explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

2014: JWST Delays

2018-07-02T16:36:07Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2014
| date = July 2, 2018
| title = JWST Delays
| image = jwst_delays.png
| titletext = Since delays should get less likely closer to the launch, most astronomers in 2018 believed the expansion of the schedule was slowing, but by early 2020 new measurements indicated that it was actually accelerating.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a DELAYED TELESCOPE - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
The {{w|James Webb Space Telescope}} (JWST) is a {{w|space telescope}} that was created to be the successor of the {{w|Hubble Space Telescope}}.

The telescope has been in development since 1996, but has been plagued by numerous delays and cost overruns. As of the time of publishing, the JWST is scheduled to launch on March 30, 2021 (but there is no guarantee on this date).

This comic portrays the launch delays and the new predicted launch years and the times at which those predictions were made. There have been so many delays in this project that you can plot a line of best fit with a high degree of accuracy. Fortunately the slope of the line is less than one, indicating a launch will happen someday. Randall is predicting based on this line that the launch will occur in year 2026.

The title text follows a similar structure to an explanation of dark energy, a force of unknown origin that's causing the universe to expand at an accelerating rate. Randall compares the JWST launch schedule to dark energy in this text.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{comic discussion}}

2014: JWST Delays

2018-07-02T16:27:34Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ introductionary explanation

440: Road Rage

2018-07-02T16:18:21Z

172.68.46.35: wikilink

{{comic
| number = 440
| date = June 23, 2008
| title = Road Rage
| image = road rage.png
| titletext = Okay, now just as the loss hits him, slam on the brakes.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Black Hat]] is driving a car, and [[Danish]] is with him in the passenger's seat. Black Hat gets annoyed because the car behind him is "{{w|tailgating}}" (in this context, the term means that the other car is following too close to the back bumper of Black Hat's car).

Danish decides to fight back, so she turns on her laptop and finds that the car behind them also has a laptop running. Since the cars are so close, the other laptop is well within WiFi range, so she manages to establish a WiFi connection with the laptop in the other car. Then, Danish finds a security hole (in the comic, a "remote exploit"). She uses it to break into the laptop and install a speech synthesizer.
This means that the laptop in the car behind just starts saying words at Danish's will.

The driver of the other car is puzzled when he starts hearing a voice. He's completely clueless about where the voice comes from. Also, he's driving alone so he's probably frightened (or nervous at least) to find that someone is speaking inside his car. The fact that the voice says "she'd be alive if it weren't for you" surely won't help him relax. The "shot in the dark" is the gamble that this statement is especially meaningful and poignant to the driver. As the driver is prone to tailgating, it seems likely that he could have caused a car accident in the past.

In the title text, Danish is continuing her revenge, asking Black Hat to slam on the brakes. Hitting the brakes is a common (though highly unsafe) way to get revenge on tailgaters. At minimum, it forces them to abruptly decelerate and hopefully frightens them, but the danger is that they don't have room to stop in time and cause a collision. The joke is that, having already achieved an incredibly complicated and psychologically painful form of revenge, Danish wants to follow it up with a much more conventional form, at the worst possible time. Since the blame for such types of accident is always given to the driver of the car behind, and since we know Black Hat is a sadistic bastard, Black Hat will no doubt enjoy adding both the blame and the traffic accident on top of what Danish has already accomplished. This may seem ironic as Black Hat and Danish would risk having their own car struck, but they would no doubt rather make an example than avoid the accident.

==Transcript==
:[Black Hat is driving and Danish who seems to be his equal is in the passenger's seat. They are closely followed by some other vehicle.]
:Black Hat: That guy's tailgating me.
:Danish: I'll take a look.

:[A car is shown to be closely behind Black Hat's car.]
:Danish: His laptop's running, probably in the back seat. And... yup, the WiFi autoconnects.

:[Close-up of Danish using a laptop.]
:Danish: Now we just scan for remote exploits... install speech synth... And take a shot in the psychological dark.

:[Cueball's car.]
:Laptop: Hello.
:Cueball: What? Who's there?
:Laptop: She'd be alive if it weren't for you.
:Cueball: ...Oh God.

==Trivia==
This may be a continuation of [[433: Journal 5]], with Black Hat taking Danish to the "date" that was mentioned.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Danish]]

Talk:1811: Best-Tasting Colors

2017-03-16T12:05:15Z

172.68.46.35:

This is obviously wrong because white chocolate is not [[378|real]] chocolate. Let the flamewar begin. --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.54.34|172.68.54.34]] 15:22, 15 March 2017 (UTC)
:Well, it's not technically chocolate, but it is a derivative -- insert math joke -- and the chart doesn't seem to be concerned with what it is, just with what it's called; after all, that which is called white chocolate by any other name would taste just as sweet, putting some off while others enjoy it. [[User:Nyperold|Nyperold]] ([[User talk:Nyperold|talk]]) 16:44, 15 March 2017 (UTC)
::As per your request: http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/626:_Newton_and_Leibniz [[Special:Contributions/172.68.34.52|172.68.34.52]] 22:08, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

Purple skittles in France taste like blueberry.{{unsigned ip|141.101.69.105}}

Vanilla isn't white.{{unsigned ip|172.68.58.131}}

What are all of the question marks here for? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.251|108.162.246.251]] 15:51, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

I think those question marks at the top are supposed to be bubble gum.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.10|108.162.245.10]] 16:03, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

I suspect this is Randall's take on Fake News™, since it contains verifiably false claims such as coffee and liquorice being bad, and candy floss being better than watermelon

[[Special:Contributions/141.101.107.66|141.101.107.66]] 16:12, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

"In the title text, Randall asserts that his rankings of colors and foods are indisputable (with the exception of chocolate). This is of course ridiculous, as everyone knows that watermelon and strawberry are inherently superior to the likes of Citrus Fruits."...but his rankings of strawberry and of watermelon (x2) are higher than for oranges, lemons, and limes. There is no contradiction here; nothing that is ridiculous. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.78.118|162.158.78.118]] 16:29, 15 March 2017 (UTC)
: Liquorice, while an acquired taste certainly doesn't belong that far down, I'd take it over a long list of other things on the chart, but then again ... I'm Scandinavian {{unsigned ip|162.158.134.178}}
:: Sweet liquorice, or salted? I'm pretty sure there should be two dots there. Also, coffee and chocolate are both missing from the right end of the 'black' row. Most of the others, I think I'd flip the line, but keep each line in the same place. I guess taste is variable in weird ways [[Special:Contributions/162.158.154.109|162.158.154.109]] 21:56, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

Hmm. The selection seems quite diverse compared to a standard bag of jelly beans, but doesn't really cover the range of a gourmet brand. I wonder where root beer falls, or Dr Pepper. And that's not even getting into color classification when the bean has more than one color. Personally, when I used to get gourmet jelly bean brands, I would do the squeeze-and-sniff test on a particular shade of brown, because it was used for both coffee and a flavor I liked. I remember Lore Sjöberg having a similar problem with cinnamon and cherry, but if he ever arrived at my solution, I don't know. [[User:Nyperold|Nyperold]] ([[User talk:Nyperold|talk]]) 16:44, 15 March 2017 (UTC)
:Interesting theory that he's talking about flavors of jelly beans, though there's really nothing to indicate he is. But I believe every one of those food flavors are included in, for example, Jelly Belly's lineup (with the possible exception of a White Chocolate flavor). [[User:N0lqu|-boB]] ([[User talk:N0lqu|talk]]) 17:00, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

I enjoy licorice and white chocolate, and I think strawberry is overrated. Fight me. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.126.16|162.158.126.16]] 17:34, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

If it is jelly beans it is definitely more agreeable then actual food. Because popcorn jelly beans are awful which explains why there a outlier. It also explains why there split by color.{{unsigned ip|172.68.58.89}}

Wow. I've seen stupidity, I've seen REAL stupidity, and now there comes this comic.{{unsigned ip|173.245.50.96}}

I'm a retard pretending i'm superior by liking certain fruits. {{unsigned ip|162.158.75.52}}

My tastes now rate sweet tastes poorly - as well as sour, so I would down rate candyfloss, but not up rate lemon. The variability of chocolate represents the range from choc flavoured sweet margarine, through to 90% coco solids. My peak preference being about 50-60%. [[User:RIIW - Ponder it|RIIW - Ponder it]] ([[User talk:RIIW - Ponder it|talk]]) 18:14, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

Patrician taste good sir. Though, I respectfully disagree with your opinion on sour only somewhat: Lemons combined with other flavors make lemons pretty dang tasty.{{unsigned ip|173.245.50.96}}

Has anyone figured out what all the question marks in the graph are for yet? [[Special:Contributions/162.158.59.190|162.158.59.190]] 20:08, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

All the question marks made me wonder if he accidentally published an early draft again or something. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.133.90|172.68.133.90]] 20:44, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

: I'm fairly sure the question marks are related to lewd matters. [[User:KromdarTheAllHungering|KromdarTheAllHungering]] ([[User talk:KromdarTheAllHungering|talk]]) 02:56, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

Hi, I added a table. Can somebody fix and fill it as I am not the best at tablework (as you can see). [[User:Dontknow|Dontknow]] ([[User talk:Dontknow|talk]]) 02:45, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

: Fixed and partially filled! [[User:Cody Code|Cody Code]] ([[User talk:Cody Code|talk]]) 03:52, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

;Transcript

As the transcript is for the visually impaired, I think the colored letters should only be used in the explanation and described [pink letters] in the transcript; what do you think? --[[User:LaVe|LaVe]] ([[User talk:LaVe|talk]]) 21:06, 15 March 2017 (UTC)
:The transcript is not only for visually impaired. Nevertheless those translation programs know colors. Be smart. And a simple bold header is enough at the discussion page.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 21:14, 15 March 2017 (UTC)

“Most people” do not like licorice; Most Americans, you mean. Licorice is extremely popular in Europe in many varieties. But they don’t like root beer. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.246.227|108.162.246.227]] 06:04, 16 March 2017 (UTC)
: AFAIR in pretty much every food item common to the US and the UK, the US version had a far larger sugar content. My theory is that salt was more expensive that sugar everywhere but the coastal regions, so preserving with sugar was the way to go and hence the apparent national "sweet tooth" [[User:RoyT|RoyT]] ([[User talk:RoyT|talk]]) 08:04, 16 March 2017 (UTC)
: Hello. As a european myself, i can assure you that Licorice is not extremly popular here, except among some loners, who are recieved and watched critically by their fellow europeans. Most people in Europe don't like it. Also, most people in Europe heard of rootbeer, but nearly noone ever drank it - i wouldn't even know where to get it here. --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.91.149|162.158.91.149]] 10:08, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

Wait, lemons? I like lemons. Anyone with an excess of raw lemons for eating should send me them. I would eat them consistently if it weren't for the fact that doing so makes my gums sore afterwards. I've several times distilled lemon juice into a much, much stronger "lemon syrup" with about 1/10th the volume and the consistency of maple syrup, and my general feeling is that I would eat it like candy if it were widely available, even though it has virtually no sugar in it. Lemon flavor is best flavor! [[Special:Contributions/172.68.133.132|172.68.133.132]] 07:51, 16 March 2017 (UTC)
: Lemon juice has plenty of sugar in it. That's why it's used for invisible ink. [[Special:Contributions/198.41.238.16|198.41.238.16]] 08:28, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

Why are those values approximate when they have four significant figures? [[Special:Contributions/198.41.238.16|198.41.238.16]] 08:28, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

How are bananas not included?

The watermelon flavor of Airheads candy is completely green. Also, many watermelon candies partially include a green part to mimic the appearance of watermelon, and even though they taste the same, may elicit a false feeling of tasting better. [[Special:Contributions/76.252.228.30|76.252.228.30]] 12:04, 16 March 2017 (UTC)

Talk:1811: Best-Tasting Colors

2017-03-16T12:02:51Z

172.68.46.35:

1799: Bad Map Projection: Time Zones

2017-02-15T17:08:06Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ ce

{{comic
| number = 1799
| date = February 15, 2017
| title = Bad Map Projection: Time Zones
| image = bad_map_projection_time_zones.png
| titletext = This is probably the first projection in cartographic history that can be criticized for its disproportionate focus on Finland, Mongolia, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo.
}}
*A [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/bad_map_projection_time_zones_2x.png double sized version] of this image can be found by clicking the image at xkcd.com - the comic's page can also be accessed by clicking on the comic number above.
*Recent comics always have a larger (often the original) drawing using ''_2x'' added to the file name to indicate a different size. Modern browsers decide which resolution is shown. But at this comic the larger version is also clickable on the image. See much more details on this under the expanded explanation for the [[:Category:Large drawings|large drawings category]].

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|[[#Table of countries and their timezones|Table]] needs to be filled out for each country, both named and unnamed that are shown in the map with explanation of its timezone and why it looks as it does on the map. (Especially Russia, China and Greenland as well as those from title text needs explanation like that). Some of the info already given in the explanation could be moved to the table. Finally all labeled countries should be listed in the transcript as well.}}

This is the second comic in the series of [[:Category:Bad Map Projections|Bad Map Projections]]. The first was released just over a month before this one and was called [[1784: Bad Map Projection: Liquid Resize]].

Notably, "Liquid Resize" was #107, while this comic features #79, so either [[Randall]] has put them in a new arbitrary order or he is counting down from least to most terrible.

Conceptually, the series is a comment on the fact that there is no perfect way to draw a map of the world on a flat piece of paper. Each one will introduce a different type of distortion, and the best projection for a given situation is sometimes very disputed. Randall previously explored 12 different projections in [[977: Map Projections]], and expressed his disdain for some types he sees as less efficient but whose users feel superior. None of them are really good as any 2D map projection will always distort in a way the spherical reality, and a map projection that is useful for one aspect (like navigation, geographical shapes and masses visualization, etc.) will not be so for all the others. Local maps of smaller areas can be quite accurate, but the idea of both these map projection comics is to map the entire globe on a flat surface.

Randall, being Randall, runs with the idea. He has made yet another map projection that is not only inaccurate, but utterly unusable, though less so than the previous one.

This comic shows a {{w|Map projection|map projection}} in which countries are placed according to the {{w|Time zone|time zones}} that they fall under. Based on the way the Sun shines on the Earth, these time zones, which are based on the sun's position in the sky, would best be divided by roughly longitudinal (North-to-South Pole) lines.

However, this is not the case in practice, as the defined time zones tend to have very jagged boundaries. Since [[Randall]] knows he cannot fix the boundaries of the time zones, he instead "fixes" the world by making a map appear to match up with the time zone system. This results in bizarre distortions such as the large, gum-like strands of Greenland and enormous gulfs in parts of northern Russia.

The effect of this map is "punish" large countries with a single time zone - for instance, China, which uses UTC+8 across the whole country - and countries that share large time zones - for instance, almost all of Europe is packed into the Central European UTC+1 zone - by shrinking these down. Conversely, countries that span multiple time zones are stretched out - for example, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, as pointed out in the alt-text - as are those that belong to very small time zones - Finland and the Baltic states look huge because they are the only countries using the UTC+2 Eastern Europe time.

Other map projections distort countries this way as well, but based on their actual physical location as opposed to their position on imaginary time zones. The {{w|Mercator projection}} is infamous for distorting Greenland in this way, to the point that it appears to be larger than Africa despite being nowhere near the same size.

The title text lampoons the fact that the same phenomenon occurs on Randall's bad map projection, but for countries that do not tend to experience this on typical projections. Several smaller countries such as Finland, Mongolia, and the DRC, appear much larger than their actual size due to being stretched across time zone boundaries.

See the [[#Table of countries and their timezones|table]] below for lots more information on the comic, but here are some further details.

Some countries look especially odd. Greenland gets some jutting out points - these are the towns of {{w|Danmarkshavn}} (UTC) and {{w|Ittoqqortoormiit}} (UTC-1), which use different time zones to the rest of the island - while Russia gets big holes in it in places where there is a 2 hour time zone difference between states. For instance, in reality {{w|Komi}} and {{w|Khanty-Mansi}} touch each other. However, Komi uses Moscow time (UTC+3) and Khanty-Mansi uses Yekaterinburg Time (UTC+5). There is no state between them using UTC+4, so Randall draws a big gap in northern Russia here.

The map is imperfect since it doesn't allow for half-hour time zones (India, for instance, is on UTC+5.5). Instead, countries that use fractional time zones are shifted so they straddle the two time zones, and are then marked with an asterisk (*). There's also no mention of daylight savings - all countries shown are given the base winter time. Depending on the time of year, countries will shift around - around June, many northern hemisphere countries will move east, while some southern hemisphere countries will move east around December. Randall attempts to preserve adjacencies where possible - for instance, Chad and Sudan are neighbors even though Chad uses West Africa Time (UTC+1) and Sudan uses East Africa Time (UTC+3). Randall draws an extremely thin strand connecting the countries though Central/South Africa Time (UTC+2), even though no part of Chad or Sudan uses this time. Similarly, a thin strand of Kazakhstan and Turkmenistan is shown projecting into the UTC+4 time zone in order to separate Russia and Iran, which do not really share a border.

Australia has most of these peculiar timezone as there is a section in the center of Australia with half hour time zone, so it's marked with the *, but it is not the entire country, so the * is not behind the name as it is for instance with India. Also, the only extra detail mentioned in the map is for Australia. It is the {{w|UTC%2B08:45|UTC+8:45}} time zone that are listed, used only by 5 roadhouses in South Australia and Western Australia covering a population of only a few hundred people.

There are several labeling errors in the map. See [[#Errors|below]].

==Table of countries and their timezones==
*This table should include all countries not just those labeled.
**Also continents should be mentioned as they are also more or less distorted not necessarily depending on the distortion of the countries within.
*The labels used should be noted first, and the full country name (with wiki link) should be mentioned if abbreviations has been used in a bracket after.
*Timezone(s) for the country should be listed.
*Clear distortion shown in the image should be described
*Explanation for that based on timezone as well as other interesting details can be noted.

{| class="wikitable"
! Country/Continent
! Timezone(s)
! Distortions
! Explanation
|-
| Add more - just several examples made so far: || || ||
|-
| BEL ({{w|Belarus}}) || UTC+3 || || Belarus lies entirely in the UTC+3 timezone yet the map depicts a small strip of land in the UTC+2 zone. This is most likely to allow for Belarus to have a common border with Poland even though the countries do not have two consecutive timezones (Poland uses UTC+1)
|-
| {{w|China}} || UTC+8 || Heavily squashed horizontally, with finger-like tendrils to the west || All of China is in UTC+8. However, it reaches as far west as Tajikistan, in UTC+5, and even has an extremely short border with Afghanistan in UTC+4.5. A border is also shown with Pakistan - this is disputed by some who support India in the {{w|Kashmir conflict}}, but represents the ''de facto'' {{w|Line of Control}} between India and Pakistan.
|-
| {{w|Central Europe}}/{{w|Western Europe}} (not labeled) || UTC+0 – UTC+3 || Compressed with the countries of central and western Europe pressed closer in east-west direction while eastern countries are stretched in all directions. ||
{{w|Portugal}} is the only country in mainland Europe which uses UTC+0 – that's why it sticks out a bit towards the British Isles which use UTC+0 as well. {{w|Iceland}} is here, too.

Most of Europe uses UTC+1 but these countries in reality spread over a much larger area than just one zone. This is why central and western countries are so compressed.

The eastern countries (except Belarus and the European part of Russia but not the Kaliningrad exclave) use UTC+2. These are: {{w|Finland}}, {{w|Latvia}}, {{w|Estonia}}, {{w|Lithuania}}, {{w|Belarus}}, {{w|Moldova}}, {{w|Ukraine}}, {{w|Bulgaria}}, {{w|Romania}} and {{w|Greece}}. In reality, they occupy a smaller area on the map, but on Randall's map they are stretched to fill the UTC+2 zone strip.

Belarus, most of the European part of Russia and Crimea use UTC+3. See below for peculiarities regarding Russia and Ukraine.

Finland looks specifically distorted, partly because in reality it borders with {{w|Norway}} on the north, and Norway uses UTC+1. On Randall's map Norway is compressed into UTC+1 strip and Finland suddenly got some coast on Barents Sea. Poland (abbreviated ''POL.'' on the map) and Belarus (''BEL'') have common border but differ by two time zones, Poland uses UTC+1 but Belarus uses UTC+3 (Moscow time). Therefore on the map they have protruding 'fingers', touching one another, squeezed between Lithuania and Latvia on the north and Ukraine on the south.

Randall got Turkey a bit wrong, however: its European part is stretched into UTC+2 zone, but in reality Turkey uses UTC+3 on its whole territory.
|-
| {{w|Greenland}}|| UTC-4 – UTC+0 || Two landmasses strechted from the rest of the country || Greenland stretches from UTC-4 to UTC+0 with most of the country being UTC-3. UTC-4 is only applicable to Thule Air Base in the southern part of the Hayes-Peninsula, UTC-1 and UTC+0 is used in smaller areas on the east coast of Greenland. Even though UTC-2 is not used in Greenland at all, the country is depicted as a single landmass with two small strips of land connecting the UTC-1 and UTC+0 landmasses. These two strips should be considered infinitesimally thin but depicted to clarify the two areas are not separate islands but connected with the rest of Greenland.
|-
| {{w|Iceland}} || UTC+0 || No shape distortions, but different location. || Iceland, even if it geographically lies mostly within the UTC-1 time zone, uses UTC+0. It is therefore moved east on Randall's map.
|-
| {{w|Russia}} || UTC+2 – UTC+12 || Three deep troughs almost cutting Russia into pieces, but not quite, also eastern parts stick out of proportion relative to Eastern Asian countries. ||
Russia has {{w|Time_in_Russia|a peculiar}} usage of time zones, therefore it is the most distorted country on Randall's map. It covers eleven time zones but uses them very unevenly. Each of {{w|Federal subjects of Russia|constituent entities}} of Russia (also called federal subjects) uses a specific time zone throughout its territory, but the assignments are somewhat arbitrary.

* UTC+2 is used in {{w|Kaliningrad Oblast}} only, an {{w|exclave}} on {{w|Baltic Sea}} between {{w|Poland}} and {{w|Lithuania}}. On Randall's map it can be seen as a small green patch north-east of Poland.
* UTC+3 is used throughout most of the European part of Russia including Northern Caucasian republics, covering 49 constituent entities of the Russian Federation in total. These parts constitute the easternmost mass of Russia on Randall's map, stretching from the {{w|Black Sea}} in the south including the area between the Black Sea and {{w|Caspian Sea}} to the {{w|White Sea|White}}, {{w|Barents Sea|Barents}} and {{w|Kara Sea|Kara}} seas in the north and includes the arctic archipelagoes of {{w|Novaya Zemlya}} and {{w|Franz Josef Land}} as seen in the upper part of the map.
* UTC+4 is used in {{w|Udmurtia}}, {{w|Astrakhan Oblast}}, {{w|Samara Oblast}}, {{w|Saratov Oblast}} and {{w|Ulyanovsk Oblast}}, forming three disjoint areas lying more or less along the Ural mountains on their eastern side. Astrakhan Oblast has coast on the Caspian Sea. Saratov and Samara oblasts have a common border and lie somewhat to the north-east of Astrakhan Oblast. Udmurtia lies still somewhat to the north. On Randal's map they are represented by a patch of land north-east to the Caspian Sea. Further north there's a huge 'bay' reflecting the time-gap between northern parts of Russia that use either UTC+3 or UTC+5 but not UTC+4, even if they are adjacent to each other.
* UTC+5 is used by the administrative parts lying on and close to {{w|Ural mountains}}, both on western and eastern sides of them, also covering major part of {{w|West_Siberian_Plain|Western Siberia}}. These include {{w|Bashkortostan}}, {{w|Perm Krai}}, {{w|Kurgan Oblast}}, {{w|Orenburg Oblast}}, {{w|Sverdlovsk Oblast}}, {{w|Tyumen Oblast}}, {{w|Chelyabinsk Oblast}}, {{w|Khanty-Mansi Autonomous Okrug}} and {{w|Yamalo-Nenets Autonomous Okrug}}. The lands are represented on the Randall's map by the second-from-the-left major land mass within Russia. These parts border mostly with areas utilizing either UTC+3 or UTC+7, therefore Randall has drawn huge patches of sea on both sides. In the north, one can recognize somewhat distorted shapes of the {{w|Yamal Peninsula|Yamal}} and {{w|Gydan_Peninsula|Gydan}} peninsulas.
* UTC+6 is used solely by the {{w|Omsk Oblast}} in the southeastern {{w|Siberia}}, bordering {{w|Khazakhstan}}. On Randall's map it is shown as a strip of land joining the second and the third land mass from the left, just to the left of the ''RUSSIA'' inscription. However, taking account of the relatively small area of the Omsk Oblast, it should have been much thinner.
* UTC+7 is used by federal subjects located in central and parts of eastern and western {{w|Siberia}}: {{w|Altai Republic}}, {{w|Tuva}} Republic, Republic of {{w|Khakassia}}, {{w|Altai Krai}}, {{w|Krasnoyarsk Krai}}, {{w|Kemerovo Oblast}}, {{w|Novosibirsk Oblast}} and {{w|Tomsk Oblast}}.
* UTC+8 is used by {{w|Buryatia}} and {{w|Irkutsk Oblast}} only, which lie in eastern Siberia, on both sides of {{w|Lake Baikal}} (not shown on the map).

A notable thing is that Russian railways use Moscow time (UTC+3) exclusively, all timetables are expressed in this time.

|-
| UK ({{w|United Kingdom}}) || UTC+0 || None || The country is fully within the single time zone used for the country. UK defined the timezones so their time zone is by definition the one with UTC+0 (or GMT).
|-
| {{w|Ukraine}} || UTC+2 (UTC+3 in disputed regions) || Crimea stretched from the rest of the country || Since the {{w|annexation of Crimea by the Russian Federation}}, the peninsula has used Moscow time (UTC+3). The sovereignty of Crimea is disputed, but it is currently ''de facto'' controlled by Russia, and Randall colors it like Russia. Two breakaway provinces in the east, Donetsk and Luhansk, also use Moscow time. These are not shown.
|-
| Copy this line and the line above and set in directly under another entry || || ||
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|All the names on the countries}}
:[This transcript will note everything readable from the 2x zoom version found by clicking the comic on xkcd.]

:[Caption at the top of the panel:]
:Bad map projection #79:
:<big>Time Zones</big>
:Where each country '''''should''''' be, based on its time zone(s)

:[Below the caption there is a map of the world divided and colored by political boundaries, with outlines around each continent in black and around each country in dark gray. Antarctica is not included. Bodies of water are white, and countries in pale shades of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple. The map is clearly distorted, with Europa and Africa in the center, but not all continents or countries looks wrong. Africa, Australia and North America seems least distorted. But the bottom part of of South America is very slim, Greenland has two chewing gum like blobs stretched away from it to the right, Iceland is over the UK, and most of Europe has been compressed. Finland though is too large. In Africa especially Dem. Rep. the Congo has been enlarged. The worst distortion is in Asia, where especially Russia looks weird with three deep troughs down the length of the country and the end to the right seems to be much longer than usually. But also China is completely wrong as it has been compressed, Mongolia taking up most of its usual position.]

:[Most countries over a certain size have their name listed in a gray font. Small countries like Ireland and Haiti has their name listed because it can be noted in the oceans around them. Most other countries have the name inside the country, but if there is not enough room abbreviation are used like Germany which has Ger. noted. There are though several small countries in the middle of Europa which has no name, as there are simply not enough space for even an abbreviation. This is countries like Belgium, The Netherlands and Denmark a long the coast towards England (with not enough Ocean space either for the name) and the small central countries like Austria, Switzerland and Luxembourg. There are also a few specialties mentioned when time zones are not divided in full hours, for instance a foot note regarding half hour time zones. Below all the mentioned countries will be listed starting from the left, going through each (political) continent from top left and down, and the same for each country in the continent:]

:[North America:]
:Canada
:United States
:Mexico
:Cuba
:Haiti
:Jam.
:D.R

:[Central America:]
:Gua.
:Hon.
:Nic.
:CR.
:Pan.

:[South America:]
:Columbia
:...
:
:Argentina

:[Europa:]
:Greenland
:Iceland
:Ireland
:UK
:Norway
:...
:
:
:Bulgaria

:[Africa:]
:W.S.
:Algeria
:Tunis
:...
:
:
:
:South Africa
:Madagascar

:[Asia:]
:Russia
:
:
:...
:Iran*
:Afghanistan*
:...
:
:...
:Russia
:...
:
:...
:India*
:Nepal*
:...
:Bur*
:...
:
:
:...
:China
:N.K*
:S.K.
:Japan

:[Oceania:]
:Malaysia
:Indonesia
:Philippines
:Papua New Guinea

:[Australia. In the country there is a star * in the middle of it above the name:]
:<nowiki>*</nowiki>
:Australia
:New Zealand

:[Below Australia there is an arrow pointing to a pointing the south cost and below that a foot note for the stars * used above:]
:UTC +8:45
:(One small area)
:<nowiki>*</nowiki>=Half-hour offset

===Errors===
* Randall mixes up Morocco and Western Sahara (a disputed territory)
* {{w|East Thrace}}, the European portion of Turkey, is shown in Eastern European time (UTC+2). Actually, like the rest of Turkey, it uses UTC+3
* Suriname and French Guiana also have switched labels.
* Nepal's time zone is UTC+5:45
* Estonia is shown sharing a border with Finland - in fact, the two countries are separated by the {{w|Gulf of Finland}}. This sea should run to St Petersburg in Russia - instead, the city is shown as landlocked.
* Norway should border Russia. See {{w|Norway–Russia border}}.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Maps]]
[[Category:Bad Map Projections]]

1794: Fire

2017-02-03T17:37:10Z

172.68.46.35: clarify

{{comic
| number = 1794
| date = February 3, 2017
| title = Fire
| image = fire.png
| titletext = Billy Joel briefly detained
}}

==Explanation==
In the United States and Canada, the terms {{w|Multiple-alarm fire|one-alarm fire, two-alarm fire, and three-alarm fire}} are used to categorize the level of response to fires by local authorities. The term multiple-alarm fire is also used to indicate a severe fire.

A newspaper is shown reporting on a fire at a fire-alarm factory. However, due to the very nature of the location, the alarms in the factory (all of which are apparently functioning regardless of state) have been set off, leading to the event being described as a "50,000-alarm fire", which does not relate necessarily to the severity of the fire, but to the number of alarms that have been triggered in the factory.

The illustration shows visible sound waves from the alarms, which would be impossible to capture in real life ([https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKXOucXB4a8 unless it's a video recording at several thousand frames per second]).

The title text mentions the musician {{w|Billy Joel}} being questioned as a suspect for the fire, which is a reference to his song "[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFTLKWw542g We Didn't Start the Fire]". In other words, Billy Joel claims that he is not responsible for the fire at the alarm factory.

==Transcript==
[The panel shows the front page of a newspaper and several unreadable sections left of, right of, and below the main front page news. A large heading is written above a photo. In the photo an alarm factory is on fire, with "alarm" symbols depicting sound waves. Below the headline and below the picture are black lines indicating the main text in the article.]

:Headline: '''50,000-Alarm Fire at Alarm Factory'''

{{comic discussion}}

1794: Fire

2017-02-03T17:14:20Z

172.68.46.35: change - refers to x-alarm fire designation

{{comic
| number = 1794
| date = February 3, 2017
| title = Fire
| image = fire.png
| titletext = Billy Joel briefly detained
}}

==Explanation==
In the United States and Canada, the terms {{w|Multiple-alarm fire|one-alarm fire, two-alarm fire, and three-alarm fire}} are used to categorize the level of response to fires by local authorities. The term multiple-alarm fire is also used to indicate a severe fire.

A newspaper is shown reporting on a fire at a fire-alarm factory. However, due to the very nature of the location, the alarms in the factory (all of which are apparently functioning regardless of state) have been set out, leading to the event being described as a "50,000-alarm fire", which does not relate necessarily to the severity of the fire, but to the number of alarms in the factory.

The illustration shows visible sound waves from the alarms, which would be impossible to capture in real life. {{Citation needed}}

The title text mentions the musician Billy Joel being arrested, which is a reference to his music [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFTLKWw542g We Didn't Start The Fire]. In other words, Billy Joel claims that he is not responsible for the fire at the alarm factory.

==Transcript==
[The front page of a newspaper and several unreadable sections left of, right of, and below the main front page news. A large heading is written above a photo. In the photo an alarm factory is on fire, with "alarm" symbols blaring. Below the headline and below the picture are black lines indicating the main text in the article.]

:Headline:'''50,0000 Alarm Fire at Alarm Factory'''

{{comic discussion}}

1794: Fire

2017-02-03T17:12:37Z

172.68.46.35: explanation

{{comic
| number = 1794
| date = February 3, 2017
| title = Fire
| image = fire.png
| titletext = Billy Joel briefly detained
}}

==Explanation==
In the United States and Canada, the terms one-alarm fire, two-alarm fire, and three-alarm fire are used to categorize the level of response to fires by local authorities.

A newspaper is shown reporting on a fire at a fire-alarm factory. However, due to the very nature of the location, the alarms in the factory (all of which are apparently functioning regardless of state) have been set out, leading to the event being described as a "50,000-alarm fire", as one fire has set off many more alarms than would usually be triggered. The illustration shows visible sound waves from the alarms, which would be impossible to capture in real life. {{Citation needed}}

The title text mentions the musician Billy Joel being arrested, which is a reference to his music [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFTLKWw542g We Didn't Start The Fire]. In other words, Billy Joel claims that he is not responsible for the fire at the alarm factory.

==Transcript==
[The front page of a newspaper and several unreadable sections left of, right of, and below the main front page news. A large heading is written above a photo. In the photo an alarm factory is on fire, with "alarm" symbols blaring. Below the headline and below the picture are black lines indicating the main text in the article.]

:Headline:'''50,0000 Alarm Fire at Alarm Factory'''

{{comic discussion}}

1794: Fire

2017-02-03T17:03:48Z

172.68.46.35: /* Transcript */ transcript edits

{{comic
| number = 1794
| date = February 3, 2017
| title = Fire
| image = fire.png
| titletext = Billy Joel briefly detained
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BOT - Please change this comment when editing this page.}}

==Transcript==
[The front page of a newspaper and several unreadable sections left of, right of, and below the main front page news. A large heading is written above a photo. In the photo an alarm factory is on fire, with "alarm" symbols blaring. Below the headline and below the picture are black lines indicating the main text in the article.]

:Headline:'''50,0000 Alarm Fire at Alarm Factory'''

{{comic discussion}}

1790: Sad

2017-01-25T18:00:46Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ copyedit, add links

{{comic
| number = 1790
| date = January 25, 2017
| title = Sad
| image = sad.png
| titletext = With the right 90-degree rotation, any effect is a side effect.
}}

==Explanation==
In this comic, Cueball makes several comments or complaints about Ponytail which are semi-common in regular life. The humor is with Ponytail's responses which subvert the question, by taking them too literally, in a different light than expected, or undermining them completely.

In order:

Cueball's comment about projects having no progress is presumably with regard to real-life projects of importance. {{w|Stardew Valley}} is a video game in which a player creates and manages a virtual farm, and in fact managing it can be considered a complicated project. Ponytail's reply is a great counterexample of how she is making good progress in a project, albeit a virtual one which doesn't matter.

Cueball's comment about not being able to hide from everything is a common one for insular people or for those trying to run away from their problems. Ponytail's reply is in the form of a {{w|PolitiFact.com|PolitiFact}} reply, claiming (possibly quite truly) that such assertions are false.

Cueball's comment about writing comments is in regard to software development. {{w|Comment (computer programming)|Comments}} are something a programmer adds to their code such to make a note for themselves or others, typically to explain a complicated piece of logic or explaining external dependencies of a piece of code. His statement implies that Ponytail was not using the for this purpose, instead writing unrelated notes filled with obscenities. Ponytail's reply is one of typical advice given to amateur fiction and non-fiction writers, that to "write what you know." This has additional humor suggesting that Ponytail knows obscenity well.

Cueball's comment about functions is another software development related idea. {{w|Subroutine|Function}}s are pieces of logic which developers create to "do things" (such as "calculate the diameter of a circle based on its radius"). A function which does nothing is literally useless. Ponytail replies that doing nothing is in line with {{w|functional programming}}, that she is trying to avoid {{w|Side effect (computer science)|side effects}} (i.e. unexpected, unintended, and typically unwanted effects upon calling a piece of code). This is typically a good thing. Cueball correctly states that by doing nothing that one avoids all effects, again harkening back to the fact that Ponytail's code is literally useless. Ponytail then replies saying that doing nothing is the "only way to be sure," which is possibly a reference to a common quote from the Alien movie series.

The title text is a pun on the idea of the phrase "side effect." If you turn something 90 degrees you will place it on its side, so thus making it a effect of putting something on its side, or a "side effect."

Ponytail's despondence is likely in response to {{w|Donald Trump}}'s election as 45th president of the United States. The title "Sad" is a common interjection in Trump's tweets. The time-frame of "the past few months" from the first panel is consistent with this, as the election was on November 8, 2016, and the comic was posted on January 25, 2017. The reference to fact-checking in the second panel is also reminiscent of the election and post-election coverage.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
[Cueball is looking at Ponytail on a computer.] 
Cueball: How are you doing? 
Ponytail: Hah. 
Cueball: You seem distant lately. For the past few months. 
Ponytail: Can't imagine why. 

Cueball (offscreen): Your projects have stagnated. 
Ponytail: But my Stardew Valley farm is doing great. 
Cueball (offscreen): You can't just hide from everything. 
Ponytail: FACT CHECK: Mostly false. 

Cueball: I'm glad you're including more comments in your code, but it would be nice if they were comments about your code. Or at least a bit less obscenity-filled. 
Ponytail: They say to write what you know. 

[Cueball leans forward] 
Cueball: All the functions you've written take everything passed to them and return it unchanged with the comment "NO, YOU DEAL WITH THIS." 
Ponytail: It's a functional programming thing. Avoiding side effects. 
Cueball: You avoid all effects. 
Ponytail: Only way to be sure. 

[Title Text] 
With the right 90-degree rotation, any effect is a side effect.

{{comic discussion}}

1789: Phone Numbers

2017-01-25T17:50:30Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ copyedit

{{comic
| number = 1789
| date = January 23, 2017
| title = Phone Numbers
| image = phone_numbers.png
| titletext = Texting should work. Unless the message is too long, in which case it gets converted to voicemails, and I think I'm locked out of my voicemail.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Major revisions just made on Tuesday 24th. Have a look and correct typos etc.}}

[[Cueball]], who again represents [[Randall]] as given from the caption below the comic, has several phone numbers stored for [[White Hat]] under his contact entry on his phone and asks him which number he should generally use.

Often, people who have known each other for a long time may have old information recorded for each other, which may no longer be accurate. For instance, if they know each other from when {{w|Mobile phone|cell phones}} were still rather new, they would have had a {{w|landline telephone|home phone}} number also. More and more people have discontinued their land lines and now only keep the cell phone number.

Cueball has five numbers for White Hat, listed here as #1 to #5 as they are numbered in the comic (and not the order he mentions them):
#'''Cell phone''': The first number White Hat mentions is actually White Hat's cell phone; so usually this would be the number you should use as first priority, but not so with White Hat.
#'''Google Voice''': White Hat then goes on to say he should use his {{w|Google Voice}}. It is not stated that this is #2, but the other four are numbered. The reason Cueball should use this is that it will forward to White Hat's laptop, although only if his laptop is connected to WiFi.
#'''Always works''': The third number, the fourth he mentions always works, but for some reason it cannot do sms text messages. This could of course be because this is a landline (see #4).
#'''This can be deleted?''': This is the last number White Hat mentions. This number could also have been White Hat's landline which would now be discontinued (but see #3), or a previous cell number. White Hat states that it can be deleted. But then on second thought he adds an "I think" So even this number cannot be deleted from Cueball's phone. The title text most likely refers to this number, as it is the last he has mentioned in the main comic.
#'''Work number''': The fifth number, mentioned third, is White Hat's work number (maybe he has an office, or it's just an official number for his business). But this is indifferent as it just forwards all calls directly to #1, the cell phone.

White Hat does say that Cueball should use #2, the Google Voice number. This is a telephone service that provides call forwarding and voicemail services, voice and text messaging for Google customers. [https://blog.google/products/google-voice/ringing-2017-updates-our-google-voice-apps/ Google is updating Google Voice] and it may be the first time in 5 years{{Citation needed}}, so that is probably the reason for the comic as the update came out rather late on the day when Google made the announcement of the update.

However, he then makes it clear that this will only work when he is online with his laptop on a WiFi connection. This could be his way of saying that he only wishes to talk to Cueball when he is in such a position.

However he also explains the other numbers more or less making it clear how he could be reached. And all in all it seems like his cell phone is still the best way to reach him.

Today on smartphones it could be possible in your contact list to save such tedious details about each number (such as "should always work but doesn't accept texts.") But who wishes to do so? Also not all cell phones do have this option, and maybe at best you can only label the numbers as "work", "home" or "cell" but not to the detail that White Hat provides.

In the caption below Randall explains that this kind of trouble with getting the correct number for people he wish to contact is one (another) of more (several?) reasons he never calls people. Today there are so many other methods of getting into contact, also even if texting is out of the questions as well. Skype, messenger, other social networking platforms like Facebook and of course the old way of sending a letter or talking in person...

White Hat's answer reveals a complicated history of communication practices. This cobbled-together personal technology is a common theme for Randall, see [[1254: Preferred Chat System]] for another example, where Voicemail, text and Google Voice is also mentioned (and mixed in with written letter if not real mail).

The title text must refer to one of the five numbers saying that texting works for one of the numbers. This should then not be #3. It could be the number he says Cueball should use #2, but it seems more likely that it is an amendment to the last I think for #4. Maybe he realizes that this is the number he used to receive text on, when his #3 number was all he had and since that could not receive text he got the number which is now #4.

In either case the number he talks about can in fact receive text - but if #4 it can probably not receive phone calls. And then it gets weird because if the text gets too long then the message goes to {{w|voicemail}}. This is of course nonsense as a text message cannot just turn in to a spoken message. (Though of course there are text-to-speech programs, but as this takes up more space than text on a server, it would make no sense).

To cap it up, just in case it did turn into a voicemail, it would not make any difference because White Hat has been locked out of his voicemail.

It is not uncommon that young people never use voicemail and expect people to text them rather than leave a message. This could be a problem for them if "old" people call to let them know of a job they have been offered etc. So it is likely that Randall also jokes about this by letting White Hat be indifferent to having been locked out of his voicemail.

==Transcript==
:[White Hat is looking at a smartphone held out by Cueball]
:Cueball: I have five phone numbers for you. Which one should I use?
:White Hat: That first one is my cell- you should use the Google Voice one, since it will forward to my laptop if I'm on WiFi. #5 is my work number, which just forwards to #1. #3 should always work but can't do texts.
:White Hat: You can delete #4. I think.

:[Caption under the panel:] Another reason I never call people.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Smartphones]]

1789: Phone Numbers

2017-01-25T17:46:26Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ copyedit

{{comic
| number = 1789
| date = January 23, 2017
| title = Phone Numbers
| image = phone_numbers.png
| titletext = Texting should work. Unless the message is too long, in which case it gets converted to voicemails, and I think I'm locked out of my voicemail.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Major revisions just made on Tuesday 24th. Have a look and correct typos etc.}}

[[Cueball]], who again represents [[Randall]] as given from the caption below the comic, has several phone numbers stored for [[White Hat]] under his contact entry on his phone and asks him which number he should generally use.

Often, people who have known each other for a long time may have old information recorded for each other, which may no longer be accurate. For instance, if they have know each other from when {{w|Mobile phone|cell phones}} were still rather new, they would have had a {{w|landline telephone|home phone}} number also. More and more people have discontinued their land lines and now only keep the cell phone number.

Cueball has five numbers for White Hat, listed here as #1 to #5 as they are numbered in the comic (and not the order he mentions them):
#'''Cell phone''': The first number White Hat mentions is actually White Hat's cell phone; so usually this would be the number you should use as first priority, but not so with White Hat.
#'''Google Voice''': White Hat then goes on to say he should use his {{w|Google Voice}}. It is not stated that this is #2, but the other four are numbered. The reason Cueball should use this is that it will forward to White Hat's laptop, although only if his laptop is connected to WiFi.
#'''Always works''': The third number, the fourth he mentions always works, but for some reason it cannot do sms text messages. This could of course be because this is a landline (see #4).
#'''This can be deleted?''': This is the last number White Hat mentions. This number could also have been White Hat's landline which would now be discontinued (but see #3), or a previous cell number. White Hat states that it can be deleted. But then on second thought he adds an "I think" So even this number cannot be deleted from Cueball's phone. The title text most likely refers to this number, as it is the last he has mentioned in the main comic.
#'''Work number''': The fifth number, mentioned third, is White Hat's work number (maybe he has an office, or it's just an official number for his business). But this is indifferent as it just forwards all calls directly to #1 the cell phone.

White Hat does say that Cueball should use #2 the Google Voice. This is a telephone service that provides call forwarding and voicemail services, voice and text messaging for Google customers. [https://blog.google/products/google-voice/ringing-2017-updates-our-google-voice-apps/ Google is updating Google Voice] and it may be the first time in 5 years{{Citation needed}}, so that is probably the reason for the comic as the update came out rather late on the day when Google made the announcement of the update.

However, he then makes it clear that this will only work when he is online with his laptop on a WiFi connection. This could be his way of saying that he only wishes to talk to Cueball when he is in such a position.

However he also explains the other numbers more or less making it clear how he could be reached. And all in all it seems like his cell phone is still the best way to reach him.

Today on smartphones it could be possible in your contact list to save such tedious details about each number (such as "should always work but doesn't accept texts.") But who wishes to do so? Also not all cell phones do have this option, and maybe at best you can only label the numbers as "work", "home" or "cell" but not to the detail that White Hat provides.

In the caption below Randall explains that this kind of trouble with getting the correct number for people he wish to contact is one (another) of more (several?) reasons he never calls people. Today there are so many other methods of getting into contact, also even if texting is out of the questions as well. Skype, messenger, other social networking platforms like Facebook and of course the old way of sending a letter or talking in person...

White Hat's answer reveals a complicated history of communication practices. This cobbled-together personal technology is a common theme for Randall, see [[1254: Preferred Chat System]] for another example, where Voicemail, text and Google Voice is also mentioned (and mixed in with written letter if not real mail).

The title text must refer to one of the five numbers saying that texting works for one of the numbers. This should then not be #3. It could be the number he says Cueball should use #2, but it seems more likely that it is an amendment to the last I think for #4. Maybe he realizes that this is the number he used to receive text on, when his #3 number was all he had and since that could not receive text he got the number which is now #4.

In either case the number he talks about can in fact receive text - but if #4 it can probably not receive phone calls. And then it gets weird because if the text gets too long then the message goes to {{w|voicemail}}. This is of course nonsense as a text message cannot just turn in to a spoken message. (Though of course there are text-to-speech programs, but as this takes up more space than text on a server, it would make no sense).

To cap it up, just in case it did turn into a voicemail, it would not make any difference because White Hat has been locked out of his voicemail.

It is not uncommon that young people never use voicemail and expect people to text them rather than leave a message. This could be a problem for them if "old" people call to let them know of a job they have been offered etc. So it is likely that Randall also jokes about this by letting White Hat be indifferent to having been locked out of his voicemail.

==Transcript==
:[White Hat is looking at a smartphone held out by Cueball]
:Cueball: I have five phone numbers for you. Which one should I use?
:White Hat: That first one is my cell- you should use the Google Voice one, since it will forward to my laptop if I'm on WiFi. #5 is my work number, which just forwards to #1. #3 should always work but can't do texts.
:White Hat: You can delete #4. I think.

:[Caption under the panel:] Another reason I never call people.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Smartphones]]

1707: xkcd Phone 4

2017-01-24T23:00:15Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1707
| date = July 15, 2016
| title = xkcd Phone 4
| image = xkcd_phone_4.png
| titletext = The SpaceX system carefully guides falling phones down to the surface, a process which the phones increasingly often survive without exploding.
}}

==Explanation==
This is the fourth entry in the ongoing [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phone series]], and once again, the comic plays with many standard tech buzzwords to create a phone that sounds impressive but would actually be very impractical.

From the top-left, going clockwise:
*'''18,000 μAh (micro-Ampere hours) nickel-lithium-iron battery (non-rechargeable)''' Phone battery capacity is measured in {{w|ampere-hour}}s (which thanks to the magic of {{w|dimensional analysis}}, is just an unusual way of denoting electric charge, which equals 3600 Coulombs). Usually, the capacity is quoted in milliampere-hours (one-thousandth, or 10-3, of an ampere hour); however, this one is quoted in ''micro''ampere-hours (one-millionth, or 10-6, of an ampere-hour), presumably as a marketing ploy to give a more impressive-looking number. Quoted in more standard terms, this phone's battery capacity is 18 mAh. In comparison, an iPhone 6+ has a battery capacity of 2,750 mAh. This phone's battery is dreadful (under a typical current draw of 0.1A, it would power the phone for about 11 minutes). There is nothing normally called a "nickel-lithium-iron battery" - rather, this seems to be a [[739|malamanteau]] of the experimental {{w|nickel–lithium battery}} and the common {{w|lithium ion battery}} (which does not contain any iron) or the lithium-iron-phosphate battery, often called lithium-iron, but more often called the LiFePO battery. The {{w|nickel–iron battery}} may contain {{w|lithium hydroxide}}, but it's ''terrible'' for most applications. Worse, this battery is non-rechargeable, meaning that it would have to be replaced to use the phone again after it is exhausted (every 11 minutes, at that!).
**[[XKCD Phone 3]] was powered by two {{w|AA battery|AA batteries}} (not included), which have an energy capacity roughly 100 times larger.
**Many devices have a small second battery which is only used for keeping the clock time. This could be such a battery.
*'''Subwoofer''' - A {{w|subwoofer}} is a large bass speaker, which this is not. Some phones do have high-quality speakers for playing music, but these are not placed right next to the earpiece - this would be a surefire way to deafen your users. When put next to Dog Whistle, this is probably a pun, since both relate to dogs; the English onomatopoeia for the sound a dog makes is "Woof".
*'''"Dog whistle"''' - A {{w|dog whistle}} is a high-pitched whistle that humans cannot hear, but dogs can. In speaker terminology, a bass speaker is called a {{w|woofer}} because it could reproduce the low pitch of a dog bark. A treble speaker is a {{w|tweeter}}; if this "whistle" is actually a speaker, it might be termed a ''supertweeter''. The scare quotes may be a reference to "dog-whistle politics", in which certain phrases have a particular meaning to a segment of the audience that passes unnoticed by the rest. This allows a candidate to surreptitiously signal agreement with that group, without alienating the rest of the audience, among whom the ideas might be unpopular if plainly stated.
**[[xkcd Phone 2]] contained a "dog noticer".
*'''Non-porous, washable''' - On the one hand, it's rare for a phone to be made of porous materials. On the other, there are legitimately waterproof phones that seal the speakers and ports with rubber.
**[[xkcd Phone 2]] was also washable (though only once).
*'''''WebMD'' partnership: cough-activated feature reads aloud a random diagnosis for "coughing"''' - {{w|WebMD}} is a website to help people diagnose themselves. For the vast majority of people, a cough just means an irritated throat or maybe a cold, but selecting randomly from all WebMD diagnoses gives some much more ominous - if very unlikely - ones, including {{w|ricin}} poisoning, {{w|plague}}, {{w|lung cancer}} and {{w|radiation poisoning}}.
*'''Wings''' - These {{w|wings}} resemble the ones found on {{w|sanitary towel}}s (sometimes called "pads", making this a possible iPad pun) which attach the pad to the {{w|gusset}} and keep it in place between the woman's legs during her period ({{w|Menstruation}} cycle). If actually functional as {{w|aerodynamic}} wings, they would likely come into play when the "SpaceX" impact protection feature becomes engaged, and would likely make holding the phone awkward if rigid.
**[[XKCD Phone 3]] had a similarly positioned wristband.
*'''Beveled bezel''' - The ''bezel'' is the ring around the edge of watches and screens. This one's {{w|bevel}}ed, which means it's cut at an angle.
*'''Bezeled bevel''' - Punning on the above. Doesn't make much sense, but could mean that it features a beveled edge which is surrounded by a bezel.
*'''Seedless''' - Fruit such as grapes can be "seedless", which means that they're grown from a special {{w|cultivar}} that doesn't grow seeds in the normal way. Making a phone seedless probably won't do anything, but {{w|Random seed|it might hurt}} its {{w|random number generator}}.
**[[XKCD Phone 3]] was boneless.
*'''Water resistant down to 30 meters and below 50''' - {{w|Water resistance}} is often measured in terms of how deep an object can be submerged, since pressure increases with depth. In this case, the phone can be submerged to almost any depth, but there's an odd lacuna between 30 meters and 50 meters. It also plays with the confusion in describing depths greater than 50m as "below 50". Alternatively, this might indicate the phone must remain dry above 50 meters altitude.
**[[xkcd Phone]] and [[XKCD Phone 3]] could drown. The latter was otherwise waterproof. [[xkcd Phone 2]] was only waterproof internally.
**In a previous comic, [[870: Advertising]], a similarly absurd range was used: "Up to 15% or more!"
**This could be mocking the "donut hole" in American Medicare drugs insurance, where people are insured up to a certain amount, then not insured, then insured again. This doesn't appear to make sense to anyone.
*'''Turing-complete''' - A computer is {{w|Turing completeness|Turing complete}} if it can perform all the operations needed to simulate a {{w|Turing machine}}. All modern computers are usually described as Turing complete, which would make this not very impressive, but no computer can ever be Turing complete in the truest sense (since they can only ever have a finite amount of memory) - if the xkcd Phone 4 is truly a universal computer, it's ''very'' impressive indeed.
*'''Gregorian/Julian calendar date switch''' - The {{w|Julian calendar}} is the predecessor to the modern {{w|Gregorian calendar}} - the difference is that the two calendars calculate leap years differently. The current difference between the calenders is 13 days, which will remain unchanged until February 2100. The Julian calendar is still used occasionally--mainly by Eastern Orthodox Christians--but it's not something so vital that it needs a hardwired switch on the front of the phone. This may be a play on the ability to switch the time display between a 12-hour clock and a 24-hour clock. It could also be plying with the ability to switch between Daylight Savings Time and Standard, or change time zones.
*'''''SpaceX'' impact protection: when dropped, phone lands on barge''' - The rocket company {{w|SpaceX}} recently trialed a {{w|SpaceX reusable launch system development program|reusable rocket stage}} which after separating from the launch vehicle, lands on a {{w|Autonomous spaceport drone ship|drone barge}} to be reused.
*'''The title text''' pokes fun at the number of SpaceX rockets that [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3wZRdg-Tmo crashed and exploded] before they got the landing gear right.
*'''Parallel port''' - A {{w|parallel port}} is a type of interface which transfers high-volume simultaneous data. It was often used to connect printers and other devices to computers, but was generally considered obsolete by the time smartphones began to appear on the market, and would be very bulky and slow compared to the USB ports generally used in phones. It was commonly found together with {{w|serial port}}s, which are used for low-volume sequential data such as [[485: Depth|mouse]] [[1110: Click and Drag|movements]]. Here it is paired with a serial interface for analog data with parallel outputs for several people.
*'''12 headphone jacks''' - Headphone jacks are circular ports in a phone that allow audio to be played through headphones connected to the jack. There are [http://www.businessinsider.com.au/apple-headphone-jack-iphone-side-effects-2016-7#/#smaller-headphone-makers-would-be-at-a-disadvantage-4 constant rumours] that Apple's next iPhone will not have any headphone jacks (which eventually proved true for the iPhone 7 announcement two months after this comic). Also, [http://www.google.com Google] was developing a module for the now-cancelled [https://atap.google.com/ara/ Project Ara], a modular smartphone. This module allows the device to have [http://www.overclock3d.net/news/audio/sennheiser_shows_audio_module_concepts_for_project_ara/1 Four headphone jacks], which would allow audio to be shared among 4 people, each occupying one port. The xkcd phone takes this too far when they install a whopping TWELVE of them, which is completely overkill because almost nobody needs to connect to 12 headphones at once. 12 headphones will also drain the battery, like the wireless discharging in the [[XKCD Phone 3]], because playing audio through 24 speakers, two for each pair of headphones, is very power-consuming.
*'''Onboard cloud''' - The "cloud" is a catch-all term for the use of remote computers to store data, providing a backup if all local copies are lost and allowing the data to be accessed from a broad network. An "onboard cloud" would thus be a contradiction in terms, and appears to be a marketing ploy to use the "cloud" buzzword to describe the device's onboard storage capacity.
*'''New BrightGloTM display incorporates genetically spliced jellyfish protein (should have used the glowing genes, not the stinging ones)''' - {{w|Aequorea victoria}} is a species of jellyfish that contains {{w|green fluorescent protein}}, a gene that is bioluminescent and gives off light. This protein was supposed to be used to light the phone's screen. Unfortunately, the developers messed up, and accidentally took[http://bmcgenomics.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12864-015-1568-3 stinging kind], which means that touching the phone screen will be as painful as a jellyfish sting i.e. very painful.
*'''✓ Certified''' - Twitter certifies accounts related to music producers, government, journalism, business, sports, and other more "official" types of accounts with a blue checkmark besides the twitter handle (besides the @whomever). It's of course nonsense for a phone to be twitter verified. Alternatively, it might be a reference to [[1096: Clinically Studied Ingredient]], in which buzzwords such as "tested" and "certified" are intended to make a given product sound more legitimate.
*'''Software-defined''' - {{w|Software-defined radio}}s are quite popular in some areas, meaning the radio hardware is quite universal and can be adapted to different radio protocols just by changing software. SDR would actually be quite a nice feature for a cellphone. Of course it doesn't specify if it's the radio that is software defined.
*'''Exposed ductwork''' - A phone shouldn't even have ductwork, unless it has a very sophisticated cooling system, but this could supply air to the dog whistle. Exposed ductwork is a trademark of {{w|Bowellism|Bowellist}} architecture such as the {{w|Lloyd's Building}} in London and the {{w|Pompidou Centre}} in Paris. Exposed ductwork is also considered a crucial flaw in a death star. May also refer to a transparent window in the side of the phone allowing the user to see the circuitry inside, similar to computer cases with transparent side panels popular among DIY computing enthusiasts.
*'''Voice interaction: {{w|Siri (software)|Siri}}, {{w|Cortana (software)|Cortana}}, {{w|Google Now}} and {{w|Amazon Echo|Alexa}} respond simultaneously''' - These are all {{w|intelligent personal assistant software}} (from Apple, Microsoft, Google and Amazon respectively) and all do the same thing: control your phone and answer questions using speech recognition. Having all four talk at once would mean you'd have a total cacophony while gaining nothing.
**[[XKCD Phone 3]] might have included Siri.

*'''Did you know "4" is "IV" in Roman numerals?®©™''' - the tenth version of Apple's {{w|operating system}} for its {{w|Macintosh computer}} was labeled {{w|OS X}}, which was intended to be read as "oh ess ten". {{w|Steve Jobs}} was irritated that everyone else preferred "oh ess ecks". This phrase is labeled with trademark and copyright symbols, as if someone desires it to be the product's {{w|tagline}} but has poor understanding of relevant laws. In particular, "<big>{{w|™}}</big>" is a symbol for {{w|unregistered trademark}}s while "<big>{{w|®}}</big>" is a symbol for {{w|registered trademark}}s. If the phrase were an unregistered trademark, the owner would be prohibited from using "<big>{{w|®}}</big>".

==Transcript==
:[An image of a smartphone featuring wings is shown. Clockwise from the top left the labels read:]

:18,000 μAh nickel-lithium-iron battery (non-rechargeable)

:Subwoofer

:"Dog whistle"

:Non-porous, washable

:WebMD partnership: Cough-activated feature reads aloud a random diagnosis for "coughing"

:Wings

:Beveled bezel

:Bezeled bevel

:Seedless

:Water resistant down to 30 meters and below 50

:Turing-complete

:Gregorian/Julian calendar switch

:SpaceX impact protection: When dropped, phone lands on barge

:Parallel port

:12 headphone jacks

:Onboard cloud

:New BrightGloTM display incorporates genetically spliced jellyfish protein (should have used the glowing genes, not the stinging ones)

:✓ Certified

:Software-defined

:Exposed ductwork

:Voice interaction: Siri, Cortana, Google Now and Alexa respond simultaneously

:[Below the phone:]
:Introducing
:<big><big>The XKCD Phone 4</big></big>
:Did you know "4" is "IV" in Roman numerals?®©™

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|xkcd Phones]]
[[Category:Animals]]

1787: Voice Commands

2017-01-18T16:53:33Z

172.68.46.35: links

{{comic
| number = 1787
| date = January 18, 2017
| title = Voice Commands
| image = voice_commands.png
| titletext = Dvorak words may sound hard to pronounce, but studies show they actually put less stress on the vocal chords.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BOT - Please change this comment when editing this page.}}
The {{w|Dvorak_Simplified_Keyboard|Dvorak keyboard layout}} was designed to replace the {{w|QWERTY}} keyboard layout (the de facto standard keyboard layout, so named for the starting letters in the top row). The Dvorak layout was designed in the belief that it would significantly increase typing speeds over the QWERTY layout. Using Dvorak for speech to text makes no sense whatsoever.

The sentence he tells his phone translates to "Okay Google send a text" - he says it as if it was typed on a QWERTY keyboard set to Dvorak layout.

The title text is a reference to the fact that many users of DVORAK keyboards claim they may be hard to learn, but they are more productive after you get used to them. This makes little sense in the scenario set up by the comic, because no typing is involved in giving voice commands to Google.

==Transcript==
[Ponytail] Can you text it to me?

[Cueball] Sure! SVAT USSUPD ;DLH A KDBK

[Ponytail] ...What?

[Phone beeps]

{{comic discussion}}

1787: Voice Commands

2017-01-18T16:51:41Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ clarify

{{comic
| number = 1787
| date = January 18, 2017
| title = Voice Commands
| image = voice_commands.png
| titletext = Dvorak words may sound hard to pronounce, but studies show they actually put less stress on the vocal chords.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a BOT - Please change this comment when editing this page.}}
The Dvorak layout was designed to replace the QWERTY keyboard layout (the de facto standard keyboard layout, so named for the starting letters in the top row). The Dvorak layout was designed in the belief that it would significantly increase typing speeds over the QWERTY layout. Using Dvorak for speech to text makes no sense whatsoever.

The sentence he tells his phone translates to "Okay Google send a text" - he says it as if it was typed on a QWERTY keyboard set to Dvorak layout.

The title text is a reference to the fact that many users of DVORAK keyboards claim they may be hard to learn, but they are more productive after you get used to them. This makes little sense in the scenario set up by the comic, because no typing is involved in giving voice commands to Google.

==Transcript==
[Ponytail] Can you text it to me?

[Cueball] Sure! SVAT USSUPD ;DLH A KDBK

[Ponytail] ...What?

[Phone beeps]

{{comic discussion}}

1681: Laser Products

2017-01-05T23:27:49Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1681
| date = May 16, 2016
| title = Laser Products
| image = laser_products.png
| titletext = ERRORS: HAIR JAM. COLOR-SAFE CONDITIONER CARTRIDGE RUNNING LOW. LEGAL-SIZE HAIR TRAY EMPTY, USING LETTER-SIZE HAIR ONLY.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic takes three laser-based technologies - laser eye surgery, laserjet printers, and laser hair removal - and conflates them, with humorous results. These are illustrated through reviews by users of the resulting combinations. For the original combinations, the reviews are highly positive. For the new combinations, most are negative, because most of these new "technologies" are ill-conceived and possibly harmful.

'''Laser eye surgery''' gets a positive review, since it has successfully corrected the reviewer's vision, no longer requiring them to use glasses. However, '''laser eye removal''' would be very painful, and thus the review is negative, stating that the reviewer had read the description incorrectly, likely believing it to be one of the real combinations on the chart. This is not the first time laser eye removal has been mentioned, see the lower right part in the [[1619: Watson Medical Algorithm]] chart. '''Laser eye printer''' refers to printing on (or possibly ''of'') an eyeball, which gets an "Eww" response.

'''Laser jet surgery''' makes the reviewer nervous, as performing maintenance on a jet with lasers is potentially dangerous and could easily be done incorrectly{{Citation needed}}. Alternatively, laser jet surgery could mean laser surgery done on a human from a jet aircraft with a laser mounted to it (unspecified whether the human being operated on is aboard that aircraft as well, another aircraft, or on land: in any case, not a safe idea). The ambiguity of the phrase may contribute to the person's concern. '''Laser jet removal''' implies the destruction of jets with lasers, which works, but angers the Federal Aviation Administration, and probably resulted in legal consequences for the reviewer. '''Laserjet printing''' gets a positive review, as it is legitimate printing technology that works well for the reviewer.

The '''Laser Jet Removal''' may refer to [https://www.faa.gov/about/initiatives/lasers/ the real FAA concern] of the many incidents [http://www.laserpointersafety.com/laser-hazards_aircraft/laser-hazards_aircraft.html of people using laser pointers] against aircraft.

'''Laser hair surgery''' is rated neutrally, with the reviewer pointing out that they consider the phrase to be bizarre and obfuscating -- for the user, it amounted to little more than a normal haircut -- and they note that the using a laser to cut hair results in a smell of burning hair. '''Laser hair removal''' is reviewed well, as it is a real process that effectively removes unwanted hair. '''Laser hair printer''' is negatively reviewed for being disgusting, the printer jamming, and the machine being unable to stop printing the hair.

The title text expands on the laser hair printer from the last entrance, displaying standard printer error messages, replacing "paper" with "hair". It also replaces "ink" with "color-safe conditioner".

===Laser eye surgery===
LASIK, one of the more common laser eye surgeries, works by cutting open the cornea and ablating a small amount of the lens. Lasers are used for both steps. This, or equivalent, is the referenced surgery. There are other laser eye surgeries for various other conditions besides near- and far-sightedness.

===Laserjet printing===
LaserJet is a brand name used by Hewlett Packard (HP) for its line of laser printers.

Laser printing is an electrostatic digital printing process. It produces high-quality text and graphics (and moderate-quality photographs) by repeatedly passing a laser beam back and forth over a negatively charged cylinder called a "drum" to define a differentially-charged image. The drum then selectively collects electrically charged powdered ink (toner), and transfers the image to paper, which is then heated in order to permanently fuse the text and/or imagery. As with digital photocopiers and multifunction/all-in-one inkjet printers, laser printers employ a xerographic printing process. However, laser printing differs from analog photocopiers in that the image is produced by the direct scanning of the medium across the printer's photoreceptor. This enables laser printing to copy images more quickly than most photocopiers.

===Laser hair removal===
Laser hair removal is the process of removing unwanted hair by means of exposure to pulses of laser light that destroy the hair follicle. It had been performed experimentally for about twenty years before becoming commercially available in the mid-1990s. One of the first published articles describing laser hair removal was authored by the group at Massachusetts General Hospital in 1998.The efficacy of laser hair removal is now generally accepted in the dermatology community,[citation needed] and laser hair removal is widely practiced in clinics, and even in homes using devices designed and priced for consumer self-treatment. Many reviews of laser hair removal methods, safety, and efficacy have been published in the dermatology literature.

Lastly, as an aside, [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laser_Weapon_System "Laser Jet Removal"] actually exists as a military weapon system. Although it's primarily meant to be used against jet ''missiles'' not jet planes (as the FAA quip suggests).

==Transcript==
:[Heading above the table:]
:Online Reviews of Laser Products

:[A three by three table with one word to the far left, from which three lines split out and goes to three words just left of each of the three rows. Above each column is three other words. Below in the table are nine reviews with star rating on a five star scale. The actual rating is indicated with black stars and also use half filled stars in the rating system. The ratings are written in the table in square brackets.]
:{| class="wikitable"
!colspan="2"|
! ...surgery
! ...removal
! ...printer
|-
!rowspan="3"|Laser
! eye...
| [4 1/2 stars] "I don't need glasses anymore!" || [1/2 star] "Aaaaaaa! Misread the description! Aaaaaaaaaaaa!!" || [1 star] "Eww." 
|-
! jet...
| [1 1/2 stars] "Too nervous to try it." || [2 1/2 stars] "Effective, but the FAA got ''really'' mad." || [4 stars] "Prints great!" 
|-
! hair...
| [2 1/2 stars] "Confusing term for haircut. Burning smell." || [4 stars] "Great results!" || [1/2 star] "Disgusting, won't turn off, jams constantly." 
|-
|}

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Charts]]

Talk:1143: Location

2017-01-05T22:37:27Z

172.68.46.35:

I thought the words "like" and "hang out" were references to facebook's "like" and google's "hang out". What do the native speakers think? {{unsigned|213.252.171.254|07:56, 5 December 2012 (UTC)}}

: Not in this case- here they're just being used as the everyday terms that facebook and google co-opted. {{unsigned|140.247.0.10|08:12, 5 December 2012 (UTC)}}

:: I agree. {{unsigned|122.60.40.91|09:28, 5 December 2012 (UTC)}}

: Native speaker here: there doesn't seem to be anything distinctive about the use of 'like' and 'hang out' in this comic to indicate they might be references. {{unsigned|170.194.32.42|10:33, 5 December 2012 (UTC)}}

:: The words aren't out of place otherwise, so it just might be a (big) coincidence. I still find it likely to be true. [[Special:Contributions/207.237.164.241|207.237.164.241]] 11:18, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

::: It's really not a "big" coincidence at all. 'Like' and 'hang out' are ''the'' most obvious word choices in their context in the comic. The same words are used in social network apps ''because'' they are common social phrases. It doesn't even warrant the word "coincidence", let alone a "big" coincidence. [[Special:Contributions/46.65.14.73|46.65.14.73]] 22:55, 16 December 2012 (UTC)

: Another native speaker here. You typically would not "hang out" – in real life – with people you don't "like" – as in you like your friends. There's nothing in the comic to make me think there's any connection with Facebook or Google+. [[Special:Contributions/24.41.5.167|24.41.5.167]] 11:44, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

: This native speaker agrees. The dialog is ordinary informal American English. That's why facebook and Google hijacked the words. Facebook and Google want to be seen as informal and idiomatic institutions. {{unsigned|174.125.142.147|15:25, 5 December 2012 (UTC)}}

::They'll be very disappointed when they discover that he just decorated the bushes around his house with green LED lights for Christmas. --Geoff [[Special:Contributions/128.156.10.80|128.156.10.80]] 19:22, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

No explanation for the space noises? [[User:Max Nanasy|Max Nanasy]] ([[User talk:Max Nanasy|talk]]) 21:28, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

: The game literally makes space noises. Like... ''whooosshhshhhssshhoooooshhh.'' Things like that. [[Special:Contributions/138.110.225.187|138.110.225.187]] 22:30, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

::Thank you for that. I had no idea what was being referenced, serves me right for not reading the title text. (This is not sarcasm, it sounded like it was when I read it to myself, so I'm adding this disclaimer) [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 22:33, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

:: But "space noises" is an oxymoron. In space, you can't hear noise. (Oh... you mean bad-sci-fi-movie noises...) [[Special:Contributions/207.225.239.130|207.225.239.130]] 19:16, 6 December 2012 (UTC)

::Another Google closed beta – you get to play by invite only. Meh [[Special:Contributions/24.41.5.167|24.41.5.167]] 23:53, 5 December 2012 (UTC)

I'm trying to find a game that I played on the computer about 2 years ago. I remember that you could see the entire play area the entire time. It was timed. The object was to get to a hole (maybe blue in color) to end the level. There were blocks that often blocked your path, which you needed to push out of your way or more often use them to make bridges to cross water. Some of the levels were very much a timing game where you needed to quickly move a block through a winding path(up, down, left, right only)to avoid being caught by, I believe, moving blocks.The closest screen shot that I've found is Chips Challenge, which is not the game that I played previously. I remember there were many levels, probably between 50 and 100. Ideas?[[User:Shine|Shine]] ([[User talk:Shine|talk]]) 15:33, 6 December 2012 (UTC) RESOLVED : game was called Silversphere[[User:Shine|Shine]] ([[User talk:Shine|talk]]) 21:24, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

: RE: Shine. The game was called Rodent's Revenge. Phenomenal Times, Shine, Phenomenal Times. Glad you reminded me about it!
:::Not the game I was thinking of, but fun game too. No animals of any kind in the game that I'm trying to find [[User:Shine|Shine]] ([[User talk:Shine|talk]]) 17:13, 7 December 2012 (UTC)
:OK got it. It was called Silversphere. [[User:Shine|Shine]] ([[User talk:Shine|talk]]) 21:24, 7 December 2012 (UTC)

I was absolutely certain that the bright green "fountains" were supposed to illustrate some radioactive material and them being "excited" was somehow a particle physics joke I couldnt nail down.

:My assumption was that his house was just in a good location to watch some space phenomenon. The Aurora, or a meteor shower.[[Special:Contributions/141.101.104.156|141.101.104.156]] 12:27, 17 December 2014 (UTC)

You should really try Ingress now. It's great. However, I don't understand what he lives beside that's so portal-worthy. --[[Special:Contributions/108.162.218.185|108.162.218.185]] 00:54, 20 June 2015 (UTC)

By my house, across the Mississippi from St,l there is a Catholic Church with a portal on two idols and a bell tower. Unfortunately it is just out of reach from my bedroom. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.50.61|173.245.50.61]] 20:00, 24 December 2015 (UTC)
:Please do some research before the next time you associate the Catholic Church with idolatry. If you would like, I may be able to refer you to some sources at some later time.
:—[[User:CsBlastoise|CsBlastoise]], a Catholic ([[User talk:CsBlastoise|talk]]) 15:29, 5 December 2016 (UTC)
::It's not nice to assume malice. In this context he's probably using the definition of "idol" that simply means "statue" ("an image or representation of a god used as an object of worship" via Google) [[Special:Contributions/172.68.46.35|172.68.46.35]] 22:37, 5 January 2017 (UTC)

1143: Location

2017-01-05T22:35:05Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1143
| date = December 5, 2012
| title = Location
| image = location.png
| titletext = Ingress: Foursquare With Space Noises.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Ingress (game)|Ingress}} is an {{w|augmented reality}} location-based service game in which players have to visit certain real-world places marked by the game as containing in-game objectives called portals. The single guy in the comic owns a home surrounded by an abundance of portals, which makes it an attractive destination for the three friends who contact him via the computer. They are obviously not really friends of the guy, but just wish to come by because of the portals.

The portals in the comic are controlled by the green "Enlightened" team (and have links and a field), making them valuable resource caches for fellow Enlightened, and priority targets for the blue "Resistance" team.

{{w|Foursquare}}, referenced in the title text, is another service that lets users check into places they visit for discounts in a similar way to how Ingress players visit portals for points. Unlike Foursquare places, which are businesses and public places such as parks, Ingress portals also include historic houses that are still private residences, as well as churches, so Ingress is more likely to reward people visiting a friend's house. "Space noises" refers to the ambient sounds when playing Ingress.

==Transcript==
:[Three people around a computer. One of them is typing.]
:Typing: Hey, party tonight?
:Typing: We'd all like to come see your new place!
:Reply (through monitor): Wait, what?

:[Cut to guy sitting at a laptop.]
:Reply (through the guy's monitor): We want to hang out!
:Guy typing: We're not, like, good friends.
:Reply (through the guy's monitor): I know, but we were thinking about it and we really like you!

:[Cut back to the three friends.]
:Typing: You should have us over tonight!
:Typing: For, like, an hour.
:Typing: It'll be fun!
:Reply (through monitor): Well, uh, sure.

:[Cut to color-inverted image of the guy's house. Four Enlightened-controlled Ingress portals are in the guy's back yard.]
:Friends (off-screen): ''YESSSS!''
:Guy (from inside his house): I still don't get why you're suddenly so excited to hang out.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Video games]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Social networking]]
[[Category:Computers]]

985: Percentage Points

2017-01-05T22:33:36Z

172.68.46.35:

{{comic
| number = 985
| date = December 2, 2011
| title = Percentage Points
| image = percentage_points.png
| titletext = Grayton also proposed making college scholarships available exclusively to sexually active teens, amnesty for illegal immigrants who create room for themselves by killing a citizen, and a graduated income tax based on penis size. He has been endorsed by Tracy Morgan, John Wilkes Booth's ghost, and the Time Cube guy.
}}

==Explanation==
Senator Grayton is a fictional character, made up for this comic, which is unusual for xkcd, which typically uses real-world references.

The issues that Grayton supports:

*Tax Breaks to Drunk Drivers: Grayton proposes giving those who have been convicted of a {{w|DUI}} or DWI (i.e. Driving Under the Influence or Driving While Intoxicated) money back on their taxes, when those infractions are typically severely penalized, as drunk driving has resulted in numerous deaths.
*{{w|Predator Drones}} and the {{w|Christmas controversy|War on Christmas}}: The War on {{w|Christmas}} is not a real war; it is simply the perception by some {{w|Christian}}s that non-Christians are trying to replace traditional Christmas imagery with more inclusive and generic holiday customs. No politicians have explicitly announced their support of the "War on Christmas," and the idea that one would not only do so, but would also want to use drones —ostensibly to harm or possibly kill people— in the effort is an absurd exaggeration of a relatively harmless culture war.

The term {{w|percentage point}} is used to overcome an abiguity when comparing two percentages. Assuming an original sample of 1,000,000 people, where 20% approve of Senator Grayton.

'''Reduction of a stated number by a percentage'''
:When the original value is given as a number, there is no ambiguity. In the statement below the only possible conclusion is that now only 162,000 people approve of Grayton.
:''Previously 200,000 people approved of Senator Grayton, and then his approval rating dropped by 19%.''

'''Reduction of a percentage by a percentage'''
:When the original approval rating is given as a percentage (20% in the comic), then a reduction of 19% has two possible meanings:
:1) Of the 20% who previously approved (200,000 people), 19% no longer approve. In this case the result is 162,000 as in the above example.
:2) Compared to the original results, 19% fewer of the entire original sample of 1 million people approve. In this case only 1% of the original 1 million approve, equal to 10,000 people.

If using the second method of comparing percentages, the approvals rating should be described as having dropped by 19 percentage points. In reality, the distinction between the two methods is often overlooked, leading to confusion.

The caption's issue with "percentage" versus "percentage points" is that if Grayton's 20% approval rating drops by 19%, that means that his support has only dropped 3.8 percentage points since 19% of 20% is only 3.8%. That would mean that even after all his outrageous statements, his support dropped only from 20% to 16.2%. However, if the news reports that his 20% approval rating dropped 19 ''percentage points'', that means his support has dropped to 1%, which appears to be more accurate given Grayton's egregious policy decisions and the description of his campaign as having "imploded."

The punchline to all this is that Randall is more bothered by the "percent" ambiguity than by Grayton's appalling policy plans.

References in the title text:

*{{w|Tracy Morgan}} is an actor who plays Tracy Jordan in the TV Show {{w|30 Rock}}. He has been reprimanded for controversial comments on homosexuals and {{w|Sarah Palin}} (in separate incidents).
*{{w|John Wilkes Booth}} is the person who assassinated {{w|Abraham Lincoln}}. He was a {{w|Confederate}} sympathizer and supported slavery.
*"The {{w|Time Cube}} Guy" would be Gene Ray, also known as Otis E. Ray. To put things ''very'' politely (as Mr. Ray is a very angry man with severe schizophrenia), he has a website known as Time Cube where he sets out his personal model of reality, which he calls Time Cube. He suggests that all of modern physics is wrong, in addition to claiming that religion is evil, specifically Christianity, and that the idea of family is poisoning children.
*College Scholarships to Sexually Active Teens: Many people think adolescents should not engage in sexual activity, let alone encouraged to do so by college scholarships. This is the opposite of {{w|Abstinence-only sex education|abstinence programs}}, which encourage teens not to be sexually active until marriage.
*Illegal immigrants who create room for themselves by killing a citizen: {{w|Illegal immigration to the United States|Illegal immigration}} is a highly controversial topic in the United States. One argument against illegal immigration is that illegal immigrants are taking jobs away from American citizens. Proponents of immigration assert that this is not the case, since more people in the overall economy creates jobs and brings in more tax revenue. Neither group would be in favor of illegal immigrants murdering citizens even though it would not result in a net gain or loss in population.
*Graduated income tax based on penis size: Many men are sensitive about their penis size and would probably consider the measurement of their penises for tax assessment purposes an enormous embarrassment and invasion of privacy. Even the scenario in which those with relatively smaller penises would be levied less tax than those with larger penises would probably not be sufficient for them to accept this policy, and even if they did, those with larger penises would probably consider this policy to be unfair. And the alternative - a scenario in which ''larger'' penises pay less taxes - would be both unfair and incredibly demeaning.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is sitting in an armchair watching TV while listening to a news report coming from the TV as shown by a zigzag line.]
:Voice from TV: Senator Grayton's campaign has imploded following the candidate's promise to give tax breaks to drunk drivers and to authorize the use of unmanned Predator drones in the War On Christmas. Grayton had been polling at 20%, but his support has since plunged by 19%.

:[Caption below the panel:]
:I hate the ambiguity created when people don't distinguish between percentages and percentage points.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]] 
[[Category:Politics]]
[[Category:Math]]
[[Category:Penis]]

1775: Things You Learn

2016-12-21T20:09:27Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ add links

{{comic
| number = 1775
| date = December 21, 2016
| title = Things You Learn
| image = things_you_learn.png
| titletext = Guess who has two thumbs and spent the night in an ER after trying to rescue a kitten that ran under his car at a stoplight and climbed up into the engine compartment? And, thanks to antibiotics, will continue having two thumbs? THIS GUY. (P.S. kitten is safe!)
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Title text, fill table.}}
This graph shows various items of information plotted by two criteria: a horizontal "How Bad Is It If You Don't Know [THING]" axis and a vertical "How Easy It Is To Grow Up Without Learning [THING]" axis.

The title text describes an encounter Randall had the night before writing this comic where a cat climbed into the engine compartment or his car. It probably serves as an explanation for the seemingly out of place point on the graph about how serious cat bites are. Also, the start of the title text "Guess who has two thumbs and..." is a reference to {{w|Dr. Bob Kelso}} from {{w|Scrubs (TV series)|Scrubs}}, which might refer to the other end of the spectrum from cat bites: TV theme songs.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! Ignorance is Bad !! Ignorance is Easy !! Information !! Comments
|-
| not bad || (very, very) easy || 100 digits of {{w|pi}} || Most people don't know more than a few digits of pi, and don't need to.
|-
| not bad || (very) easy || Lyrics to "{{w|We Didn't Start the Fire}}" || "We Didn't Start the Fire" is a 1987 hit song by Billy Joel. Its lyrics include brief, rapid-fire allusions to more than 100 headline events between 1949, the year of Joel's birth, and 1989. While the chorus is memorable, the verses of the song are just a list of people, events and random things from popular culture. The average person is somewhat more likely to know the lyrics to Billy Joel's 1987 hit song than 100 digits of pi, but not knowing them doesn't really have any serious consequences.
|-
| (very) bad || (very) easy || That cat bites are really serious and if bitten you need to wash the bite and call a doctor immediately || Most people assume that a cat bite is just a minor injury. In fact, it carries a fairly high risk of infection, which can be dangerous if not treated (by cleaning the bite to reduce the risk, and having a doctor examine the bite victim and apply additional treatments such as antibiotics if needed).
|-
| (very) bad || (very) easy || The red flags for an abusive relationship || It is fairly easy for someone to fall into a pattern of accepting abuse (particularly if the abuser is skilled at emotional manipulation) without realizing it, and the consequences can be mentally and physically devastating.
|-
| (very, very) bad || easy || The {{w|Stroke#Signs_and_symptoms|signs of a stroke}} || The symptoms of a {{w|stroke}} are somewhat variable, including facial drooping, arm weakness and slurred speech, depending on what areas of the brain are affected, and can be mistaken for other conditions. Identifying a stroke quickly and seeking treatment can make the difference between life and death, or between full recovery and permanent impairment.
|-
| bad || easy || Cough into your elbow, not your hand || Covering a cough with the inside of your elbow helps prevent spreading airborne germs and is generally recommended by medical organisations. Coughing into your hand deposits them onto your hand, where they are much more likely to be spread to another person (via handshake, food preparation, shared objects, etc)
|-
| not (too) bad || hard || How to ride a bike || Most children, especially in the United States, learn to ride a bike at a fairly young age. While this is a useful skill to know for both entertainment and transportation, it would generally not be terrible to not learn this skill.
|-
| not bad (at all) || hard || How to escape movie {{w|quicksand}} || Quicksand in movies is a common trope, and while its physics often differ from real quicksand, escaping from it is commonly done using similar methods (eg, not struggling, which increases the quicksand's viscosity). Knowing how to escape from quicksand is important if you sink into it, which is a situation most people are very unlikely to encounter.
|-
| not bad (at all) || (very) hard || Lyrics to "{{w|The Twelve Days of Christmas (song)|12 Days of Christmas}}" || Hearing the same Christmas songs over and over each year makes it hard not to learn the lyrics over time. However, the consequences of not doing so are minimal; at most, ignorance of popular culture may leave your friends [[1769|a bit surprised and dismayed]].
|-
| not bad (at all) || (very, very) hard || {{w|Theme music|TV theme songs}} || Most children in developed countries grow up watching at least some television. Many of these television shows play the same theme song before the show starts, and many of these have catchy lyrics. Therefore, by repetition, most children will learn at least one of these growing up, and often many.
|-
| bad || hard || That you have to empty the dryer lint trap || Most clothes dryers collect lint in a mesh "trap". Failing to remove the lint can cause the dryer to stop working effectively, introduce lint back onto your clothes, or (in extreme cases) start a fire.
|-
| (very) bad || (very) hard || {{w|Stop, drop and roll}} || This is a technique to extinguish a fire on one's own clothing, and is frequently taught to children for safety. Not knowing it (or forgetting it in a panic when the situation arises) can result in severe burns that could have been avoided by following the recommendation.
|-
| (very) bad || (very) hard || That you have to pay taxes || Most residents of most countries are legally obligated to pay taxes to their government. Penalties for not doing so often include large fines, and possibly prison sentences. Fortunately, it is something that children hear about quite a bit so it is very difficult to grow up without learning that it must be done.
|-
|}

==Rankings==

100% not bad: not bad at all . . . 100%>not-badness≥50%: not bad . . . 50%>not-badness≥0%: not too bad

100% very bad: very, very bad . . . 100%>very badness≥50%: very bad . . . 50%>very badness>0%: bad

100% hard: very, very hard . . . 100%>hardness≥50%: very hard . . . 50%>hardness>0%: hard

100% easy: very, very easy . . . 100%>easiness≥50%: very easy . . . 50%>easiness≥0%: easy

==Transcript==
[A simple x and y graph, with the X labeled "how bad it is if you don't know {thing}", and you labeled "how easy it is to grow up without learning {thing}]

Points on graph from top to bottom on the left side of the x axis:

> 100 digits of pi
> Lyrics to ''We Didn't Start the Fire''
> How to ride a bike
> How to escape movie quicksand
> Lyrics to ''12 Days of Christmas''
> TV theme songs

Points on graph from top to bottom on the right side of the y axis:

> That cat bites are really serious and if bitten you should wash the bite and call a doctor immediately
> Red flags for an abusive relationship
> Signs for a stroke
> Cough into your elbow, not your hand
> That you have to empty the dryer lint trap
> Stop, drop, and roll
> That you have to pay taxes

{{comic discussion}}

1774: Adjective Foods

2016-12-21T19:53:28Z

172.68.46.35: fix link

{{comic
| number = 1774
| date = December 19, 2016
| title = Adjective Foods
| image = adjective_foods.png
| titletext = Contains 100% of your recommended daily allowance!
}}

==Explanation==

This comic shows one of [[Randall]]’s goals in life – creating foods with "adjective-only" names, where common phrases such as "glazed donuts" or "lite beer" would be replaced with "glazed" or "lite". This is a jab at food market buzzwords, which usually rely on adjectives and words that bring up certain feelings based on how the food is "supposed to be". An example of this is something like "lean and tender beef". It is also semi-difficult to determine the actual contents just by adjectives, or if there are any contents besides adjectives.

Even though the comic says "adjective-only", "original flavor" is a noun phrase.

The title text furthers this by taking the phrase "{{w|Reference_Daily_Intake|recommended daily allowance}} of XXX", and removing the "of XXX" part. This may have been an attempt at furthering the joke by making it vague enough to be meaningless or it could be a jab at the cost of high adjective count food.

This joke is very similar to [[1060|comic 1060, Crowdsourcing]], in that Randall is doing nothing, and trying to make it look like he is doing something. It expresses the opposite idea from [[993|comic 993, Brand Identity]].

==Transcript==

:[An arrangement of labeled foodstuffs, from left to right and top to bottom:]
:Premium Stone-ground Bespoke, Cage-free
:Gourmet Fire-roasted Glazed flambé
:Organic All-natural Locally-sourced Artisanal, Kosher, Grade A
:Craft Barrel-aged Smoked Authentic Homemade Sun-dried Whole Extra Sharp
:Low-calorie Lite Original Flavor
:[Caption:] I'm trying to trick supermarkets into carrying my new line of adjective-only foods.

==Trivia==

* The word “artisanal” was originally misspelled as “artisenal”.
** The wrong spelling is found [https://web.archive.org/web/20161219163201/http://xkcd.com/1774/ here].

{{comic discussion}}

1774: Adjective Foods

2016-12-20T17:27:57Z

172.68.46.35: /* Explanation */ link to wiki

{{comic
| number = 1774
| date = December 19, 2016
| title = Adjective Foods
| image = adjective_foods.png
| titletext = Contains 100% of your recommended daily allowance!
}}

==Explanation==

This comic shows one of [[Randall]]’s goals in life – creating foods with ‘adjective-only’ names, where common phrases such as “Glazed Donuts” or “Lite Beer” would be replaced with “Glazed” or “Lite”. This is a jab at food market buzzwords, which usually rely on adjectives and words that bring up certain feelings based on how the food is ‘supposed to be’. An example of this is something like ‘lean and tender beef’. It is also semi-difficult to determine the actual contents just by adjectives.

Even though the comic says “adjective-only”, “Original Flavor” is a noun phrase.

The title text furthers this by taking the phrase "[[wikt:Reference_Daily_Intake|recommended daily allowance]] of XXX", and removing the ‘of XXX’ part. This may have been an attempt at furthering the joke by making it vague enough to be meaningless or it could be a jab at the cost of high adjective count food.

This joke is very similar to [[1060|comic 1060, Crowdsourcing]], in that Randall is doing nothing, and trying to make it look like he is doing something. It expresses the opposite idea from [[993|comic 993, Brand Identity]].

===Foods that are probably in each container===
Some foods are unknown, and they all could use details such as what adjectives are typically associated with that food and what they mean.
{| class="wikitable"
!Container
!Type of food
|-
|“… bespoke cage-free” bag
|Cereal or wheat
|-
|“… glazed flambé” box
|Some type of meat or vegetable
|-
|“… Kosher Grade A” box
|Eggs, syrup, foie, wagyu beef, etc.
|-
|“… extra sharp” box
|Cheese
|-
|“… Lite original flavor” can
|Beer or soft drink
|}

==Transcript==

:[An arrangement of labeled foodstuffs, from left to right and top to bottom:]
:Premium Stone-ground Bespoke, Cage-free
:Gourmet Fire-roasted Glazed flambé
:Organic All-natural Locally-sourced Artisanal, Kosher, Grade A
:Craft Barrel-aged Smoked Authentic Homemade Sun-dried Whole Extra Sharp
:Low-calorie Lite Original Flavor
:[Caption:] I'm trying to trick supermarkets into carrying my new line of adjective-only foods.

==Trivia==

* The word “artisanal” was originally misspelled as “artisenal”.
** The wrong spelling is found [https://web.archive.org/web/20161219163201/http://xkcd.com/1774/ here].

{{comic discussion}}