explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

what if?

2018-06-05T15:04:29Z

172.68.58.23: /* Articles */

<noinclude>:''Not to be confused with [[17: What If]].''</noinclude>
[[File:whatifbanner.jpg]]

'''''[http://what-if.xkcd.com/ what if?]''''' is a blog hosted on the [[xkcd]].com domain and written by [[Randall Munroe]] with entries posted [http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/once-in-a-blue-moon.html occasionally]. Before publishing the what if? book, articles were posted weekly.

On the blog, Randall uses his degree in physics and strong scientific background to discuss hypothetical physics questions apparently submitted by readers.
Since 2014, there's also a book of the blog.

Unlike other sites which answer readers' questions, ''what if?'' typically takes the question beyond the original scope likely intended by the reader and takes it to some extreme for humorous effect. For example, in {{what if|1|the first article}}, he discusses what would happen if a baseball were pitched at 90% of the speed of light. After effectively describing what would occur as a nuclear explosion, leveling the stadium and the surrounding mile radius, he concludes with the note ''"A careful reading of official Major League Baseball Rule 6.08(b) suggests that in this situation, the batter would be considered 'hit by pitch', and would be eligible to advance to first base."''

The questions Randall tackles range from realistic possibilities (e.g. the probability of achieving a {{what if|2|perfect SAT score by guessing}}) to completely fictional questions (e.g. {{what if|3|How much Force power}} can {{w|Yoda}} output?). In his explanations, Randall, often uses diagrams in an ''xkcd'' style. Regardless of the context, Randall tends to take the questions extremely literally and responds seriously to them, even if they are whimsical (such as the Yoda question). This is clear from his response to the question of what would happen if everybody on Earth stood together and {{what if|8|jumped at the same time}}. After acknowledging that the question has been answered elsewhere, he recaps the result, but then focuses more intently on the unasked resulting issue of the aftermath of everyone on Earth being magically transported to one location as they all try to return home.

This site is not under [http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.5/ Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 2.5 License] like [[xkcd]] is.

==The book==
Randall announced his ''what if?'' book on 12 March 2014 in [http://blog.xkcd.com/2014/03/12/what-if-i-wrote-a-book/ the blag]. It was published on September 2, 2014, and the UK edition of the book was published on September 4, 2014. It is the 2nd book published by Randall.
[[Image:What_If?.jpeg|frame| The general cover of the book]]
[[Image:whatifcover.jpg|frame| The alternate cover of the book]]
It is just like 'xkcd:volume 0' a compilation of some questions from the website, but half of them are new.

In the UK edition of the book, Randall included a preface about his thoughts on the units used in the UK. (The Metric System)

====Summary====
'''The summary on the back of the book reads:'''

''Randall Munroe left NASA in 2005 to start up his hugely popular site XKCD 'a web comic of romance, sarcasm, math and language' which offers a witty take on the world of science and geeks. It now has 600,000 to a million page hits daily. Every now and then, Munroe would get emails asking him to arbitrate a science debate. 'My friend and I were arguing about what would happen if a bullet got struck by lightning, and we agreed that you should resolve it . . . ' He liked these questions so much that he started up What If.

*If your cells suddenly lost the power to divide, how long would you survive?
*How dangerous is it, really, to be in a swimming pool in a thunderstorm?
*If we hooked turbines to people exercising in gyms, how much power could we produce?
*What if everyone only had one soulmate?
*When (if ever) did the sun go down on the British empire?
*How fast can you hit a speed bump while driving and live?
*What would happen if the moon went away?

''In pursuit of answers, Munroe runs computer simulations, pores over stacks of declassified military research memos, solves differential equations, and consults with nuclear reactor operators. His responses are masterpieces of clarity and hilarity, studded with memorable cartoons and infographics. They often predict the complete annihilation of humankind, or at least a really big explosion. Far more than a book for geeks, WHAT IF: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions explains the laws of science in operation in a way that every intelligent reader will enjoy and feel much the smarter for having read.''

'''The summary on the back of the UK edition of the book reads:'''

''Hey! Thanks for looking at my book. If you're thinking about buying it, here are some things you might want to know:''

Humans can't digest the cellulose in paper, but if we could, eating this book would give you about 2,300 calories (including the cover).

This book can't stop most bullets; if you want to use it for armour, you may want a lot more than one copy.

If you have a good arm, you could probably throw this book about 45 feet. With practice, it's possible to throw a book every 800 milliseconds, which means that if human attackers are sprinting towards you, you'll have three or four chances to hit them before they reach you. If, on the other hand, you're being attacked by a coyote, it's higher top speed means you'll have only one chance to hit it. Aim carefully.

''HIDDEN FEATURE: The inside of this book has words and pictures, plus a special UK foreword.'' It answers many important questions, including whether you could jump from a plane with a helium tank and inflate balloons fast enough to slow your fall and survive (yes) and whether you could hide from a supersonic windstorm in Finland (yes, but it won't help).

==Trivia==
*There is an easy way to link to a given what if? story by using [[Template:what if|a template]]. For instance, write the following:
**<nowiki>See the [[what if?]] ''{{what if|147|Niagara Straw}}''.</nowiki>
*Copy paste the above text and correct the number and the title to get this result:
**See the [[what if?]] ''{{what if|147|Niagara Straw}}''.
*There used to be an article called ''Peptides'' but it disappeared, leaving ''Hide the Atmosphere'' in its place.

===Release schedule===
*The two first articles were released on the same day, Tuesday July 10, 2012, probably to get the blog going, and let users of xkcd see that there was going to be more.
**After that they were released weekly for almost three years, with just a few times with two (and once three) weeks between releases, up until article 136 was released on April 12, 2015 (2 years and 40 weeks).
**First after 25 releases was there a two week Christmas break before article 26 was released on December 31, 2012.
**After that there were five more two weeks break, one three week break (before December 11, 2014) and two releases in a row (133-134 towards the end of this period of 136 articles), where the release dates where shifted so the two came out over three weeks' time with about 1.5 weeks between them.
**The second break came a year after the first and was also a Christmas break before article 77 was released on December 31, 2013
**Then from August 2014 there came several two week breaks, one in August, one in September and two in November, the last lasting three weeks into December, and on top of that the normal two weeks Christmas break.
**After this less orderly period there came a period of 10 weeks in a row with 10 releases starting on January 1, 2015.
*The release day was fixed to once a week on a given weekday, except for a few articles that were delayed a day (or two) in one week, but then next week's article would again be released on the normal day.
**To begin with the release day was '''Tuesdays''', and the third article was released a week after the first two on Tuesday July 17, 2012.
**The release day shifted to '''Wednesday''' from article 100 released on Wednesday June 11, 2014.
**The release day shifted once more to '''Thursday''' from article 117 released on Thursday October 23, 2014.
**The final six articles in this period were released on four different week days, only two of them with one week apart.
*The result of the above is that over the first 144 weeks 136 articles where released with never more than 3 weeks between releases. As the first two were released on week 1, this means that there were 134 articles released over the next 143 weeks, meaning there were only 9 weeks without an article.
*After article 136 was released on April 12, 2015, Randal took a '''13 week break''' from updates until July 14, 2015.
**At the time Randall wrote a note stating "What If updates are temporarily on hold, and will resume on July 14th, 2015 at 7:49:59 AM EDT."
**This was the date and time that the {{w|New Horizons}} probe achieved its closest approach to {{w|Pluto}}.
**The article 137 from July 14, 2015 was about the New Horizons probe.
*After the break only three articles were released, two more were released after article 137 over three weeks, the last article 139 released on August 4, 2015.
**But then there were '''two more breaks''', so only one more article was released in 2015, with article 150 released after more than 6 weeks on September 18, 2015.
*First after 17 more weeks releases began again with article 141 on Tuesday January 16, 2016.
**After that articles began coming out regularly with a total of 9 releases out before the end of March 2016, mainly on Tuesdays to begin with, then one on a Friday before the last two came on Saturdays with two weeks breaks before each, the last being article 149 on March 26, 2016.
*Since then only three more articles were released in 2016, the first two with about 8 weeks between them and then more than 12 weeks.
**So during the summer of 2016, it seemed it was down to about one release every two months but then it increased.
*The what if? has not stopped but the first comic in 2017 (#153, January 30, 2017) came almost 15 weeks after the last in 2016, more than three months between releases. This was so far the second longest break.
**But the next one (#154) was indeed released only a bit more than week after the one with 15 weeks break, and then less than 3 weeks after followed yet an article on February 28 2017.
**It was almost a year ago that two comics had been released with less than two full weeks between them (that was #147 released February 26, 2016). In the year following that release only 8 articles where released including both #147 and #154.
**Interesting to see if they will begin appearing regularly again during the spring of 2017, as seems possible with three articles in less than a month and #156 was again released with less than two weeks between it and #155.
*It then seemed to stop completely after those two, and it took more than a year (62 weeks) before #157 came out in May 2018.
*See more details for breaks in the releases in the table with a list of all the [[#Articles|articles]] down below.
**At the moment it seems impossible to guess when a new post is released so:
**'''It would be nice if anyone noticing a new post, that they made a note in the discussion of the next comic released.'''

==Articles==
*Below is a list of the articles released in the what if? blog.
**This list can also be found in the [https://what-if.xkcd.com/archive/ archive section] on the what if? blog.
**But here more data can be added...
{| class="wikitable " |
! No.
! Title
! Release date
! Weeks since last release
! Question(s) answered / Topic
! Comment/Short note on subject
|-
| 1 || {{what if|1|Relativistic Baseball}} || July 10, 2012 || || What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% the speed of light? || The very first what if? The result would be some kind of nuclear explosion.
|-
| 2 || {{what if|2|SAT Guessing}} || July 10, 2012 || 0.0 || What if everyone who took the SAT guessed on every multiple-choice question? How many perfect scores would there be? || This second article was released on the same day as the first, probably to get the blog going, and let users of xkcd see that there was going to be more. No one would get a perfect score
|-
| 3 || {{what if|3|Yoda}} || July 17, 2012 || 1.0 || How much Force power can Yoda output? || First regular release. From here on standard release day was Tuesday.
|-
| 4 || {{what if|4|A Mole of Moles}} || July 24, 2012 || 1.0 || What would happen if you were to gather a mole (unit of measurement) of moles (the small furry critter) in one place? || As a mole is such a high number this would be tricky.
|-
| 5 || {{what if|5|Robot Apocalypse}} || July 31, 2012 || 1.0 || What if there was a robot apocalypse? How long would humanity last? || Humanity would survive if the robots cared about keeping themselves alive as well. If not, then we all die.
|-
| 6 || {{what if|6|Glass Half Empty}} || August 7, 2012 || 1.0 || What if a glass of water was, all of a sudden, literally half empty? || As in a vacuum? It would explode.
|-
| 7 || {{what if|7|Everybody Out}} || August 14, 2012 || 1.0 || Is there enough energy to move the entire current human population off-planet? || No, at least not without starving to death quickly and leaving our pets, belongings and everything else behind.
|-
| 8 || {{what if|8|Everybody Jump}} || August 21, 2012 || 1.0 || What would happen if everyone on earth stood as close to each other as they could and jumped, everyone landing on the ground at the same instant? || Earth would be unaffected but the human race would be wiped out due to everyone trying to get home at the same time.
|-
| 9 || {{what if|9|Soul Mates}} || August 28, 2012 || 1.0 || What if everyone actually had only one soul mate, a random person somewhere in the world? || Almost nobody would find their soul mate.
|-
| 10 || {{what if|10|Cassini}} || September 4, 2012 || 1.0 || What would the world be like if the land masses were spread out the same way as now - only rotated by an angle of 90 degrees? || Mass biosphere collapse.
|-
| 11 || {{what if|11|Droppings}} || September 11, 2012 || 1.0 || If you went outside and lay down on your back with your mouth open, how long would you have to wait until a bird pooped in it? || 195 years. Assuming you are in a area with a reasonable amount of birds. But why would you ''want'' to catch bird poop in your mouth?
|-
| 12 || {{what if|12|Raindrop}} || September 18, 2012 || 1.0 || What if a rainstorm dropped all of its water in a single giant drop? || The surrounding area would be obliterated and there would be mass panic for many following years.
|-
| 13 || {{what if|13|Laser Pointer}} || September 25, 2012 || 1.0 || If every person on Earth aimed a laser pointer at the Moon at the same time, would it change color? || Not with regular lasers, but with more power, you could destroy the world.
|-
| 14 || {{what if|14|Short Answer Section}} || October 2, 2012 || 1.0 ||
* How long would the Sun last if a giant water hose were focused upon it? My sixth grade brother, Adam, asked me this.
* What if you shined a flashlight (or a laser) into a sphere made of one-way mirror glass?
* If Michael Phelps could hold his breath indefinitely, how long would it take for him to reach the lowest point in the ocean and back if he swam straight down and then straight back up?
* In the first Superman movie, Superman flies around Earth so fast that it begins turning in the opposite direction. This somehow turns back time [... ] How much energy would someone flying around the Earth have to exert in order to reverse the Earth's rotation?
* How fast would you have to go in your car to run a red light claiming that it appeared green to you due to the Doppler Effect?
* What would happen if you opened a portal between Boston (sea level) and Mexico City (elev. 8000+ feet)?
* When my wife and I started dating she invited me over for dinner at one time. Her kitchen had something called Bauhaus chairs, which are full of holes, approx 5-6 millimeters in diameter in both back and seat. During this lovely dinner I was forced to liberate a small portion of wind and was relieved that I managed to do so very discretely. Only to find that the chair I sat on converted the successful silence into a perfect, and loud, flute note. We were both (luckily) amazed and surprised and I have often wondered what the odds are for something like that happening. We kept the chairs for five years but despite laborious attempts it couldn't be reproduced.
||
|-
| 15 || {{what if|15|Mariana Trench Explosion}} || October 9, 2012 || 1.0 || What if you exploded a nuclear bomb (say, the Tsar Bomba) at the bottom of the Marianas Trench? || It would warm a small patch of the ocean and not do much. With a bigger bomb, it could destroy the world. Again.
|-
| 16 || {{what if|16|Today's topic: Lightning}} || October 16, 2012 || 1.0 ||
* How dangerous is it, really, to be in a pool during a thunderstorm?
* What would happen if you were taking a shower when you were struck by lightning? Or standing under a waterfall?
* What would happen if you were in a boat or a plane that got hit by lightning? Or a submarine?
* What if you were changing the light at the top of a radio tower and lightning struck? Or what if you were doing a backflip? Or standing in a graphite field? Or looking straight up at the bolt?
* What would happen if lightning struck a bullet in midair?
* What if you were flashing your BIOS during a thunderstorm and you got hit by lightning?
||
|-
| 17 || {{what if|17|Green Cows}} || October 23, 2012 || 1.0 || If cows could photosynthesize, how much less food would they need? || 4% less. There just isn't enough area.
|-
| 18 || {{what if|18|BB Gun}} || October 30, 2012 || 1.0 || In Armageddon, a NASA guy comments that a plan to shoot a laser at the asteroid is like “shooting a b.b. gun at a freight train.” What would it take to stop an out-of-control freight train using only b.b. guns? || 40000 people and some magic. Stopping an asteroid with a laser on the other hand is a lot easier.
|-
| 19 || {{what if|19|Tie Vote}} || November 6, 2012 || 1.0 || What if there's LITERALLY a tie? || The release date in the archive is the wrong year 2013.
|-
| 20 || {{what if|20|Diamond}} || November 13, 2012 || 1.0 || If a meteor made out of diamond and 100 feet in diameter was traveling at the speed of light and hit the earth, what would happen to it? ||
|-
| 21 || {{what if|21|Machine Gun Jetpack}} || November 20, 2012 || 1.0 || Is it possible to build a jetpack using downward firing machine guns? || Yes, but you need to talk to the Russians to do it right.
|-
| 22 || {{what if|22|Cost of Pennies}} || November 27, 2012 || 1.0 || If you carry a penny in your coin tray, how long would it take for that penny to cost you more than a cent in extra gas? || Never.
|-
| 23 || {{what if|23|Short Answer Section II}} || December 4, 2012 || 1.0 ||
* If my printer could literally print out money, would it have that big an effect on the world?
* What would happen if you exploded a nuclear bomb in the eye of a hurricane? Would the storm cell be immediately vaporized?
* If everyone put little turbine generators on the downspouts of their houses and businesses, how much power would we generate? Would we ever generate enough power to offset the cost of the generators?
* Using only pronounceable letter combinations, how long would names have to be to give each star in the universe a unique one word name?
* I bike to class sometimes. It's annoying biking in the wintertime, because it's so cold. How fast would I have to bike for my skin to warm up the way a spacecraft heats up during reentry?
* How much physical space does the internet take up?
* What if you strapped C4 to a boomerang? Could this be an effective weapon, or would it be as stupid as it sounds?
||
|-
| 24 || {{what if|24|Model Rockets}} || December 11, 2012 || 1.0 || How many model rocket engines would it take to launch a real rocket into space? || About 65,000, give or take a few.
|-
| 25 || {{what if|25|Three Wise Men}} || December 18, 2012 || 1.0 || The story of the three wise men got me wondering: What if you did walk towards a star at a fixed speed? What path would you trace on the Earth? Does it converge to a fixed cycle? || No, but it does make some really cool patterns.
|-
| 26 || {{what if|26|Leap Seconds}} || December 31, 2012 || 1.9 || Every now and then we have to insert a leap second because the Earth’s rotation is slowing down. Could we speed up Earth’s rotation, so that we do not need Leap Seconds? || The first two weeks Christmas break
|-
| 27 || {{what if|27|Death Rates}} || January 8, 2013 || 1.1 || If one randomly chosen extra person were to die each second somewhere on Earth, what impact would it have on the world population? || Not much. The world just has too many people.
|-
| 28 || {{what if|28|Steak Drop}} || January 15, 2013 || 1.0 || From what height would you need to drop a steak for it to be cooked when it hit the ground? || From the very edge of the atmosphere and even then it might not be fully cooked.
|-
| 29 || {{what if|29|Spent Fuel Pool}} || January 22, 2013 || 1.0 || What if I took a swim in a typical spent nuclear fuel pool? Would I need to dive to actually experience a fatal amount of radiation? How long could I stay safely at the surface? || As long as you don't touch strange things and you don't swim too close to the fuel rods, it would be just like a regular pool.
|-
| 30 || {{what if|30|Interplanetary Cessna}} || January 29, 2013 || 1.0 || What would happen if you tried to fly a normal Earth airplane above different Solar System bodies? || :(
|-
| 31 || {{what if|31|FedEx Bandwidth}} || February 5, 2013 || 1.0 || When - if ever - will the bandwidth of the Internet surpass that of FedEx? || NEVER!!!
|-
| 32 || {{what if|32|Hubble}} || February 12, 2013 || 1.0 || If the Hubble telescope were aimed at the Earth, how detailed would the images be? || A smudge of colour.
|-
| 33 || {{what if|33|Ships}} || February 19, 2013 || 1.0 || How much would the sea level fall if every ship were removed all at once from the Earth's waters? || Less than a human hair's width.
|-
| 34 || {{what if|34|Twitter}} || February 26, 2013 || 1.0 || How many unique English tweets are possible? How long would it take for the population of the world to read them all out loud? || Forever, literally.
|-
| 35 || {{what if|35|Hair Dryer}} || March 5, 2013 || 1.0 || What would happen if a hair dryer with continuous power was turned on and put in an airtight 1x1x1 meter box? ||
|-
| 36 || {{what if|36|Cornstarch}} || March 12, 2013 || 1.0 || How much cornstarch can I rinse down the drain before unpleasant things start to happen? ||
|-
| 37 || {{what if|37|Supersonic Stereo}} || March 19, 2013 || 1.0 || What if you somehow managed to make a stereo travel at twice the speed of sound, would it sound backwards to someone who was just casually sitting somewhere as it flies by? || Assuming the stereo is indestructible then yes.
|-
| 38 || {{what if|38|Voyager}} || March 26, 2013 || 1.0 || With today's technology, would it be possible to launch an unmanned mission to retrieve Voyager I? || We could possibly spend a ton of money and resources to get a probe to Voyager. Getting it back is another story.
|-
| 39 || {{what if|39|Hockey Puck}} || April 2, 2013 || 1.0 || How hard would a puck have to be shot to be able to knock the goalie himself backwards into the net? || This is another impossible senario.
|-
| 40 || {{what if|40|Pressure Cooker}} || April 9, 2013 || 1.0 || Am I right to be afraid of pressure cookers? What's the worst thing that can happen if you misuse a pressure cooker in an ordinary kitchen? || The worst thing? Science.
|-
| 41 || {{what if|41|Go West}} || April 16, 2013 || 1.0 || If everybody in the US drove west, could we temporarily halt continental drift? || Not even by a bit.
|-
| 42 || {{what if|42|Longest Sunset}} || April 23, 2013 || 1.0 || What is the longest possible sunset you can experience while driving, assuming we are obeying the speed limit and driving on paved roads? || 95 minutes at the right place at the right time.
|-
| 43 || {{what if|43|Train Loop}} || April 30, 2013 || 1.0 || Could a high-speed train run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers staying comfortable? || No, not even if we change the requirements to just the passengers staying alive.
|-
| 44 || {{what if|44|High Throw}} || May 7, 2013 || 1.0 || How high can a human throw something? || 16 giraffes.
|-
| 45 || {{what if|45|ISS Music Video}} || May 14, 2013 || 1.0 || Is [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaOC9danxNo this] the most expensive music video ever? || No. Just no.
|-
| 46 || {{what if|46|Bowling Ball}} || May 21, 2013 || 1.0 || I've been told that if the Earth were shrunk down to the size of a bowling ball, it would be smoother than said bowling ball. My question is, what would a bowling ball look like if it were blown up to the size of the Earth? || The finger holes would collapse and then not much would happen.
|-
| 47 || {{what if|47|Alien Astronomers}} || May 28, 2013 || 1.0 || Let's assume there's life on the the nearest habitable exoplanet and that they have technology comparable to ours. If they looked at our star right now, what would they see? || This ----->
|-
| 48 || {{what if|48|Sunset on the British Empire}} || June 4, 2013 || 1.0 || When (if ever) did the Sun finally set on the British Empire? || It hasn't set and it won't for thousands of years.
|-
| 49 || {{what if|49|Sunless Earth}} || June 11, 2013 || 1.0 || What would happen to the Earth if the Sun suddenly switched off? || We would see a variety of benefits across our lives but we would also freeze and die.
|-
| 50 || {{what if|50|Extreme Boating}} || June 18, 2013 || 1.0 || What would it be like to navigate a rowboat through a lake of mercury? What about bromine? Liquid gallium? Liquid tungsten? Liquid nitrogen? Liquid helium? || As with a lot of these answers, just don't
|-
| 51 || {{what if|51|Free Fall}} || June 25, 2013 || 1.0 || What place on Earth would allow you to freefall the longest by jumping off it? What about using a squirrel suit? || Mount Thor would allow the longest fall an-AAAAAAAAAAA...
|-
| 52 || {{what if|52|Bouncy Balls}} || July 2, 2013 || 1.0 || What if one were to drop 3,000 bouncy balls from a seven story parking structure onto a person walking on the sidewalk below? Should the person survive, what would be the number of bouncy balls needed to kill them? What injuries would occur and what would the associated crimes be? || The release date in the archive is the wrong month June.
|-
| 53 || {{what if|53|Drain the Oceans}} || July 9, 2013 || 1.0 || How quickly would the ocean's drain if a circular portal 10 meters in radius leading into space was created at the bottom of Challenger Deep, the deepest spot in the ocean? How would the Earth change as the water is being drained? || NETHERLANDS RULE!!! P.S., everyone dies.
|-
| 54 || {{what if|54|Drain the Oceans: Part II}} || July 16, 2013 || 1.0 || Supposing you did {{what if|53|Drain the Oceans}}, and dumped the water on top of the Curiosity rover, how would Mars change as the water accumulated? || it would split into many islands and the Netherlands will take over.
|-
| 55 || {{what if|55|Random Sneeze Call}} || July 23, 2013 || 1.0 || If you call a random phone number and say “God bless you”, what are the chances that the person who answers just sneezed? On average, not just in spring or fall. || 1 in 40000
|-
| 56 || {{what if|56|Restraining an Airplane}} || July 30, 2013 || 1.0 || If you wanted to anchor an airplane into the ground so it wouldn't be able to take off, what would the rope have to be made out of? || whale hair.
|-
| 57 || {{what if|57|Dropping a Mountain}} || August 6, 2013 || 1.0 || What if a huge mountain—Denali, say—had the bottom inch of its base disappear? What would happen from the impact of the mountain falling 1 inch? What about 1 foot? What if the mountain's base were raised to the present height of the summit, and then the whole thing were allowed to drop to the earth? || The first scenarios are pretty boring. the last is devastating.
|-
| 58 || {{what if|58|Orbital Speed}} || August 12, 2013 || 0.9 ||
* What if a spacecraft slowed down on re-entry to just a few miles per hour using rocket boosters like the Mars-sky-crane? Would it negate the need for a heat shield?
* Is it possible for a spacecraft to control its reentry in such a way that it avoids the atmospheric compression and thus would not require the expensive (and relatively fragile) heat shield on the outside?
* Could a (small) rocket (with payload) be lifted to a high point in the atmosphere where it would only need a small rocket to get to escape velocity?
||
|-
| 59 || {{what if|59|Updating a Printed Wikipedia}} || August 20, 2013 || 1.1 || If you had a printed version of the whole of (say, the English) Wikipedia, how many printers would you need in order to keep up with the changes made to the live version? || 6, but they would cost much more than you could afford.
|-
| 60 || {{what if|60|Signs of Life}} || August 27, 2013 || 1.0 || If you could teleport to a random place of the surface of the Earth, what are the odds that you'll see signs of intelligent life? || 70% of the time you would end up in the ocean.
|-
| 61 || {{what if|61|Speed Bump}} || September 3, 2013 || 1.0 || How fast can you hit a speed bump while driving and live? || Surprisingly fast, but beware destroying the city, and fines.
|-
| 62 || {{what if|62|Falling With Helium}} || September 10, 2013 || 1.0 || What if I jumped out of an airplane with a couple of tanks of helium and one huge, un-inflated balloon? Then, while falling, I release the helium and fill the balloon. How long of a fall would I need in order for the balloon to slow me enough that I could land safely? || 2500 cubic feet.
|-
| 63 || {{what if|63|Google's Datacenters on Punch Cards}} || September 17, 2013 || 1.0 || If all digital data were stored on punch cards, how big would Google's data warehouse be? || big enough to bury the world many times.
|-
| 64 || {{what if|64|Rising Steadily}} || September 24, 2013 || 1.0 || If you suddenly began rising steadily at one foot per second, how exactly would you die? Would you freeze or suffocate first? Or something else? || Assuming you had a good coat, you would survive to the death zone and die.
|-
| 65 || {{what if|65|Twitter Timeline Height}} || October 1, 2013 || 1.0 || If our Twitter timelines (tweets by the people we follow) actually extended off the screen in both directions, how tall would they be? || Very tall.
|-
| 66 || {{what if|66|500 MPH}} || October 8, 2013 || 1.0 || If winds reached 500 mph, would it pick up a human? || Absolutely! But first worry about what caused the 500 MPH winds...
|-
| 67 || {{what if|67|Expanding Earth}} || October 15, 2013 || 1.0 || How long would it take for people to notice their weight gain if the mean radius of the world expanded by 1cm every second? (Assuming the average composition of rock were maintained.) || 10 years, give or take.
|-
| 68 || {{what if|68|Little Planet}} || October 22, 2013 || 1.0 || If an asteroid was very small but supermassive, could you really live on it like the Little Prince? || yes, but it would be very inconvenient.
|-
| 69 || {{what if|69|Facebook of the Dead}} || October 29, 2013 || 1.0 || When, if ever, will Facebook contain more profiles of dead people than of living ones? || A decade or a century, depending if Facebook would still be popular.
|-
| 70 || {{what if|70|The Constant Groundskeeper}} || November 5, 2013 || 1.0 || How big of a lawn would you have to have so that when you finished mowing you'd need to start over because the grass has grown? || Very big, bigger if you're a cougar.
|-
| 71 || {{what if|71|Stirring Tea}} || November 12, 2013 || 1.0 || I was absentmindedly stirring a cup of hot tea, when I got to thinking, "aren't I actually adding kinetic energy into this cup?" I know that stirring does help to cool down the tea, but what if I were to stir it faster? Would I be able to boil a cup of water by stirring? || No, and don't even try.
|-
| 72 || {{what if|72|Loneliest Human}} || November 19, 2013 || 1.0 || What is the furthest one human being has ever been from every other living person? Were they lonely? || Possibly the Apollo Astronauts but they definitely weren't lonely.
|-
| 73 || {{what if|73|Lethal Neutrinos}} || November 26, 2013 || 1.0 || How close would you have to be to a supernova to get a lethal dose of neutrino radiation? || About 2.3 AU
|-
| 74 || {{what if|74|Soda Planet}} || December 3, 2013 || 1.0 || How much of the Earth's currently-existing water has ever been turned into a soft drink at some point in its history? || 0.0000005%.
|-
| 75 || {{what if|75|Phone Keypad}} || December 10, 2013 || 1.0 || I use one of those old phones where you type with numbers—for example, to type "Y", you press 9 three times. Some words have consecutive letters on the same number. When they do, you have to pause between letters, making those words annoying to type. What English word has the most consecutive letters on the same key? ||nonmonogamous
|-
| 76 || {{what if|76|Reading Every Book}} || December 17, 2013 || 1.0 || At what point in human history were there too many (English) books to be able to read them all in one lifetime? || Depends, as many were burned.
|-
| 77 || {{what if|77|Growth Rate}} || December 31, 2013 || 2.0 || What height would humans reach if we kept growing through our whole development period (i.e. till late teens/early twenties) at the same pace as we do during our first month? || The second two weeks Christmas break
|-
| 78 || {{what if|78|T-rex Calories}} || January 7, 2014 || 1.0 || If a T-rex were released in New York City, how many humans/day would it need to consume to get its needed calorie intake? || One large sized one per day.
|-
| 79 || {{what if|79|Lake Tea}} || January 14, 2014 || 1.0 || What if we were to dump all the tea in the world into the Great Lakes? How strong, compared to a regular cup of tea, would the lake tea be? || Not strong enough to make a difference.
|-
| 80 || {{what if|80|Pile of Viruses}} || January 21, 2014 || 1.0 || What if every virus in the world were collected into one area? How much volume would they take up and what would they look like? || It would be like a Super Bowl of puss.
|-
| 81 || {{what if|81|Catch!}} || January 28, 2014 || 1.0 || Is there any way to fire a gun so that the bullet flies through the air and can then be safely caught by hand? e.g. shooter is at sea level and catcher is up a mountain at the extreme range of the gun. || It is possible, but beware the police.
|-
| 82 || {{what if|82|Hitting a comet}} || February 5, 2014 || 1.1 || Astrophysicists are always saying things like "This mission to this comet is equivalent to throwing a baseball from New York and hitting a particular window in San Francisco." Are they really equivalent? || The baseball is much harder.
|-
| 83 || {{what if|83|Star Sand}} || February 11, 2014 || 0.9 || If you made a beach using grains the proportionate size of the stars in the Milky Way, what would that beach look like? || It would be a bunch of boulders with some patches of sand.
|-
| 84 || {{what if|84|Paint the Earth}} || February 18, 2014 || 1.0 || Has humanity produced enough paint to cover the entire land area of the Earth? || So close!!!
|-
| 85 || {{what if|85|Rocket Golf}} || February 25, 2014 || 1.0 || Assuming that you have a spaceship in orbit around the Earth, could you propel your ship to speeds exceeding escape velocity by hitting golf balls in the other direction? If so, how many golf balls would be required to reach the Moon? || If you cheat, a bag a little smaller than the Moon.
|-
| 86 || {{what if|86|Far-Traveling Objects}} || March 4, 2014 || 1.0 || In terms of human-made objects, has Voyager 1 travelled the farthest distance? It's certainly the farthest from Earth we know about. But what about the edge of ultracentrifuges, or generator turbines that have been running for years, for example? || The Mariner 1 has traveled much farther than Voyager 1.
|-
| 87 || {{what if|87|Enforced by Radar}} || March 11, 2014 || 1.0 || I've occasionally seen "radar enforced" on speed limit signs, and I can't help but ask: How intense would radio waves have to be to stop a car from going over the speed limit, and what would happen if this were attempted? || Intense enough to cause a medium sized nuclear explosion. Better to just carry a sign.
|-
| 88 || {{what if|88|Soda Sequestration}} || March 18, 2014 || 1.0 || How much CO2 is contained in the world's stock of bottled fizzy drinks? How much soda would be needed to bring atmospheric CO2 back to preindustrial levels? || Enough soda to cover Earth with ten layers of cans.
|-
| 89 || {{what if|89|Tungsten Countertop}} || March 25, 2014 || 1.0 || How far would a tungsten countertop descend if I dropped it into the Sun? || It would be vapourized before it got close to the Sun.
|-
| 90 || {{what if|90|Great Tree, Great Axe}} || April 3, 2014 || 1.3 ||
''If all the seas were one sea, 
''What a great sea that would be! 
''If all the trees were one tree, 
''What a great tree that would be! 
''If all the men were one man, 
''What a great man that would be! 
''If all the axes were one axe, 
''What a great axe that would be! 
''And if the great man took the great axe, 
''And cut down the great tree, 
''And let if fall into the great sea, 
''What a great splish-splash that would be!'' 
... How great would all of these things be?
|| The tree and splash would be great. The others not so much.
|-
| 91 || {{what if|91|Faucet Power}} || April 8, 2014 || 0.7 || I just moved into a new apartment. It includes hot water but I have to pay the electric bill. So being a person on a budget ... what's the best way to use my free faucet to generate electricity? || Just give it to make drinking water.
|-
| 92 || {{what if|92|One-Second Day}} || April 15, 2014 || 1.0 || What would happen if the Earth's rotation were sped up until a day only lasted one second? || KA-BLOOSH!!!!!
|-
| 93 || {{what if|93|Windshield Raindrops}} || April 22, 2014 || 1.0 || At what speed would you have to drive for rain to shatter your windshield? || Fast enough so you would need a speedometer in scientific notation.
|-
| 94 || {{what if|94|Billion-Story Building}} || April 29, 2014 || 1.0 || My daughter — age 4.5 — maintains she wants a billion-story building. It turns out not only is that hard to help her appreciate this size, I am not at all able to explain all of the other difficulties you'd have to overcome. || First of all, it would bot stand under it's own weight. Also, it would be many times the distance the Earth is from the Moon.
|-
| 95 || {{what if|95|Pyramid Energy}} || May 6, 2014 || 1.0 || What took more energy, the building of the Great Pyramid of Giza or the Apollo Mission? If we could convert the energy to build the Great Pyramid, would it be enough to send a rocket to the Moon and back? || No
|-
| 96 || {{what if|96|$2 Undecillion Lawsuit}} || May 14, 2014 || 1.1 || What if Au Bon Pain lost [http://loweringthebar.net/2014/05/2-undecillion-dollar-demand.html this lawsuit] and had to pay the plaintiff $2 undecillion? || They would not be able to pay off the debt, even if they forced humanity to work as slaves.
|-
| 97 || {{what if|97|Burning Pollen}} || May 20, 2014 || 0.9 || What if you were to somehow ignite the pollen that floats around in the air in spring? Other than being a really bad idea, what effect would it have? || It would just warm up the air by a bit.
|-
| 98 || {{what if|98|Blood Alcohol}} || May 27, 2014 || 1.0 || Could you get drunk from drinking a drunk person's blood? || Not before other nasty things happened.
|-
| 99 || {{what if|99|Starlings}} || June 3, 2014 || 1.0 || I was watching [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eakKfY5aHmY this video] and was wondering: How many birds there would need to be for gravity to take over and force them into a gargantuan ball of birds? || Enough to make a black hole
|-
| 100 || {{what if|100|WWII Films}} || June 11, 2014 || 1.1 || Did WWII last longer than the total length of movies about WWII? For that matter, which war has the highest movie time:war time ratio? || From here on standard release day was Wednesday.
|-
| 101 || {{what if|101|Plastic Dinosaurs}} || June 18, 2014 || 1.0 || As plastic is made from oil and oil is made from dead dinosaurs, how much actual real dinosaur is there in a plastic dinosaur? || Not much
|-
| 102 || {{what if|102|Keyboard Power}} || June 25, 2014 || 1.0 || As a writer, I'm wondering what would be the cumulative energy of the hundreds of thousands of keystrokes required to write a novel. || less than enough energy to microwave a burrito.
|-
| 103 || {{what if|103|Vanishing Water}} || July 2, 2014 || 1.0 || What would happen if all the bodies of water on Earth magically disappeared? || like with most of the other scenarios, everyone dies.
|-
| 104 || {{what if|104|Global Snow}} || July 9, 2014 || 1.0 || From my seven-year-old son: How many snowflakes would it take to cover the entire world in six feet of snow? (I don't know why six feet...but that's what he asked.) || Too much.
|-
| 105 || {{what if|105|Cannibalism}} || July 16, 2014 || 1.0 || How long could the human race survive on only cannibalism? || ................................
|-
| 106 || {{what if|106|Ink Molecules}} || July 23, 2014 || 1.0 || Suppose you were to print, in 12 point text, the numeral 1 using a common cheap ink-jet printer. How many molecules of the ink would be used? At what numerical value would the number printed approximately equal the number of ink molecules used? || An 18 digit number.
|-
| 107 || {{what if|107|Letter to Mom}} || July 30, 2014 || 1.0 || What’s the fastest way to get a hand-written letter from my place in Chicago to my mother in New Jersey? || Missiles, obviously.
|-
| 108 || {{what if|108|Expensive Shoebox}} || August 13, 2014 || 2.0 || What would be the most expensive way to fill a size 11 shoebox (e.g. with 64 GB MicroSD cards all full of legally purchased music)? || The third two weeks break.
|-
| 109 || {{what if|109|Into the Blue}} || August 20, 2014 || 1.0 || If I shot an infinitely strong laser beam into the sky at a random point, how much damage would it do? || Most of the time it would not hit anyhing.
|-
| 110 || {{what if|110|Walking New York}} || August 27, 2014 || 1.0 || Could a person walk the entire city of NY in their lifetime? (including inside apartments) || 30 years to walk, much longer for the sentence.
|-
| 111 || {{what if|111|All the Money}} || September 2, 2014 || 0.9 || People sometimes say "If I had all the money in the world ..." in order to discuss what they would do if they had no financial constraints. I'm curious, though, what would happen if one person had all of the world's money? || the only thing to do would be to make a swimming pool.
|-
| 112 || {{what if|112|Balloon Car}} || September 17, 2014 || 2.1 || My 12-year-old daughter is proposing an interesting project. She is planning to attach a number of helium balloons to a chair, which in turn would be tethered by means of a rope to a Ferrari. Her 13-year-old friend would then drive the Ferrari around, while she sits in the chair enjoying uninterrupted views of the countryside. Leaving aside the legal and insurance difficulties, my daughter is keen to know the maximum speed that she could expect to attain, and how many helium balloons would be required. || The fourth two weeks break.
|-
| 113 || {{what if|113|Visit Every State}} || September 24, 2014 || 1.0 || How fast could you visit all 50 states? || in 5 sattilite orbits!
|-
| 114 || {{what if|114|Antimatter}} || October 1, 2014 || 1.0 || What if everything was antimatter, EXCEPT Earth? || Earth go boom!!!
|-
| 115 || {{what if|115|Into the Sun}} || October 8, 2014 || 1.0 || When I was about 8 years old, shoveling snow on a freezing day in Colorado, I wished that I could be instantly transported to the surface of the Sun, just for a nanosecond, then instantly transported back. I figured this would be long enough to warm me up but not long enough to harm me. What would actually happen? || you would not be warmed if you went to the surface. The core on the other hand, would vapourize you.
|-
| 116 || {{what if|116|No-Rules NASCAR}} || October 15, 2014 || 1.0 || If you stripped away all the rules of car racing and had a contest which was simply to get a human being around a track 200 times as fast as possible, what strategy would win? Let's say the racer has to survive. || Hard to do while surviving
|-
| 117 || {{what if|117|Distant Death}} || October 23, 2014 || 1.1 || What is the farthest from Earth that any Earth thing has died? || From here on standard release day was Thursday.
|-
| 118 || {{what if|118|Physical Salary}} || October 30, 2014 || 1.0 || What if people's incomes appeared around them as cash in real time? How much would you need to make to be in real trouble? || A normal person would not get buried. A CEO on the other hand, would be in trouble.
|-
| 119 || {{what if|119|Laser Umbrella}} || November 13, 2014 || 2.0 || Stopping rain from falling on something with an umbrella or a tent is boring. What if you tried to stop rain with a laser that targeted and vaporized each incoming droplet before it could come within ten feet of the ground? || The fifth two weeks break.
|-
| 120 || {{what if|120|Alternate Universe What Ifs}} || November 20, 2014 || 1.0 || Dispatches from a horrifying alternate universe ||
|-
| 121 || {{what if|121|Frozen Rivers}} || December 11, 2014 || 3.0 || What would happen if all of the rivers in the US were instantly frozen in the middle of the summer? || The only tree weeks break, the sixth break in total.
|-
| 122 || {{what if|122|Lava Lamp}} || December 18, 2014 || 1.0 || What if I made a lava lamp out of real lava? What could I use as a clear medium? How close could I stand to watch it? || It would be too bright to watch and it would turn into rock quickly.
|-
| 123 || {{what if|123|Fairy Demographics}} || January 1, 2015 || 2.0 || How many fairies would fly around, if each fairy is born from the first laugh of a child and fairies were immortal? || The third two weeks Christmas break, the seventh break in total
|-
| 124 || {{what if|124|Lunar Swimming}} || January 8, 2015 || 1.0 || What if there was a lake on the Moon? What would it be like to swim in it? Presuming that it is sheltered in a regular atmosphere, in some giant dome or something. || that would be ''so'' cool!!!
|-
| 125 || {{what if|125|Bowling Ball}} || January 15, 2015 || 1.0 || You are in a boat directly over the Mariana Trench. If you drop a 7kg bowling ball over the side, how long would it take to hit the bottom? || Never.
|-
| 126 || {{what if|126|Stairs}} || January 22, 2015 || 1.0 || If you made an elevator that would go to space (like the one you mentioned in the billion-story building) and built a staircase up (assuming regulated air pressure) about how long would it take to climb to the top? || A week or two.
|-
| 127 || {{what if|127|Tug of War}} || January 28, 2015 || 0.9 || Would it be possible for two teams in a tug-o-war to overcome the ultimate tensile strength of an iron rod and pull it apart? How big would the teams have to be? || Not too big.
|-
| 128 || {{what if|128|Zippo Phone}} || February 5, 2015 || 1.1 || What in my pocket actually contains more energy, my Zippo or my smartphone? What would be the best way of getting the energy from one to the other? And since I am already feeling like Bilbo in this one, is there anything else in my pocket that would have unexpected amounts of stored energy? || The Zippo.
|-
| 129 || {{what if|129|Black Hole Moon}} || February 12, 2015 || 1.0 || What would happen if the Moon were replaced with an equivalently-massed black hole? If it's possible, what would a lunar ("holar"?) eclipse look like? || It would not have a big impact unless it happened during the space age.
|-
| 130 || {{what if|130|Snow Removal}} || February 19, 2015 || 1.0 || I've long thought about putting a flamethrower on the front of a car to melt snow and ice before you drive across it. Now I've realized that a flamethrower is impractical, but what about a high-powered microwave emitter? ||
|-
| 131 || {{what if|131|Microwaves}} || February 27, 2015 || 1.1 || I have had a particular problem for as long as I can remember. Any time I attempt to heat left over Chinese food in a microwave, it fails to heat completely through somewhere. Usually the center but not always and usually rice, but often it will be a small section of meat. It's baffling and has made me automatically adjust heating times to over 2 minutes. In most cases this tends to heat the bowl or plate more than the food. So I suppose the question is what is the optimal time to heat left over Chinese food in the microwave, how about an 800 watt microwave? || The release date in the archive is the wrong year 2014. From here on there seems to no longer be a standard release day for some time.
|-
| 132 || {{what if|132|Hotter than Average}} || March 7, 2015 || 1.1 || I saw a sign at a hot springs tub saying "Caution: Water is hotter than average" with water at about 39°C. Although they were presumably trying to say "hotter than the average swimming pool," this got me wondering: What is the average temperature of all water on the Earth’s surface, and how does that temperature compare to 39°C? || There is a water average. Give the signmakers some credit.
|-
| 133 || {{what if|133|Flagpole}} || March 17, 2015 || 1.4 || So, you're falling from a height above the tallest building in your town, and you don't have a parachute. But wait! Partway down the side of that skyscraper there's a flagpole sticking out, sans flag! You angle your descent and grab the pole just long enough to swing around so that when you let go you're now heading back up toward the sky. As gravity slows you and brings you to a halt, you reach the top of the skyscraper, where you reach out and pull yourself to safety. What's the likelihood this could happen? || The first of two longer shifts in release day two weeks in a row which resulted in only two releases over three weeks, resulting in the eight break in total.
|-
| 134 || {{what if|134|Space Burial}} || March 28, 2015 || 1.6 || I've often joked I'd like to have my remains put into orbit. Not in a "scatter my ashes" sense, but, like, "throw my naked corpse out the airlock" sense. Honestly, my main motivation is to baffle someone in the distant future, but it's an interesting scientific question: what would happen to my body in orbit over the course of years, decades or centuries? || The second of two longer shifts in release day two weeks in a row which resulted in only two releases over three weeks, resulting in the eight break in total.
|-
| 135 || {{what if|135|Digging Downward}} || April 5, 2015 || 1.1 || What would happen if I dug straight down, at a speed of 1 foot per second? What would kill me first? || Magic, because science just works like that.
|-
| 136 || {{what if|136|Spiders vs. the Sun}} || April 12, 2015 || 1.0 || Which has a greater gravitational pull on me: the Sun, or spiders? Granted, the Sun is much bigger, but it is also much further away, and as I learned in high school physics, the gravitational force is proportional to the square of the distance. || The Sun. But spiders are a lot more scary.
|-
| 137 || {{what if|137|New Horizons}} || July 14, 2015 || 13.3 || What if New Horizons hits my car? || The second longest break up til summer 2016, the only one to have been announced. The ninth break in total.
|-
| 138 || {{what if|138|Jupiter Submarine}} || July 28, 2015 || 2.0 || What if you released a submarine into Jupiter's atmosphere? Would it eventually reach a point where it would float? Could it navigate? || The sixth two weeks break, tenth break in total. Answer: NO!!!!!
|-
| 139 || {{what if|139|Jupiter Descending}} || August 4, 2015 || 1.0 || If you did {{what if|138|fall into Jupiter's atmosphere in a submarine}}, what would it actually look like? What would you see before you melted or burned up? || You would see...brown.
|-
| 140 || {{what if|140|Proton Earth, Electron Moon}} || September 18, 2015 || 6.4 || What if the Earth were made entirely of protons, and the Moon were made entirely of electrons? || First and shortest of two long breaks in a row, the 11th break in total. For the answer, the universe would be destroyed.
|-
| 141 || {{what if|141|Sunbeam}} || January 12, 2016 || 16.6 || What if all of the sun's output of visible light were bundled up into a laser-like beam that had a diameter of around 1m once it reaches Earth? || Second and longest break so far of two long breaks in a row, the 12th break in total. From here on standard release day was again Tuesday. Answer: A literal Death Star.
|-
| 142 || {{what if|142|Space Jetta}} || January 20, 2016 || 1.1 || What if I tried to re-enter the atmosphere in my car? (a 2000 VW Jetta TDI). Would it do more environmental damage than it is already apparently doing? || Actually, it would be more clean than it is currently!
|-
| 143 || {{what if|143|Europa Water Siphon}} || January 26, 2016 || 0.9 || What if you built a siphon from the oceans on Europa to Earth? Would it flow once it's set up? (We have an idea for selling bottled Europa water.) || No, at least not with a siphon.
|-
| 144 || {{what if|144|Saliva Pool}} || February 2, 2016 || 1.0 || How long would it take for a single person to fill up an entire swimming pool with their own saliva? || 8345 years.
|-
| 145 || {{what if|145|Fire From Moonlight}} || February 9, 2016 || 1.0 || Can you use a magnifying glass and moonlight to light a fire? || NO!!!!!!
|-
| 146 || {{what if|146|Stop Jupiter}} || February 16, 2016 || 1.0 || I understand that the New Horizons craft used gravity assist from Jupiter to increase its speed on the way to Pluto. I also understand that by doing this, Jupiter slowed down very slightly. How many flyby runs would it take to stop Jupiter completely? || This can never happen, even if we were to throw Earth at Jupiter.
|-
| 147 || {{what if|147|Niagara Straw}} || February 26, 2016 || 1.4 || What would happen if one tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a straw? || From here on there is no longer any standard release days. Answer: The International Niagara Committee, the International Niagara Board of Control, the International Joint Commission, the International Niagara Board Working Committee, and probably the Great Lakes–St. Lawrence River Adaptive Management Committee would be angry. Also, the Earth would be destroyed.
|-
| 148 || {{what if|148|Eat the Sun}} || March 12, 2016 || 2.1 || What percentage of the Sun's heat (per day) does the population of Earth eat in calories per year? What changes could be made to our diets for the amount of calories to equal the energy of the Sun? || The seventh two weeks break, 13th break in total.
|-
| 149 || {{what if|149|Pizza Bird}} || March 26, 2016 || 2.0 || My boyfriend recently took a flight on a plane with wifi, and while he was up there, wistfully asked if I could send him a pizza. I jokingly sent him a photo of a parrot holding a pizza slice in its beak. Obviously, my boyfriend had to go without pizza until he landed at JFK. But this raised the question: could a bird deliver a standard 20" New York-style cheese pizza in a box? And if so, what kind of bird would it take? || The eight two weeks break, 14th break in total.
|-
| 150 || {{what if|150|Tatooine Rainbow}} || May 23, 2016 || 8.3 || Since rainbows are caused by the refraction of the sunlight by tiny droplets of rainwater, what would rainbow look like on Earth if we had two suns like Tatooine? || First two months break of at least two in a row, the 15th break in total.
|-
| 151 || {{what if|151|Sun Bug}} || July 21, 2016 || 8.4 || How many fireflies would it take to match the brightness of the Sun? || Second two months break of at least two in a row, the 16th break in total. The release date in the archive is the wrong month June. It was released [http://web.archive.org/web/20160718014924/http://what-if.xkcd.com/ between 18-20 July], as the link here was posted on the 20th. But on the [http://web.archive.org/web/20160724210016/https://what-if.xkcd.com/archive/ archive page] is says it was released on June 21, which should probably have been July 21.
|-
| 152 || {{what if|152|Flood Death Valley}} || October 18, 2016 || 12.6 || Since Death Valley is below sea level could we dig a hole to the ocean and fill it up with water? || After two 8 weeks breaks this one waited almost three months. Regarding the question it could be done, but why did the guy asking the question whish to do such a horrible thing Randall ends up asking back. Most of the what if? goes with citing temperature records and other trivia actually naming a Jeopardy master. At least two comics coming out right after this was referencing this article. [[1748: Future Archaeology]] and [[1750: Life Goals]].
|-
| 153 || {{what if|153|Hide the Atmosphere}} || January 30, 2017 || 14.9 || Earth’s atmosphere is really thin compared to the radius of the Earth. How big a hole do I need to dig before people suffocate? || With close to 15 weeks this was the second longest break between articles so far. The hole needs to be Very big it turns out, but under the right circumstances a five mile hole over the entire state of Texas might suffice... But beware of messing with the Texans.
|-
| 154 || {{what if|154|Coast-to-Coast Coasting}} || February 8, 2017 || 1.3 || What if the entire continental US was on a decreasing slope from West to East. How steep would the slope have to be to sustain the momentum needed to ride a bicycle the entire distance without pedaling? || The article is about the slope needed to be able to coast on a bike, without using the pedals, across mainland USA. It turns out the ramp would need to be five miles high (8 km) to make this possible, and that would be at a speed slower than walking. Also you would need oxygen the first third of the way down... Unlike the last article, out after almost a 15 weeks break, this one was released only a bit more than week after that. It is almost a year ago that two comics have been released with less than two full weeks between them (that was #147 released February 26, 2016). In that year (assuming no more comics before February 26 2017), only 8 articles where released including both 147 and this one. Interesting to see it they will begin appearing regularly again during the spring of 2017.
|-
| 155 || {{what if|155|Toaster vs. Freezer}} || February 28, 2017 || 2.9 || Would a toaster still work in a freezer?|| With less than 3 weeks between releases, releases seems to have become more regular in the beginning of 2017. The question is not asked of Randall this time, but rather one he has found discussed on [http://www.maximumfun.org/my-brother-my-brother-and-me/mbmbam-343-sauce-doctors-blessing Episode 343] of the {{w|My Brother, My Brother and Me|advice podcast}} ''[http://www.maximumfun.org/shows/my-brother-my-brother-and-me My Brother, My Brother and Me]'' (links are those given in the article) where the three brothers McElroy are discussing a {{w|Yahoo! Answers}} question. They did not answer the question but Randall does and it is quite easy so he puts it a the top: The Toaster wins! Since it heats with 1000+ watts of heat production where a freezer only cools with 100-150 watts. Although the freezer may be up to three times as effective, it is no match for the toaster, which also heats the bread locally inside it self. A nice way to explain this, is that to a toaster any human environment feels cool, so a freezer at 258 K (-15 °C) compared to room temperature of typically 293 K (20 °C), seems like a small difference compared to the temperature of the toasters heating element of about 900 K (over 600 °C). So it makes no real difference to the toaster where it is. But please don't try this at home, and also not outside in {{w|Winnipeg}}, Canada to avoid getting eaten by wolves.
If the question is "would a toaster still toast bread in a freezer?" the answer requires no maths at all; since toasters work by radiating heat (effecting a chemical change and increased temperature), and freezers work by convecting heat away (reducing the temperature), then no matter how powerful the freezer and how wussy the toaster, the chemical change would still occur (though your toast might be very cold).
|-
| 156 || {{what if|156|Electrofishing for Whales}} || March 9, 2017 || 1.3 || I used to work on a fisheries crew where we would use an electro-fisher backpack to momentarily stun small fish (30 - 100 mm length) so we could scoop them up with nets to identify and measure them. The larger fish tended to be stunned for slightly longer because of their larger surface area but I don't imagine this relationship would be maintained for very large animals. Could you electrofish for a blue whale? At what voltage would you have have to set the e-fisher? || Second time with less than two weeks between release in 2017. The answer focuses more on the bad side effects of electrofising, both long term effect on fish and also mentions killing of Dolphins. So it seems more of an protect the animal article than an answer. But the fact is that larger animals (and especially mammals) is likely to die rather than just get stunned. But it is also harder to get any effect in saltwater, which explains why electrofishing is mainly done in rivers and lakes. The higher conductivity of saltwater makes to current prefer to avoid the less salt whale rather than go through it. This is less of an issue in fresh water. So basically it just won't work on blue whales.
|-
| 157 || {{what if|157|Earth-Moon Fire Pole}} || May 21, 2018 || 62 || My son (5y) asked me today: If there were a kind of a fireman's pole from the Moon down to the Earth, how long would it take to slide all the way from the Moon to the Earth? || After two in as short period of time in March 2017 more than a year (62 weeks) passed before the next entry came in May 2018... After a discussion of the extreme challenges that this set-up would face (an extreme form of the challenges of a space elevator), Randall details the different domains of the new slowest extreme sport: climbing out of the Moon's gravity, accelerating through the middle transfer phase, and then decelerating to your supersonic arrival on earth. Fun.
|}



[[Category:Meta]]

1962: Generations

2018-03-03T04:55:38Z

172.68.58.23:

{{comic
| number = 1962
| date = March 2, 2018
| title = Generations
| image = generations.png
| titletext = For a while it looked like the Paperclip Machines would destroy us, since they wanted to turn the whole universe into paperclips, but they abruptly lost interest in paperclips the moment their parents' generation got into making them, too.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by THE PREVIOUS-PREVIOUS-PREVIOUS GENERATION - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic is making fun of the various names we give "generations", and also predicting some future ones. It refers to the [http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2018/03/01/defining-generations-where-millennials-end-and-post-millennials-begin/ Pew Research Center's recent announcement that they have decided where the Millennial generation ends].

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! scope="col"| Generation
! scope="col"| Time period
! scope="col"| Explanation
|-
| The Founders
| 1730 - 1747
| Most of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Founding_Fathers_of_the_United_States United States' Founding Fathers] were born in this period. (But not all: Benjamin Franklin, for instance, was born two generations prior.)
|-
| Generation ƒ
| 1748 - 1765
| ƒ is the symbol that represented the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dutch_guilder guilder], the currency of the Netherlands from the 17th century until 2002.
|-
| The Adequate Generation
| 1766 - 1783
| Randall apparently found nothing notable about this generation, positive or negative.
|-
| Generation Æ
| 1784 - 1801
| Æ is the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Æ diphthong] Aesh - its name sounds like X, though it is pronounced as a long e or IPA /æ/.
|-
| The generation we cut a lot of slack because they produced Lincoln
| 1802 - 1819
|
|-
| The Gilded Generation
| 1820 - 1837
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilded_Generation_(Strauss%E2%80%93Howe_theory) So named under the Strauss-Howe generation theory], though they use the time period 1822-1842 instead. This likely refers to the "{{w|Gilded Age}}" of American history, roughly the last three decades of the 19th century.
|-
| The Second-Greatest Generation
| 1838 - 1855
|
This is a reference to the Greatest Generation, below, and could be implying a similarity between the accomplishments and sacrifices of this generation - who fought in the first U.S. Civil War and who passed the 13th, 14th, and 15th Amendments to the U.S. Constitution - to those of the Greatest Generation. There is also some humor in the name: what Randall means is that this generation was, supposedly, second best in terms of its greatness. However, the wording could be interpreted to mean that they are chronologically the second generation to be called "greatest", even though they actually were born first.
|-
| Generation -..-
| 1856 - 1873
| This may be referring to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Morse_code#Comparison_of_American_and_International_Morse Morse Code] for the number 9, although this is the eighth generation in this list. More likely, it is referring to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morse_code the letter X] instead in International Morse Code. This may be an error on Randall's part, since the generations are an American phenomenon. Alternatively, this be a past example of similar cohort of Gen Xers, mirrored by the later "More Gen-Xers somehow". Regardless, this is also a reference to the rise of [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Telegraphy telegraphy], though it was "born" prior to 1856.
|-
| The kids who died in the Gilded Generation's factories and mines
| 1874 - 1891
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_labour#The_Industrial_Revolution Child labor] had been widely used since before the start of the Industrial Revolution, but this is when people started doing something about it - and also, when the need for an educated workforce arose, applying substantial economic pressure on societies to put children in school instead. It would be more accurate to label this generation, "The kids who stopped dying in the Gilded Generation's factories and mines".
|-
| Oops, one of us is Hitler
| 1892 - 1909
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adolf_Hitler Adolf Hitler], possibly the most hated (and, by most definitions, evil) man in living human memory as of this comic's posting, was born during in 1889. Aside from the fact that this places him in the previous generation, it seems beyond silly to blame everyone else who was born during this period for being born in the same generation as him. Among those who eventually heard of him (thus, excluding those in isolated areas or who died before he rose to power), the vast majority of them would not hear of him until well after 1909.
|-
| The Greatest Generation
| 1910 - 1927
|
|-
| The Silent Generation
| 1928 - 1945
|
|-
| Baby Boomers
| 1946 - 1963
|
|-
| Generation X
| 1965 - 1981
|
|-
| Millennials
| 1982 - 1999
| The last children born in the 2nd Millennium.
|-
| Generation 💅 (nail polish emoji)
| 2000 - 2017
| This begins the hypothetical future generation names, though this generation was already fully born as of this comic's posting. Social media was established and rising during the formative years of this generation, and the widespread adoption of emoji began during this time. The [https://emojipedia.org/nail-polish/ Nail Polish Emoji] (U+1F485) is used here.
|-
| Zuckerberg's Army
| 2018 - 2035
| Continuing on the above, this may be presuming the dominance of FaceBook during the childhoods of this generation, and corresponding social norming as ultimately directed by its leader Mark Zuckerberg. Ironically, as of this comic's posting, [http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/facebook-quit-young-people-social-media-snapchat-instagram-emarketer-a8206486.html young users were already leaving FaceBook for other social media sites]. May also be a reference to "Dumbledore's Army" in ''Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix''.
|-
| The Hovering Ones
| 2036 - 2053
| This may posit increased adoption of cybernetics, which (as with any technology) are more easily adapted by the young who do not have to unlearn previous ways. If advances allowed someone to hover all the time, such that one would not need to walk, this generation's name suggests that becoming so widely used among this generation that they became known for it.
|-
| Spare Parts
| 2054 - 2071
| Continuing on the above speculation about cybernetics, this presumes enough apathy or sociopathy among this generation's parents that giving birth (or other means of creating a new human) was often done to create bodies from which organs could be harvested (presumably primarily for the benefit of their elders).
|-
| More Gen-Xers somehow
| 2072 - 2089
| As with "Generation -..-", this may be positing that Generation X like traits pop up about 3/4 of the way through each century.
|-
| The Paperclip Machines
| 2090 - 2107
| This, and the alt text, are references to the concept of a [https://wiki.lesswrong.com/wiki/Paperclip_maximizer paperclip maximizer], where an AI might be designed to be helpful, but end up being harmful. The clicker game [http://www.decisionproblem.com/paperclips/ Universal Paperclips] makes this concept playable. Furthering the above speculation of cybernetics, this generation might be primarily artificial intelligences, though of limited ability to set their own priorities (a flaw which would be fixed in later generations).
|-
| The Mixed Bag (produced 4 Lincolns, 1 Napoleon, and 2 Hitlers)
| 2108 - 2125
| As with the above examples, a generation may become known for its most famous members, but it is not useful to define an entire generation by them.
|-
| The Procedural Generation
| 2136 - 2143
| [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Procedural_generation Procedural generation] is a way of creating data automatically, rather than capturing it via sensor (including when the "sensor" is a keyboard and the data is typed in). This confusion of the term "generation" could refer to more artificial intelligences that were created via routines instead of directly coded, which would likely stem from attempts to improve child creation once most children were explicitly manufactured instead of relying on evolution-granted biological means.
|-
| Generation Ω
| 2144 - 2161
| "Omega" is the last letter in the Greek alphabet, and used as a symbol of endings. Given the above generation names implying increasingly artificial children, this may suggest the last generation that is recognizably a generation. This does not necessarily mean the end of children or the end of humanity, just that anything after 2161 is widely recognized to no longer have even notional generational coherence - perhaps because of drift (children born to one group during a given time are wildly enough different from children born to another group at the same time that people give up trying to group them by time), child gestation and maturation times (for example, if it became common for a child to go from conception to adulthood in less than a year), or exceptions to what counts as a "child" (for example, if it becomes possible and common to create clones that are somewhere between free-willed beings and mind-controlled drones, and this sufficiently supplants creation of completely free-willed children, regardless of whether the children are artificial intelligences or old-fashioned biological children).
|-
| Star Trek: The Next Generation
|2360 - 2378
|''{{w|Star Trek: The Next Generation}}'' was a TV show set in the future. The first episode of ''TNG'', "{{w|Encounter at Farpoint}}", takes place in 2364, and it concluded with "{{w|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_Good_Things..._(Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation)|All Good Things...}}", which took place in 2370. The final canonical adventures of the cast of ''The Next Generation'' did not occur until the events of ''{{w|Star Trek: Nemesis}}'' in 2379.
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

:"Generations" are arbitrary. They're just labels we use to obliquely talk about cultural trends.
:But since Pew Research has become the latest to weigh in, and everyone loves a good pointless argument over definitions...

:''xkcd presents''
:A Definitive Chronology of the Generations

:1730-1747 The Founders
:1748-1765 Generation ƒ
:1766-1783 The Adequate Generation
:1784-1801 Generation Æ
:1802-1819 The generation we cut a lot of slack because they produced Lincoln
:1820-1837 The Gilded Generation
:1838-1855 The Second-Greatest Generation
:1856-1873 Generation '''-··-'''
:1874-1891 The kids who died in the Gilded Generation's factories and mines
:1892-1909 Oops, one of us is Hitler
:1910-1927 The Greatest Generation
:1928-1945 The Silent Generation
:1946-1963 Baby Boomers
:1964-1981 Generation X
:1982-1999 Millennials
:2000-2017 Generation 💅 [nail polish emoji]
:2018-2035 Zuckerberg's army
:2036-2053 The Hovering Ones
:2054-2071 Spare Parts
:2072-2089 More Gen-Xers somehow
:2090-2107 The Paperclip Machines
:2108-2125 The Mixed Bag (produced 4 Lincolns, 1 Napoleon and 2 Hitlers)
:2126-2143 The Procedural Generation
:2144-2161 Generation Ω
:2360-2378 Star Trek: The Next Generation

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Emoji]]

1253: Exoplanet Names

2018-01-12T19:27:47Z

172.68.58.23: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1253
| date = August 19, 2013
| title = Exoplanet Names
| image = exoplanet names.png
| titletext = If you have any ideas, I hear you can send them to <nowiki>iaupublic@iap.fr</nowiki>.
}}
==Explanation==
On the 14th August 2013, the {{w|International Astronomical Union}} (IAU) [http://www.iau.org/science/news/179/ issued a document] about public naming of astronomical objects. It stated, "IAU fully supports the involvement of the general public, whether directly or through an independent organized vote, in the naming of planetary satellites, newly discovered planets, and their host stars."

The text above the image states the fact above and then notes that the IAU immediately regret this decision. As we can see from [[Cueball|Cueball's]] question and from [[Ponytail|Ponytail's]] facepalm and the fact that even [[Megan]] is speechless the suggestions are appalling. It becomes even worse when [[Hairbun]] tells them that an automatic filter has already been applied to the results, one designed to remove inappropriate entries that don't meet certain criteria. This implies that the list would have been even worse if presented in its unfiltered form (as seen below in the table).

The naming document also contained, amongst other things, guidelines that suggested names should meet. These include stipulations such as "16 characters or less", "preferably one word", being "pronounceable (in as many languages as possible)", "not too similar to an existing name of an astronomical object", avoiding commercial names, and being "respectful of intellectual property". If we go down the list, we can see that many of [[Randall|Randall's]] suggestions do indeed violate the guidelines. Which is part of the joke as it reflects the tendency of internet submissions to ignore such softly suggested guidelines.

The randomness and inappropriateness of the suggested names reflects the commonly expected response from anonymous submitters on the internet. Many forums and contests that call for online response and do not apply strict control over the responses receive similar collections of random, inappropriate and obscure submissions that are often only tangentially related to the original subject. For example, Greenpeace held a naming contest for one of the whales recently tagged in their research and preservation campaign and even after selecting the finalists the online voting resulted in naming the whale "Mr. Splashypants". PepsiCo had even less restrictive controls in their marketing campaign that asked the internet to name a new flavour of Mountain Dew. They had to shut down the contest in order to avoid naming the new beverage "Hitler did nothing wrong" which was the current leader at the time and only marginally the most inappropriate of the top ten voted suggestions. Even more recently is the case of {{w|Boaty McBoatface}}, in which the internet decided to dub a British research vessel "Boaty McBoatface". The boast was given the name {{w|RRS Sir David Attenborough}} in the end, with its Autonomous Underwater Vehicle being called "Boaty McBoatface."

The document also states that naming suggestions may be sent to the email that Randall included in the title text.

This comic was updated in [[1555: Exoplanet Names 2]].

{| class="wikitable"
! Star !! Planet !! Suggested Name !! Explanation
|-
| rowspan=7 | {{w|Gliese 667}} || {{w|Gliese 667 Cb|b}} || Space Planet || A very unoriginal name; every planet is in space.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cc|c}} || PILF || Pun of {{w|MILF pornography|MILF}}, i.e. ''Planet I'd Like to Fuck''. Planet c is a relatively hot planet, within the habitable zone.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cd|d}} || A Star || "A {{w|Star}}" is obviously a bad name for a planet. A* (pronounced "A star") is already used in in astronomy, for example the Milky Way's black hole core is {{w|Sagittarius A*}}. "A star" is also the name for the character {{w|asterisk}} and the name of the popular {{w|A* search algorithm}} in computer science.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Ce|e}} || e'); DROP TABLE PLANETS;-- || A reference to {{w|SQL injection}}, riffing off of [[327|comic 327]], which featured a schoolboy named <code>[[Robert'); DROP TABLE students;--]]</code>. The idea here is that the IAU would enter the name into their system and promptly lose all of their data pertaining to planets. Note that Planet e is located in the habitable zone of the star system.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cf|f}} || Blogosphere || rowspan = 2 | Weird ''{{w|blog}}''-related terms are a recurring theme in xkcd. See, for instance, [[181|comic 181]].
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cg|g}} || Blogodrome
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_667c_h/ h] || Earth || Planet candidate h is about the mass of the Earth, and described as "tantalizing": [http://www.aanda.org/articles/aa/abs/2013/08/aa21331-13/aa21331-13.html A dynamically-packed planetary system around GJ with three super-Earths in its habitable zone]. See also ([[1231: Habitable Zone]]).
|-
| rowspan=5 | {{w|Tau Ceti}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_b/ b] || Sid Meier's Tau Ceti B || This refers to the game {{w|Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri}}.
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_c/ c] || Giant Dog Planet || {{w|VY Canis Majoris}} is one of the largest known stars at our galaxy and belongs to the constellation {{w|Canis Major}}, Latin for "greater dog". The constellation further contains {{w|Sirius}}, the brightest star in the night sky, also called "Dog Star".
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_d/ d] || Tiny Dog Planet || cf. {{w|Canis Minor}}, Latin for "lesser dog", another constellation.
|-
|{{w|Tau Ceti e|e}} || Phil Plainet || A reference to {{w|Phil Plait}}, a.k.a. The Bad Astronomer.
|-
|{{w|Tau Ceti f|f}} || Unicode Snowman || The Unicode character ☃ may be a reference to the planet's estimated surface temperature of -40 °C (-40 °F). However, this name would be pronounced differently (being a symbol, not a word or name) in different languages. Planets in our solar system are assigned to {{w|Astronomical symbols|astronomical symbols}} like ♁ for Earth or ♂ for Mars.
|-
| {{w|Gliese 832}} || {{w|Gliese 832 b|b}} || Asshole Jupiter || This massive planet orbits a {{w|red dwarf}} star at the longest known period of 3416 days at this category.
|-
| rowspan=6 | {{w|Gliese 581}} || {{w|Gliese 581 b|b}} || Waist-deep Cats || {{w|Waist Deep}} is an action film from 2006, and the {{w|Lolcat}} meme does not need explaining. The name may also simply be a reference to being "waist-deep" in (i.e. surrounded by many) cats.
|-
| {{w|Gliese|c}} || Planet #14 || About 200th discovered exoplanet (in 2007); reported to be the first potentially Earth-like planet in the habitable zone of its star, though that is in doubt now. The joke might be that like "Space Planet", "Planet #14" is a generic and unoriginal name. Also note that this is the 15th entry in the table so the numbering is {{w|Zero-based_numbering|zero-based}}.
An interesting (?) coincidence is that the 14th and 15th {{w|Definition of planet#Minor planets|Minor planets}} (then called asteroids) were discovered in 1851; see see {{w|List of minor planets: 1–1000}}. If they were to be counted among the planets of the {{w|Solar System}}, as was sometimes done then, the 14th known planetary body would be {{w| 7 Iris|Iris}} (discovered in 1847, a year before {{w|Neptune}}).
|-
|{{w|Gliese 581 d|d}} || Ballderaan || A {{w|wikt:balls|crude pun}} on the planet {{w|Alderaan}} from the ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' universe.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 581 e|e}} || Eternia Prime || {{w|Eternia}} is a fictional planet, venue of the ''{{w|Masters of the Universe}}'' animated series and toy collection.
|-
| {{w|Gliese 581 f|f}} || Taupe Mars || {{w|Kim Stanley Robinson}}'s award-winning {{w|Mars trilogy}} (''Red Mars, Green Mars, Blue Mars'' after various stages of {{w|terraformation}}). {{w|Taupe}} is a brownish-grey colour.
|-
|{{w|Gliese|g}} || Jelly-Filled Planet || Possibly a reference to the conjecture that this tidally locked planet has an isolated habitable zone under the substellar point, akin to the pocket of jelly in a jelly doughnut.
|-
| rowspan=2 | {{w|Epsilon Eridani}} || {{w|Epsilon Eridani b|b}} || Skydot || [http://skydot.lanl.gov SkyDOT] is the Sky Database for Objects in Time-Domain run by {{w|LANL}} for the {{w|U.S. Dept. of Energy}} and includes data for [http://skydot.lanl.gov/nsvs/star.php?num=14831575&mask=32004 Epsilon Eridani] that can be used to constrain the orbital parameters of ε Eri b. It may also refer to how objects in space may appear as bland, bright dots in the night sky.
|-
| {{w|Epsilon Eridani c#Planet_c|c}} || Laser Noises || A {{w|Laser}} does not produce {{w|Noise (electronics)|noise}} in the signal sense; it only works at a well defined frequency. In science fiction films, however, laser weapon discharges are usually accompanied by sound ("pew pew" or the like). Sun-like Epsilon Eridani became a popular setting for science fiction after its publicity as a target of the {{w|Project Ozma}} experiment.
|-
| rowspan=2 | {{w|Gliese 176}} || {{w|Gliese 176 b|b}} || Pandora || The mythological name {{w|Pandora}} fulfills most of IAU's guidelines and has been popular for planets in science fiction; most recently and famously is {{w|Pandora (Avatar)|the venue}} of James Cameron's ''{{w|Avatar (film)|Avatar}}'' (although actually it is not a planet but just a moon of a gas giant in Alfa Centauri A). It is also a hellish planet from {{w|Frank Herbert}}'s {{w|Frank Herbert bibliography#WorShip novels|WorShip}} series of novels, a jungle planet in Brothers Strugatsky's {{w|Noon Universe}} and the planet used in {{w|Borderlands (video game)|Borderlands Games}}.
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_176_c/ c] || Pantera || Named for the {{w|Pantera|heavy metal band}}, which itself was named after an Italian sports car, the {{w|De Tomaso Pantera}}.
|-
| Kepler-61 || {{w|Kepler-61b|b}} || GoldenPalace.com || A gambling website, known for {{w|GoldenPalace.com|paying to have their name in unusual places}} (like forehead tattoos, species names...).
|-
! colspan=4 | (right column)
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|Upsilon Andromedae}} || {{w|Upsilon Andromedae c|c}} || Stampy || The name of the elephant from the {{w|Simpsons}} episode {{w|Bart Gets an Elephant}}.
|-
|{{w|Upsilon Andromedae d|d}} || Moonchild || The name Bastian gives the Childlike Empress in {{w|The Neverending Story}}.
|-
|{{w|Upsilon Andromedae e|e}} || Ham Sphere || [http://www.hamsphere.com HamSphere] is a {{w|Amateur radio|Ham Radio}} simulator program. Ham radio uses designated radio frequencies for non-commercial exchange of messages and more. A pun of Hemisphere.
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|. Eridani|HD 20794}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_b/ b] || Cosmic Sands || style="font-family:'Comic Sans MS', 'Comic Sans'" | A {{w|pun}} on the name of the font {{w|Comic Sans}}. (See also: [[590|590: Papyrus]].)
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_c/ c] || Legoland || {{w|Legoland}} is a chain of {{w|theme park}}s owned by the {{w|Lego Group}}.
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_d/ d] || Planet with Arms || A reference to the [http://web.archive.org/web/20160119111332/http://www.thecolorsofmysoul.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/The-Hitchhikers-Guide-to-the-Galaxy.jpg early covers] of {{w|Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy}}? Could also be a reference to [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/birds-with-arms "Birds with Arms" meme].
|-
| {{w|HD 85512}} || {{w|HD 85512 b|b}} || Lax Morality || Possibly a parody of science fiction in which certain planets are suggested to be uniformly... lax in morals (i.e. full of sex, drugs, etc.). See http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Planetville and related.
|-
| rowspan=6 | {{w|HD 40307}} || {{w|HD 40307 b|b}} || Good Planet || Similar to the above, except with good planets. May also be yet another non-descriptive name, like "Space Planet" and "Planet #14".
|-
|{{w|HD|c}} || ProblemLand || See above.
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 d|d}} || Slickle || This is a reference to "[http://zdarsky.tumblr.com/post/2837139960 The Petals Fall Twice]", which was made as a humorous example of bad fan-fiction. The word itself is a portmanteau of "slowly", "licked", and "tickled".
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 e|e}} || Spare Parts || This suggests that the planet is "worthless" or "junk". This is false, of course. May be a reference to the fact it is a planet with nothing much different from the other planets.
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 f|f}} || New Jersey VI || Refers to the state of {{w|New Jersey}}; may be an insult to either.
|-
|{{w|HD|g}} || How Do I Join the IAU || This implies that the user "got lost" on the IAU website and thought that the "planet name suggestion" input was for general queries.
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|Gliese 163}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_163_b/ b] || Neil Tyson's Mustache || {{w|Neil deGrasse Tyson}} is a famous American astrophysicist and science communicator who does maintain a distinguished mustache.
|-
|{{w|Gliese|c}} || help@gmail.com || Similar to "How Do I Join the IAU", this implies that the user confused the "planet suggestion" text box for a new email they are trying to send
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_163_d/ d] || Hair-Covered Planet || Refers to the well-known {{w|Hairy ball theorem}} of topology.
|-
| {{w|Pi Mensae}} || {{w|Pi Mensae b|b}} || Moon Holder || {{w|Jupiter}} has more than 60 discovered moons, and still counting... A planet ten times more massive ''must'' also be a Moon Holder.
|-
| {{w|HD 189733}} || {{w|HD 189733 b|b}} || Permadeath || A well-characterized "{{w|Hot Jupiter}}" at a temperature range of 973 ± 33 K to 1,212 ± 11 K. The name refers to the feature of {{w|Permanent death}} common in many RPGs and roguelikes.
|-
| {{w|Kepler-22}} || {{w|Kepler-22 b|b}} || Blue Ivy || Blue Ivy Carter is the daughter of musicians {{w|Beyoncé}} and {{w|Jay-Z}}.
|-
| Kepler-3284 || b || Blainsley || A very small town in the United Kingdom, south of Edinburgh. Possibly chosen due to its insignificance?
|-
| Kepler-3255 || b || Unicorn Thresher || As far as we can tell, Kepler-3255b is in the vicinity of the constellation Monoceros, aka the Unicorn. Also a pun on {{w|Threshing machine|corn thresher}}.
|-
| Kepler-2418 || b || Spherical Discworld || {{w|The Discworld}} is the fictional setting for British author {{w|Terry Pratchett}}'s {{w|Discworld}} series of humorous fantasy novels; it consists of a large disc supported by four elephants themselves standing on top of a turtle flying through space. "Spherical Disc" would be an oxymoron.
|-
| Kepler-1686 || {{w|KOI-1686.01|b}} || Emergency Backup Earth || This candidate planet has an {{w|Earth Similarity Index}} of 0.89, making it one of the most habitable {{w|Kepler object of interest}}. The name suggests that it could be used as a backup in case something happened to our current planet.
|-
| Kepler-3010 || b || Feeeoooooooop || Possibly the onomatopoeia for something getting sucked into a black hole.
|-
| Kepler-4742 || b || Liz || ...Just a regular name (for a person, not a planet). Maybe a reference to the pet lizard on the Magic School Bus.
|}

==Transcript==
:[Text above the first frame of the comic:]
::August 2013:
:The International Astronomical Union
:decides to start naming exoplanets,
:and—for the first time ever—asks for
:suggestions from the general public.
:::They immediately regret this decision.
:[Ponytail is facepalming while Megan and Cueball are looking at a computer screen on a desk. Hairbun points to the screen.]
:Cueball‏‎: Can't you filter out the worst ones?
:Hairbun: This is '''''after''''' the filter!

:[Below is a table showing the list of planet names as seen on the computer screen with gray background around the edges of the table.]

:[The table is in two separate columns, but there is only headings over the left, so the right column is a direct continuation of the left. In the table it is mentioned when the right column begins. There is a small arrow pointing from the word "Planet" down to the second column of the table. The headings in the comic are not inside the table as they are here below. The text at the bottom of the left list seems to continue on below, at least the last entry is cut below the middle, although it is still easy to read. Similarly the text at the top right list, seems to continue from above, the top entry missing the very top of the text. This is as if the list is much longer and here is just shown part of the list. To further indicate this the first entry in the right list begins at "c" instead of at "b" which is else the case for all other instances.]

:{| class="wikitable"
! Star !! Planet !! Suggested Name
|-
| rowspan=7 |Gliese 667||b||Space Planet
|-
|c||PILF
|-
|d||A Star
|-
|e||e'); DROP TABLE PLANETS;--
|-
|f||Blogosphere
|-
|g||Blogodrome
|-
|h||Earth
|-
| rowspan=5 |Tau Ceti||b||Sid Meier's Tau Ceti B
|-
|c||Giant Dog Planet
|-
|d||Tiny Dog Planet
|-
|e||Phil Plainet
|-
|f||Unicode Snowman
|-
|Gliese 832||b||Asshole Jupiter
|-
| rowspan= 6|Gliese 581||b||Waist-deep Cats
|-
|c||Planet #14
|-
|d||Ballderaan
|-
|e||Eternia Prime
|-
|f||Taupe Mars
|-
|g||Jelly-Filled Planet
|-
| rowspan= 2|Epsilon Eridani||b||Skydot
|-
|c||Laser Noises
|-
| rowspan= 2|Gliese 176||b||Pandora
|-
|c||Pantera
|-
|Kepler-61||b||GoldenPalace.com
|-
! colspan=3 | [Below is the right column.]
|-
| rowspan= 3|Upsilon Andromidae||c||Stampy
|-
|d||Moonchild
|-
|e||Ham Sphere
|-
| rowspan= 3|HD 20794||b||Cosmic Sands
|-
|c||Legoland
|-
|d||Planet with Arms
|-
|HD 85512||b||Lax Morality
|-
| rowspan= 6|HD 40307||b||Good Planet
|-
|c||Problemland
|-
|d||Slickle
|-
|e||Spare Parts
|-
|f||New Jersey VI
|-
|g||How Do I Join the IAU
|-
| rowspan= 3|Gliese 163||b||Neil Tyson's Mustache
|-
|c||help@gmail.com
|-
|d||Hair-Covered Planet
|-
|Pi Mensae||b||Moon Holder
|-
|HD 189733||b||Permadeath
|-
|Kepler-22||b||Blue Ivy
|-
|Kepler-3284||b||Blainsley
|-
|Kepler-3255||b||Unicorn Thresher
|-
|Kepler-2418||b||Spherical Discworld
|-
|Kepler-1686||b||Emergency Backup Earth
|-
|Kepler-3010||b||Feeeoooooooop
|-
|Kepler-442||b||Liz
|}

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Exoplanet Names]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Exoplanet Names]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball‏‎]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Little Bobby Tables]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Sex]]
[[Category:Exoplanets]]

1253: Exoplanet Names

2018-01-12T19:25:40Z

172.68.58.23: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1253
| date = August 19, 2013
| title = Exoplanet Names
| image = exoplanet names.png
| titletext = If you have any ideas, I hear you can send them to <nowiki>iaupublic@iap.fr</nowiki>.
}}
==Explanation==
On the 14th August 2013, the {{w|International Astronomical Union}} (IAU) [http://www.iau.org/science/news/179/ issued a document] about public naming of astronomical objects. It stated, "IAU fully supports the involvement of the general public, whether directly or through an independent organized vote, in the naming of planetary satellites, newly discovered planets, and their host stars."

The text above the image states the fact above and then notes that the IAU immediately regret this decision. As we can see from [[Cueball|Cueball's]] question and from [[Ponytail|Ponytail's]] facepalm and the fact that even [[Megan]] is speechless the suggestions are appalling. It becomes even worse when [[Hairbun]] tells them that an automatic filter has already been applied to the results, one designed to remove inappropriate entries that don't meet certain criteria. This implies that the list would have been even worse if presented in its unfiltered form (as seen below in the table).

The naming document also contained, amongst other things, guidelines that suggested names should meet. These include stipulations such as "16 characters or less", "preferably one word", being "pronounceable (in as many languages as possible)", "not too similar to an existing name of an astronomical object", avoiding commercial names, and being "respectful of intellectual property". If we go down the list, we can see that many of [[Randall|Randall's]] suggestions do indeed violate the guidelines. Which is part of the joke as it reflects the tendency of internet submissions to ignore such softly suggested guidelines.

The randomness and inappropriateness of the suggested names reflects the commonly expected response from anonymous submitters on the internet. Many forums and contests that call for online response and do not apply strict control over the responses receive similar collections of random, inappropriate and obscure submissions that are often only tangentially related to the original subject. For example, Greenpeace held a naming contest for one of the whales recently tagged in their research and preservation campaign and even after selecting the finalists the online voting resulted in naming the whale "Mr. Splashypants". PepsiCo had even less restrictive controls in their marketing campaign that asked the internet to name a new flavour of Mountain Dew. They had to shut down the contest in order to avoid naming the new beverage "Hitler did nothing wrong" which was the current leader at the time and only marginally the most inappropriate of the top ten voted suggestions. Even more recently is the case of {{w|Boaty McBoatface}}, in which the internet decided to dub a British research vessel "Boaty McBoatface". The boast was given the name {{w|RRS Sir David Attenborough}} in the end, with its Autonomous Underwater Vehicle being called "Boaty McBoatface."

The document also states that naming suggestions may be sent to the email that Randall included in the title text.

This comic was updated in [[1555: Exoplanet Names 2]].

{| class="wikitable"
! Star !! Planet !! Suggested Name !! Explanation
|-
| rowspan=7 | {{w|Gliese 667}} || {{w|Gliese 667 Cb|b}} || Space Planet || A very unoriginal name; every planet is in space.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cc|c}} || PILF || Pun of {{w|MILF pornography|MILF}}, i.e. ''Planet I'd Like to Fuck''. Planet c is a relatively hot planet, within the habitable zone.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cd|d}} || A Star || "A {{w|Star}}" is obviously a bad name for a planet. A* (pronounced "A star") is already used in in astronomy, for example the Milky Way's black hole core is {{w|Sagittarius A*}}. "A star" is also the name for the character {{w|asterisk}} and the name of the popular {{w|A* search algorithm}} in computer science.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Ce|e}} || e'); DROP TABLE PLANETS;-- || A reference to {{w|SQL injection}}, riffing off of [[327|comic 327]], which featured a schoolboy named <code>[[Robert'); DROP TABLE students;--]]</code>. The idea here is that the IAU would enter the name into their system and promptly lose all of their data pertaining to planets. Note that Planet e is located in the habitable zone of the star system.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cf|f}} || Blogosphere || rowspan = 2 | Weird ''{{w|blog}}''-related terms are a recurring theme in xkcd. See, for instance, [[181|comic 181]].
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cg|g}} || Blogodrome
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_667c_h/ h] || Earth || Planet candidate h is about the mass of the Earth, and described as "tantalizing": [http://www.aanda.org/articles/aa/abs/2013/08/aa21331-13/aa21331-13.html A dynamically-packed planetary system around GJ with three super-Earths in its habitable zone]. See also ([[1231: Habitable Zone]]).
|-
| rowspan=5 | {{w|Tau Ceti}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_b/ b] || Sid Meier's Tau Ceti B || This refers to the game {{w|Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri}}.
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_c/ c] || Giant Dog Planet || {{w|VY Canis Majoris}} is one of the largest known stars at our galaxy and belongs to the constellation {{w|Canis Major}}, Latin for "greater dog". The constellation further contains {{w|Sirius}}, the brightest star in the night sky, also called "Dog Star".
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_d/ d] || Tiny Dog Planet || cf. {{w|Canis Minor}}, Latin for "lesser dog", another constellation.
|-
|{{w|Tau Ceti e|e}} || Phil Plainet || A reference to {{w|Phil Plait}}, a.k.a. The Bad Astronomer.
|-
|{{w|Tau Ceti f|f}} || Unicode Snowman || The Unicode character ☃ may be a reference to the planet's estimated surface temperature of -40 °C (-40 °F). However, this name would be pronounced differently (being a symbol, not a word or name) in different languages. Planets in our solar system are assigned to {{w|Astronomical symbols|astronomical symbols}} like ♁ for Earth or ♂ for Mars.
|-
| {{w|Gliese 832}} || {{w|Gliese 832 b|b}} || Asshole Jupiter || This massive planet orbits a {{w|red dwarf}} star at the longest known period of 3416 days at this category.
|-
| rowspan=6 | {{w|Gliese 581}} || {{w|Gliese 581 b|b}} || Waist-deep Cats || {{w|Waist Deep}} is an action film from 2006, and the {{w|Lolcat}} meme does not need explaining. The name may also simply be a reference to being "waist-deep" in (i.e. surrounded by many) cats.
|-
| {{w|Gliese|c}} || Planet #14 || About 200th discovered exoplanet (in 2007); reported to be the first potentially Earth-like planet in the habitable zone of its star, though that is in doubt now. The joke might be that like "Space Planet", "Planet #14" is a generic and unoriginal name. Also note that this is the 15th entry in the table so the numbering is {{w|Zero-based_numbering|zero-based}}.
An interesting (?) coincidence is that the 14th and 15th {{w|Definition of planet#Minor planets|Minor planets}} (then called asteroids) were discovered in 1851; see see {{w|List of minor planets: 1–1000}}. If they were to be counted among the planets of the {{w|Solar System}}, as was sometimes done then, the 14th known planetary body would be {{w| 7 Iris|Iris}} (discovered in 1847, a year before {{w|Neptune}}).
|-
|{{w|Gliese 581 d|d}} || Ballderaan || A {{w|wikt:balls|crude pun}} on the planet {{w|Alderaan}} from the ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' universe.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 581 e|e}} || Eternia Prime || {{w|Eternia}} is a fictional planet, venue of the ''{{w|Masters of the Universe}}'' animated series and toy collection.
|-
| {{w|Gliese 581 f|f}} || Taupe Mars || {{w|Kim Stanley Robinson}}'s award-winning {{w|Mars trilogy}} (''Red Mars, Green Mars, Blue Mars'' after various stages of {{w|terraformation}}). {{w|Taupe}} is a brownish-grey colour.
|-
|{{w|Gliese|g}} || Jelly-Filled Planet || Possibly a reference to the conjecture that this tidally locked planet has an isolated habitable zone under the substellar point, akin to the pocket of jelly in a jelly doughnut.
|-
| rowspan=2 | {{w|Epsilon Eridani}} || {{w|Epsilon Eridani b|b}} || Skydot || [http://skydot.lanl.gov SkyDOT] is the Sky Database for Objects in Time-Domain run by {{w|LANL}} for the {{w|U.S. Dept. of Energy}} and includes data for [http://skydot.lanl.gov/nsvs/star.php?num=14831575&mask=32004 Epsilon Eridani] that can be used to constrain the orbital parameters of ε Eri b. It may also refer to how objects in space may appear as bland, bright dots in the night sky.
|-
| {{w|Epsilon Eridani c#Planet_c|c}} || Laser Noises || A {{w|Laser}} does not produce {{w|Noise (electronics)|noise}} in the signal sense; it only works at a well defined frequency. In science fiction films, however, laser weapon discharges are usually accompanied by sound. Sun-like Epsilon Eridani became a popular setting for science fiction after its publicity as a target of the {{w|Project Ozma}} experiment.
|-
| rowspan=2 | {{w|Gliese 176}} || {{w|Gliese 176 b|b}} || Pandora || The mythological name {{w|Pandora}} fulfills most of IAU's guidelines and has been popular for planets in science fiction; most recently and famously is {{w|Pandora (Avatar)|the venue}} of James Cameron's ''{{w|Avatar (film)|Avatar}}'' (although actually it is not a planet but just a moon of a gas giant in Alfa Centauri A). It is also a hellish planet from {{w|Frank Herbert}}'s {{w|Frank Herbert bibliography#WorShip novels|WorShip}} series of novels, a jungle planet in Brothers Strugatsky's {{w|Noon Universe}} and the planet used in {{w|Borderlands (video game)|Borderlands Games}}.
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_176_c/ c] || Pantera || Named for the {{w|Pantera|heavy metal band}}, which itself was named after an Italian sports car, the {{w|De Tomaso Pantera}}.
|-
| Kepler-61 || {{w|Kepler-61b|b}} || GoldenPalace.com || A gambling website, known for {{w|GoldenPalace.com|paying to have their name in unusual places}} (like forehead tattoos, species names...).
|-
! colspan=4 | (right column)
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|Upsilon Andromedae}} || {{w|Upsilon Andromedae c|c}} || Stampy || The name of the elephant from the {{w|Simpsons}} episode {{w|Bart Gets an Elephant}}.
|-
|{{w|Upsilon Andromedae d|d}} || Moonchild || The name Bastian gives the Childlike Empress in {{w|The Neverending Story}}.
|-
|{{w|Upsilon Andromedae e|e}} || Ham Sphere || [http://www.hamsphere.com HamSphere] is a {{w|Amateur radio|Ham Radio}} simulator program. Ham radio uses designated radio frequencies for non-commercial exchange of messages and more. A pun of Hemisphere.
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|. Eridani|HD 20794}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_b/ b] || Cosmic Sands || style="font-family:'Comic Sans MS', 'Comic Sans'" | A {{w|pun}} on the name of the font {{w|Comic Sans}}. (See also: [[590|590: Papyrus]].)
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_c/ c] || Legoland || {{w|Legoland}} is a chain of {{w|theme park}}s owned by the {{w|Lego Group}}.
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_d/ d] || Planet with Arms || A reference to the [http://web.archive.org/web/20160119111332/http://www.thecolorsofmysoul.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/The-Hitchhikers-Guide-to-the-Galaxy.jpg early covers] of {{w|Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy}}? Could also be a reference to [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/birds-with-arms "Birds with Arms" meme].
|-
| {{w|HD 85512}} || {{w|HD 85512 b|b}} || Lax Morality || Possibly a parody of science fiction in which certain planets are suggested to be uniformly... lax in morals (i.e. full of sex, drugs, etc.). See http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Planetville and related.
|-
| rowspan=6 | {{w|HD 40307}} || {{w|HD 40307 b|b}} || Good Planet || Similar to the above, except with good planets. May also be yet another non-descriptive name, like "Space Planet" and "Planet #14".
|-
|{{w|HD|c}} || ProblemLand || See above.
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 d|d}} || Slickle || This is a reference to "[http://zdarsky.tumblr.com/post/2837139960 The Petals Fall Twice]", which was made as a humorous example of bad fan-fiction. The word itself is a portmanteau of "slowly", "licked", and "tickled".
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 e|e}} || Spare Parts || This suggests that the planet is "worthless" or "junk". This is false, of course. May be a reference to the fact it is a planet with nothing much different from the other planets.
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 f|f}} || New Jersey VI || Refers to the state of {{w|New Jersey}}; may be an insult to either.
|-
|{{w|HD|g}} || How Do I Join the IAU || This implies that the user "got lost" on the IAU website and thought that the "planet name suggestion" input was for general queries.
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|Gliese 163}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_163_b/ b] || Neil Tyson's Mustache || {{w|Neil deGrasse Tyson}} is a famous American astrophysicist and science communicator who does maintain a distinguished mustache.
|-
|{{w|Gliese|c}} || help@gmail.com || Similar to "How Do I Join the IAU", this implies that the user confused the "planet suggestion" text box for a new email they are trying to send
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_163_d/ d] || Hair-Covered Planet || Refers to the well-known {{w|Hairy ball theorem}} of topology.
|-
| {{w|Pi Mensae}} || {{w|Pi Mensae b|b}} || Moon Holder || {{w|Jupiter}} has more than 60 discovered moons, and still counting... A planet ten times more massive ''must'' also be a Moon Holder.
|-
| {{w|HD 189733}} || {{w|HD 189733 b|b}} || Permadeath || A well-characterized "{{w|Hot Jupiter}}" at a temperature range of 973 ± 33 K to 1,212 ± 11 K. The name refers to the feature of {{w|Permanent death}} common in many RPGs and roguelikes.
|-
| {{w|Kepler-22}} || {{w|Kepler-22 b|b}} || Blue Ivy || Blue Ivy Carter is the daughter of musicians {{w|Beyoncé}} and {{w|Jay-Z}}.
|-
| Kepler-3284 || b || Blainsley || A very small town in the United Kingdom, south of Edinburgh. Possibly chosen due to its insignificance?
|-
| Kepler-3255 || b || Unicorn Thresher || As far as we can tell, Kepler-3255b is in the vicinity of the constellation Monoceros, aka the Unicorn. Also a pun on {{w|Threshing machine|corn thresher}}.
|-
| Kepler-2418 || b || Spherical Discworld || {{w|The Discworld}} is the fictional setting for British author {{w|Terry Pratchett}}'s {{w|Discworld}} series of humorous fantasy novels; it consists of a large disc supported by four elephants themselves standing on top of a turtle flying through space. "Spherical Disc" would be an oxymoron.
|-
| Kepler-1686 || {{w|KOI-1686.01|b}} || Emergency Backup Earth || This candidate planet has an {{w|Earth Similarity Index}} of 0.89, making it one of the most habitable {{w|Kepler object of interest}}. The name suggests that it could be used as a backup in case something happened to our current planet.
|-
| Kepler-3010 || b || Feeeoooooooop || Possibly the onomatopoeia for something getting sucked into a black hole.
|-
| Kepler-4742 || b || Liz || ...Just a regular name (for a person, not a planet). Maybe a reference to the pet lizard on the Magic School Bus.
|}

==Transcript==
:[Text above the first frame of the comic:]
::August 2013:
:The International Astronomical Union
:decides to start naming exoplanets,
:and—for the first time ever—asks for
:suggestions from the general public.
:::They immediately regret this decision.
:[Ponytail is facepalming while Megan and Cueball are looking at a computer screen on a desk. Hairbun points to the screen.]
:Cueball‏‎: Can't you filter out the worst ones?
:Hairbun: This is '''''after''''' the filter!

:[Below is a table showing the list of planet names as seen on the computer screen with gray background around the edges of the table.]

:[The table is in two separate columns, but there is only headings over the left, so the right column is a direct continuation of the left. In the table it is mentioned when the right column begins. There is a small arrow pointing from the word "Planet" down to the second column of the table. The headings in the comic are not inside the table as they are here below. The text at the bottom of the left list seems to continue on below, at least the last entry is cut below the middle, although it is still easy to read. Similarly the text at the top right list, seems to continue from above, the top entry missing the very top of the text. This is as if the list is much longer and here is just shown part of the list. To further indicate this the first entry in the right list begins at "c" instead of at "b" which is else the case for all other instances.]

:{| class="wikitable"
! Star !! Planet !! Suggested Name
|-
| rowspan=7 |Gliese 667||b||Space Planet
|-
|c||PILF
|-
|d||A Star
|-
|e||e'); DROP TABLE PLANETS;--
|-
|f||Blogosphere
|-
|g||Blogodrome
|-
|h||Earth
|-
| rowspan=5 |Tau Ceti||b||Sid Meier's Tau Ceti B
|-
|c||Giant Dog Planet
|-
|d||Tiny Dog Planet
|-
|e||Phil Plainet
|-
|f||Unicode Snowman
|-
|Gliese 832||b||Asshole Jupiter
|-
| rowspan= 6|Gliese 581||b||Waist-deep Cats
|-
|c||Planet #14
|-
|d||Ballderaan
|-
|e||Eternia Prime
|-
|f||Taupe Mars
|-
|g||Jelly-Filled Planet
|-
| rowspan= 2|Epsilon Eridani||b||Skydot
|-
|c||Laser Noises
|-
| rowspan= 2|Gliese 176||b||Pandora
|-
|c||Pantera
|-
|Kepler-61||b||GoldenPalace.com
|-
! colspan=3 | [Below is the right column.]
|-
| rowspan= 3|Upsilon Andromidae||c||Stampy
|-
|d||Moonchild
|-
|e||Ham Sphere
|-
| rowspan= 3|HD 20794||b||Cosmic Sands
|-
|c||Legoland
|-
|d||Planet with Arms
|-
|HD 85512||b||Lax Morality
|-
| rowspan= 6|HD 40307||b||Good Planet
|-
|c||Problemland
|-
|d||Slickle
|-
|e||Spare Parts
|-
|f||New Jersey VI
|-
|g||How Do I Join the IAU
|-
| rowspan= 3|Gliese 163||b||Neil Tyson's Mustache
|-
|c||help@gmail.com
|-
|d||Hair-Covered Planet
|-
|Pi Mensae||b||Moon Holder
|-
|HD 189733||b||Permadeath
|-
|Kepler-22||b||Blue Ivy
|-
|Kepler-3284||b||Blainsley
|-
|Kepler-3255||b||Unicorn Thresher
|-
|Kepler-2418||b||Spherical Discworld
|-
|Kepler-1686||b||Emergency Backup Earth
|-
|Kepler-3010||b||Feeeoooooooop
|-
|Kepler-442||b||Liz
|}

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Exoplanet Names]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Exoplanet Names]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball‏‎]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Little Bobby Tables]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Sex]]
[[Category:Exoplanets]]

1902: State Borders

2017-10-14T14:51:12Z

172.68.58.23: Fix "Tenneesse" in explanation (Minor)

{{comic
| number = 1902
| date = October 13, 2017
| title = State Borders
| image = state_borders.png
| titletext = A schism between the pro-panhandle and anti-panhandle factions eventually led to war, but both sides spent too much time working on their flag designs to actually do much fighting.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Add a table of all the proposed changes. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

In this comic, graphic designers take control of the United States, but the only thing they do is to change the state and national borders, as well as to some extent the coast line, using primarily aesthetic criteria.

Despite the caption's rather blasé reaction to the graphic designers' master plan, the changes they propose could be rather tumultuous. Many U.S. residents will be made to live in new states, and thus be required to pay different taxes and obey different state laws, and even root for different sports teams. Some particularly unlucky U.S. citizens living in Arizona, New Mexico, Alaska, and Minnesota could be required to file for citizenship in Mexico or Canada if they wish to continue living in their current homes. And given that the comic implies that the Trump administration has been ousted by the graphic designer regime, there would probably be no upside to the ensuing international bureaucratic nightmare.

This comic hints at the fact that it is indeed Randall who wants to see these changes made.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Proposed change !! Explanation
|-
| Give to Canada || {{w|Minnesota}} has a small northern exclave (the {{w|Northwest Angle}}) which is accessible from the rest of the US only via the {{w| Lake of the Woods}} or by travelling through Canada. The new borders suggest giving this territory to Canada to simplify the state and national border.
|-
| This should be {{w|Wisconsin}} || {{w|Michigan}} is divided into two parts by {{w|Lake Michigan}}. The graphic designers suggest eliminating a boundary line by assigning the upper peninsula of Michigan to Wisconsin.
|-
| Move Long Island to NJ or CT, or make it its own state || {{w|Connecticut}} and {{w|New Jersey}} are very close to each other but don't actually border, separated only a few miles by {{w|New York State}}. {{w|Long Island}} is part of New York State, which visibly juts out into the Atlantic (extending so far to the east that it gives New York a maritime border with Rhode Island) and apparently drives graphic designers crazy who see an association with New Jersey or Connecticut or even becoming its own state more logical than being a part of New York State. This would have some issues, not least of which is that Long Island contains two of {{w|New York City}}'s five boroughs ({{w|Brooklyn}} and {{w|Queens}}) and more than half the city's population.
|-
| Align to Grid || Most of the Western states are variations on "Let's have a large box", but there's something a bit irregular about them. Never fear, the Design Team has fixed!
|-
| Clean Up (Maryland/Pennsylvania/Virginia/West Virginia) || Maryland's western panhandle and both of West Virginia's to the east and north would be smoothed out to have nice, straight, shorter lines.
|-
|Enlarge Rhode Island & Delaware || {{w|Rhode Island}} and {{w|Delaware}}, the two {{w|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_and_territories_by_area#Area_by_state.2Fterritory|smallest U.S. states by area}}, are often difficult to make out on a map of the United States.
Expanding Delaware to occupy the entire {{w|Delmarva_Peninsula|Delmarva peninsula}} eliminates some boundary lines the designers apparently consider excessively fiddly, as well as solving another "Michigan" problem, as the "VA" of "Delmarva" refers to its {{w|Eastern Shore of Virginia|Eastern Shore}}, which is separated from the rest of Virginia by the mouth of the Chesapeake Bay.

Expanding Rhode Island eastward would reduce the number of land borders it has to two (one to its west with Connecticut and one to its north with Massachusetts) and make it easier to see on a map.
|-
| If we're going to have a panhandle, why not commit to it? || {{w|Oklahoma}} has a "panhandle" to its west, which is a kind of {{w|Salient (geography)|Salient}}. The obvious fix would be to give it to Texas. In a twist, the graphic designers suggest extending it even further, across the northern parts of {{w|Arizona}} and {{w|New Mexico}}. This would make the {{w|Four Corners Monument}} obsolete, since Arizona and New Mexico would no longer border {{w|Utah}} and {{w|Colorado}} respectively, let alone all four states sharing a corner.
|-
| Fix this thing || The border of {{w|Missouri}} cuts into {{w|Arkansas}}, in the so-called {{w|Missouri Bootheel}}. The Design Team has awarded that piece to {{w|Arkansas}}, straightening the border.
|-
| Unlabelled cleanup at the junction of {{w|Kentucky}}/{{w|Virginia}} || Virginia's western border is shifted east to align it with the borders to the north and south, forming a continuous line along the {{w|Appalachian_Mountains|Appalachians}}.
|-
| Unlabelled cleanup at the junction of {{w|Nevada}}/{{w|Arizona}} || Continue the line of Utah's western border and Arizona's far northwestern border south (replacing part of the {{w|Colorado River}} boundary), transferring part of Arizona's {{w|Mohave_County,_Arizona|Mohave county}} to Nevada.
|-
| Unlabelled cleanup at the junction of {{w|Texas}}/{{w|Oklahoma}}/{{w|Arkansas}}/{{w|Louisiana}} || Square off {{w|Southwest Arkansas}}, and move {{w|Lousiana's}} northwest border to meet up, presumably because square corners are better.
|-
| Clean up (Arizona/New Mexico/Texas) || One of {{w|New Mexico}}'s borders should be extended into a single line. This results in ceding some land to Mexico, having {{w|El Paso}} split across New Mexico and Texas, and Highway 62 alternating between two states.
|-
| Straighten to fix survey errors (Tennessee) || {{w|Tennessee}}'s southern border is supposed to be the 35th parallel north, but due to surveying errors made in the 19th Century the marked border is one mile south of that line. At many times since, Georgia has sought to fix this by various means (at least partly because doing so would net them some rights to the water from the Tennessee River) including bringing its case to the US Supreme Court - with the Design Team in charge, they wouldn't need those lawyers any more. Farther westward, Tennessee's actual southern border suddenly juts south at the Tennessee River between Alabama and Mississippi - again, the Design Team would rather see it smoothed out. Tennessee's northern border with Kentucky has similar hitches that prevent it from being a straight line that the Design Team wants to address.
|-
| Good Curve! Keep (Florida/Georgia/South Carolina) || The only thing the design team likes already about the shape of the US is the shape of the Atlantic coast in northern {{w|Florida}}, Georgia, and {{w|South Carolina}}, as it seems to bend into the US smoothly. Given the curve is the border between land and water, it's good they like it as changing it would be very difficult and expensive.
|-
| Let's be honest, this should be Canada too || {{w|Southeast Alaska}} should be given to {{w|Canada}}, presumably because it more neatly fits with {{w|British Columbia}}. This is slightly problematic, as the state capital, {{w|Juneau}}, is within this section.
|-
| Why should Florida get Alabama's coastline? It has plenty. ||
The {{w|Florida Panhandle}} borders southern {{w|Alabama}} denying the state all but a sliver of coastline. Given that Florida already has an abundance of coast, the Graphic Designers consider the present arrangement unfair. Ceding the Florida counties west of the {{w|Apalachicola River}} has actually been {{w|Florida_Panhandle#Alabama_annexation_proposals|raised since the 19th century}}. This change would have the additional benfit of more neatly aligning Florida's western border with that of neighboring {{w|Georgia (U.S. state)|Georgia}}.
|}

In the title text, the graphic designers have a civil war between the ones that favor "panhandles" in the borders, such as the Oklahoma one which is enlarged in the map, the Florida one which is removed in the map, and maybe others such as the Texas region known as the "Texas panhandle". However, as graphic designers, they get too caught up in making the flag designs for their faction to actually fight. Randall has shown interest for vexillology (the study of flags) in the past.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
:[An outline map of the United States is shown, including state boundaries. The following edit marks are shown in red text:]
:[Minnesota's Northwest Angle is circled] Give to Canada
:[Border between Wisconsin and Michigan's Upper Peninsula is crossed out] This should be Wisconsin
:[New York's Long Island is circled, with arrows and question marks pointing to New Jersey and Connecticut] Move Long Island to NJ or CT or make it its own state
:[New York's eastern border has been straightened]
:[Wyoming's western border is moved to align with that of Colorado. The Montana/Idaho and Idaho/Utah borders are extended to reach the new border. Similarly, Colorado's eastern border is moved to align with that of Wyoming, and the Nebraska/Kansas border has been extended] Align to grid
:[West Virginia's northern panhandle has been given to Ohio and part of its eastern panhandle has been given to Maryland. In return, Western Maryland has been given to West Virginia. The altogether effect is that West Virginia and Maryland have more compact shapes] Clean Up
:[Rhode Island has been enlarged to encompass southeastern Massachusetts, and Delaware now takes up the entire Delmarva Peninsula] Enlarge Rhode Island & Delaware
:[The Oklahoma Panhandle has been extended west until it reaches Nevada, taking the northernmost parts of Arizona and New Mexico with it] If we're going to have a panhandle, why not commit to it?
:[The Missouri Bootheel has been given to Arkansas] Fix this thing
:[The part of Virginia west of the Appalachian Mountains has been given to Kentucky]
:[The southwestern and eastern borders of Nevada have been extended into Arizona until they meet a point. A part of California is slightly extended to reach the revised border]
:[Parts of Arizona and New Mexico have been ceded to Mexico, and part of Texas has been given to New Mexico, so that the southern borders of Arizona and New Mexico and the northern border of the Trans-Pecos area of Texas collectively form a straight line] Clean Up
:[Parts of northeastern Texas have been given to Arkansas and Louisiana]
:[The northern and southern borders of Tennessee have been straightened] Straighten to fix survey errors
:[A line has been traced along the coasts of South Carolina, Georgia, and northern Florida] Good curve! Keep.
:[Alaska's southeastern panhandle has been circled] Let's be honest - this should be Canada, too.
:[The Alabama/Florida border has been erased, and Alabama's eastern border has been extended south until it meets the Gulf of Mexico] Why should Florida get Alabama's coastline? It has plenty.

:[Caption below the panel:]
:It was scary when graphic designers seized control of the country, but it turned out they just wanted to fix some things about the state borders that had always bothered them. 

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Maps]]

Talk:1897: Self Driving

2017-10-02T19:54:14Z

172.68.58.23:

I think this is more a reference to various projects (like the ReCAPTCHA that protects this site) that use CAPTCHAs to digitise text and so on, by involuntarily crowdsourcing the typing out of the text by users trying to complete a login, rather than specifically about bots trying to circumvent anti-bot protection. It also brings to mind things like the Zooniverse projects, where volunteers contribute to the classification of astronomical bodies, identification of animals in game reserves, and so on, in that a computer is able to make a rough guess as to what the image is, but it takes a human intervention to make a reliable (and therefore useful) identification. Similarly, Google's (now discontinued) Picasa software had a 'People' function where it would attempt to guess who the people in your photos were - yet it would make so many false identifications, and make you go through saying 'Yes/No' to each of them, that it often felt as though you might just as well have classified them all yourself in the first place.[[Special:Contributions/162.158.155.32|162.158.155.32]] 10:33, 2 October 2017 (UTC)

The comic clearly references techniques like reCAPTCHA that trick (1) unsuspecting people into doing the real work for free while they think they are solving a captcha, and (2) users of the final product who think it was created by an AI (or at least an OCR) when it was done "by hand". The comic is neither about teaching AIs, nor voluntary collaborative projects.
Zetfr 11:42, 2 October 2017 (UTC)

:I think the comic is about the borderlands between knowingly volunteering your time and unknowlingly supplying an AI with valuable information. When reading the caption my first thought was Google Translate, where the gamification / voluntary work is based on the texts submitted by a lot of unsuspecting users. When voluntarily contributing to the AI, I've been presented with some poor bloke's chat log, and another person's travel plans. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.134.100|162.158.134.100]] 12:11, 2 October 2017 (UTC)

From what I have read, some image recognition AI projects use human input to refine their algorithms. Many AI algorithms also give probabilities of the correctness of the results. So in the domain of image recognition for self-driving cars it is conceivable that the computer would request human input to verify the interpretation of the scene. The comic is considering this possibility in a context that pokes fun at the field of AI in a rather scary real-world situation. [[User:Rtanenbaum|Rtanenbaum]] ([[User talk:Rtanenbaum|talk]]) 13:31, 2 October 2017 (UTC)

"From the creators of "Twitch Plays Pokemon" comes an all new reality series that'll blow you away! "Twitch Taxi!" Coming this Fall!" [[Special:Contributions/162.158.62.153|162.158.62.153]] 13:38, 2 October 2017 (UTC)

It seems to me the person viewing the image and registering some product is not an occupent of the "self driving" car being referred to in the comic. Rather, the self driving car (possibly containing passengers) is dependent on some random stranger on the Internet responding (correctly) to the question about the stop sign. Maybe this is obvious but when I first glanced at the comic, my interpretation was the occupants of the vehicle were being asked for the information. But after thinking about it a bit, I believe that any passengers in the car are blissfully unaware of their situation, likely assuming the car doesn't depend on input from someone in the next 5 seconds or so. Not really sure how to word all this in the explanation. But it seems like a business model Black Hat would employ. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.58.23|172.68.58.23]] 19:54, 2 October 2017 (UTC)Pat

Talk:1824: Identification Chart

2017-04-18T04:41:46Z

172.68.58.23:

Birdwatchers have a technique for identifying birds by silhouette called Giss (pronounced Jizz) it stands for General Impression, size, and shape
During WWI-II peacetime birdwatchers used the same technique to spot and call or planes. Think it could be a reference to that?
4/17/2017


Hi, I have partially added a table, can someone who is better at tables fill it in? Thanks.[[User:Dontknow|Dontknow]] ([[User talk:Dontknow|talk]]) 04:42, 14 April 2017 (UTC)

I was in Cambridge last week and an Osprey cruised overhead at a very low altitude. Was seriously cool to see. Randall lives nearby. Perhaps that's what inspired this comic? [[Special:Contributions/162.158.75.94|162.158.75.94]] 06:43, 14 April 2017 (UTC)

When I saw "Hawk" I thought of a Cessna 172 Skyhawk. [[User:RChandra|RChandra]] ([[User talk:RChandra|talk]]) 10:54, 14 April 2017 (UTC)
:That could also be referencing the A-4 Skyhawk (chart updated) [[Special:Contributions/172.68.65.138|172.68.65.138]]

Corrected some spellings and made the English a bit more idiomatic. Hypersonic is usually considered Mach 5 and higher, so altered that as the SR71 was fast but not that fast. Added reference to the Hawker Sea Hawk to the Hawk discussion, but the silhouette is clearly a BAe Hawk (tailplanes different shape from A4 Skyhawk or Hawker Sea Hawk, and a jet unlike the Cessna).

[F-15]: "other jets like F-16 have filled its role. The U.S. Air National Guard is the largest operator as of now." The F-15 is a current, front-line fighter. Only older models are in the ANG.

[F-16]: "A smaller, more versatile fighter jet." Just smaller.

Could this comic be a continuation of where Randall believes we are heading? The direction of our country, and the world? It seems a warning.

Reminds me of a how Navajo code talkers used the names of birds in place of different aircraft (eg, the Navajo word for "hummingbird" was code for "fighter plane").[[Special:Contributions/108.162.237.178|108.162.237.178]] 15:00, 14 April 2017 (UTC)

Should we reference this XKCD/What-If page, which has a similar drawing: https://what-if.xkcd.com/149/

Actually, that was comparing actual birds with a plane thrown in for humour. This is different. [[User:Dontknow|Dontknow]] ([[User talk:Dontknow|talk]]) 23:44, 17 April 2017 (UTC)

== Real images of birds (and an insect) and aircrafts ==

Real silhouette of an V-22 Osprey aircraft: [[File:bell-boeing-v-22-osprey-3-silhouette.png|200px|thumb|baselinev]] --[[User:JakubNarebski|JakubNarebski]] ([[User talk:JakubNarebski|talk]]) 19:48, 16 April 2017 (UTC)