prev=_t&hl=en&ie=UTF-8&layout=2&eotf=1&u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bildblog.de%2F5704%2Fwie-ich-freiherr-von-guttenberg-zu-wilhelm-machte%2F translation of bildblog.de]). But the joke doesn't stop there, because that minister was later found guilty of plagiarism, which resulted in the revocation of his doctorate and eventually his resignation as Minister of Defence, on March 1, 2011.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]

978: Citogenesis

2014-03-02T02:06:07Z

108.162.215.61: /* Explanation */ Added that the Wikipedia article links back to this comic strip.

{{comic
| number = 978
| date = November 16, 2011
| title = Citogenesis
| image = citogenesis.png
| titletext = I just read a pop-science book by a respected author. One chapter, and much of the thesis, was based around wildly inaccurate data which traced back to... Wikipedia. To encourage people to be on their toes, I'm not going to say what book or author.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is calling into question the {{w|Wikipedia#Accuracy of content|accuracy}} of {{w|Wikipedia}}. This is a favorite past-time of librarians and professional researchers, and not usually one of [[Randall]]'s. But, to take it seriously for a moment: People, Wikipedia is editable by anyone. If you are doing serious work, follow through the citations, and decide which are from upstanding sources, and which are just people writing on their blog, and which are people writing on their blog who know what they are talking about.

The title of the comic is a play on the word [http://www.merriam-webster.com/medical/cytogenesis cytogenesis]. Cytogenesis is the formation of cells and their development. Citogenesis, on the other hand is a [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/portmanteau portmanteau] of 'Citation' and 'Genesis'. [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/citation Citation] meaning quoting a source. [http://mw1.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/genesis?show=1&t=1346949206 Genesis] being the origin of something. So, citogenesis would be the creation of a quote that can be used to back-up a fact or statement.

The comic is discussing citogenesis occurring on Wikipedia. {{w|Wikipedia}} is a free and freely editable encyclopedia that aims to become the most complete and correct knowledge base available, in all languages, to all people. Wikipedia is managed by the {{w|Wikimedia Foundation}} who publish {{w|MediaWiki}}, a web-based {{w|wiki}} engine written in {{w|PHP}}. The explain xkcd wiki is run on a MediaWiki server.

Following this comic, the actual {{w|Scroll lock}} and {{w|Steven Chu}} articles {{w|Talk:Scroll_lock#Thanks_Randall|were both}} {{w|Talk:Steven_Chu#Scroll_lock_key|wiki-bombed}} by "helpful" editors trying to enforce Randall's reality on the Internets. The Wikipedia article on {{w|Citogensis}} redirects to the {{w|Reliability of Wikipedia#Information loop|information loop}} section on the article "Reliability of Wikipedia". That section ends with crediting the term to "citogenesis" to "webcomic artist Randall Munroe", with a link to this comic.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.61|108.162.215.61]] 02:06, 2 March 2014 (UTC)

==Transcript==
:Where Citations Come From:
:Citogenesis Step #1
:Through a convoluted process, a user's brain generates facts. These are typed into Wikipedia.
:[A guy with short hair sits at a desk, typing on a laptop.]
:Guy: (typing) The "scroll lock" key was was designed by future Energy Secretary Steven Chu in a college project.

:A rushed writer checks Wikipedia for a summary of their subject.
:[Ponytail sits at a desk, typing on a desktop.]
:Ponytail: (typing) US Energy Secretary Steven Chu, (Nobel Prizewinner and creator of the ubiquitous "scroll lock" key) testified before Congress today...
:Step #2

:Surprised readers check Wikipedia, see the claim, and flag it for review. A passing editor finds the piece and adds it as a citation.
:[Cueball sits on a couch with a laptop in his lap, typing.]
:Cueball: Google is your friend, people. (typing) <nowiki><ref>{{cite web|url=</nowiki>
:Step #3

:Step #4
:Now that other writers have a real source, they repeat the fact.
:[A flow chart, with "Wikipedia citation" in the center. The word "Wikipedia" is in black, the word "citations" is white with a red background.
:A black arrow leads from "brain" to "Wikipedia."
:A black arrow labeled "words" leads from "Wikipedia" to "careless writers," and a red arrow labeled "citations" leads back to "Wikipedia citations."
:A black & red arrow leads from "Wikipedia" to "cited facts" which leads to "slightly more careful writers," which leads to "more citations," which leads back to :"Wikipedia" (all black & red arrows).]
:References proliferate, completing the citogenesis process.

==Trivia==
*We will probably never know the book or author Randall mentions in the title text, but there is a nice similar story about the former German minister {{w|Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg}}. His complete name contains fifteen names/words and reads: '''Karl-Theodor Maria Nikolaus Johann Jacob Philipp Franz Joseph Sylvester Freiherr von und zu Guttenberg'''. An anonymous user added one more ('''Wilhelm''') to the German Wikipedia, just the evening before Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg was presented as the new Federal Minister of Economics and Technology on February 10, 2009. The next day many major German newspapers published this wrong name ([http://translate.google.com/translate?sl=de&tl=en&js=n&prev=_t&hl=en&ie=UTF-8&layout=2&eotf=1&u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bildblog.de%2F5704%2Fwie-ich-freiherr-von-guttenberg-zu-wilhelm-machte%2F translation of bildblog.de]). But the joke doesn't stop there, because that minister was later found guilty of plagiarism, which resulted in the revocation of his doctorate and eventually his resignation as Minister of Defence, on March 1, 2011.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]

Talk:1283: Headlines

2014-02-22T19:21:55Z

108.162.215.61: :The Challenger was in January. Chernobyl was in April. No one watching the Challenger launch was sick from Chernobyl, because it hadn't happened yet.~~~~

"1912 is, of course, the year of the the sinking of the RMS Titanic."
I don't think this is such a given fact that people know when the Titanic sank. I'm removing the "of course". And someone should add an explanation for how these titles are supposed to get more clicks, and what "getting more clicks" even means or worth.
I'd do it myself, but I'm on my phone... on second thought, let me boot my laptop... [[Special:Contributions/95.35.58.162|95.35.58.162]] 06:31, 28 October 2013 (UTC)
: Okay, I added a short explanation for now. Someone should fix it, add mentions to NSFW photo articles and list articles (5 easy ways to add 10 years to your life expectancy!). I'm out. [[Special:Contributions/95.35.58.162|95.35.58.162]] 07:10, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

Don’t you think the 1916 headline is a reference to the fatness of someone’s mom? [[User:Quoti|Quoti]] ([[User talk:Quoti|talk]]) 07:28, 28 October 2013 (UTC)
: fat mom (married to physicist dad?) and gravity: [[89|Gravitational Mass]]. Perhaps he found pictures of her down in the gravity well? What do you think? [[Special:Contributions/195.37.42.200|195.37.42.200]] 16:20, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

Surely "1916 :'PHYSICIST DAD' TURNS HIS ATTENTION TO GRAVITY" is a second reference to Einstein?[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Relativity:_The_Special_and_the_General_Theory]
[[User:Wwoods|Wwoods]] ([[User talk:Wwoods|talk]]) 07:47, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

"1986 - This video of a terminally ill child watching the Challenger launch will break your heart" - Probably has something to do with the Chernobyl nuclear meltdown as well? {{unsigned ip|212.123.0.8}}
:I don't think so. The child is probably American. [[User:Xhfz|Xhfz]] ([[User talk:Xhfz|talk]]) 12:38, 28 October 2013 (UTC)
:The Challenger was in January. Chernobyl was in April. No one watching the Challenger launch was sick from Chernobyl, because it hadn't happened yet.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.215.61|108.162.215.61]] 19:21, 22 February 2014 (UTC)

"Jan 1st 1990: 500 signs you're a 90s kid" - Can somebody explain this one? This is the only one I, and so far explainxkcd, cannot link to a specific historical event. Or is this supposed to be an example of an attention grabbing headline on a day nothing happened?--[[Special:Contributions/108.17.2.71|108.17.2.71]] 13:05, 28 October 2013 (UTC)
: I think it is making fun of sensational news - making news out of nothing. Here, on the very first day of the 90's, the newspapers already have 500 signs that you are a 90's kid. But nothing has actually happened so far. [[User:Sayno2quat|Sayno2quat]] ([[User talk:Sayno2quat|talk]]) 13:16, 28 October 2013 (UTC)
:: Alternatively, it can be written as, "20 signs you're a 70s kid" [[Special:Contributions/108.162.212.200|108.162.212.200]] 15:54, 5 November 2013 (UTC)

I changed the line about the 1929 crash being "the largest stock market crash in history" to "the most devastating stock market crash", as it wasn't the largest. By points, it's not even worth mentioning. By percentage (which is more important anyway), it ranks second to the 1987 crash. In 1929, the crash was 13% in one day, and 24% over two days. The 1987 crash was 22% in one day, and 30% over five days. [[User:JamesCurran|JamesCurran]] ([[User talk:JamesCurran|talk]]) 15:55, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

:And by sticking to the formula "the most (something) in (something)" you are inadvertently falling into the sensationalist language this cartoon mocks. (At least with checked facts) [[Special:Contributions/173.245.53.110|173.245.53.110]] 14:26, 30 October 2013 (UTC)

"1969 - Last peek at Naked Singularities. [NSFW]" --FbFree --[[Special:Contributions/128.135.70.205|128.135.70.205]] 15:59, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

This seems like a subtle dig at Cracked.com [[Special:Contributions/76.79.82.50|76.79.82.50]] 17:28, 28 October 2013 (UTC)
: And Buzzfeed and Huffington Post and so on... (And not so subtle.) --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 17:47, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

John Gordon Mein, the United States Ambassador to Guatemala, were also assassinated in 1968. he was "the first United States ambassador to be assassinated while serving in office". --[[User:Valepert|valepert]] ([[User talk:Valepert|talk]]) 18:14, 28 October 2013 (UTC)

Am I the only one who wants to read these articles? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.117|108.162.246.117]] 04:04, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

Kennedy was assassinated in 1963, not '68. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assassination_of_John_F._Kennedy [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.197|173.245.52.197]] 17:45, 24 November 2013 (UTC)
:Please don't mix up {{w|Robert F. Kennedy}} with {{w|John Fitzgerald Kennedy}} (JFK). I did revert your edit.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 19:53, 24 November 2013 (UTC)
::And just for some more understanding: 1968 has been the most terrible year for the United States. {{w|Martin Luther King Jr.}} was assassinated far after {{w|Lyndon B. Johnson|LBJ}} did sign the {{w|Civil Rights Act of 1964}} originally proposed by JFK. Robert F. Kennedy was assassinated while he was running as a candidate for the {{w|Democratic Party (United States)}} for the 1968 President election. Massive student protest did occur at that year, mainly caused by the {{w|Vietnam War}}. That year was a horror for every US citizen, and even more.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:20, 24 November 2013 (UTC)

I saw this in Reader's Digest, specifically (named by date): 1912, 1920, 1928, 1929, 1948, 1969, and 1989. I just found this yesterday. --[[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.85|173.245.56.85]] 23:46, 12 February 2014 (UTC)