explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1193: Externalities

2019-12-19T04:36:27Z

162.158.255.220: /* Explanation */ grammatical error fix - break to breaking

{{comic
| number = 1193
| date = April 1, 2013
| title = Externalities
| image = externalities.png
| titletext = Mouse over words and things to see where they come from.
}}
{{incomplete|While a good start with the explanation of Baidu, the article should give an explanation of the comic in its current state. The different versions during the competition should be its own section. Also, update image to include text.}}
{{TOC}}
==Explanation==
This was the fourth [[:Category:April fools' comics|April fools' comic]] released by [[Randall]]. The previous fools comic was
[[1037: Umwelt]] from Sunday April 1st 2012. The next was [[1350: Lorenz]] released on Tuesday April 1st 2014.

This comic isn't a static image - even the title text changes depending on which part of the image you're hovering over. It presented a competition for students to see who could come closest to breaking a {{w|Skein (hash function)|Skein hash}} but also an aid appeal for the Wikimedia Foundation.

There are quite a few references in the comic to {{w|Baidu}}. Baidu is a large Chinese Internet services company that employs thousands, whose shares are publicly traded on world stock exchanges. It's the predominant Internet search provider of China, and is sometimes called the "Google of China". It offers parallels for the Chinese market of many of the services that Google provides and offers its own encyclopedic wiki with a restricted edit policy to serve as a replacement for Wikipedia. Wikipedia reports that Baidu's search engine handled 56% of Chinese internet search queries in Q4 2010. and that in October 2012, Baidu ranked 5th overall in the Alexa Internet rankings. Given that explanation for the Baidu references in #1193 is still solicited for explainxkcd, Baidu apparently is not well known yet among savvy XKCD readers.
Baidu Search results reputedly follow the censorship dictates of the Chinese authorities, causing it to return censored responses to searches for politically sensitive terms like "Tianamen Square massacre" or "Falun Gong" when executed by web browsers that are connected via Chinese ISPs. When you execute such searches via Baidu in the US, the top links returned for these topics do seem to reflect Chinese government sensibilities although the uncensored English language Wikipedia articles for these topics are listed high in the query results. Baidu's reputation for censorship provides background for Megan's reply "but nothing about Tianamen Square" in response to the "Come and find your future at Baidu" employment enticement of panel one and also provides the background to understand the "It takes great minds to stifle other great minds" slogan of the second panel.

The blank regions in the above image are dynamically generated from various sources.
*The university that is being recruited changes depending on which university is winning the hash finding competition in the fifth panel.
*The company doing the recruiting is randomly selected from a pool of companies. It was formerly the first NASDAQ-100 company mentioned on a varying Wikipedia page.
*The text in the second panel may vary: See [[1193: Externalities#Second Panel|this section]].
*The text in the third panel may vary: See [[1193: Externalities#Third Panel|this section]].
*The text in the fourth panel may vary: See [[1193: Externalities#Fourth Panel|this section]].
*The text in the fifth panel [[1193: Externalities#Fifth Panel|changes]], depending on which university is currently in third place in a hash finding competition. Clicking on the panel takes you to [http://almamater.xkcd.com/ a webpage] where people can enter their school's domain name and hash data, and ranks schools on how close their students can come to matching a Skein 1024 1024 hash value.
*The text in the top half of the sixth panel may vary. See [[1193: Externalities#Sixth Panel|this section]]. The second half of the panel is always the same.
*The last panel varies with the amount donated to the Wikimedia Foundation via [https://donate.wikimedia.org/?utm_medium=socialmedia&utm_campaign=xkcd_april1 this link]. For past images, see [[1193: Externalities#Seventh Panel|this section]].

===Hashing Competition===
For the two days until comic 1194 appeared, a competition was underway to see who could come closest to breaking a {{w|Skein (hash function)|Skein hash}}. The first text line of the first panel contains a link to http://almamater.xkcd.com. This page contained the text:

:Currently looking for Skein 1024 1024 input matching
<pre>5b4da95f5fa08280fc9879df44f418c8f9f12ba424b7757de02bbdfbae0d4c4fdf9317c80cc5fe04c6429073466cf29706b8c25999ddd2f6540d4475cc977b87f4757be023f19b8f4035d7722886b78869826de916a79cf9c94cc79cd4347d24b567aa3e2390a573a373a48a5e676640c79cc70197e1c5e7f902fb53ca1858b6</pre>

On this page, users were invited to enter "Your school's domain name" — presumably intended to be their college alma mater. (At least in the beginning, only a few top-level domains were accepted.) If the user entered an acceptable domain (by xkcd's rules, which apparently changed during the 48 hours of the competition), they could then enter data values one at a time. For each data value entered, xkcd returned a hash value and the number of bits by which it differed from the target value. The object was to achieve the lowest possible number of differing bits, ideally zero.

A ranking page showed the lowest value achieved for each domain name entered, but not the data that achieved it. The first name on the list was substituted in various panels, and the third-place school showed in panel five. No data values were reported by xkcd, but various results were posted by users of the xkcd forums and on other websites, leading to copycat submissions, so that occasionally large numbers of institutions would show the same moderately low value.

After the end of the contest, the data submission page vanished, replaced by the final list of rankings, which shows that Carnegie Mellon University achieved the best score with 384 bits incorrect out of 1024. The rankings only show a few hundred out of the several thousand domains submitted—presumably Randall chose to chop the copycat submissions off the end of the list, retaining only honestly obtained results.

===First Panel===
In some cases, Megan's reply seems to correspond to the company.
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you applied to [company] yet?
:Megan: The recruiter hasn't emailed me back in over three minutes.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you applied to [company] yet?
:Megan: The recruiter hasn't emailed me back in over an hour!
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: I'm not that good at math.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: What do they even do?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: I don't like monopolies.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: Only in my darkest moments.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Be part of the Apple experience!
:Megan: I'm not really a fan of turtlenecks.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work at Microsoft!
:Megan: I only came to this tech talk for the xbox giveaway.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Y U No Work Yahoo?
:Megan: I like working from home!
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Become a partner at Starbucks!
:Megan: But green's not my colour.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work in the Amazon!
:Megan: I don't have to actually move to South America, do I?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: Not after that presentation.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Thought about working for Intel?
:Megan: I'm not that great at division.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Dude, you should work at Dell!
:Megan: That catchphrase is so old.
|-
|
:Ahoy, carnegie melonites!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: Not after that presentation.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you looked for a job at Kraft Foods?
:Megan: I'm allergic to sugar
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:How about working for Whole Foods?
:Megan: Could I afford the food if I did?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work at EBay!
:Megan: Maybe if they made a good bid.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work for Activision... er... Blizzard... er...
:Megan: Activision Blizzard?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students! <nowiki>|</nowiki> Ahoy. Carnegie Melonites!
:Come find your future at Baidu!
:Megan: But nothing about Tiananmen Square.
|}

===Second Panel===
The text in the second panel is based on the company in the first panel:
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:When the Singularity happens, it will happen here.
:Ponytail: [Company] has outgrown us.
:Men: It is time.
|-
|
:Think of ways to make things smaller and smaller!
:Ponytail: I'm worried mine is too big.
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:Think of ways to make things smaller and smaller!
:Ponytail: But will it blend?
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:You'll be part of a dynamic research team envisioning the future.
:Ponytail: It probably looks cool.
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:You'll be creating the future of commerce platforms!
:Ponytail: More recommendations.
:Men: Yep.
|-
|
:You'll be an insignificant cog in our giant machine
:Ponytail: We should improve Notepad
:Men: Nah
|-
|
:We can't tell you what you'll be working on.
:Ponytail: [Confidential]
:Men: [Redacted]
|-
|
:You'll be an insignificant cog in our giant machine
:Ponytail: Needs more Bob.
:Men: Nah
|-
|
:You'll help set the future of the company
:Ponytail: Wait. You hired a college grad as the CFO?
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:At Qualcomm, we know you're born mobile.
:Ponytail: Born mobile!
:Men: Texting!
|-
|
:Short or tall, we've got a grande job for you!
:Ponytail: How many job openings are there?
:Men: Ele-venti or so.
|-
|
:You'll help direct the future of nutrition
:Ponytail: Microwaveable toast
:Men: Delicious
|-
|
:Help us find and provide the best healthy, local, and sustainable products.
:Ponytail: Hey guys, how about kale cookies?
:Men: Sounds great!
|-
|
:We're the Classmates.com to Facebook's Craigslist.
:Ponytail: Maybe we should use game theory.
:Men: Why Bother?
|-
|
:Whatever. Come create the future of gaming!
:Ponytail: Call of Duty 14.
:Men: That's genius!
|-
|
:It takes great minds to stifle other great minds.
:Ponytail: Let's block Canada
:Men: Sounds good.
|}

===Third Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:We're a convenient four hour drive from New York City (15,000 hours by Roomba)
|-
|
:Only a short commuter flight away!
|-
|
:Travel to us by Roomba, we're *that* close!
|-
|
:We're so close you can get to us by Roomba.
|-
|
:Free Roomba rides every morning while you have coffee.
|-
|
:Your Roomba comes in black & slate, or white & silver
|-
|
:Just a short Roomba ride up the coast, try not to fall off.
|-
|
:We know what everyday life is like for your generation:
|}

===Fourth Panel===
{| class="wikitable sortable plainlinks table-padding"
|-
|
:Our recruiting team is on the lookup for promising young [university] graduates.
|-
|
:We hired a new recruiting startup to help us hire [university] students.
|-
|
:We borrowed the botanical gardens' net to catch promising recruits.
|-
|
:We prefer to recruit from [university] students, of course.
|-
|
:Our recruiters are on the hunt for unaware [university] graduates.
|}

===Fifth Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:Or students from [university], if they're clever with their applications
|-
|
:Possibly [university] grads, if their form-filling startup works out.
|-
|
:Or [university] graduates, provided any of them manage to fill out the application correctly.
|-
|
:Or [university] graduates, if they manage to fill out the application correctly.
|}

The text in the form varies independently of the text at the top, sometimes related to the organization in 3rd place:

{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
!Organization
!Name
!Email
!Education
!(Explanation)
|-
|MIT
|Oliver Smoot
|pgp encrypted
|have you ever really looked at the fourier
|As an undergrad at MIT in 1948, Smoot was used to measure the Harvard Bridge during a fraternity prank. This led to the introduction of [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smoot "smoot"] as an unusual unit of length.
|-
|
|Wheeeee
|ford.com
|stealing lunches from startups
|-
|CMU
|leeroy jenkins
|me@car
|I can cut up melons
| Le(e)roy Jenkins is an internet meme originating from a 2006 'Let's Play' video of World of Warcraft
|-
|CMU
|pittsburgh
|me@car
|I can cut up melons
|-
|
|SEGMENTATION FAULT
|save trees
|Contra dancing.
|-
|Cambridge
|I'm applying
|cam.gov
|on going problems with birds
|-
|
|certainly
|elephant
|An excellent year in the Sahara
|-
|Stanford
|Stanford
|ford.com
|Stealing lunches from startups
|-
|Stanford
|Yes Please
|@twitter
|Are you Stanford?
|-
|
|Applying
|For a job
|I would like to work at you
|-
|St.Olaf
|Me olaf
|You Helga
|Hunting wooly mammoths
|-
|Ohio State
|Oh!
|IO
|O HAI O
| A joke on the pronunciation of Ohio.
|-
|
|FOLLOWBACK
|TOTALLY.EDU.US
|CONVENIENT US DOMAIN REDIRECTS
| .edu is a website suffix mostly used for (American) university websites.
|-
|
|Mancher
|Outlook
|Made a collage out of macaroni
|-
|Stanford
|Yes Please
|ford.com
|Are you Stanford?
|-
|Michigan
|ANN
|SOUTH DETROIT
|HUNT LIKE A WOLVERINE
|University of Michigan is in Ann Arbor; the mascot is the Wolverine
|-
|
|christopher
|POBox 12532
|p.s. ill find my frog
|PO Box 12532 is located at Pyramid Lake in Nevada.
|-
|Oxford
|Bond, James
|Righto
|We're better than Cambridge
|-
|
|Which one
|Forget it
|Riding the L all night long
|-
|Kit
|Kat
|Oh dear
|Something something sleep
|-
|Google
|My G+ handle?
|Any
|I'm feeling lucky
|G+ stands for Google+, Googles social network. I'm feeling lucky is the second option under the searchbar on Google.
|-
|UIC
|Which one
|Forget it
|Riding the L all night long
|Presumably University of Illinois at Chicago. "Which one" could be a reference to other institutions with the same initials, or people who confuse "UIC" with "U of C" (University of Chicago, a different institution altogether). The rapid transit system in Chicago is called the 'L'.
|-
|MY JOB NOW
|@
|SAVE DOCUMENT AND SEND
| Could be Randall saying most jobs are just sending e-mails (@).
|}

===Sixth Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:At [company], you'll work at a scale you won't find anywhere else
|-
|
:Explore the depths of expensive and undocumented tools!
|-
|
:At Apple, we believe in pushing the boundary of perfection.
|-
|
:At Microsoft, you just need to relax and embrace the machine
|-
|
:Yahoo management aren't just suits. We code too!
|-
|
:At [company], you'll have the opportunity to work on cutting-edge projects.
|-
|
:At Amazon, you'll be shaving the most cutting-edge of yaks.
|-
|
:You get to bid first on any auction, and use other experimental tools!
|-
|
:At QUALCOMM, Device driver code quality is job #1
|-
|
:Make use of our powerful in-house game creation tools.
|-
|
:We're even working on some experimental biotechnology
|}

===Seventh Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|[[File:externality-dog1.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog2.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog2A.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog3.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog4.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog5.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog6.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog7.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog8.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog9.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog10.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog12.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog13.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog14.png]]
|}

===Title Text===
The title text documents the different sources of data in the comic. The different title texts are:

{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
!Comic region
!Title text
|-
|Most of the comic, during the competition.||Mouse over words and things to see where they come from.
|-
|Most of the comic, after the competition ended||This comic went up on April 1st, and the panels changed throughout the day in response to readers doing things like breaking hashes, edited a rapidly-shuffling set of target Wikipedia articles, and donating to Wikimedia Foundation. (The vandalism is over now and CMU won the hashing contest.)
|-
|The part of the first panel (text and drawing) which is not a link. There is no title text at all over the part where the link is active||Happy April 1st, Everyone!
|-
|Fifth panel.||[University] has the third best hash. See the full standings at http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv (University = uic after competition)
|-
|Last three panels (only within a frame that would just fit around all three of them).||The dog gains a pound for every $10 donated to the wikimedia foundation via this link. Currently at [amount donated] (Amount = $51135.33 after competition).
|}

==Transcript==
:[This was a dynamic image where the text changed during April 1st. The main title text also changed after the dynamic part was finished, and there are even different title text for different part of the comic. This transcript is of the final version of the comic, (no longer dynamic or changing), as displayed at present on xkcd, there are still four different title texts for specific panels. These four title text are for that reason included here in the transcript.]

:[The basic title text for the entire comic is: "This comic went up on April 1st, and the panels changed throughout the day in response to readers doing things like breaking hashes, edited a rapidly-shuffling set of target Wikipedia articles, and donating to Wikimedia Foundation. (The vandalism is over now and CMU won the hashing contest.)" The other three title text are only active over certain panels.]

:[The first panel with the caption and Megan below has it's own title text. A part of that panel is a link, and in the section where this link is active there is no title text at all. The title text for the rest of the first panel is: "Happy April 1st, everyone!"]

:[A panel with only text is above the first drawing. There is a link on the top part of the text to <nowiki>http://almamater.xkcd.com/</nowiki> (the link is now broken).]
:Ahoy, carnegie melonites!
:
:Come find your future at Baidu.

:[Below, not in a frame, is Megan.]
:Megan: But nothing about Tiananmen Square.

:[Caption floating above the frame of the next panel:]
:It takes great minds to stifle other great minds.
:[Ponytail sits at a desk, hand to her chin, with two Cueball-like guys with their hands on the table.]
:Ponytail: Let's block Canada
:Cueball-like guys: Sounds good.

:[Ponytail crouches on a moving Roomba (labeled) with a steaming mug of coffee in one hand and a smartphone in the other. Above her is a caption. The Roomba makes a noice]
:We're a convenient four hour drive from New York City (15,000 hours by Roomba.)
:''Whirrrrrrr''
:Roomba

:[Ponytail and Hairy corners Cueball as he walks out of a door, and a black haired ponytailed girl is moving towards him wielding a giant butterfly net. There is a caption above them:]
:Our recruiters are on the hunt for unaware CMU graduates

:[The fifth panel has it's own title text only active within (or very close to) the frame. It is: "uic has the third best hash. See the full standings at <nowiki>http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv</nowiki>" (The link is now broken)]

:[There is a caption above a website application. There is three fields to be filled, with each their caption and text:]
:or uic graduates, provied any of them manage to fill out the application correctly.
::Name which one
::Email forget it
::Education Riding the L all night long

:[Caption floating above the frame of the next panel:]
:At Baidu, Inc., you'll have the opportunity to work on cutting-edge projects.
:[Cueball sits at a computer.]
:Cueball: What does "make dog" do?
:Off-screen voice: Experimental dog generator. Don't click on it; the default size isn't set, so-
:'''*click*'''

:[The last three panels has their own title text, only active within a frame that could contain all three panel. Outside that "frame" (all the way around) is the other title text. Within the title text is: "The dog gains a pound for every $10 donated to the Wikimedia Foundation via this link. Currently at $51135.33."]

:[Small insert panel, going in above the next larger panel: Cueball stares at the screen.]
:''Kzzzt''
:''*bip*''
:Off-screen voice: Uh oh.

:[A giant dog looks down at the desk where the computer once was, now only the wires are left. Cueball, leaning way back in his office chair, holding his hand to his mouth, stares up at it.]

:[Again a smaller insert panel above the large one with the dog. A graphic showing two sliders and a dog (similar to the one in the previous panel). Next to the dog with arrows pointing to it are a thermometer graphic and an equation. Below is an e-mail type text and finally a caption. There are arrows over and under "God" and "dogs" between the g and d's.]
:d(x)=R
:careers@baidu, Inc.
:'''Play God with dogs.'''TM

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:April fools' comics]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Science]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Roomba]]
[[Category:Butterfly net]]
[[Category:Singularity]]

2172: Lunar Cycles

2019-07-07T09:07:02Z

162.158.255.220: /* Explanation */ wikipedia:Slim-fit pants

{{comic
| number = 2172
| date = July 5, 2019
| title = Lunar Cycles
| image = lunar_cycles.png
| titletext = The Antikythera mechanism had a whole set of gears specifically to track the cyclic popularity of skinny jeans and low-rise waists.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a MOONBOT. Joke cycle explanations need to be expanded and title text needs to be explained. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic shows a mixture of real, scientific lunar cycles and cycles that are comedic or fictional in nature.

*'''Nodal precession:''' The Moon's orbital plane is tilted slightly compared to the Earth's orbital plane around the sun (the {{w|ecliptic}}). This tilt is why we don't constantly see eclipses; most of the time, the Moon's orbital plane is tilted higher or lower than the Sun, so they generally don't cross each other. The two points at which these planes ''do'' cross are called {{w|lunar nodes}}. {{w|Nodal precession}} is the gradual rotation of these nodes over time, which for the Moon follows an 18.6 year cycle.

*'''Apsidal precession:''' All orbits have two points where the orbiting body is either closest to, or furthest away from, the thing they are orbiting. These points are called {{w|apsides}}, and the imaginary line between them is called the ''line of apsides''. {{w|Apsidal precession}} is the gradual rotation of this line over time, which occurs in cycles of around 8.9 years for the Moon.

*'''Phase:''' {{w|Lunar phase}} describes the change in shape of the sunlit side of the Moon as viewed from the Earth's surface, which is caused by the changing angle between Moon and Sun as the Moon revolves around the Earth. The cycle of lunar phases takes 29.5 days, a figure referred to as the ''synodic month''.

*'''Distance:''' Because the Moon's orbit around the Earth is elliptical, its distance from the Earth varies slightly over the course of an orbit. This means that the moon's distance also follows a cycle which is the same as the length of one lunar orbit: approximately 27.5 days. This figure is referred to as the ''sidereal month''. Note that the synodic month is (perhaps counterintuituvely) two days ''longer'' than the sidereal month - or to put it another way, it takes 2 more days for the Moon's phases to cycle than it does for the Moon to go around the Earth. This is due to the fact that the Earth is also moving ''around'' the Sun while the phases are going on, which means that the Moon has to spend 2 extra days "catching up" to the point at which the lunar phase cycle can restart.

*'''Earth-Moon relative size''': This is a joke cycle; the Earth and Moon do not change size, nor does the Moon ever become larger than the Earth. This may be playing on the idea that the Moon often ''appears'' to change size due to a various factors; most commonly, this is due to the {{w|Moon illusion}}, which tricks the brain into perceiving the Moon as much larger than it really is. There are also so-called {{w|supermoon}}s, which occur when the full moon coincides with the Moon's closest approach to Earth; these actually ''do'' increase the Moon's apparent size, although by a relatively insignificant amount.

*'''Lunar shape:''' Again, this is a joke cycle; the Moon does not actually change shape. A shape intermediate between circle and square is known as a {{w|squircle}}, a subclass of the {{w|superellipse}}.

*'''Lunar mood:''' The moon does not have a mood, although humans can have moods that fluctuate over time, sometimes with a regularity akin to a cycle. Ironically, the section of the graph that shows a good (i.e. happy) mood has the graph line curving up then down like the mouth of a frown, and for the bad (unhappy) mood it curves down and then up, as in the mouth of a smile.

* The final diagram shows many different cycles superimposed on each other, highlighting areas where several cycles are coinciding. This is likely satirizing the media trend of overhyping astronomical coincidences and giving them grand-sounding names (which get longer and more impressive the more cycles are coinciding).
**'''Supermoon:''' see [[1394:_Superm*n]].
**Two-week window in which astrology works. {{w|Astrology}} is a pseudoscience which claims that the positions of the celestial bodies can be used to predict human affairs. This is a joke on how astrology does not actually work but occasionally seems to by coincidence.
**A [[wikipedia:harvest moon|harvest moon]] is full moon closest to the autumnal equinox, possibly orange.
**The [[wikipedia:Golden Age of Television|Golden Age of Television]] is said to have occurred in the 1940s and 50s, and the 2000s.
**A [[wikipedia:blue moon|blue moon]] is the extra full moon in years with 13 full moons. An event that occurs once every two or three years. Blue moons don't look any different from regular full moons.
**There are no occurrences of '''super blood moon''', '''dire moon''' or '''pork moon''' in the Google Books N-Gram viewer, which includes many works from the 1800s through 2008. A [[wikipedia:blood moon|blood moon]] refers to the moon during a lunar eclipse.
**While the popularity of '''skinny jeans''' ([[wikipedia:Slim-fit pants|slim-fit pants]]) does change over time, the idea that this is connected to a lunar cycle is also a joke.
*The '''{{w|Antikythera_mechanism|Antikythera mechanism}}''' mentioned in the title text is an ancient Greek machine, rediscovered in 1901, designed to calculate astronomical positions. The title text jokes that there is a set of gears on said mechanism that is used to predict the popularity of "skinny jeans" and "low-rise waists."

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:Understanding lunar cycles

:Nodal precession
:[A diagram showing a broad cosine-like wave with wavelength labelled as 18.6 years. To the right are two diagrams showing an orbital cycle moving in and out of plane.]

:Apsidal precession
:[A diagram similar to the one above but with a slightly shorter wavelength, labelled as 8.9 years. To the right are two diagrams showing an elliptical orbit around a planet and the same orbit rotated.]

:Phase
:[A diagram similar to those above with a shorter wavelength, labelled as 29.5 days. To the right is a diagram showing four phases of the moon: New, Waxing crescent, Waxinf gibbos, Full.]

:Distance
:[A diagram similar to those above with a shorter wavelength, labelled as 27.5 days. To the right is a diagram showing the distance of the moon from the Earth over time, with distances marked by arrows.]

:Earth-Moon relative size
:[A wave with long wavelength with an arrow pointing to the minimum labelled 'Earth bigger' and an arrow pointing to the maximum labelled 'Moon bigger'. To the right are two diagrams of the moon and Earth, one showing the Earth bigger than the Moon and the other showing the Moon bigger than the Earth.]

:Lunar shape
:[A wave with long wavelength with an arrow pointing to the minimum labelled 'Circle' and an arrow pointing to the maximum labelled 'Square'. To the right is a diagram showing a circle, a circle transforming into a square with outward arrows at each corner and a square transforming into a circle with inward arrows.]

:Lunar mood
:[A wave with long wavelength with an arrow pointing to the minimum labelled 'Bad' and an arrow pointing to the maximum labelled 'Good'. To the right are four emojis: :), :|, :(, :|]

:[A superimposed graph of all the above waves. Different points on the graph are labelled: Harvest moon, Supermoon, Blue moon, Skinny Jeans popular, Super blood moon, Golden age of TV, Dire moon, Pork moon, Two week window in which astrology works, Total eclipse of the sea.]

{{comic discussion}}

Talk:1586: Keyboard Problems

2017-06-06T19:36:10Z

162.158.255.220: fghgdfsasgfssdgfsdfgsdfgdfsgsdfsdgsdfsdgfdg

FUCK ALL OF YOU!!!BA8

1256: Questions

2017-01-12T08:38:37Z

162.158.255.220: /* Section Owl Nine */

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}
A larger version of the picture can be found in http://xkcd.com/1256/large/.
==Explanation==
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon". All these questions and many more (33,171 in total) can be found in http://xkcd.com/why.txt.

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
The tables below have been created so as to split the comic into almost entirely arbitrary blocks, which have then been identified with similarly arbitrary numbers. As a general rule, section numbers work top to bottom, then right to left.
===Illustrated Panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||Arms stop growing because longer arms would not be a very useful way to spend resources. Human DNA has programmed the body to gradually ossify (turn to bone) the growing arms and legs, closing the {{w|epiphyseal plate}} (the flat plate at the end of each long bone), at which point they stop growing. Alternately, the muscles of the arm, which may have been the intended subject of the question, may fail to grow if not exercised with appropriate resistance, repetition or frequency; if nutrition is insufficient; if insufficient recovery time is given; or if sufficient levels of certain hormones like growth hormone or testosterone are not present.
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||There is no hard evidence of ghosts.
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||Squirrels are the product of a long sequence of evolution, like any other animal. They persist because they effectively reproduce and compete for resources within their niche, but they are also the product of many circumstantial events that has led to them being the way they are.
|-
|Why is sex so important?||Sex is important biologically because it is the primary method of reproduction in many different species, and culturally because it both plays an important role in human relationship and causes hard-to-control urges that affect behaviour. However, it can be of varying importance to different people (see [http://www.asexuality.org/home/?q=overview.html asexuality]).
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe {{w|guns}} do exist and are mentioned at the beginning of {{w|Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban}} when the news gives a warning that Sirius Black has one. Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns; a revolver can't shoot lightning, summon items or teleport its user. Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his Muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is set in the United Kingdom (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}

===Section One===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? || Partly to get air, partly because it's an effective way to catch prey near the surface, and partly because they just seem to find it fun - it's like going into outer space!
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?|| Often, these are used by couples to view themselves during coitus.
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field, although they can be useful in fields for grazing animals, since they provide shade.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company. However, if Game Freak were to develop a Pokémon MMO the MMOs would be strong competition against the console games and therefore reducing the Pokémon demographic significantly. The mobile app {{w|Pokémon Go}} has since partly filled the MMO niche, with multiplayer interactivity through item drops and fighting at gyms.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?|| Highway/freeway {{w|noise barrier|noise barriers}} sometimes have doors in them to allow workers access to both sides of the barrier.
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?|| To add atmosphere and to give players hints when there is a dark cave nearby. See [http://minecraft.gamepedia.com/Ambience Minecraft Wiki].
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||There are certain people who are more respected and well-known than other people, whether it be because of their acting career, major advancements to science, or a sex tape.
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being venomous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||{{w|pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}. {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||An old folk remedy for {{w|gonorrhea}} was to clap on the sides of the penis.
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?|| The question relates to the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?" However, they most likely remain "friends" because they are in the same class at school and are therefore "forced" to be around one another.
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||{{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters|Aang}} is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||This likely refers to imessage chat being blue. These messages are blue when sending a message to another apple device. When sent as an SMS message, they will be green.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||Because some people buy them. Mustaches, especially handlebar-style mustaches, were a popular fad at the time of this comic.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||Fuzzy pink mustaches are used to designate cars in the {{w|Lyft}} service.
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||See {{w|Movember}}
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||There are an estimated [http://oh.audubon.org/bsc/SOTB.html 400 bird species] in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_birds_of_Ohio Ohio], but there are [http://www.jstor.org/discover/2419997sid=21104910103541&uid=4&uid=3739776&uid=2&uid=3739256 2.74 nesting pairs per acre].
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?|| {{w|lake_effect|Lake-effect}} rain develops in the same manner as lake-effect snow.
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section Two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?|| In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them. An alternative hypothesis is that they want to hug/touch their loved ones one last time.
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||Blood moves through veins due to irregular pressure from skeletal muscles combined with valves to control direction. In varicose veins these valves malfunction affecting blood flow. In arteries blood flow is produced directly from pressure caused by the heart.
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?|| {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||Programming is the art of writing instructions for a computer to do. Since the computer has a limited set of instructions for you to use it involves a new way of thinking for many. It is also hard because the computer itself is not smart or adaptable to unexpected problems. For instance when a human is told to sort books in a shelf, he or she can do that despite there might be things in the way (he or she will just move it to the side). A computer will generally just crash if it doesn't have instructions on how to deal with the unexcepted problem.
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?|| A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, Wikipedia's {{w|Zero-ohm link}} article gives sufficient explanation.
|-
|Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||The brain enjoys repetition especially in music.
|-
|Why do trees die?||Some common reasons include lack of water, lack of nitrogen in the soil and being chopped down.
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||Some stations broadcast a {{w|second audio program}}, an alternative sound track that your TV can be configured to use instead of the primary program. This is intended to be used for broadcasting in an alternate language, or for {{w|Descriptive Video Service}} to make a program accessible to the visually impaired. Many programs that don't actually use SAP will still broadcast an SAP that is identical to the primary program; however, this is not required. If your TV is configured to use SAP and a particular channel isn't broadcasting SAP at that time, there won't be any sound.
|-
|Why aren't Pokémon real?||Pokémon are fantasised creatures that were designed to produce an interesting battle mechanic in a game. Some of the pokémons abilities would be impossible on earth as we know it. For instance, Magcargo is hotter than the surface of the sun.<ref name="Bulbapedia Magcargo">http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Magcargo#Trivia</ref>
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?|| Most dreams occur during a stage known as REM (Rapid Eye Movement). During REM, your brain is highly active and its wave pattern is the same as the wave patterns in a person who is awake. It should be noted that dreams can occur during other stages of sleep but most dreams that are vivid occur during the REM stage.
|-
|}

===Section Three===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do testicles move?|| The scrotum shrinks and expands to account for temperature changes.
|-
| Why are there psychics?|| Because the world would be boring otherwise.
|-
| Why are hats so expensive?|| Hats can be expensive depending on the quality of material, size, location, and demand. A probable answer is that hats are simply difficult to make, causing high prices. Another likely cause is the fact that hats are not widely worn in much of the western world and people who do wear them often have far fewer than they have, for example, shirts, meaning that manufacturers cannot get the same economies of scale in production and distribution.
|-
| Why is there caffeine in my shampoo?|| Because the producers want you to believe that caffeine penetrates the hair roots and thereby somehow protects it from negative testosterone impacts and from premature hair loss.
|-
| Why do your boobs hurt?|| Common reasons are a badly-fitted bra or {{w|PMS}}. It could also be a hormone imbalance, breastfeeding, large or awkwardly shaped breasts or a serious condition such as {{w|breast cancer}}.
|}

===Section Four===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why aren't economists rich? || Economists study how society organises resources but, contrary to the popular misconception, don't focus much on the short-term behaviour of the stock market (a system that is still poorly understood). In order to become rich, in most cases one has to own a commodity that produces more wealth, such as a large company, or be related to somebody who has done so. In rare cases, a particularly lucky individual could become rich by having an unusually high paying job, such as a famous actor or sports star. Neither of these situations are likely for someone studying the field of economics. Some economists do get very rich as strategists for banks and businesses, but most are just academics and analysts.
|-
| Why do Americans call it soccer? || {{w|Association Football}} is called Soccer (short for "association") in the USA because {{w|American Football}} is the more popular version there. Of note is that the word "soccer" originates on British soil, to distinguish it from Rugby football aka "rugger".
|-
| Why are my ears ringing? || {{w|Tinnitus}}, or ringing of the ears, can result from stress, foreign objects in the ear, hearing damage, wax build up, or any other number of causes.
|-
| Why are there so many Avengers? ||The number of Avengers has [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Avengers_members varied greatly] over the years and decades, each time with its own justification for why they need to work together, but the simplest answer is money. Cross-branding and cross-merchandising is successful to the brand and brings in new readers, plus creates a new franchise to profit from.
|-
|Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
|Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|}

===Section Five===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|-
| Why is Earth tilted? || The Earth's axial "tilt", wherein its axis of rotation is not perpendicular it its orbit, is a result of conservation of momentum when the Earth was formed, because not everything orbits in the same way. This is pure happenstance.
|-
| Why is space black? || What we call black is the absence of light. Space is mostly empty, and although there are many stars, the light from most of these stars hasn't reached us yet. In addition, a lot of light has been stretched by {{w|redshift}} so it's no longer visible to us. See {{w|Olbers' paradox}}
|-
| Why is outer space so cold? || It's hard to actually define a temperature for space - it's empty, so there's nothing to measure. However, most of space has very little radiation hitting it, so a person won't receive any energy, but will still radiate some away, resulting in a net loss of energy, colloquially "heat." Around the Earth, objects in direct sunlight will actually get very hot. In deep space, there is almost no warming radiation.
|-
| Why are there pyramids on the moon? || There are no pyramids on the moon. However, the appearance of mountains and some craters on the moon have fooled some into believing there are pyramids on the moon, but these claims are false.
|-
| Why is NASA shutting down? ||NASA isn't shutting down. This question might have something to do with the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_federal_government_shutdown_of_2013 Government Shutdown of 2013] or perhaps due to the then-current shuttle program ending, but that is not the entirety of NASA.
|}

===Section <s>Spider</s> Six===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there tiny spiders in my house?
|rowspan="6"|During autumn in particular male spiders reaching maturing will set off to find a mate. By chance they may end up in your house. When encountering spiders in large numbers, it is more likely that they are young from the same female spider. Females lay {{w|Spider#Reproduction_and_life_cycle|up to 3,000}} eggs at a time. These questions also plays off of Munroe's longstanding fear of spiders, especially the [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/8:_Red_spiders red spiders] mentioned in [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/Category:Red_Spiders several early comics].
|-
| Why do spiders come inside?
|-
| Why are there huge spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there lots of spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there spiders in my room?
|-
| Why are there so many spiders in my room?
|-
| Why do spider bites itch? ||This mostly happens as an immune response to [http://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/stories/why-do-mosquito-bites-itch histamines] under the skin which are injected through saliva.
|-
| Why is dying so scary? ||Part of human nature is the fear of the unknown, and death is the ultimate unknown because it is not knowable until it's experienced, and there is nobody to report what the result was. This leaves it open to speculation, and many major religions are based on preparing ones soul for death. Also, dying would leave loved ones families with the responsibility of taking care of their remains and finances. And finally, most people don't want to die, living for as long as possible, possibly because the unknown is too unbearable to cope with. Still though several people are not afraid of death and dying, and recognize life is short and to cherish each moment while we can. Death is inevitable, so we should not fear it. In addition, it would be evolutionarily advantageous for our ancestors to have feared and avoided death.
|-
| Why is there no GPS in laptops? ||It is not impossible for laptops to have a GPS, and some do. But there are [http://security.stackexchange.com/questions/50907/are-there-gps-tracker-for-laptops design difficulties] that have to be overcome including battery draining, room within the crowded device to place a receiver, WiFi can give a location just as well, and the product casing could interfere with its ability to functional normally and receive the signals necessary to operate as intended. Some Dell computers have these, but the privacy one needs to give up to accept the terms and conditions makes it unfavorable.
|-
| Why do knees click? || Typical of other clicking and cracking of joints, this may be the sound of [http://www.webmd.com/pain-management/knee-pain/features/knee-cracks-pops ligaments tightening]. However do not rely on a wiki to diagnose a medical conditions. Consult a licensed physician.
|-
|-
| Why aren't there E grades? ||E grades [http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/e-f-grading-scale/ actually exist] in some districts, but they are rare. In their long and bizarre history, E was originally used where F is today (E was the lowest grade), but in those systems, students often received E's for an "Excellent" grade, creating much confusion. F was used in place instead and E was eliminated from a standard grading scale.
|-
| Why is isolation bad? ||Isolation is when a person deliberately secludes themselves away from others, often far-removed from society. This can happen in locations as small as a city apartment and as large as the open woods. People evolved as social animals and it is generally held that those who isolate themselves suffer from depression or other forms of psychological imbalance. Of course society can trigger many of these imbalances causing an individual to isolate themselves. Isolation is often seen as therapeutic so people can spend time with themselves constructively, often finding peace within themselves and through mediation. Monks and hermits generally live in solitude as well. Many people view a decision to be isolated as noble, and others as healthy. While general interaction is largely healthy, in the crowded modern world, isolation is neither good or bad; it depends on the person and what that isolation does to them.
|-
| Why do boys like me? ||Attraction comes in many forms: physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, among others. Many people will lie about what they like about you to get something else (money, sex, etc.), but most are genuine. It is not possible to assert definitively why one person may like another person, and that is something that needs to be discussed openly and honestly with them and nobody else.
|-
| Why don't boys like me? ||Similar to the answer above about what makes one desirable to another, there are an equal number of factors that make one unappealing. This can include everything from physical appearance to how one treats others. If a person is rude and unfriendly, most people find that not-conducive to healthy relationship and avoid the person who is asking. Not being liked by someone you like however does not mean you're wrong or are a bad person and in most cases has to do with the person you are asking about.
|-
| Why is there always a Java update? ||[https://www.java.com/en/download/faq/whatis_java.xml Java] is a software that runs on most computers and mobile devices that is crucial to its security and stability. The reason why it always updates is because it needs to stay current with the ever-upgrading fleet of browsers, operating systems and software that supports Java. Additionally Java updates itself so each version can run optimally. Software coding and debugging is a never-ending process towards perfectly stable releases.
|-
| Why are there red dots on my thighs? || This might be [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Petechia Petechia], which are broken blood vessels, however do not rely on a wiki to diagnose medical conditions. Consult a licensed physician.
|-
| Why is lying good? ||Lying and other forms of dishonesty is typically seen as bad because it lowers one's credibility and makes them less likely to be trusted in the future. It is almost always advantageous to tell the truth, as lies have a way of escalating as you need to keep expanding on the lie to cover your tracks. There are instances however where lying may be used in more noble circumstances. For example, if a friend asks your opinion on something they have made (such as a poem or painting) that you do not like, it is okay to tell them you like it because protecting their feelings and your relationship is more important than how you feel. Often military personnel are trained to keep national security secrets at all costs and will lie about what they know to save themselves and the country.
|}

===Section Seven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there slaves in the bible? ||Slavery was viewed differently in the early years of human civilization before the contemporary moral and ethical conversations began centuries later. The Jewish legal system as presented in the bible {{w|The Bible and slavery|justified slavery}} for a number of reasons, notably to pay off some sort of debt. Slaves were seen as property and their work provided value to the slave owner, but such a relationship was legally required to be temporary and slaves had some basic human rights. Similarly slave owners rationalized their ownership through scripture, pointing out that it was in the Bible and therefore okay with God — without wishing to go off on a tangent, if you have to rationalize your system of slavery then it's probably illegal under historic Jewish law.
|-
| Why do twins have different fingerprints? || Fingerprints are not only from the DNA, but from the conditions in the womb which differ from child to child.
|-
| Why are Americans afraid of dragons? ||This question was the title of a [http://blogs.sfu.ca/courses/spring2012/engl387/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Why-are-Americans-Afraid-of-Dragons.docx 1974 essay] by Ursula K. LeGeuin in which she makes a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semiotics semiotic] analysis of dragon mythology. She argues that our belief in dragons (and those outside of America as well) stems from childhood, much like other ferocious fictional creatures such as goblins and hobbits, but many hold onto these fears as a way of avoiding reality. In her closing argument, she writes, "They know that its truth challenges, even threatens, all that is false, all that is phony, unnecessary, and trivial in the life they have let themselves be forced into living. They are afraid of dragons, because they are afraid of freedom."
|-
| Why is HTTPS crossed out in red? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a line through HTTPS? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook? || Facebook has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is HTTPS important? || For security reasons, as a site with HTTPS has encrypted traffic.
|}

===Section Eight===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there swarms of gnats? || The reason gnats (and other creatures) tend to swarm together is likely a safety-in-numbers protection, and as a big gathering to find a mate.
|-
| Why is there phlegm? ||{{w|Phlegm#Phlegm|Phlegm}} is a thick, viscous fluid produced by the mucus membranes as a way to clear the airway and aids in the release of bacteria, disease and debris in those passages.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [ {{w|Steve Duffy}}, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for {{w|geese}}. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried {{w|lasers}} and bullhorns — hey, get out of here, you crows — and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}.
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type like Mr. Mime are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears, which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as.
|-
| Why do children get cancer? ||{{w|Cancer}} is an aggressive and often fatal disease that has the potential to affect all humans as well as other organisms. There are multiple types of cancer, each with their own epidemiology, but children are not immune to succumbing to the horrific effects of the disease. Children are human beings and are subject to the same illnesses adults have, regardless of age, or their innocence. There is no divine or supernatural explanation for this. Simply put, life is a battle for all humans regardless of how small they are.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}} The Odyssey also says that before sailing, the crew forgot to offer a sacrifice as was ordained.
|-
| Why is there ice in space? || Space is {{w|Outer_space#Environment|Cold}}. The background radiation, which is used to measure the temperature of space's vacuum, is estimated at about 3K (−270 °C; −454 °F). Water freezes at 273.15 K (0 °C; 32 °F). Because the temperature in space is less than the freezing point of water, liquids freeze in space, turning into ice.
|}

===Section <s>Owl</s> Nine===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there an owl in my back yard? || Owls can be seen all over the world, and live in a wide variety of habitats. They are mainly noctural, and spend a large portion of the night hunting. The owl in your back yard is likely looking for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl outside my window? || As with the question above, the owl is likely to be hunting for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl on the dollar bill? || On the front of a dollar bill, near the upper right '1' is a tiny section of the design which can be seen to represent an owl. Conspiracy theorists will note that owls were symbolically linked to the Masons, while others will instead see a spider.
|-
| Why do owls attack people? || While owls and human often live in close proximity without problems, as with other species, owls may attack if they feel threatened. When people irritate or otherwise make owls feel unsafe, they retaliate with violence to protect themselves.
|-
| Why are AK47s so expensive? || The market value of an AK47 varies depending on where in the world you live. With strict gun control laws, obtaining an AK47 in the UK is likely to be more expensive due to the risks involved for those supplying the weapon. In ex-soviet countries and the middle east, AK47s are more plentiful, and hence the price is likely to be lower.
|-
| Why are there helicopters circling my house? ||People living in high-crime areas will often hear helicopters circling, especially at night, when police use the helicopter's searchlight to locate and track suspects, or to light a crime scene. Those Googling this question might be wondering if a dangerous fugitive is nearby, or what else may be going on. Alternately, this question may be a joke because it is so incongruous to the others in this section. The joke is that people would be Googling about owls attacking people and assault rifle prices, which could, ostensibly alert authorities to come to your house to arrest you.
|}

===Section Ten===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there gods? || Gods and goddesses are part of mythology and folklore that are used to give spiritual guidance as well as explanations for phenomena that are yet unexplained by natural processes.
|-
|Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why is Mt Vesuvius there? ||The simple answer is that volcanoes are created by interactions where the Earth's tectonic plates meet. These conditions only exist in a few places on Earth. The question could also be asking, "why is Mt Vesuvius near such a heavily populated area?" Humans have lived near Vesuvius throughout history, due to its pleasant climate, rich soil, and proximity to other major cities. The Italian government [http://www.theguardian.com/world/2003/jun/05/italy.sophiearie offers generous cash incentives] to move people away from the danger zone, but finds few takers.This question could also be a reference to mountaineer {{w|George Mallory}}'s famous answer as to why he wanted to climb Mount Everest: "Because it's there."
|-
| Why do they say T minus? || Time before the launch of a spacecraft is denoted as T minus because the launch has not happened yet. Any time after the launched is stated without the minus, for example T 3 seconds, so time before the launch can be seen as "minus" time. The T stands for "Test" or "Time".
|-
| Why are there obelisks? || {{w|Obelisk}} article has more
|-
| Why are wrestlers always wet? || Professional wrestling is strenuous activity, whether its fake or not. Strenuous activity results in sweat, giving the bodyan appearance of being wet. Greco-roman wrestling and Turkish Oil Wrestling both involve oiling the body, giving a similar appearance.
|-
| Why are oceans becoming more acidic? || Due to the higher amount of carbon dioxide on the atmosphere, which dissolves in the oceans turning into carbonic acid - CO2+H2O=H2CO3 (see {{w|Ocean acidification}})
|-
| Why is Arwen dying? || {{w|Elf (Middle-Earth)#Death|Elves}} can die from grief .
|-
| Why aren't my quail laying eggs? || Have you tried turning them off and on again?
|-
| Why aren't my quail eggs hatching? || Problems in incubation, probably.
|-
|Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state, but Hawaii was still a fundamental part of the United States as it was an incorporated territory.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example, RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|}

===Section Eleven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are my boobs itchy? ||It could be anything from dry skin to a rare life-threatening disease. Could also be related to pregnancy, PMS, or puberty. [http://www.just-health.net/Itchy-Breast.html Here's a thorough list] of possible causes and remedies.
|-
| Why are cigarettes legal? ||Despite the obvious detrimental affects nicotine has on health, like caffeine and alcohol, it is easy to regulate. Substances like marijuana and other drugs are mainly illegal because the government and regulatory agencies have no control over their production and distribution and therefore cannot profit from it. Nicotine however, which is the key ingredient in tobacco can be regulated and taxed and is.
|-
| Why are there ducks in my pool? ||Most likely, they're looking for a place to mate. Which means you'll soon have baby ducks in your pool. Most migratory birds are protected by wildlife laws, so you want to prevent them from moving into your pool in the first place. The [http://www.dfwwildlife.org/duck.html DFW Wildlife Coalition] has some tips.
|-
| Why is Jesus white? ||This is an ethnocentric viewpoint that varies throughout cultures. In African cultures he is portrayed as black. In short, whatever culture he is introduced to, those inhabitants will have him fit their own image.
|-
| Why is there liquid in my ear? ||[http://www.healthline.com/symptom/discharge-from-ear It's called otorrhea], and can be caused by infection, trauma, or changes in pressure. A common cause is [http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/swimmers-ear/basics/definition/con-20014723 Swimmer's ear], an infection of the outer ear canal.
|-
| Why do Q tips feel good? ||The inner ear contains [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erectile_tissue erectile tissue] (as does your inner nose which is why sneezing feels good) so you are massing tissue which gets aroused upon stimulation.
|-
| Why do good people die? ||Everybody dies, no matter how good or bad they were. But sometimes if people are really bad they are made to die sooner. (But loved ones and ones who were known to make memorable or valuable contributions are mourned and revered more than a person who has left much pain to others as their legacy; we remember the good ones and so it hurts more.)
|-
| Why are ultrasounds important? ||Ultrasound scans provide a great deal of information about a fetus, thus increasing the chances of a healthy birth. They have many other medical uses.
|-
| Why are ultrasound machines expensive? ||As hospital equipment goes, ultrasound machines are actually a bargain. [http://www.costowl.com/healthcare/healthcare-ultrasound-machine-costs.html A new ultrasound machine] costs about $20,000-$75,000, depending on features. Comparable devices are much more expensive: The [http://info.blockimaging.com/bid/84432/CT-Scanner-Price-Guide CT scanner] runs $90,000-$250,000, while the [http://www.ehow.com/about_4731161_much-do-mri-machines-cost.html MRI machine] easily goes over a million.
|-
| Why is stealing wrong? ||Stealing is theft and it is illegal. Taking something that is not yours without permission or payment hurts the livelihood of other individuals as well as damages their trust in others.
|}

===Vertical Questions===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there hell if god forgives? ||There is not a single answer to this question. The answer varies based on the religion and that religion's sect mixed with personal interpretations of that religions scripture and how a person decides to follow it. However the idea of what Hell will be like also varies. There is no one answer to this question, but the easiest explanation is that the individual did not pray hard enough, correctly, was not part of the right religion, and their forgiveness was contingent on something that the person either did not do or know to do (or say or think)
|-
| Why do iguanas die? ||All living things die, but iguanas may suffer from [http://www.anapsid.org/iguana/kidneyfailure.html kidney failure].
|-
| Why is GPS free? || GPS was originally developed by the U.S. military for its own use, not for commercial purposes. However, the government realized that free GPS would have a significant bonus for the economy and would prevent disasters like the {{w|Korean Air Lines Flight 007}} where a plane was shot down after accidentally entering Soviet airspace, and in 1983 President Reagan declared that the US would make GPS available to all. At one point, "{{w|selective availability}}" was used to degrade performance for civilian users, but since 2000 this has also been switched off.
|-
| Why are trees tall? ||Tall is a relative term, and Redwoods are famous for their height - among the tallest in the world. The reason for this is, in part [http://www.nps.gov/redw/faqs.htm climate, fog, rain, good soil, few predators, among others].
|-
|Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why is there lava? ||{{w|Lava}} is magma (molten rock) which is at the Earth's surface. Magma in the Earth comes from the melting of rock due to rising heat from deeper within the planet. {{w|Earth's internal heat budget|This heat}} is about half radiogenic and half primordial (left over from the formation and differentiation of the Earth). Most of the crust and mantle of the Earth is solid rock, but in places (usually controlled by plate tectonics, but {{w|Hawaii hotspot|not always}}) where the heat is high enough the minerals with lowest melting point start to melt and then migrate upwards towards the surface. This melt collects in {{w|Magma chamber|magma chambers}}, in which the magma may start to cool and crystallize. Sometimes it will crystallize completely, becoming an underground solid body called a pluton. Other times melt will keep migrating upwards until it reaches the surface and erupts as lava, forming a {{w|volcano}} or undersea vent.
|-
| Why is YKK on a zippers? || {{w|YKK}} Group is the name of a large group of Japanese manufacturing companies, which among other things manufacture a lot of zippers.
|-
| Why is life so boring? ||It is up to an individual to find meaning and interest in life. Monotony, predictability and lack of physical and intellectual stimulation would lead to a feeling of boredom.
|-
| Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts? ||Ghosts are a supernatural phenomenon that have not been empirically proven to exist. Those who believe in ghosts implicitly believe in a soul (of which a ghost is a materialization of), and it is a commonly held belief by religious institutions and ghost-hunters that animals do not have souls and thus dinosaurs would not have any either.
|-
|Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man, and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned. Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why do I feel dizzy? ||Balance is achieved from fluids in the inner-ear, but [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dizziness#Epidemiology dizziness] can have nearly a dozen causes.
|-
| Why are dogs afraid of fireworks? ||Loud noises can trigger their flight or fight responses when they are [http://www.cesarsway.com/dogbehavior/hyperdog/How-to-Keep-Your-Dog-Safe-and-Calm-During-Fireworks nervous].
|-
| Why are there weeks? || Weeks were originally important for religious reasons, primarily the requirement to observe a sabbath (day of rest) every seventh day. Today it is used to create a common schedule that doesn't change due to month length, much like the months divide a year to be able to schedule things like dentist appointments. Similarly, hours and minutes divide a day making it possible to create a schedule.
|}

==See also==
http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/1l3na7/questions/cbvigrd, answers to all the questions.

==References==
<references/>

==Transcript==
:[This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. These are described at the end. Questions are given in roughly columnar order. None of the questions have question marks.]

:Questions found in Google Autocomplete

:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after HTTP
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arraow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:Why do testicles move
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:Why is there caffeine in my shampoo
:Why do your boobs hurt
:Why aren't economists rich
:Why do Americans call it soccer
:Why are my ears ringing
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:Why is space black
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the moon
:Why is NASA shutting down
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:Why do spiders come inside
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:Why do knees click
:Why aren't there E grades
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good
:Why is GPS free
:Why are trees tall
:Why are there slaves in the Bible
:Why do twins have different fingerprints
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons
:Why is there lava
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:Why is there phlegm
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:Why is psychic weak to bug
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space
:Why are there female Mr Mimes
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:Why is there an owl on the dollar bill
:Why do owls attack people
:Why are AK47s so expensive
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America
:Why is life so boring
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are there ducks in my pool
:Why is Jesus white
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:Why are ultrasounds important
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong
:Why is YKK on all zippers
:Why is HTTPS crossed out in red
:Why is there a line through HTTPS
:Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook
:Why is HTTPS important
:Why are there weeks
:Why do I feel dizzy
:Why are dogs afraid of fireworks
:Why is there no king in England

:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing

:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts

:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels

:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important.

:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Google Search]]
[[Category:Squirrels]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Soccer]]
[[Category:Star Trek]]

1256: Questions

2017-01-12T08:27:33Z

162.158.255.220: /* Illustrated Panels */

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}
A larger version of the picture can be found in http://xkcd.com/1256/large/.
==Explanation==
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon". All these questions and many more (33,171 in total) can be found in http://xkcd.com/why.txt.

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
The tables below have been created so as to split the comic into almost entirely arbitrary blocks, which have then been identified with similarly arbitrary numbers. As a general rule, section numbers work top to bottom, then right to left.
===Illustrated Panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||Arms stop growing because longer arms would not be a very useful way to spend resources. Human DNA has programmed the body to gradually ossify (turn to bone) the growing arms and legs, closing the {{w|epiphyseal plate}} (the flat plate at the end of each long bone), at which point they stop growing. Alternately, the muscles of the arm, which may have been the intended subject of the question, may fail to grow if not exercised with appropriate resistance, repetition or frequency; if nutrition is insufficient; if insufficient recovery time is given; or if sufficient levels of certain hormones like growth hormone or testosterone are not present.
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||There is no hard evidence of ghosts.
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||Squirrels are the product of a long sequence of evolution, like any other animal. They persist because they effectively reproduce and compete for resources within their niche, but they are also the product of many circumstantial events that has led to them being the way they are.
|-
|Why is sex so important?||Sex is important biologically because it is the primary method of reproduction in many different species, and culturally because it both plays an important role in human relationship and causes hard-to-control urges that affect behaviour. However, it can be of varying importance to different people (see [http://www.asexuality.org/home/?q=overview.html asexuality]).
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe {{w|guns}} do exist and are mentioned at the beginning of {{w|Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban}} when the news gives a warning that Sirius Black has one. Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns; a revolver can't shoot lightning, summon items or teleport its user. Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his Muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is set in the United Kingdom (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}

===Section One===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? || Partly to get air, partly because it's an effective way to catch prey near the surface, and partly because they just seem to find it fun - it's like going into outer space!
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?|| Often, these are used by couples to view themselves during coitus.
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field, although they can be useful in fields for grazing animals, since they provide shade.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company. However, if Game Freak were to develop a Pokémon MMO the MMOs would be strong competition against the console games and therefore reducing the Pokémon demographic significantly. The mobile app {{w|Pokémon Go}} has since partly filled the MMO niche, with multiplayer interactivity through item drops and fighting at gyms.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?|| Highway/freeway {{w|noise barrier|noise barriers}} sometimes have doors in them to allow workers access to both sides of the barrier.
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?|| To add atmosphere and to give players hints when there is a dark cave nearby. See [http://minecraft.gamepedia.com/Ambience Minecraft Wiki].
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||There are certain people who are more respected and well-known than other people, whether it be because of their acting career, major advancements to science, or a sex tape.
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being venomous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||{{w|pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}. {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||An old folk remedy for {{w|gonorrhea}} was to clap on the sides of the penis.
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?|| The question relates to the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?" However, they most likely remain "friends" because they are in the same class at school and are therefore "forced" to be around one another.
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||{{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters|Aang}} is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||This likely refers to imessage chat being blue. These messages are blue when sending a message to another apple device. When sent as an SMS message, they will be green.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||Because some people buy them. Mustaches, especially handlebar-style mustaches, were a popular fad at the time of this comic.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||Fuzzy pink mustaches are used to designate cars in the {{w|Lyft}} service.
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||See {{w|Movember}}
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||There are an estimated [http://oh.audubon.org/bsc/SOTB.html 400 bird species] in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_birds_of_Ohio Ohio], but there are [http://www.jstor.org/discover/2419997sid=21104910103541&uid=4&uid=3739776&uid=2&uid=3739256 2.74 nesting pairs per acre].
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?|| {{w|lake_effect|Lake-effect}} rain develops in the same manner as lake-effect snow.
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section Two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?|| In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them. An alternative hypothesis is that they want to hug/touch their loved ones one last time.
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||Blood moves through veins due to irregular pressure from skeletal muscles combined with valves to control direction. In varicose veins these valves malfunction affecting blood flow. In arteries blood flow is produced directly from pressure caused by the heart.
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?|| {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||Programming is the art of writing instructions for a computer to do. Since the computer has a limited set of instructions for you to use it involves a new way of thinking for many. It is also hard because the computer itself is not smart or adaptable to unexpected problems. For instance when a human is told to sort books in a shelf, he or she can do that despite there might be things in the way (he or she will just move it to the side). A computer will generally just crash if it doesn't have instructions on how to deal with the unexcepted problem.
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?|| A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, Wikipedia's {{w|Zero-ohm link}} article gives sufficient explanation.
|-
|Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||The brain enjoys repetition especially in music.
|-
|Why do trees die?||Some common reasons include lack of water, lack of nitrogen in the soil and being chopped down.
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||Some stations broadcast a {{w|second audio program}}, an alternative sound track that your TV can be configured to use instead of the primary program. This is intended to be used for broadcasting in an alternate language, or for {{w|Descriptive Video Service}} to make a program accessible to the visually impaired. Many programs that don't actually use SAP will still broadcast an SAP that is identical to the primary program; however, this is not required. If your TV is configured to use SAP and a particular channel isn't broadcasting SAP at that time, there won't be any sound.
|-
|Why aren't Pokémon real?||Pokémon are fantasised creatures that were designed to produce an interesting battle mechanic in a game. Some of the pokémons abilities would be impossible on earth as we know it. For instance, Magcargo is hotter than the surface of the sun.<ref name="Bulbapedia Magcargo">http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Magcargo#Trivia</ref>
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?|| Most dreams occur during a stage known as REM (Rapid Eye Movement). During REM, your brain is highly active and its wave pattern is the same as the wave patterns in a person who is awake. It should be noted that dreams can occur during other stages of sleep but most dreams that are vivid occur during the REM stage.
|-
|}

===Section Three===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do testicles move?|| The scrotum shrinks and expands to account for temperature changes.
|-
| Why are there psychics?|| Because the world would be boring otherwise.
|-
| Why are hats so expensive?|| Hats can be expensive depending on the quality of material, size, location, and demand. A probable answer is that hats are simply difficult to make, causing high prices. Another likely cause is the fact that hats are not widely worn in much of the western world and people who do wear them often have far fewer than they have, for example, shirts, meaning that manufacturers cannot get the same economies of scale in production and distribution.
|-
| Why is there caffeine in my shampoo?|| Because the producers want you to believe that caffeine penetrates the hair roots and thereby somehow protects it from negative testosterone impacts and from premature hair loss.
|-
| Why do your boobs hurt?|| Common reasons are a badly-fitted bra or {{w|PMS}}. It could also be a hormone imbalance, breastfeeding, large or awkwardly shaped breasts or a serious condition such as {{w|breast cancer}}.
|}

===Section Four===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why aren't economists rich? || Economists study how society organises resources but, contrary to the popular misconception, don't focus much on the short-term behaviour of the stock market (a system that is still poorly understood). In order to become rich, in most cases one has to own a commodity that produces more wealth, such as a large company, or be related to somebody who has done so. In rare cases, a particularly lucky individual could become rich by having an unusually high paying job, such as a famous actor or sports star. Neither of these situations are likely for someone studying the field of economics. Some economists do get very rich as strategists for banks and businesses, but most are just academics and analysts.
|-
| Why do Americans call it soccer? || {{w|Association Football}} is called Soccer (short for "association") in the USA because {{w|American Football}} is the more popular version there. Of note is that the word "soccer" originates on British soil, to distinguish it from Rugby football aka "rugger".
|-
| Why are my ears ringing? || {{w|Tinnitus}}, or ringing of the ears, can result from stress, foreign objects in the ear, hearing damage, wax build up, or any other number of causes.
|-
| Why are there so many Avengers? ||The number of Avengers has [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Avengers_members varied greatly] over the years and decades, each time with its own justification for why they need to work together, but the simplest answer is money. Cross-branding and cross-merchandising is successful to the brand and brings in new readers, plus creates a new franchise to profit from.
|-
|Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
|Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|}

===Section Five===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|-
| Why is Earth tilted? || The Earth's axial "tilt", wherein its axis of rotation is not perpendicular it its orbit, is a result of conservation of momentum when the Earth was formed, because not everything orbits in the same way. This is pure happenstance.
|-
| Why is space black? || What we call black is the absence of light. Space is mostly empty, and although there are many stars, the light from most of these stars hasn't reached us yet. In addition, a lot of light has been stretched by {{w|redshift}} so it's no longer visible to us. See {{w|Olbers' paradox}}
|-
| Why is outer space so cold? || It's hard to actually define a temperature for space - it's empty, so there's nothing to measure. However, most of space has very little radiation hitting it, so a person won't receive any energy, but will still radiate some away, resulting in a net loss of energy, colloquially "heat." Around the Earth, objects in direct sunlight will actually get very hot. In deep space, there is almost no warming radiation.
|-
| Why are there pyramids on the moon? || There are no pyramids on the moon. However, the appearance of mountains and some craters on the moon have fooled some into believing there are pyramids on the moon, but these claims are false.
|-
| Why is NASA shutting down? ||NASA isn't shutting down. This question might have something to do with the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_federal_government_shutdown_of_2013 Government Shutdown of 2013] or perhaps due to the then-current shuttle program ending, but that is not the entirety of NASA.
|}

===Section <s>Spider</s> Six===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there tiny spiders in my house?
|rowspan="6"|During autumn in particular male spiders reaching maturing will set off to find a mate. By chance they may end up in your house. When encountering spiders in large numbers, it is more likely that they are young from the same female spider. Females lay {{w|Spider#Reproduction_and_life_cycle|up to 3,000}} eggs at a time. These questions also plays off of Munroe's longstanding fear of spiders, especially the [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/8:_Red_spiders red spiders] mentioned in [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/Category:Red_Spiders several early comics].
|-
| Why do spiders come inside?
|-
| Why are there huge spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there lots of spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there spiders in my room?
|-
| Why are there so many spiders in my room?
|-
| Why do spider bites itch? ||This mostly happens as an immune response to [http://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/stories/why-do-mosquito-bites-itch histamines] under the skin which are injected through saliva.
|-
| Why is dying so scary? ||Part of human nature is the fear of the unknown, and death is the ultimate unknown because it is not knowable until it's experienced, and there is nobody to report what the result was. This leaves it open to speculation, and many major religions are based on preparing ones soul for death. Also, dying would leave loved ones families with the responsibility of taking care of their remains and finances. And finally, most people don't want to die, living for as long as possible, possibly because the unknown is too unbearable to cope with. Still though several people are not afraid of death and dying, and recognize life is short and to cherish each moment while we can. Death is inevitable, so we should not fear it. In addition, it would be evolutionarily advantageous for our ancestors to have feared and avoided death.
|-
| Why is there no GPS in laptops? ||It is not impossible for laptops to have a GPS, and some do. But there are [http://security.stackexchange.com/questions/50907/are-there-gps-tracker-for-laptops design difficulties] that have to be overcome including battery draining, room within the crowded device to place a receiver, WiFi can give a location just as well, and the product casing could interfere with its ability to functional normally and receive the signals necessary to operate as intended. Some Dell computers have these, but the privacy one needs to give up to accept the terms and conditions makes it unfavorable.
|-
| Why do knees click? || Typical of other clicking and cracking of joints, this may be the sound of [http://www.webmd.com/pain-management/knee-pain/features/knee-cracks-pops ligaments tightening]. However do not rely on a wiki to diagnose a medical conditions. Consult a licensed physician.
|-
|-
| Why aren't there E grades? ||E grades [http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/e-f-grading-scale/ actually exist] in some districts, but they are rare. In their long and bizarre history, E was originally used where F is today (E was the lowest grade), but in those systems, students often received E's for an "Excellent" grade, creating much confusion. F was used in place instead and E was eliminated from a standard grading scale.
|-
| Why is isolation bad? ||Isolation is when a person deliberately secludes themselves away from others, often far-removed from society. This can happen in locations as small as a city apartment and as large as the open woods. People evolved as social animals and it is generally held that those who isolate themselves suffer from depression or other forms of psychological imbalance. Of course society can trigger many of these imbalances causing an individual to isolate themselves. Isolation is often seen as therapeutic so people can spend time with themselves constructively, often finding peace within themselves and through mediation. Monks and hermits generally live in solitude as well. Many people view a decision to be isolated as noble, and others as healthy. While general interaction is largely healthy, in the crowded modern world, isolation is neither good or bad; it depends on the person and what that isolation does to them.
|-
| Why do boys like me? ||Attraction comes in many forms: physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, among others. Many people will lie about what they like about you to get something else (money, sex, etc.), but most are genuine. It is not possible to assert definitively why one person may like another person, and that is something that needs to be discussed openly and honestly with them and nobody else.
|-
| Why don't boys like me? ||Similar to the answer above about what makes one desirable to another, there are an equal number of factors that make one unappealing. This can include everything from physical appearance to how one treats others. If a person is rude and unfriendly, most people find that not-conducive to healthy relationship and avoid the person who is asking. Not being liked by someone you like however does not mean you're wrong or are a bad person and in most cases has to do with the person you are asking about.
|-
| Why is there always a Java update? ||[https://www.java.com/en/download/faq/whatis_java.xml Java] is a software that runs on most computers and mobile devices that is crucial to its security and stability. The reason why it always updates is because it needs to stay current with the ever-upgrading fleet of browsers, operating systems and software that supports Java. Additionally Java updates itself so each version can run optimally. Software coding and debugging is a never-ending process towards perfectly stable releases.
|-
| Why are there red dots on my thighs? || This might be [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Petechia Petechia], which are broken blood vessels, however do not rely on a wiki to diagnose medical conditions. Consult a licensed physician.
|-
| Why is lying good? ||Lying and other forms of dishonesty is typically seen as bad because it lowers one's credibility and makes them less likely to be trusted in the future. It is almost always advantageous to tell the truth, as lies have a way of escalating as you need to keep expanding on the lie to cover your tracks. There are instances however where lying may be used in more noble circumstances. For example, if a friend asks your opinion on something they have made (such as a poem or painting) that you do not like, it is okay to tell them you like it because protecting their feelings and your relationship is more important than how you feel. Often military personnel are trained to keep national security secrets at all costs and will lie about what they know to save themselves and the country.
|}

===Section Seven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there slaves in the bible? ||Slavery was viewed differently in the early years of human civilization before the contemporary moral and ethical conversations began centuries later. The Jewish legal system as presented in the bible {{w|The Bible and slavery|justified slavery}} for a number of reasons, notably to pay off some sort of debt. Slaves were seen as property and their work provided value to the slave owner, but such a relationship was legally required to be temporary and slaves had some basic human rights. Similarly slave owners rationalized their ownership through scripture, pointing out that it was in the Bible and therefore okay with God — without wishing to go off on a tangent, if you have to rationalize your system of slavery then it's probably illegal under historic Jewish law.
|-
| Why do twins have different fingerprints? || Fingerprints are not only from the DNA, but from the conditions in the womb which differ from child to child.
|-
| Why are Americans afraid of dragons? ||This question was the title of a [http://blogs.sfu.ca/courses/spring2012/engl387/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Why-are-Americans-Afraid-of-Dragons.docx 1974 essay] by Ursula K. LeGeuin in which she makes a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semiotics semiotic] analysis of dragon mythology. She argues that our belief in dragons (and those outside of America as well) stems from childhood, much like other ferocious fictional creatures such as goblins and hobbits, but many hold onto these fears as a way of avoiding reality. In her closing argument, she writes, "They know that its truth challenges, even threatens, all that is false, all that is phony, unnecessary, and trivial in the life they have let themselves be forced into living. They are afraid of dragons, because they are afraid of freedom."
|-
| Why is HTTPS crossed out in red? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a line through HTTPS? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook? || Facebook has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is HTTPS important? || For security reasons, as a site with HTTPS has encrypted traffic.
|}

===Section Eight===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there swarms of gnats? || The reason gnats (and other creatures) tend to swarm together is likely a safety-in-numbers protection, and as a big gathering to find a mate.
|-
| Why is there phlegm? ||{{w|Phlegm#Phlegm|Phlegm}} is a thick, viscous fluid produced by the mucus membranes as a way to clear the airway and aids in the release of bacteria, disease and debris in those passages.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [ {{w|Steve Duffy}}, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for {{w|geese}}. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried {{w|lasers}} and bullhorns — hey, get out of here, you crows — and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}.
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type like Mr. Mime are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears, which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as.
|-
| Why do children get cancer? ||{{w|Cancer}} is an aggressive and often fatal disease that has the potential to affect all humans as well as other organisms. There are multiple types of cancer, each with their own epidemiology, but children are not immune to succumbing to the horrific effects of the disease. Children are human beings and are subject to the same illnesses adults have, regardless of age, or their innocence. There is no divine or supernatural explanation for this. Simply put, life is a battle for all humans regardless of how small they are.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}} The Odyssey also says that before sailing, the crew forgot to offer a sacrifice as was ordained.
|-
| Why is there ice in space? || Space is {{w|Outer_space#Environment|Cold}}. The background radiation, which is used to measure the temperature of space's vacuum, is estimated at about 3K (−270 °C; −454 °F). Water freezes at 273.15 K (0 °C; 32 °F). Because the temperature in space is less than the freezing point of water, liquids freeze in space, turning into ice.
|}

===Section <s>Owl</s> Nine===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there an owl in my back yard? || Owls can be seen all over the world, and live in a wide variety of habitats. They are mainly noctural, and spend a large portion of the night hunting. The owl in your back yard is likely looking for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl outside my window? || As with the question above, the owl is likely to be hunting for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl on the dollar bill? || On the front of a dollar bill, near the upper right '1' is a tiny section of the design which can be seen to represent an owl. Conspiracy theorists will note that owls were symbolically linked to the Masons, while others will instead see a spider.
|-
| Why do owls attack people? || While owls and human often live in close proximity without problems, as with other species, owls may attack if they feel threatened. When people irritate or otherwise make owls feel unsafe, they retaliate with violence to protect themselves.
|-
| Why are AK47s so expensive? || The market value of an AK47 varies depending on where in the world you live. With strict gun control laws, obtaining an AK47 in the UK is likely to be more expensive due to the risks involved for those supplying the weapon. In ex-soviet countries and the middle east, AK47s are more plentiful, and hence the price is likely to be lower.
|-
| Why are there helicopters circling my house? ||This question is likely a joke because it is so incongruous to the others in this section. The joke is that people would be Googling about owls attacking people and assault rifle prices, which could, ostensibly alert authorities to come to your house to arrest you. If this is not the case, then the helicopter could be there for myriad reasons.
|}

===Section Ten===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there gods? || Gods and goddesses are part of mythology and folklore that are used to give spiritual guidance as well as explanations for phenomena that are yet unexplained by natural processes.
|-
|Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why is Mt Vesuvius there? ||The simple answer is that volcanoes are created by interactions where the Earth's tectonic plates meet. These conditions only exist in a few places on Earth. The question could also be asking, "why is Mt Vesuvius near such a heavily populated area?" Humans have lived near Vesuvius throughout history, due to its pleasant climate, rich soil, and proximity to other major cities. The Italian government [http://www.theguardian.com/world/2003/jun/05/italy.sophiearie offers generous cash incentives] to move people away from the danger zone, but finds few takers.This question could also be a reference to mountaineer {{w|George Mallory}}'s famous answer as to why he wanted to climb Mount Everest: "Because it's there."
|-
| Why do they say T minus? || Time before the launch of a spacecraft is denoted as T minus because the launch has not happened yet. Any time after the launched is stated without the minus, for example T 3 seconds, so time before the launch can be seen as "minus" time. The T stands for "Test" or "Time".
|-
| Why are there obelisks? || {{w|Obelisk}} article has more
|-
| Why are wrestlers always wet? || Professional wrestling is strenuous activity, whether its fake or not. Strenuous activity results in sweat, giving the bodyan appearance of being wet. Greco-roman wrestling and Turkish Oil Wrestling both involve oiling the body, giving a similar appearance.
|-
| Why are oceans becoming more acidic? || Due to the higher amount of carbon dioxide on the atmosphere, which dissolves in the oceans turning into carbonic acid - CO2+H2O=H2CO3 (see {{w|Ocean acidification}})
|-
| Why is Arwen dying? || {{w|Elf (Middle-Earth)#Death|Elves}} can die from grief .
|-
| Why aren't my quail laying eggs? || Have you tried turning them off and on again?
|-
| Why aren't my quail eggs hatching? || Problems in incubation, probably.
|-
|Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state, but Hawaii was still a fundamental part of the United States as it was an incorporated territory.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example, RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|}

===Section Eleven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are my boobs itchy? ||It could be anything from dry skin to a rare life-threatening disease. Could also be related to pregnancy, PMS, or puberty. [http://www.just-health.net/Itchy-Breast.html Here's a thorough list] of possible causes and remedies.
|-
| Why are cigarettes legal? ||Despite the obvious detrimental affects nicotine has on health, like caffeine and alcohol, it is easy to regulate. Substances like marijuana and other drugs are mainly illegal because the government and regulatory agencies have no control over their production and distribution and therefore cannot profit from it. Nicotine however, which is the key ingredient in tobacco can be regulated and taxed and is.
|-
| Why are there ducks in my pool? ||Most likely, they're looking for a place to mate. Which means you'll soon have baby ducks in your pool. Most migratory birds are protected by wildlife laws, so you want to prevent them from moving into your pool in the first place. The [http://www.dfwwildlife.org/duck.html DFW Wildlife Coalition] has some tips.
|-
| Why is Jesus white? ||This is an ethnocentric viewpoint that varies throughout cultures. In African cultures he is portrayed as black. In short, whatever culture he is introduced to, those inhabitants will have him fit their own image.
|-
| Why is there liquid in my ear? ||[http://www.healthline.com/symptom/discharge-from-ear It's called otorrhea], and can be caused by infection, trauma, or changes in pressure. A common cause is [http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/swimmers-ear/basics/definition/con-20014723 Swimmer's ear], an infection of the outer ear canal.
|-
| Why do Q tips feel good? ||The inner ear contains [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erectile_tissue erectile tissue] (as does your inner nose which is why sneezing feels good) so you are massing tissue which gets aroused upon stimulation.
|-
| Why do good people die? ||Everybody dies, no matter how good or bad they were. But sometimes if people are really bad they are made to die sooner. (But loved ones and ones who were known to make memorable or valuable contributions are mourned and revered more than a person who has left much pain to others as their legacy; we remember the good ones and so it hurts more.)
|-
| Why are ultrasounds important? ||Ultrasound scans provide a great deal of information about a fetus, thus increasing the chances of a healthy birth. They have many other medical uses.
|-
| Why are ultrasound machines expensive? ||As hospital equipment goes, ultrasound machines are actually a bargain. [http://www.costowl.com/healthcare/healthcare-ultrasound-machine-costs.html A new ultrasound machine] costs about $20,000-$75,000, depending on features. Comparable devices are much more expensive: The [http://info.blockimaging.com/bid/84432/CT-Scanner-Price-Guide CT scanner] runs $90,000-$250,000, while the [http://www.ehow.com/about_4731161_much-do-mri-machines-cost.html MRI machine] easily goes over a million.
|-
| Why is stealing wrong? ||Stealing is theft and it is illegal. Taking something that is not yours without permission or payment hurts the livelihood of other individuals as well as damages their trust in others.
|}

===Vertical Questions===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there hell if god forgives? ||There is not a single answer to this question. The answer varies based on the religion and that religion's sect mixed with personal interpretations of that religions scripture and how a person decides to follow it. However the idea of what Hell will be like also varies. There is no one answer to this question, but the easiest explanation is that the individual did not pray hard enough, correctly, was not part of the right religion, and their forgiveness was contingent on something that the person either did not do or know to do (or say or think)
|-
| Why do iguanas die? ||All living things die, but iguanas may suffer from [http://www.anapsid.org/iguana/kidneyfailure.html kidney failure].
|-
| Why is GPS free? || GPS was originally developed by the U.S. military for its own use, not for commercial purposes. However, the government realized that free GPS would have a significant bonus for the economy and would prevent disasters like the {{w|Korean Air Lines Flight 007}} where a plane was shot down after accidentally entering Soviet airspace, and in 1983 President Reagan declared that the US would make GPS available to all. At one point, "{{w|selective availability}}" was used to degrade performance for civilian users, but since 2000 this has also been switched off.
|-
| Why are trees tall? ||Tall is a relative term, and Redwoods are famous for their height - among the tallest in the world. The reason for this is, in part [http://www.nps.gov/redw/faqs.htm climate, fog, rain, good soil, few predators, among others].
|-
|Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why is there lava? ||{{w|Lava}} is magma (molten rock) which is at the Earth's surface. Magma in the Earth comes from the melting of rock due to rising heat from deeper within the planet. {{w|Earth's internal heat budget|This heat}} is about half radiogenic and half primordial (left over from the formation and differentiation of the Earth). Most of the crust and mantle of the Earth is solid rock, but in places (usually controlled by plate tectonics, but {{w|Hawaii hotspot|not always}}) where the heat is high enough the minerals with lowest melting point start to melt and then migrate upwards towards the surface. This melt collects in {{w|Magma chamber|magma chambers}}, in which the magma may start to cool and crystallize. Sometimes it will crystallize completely, becoming an underground solid body called a pluton. Other times melt will keep migrating upwards until it reaches the surface and erupts as lava, forming a {{w|volcano}} or undersea vent.
|-
| Why is YKK on a zippers? || {{w|YKK}} Group is the name of a large group of Japanese manufacturing companies, which among other things manufacture a lot of zippers.
|-
| Why is life so boring? ||It is up to an individual to find meaning and interest in life. Monotony, predictability and lack of physical and intellectual stimulation would lead to a feeling of boredom.
|-
| Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts? ||Ghosts are a supernatural phenomenon that have not been empirically proven to exist. Those who believe in ghosts implicitly believe in a soul (of which a ghost is a materialization of), and it is a commonly held belief by religious institutions and ghost-hunters that animals do not have souls and thus dinosaurs would not have any either.
|-
|Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man, and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned. Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why do I feel dizzy? ||Balance is achieved from fluids in the inner-ear, but [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dizziness#Epidemiology dizziness] can have nearly a dozen causes.
|-
| Why are dogs afraid of fireworks? ||Loud noises can trigger their flight or fight responses when they are [http://www.cesarsway.com/dogbehavior/hyperdog/How-to-Keep-Your-Dog-Safe-and-Calm-During-Fireworks nervous].
|-
| Why are there weeks? || Weeks were originally important for religious reasons, primarily the requirement to observe a sabbath (day of rest) every seventh day. Today it is used to create a common schedule that doesn't change due to month length, much like the months divide a year to be able to schedule things like dentist appointments. Similarly, hours and minutes divide a day making it possible to create a schedule.
|}

==See also==
http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/1l3na7/questions/cbvigrd, answers to all the questions.

==References==
<references/>

==Transcript==
:[This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. These are described at the end. Questions are given in roughly columnar order. None of the questions have question marks.]

:Questions found in Google Autocomplete

:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after HTTP
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arraow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:Why do testicles move
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:Why is there caffeine in my shampoo
:Why do your boobs hurt
:Why aren't economists rich
:Why do Americans call it soccer
:Why are my ears ringing
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:Why is space black
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the moon
:Why is NASA shutting down
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:Why do spiders come inside
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:Why do knees click
:Why aren't there E grades
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good
:Why is GPS free
:Why are trees tall
:Why are there slaves in the Bible
:Why do twins have different fingerprints
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons
:Why is there lava
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:Why is there phlegm
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:Why is psychic weak to bug
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space
:Why are there female Mr Mimes
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:Why is there an owl on the dollar bill
:Why do owls attack people
:Why are AK47s so expensive
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America
:Why is life so boring
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are there ducks in my pool
:Why is Jesus white
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:Why are ultrasounds important
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong
:Why is YKK on all zippers
:Why is HTTPS crossed out in red
:Why is there a line through HTTPS
:Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook
:Why is HTTPS important
:Why are there weeks
:Why do I feel dizzy
:Why are dogs afraid of fireworks
:Why is there no king in England

:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing

:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts

:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels

:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important.

:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

{{comic discussion}}
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Talk:1403: Thesis Defense

2017-01-04T06:41:53Z

162.158.255.220:

Sorry, but if your best defense is frightening counter attack a good offense will destroy you. The best defense is a good offense because a weakened or destroyed opponent can mount no offense.[[Special:Contributions/173.245.48.132|173.245.48.132]] 05:58, 4 August 2014 (UTC)BluDgeons

:Depends on type of counter attack. For example, the best defense against missiles is to fire anti-missile missiles, which may be seen as type of attack. Of course, the phrase is older than missiles, but I believe similar principles applied: not retaliation nor first strike, but attacking the enemy units which are trying to attack you. Alternatively, attacking enemy army supply lines may also force it to interrupt her attack on you. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:22, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

::No. Anti-missile missiles are an absolutely dreadful defense agaisnt missiles. Their success rate is well below 100% and has only recently risen above 0%. The actual best defense against missiles is to blow them up on the ground, before they are launched, i.e. An offensive attack. [[User:JamesCurran|JamesCurran]] ([[User talk:JamesCurran|talk]]) 20:12, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

::: You've clearly never heard of Iron Dome, Israel's missile defense system. It has crazy high success rates. I've seen it in action myself, it is glorious. --[[User:NeatNit|NeatNit]] ([[User talk:NeatNit|talk]]) 04:24, 6 August 2014 (UTC)

:::: Israel has to fire two Iron Dome missiles ($50,000 dollars each) to intercept each Qassam rocket (roughly $500 dollars), so this is a terrible example as a well resourced attacker can easily overwhelm a defender. Maybe in another decade with lasers, cheaper interceptors and rail guns the equation might have changed. {{unsigned ip|141.101.99.167}}

::::: I would say that it's better to fire two $50,000 dollar missiles than to let the rocket explode, kill several people and demolish $200,000 building. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:15, 6 August 2014 (UTC)

:::::: Adage might refer to guerilla/hit-and-run tactics, which are also mentioned in Sun Tzu's Art of War (cut off supply chain, is one instance). -[[User:Vorik111|Vorik111]] ([[User talk:Vorik111|talk]]) 16:19, 7 August 2014 (UTC)

The expression is based on a concept that is military and ancient, but I wonder if the expression itself, in English, originated with American football, sometime since the game's birth in the 1860s. It is so specifically applicable to this game, where a team's defense and offense are completely separate units, run separately and spoken of separately and yet an extremely effective way to keep the opponent from scoring is to maintain possession of the ball while the game clock ticks down. [[User:Wrybred|Wrybred]] ([[User talk:Wrybred|talk]]) 13:18, 4 August 2014 (UTC)wrybred

: While it is applicable in most attacking sports, then I seriously doubt that it originated in American Football -- I has been some time since I read {{w|Sun Tzu}}'s {{w|The Art of War}} which is one of the oldest texts in existence, but I suspect it may already be in there predating anything else [[User:Spongebog|Spongebog]] ([[User talk:Spongebog|talk]]) 22:05, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

May or may not also be inspired by Studio C: Thesis Defense http://youtu.be/Lrlro3YJ15o Teagan N {{unsigned ip|173.245.48.134}}

Can anyone make out what's written on the board? {{unsigned ip|141.101.105.220}}
: No, probably not -- [[User:Spongebog|Spongebog]] ([[User talk:Spongebog|talk]]) 21:57, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

: My best guess after resizing the image a few times is
:: [The|To] [F|Falcons?] [at|of] [T|Times?]
:: [D|Displays?] [a|is|its] [M|Moods?]
:: [by?] {illegible first name (short maybe Meg)} {illegible surname (long)
:: [C|{illegible}] [the] {illegible 1 short word 1 long word or only 1 long word}
:: {illegible mid size word} {illegible short word maybe is} {illegible short word a} {illegible} {illegible} {{unsigned|Meerkat}}

: Looks to me like "The Evolution of [Thesis/Turtle] Displays & Moods" something illegible, probably her name, followed by "Candidate for [illegible]"[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.52|141.101.98.52]]

: I read "The Evolution of Threat Displays in Murder" as the topic after lots of enlargement.[[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.207|173.245.54.207]] 14:30, 4 August 2014 (UTC)
::I'm with this reading. It's logical, too. Megan's actions, being about as far as you can go in the direction of Murderous Threat Displays, are a natural "conclusion" to her presentation.--[[User:Laverock|Laverock]] ([[User talk:Laverock|talk]]) 15:43, 5 August 2014 (UTC)

: I think it says "The Evolution of Throat Dipthongs in Murder". I'm no linguist, but if "AAAAAA" is said in an undulating fashion, it would qualify as a dipthong. Thus the presentation is incomplete without the yell. {{unsigned ip|108.162.219.154}}

: Going off on the poster above me and taking into account the topic of the comic, I think it is probably "The Evolution of Thesis Displays in Murder" [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.185|141.101.98.185]] 08:41, 5 August 2014 (UTC)

Thanks! Came here today for this, created account to say thanks :) [[User:Mathiastck|Mathiastck]] ([[User talk:Mathiastck|talk]]) 18:18, 4 August 2014 (UTC)
: You'r welcome [[User:Spongebog|Spongebog]] ([[User talk:Spongebog|talk]]) 21:59, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

"In conclusion" suggests she's almost finished with her presentation. I wonder what the panel thought of her holding a sword many times thicker than her stick-body for the duration of her defense.[[User:Alanbbent|Alanbbent]] ([[User talk:Alanbbent|talk]]) 00:00, 5 August 2014 (UTC)
: "In conclusion" is the APA style of creating a summary section -- hence she has just finished her presentation, and she is now moving on to the questions-answers with the examiners defending her thesis. [[Special:Contributions/199.27.133.6|199.27.133.6]] 13:57, 5 August 2014 (UTC)

;Incomplete?

looks to me that this pretty complete -- remove the incomplete tag? [[User:Spongebog|Spongebog]] ([[User talk:Spongebog|talk]]) 22:50, 4 August 2014 (UTC)

It's still missing the presentation text. [[User:cDave]] {{unsigned|CDave}}

:I don't think anyone can read it. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.54.201|173.245.54.201]] 03:46, 6 August 2014 (UTC)

:I'm surprised noone has referred to the transcript in the page source. It officially says, "The evolution of threat defence in mammals." [[Special:Contributions/173.245.62.73|173.245.62.73]] 06:09, 6 August 2014 (UTC)
:: Excellent observation -- I have changed the transcript to use the words from the site itself -- the transcript sections has been lacking on xkcd.com lately, which is why people probably don't check them any more. [[User:Spongebog|Spongebog]] ([[User talk:Spongebog|talk]]) 19:01, 6 August 2014 (UTC)
:::I'm sorry, but I did revert this change because it was bad layout and the title text has not to be included. Right now I did find the transcript by Randall so I will update it again. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:47, 6 August 2014 (UTC)
:::Great find, the proper update to the transcript is done. This new statement has to be explained.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 21:00, 6 August 2014 (UTC)

The best defence is to own an empire. If it is big enough it never sleeps and if it is happy enough it will counteract any threat given enough time and resources. Big enough empires generally have enough time and resources. The problem with empires is the problem with all powerful entities: Power Corrupts. That is a different adage and comparing metaphors about defence and power can mislead or change the argument not resolve the statement "" the best defence.... etc".[[User:Weatherlawyer|Weatherlawyer]] ([[User talk:Weatherlawyer|talk]]) 18:46, 8 January 2015 (UTC)

Sad story: in 1996, a grad student actually did murder people during his thesis defense: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Diego_State_University_shooting [[Special:Contributions/162.158.56.59|162.158.56.59]] 18:39, 10 December 2015 (UTC)

The title text may also refer to Stephen Sondheim's song "Putting it Together," in which the singer lists ad nauseum the minutiae of preparing and marketing a work of art, which is analagous to preparing a thesis and its defense. The final line is "and that is the state of the art", ending with a long, high note.[[Special:Contributions/162.158.255.220|162.158.255.220]] 06:41, 4 January 2017 (UTC)