explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1645: Toasts

2021-04-30T18:08:03Z

173.245.52.97: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 1645
| date = February 19, 2016
| title = Toasts
| image = toasts.png
| titletext = Platonic solids for my real friends and real solids for my platonic friends!
}}

==Explanation==
A {{w|Toast (honor)|toast}} is a ritual in which a drink is taken as an expression of honor or goodwill. The term may be applied to the person or thing so honored, the drink taken, or the verbal expression accompanying the drink. Thus, a person could be "the toast of the evening," for whom someone "proposes a toast" to congratulate and for whom a third person "toasts" in agreement.

The comic is based on the quote {{w|Champagne for My Real Friends, Real Pain for My Sham Friends}} which, though often attributed to the painter {{w|Francis Bacon (artist)|Francis Bacon}} or to {{w|Tom Waits}}, is a toast dating back to at least the nineteenth century. It is also the entire title of a [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7q9i6KYmzQ song], the {{w|From_Under_the_Cork_Tree#Track_listing|ninth track}} on {{w|From Under the Cork Tree}}, a 2005 album by {{w|Fall Out Boy}}.

The comic plays on a permutation structure between two words (a type of {{w|chiasmus}}), yielding puns with various effects. In this comic eight persons drink a '''toast''' for their "real friends" and then for some other type of "friends". For the real friend they wish them to have one specific thing. This something is a word (X-Y) that can be split up in two meanings (X and Y), where one of them are then put in front the word friend, to explain what type of friends they are now toasting (often a bad/false type of friend) and then these friends get a wish for having what the word that are left of the original word means: "X-Y for my real friends and real Y for my X friends"

The first example is a typical toast, in Champagne, where this word can be split in the two phonetically similar words Sham and Pain, and the sham friends then get pain. [[#The toasts|Below]] all examples (including the ninth from the title text) are listed with explanation for all words. In some cases the word may actually refer to a drink (like the first with champagne), so that the first word is not something wished for the real friends, but the drink that is in the glass (these have been mentioned below). But for other toasts there is no such drink in existence, and the first word is the thing the toaster wishes for the real friends.

===The toasts===
*''Champagne'' sounds like a combination of the two words ''sham'' and ''pain''.
**{{w|Champagne}} is an expensive sparkling wine.
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/sham Sham] means false.
**{{w|Pain}} is not so nice to hand out.{{Citation needed}}
***So [[Cueball]] toast his real friends with Champagne and wishes real pain to his false friends.
*''Pseudopods'' can be divided into ''pseudo-'' and ''pods''.
**{{w|Pseudopods}} (which translate to "false feet") are temporary cytoplasm-filled parts of the cell wall that are able to change their form in order to move. They are used in some eukaryotic cells to move around or to eat. Most cells that do this are called {{w|Amoeba|amoeboids}}. The {{w|Amoeba (genus)|amoeba}} is a common example. There is no drink named Pseudopods!
**{{w|Pseudo-}} (lying, false) is used to mark something that superficially appears to be (or behaves like) one thing, but actually is another.
**{{w|Pods}} or {{w|pod}} is not clearly defined. It could refer to {{w|Glossary_of_plant_morphology#Fruit_types|seedpod}} – a dry dehiscent fruit containing many seeds. Pods, both malevolent and benignant, appear in many works of SF and Fantasy.
***So [[Blondie]] will give her real friends a special part/adaptation of the amoeba. (Doesn't everyone wish they had pseudopods?) But it at least seems better than her pseudo-friends who would receive real pods with intricate ways to kill them.
*''Petticoats'' sounds like a combination of the two words ''petty'' and ''coats''
**A {{w|petticoat}} or underskirt is an article of clothing; specifically an undergarment to be worn under a skirt or a dress. There is no drink named petticoats!
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/petty Petty] means small (in rank of importance), insignificant or narrow-minded. See for instance {{w|petty crime}}.
**A {{w|Coat (clothing)|coat}} is a garment worn by both men and women, for warmth or fashion.{{Citation needed}}
***So [[Megan]] will hand out undergarments for her real friends (a very personal gift) and coats for her less important/insignificant or narrow-minded friends (they seem to be the luckier ones here).
*''Loosestrife'' can be divided into ''loose'' and ''strife''.
**{{w|Loosestrife}} is a common name for plants within two different genera (which are not related): {{w|Lythrum}} (example: {{w|Lythrum salicaria|purple loosestrife}}) and {{w|Lysimachia}} (example: {{w|Lysimachia ciliata|Fringed Loosestrife}}). There is a patent for a [http://www.google.com.na/patents/CN1154814A?cl=en loosestrife drink] but it seems unlikely that this is in the glass.
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/loose Loose] in this case means free from restraints, as the opposite of {{w|close friend}}. Loose can also refer to being sexually promiscuous, especially when used as an adjective for people.
**[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/strife Strife] refers to bitter, sometimes violent, conflict or discord.
***So the "brunette" woman (i.e. similar hair but less dark than Megan) will give her real friends flowers and for her promiscuous friend she wishes they end up in a real violent conflict.
*''Ladybugs'' can be divided into ''lady'' and ''bugs''.
**{{w|Ladybugs}} (or Ladybird) are a family of insects common all over the world. They are [http://photobucket.com/images/cute%20ladybug considered cute]. There also exists a recipe for a [http://www.1001cocktails.com/recipes/mixed-drinks/104741/cocktail-ladybug.html ''ladybug'' cocktail].
**{{w|Lady}} is a civil term of respect for a woman, specifically the female equivalent to {{w|gentleman}} or {{w|lord}}, but in many contexts a term for any adult woman.
**{{w|Bugs}} in this case refer to {{w|insects}} or {{w|arachnids}}. It could also refer to the scientific classification {{w|Hemiptera}}, the "true bugs", which does not include ladybugs.
***[[Hairbun]] toasts her real friends in the ''ladybug'' cocktail - it could be a cocktail glass she is holding - (rather than giving the ladybugs for her real friends, even though they are [http://www.zazzle.com/cute+ladybug cute bugs] that most people are not afraid of). And then she will bestow real bugs ({{w|beetles}}, {{w|flies}} or {{w|spiders}}) to her lady friends. This is not necessarily all her female friends, it could be only those that are {{w|Lady#British_nobility|noble}} or at least think they are more important and thus would like to be called lady.
*''Single-payer'' can be divided into ''single,'' and payer, a word that rhymes with ''player''. In this case this word is then put together with real to form the word ''RealPlayer''.
**{{w|Single-payer}} refers to single-payer healthcare, a system in which the state, rather than private insurers, pays for all {{w|healthcare}} costs, a system used in several countries, but not so far in the US; it was initially considered but ultimately rejected when the {{w|Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act}}, also referred to as {{w|Obamacare}} by both detractors and supporters of the law, was discussed, passed by the US House and Senate, and signed into law by President {{w|Barack Obama}}. There is no drink named single-payer!
**{{w|Single person|Single}} refers to a person who is not in a relationship or is unmarried.
**{{w|RealPlayer}} is a cross-platform media player app, developed by RealNetworks. It is compatible with numerous container file formats of the multimedia realm. In the past it has been {{w|RealPlayer#Reviews_and_critiques|criticized}} for containing adware and spyware. This was back from 1999 and up to the 2004 version.
**It is specifically '''not''' the word ''{{w|Single-player video game|single-player}}'' that is used! This word could refer to video games that only one player can play at a time, or when choosing to play single-player in a game where more could have played. ''RealPayer'' is '''not''' a word in use.
***[[White Hat]] thus wishes that his real friends have access to state-funded health care, and all his single friends will get RealPlayer. Since [[White Hat]] is normally benevolent, if naïve, he may imagine that RealPlayer will help his single friends enjoy Internet media, when they are home alone. Maybe he wishes to impress these singles with a free app as a present in the hope that he {{w|Get Lucky (Daft Punk song)|gets lucky}}. If it has been [[Hairy]] this would have seemed very likely… see [[1178: Pickup Artists]]. White Hat has not previously displayed these tendencies too clearly. As mentioned there have been some issues with RealPlayer in the past, but it has stayed on the market for more than a decade. However, since it has {{w|RealPlayer#Current_Status|recently been changed}} into ''RealTimes'' it may not be so cool a gift anyway. Also White Hat might wish to give away the old spy ware version of RealPlayer. But as opposed to most of the special type of friends, ''single-friends'' is not in itself a negative type of friend, especially not if you are yourself single. So no direct reason to make bad wished for single friends as opposed to sham friends.
*''Tumbleweeds'' sounds like a combination of the two words ''tumblr'' and ''weed''.
**{{w|Tumbleweed}} is a structural part of the above-ground anatomy of a number of species of plants, a {{w|Diaspore (botany)|diaspore}} (of seeds) that, once it is mature and dry, detaches from its root or stem, and tumbles away in the wind. The tumbleweed's {{w|Tumbleweed#Symbolism|association}} with the Western film genre has led to a highly symbolic meaning in visual media. But there is also a [http://www.idrink.com/v.html?id=33698 ''Tumbleweed'' cocktail].
**{{w|tumblr}} is a microblogging platform and social networking website
**A {{w|weed}} is any plant considered undesirable in a particular situation, but in this case it refers to {{w|Cannabis (drug)|Cannabis}}, also known as marijuana and by many other names (including weed), and would be used (again in this comic) as a {{w|psychoactive drug}}, i.e. to {{w|getting high|get high}}.
***[[Ponytail]] toast her real friends in the ''Tumbleweed'' cocktail (rather than giving them a western movie symbol, that will spread seeds all over their house), but with her friends on her favorite blogsite ''tumblr'' she will share her expensive weed.
*''Fauxhawks'' can be divided into ''faux'' and ''hawks''
**{{w|Mohawk_hairstyle#Fauxhawk_variants |Fauxhawks}} copies the style of a {{w|Mohawk hairstyle}}, but without shaving the sides of the head and not extending past the peak of the cranium. But there is also a [https://untappd.com/b/starving-artist-brewing-co-fauxhawks/1105627 ''Fauxhawks'' beer].
**{{w|Faux}} is a French word for "false".
**{{w|Hawks}} is a common name for some small to medium-sized diurnal birds of prey, widely distributed and varying greatly in size.
***[[Beret Guy]] thus wishes to cut his real friends hair in a very special way, maybe to his liking and thought of as a favor, but not necessarily liked by all his friends, cause although Beret Guy is weird, it seems that those around him are not. His false friends can have a predatory bird (maybe coming after them), but rather knowing Beret Guys love of all things, just as a present of something he likes, like animals. Alternatively he toast in the beer with that name - could be a fancy beer glass he is holding.
*'''Title text:'''
*''Platonic solids'' can be divided into ''platonic'' and ''solids''
**{{w|Platonic solids}}: In three-dimensional space, a platonic solid is a regular, convex polyhedron. It is constructed by congruent regular polygonal faces with the same number of faces meeting at each vertex. Five solids meet those criteria, and each is named after its number of faces: Tetrahedron (a.k.a. "Regular triangle-based pyramid"), Hexahedron ("Cube"), Octahedron (can be considered the union of two square-based pyramids, base-to-base), Dodecahedron and Icosahedron. There is no drink named platonic solids!
**[https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/platonic Platonic] means ''not sexual in nature'' as in {{w|platonic love}}, which is a type of love that is celibate and non-sexual. Platonic friends are friends who will never have sex with each other.
**{{w|Solid}} is one of the three fundamental states of matter (the others being liquid and gas). ''Doing someone a solid'' can also mean ''doing someone a favor''
***[[Randall]], must be speaking the title text and he wishes his real friends to have material in regular, convex polyhedron shape where as his {{w|platonic friends}} can get any other kind of solid material, alternatively a solid favor. Platonic friends are not necessarily bad to have so maybe it should be a positive toast for those as well. On the other hand, sometimes it is one friend that has decided it should be a platonic friendship. In this case the other may regret this and not wish good things for this friend.
***'''Solids'' can also refer to solid human excrement.
**''Platonic'' can also refer to {{w|Platonic ideal}}s, which are models that real-life objects and processes implement only imperfectly.
***So while Randall wants his Platonic friends to have solid objects in the imperfect shapes that can exist in real life, he wants his "real friends" to have impossibly perfect hard copies of the regular tetrahedron, cube, octahedron, dodecahedron and icosahedron.

==Transcript==
:[There are two rows of 4 panels each. Each panel shows a different person offering a toast. Each one has some kind of drink in one hand which they hold up.]

:[First row panels:]
:[Cueball holding up a wine glass to the right:]
:Cueball: Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends!

:[Blondie holding up a regular glass to the left:]
:Blondie: Pseudopods for my real friends and real pods for my pseudo-friends!

:[Megan holding up a drinks glass to the right:]
:Megan: Petticoats for my real friends and real coats for my petty friends.

:[A "brunette" woman (i.e. similar hair but less dark than Megan) holding up a normal glass with a small umbrella in it to the right:]
:Brunette woman: Loosestrife for my real friends and real strife for my loose friends!

:[Second row panels:]
:[Hairbun holding up a wine glass to the left:]
:Hairbun: Ladybugs for my real friends and real bugs for my lady friends!

:[White Hat holding up a regular glass to the right:]
:White Hat: Single-payer for my real friends and RealPlayer for my single friends.

:[Ponytail holding up a regular glass to the right:]
:Ponytail: Tumbleweeds for my real friends and real weed for my Tumblr friends!

:[Beret Guy holding up a wine glass to the left:]
:Beret Guy: Fauxhawks for my real friends and real hawks for my faux friends!

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Blondie]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Social networking]]

2177: Gastroenterology

2021-04-17T18:35:30Z

173.245.52.97: /* Explanation */ Removed both "Citation needed" jokes. Neither of them were funny, and neither of them were on facts that would be obvious to everyone. This joke is meant for things like "the ocean has a lot of water," not the properties of antimatter.

{{comic
| number = 2177
| date = July 17, 2019
| title = Gastroenterology
| image = gastroenterology.png
| titletext = "Mostly it means that I'm acutely aware that the kid one table over coughed as the server walked past with our food."
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Gastroenterology}} is the study of the normal function and diseases of the digestive system: esophagus, stomach, small intestine, colon and rectum, pancreas, gallbladder, bile ducts and liver.

{{w|Antibiotics}} are substances that kill bacteria. They are effective at treating bacterial infections, including in the gut; unfortunately, they can also kill the normal gut bacteria. {{w|Probiotics}} are harmless or helpful bacteria which are sometimes used to replace the bacteria killed by an antibiotic. This reduces chances of re-infection by pathogens, and allows the natural gut microbiome to recover more effectively; [[1471|comic 1471]] was about the same theme. Probiotics are included in many foods, such as yogurt, as well as supplements, and are marketed as having health benefits.

The comic plays on the names probiotic and antibiotic. When {{w|matter}} and {{w|antimatter}} are mixed, they {{w|annihilation|annihilate}} each-other, rapidly releasing energy (an explosion).
This comic imagines a similar process when probiotics and antibiotics are mixed: Ponytail and a nurse runs into a room, with someone chasing after them, leading the nurse to exclaim that “they’re right behind us.” Ponytail mixes the probiotics and antibiotics, and throws the jar like a grenade, before continuing to run with the nurse. The reaction between the probiotics and antibiotics causes the jar to explode presumably killing the pursuer. In reality, antibiotics and probiotics are often used simultaneously during treatment, but they are taken so that they do not mix (taken at different times or by different methods). Mixing them as in the comic, would just cause the antibiotic to kill the probiotic bacteria. Explosive reactions between antibiotics and probiotics are highly unlikely.

Matter and antimatter would react pretty much instantly upon mixing, not a short time later, as in the comic. (Also, one could not keep antimatter in a normal jar, or pour it in an atmosphere). The reaction shown is similar to the reaction between a strong acid and a strong base, which could cause an explosion after a short delay if kept in a tightly sealed container like a water bottle, as in the explosion here.

In the last panel, Ponytail is giving a more mundane summary of what gastroenterology is like (lots of paperwork). This is similar to Indiana Jones saying that archaeology is boring. The explosion sequence might be:
* Ponytail's action fantasy of what the job could be.
* Megan's fantasy, and Ponytail is telling her what it is actually like.
* Real, and Ponytail is covering it up.

In the title text, Ponytail adds that her work makes her aware of a child coughing as the server was bringing food at the restaurant table, exposing the food to possible germs that could cause a gastrointestinal infection.

==Transcript==
:[The first five panels appear in a single row.]
:[Ponytail, wearing a lab coat, and a guy wearing a scrubs hat rush in from the right side of the panel. Ponytail is holding a water bottle. There is a desk on the left of the panel with two jars.]
:Hat guy: Hurry, they're right behind us!

:[Zoom in on Ponytail, behind the desk, pouring the two smaller jars into the water bottle.]
:An arrow points to the left jar: Probiotic
:An arrow points to the right jar: Antibiotic

:[A borderless panel. Zoom out on Ponytail shaking the water bottle to mix the two substances.]
:Shake Shake Shake

:[Ponytail throws the water bottle toward the right side of the panel, at something off-screen.]

:[Hat guy and Ponytail run toward the left side of the panel, as the water bottle explodes.]
:BOOM

:[The last panel is the only panel in its row, appearing at the far right end of the row and slightly narrower than the fifth panel above it.]
:[Megan and Ponytail sitting at a table, facing each other, having a meal.]
:Megan: So what's gastroenterology like?
:Ponytail: Pretty boring. Lotta paperwork.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Biology]]
[[Category:Physics]]

Talk:1285: Third Way

2020-12-01T19:12:45Z

173.245.52.97:

I'm wondering if the title text refers to the habbit many people have of slamming on their space key creating a very load sound- hence you can hear the difference between one space and two. But I'm not confident enough to edit the page [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.97|173.245.52.97]] 19:12, 1 December 2020 (UTC)

One line per sentence is reminiscent of a diagrammed/formal logic argument in philosophy. It would be a much more effective convention to help people parse and interpret content and validity of e.g. political claims. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.63.198|173.245.63.198]] 17:21, 2 November 2013 (UTC)

Line break after every sentence. 
Because I can. 
[[Special:Contributions/108.162.245.7|108.162.245.7]] 04:41, 20 February 2014 (UTC)

ONE AFTER A PERIOD. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 04:38, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:MY VOTE TOO!!! --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 18:36, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:MY VOTE, TWO!!! (not really) [[User:Orazor|Orazor]] ([[User talk:Orazor|talk]]) 09:20, 1 October 2014 (UTC)

Writing plaintext, I always do two s after a sentence ending period.
This is probably because I did in fact start typing on a real typewriter.
In an environment where automatic formatting will take place, like a web page or wiki text, I use the newline.
I have had people in this wiki collapse my multiple line forms to one of the others.
(I was disappointed.)
--[[User:Divad27182|Divad27182]] ([[User talk:Divad27182|talk]]) 04:48, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

I prefer double spacing, but I used single spacing in writing the explanation, just to make people happy. Perhaps I should have used new lines. [[User:Concomitant|Concomitant]] ([[User talk:Concomitant|talk]]) 05:10, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
: I'm a double-spacer too. Am I wrong? I can't break myself of the habit, I even do it in s! --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 16:43, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

The 'third way' is a little underappreciated here: it divides the text into self contained logical units, and makes text processing tools (grep, diff etc.) much more usable.
Proper text rendering engines (TeX, HTML, etc.) already make this assumption and group sentences accordingly.
If only I realized this earlier, it would have made my thesis revisions much more easier.
In fact, up to this moment, I thought I was that lone guy in the comic.
EDIT: this comment in xkcd forums makes my point clear: http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=106217#p3489055
--[[Special:Contributions/141.101.96.11|141.101.96.11]] 05:42, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

:As a programmer, I find nothing weird in adapting your style to language. Writing two s in HTML or TeX is useless, as they won't render as two s anyway. (While using for this purpose nonbreakable s, which would render, is a crime.) -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:48, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
::It would also render incorrectly if the period was close to the end of a line. If the markup is [last word of sentence][period][nbsp][][next sentence], the last word of the first sentence could end up on the next line unnecessarily. But if it's [last word of sentence][period][][nbsp][next sentence], the next line of text would start with a , which is much worse.--[[User:Rael|Rael]] ([[User talk:Rael|talk]]) 15:16, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

::I end my sentences with a line break, a % and another linebreak. Only after commata etc i use a single line break. Oh, and don't forget to protect the after points used in abbreviations, not as full stops, by a backslash. Most TeX increase the length of the after a full stop a bit. Bit question: Why don't double people, when using Word not just use a longer instead of a double . Noone would have the idea to indent a paragraph or substitute a tab with a series of s.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.242.117|108.162.242.117]] 03:11, 2 November 2013 (UTC)
:::Because the does not contain a longer key.--[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.188|173.245.52.188]] 18:13, 4 November 2013 (UTC)

I always just find and replace double with single . If formatting suffers, someone did a bad job.[[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.228|108.162.231.228]] 06:33, 1 November 2013 (UTC) Synthetica

I always just find and replace single with double . If formatting suffers, someone did a bad job.--[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.188|173.245.52.188]] 18:13, 4 November 2013 (UTC)

So, why did double spacing after a period ever exist? It doesn't seem necessary. [[User:PheagleAdler|PheagleAdler]] ([[User talk:PheagleAdler|talk]]) 07:31, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:Here's the standard explanation: on typewriters, each character takes up the same amount of . So a lower-case "i" takes up the same amount of as a capital "M". This is called a monospace font. When typing, if you just put a single after the end of period ending a sentence, the reader doesn't necessarily get the sense that a new sentence has started. This is particularly true if you were typing in all caps, as might be common on some types of forms or documents. Two s, however, does the job nicely. In theory, with modern proportional-width fonts, this is unnecessary. [[User:Rylon|Rylon]] ([[User talk:Rylon|talk]]) 23:36, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
::Here's the researched explanation: http://www.heracliteanriver.com/?p=324 So technically, an em- after a period, an en- after a comma. Or you know, whatever you want. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.250.161|108.162.250.161]] 06:22, 17 July 2015 (UTC)

even though i learned typing on a typewriter, to this day i had never heard of the double thing. maybe it's a US only thing, like the stupid french with s BEFORE punctuation marks. [[User:Peter|Peter]] ([[User talk:Peter|talk]]) 07:54, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:I've always taken the double- thing as a US thing. Some editors like emacs default to it, which is really annoying. That said, as a frenchman, the " before punctuation" is normal to me and it is part of the ''codified'' typography -- and I think this is actually an important distinction to make. Is this double- vs single- something codified somehow? As a last word, I need to be nitpicky: the exact French typography rule is "a before punctuation made of two parts (namely colon, semi-colon, exclamation/question mark) and no before punctuation made of a single part (dots, commas.)" It's a very deterministic rule that is easy to apply (whether one agrees to it or not.) [[User:Ralfoide|Ralfoide]] ([[User talk:Ralfoide|talk]]) 16:40, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
::This is a common question from the French and some other nationals. The answer is that English does not work that way. There is no official codified version. The most you have is small pockets of codification within an organization, such as The University of Boulder, or UPI or the US Army. If you're working in or with such an organization you should use their standard. If you try to extend any such standard to the rest of the world you are a nasty egomanical control freak who should be chopped into pieces and fed to the fishes.--[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.188|173.245.52.188]] 18:25, 4 November 2013 (UTC)

As a german typographer I have to say I’m ''shocked''! ''Two'' s per period? A ''before'' punctuation?! My scientific opinion: you all are completely crazy ;-) (Just kidding, but seriously, two s? In Germany, the first possibility to do that safely is your last will …) [[User:Quoti|Quoti]] ([[User talk:Quoti|talk]]) 10:34, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

The doubled s appear in my browser's tooltips. (Maybe someone should add some non breaking s to the quotation of the tooltip text?) --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.236|141.101.98.236]] 10:45, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

As a(n automatic) two-spacer person (just you watch, I'll use 'em here, despite it obviously not being rendered), it's just what I learnt, back in the '70s, here in the UK. I've no idea ''why'' I learnt it. However, it may stem from the same root as the 'rule' in handwriting (not biros, but nibbed pens dipped in ink... wow, I feel old, but it ''was'' at primary school) that we use a gap as big as our our (very little) little-fingers to separate sentences. I imagine differentiating full-stops (US: periods) from commas in the messy medium of ink might be a valuable visual indicator as to what a given smudge might ''actually'' be. So, anyway, double-spacing. On the other hand I should report that, "I've dropped the habit it of appropriate punctuation prior to quotes," I say, "despite being the way I learnt it." And instead I will drop "<- Commas from that sort of position," you see, "even through I'll keep the ones that are semantic pauses." You see how my standards are slipping? Anyway, good comic. We now return you to your regularly-scheduled programme.  [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.214|141.101.98.214]] 14:44, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

:I'm in the same boat this this bloke. I don't get the typewriter tie in. I seem to recall being taught to use a finger gage correct gap of whitespace to leave between the end of one sentence and the beginning of the next. This was in an American small town southern school in the early 1980s. I assume it was for readability. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.236.25|108.162.236.25]] 16:16, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

The "third way" is used for articles on the [http://www.bbc.co.uk/news BBC News] website :-) --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.233|141.101.99.233]] 14:52, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:Actually, they put each sentence into a paragraph of its own, which is yet different. (In HTML: <code>... .</code> vs. <code>... . </code>) --[[User:Das-g|Das-g]] ([[User talk:Das-g|talk]]) 16:07, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:That's what I came here to say, that the Third Way is common-place on the web today, it is the tabloid style. This headline article http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-24775846 off the BBC right now only has full-stops (periods in en-US) before paragraph breaks, apart from quotations (ie what the BBC did not write). [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.229|141.101.98.229]] 16:11, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:The BBC is not the only web site to do that - and it is '''so''' annoying. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.222.244|108.162.222.244]] 10:15, 2 November 2013 (UTC)

There's a FOURTH way! I receive a "Weekly Update from Tim Scott" HTML formatted about once a week (unsurprisingly) which, in lieu of s between words, uses a carriage return and a linefeed. This alleviates the question of how many s between sentences completely! It also renders as oneverylongword in my client. Ie: <blockquote>Thankyouforsubscribingtomye-newsletter.</blockquote> [[Special:Contributions/108.162.236.25|108.162.236.25]] 16:16, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
: And a fifth: In France, they use one whitespace before and after double punctions (:;?!) but only one whitespace after single punctuation (.,). --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.79.25|141.101.79.25]] 20:15, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

I think the finger was to help kids create clear separation while developing their proficiency at penmanship.
I think the 2x is a fall out from the fixed width formatting of typewriters to help assist the reader (or proof reader) with the start and end of a sentence.
Double spacing has almost become OCD for me. I can't help it. Of course I also leave paragraph marks on while I type as well. I wonder if the French would require a before a double quote, "The author ponders. "

I think we could improve old school cryptography if we just used carriage returns and ignored the 'new' line.
I might be able to accept and adopt the single rule if I can make my s default to twice the point size of every other character in the style.
[[Special:Contributions/199.27.128.186|199.27.128.186]] 19:00, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
:FOROL DSCHO OLCRY PTOGR APHYT AKEYO URCUE FROME NIGMA DECOD ESAND ARRAN GEEVE RYTHI NGING ROUPS OFFIV EWITH OUT''AN Y''PUNC TUAT IONAN DINAL LCAPS  [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.214|141.101.98.214]] 01:38, 2 November 2013 (UTC)

I have my word processor set to a a gap equal to one and a half s after a sentence ends[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.198|173.245.52.198]] 19:05, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

New paragraph (TWO line brakes) after every sentence :-) --[[User:Sten|Sten]] ([[User talk:Sten|talk]]) 20:36, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

I love how the explanation uses the third method. Nice touch. [[User:JRDeBo|JRDeBo]] ([[User talk:JRDeBo|talk]]) 23:29, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

Does anyone think there's any significance to the sword and the spear? [[Special:Contributions/108.162.208.144|108.162.208.144]] 23:46, 2 November 2013 (UTC)
:Yes, because this is a SERIOUS ISSUE. [[User:Alpha|Alpha]] ([[User talk:Alpha|talk]]) 06:35, 4 November 2013 (UTC)
:A sword has a longer blade, while a spear keeps people further away. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.210|108.162.219.210]] 12:45, 4 November 2013 (UTC)

According to the [[http://fireemblemwiki.org/Weapon_triangle Fire Emblem weapon triangle]], the 1-spacers win against the 2-spacers. Then again, I put one after each sentence. [[User:Greyson|Greyson]] ([[User talk:Greyson|talk]]) 18:25, 4 November 2013 (UTC)

Picture of a cat after every full stop !!! {{unsigned ip|173.245.51.221}}

With all the whitespace compression and variable width fonts in modern technology switching back to 2- is as viable as switching over to localized Programmer Dvorak. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.231.18|108.162.231.18]] 13:44, 6 November 2013 (UTC)

Hey, does anyone know if there's any way to make the wiki keep two s in a row, so the title text shows up properly? [[User:SuperSupermario24|Just some random derp]] 15:46, 7 July 2015 (UTC)

I was mildly confused about the weird phrasing of "This comic refers to the dance-off occurring ..." I already forgot my browser plugin that I've installed an hour ago. I think its great that it happened on a xkcd-related site. --[[Special:Contributions/141.101.92.22|141.101.92.22]] 12:41, 13 May 2016 (UTC)

I'm not from the US so I never actually heard about a rule with two s. From my point of view the rule is stupid, really dumb. Just let go of it! There is no reason for it. My brain starts to spasm when I hear about a rule of two s after a period. Ungh!! {{unsigned ip|162.158.86.113}}

The 2 s used in (early) PCs and TypeWriters (and TTYs) could be caused by the too little difference between a «.» and a «,» with little fonts on CRTs (''320*200px with 8*8px single letter with <16" monitors with a signal trought an RF cable, for a C64''), dot-printers (''like 60*75 dpi (h*v), 9*9 per character, for an Epson MX-80'') and typewritten sheets (''maybe with dirty sort/type'')?
[The examples in parentheses are for a mid-level-case, because there are worst monitors and standards than those, see previous comments]
''Nickh''²+, [[Special:Contributions/188.114.103.166|188.114.103.166]] 00:11, 10 November 2016 (UTC) .

Well, looks like the one-spacers will win due to the weapon triangle. After all, lances best swords. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.174.64|172.68.174.64]] 16:54, 17 January 2019 (UTC)
:Do line breakers count as axes or staves? [[User:Netherin5|Netherin5]] ([[User talk:Netherin5|talk]]) 14:06, 19 March 2019 (UTC)

I just realized that there's a line break after ever sentence in this article.
(Insert formatting here)
:It’s four tildes (~ Those guys) to sign your comment. [[User:Netherin5|Netherin5]] ([[User talk:Netherin5|talk]]) 14:06, 19 March 2019 (UTC)

I have an easy solution to the debate.
Just press the TAB key after each sentence (doesn't work here, because of editing reasons).

google docs actually enforces the one space style for capitalization.

2273: Truck Proximity

2020-02-26T20:47:37Z

173.245.52.97:

{{comic
| number = 2273
| date = February 26, 2020
| title = Truck Proximity
| image = truck_proximity.png
| titletext = See also: Farm animals and dinosaurs. I am so confident that there exists children's media that involves dinosaurs driving trucks on a farm that I'm writing this without even Googling to check.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created by a DINOSAUR DRIVING A TRUCK. Please mention here why this explanation isn't complete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

This comic is a graph showing the relationship between time spent in proximity to trucks and level of knowledge about different types of trucks. For the average person, the two go together: people who do not spend much time around trucks are less likely to have knowledge about trucks, and people who spend more time around trucks are more likely to have knowledge about trucks. People with jobs or hobbies involving trucks spend a lot of time with them and must know how they work, so they fit this trend but at a higher level on both axes. Small children think trucks are cool and learn a lot about them. They then share this knowledge with their parents. The parents keep children away from trucks.

The title text wagers that there are, in fact, books about dinosaurs driving trucks on farms. Indeed, [https://www.amazon.com/Dinosaur-Farm-Penny-Dale/dp/0763699365 Dinosaur Farm!] and [https://www.amazon.com/Dinosaur-Farm-Frann-Preston-Gannon/dp/1454911328 Dinosaur Farm] are two examples.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{comic discussion}}
Lots of dinosaurs driving equipment on a farm out there: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bUmxUWs1Uk or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YmgHz8zBZlk 173.245.52.97 20:47, 26 February 2020 (UTC)

Talk:2273: Truck Proximity

2020-02-26T20:47:01Z

173.245.52.97:

Lots of dinosaurs driving equipment on a farm out there: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bUmxUWs1Uk or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YmgHz8zBZlk [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.97|173.245.52.97]] 20:47, 26 February 2020 (UTC)

Talk:2258: Solar System Changes

2020-01-22T19:44:59Z

173.245.52.97: Adding info on Venus' past

* '''Support''' except keep Uranus. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.189.181|172.68.189.181]] 19:16, 22 January 2020 (UTC)

Wait ... WHAT??? Why isn't Niburu in this???? [[Special:Contributions/162.158.154.229|162.158.154.229]] 19:22, 22 January 2020 (UTC)
Its similar to https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/1902:_State_Borders [[Special:Contributions/172.68.47.102|172.68.47.102]] 19:37, 22 January 2020 (UTC)

* What Venus has been through

For "what Venus has been through" see [https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/giant-planetary-smashup-may-have-turned-venus-hot-and-hellish-180958377/] [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.97|173.245.52.97]] 19:44, 22 January 2020 (UTC)

2198: Throw

2020-01-20T21:40:25Z

173.245.52.97:

{{comic
| number = 2198
| date = September 3, 2019
| title = Throw
| image = throw.png
| titletext = The keys to successfully throwing a party are location, planning, and one of those aircraft carrier steam catapults.
}}
<div class="toclimit-3">{{TOC}}</div>
*To experience the interactivity of this game, visit the {{xkcd|2198|original comic}}.
==Explanation==

This is an interactive comic made to celebrate the release of [[Randall|Randall's]] new book, ''[[How To]]''. The comic is based on a chapter in the book.

As the comic celebrates the book, which was released on Tuesday, September 3rd, 2019, the comic was thus also released on a [[:Category:Tuesday comics|Tuesday]] to coincide with the release day, replacing that week's normal Wednesday release. This was the same timing used for another of Randall's book releases, when [[1608: Hoverboard]] came out on the Tuesday when [[Thing Explainer]] came out. Although the Hoverboard comic is much more complex than this one, they are both [[:Category:Dynamic comics|dynamic]] and [[:Category:Interactive comics|interactive]], with [[:Category:Comics with animation|animations]] a part of them. Also the [[xkcd Header text]] changed to [[xkcd_Header_text#2019-09-04_-_Happy_Release_Day_-_bookstore|promote the release]] creating a large [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/0/08/2198_Throw_-_Front_page_promotion.PNG combined promotion] of the book during the three full days the comic was on the front page (see more [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Entire_xkcd_page_with_promotion|here]]).

In this comic the viewer can select a thrower and an object to be thrown, see this [[#Throwers and throw items|table]], and get an [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Animation|animation]] of how the selected throw would work out, along with an estimated distance of the throw (both in the SI unit meter (m) and in other very arbitrary units; see this [[#Table of distance units|table]] below) if the throw was possible. Impossible throws include those where the thrower is not strong enough to thrown object, or when the thrower tries to throw themselves, which is possible as four "objects" are also listed as throwers, most prominently {{w|George Washington}}. As the comic picture above cannot show all the possible selections in the two windows, pictures of all can be found [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Throwers_and_Objects|here]]

The formula/guideline is apparently based on chapter 10 from the new ''How to'' book, see more under [[#Formulas|Formulas]].

It seemed though, that there was a special case to the calculations with {{w|Thor|Thor's}} hammer ({{w|Mjolnir}}). Because this comic obviously refers to the {{w|Thor (Marvel Comics)|Thor}} from the {{w|Marvel universe}}, played by another possible thrower, {{w|Chris Hemsworth}} in the {{w|Marvel_Cinematic_Universe}}, and {{w|Mjolnir (comics)|his hammer}}, which is enchanted such that only those deemed "worthy" are able to lift it. As such, despite its mass in principle being liftable by many of the characters, only Thor, God of Thunder (who is canonically worthy), is able to throw it. Also Thor is the only one who uses {{w|furlongs}} to measure his distances among the standard throwers. However, it is not a canonical part of this comic that only he can throw it, and its mass is not realistic, see more below.

[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/f/f3/2198_Throw_-_Original_without_you.PNG Originally], when the comic was just released, there where only 7 throwers and 15 things to throw, giving a total of 105 different combinations; see the [[#Table of throw distances|table]] below. But only Thor can throw all 15, with three of the objects (George Washington, Thor's hammer, and the car) unthrowable by any of the other throwers. The smaller critters can throw only a few things, so the total number of throws is much less than 105. Still, there is an animation for all 105 combinations, but with no throw distance for many of these.

But already on day one the comic was out, a new thrower was added with the standard name "You", and this person, with black hair and a [[1350:_Lorenz#Knit_Cap_Girl|knit cap]], was also added to the objects that can be thrown increasing the number of throwers to 8 and objects to be thrown to 16. However, it would not be true to say that the number of options now would be 8 x 16 = 128, since the "You" can be customized when selecting it in the throwers menu (but not when selecting You in the object menu). When doing so a new window called [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/thumb/4/48/2198_Throw_-_Custom_thrower.PNG/835px-2198_Throw_-_Custom_thrower.PNG Custom thrower] will open up over the comic. The "You" option can then be customized by changing the name (from the default "You"), and defining the height (default 5.8 ft = 1.77 m) and weight (default 160 lb = 72.57 kg), where ft (feet) can be changed to m (meter) and lb (pound) can be changed to kg (kilograms). But when doing so the window will not correct the number from feet to meter etc. but stay the same.

Below the above options there is line with four persons above it, defining a scale of ''athleticism'', the default second option being the drawing of "you" which represents ''Decent'' form (i.e. a normal person). The first on the scale is [[Black Hat]], who thinks moving things is for suckers, thus representing minimal athleticism. "You" in second position is in decent shape and pretty good form, representing decent athleticism. George Washington in third position represents extremely high athleticism, and as he states he threw so well they made him President. Finally the fourth position, representing a champion athlete, shows a person with a helmet with chin strap and goggles who states that he trains 36 hours a day by using a time machine. It is thus indicated that such athletes can only be so good by training more than is possible; for instance, if he travels 24 hours back every day, he could use 12 more of these to practice, making it 36 hours on that "normal day" and he would then still have 12 hours to eat and sleep/restitution before his next 36 hours training pass.

Changing away from the decent "You" to one of the other three characters on the athleticism scale does not, however, change the character used for the animation, which stays the same. But still this gives a very large number of different "yous" to both throw and be thrown.

A self-created character, unrealistically tall and heavy well over the human records for height ({{w|List of tallest people|272 cm}}) and/or weight ({{w|List of heaviest people|635 kg}}), can actually be able to [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/e/e3/2198_Throw_-_You_throw_hammer_settings.PNG throw Thor's hammer] (For instance 4m and 1000 kg, see more [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Hammer_throw|here]]. So it is not because it is magically inclined to only be thrown by Thor, it is just that the weight is set to 2000 kg, and only Thor of the standard characters have the strength (1000 times normal human strength) to throw such a heavy object. But if the "You" is big enough, the athletic difference with Thor will be compensated by sheer weight and height. See this table of [[2198:_Throw#Data_from_xkcd_code|data from the comic]] for the above numbers.

Interestingly, Thor can throw a squirrel 257 meters. If a Custom Thrower is created, and they are 200 meters tall and 150 KG, they can throw the squirrel 256 meters (1 meter less than Thor). Thor can throw an acorn 136 meters, and the Custom Thrower will throw it 133 meters. Now, Thor can throw Thor's Hammer 19 meters. The Custom Thrower can throw it 44 meters! Apparently there is more to the enchantment of Thor's Hammer than meets the eye, as it would have been expected that if Thor can throw a squirrel and an acorn farther than an extraordinary human, then certainly he could throw his own enchanted Hammer a longer distance. This is, of course, because the Custom Thrower now throws from much higher than Thor. As to why the height doesn't affect the acorn or squirrel throwing distance in the same way it does Thor's Hammer, we'll leave that to you, the reader.

The title text refers to throwing a party (a colloquial synonym of hosting a party) and first makes the assumption of actually giving hints for giving a party, and then switches to suggest a mechanism to literally throw a huge object, such as a house with a party going on inside. An {{w|Aircraft_catapult#Steam_catapult|aircraft steam catapult}} is a mechanism to launch aircraft from ships, typically used on aircraft carriers.

==Safety Considerations==
Many of the items, even if technically possible to throw, may not be able to be thrown safely.

For example:
* Depending on how the microwave oven is damaged when it hits the ground, it may still be able to appear to function, but no longer seal properly, and therefore leak dangerously high amounts of microwave radiation.
* Blenders have blades and glass. Even if no one is struck by the flying blender, the broken pieces would be hazardous later if they are not properly disposed of.
* Cars have gasoline and battery acid which may spill if one is thrown.
* A squirrel might bite the person attempting to throw it, which is dangerous as some squirrels have rabies.
* Pikachu could shock (possibly fatally) someone trying to throw it.
* If a {{w|Dwarf-tossing|person is thrown}}, that person may be badly injured. If you throw people without consent they might punch you.

==Throwers and throw items==
*Here is a table with first the throwers and then the objects to be thrown.
**George Washington, Pikachu, and the squirrel are both throwers and throwable objects, as are the costumed option "You".
**For these four this is noted in the explanation. The "You" is also the first object, Washington and Pikachu is no. 11-12 and the Squirrel is also the last object (no. 16) in the object list.

{| class="wikitable" |
! Image
! Name
! Explanation
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - you.png]]
|'''{{w|human|You}}'''
|'''Can also be thrown'''. The viewer may also choose to create a custom thrower, for instance, themself, inputting a name, height, weight, and general level of athleticism, as measured on a scale from "[[Black Hat]]" to "championship athlete" (a swimmer is pictured). The custom thrower is also selectable as a throwing item, presumably to provide more variety compared to the fixed values of George Washington.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - george.png]]
|'''{{w|George Washington}}'''
|'''Can also be thrown'''. The first president of the United States of America. There is a myth that a young George Washington threw a silver dollar across the Potomac River, which is more than a mile wide for much of its length; or alternatively that he would throw rocks across the Rappahannock River, which was about 300 feet wide near George's boyhood home. http://kenmore.org/education/kidstuff/legends.html. He is also used as a throwing item to represent the likelihood of a thrower distance with an average human as the projectile. George Washington is shown as a very powerful thrower; the comic makes fun of the flagrant embellishment of Washington's life.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - quarterback.png]]
|'''An NFL {{w|quarterback}}'''
|A quarterback in the National Football League is a highly athletic individual. Gridiron football is a full-contact sport that requires durability, speed, and precision. One of the primary skills required of quarterbacks is to be able to throw the football far with precise accuracy.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - pikachu.png]]
|'''{{w|Pikachu}}'''
|'''Can also be thrown'''. Pikachu is a species of Pokémon and the mascot of the Pokémon franchise as a whole. Although Pikachu are not normally shown to throw things, the ''Super Smash Bros'' series shows they are perfectly capable of picking things up that do not significantly out-size them. That said, Pikachu is capable of throwing a wide variety of objects through the move Fling, which allows the user to deal damage by throwing its held item (and, incidentally, a Fling TM). Its presence as a throwing item appears to reference the most recently released Pokémon games as of the comic's release, ''Pokémon Let's Go Pikachu'' and ''Pokémon Let's Go Eevee'', where the partner Pokémon of the respective title is not kept in a Poké Ball but thrown into battle when deployed. According to Pokédex entries throughout the series, the average Pikachu is 1'04" (0.4m) tall and weighs 13.2 lbs (6kg). Randall appears to have done his research, as a custom thrower with these stats and default athleticism will have near-identical results to Pikachu for both thrower and thrown item.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - carly.png]]
|'''{{w|Carly Rae Jepsen}}'''
|A Canadian music artist with [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgwAywJlo1M marginal throwing ability.]
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - thor.png]]
|'''{{w|Thor}}'''
|Thor is the god of thunder in Norse mythology, wielding a hammer that returns to its wielder when thrown. He is also {{w|Thor (Marvel Comics)|featured in Marvel comics}} and is portrayed by Chris Hemsworth (listed below) in the Marvel Cinematic Universe series of films. Thor was previously referenced in [[2097: Thor Tools]].
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - chris hemsworth.png]]
|'''{{w|Chris Hemsworth}}'''
|An Australian film actor, best known for his role as Thor in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - squirrel.png]]
|'''A {{w|squirrel}}'''
|'''Can also be thrown'''. A small mammal of the family ''Sciuradae'', known for hoarding acorns. Squirrels have been a [[:Category:Squirrels|recurring topic]] on xkcd and have been used in ''What if?'' in lieu of a subject that Randall really doesn't want to draw. Due to their small size, a squirrel is also selectable as a throwing item.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - microwave.png]]
|'''A {{w|microwave oven}}'''
|A common household appliance in most American homes, used to heat or reheat food for consumption.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - basketball.png]]
|'''A {{w|basketball (ball)|basketball}}'''
|An inflated sphere used as a projectile in the sport of the same name.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - blender.png]]
|'''A {{w|blender}}'''
|A common household appliance in most American homes, used to shred food or ingredients into slush for consumption or baking.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - gold_bar.png]]
|'''A {{w|gold bar}}'''
|The form in which gold is cast for storage.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - cake.png]]
|'''A {{w|wedding cake}}'''
|Traditionally a layer cake used for wedding receptions with copious amounts of frosting and figurines of the bride and groom standing upon the top layer. The figurines appear to have been removed before the cake is thrown, as they are before the cake is cut and served.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - pingpong.png]]
|'''A {{w|ping pong ball}}'''
|A small plastic sphere designed to bounce, used as a projectile in the sport of table tennis or "ping pong". Notably the ball is much more difficult to throw than the acorn, as its larger size yet much lighter weight causes it to lose more momentum due to air resistance.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - acorn.png]]
|'''An {{w|acorn}}'''
|A small nut which grows on oak trees and often serves as a squirrel's primary form of nourishment.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - hammer.png]]
|'''{{w|Mjolnir (comics)|Thor's hammer}}'''
|Mjolnir, an enchanted hammer in the {{w|Marvel universe}} which belongs to {{w|Thor (Marvel Comics)|Thor from Marvels comics}} and can only be lifted by those deemed worthy. It is based on {{w|Mjölnir}} the hammer of Norse God {{w|Thor}}, God of Thunder. In this comic, though, it appears that Mjolnir is just incredibly heavy, and Thor is able to throw it because he is very strong. The custom thrower is also able to throw it if their size and strength are set high enough. Setting aside this customization, Thor is the only standard thrower to be able to throw Thor's hammer. In the movies based on the Marvel universe, Thor is played by Chris Hemsworth, who is also one of the throwers, but in real life, he would of course not be able to throw such a weighty hammer.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - javelin.png]]
|'''A {{w|javelin}}'''
|An aerodynamic item like a spear thrown in Olympic sport.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - silver_spin.png]]
|'''A {{w|Dollar coin (United States)|silver dollar}} spinning'''
|A silver coin representing one (1) US dollar in value, as would have been common when George Washington was president. The coin is given two trajectories to choose from when thrown; Here '''spinning''', as one would properly throw a discus.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - silver_tumble.png]]
|'''A {{w|Dollar coin (United States)|silver dollar}} tumbling'''
|The coin's other possible trajectory, '''tumbling''', as might result from flipping a coin to make a decision. The spinning coin always goes farther than the tumbling one, since facing the air edge-on leads to a smaller area facing the wind and therefore less air resistance.
|-
|[[File:2198 Throw - car.png]]
|'''A {{w|car}}'''
|The most common form of long-distance transport in several well-developed countries.
|}

===Table of throw distances===
{| class="wikitable"
!Item / Thrower
!NFL Quarterback
!George Washington
!Pikachu
!Carly Rae Jepsen
!Thor
!Chris Hemsworth
!Squirrel
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Microwave oven'''
|10.32 m
|7.76 m
|N/A
|3.67 m
|181.57 m
|6.15 m
|N/A
|-
|33.85 feet
|25.46 feet
|N/A
|82.65 rack units
|1.99 football fields
|138.40 rack units
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Basketball'''
|40.18 m
|33.22 m
|2.34 m
|19.11 m
|113.67 m
|27.99 m
|N/A
|-
|16.74 horses
|19.54 smoots
|75.90 attoparsecs
|11.24 smoots
|1.42 Manhattan blocks
|16.46 smoots
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Blender'''
|16.58 m
|12.45 m
|N/A
|5.89 m
|333.25 m
|9.86 m
|N/A
|-
|9.75 smoots
|40.85 feet
|N/A
|132.51 rack units
|1.66 furlongs
|32.34 feet
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Gold bar'''
|9.73 m
|7.23 m
|N/A
|3.36 m
|549.28 m
|5.69 m
|N/A
|-
|31.93 feet
|23.73 feet
|N/A
|75.65 rack units
|2.73 furlongs
|128.11 rack units
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Wedding cake'''
|8.96 m
|6.75 m
|N/A
|3.2 m
|146.25 m
|5.35 m
|N/A
|-
|29.40 feet
|22.14 feet
|N/A
|72.00 rack units
|1.60 football fields
|120.45 rack units
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Ping-pong ball'''
|11.8 m
|11.63 m
|9.28 m
|11.25 m
|12.53 m
|11.41 m
|4.95 m
|-
|38.72 feet
|38.17 feet
|30.46 feet
|36.92 feet
|41.10 feet
|37.44 feet
|111.37 rack units
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Acorn'''
|83.00 m
|75.84 m
|28.16 m
|62.85 m
|135.98 m
|67.91 m
|6.53 m
|-
|1.04 Manhattan blocks
|0.95 Manhattan blocks
|16.57 smoots
|26.19 horses
|1.49 football fields
|28.30 horses
|146.85 rack units
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Thor's Hammer'''
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|19.32 m
|N/A
|N/A
|-
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|11.36 smoots
|N/A
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Javelin'''
|56.10 m
|42.04 m
|N/A
|20.12 m
|3028.75 m
|33.09 m
|N/A
|-
|23.37 horses
|17.51 horses
|N/A
|11.84 smoots
|15.06 furlongs
|19.46 smoots
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''George Washington'''
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|136.65 m
|N/A
|N/A
|-
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|1.49 football fields
|N/A
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Pikachu'''
|15.22 m
|11.41
|N/A
|5.39 m
|332.52 m
|9.03 m
|N/A
|-
|49.94 feet
|37.45 feet
|N/A
|121.18 rack units
|1.65 furlongs
|29.63 feet
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Car'''
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|27.22 m
|N/A
|N/A
|-
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|N/A
|16.01 smoots
|N/A
|N/A
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Spinning dollar'''
|177.09 m
|143.96 m
|16.91
|92.63 m
|1331.21 m
|115.89 m
|2.20 m
|-
|1.94 football fields
|1.57 football fields
|9.95 smoots
|1.16 Manhattan blocks
|6.53 furlongs
|1.45 Manhattan blocks
|71.41 attoparsecs
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Tumbling dollar'''
|58.17 m
|53.77 m
|13.92 m
|44.08 m
|84.82 m
|49.03 m
|2.14 m
|-
|24.24 horses
|22.41 horses
|45.67 feet
|18.37 horses
|1.06 Manhattan blocks
|20.43 horses
|69.42 attoparsecs
|-
|rowspan="2"|'''Squirrel'''
|58.64 m
|46.92 m
|2.92 m
|25.44 m
|256.54 m
|38.50 m
|N/A
|-
|24.43 horses
|19.55 horses
|65.71 rack units
|14.97 smoots
|1.28 furlongs
|16.04 horses
|N/A
|}

===Table of distance units===
*This is a table of the alternative distance units shown and their lengths in meters.
**Three of the units shown here are listed in the Wikipedia articles {{w|List of humorous units of measurement}}
**Five the units shown here are listed in the Wikipedia article {{w|List of unusual units of measurement}}.
***Only furlong and foot/feet are not in any of the lists (although a different type of feet is in the last list).
**There are ten alternative units in the source code for the comic. However, the wiffle unit cannot be used, and the light-nanosecond unit is inaccessible except by customization.
**Two of the units are off by an order of magnitude.
{| class="wikitable"
!Unit name
!Length in comic in meters
!Explanation
|-
|{{w|List_of_humorous_units_of_measurement#Wiffle|Wiffles}}
|0.0089
|A Wiffle, also referred to as a WAM for Wiffle (ball) Assisted Measurement, is equal to a sphere 0.089 m (3.5 inches) in diameter – the size of a {{w|Wiffle ball}}, a perforated, light-weight plastic ball frequently used by marine biologists as a size reference in photos to measure corals and other objects. Randall is thus a factor 10 off. While wiffles should be the next unit after rack-units and before feet, the unit conversion typo seems to prevent it from being accessible by any thrower-object combination, as it is now even smaller than the wrong measure for light-nanoseconds. Wiffles have thus only been discovered in the data of the comic, as it seems to be impossible to get it displayed in the comic itself.
|-
|{{w|List of unusual units of measurement#Light-nanosecond|Light-nanoseconds}}
|0.0299
|The light-nanosecond was popularized by Grace Hopper, referring to the length light could travel in a nanosecond. The actual length of a light-nanosecond is 0.299 m, about a foot long, but it seems that [[Randall]] was off by an order of magnitude. This measurement is used for lengths from 1 to 1.06 m, but none of the standard throwers or objects can be thrown for this short a distance, so it is not included in the table above. But with the custom user it is [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/a/a5/2198_Throw_-_Light_nanoseconds_1m.PNG possible to get down to 1 m] where it will then be used, but of course, since it says 33 light-nanoseconds instead of 3 it is wrong. See some examples [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Light_nanoseconds_error|here]].
|-
|{{w|List_of_humorous_units_of_measurement#Attoparsec|Attoparsecs}}
|0.03086
|The parsec is a unit of length used to measure large distances to astronomical objects outside the Solar System. A parsec is defined as the distance at which one {{w|astronomical unit}} subtends an angle of one {{w|arcsecond}}. One parsec is equal to about 3.26 light-years or 31 trillion kilometers (31×1012 km) or 19 trillion miles (19×1012 mi). Atto- is a unit prefix in the metric system denoting a factor of 10−18 or 0.000000000000000001. Together the two-unit exponents will almost cancel out, as 31 trillion kilometers can be written as 3.1×1018cm, meaning that an attoparsec is 3.1 cm. The unit is only used three times in non-customized settings: once for Pikachu and twice for the squirrel. This measurement is used for lengths from 1.06 to 2.69 meters. See [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/7/79/2198_Throw_-_Attoparsecs_107cm_setings.PNG example here].
|-
|{{w|List_of_unusual_units_of_measurement#Rack_unit|Rack units}}
|0.0445
|A {{w|Rack unit}} (abbreviated U or RU) is a unit of measure defined as 1 3⁄4 inches (44.45 mm). Mainly used to measure the overall height of the likes of {{w|19-inch rack}} frames or the equipment put in there. It is used for lengths from 2.69 to 6.67 meters.
|-
|{{w|Foot (unit)|Feet}}
|0.3048
|One foot is defined as 0.3048 meters. In customary and imperial units, the foot comprises 12 inches and three feet compose a yard. This measurement is used for lengths from 6.67 to 16 meters.
|-
|{{w|List_of_humorous_units_of_measurement#Smoot|Smoots}}
|1.7000
|The {{w|Smoot}} is a nonstandard, humorous unit of length created as part of an MIT fraternity prank. One smoot is equal to {{w|Oliver Smoot}}'s height at the time of the prank, 5 feet 7 inches (1.70 m). Mr. Smoot was used to measure the length of the Harvard Bridge (connecting Boston and Cambridge) by being repeatedly laid down along the length of the bridge; the markings indicating distances in smoots along the bridge have been maintained by the fraternity. This measurement is used for lengths from 16 to 36 meters. While the smoot is a nonstandard unit of length, Oliver Smoot has been chairman of the American National Standards Institute (ANSI) and President of the International Organization for Standardization (ISO). ANSI and ISO are among the world's main standardizing bodies, so Randall may indirectly be making the pun that while Smoot's body isn't a standard measure, Smoot has been in charge of bodies that standardize measurements.
|-
|{{w|List_of_unusual_units_of_measurement#Horse|Horses}}
|2.4
|The length of a {{w|horse}} varies a lot with the horse type, breed, age, and genes. In the Wikipedia article on horses, the length of a horse is not even mentioned, only the height and weight. But Randall has used horses for measurements before. A {{w|horse length}} is approximately 8 feet (2.4 m). This measurement is used for lengths from 36 to 75 meters.
|-
|{{w|List_of_unusual_units_of_measurement#Block|Manhattan blocks}}
|80.0
|The numbered streets in {{w|Manhattan}} run east-west and are generally 60 feet (18 m) wide, with about 200 feet (61 m) between each pair of streets. With each combined street and {{w|City block|block}} adding up to about 260 feet (79 m), there are almost exactly 20 blocks per mile. The typical block in Manhattan is 250 by 600 feet (76 by 183 m). When driving in a grid-like city, the {{w|Manhattan distance}} between two points is a concept, although it is also called {{w|Taxicab geometry}}. It seems like it is indeed the combined street and block distance. This measurement is used for lengths from 75 to 131 meters.
|-
|{{w|List_of_unusual_units_of_measurement#Football_field_(length)|Football fields}}
|91.44/109.728
|A football field in the comic is 100 yards or 91.44 m long. An {{w|American football field}} is 100 yards between the end zone although by including those it is actually 120 yards or 109.728 m. Although it is an American comic, it doesn't state that it is an American Football field. A {{w|Football pitch}} in {{w|Association football}} (Soccer) is also often used, and although the length of those varies the usual size for champions league matches is 105 m. This measurement is used for lengths from 131 to 201 meters.
|-
|{{w|Furlongs}}
|201.168
|A furlong is a measure of distance in imperial units and U.S. customary units equal to one-eighth of a mile. It is part of the {{w|List_of_humorous_units_of_measurement#FFF_units|FFF_units}} of the {{w|FFF system}} for furlong/firkin/fortnight, length, mass and time. One furlong should therefore be 201.168 meters, though the United States does not uniformly use this conversion ratio. Older ratios are in use for surveying purposes in some states. Only Thor's distances are given in furlongs. This measurement is used for lengths of 201 meters (1 furlong) and up. For the standard throwers and items only Thor can throw over 200 m, thus only he uses Furlongs to measure his throws. Given that this is an old unit, and Thor is based on ancient Nordic Mythology, this may seem appropriate.
|}

===Data from xkcd code===
*A user got this data from the code (and added it to the comments).
**But it makes sense to include here:
*From this it can be seen that:
**Thor's Hammer is not special, just very heavy, 2000 kg despite being rather small.
**Thor has the same stats as Chris, except he has 1000 times more Throw power (10,000 vs 10).
*The customizable You can have Throw power of 5, 10, 15 and 20, and weight and height can be set along with the name.
**The diameter is calculated from the formula given, so in the standard setting it is about 0.5 m.

{| class="wikitable"
! id
! name
! canThrow
! canBeThrown
! length (m)
! diameter (m)
! mass (kg)
! dragC
! throwPower
|-
| microwave
| A microwave oven
| false
| true
| 0.406
| 0.406
| 10.591
| 0.8
|
|-
| basketball
| a basketball
| false
| true
| 0.243
| 0.243
| 0.624
| 0.3
|
|-
| blender
| a blender
| false
| true
| 0.203
| 0.203
| 5.216
| 0.8
|
|-
| gold_bar
| a gold bar
| false
| true
| 0.0535
| 0.0535
| 12.4
| 0.8
|
|-
| cake
| a wedding cake
| false
| true
| 0.51
| 0.51
| 13
| 0.8
|
|-
| pingpong
| a ping pong ball
| false
| true
| 0.04
| 0.04
| 0.003
| 0.5
|
|-
| quarterback
| an NFL quarterback
| true
| false
| 1.905
| 0.584
| 102.058
| 0.6
| 20
|-
| acorn
| an acorn
| false
| true
| 0.0191
| 0.0191
| 0.0045
| 0.3
|
|-
| hammer
| thor's hammer
| false
| true
| 0.5
| 0.15
| 2000
| 0.4
|
|-
| javelin
| a javelin
| false
| true
| 1.8
| 0.0254
| 0.8
| 0.1
|
|-
| george
| George Washington
| true
| true
| 1.829
| 0.562
| 90.718
| 0.6
| 15
|-
| pikachu
| Pikachu
| true
| true
| 0.4
| 0.3
| 5.9874
| 0.4
| 10
|-
| car
| A car
| false
| true
| 4.5
| 2.134
| 1179.34
| 0.25
|
|-
| silver_spin
| a silver dollar (spinning)
| false
| true
| 0.04
| 0.011
| 0.027
| 0.5
|
|-
| silver_tumble
| a silver dollar (tumbling)
| false
| true
| 0.04
| 0.04
| 0.027
| 0.66
|
|-
| carly
| Carly Rae Jepsen
| true
| false
| 1.575
| 0.46
| 49.895
| 0.6
| 10
|-
| thor
| thor, god of thunder
| true
| false
| 1.91
| 0.59
| 91
| 0.6
| 10000
|-
| chris hemsworth
| chris hemsworth
| true
| false
| 1.91
| 0.59
| 91
| 0.6
| 10
|-
| squirrel
| A squirrel
| true
| true
| 0.203
| 0.096
| 0.454
| 0.6
| 10
|-
| you (can change)
| You
| true
| true
| 1.77
| (mass^(1/3))/8
| 72.5
| 0.6
| 10
|}

===Formulas===
<math>\begin{array}{lcl}
g&=&9.805 \frac{\mathrm m}{{\mathrm s}^2} = 9.805 \frac{\mathrm N}{\mathrm{kg}}\\
A&=&\sqrt[3]{\frac {3 * \mathrm{thrower\_length} * \mathrm{thrower\_throwPower} * \mathrm{thrower\_mass}} {\mathrm{object\_mass} + \mathrm{thrower\_mass} / 1000}}\\
B&=&\sqrt{\frac{2 * \mathrm{object\_mass} * g}{\pi * {(\mathrm{object\_diameter} / 2)}^2 * 1.2041 \frac{\mathrm{kg}}{{\mathrm m}^3} * \mathrm{object\_dragC}}}\\
\mathrm{distance}&=&\frac{A^2 * \sqrt2} {g * \sqrt{\frac{A^4} { B^4} * 0.8 + \frac{A^2} {B^2} * 3 + 2}}
\end{array} </math>

Constants and Units:
* g is the gravitational acceleration (on earth)
* 1.2041 kg/m³ is the density of air at sea level
* A (in m/s) is the calculated throw speed regardless of direction, if you assume constant throw power over time in Watts and the body length as acceleration distance (arm has half the body length and goes from back to front) from 0 m/s to the final speed
* B is the possible throw speed, which still does not air brake the object too much. If the object is thrown at that speed, i.e. A = B, the distance is reduced to 58,7%. B is only dependent on the object. If B was set to infinite, the air resistance would be removed from the formulas.
* throwPower is in m²/s³, or equivalently W/kg (Watts per body mass)
* dragC is without unit and signifies the air resistance of the object and is dependent on the shape

==Extra pages==
As this comic is very complicated several screen shots and tables are needed for the full explanation. In order to keep this main page easy to use, these pictures and possibly some of the tables will be placed on some extra pages, as has also been done with [[:Category:Comic subpages|other complex comics]] in the past:
*[[2198: Throw/Screen-shots]]

==Transcript==
:[As this is an interactive comic, not all possible text should be given in this transcript. Also, it is not possible to see all the different throwers or objects in one image. This transcript here includes the text that can be found when loading the page, without changing the thrower or object (the default), but also includes the text that can be found by scrolling in the two select "windows" as that would be similar to a long comic where you need to scroll as well as customization options. For further differences that occur by changing the objects refer to a table of all combinations.]

:[A heading with a subheading is above a line, beneath which are a sentence, that is generated by the selections in the two windows beneath this sentence:]
:<big>'''Throw Calculator'''</big>
:This calculator implements the approximate throwing distance estimation model from ''How To'' Chapter 10: ''How to throw things''.

:How far could George Washington throw a Microwave oven?

:[Beneath this sentence are two "windows" with a frame around them, one to the left and one to the right, each with a heading breaking the top frame. Each also has a scroll bar to the right, which allows one to scroll down through 8 different possible selections in the left window and 16 in the right window. There are, depending on the browser zoom level, one or two selections on each line. Each window's content is given here under their respective headings. Each possible selection is a drawing with a caption beneath it.]
:Select a thrower

:*You
:*An NFL Quarterback
:*George Washington
:*Pikachu
:*Carly Rae Jepsen
:*Thor, God of Thunder
:*Chris Hemsworth
:*A squirrel

:Select an object to be thrown
:*You
:*A microwave oven
:*A basketball
:*A blender
:*A gold bar
:*A wedding cake
:*A ping-pong ball
:*An acorn
:*Thor's Hammer
:*A javelin
:*George Washington
:*Pikachu
:*A car
:*A silver dollar (spinning)
:*A silver dollar (tumbling)
:*A squirrel

:[Below the two windows is the result of the animation that will happen when a selection has been made. An animation of the selected thrower throwing (or failing to throw) the selected object is shown, and the object's traveling distance is measured out both in meters (SI units) and in some other unit in brackets below. If the distance is not too long compared to the size of the object and thrower, then both can be seen, and in case the object is soft it may break from the throw.]

:[In the pre-selected version, George Washington throws a microwave oven, which ends up several meters from him lying on a corner broken with its wire lying beneath it. The distance is given under the ruler along which the throw has occurred, with markings for approximately every meter. In this case, there are seven steps even though the distance is above 7 meters:]
:7.76 meters
:(25.46 feet)

:[Clicking on "You" in the thrower box opens a new window over the above described comic parts. some of the comic can still be seen including the thrower and his item, and a new throw occurs every time something is changed in this new window. It is a customization box with several options shown below.]

:Your Name
:____You_____ [can be changed]

:Height
:5.8 ft [number can be changed; ft can be changed to m]

:Mass
:160 lb [number can be changed; lb can be changed to kg]

:Athleticism
:[Below is a scale showing Black Hat, the character depicting You with a knit cap, George Washington, and a person with goggles and a helmet. A marker is set at You, but can be changed. Below the characters are descriptions.]
:Black Hat: Moving objects around is for suckers.
:Minimal
:You: I'm in decent shape and have pretty good form.
:Decent
:George Washington: I'm so good at throwing they made me president.
:Extremely High
:Goggles: I use a time machine to train for 36 hours a day.
:Champion Athlete

:[Once done the box can be clicking on a cross at the top right or just clicking outside the window on the comic behind it. Now the thrower you (and the object you) will have the weight, length and strength chosen and will be able to throw (or be thrown) with these stats. ]

==Trivia==
*The comic refers to Thor as the character from the Marvel comics and movies (and other media), who is himself a reference to the ancient Norse god. In Marvel Cinematic Universe movies, Thor is played by Chris Hemsworth.
*Thor's hammer, Mjölnir, bears an enchantment that prevents any living being from lifting it unless they are "worthy." This is reflected in the simulation by giving Mjölnir a mass of 2,000 kg.
**In-universe, Thor's hammer weighs [https://urbandud.files.wordpress.com/2011/08/detail-128-thors-hammer.jpg?w=550 42.3 pounds].
*The option to customize your own character was added to the comic later.
*Due to a bug, the calculations for the customized person ('you') are incorrect when the mass is specified in pounds
*When the comic came out there was a mistake so the item to be thrown was named the same as the thrower, except for the coins and for when Pikachu and George Washington tried to throw themselves in which case it for instance said:
**[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/9/93/2198_Throw_-_Original_error_George_Himself.PNG How far could George Washington throw himself?]
**But if he picked another object it would write:
***[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/c/c9/2198_Throw_-_Original_error_George_George.PNG How far could George Washington throw George Washington?]
**See more examples [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Errors|here]]
===Examples of distances===
*The [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/5/5a/2198_Throw_-_You_1_kg_throw_hammer_max_distance.PNG maximum distance] of any throw is 743079 m, which Thor's Hammer can be thrown by a customized you that is high enough. If the height is large enough the mass can be the [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/8/8e/2198_Throw_-_You_1_kg_throw_hammer_max_distance_setting.PNG minimum 1 kg].
**See details [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Maximum_distance|here]].
***However the comic asks the user to not use height over 100 m and mass over 1000 kg.
***See details [[2198:_Throw/Screen-shots#Maximum_height_and_mass|here]].
*A one foot tall Champion Athlete You with a mass of over 524,644.3 pounds can throw the car 44 feet. In fact, the mass can be defined to 70 or more decimal places, with each incremental change allowing You to throw the car 44 feet, as long as the addition is sufficient
**Tester used trial and error and became bored after inputting the mass below:
***524,664.3134471218218095600605010996328125[35 zeroes]1
*A one pound Champion Athlete You with a height of 480,651 feet, 1 and 9/64th inches can also throw the car 44 feet
**Subtracting 1/64th of an inch prevents the CAY from throwing the car

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with animation]] 
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Interactive comics]]
[[Category:Physics]] 
[[Category:American football]] 
[[Category:Comics featuring politicians]] 
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]] 
[[Category:Religion]] 
[[Category:Squirrels]]
[[Category:Food]] 
[[Category:Basketball]]
[[Category:Sport]] 
[[Category:Book promotion]]
[[Category:How To]]

2243: Star Wars Spoiler Generator

2020-01-16T18:18:58Z

173.245.52.97: /* Table */ fixed my template mistake

{{comic
| number = 2243
| date = December 18, 2019
| title = Star Wars Spoiler Generator
| image = star wars spoiler generator.png
| titletext = The heroes seem to be gaining the upper hand until Darth Juul manages to flip the switch on the car wash control panel from 'REGULAR' to 'PREMIUM.'
}}

==Explanation==
On December 20, 2019 (2 days after the publication of this comic), the final movie of the "Skywalker saga" of ''Star Wars'' films, ''{{w|Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker}}'', was officially released to the US. It received a world premiere in Los Angeles on December 16, so there are lots of spoilers online, and also lots of people who want to avoid spoilers. [[Randall]] has created a flowchart that generates "spoilers" to the film, but as he probably has not seen the film (or, if he has, he doesn't actually want to spoil it for us), all of the so-called spoilers are nonsensical.

The formula for each spoiler is as follows: "In this Star Wars movie, our heroes return to take on the First Order and new villain '''[villain name]''' with help from their new friend '''[friend name]'''. Rey builds a new lightsaber with a '''[color]''' blade, and they head out to confront the First Order's new superweapon, the '''[superweapon name]''', a space station capable of '''[evil plan]'''. They unexpectedly join forces with their old enemy '''[character]''' and destroy the superweapon in a battle featuring '''[strange event]'''. P.S. Rey's parents are '''[character]''' and '''[character]'''".

The {{w|First Order (Star Wars)|First Order}} is the main antagonist group in the ''Star Wars'' {{w|Star Wars sequel trilogy|sequel trilogy}} series. In ''{{w|Star Wars: The Force Awakens}}'', they use a superweapon in their base, Starkiller Base, to destroy the planetary system housing the headquarters of the {{w|New Republic (Star Wars)|New Republic}}, the democratic government which was formed after the {{w|Galactic Empire (Star Wars)|Empire}}'s defeat in ''{{w|Return of the Jedi}}''.

"Building a {{w|lightsaber}}" is one of the rites of passage for becoming a {{w|Jedi}} Knight. In the {{w|Star Wars prequel trilogy|prequel trilogy}}, new Jedi build lightsabers as an official part of the journey towards Knighthood, and in the {{w|Star Wars Trilogy|original trilogy}}, {{w|Luke Skywalker}} builds a lightsaber between ''The Empire Strikes Back'' and ''Return of the Jedi'' as part of his training with {{w|Yoda}}. {{w|Rey (Star Wars)|Rey}} has used the lightsaber that {{w|Darth Vader|Anakin Skywalker}} made and used (which Luke also used when he was a new Jedi) for the first two movies of the sequel trilogy, and so it would be thematically appropriate for her to build her own prior to the trilogy's final entry. Most Jedi's lightsabers are either blue or green, with a few notable exceptions (e.g. {{w|Mace Windu}}'s purple lightsaber signifies his incredible combat prowess). Kyber crystals are aligned with the Light Side of {{w|the Force}}, so {{w|Sith}} must overpower and "bleed" their crystals before they will function for them, which causes their distinctive red color. Having a lightsaber of a color other than blue, green, or red is often seen in the ''Star Wars'' fandom as a sign of being a "[https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MarySue Mary Sue]", which is an accusation which has been made of Rey.

Another common plot point in ''Star Wars'' media is the construction, use, and destruction of a superweapon. These are inspired by stories and media of World War II, in which militaries sought to find, attack, and destroy critical elements of their enemies' resources and infrastructure, and meanwhile would construct elaborate defenses for themselves. The attack on the {{w|Death Star}} in particular is inspired by {{w|Operation Chastise}}, the "bouncing bomb" attack on Germany's hydroelectric power plants; Operation Chastise was dramatised in the {{w|The Dam Busters (book)|1951 book}} and {{w|The Dam Busters (film)|1955 film}} ''The Dam Busters'', which was [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNdb03Hw18M very thoroughly homaged] by ''A New Hope''. The original trilogy of movies only had two Death Stars, but superweapons quickly became a staple of the {{w|Star Wars expanded to other media|Expanded Universe}} fiction, to the point that one book had {{w|Han Solo}} make fun of the Empire's tendency towards building superweapons, proposing such ridiculous names as "Galaxy Destructor" and "Nostril of Palpatine". Superweapons are common in superhero stories.

Redemption and making allies of old enemies is also a common plot point in ''Star Wars''. Anakin Skywalker fell to the Dark Side and became Darth Vader, but eventually returned to the Light Side to protect his son, and Han Solo was initially a morally ambiguous character who was eventually convinced to join the Rebellion.

Rey, one of the main characters in the sequel trilogy series is an orphan, who was left behind on the planet Jakku as a child. As Rey is Force-sensitive and adept at using a lightsaber, there is much speculation among Star Wars fans as to the identity of her parents. Many major characters in ''Star Wars'' have unexpected heritages of great portent, most famously Luke, who was very distressed to learn that Darth Vader did not ''kill'' his father, as Obi-Wan had told him, but ''is'' his father. In ''{{w|Star Wars: The Last Jedi}}'', villain {{w|Kylo Ren}} tells her that she is the child of "filthy junk traders", but many fans speculate that he was lying to her.

The title text refers to the bottom option of the [strange event in battle] section. Apparently Lord Juul (or Darth Juul) is fighting the heroes in the Sith car wash. It is unclear what "flipping the switch" from Regular to Premium would do, but it seems to be beneficial to Darth Juul. A "premium" car wash usually has more features than a regular car wash, e.g. more cleaning brushes, waxing the car, cleaning the tires, etc.

This is the second false fact generating comic, after [[1930: Calendar Facts]].

==Table==
{| class="wikitable"
! Entry
! Explanation
|-
! colspan="2" | New villain
|-
| Kyle Ren
|Kyle Ren is one letter away from {{w|Kylo Ren|''Kylo'' Ren}}, the adopted "Sith name" of Ben Solo, son of Han and Leia Solo. Kylo is one of the antagonists of the first two movies in the sequel trilogy, and presumably will be so in the third, but there's nobody in the films named "Kyle". (There are a handful of ''Legends'' characters named Kyle, most famously Kyle Katarn, protagonist of the ''Star Wars: Jedi Knight'' video game series.)
|-
| {{w|Malloc}}
| Malloc is a function used in the C programming language to allocate more memory in the running of a program. Malloc may sound similar to {{w|Darth Malak|Malak}}, the antagonist of the ''{{w|Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic}}'' video game. Improper use of the malloc and free functions can cause "memory leak" bugs in programs.
|-
|Darth Sebelius
| {{w|Sebelius}} is the last name of several people.
* {{w|Kathleen Sebelius}} is a former state representative and governor of Kansas who was Secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services under President Obama. Sebelius was the named party in a {{w|National Federation of Independent Business v. Sebelius|Supreme Court case}} that upheld the provisions of the {{w|Affordable Care Act}} ("Obamacare"). The naming of Sebelius as a villain may reference the fact that the ACA has been controversial among certain groups.
* {{w|Jean Sibelius}} is a reknowned Finnish composer. {{w|Sibelius (scorewriter)|Sibelius}} is also the name of a piece of music software.
Randall may have chosen this surname as it sounds similar to {{w|Darth Sidious}}, the overarching villain in the first 6 Star Wars films, who is rumored to return in the upcoming film.
|-
|{{w|Theranos}}
|Theranos was a medical technology company founded by {{w|Elizabeth Holmes}} which claimed to have developed revolutionary blood tests that could produce more data from limited volumes of blood than ever before. They were eventually found to have engaged in fraudulent activity, having tricked investors into thinking their technology was performing better than it actually was or ever could, which resulted in fines for Holmes and Theranos president {{w|Ramesh Balwani}} and the bankruptcy of Theranos. Theranos also sounds similar to {{w|Thanos}}, the main villain of the Infinity Saga in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
|-
|Lord Juul
|{{w|Juul}} is a brand of e-cigarettes. In addition to the broader controversy surrounding electronic cigarettes, Juul has been investigated for its sale of flavored additives for their cigarettes, which are alleged to be particularly attractive to minors. Juul is reminiscent of the "uu" in the names for clones {{w|Joruus C'baoth}} and {{w|Luuke Skywalker}} in {{w|Star Wars Legends|''Star Wars'' Legends}} stories, thus implying Lord Juul is a clone of a character named Jul. ''{{w|Yule|Jul}}'' is the Scandinavian name for the midwinter holidays, which fits as the comic appeared within the Yule season of 2019.
|-
! colspan="2" | New friend
|-
| Kim Spacemeasurer
| May be a parody of the name {{w|Luke Skywalker}}, one of the main characters in the original trilogy of films. Other "Nounverber" names in ''Star Wars'' include Starkiller, Luke's original last name which was later applied to Starkiller Base in ''The Force Awakens'', and Biggs Darklighter, Luke's childhood friend and fellow Rebel pilot who died in the attack on the original Death Star. Also note another Star Wars comic posted a few weeks before this one, [[2229: Rey and Kylo]], which shows those characters actually deciding to measure properties of space.
|-
|Teen Yoda
|{{w|The Child (Star Wars character)|The Child}}, commonly called "Baby Yoda" by fans and the media, is a breakout character from the Disney+ series ''{{w|The Mandalorian}}''. Randall envisions a "teenage" version of this character teaming up with the main characters. This may be in analogy to Groot in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, who appeared as an adult, then child, then teen, or other adaptations of original characters like the Teen Titans.
|-
|Dab Tweetdeck
| A {{w|Dab (dance)|dab}} is a dance move which is many decades old but was made popular by that name in the late 2010's. {{w|TweetDeck}} is an application for managing Twitter accounts. Taken together, "Dab Tweetdeck" could be a character name proposed by clueless Disney executives to attract "the kids" to see ''The Rise of Skywalker'', although one would think that this name would be heavily promoted and thus not a spoiler in that case.
Tweetdeck sounds similar to twi'lek, one of the humanoid alien races in Star Wars, who often are employed as dancers.
|-
| Yaz Progestin
| Yaz sounds like the first name of {{w|Maz Kanata}}, a supporting protagonist in the sequel trilogy. Yaz is a medication which contains {{w|Progestin}}, which imitates the effects of {{w|progesterone}}, a female sex hormone. It is used for purposes including birth control and acne treatment.
|-
| TI-83
| Droids in the Star Wars universe typically have names with letters and numbers, such as R2-D2, C-3PO, BB-8, etc. Randall has created a new character called "TI-83". In real life, the {{w|TI-83}} is a model of graphing calculator manufactured by {{w|Texas Instruments}} that is commonly used in American high schools. This mirrors the origin of the name "R2-D2", which was inspired when Lucas was working on ''{{w|American Graffiti}}'' and was asked for Reel 2, Dialog Track 2, which was abbreviated "R-2-D-2". He remarked that it would be a "great name" and included it in his then-in-development script for ''Star Wars''.
|-
! colspan="2" | Lightsaber colors
|-
| [beige/ochre/mauve/aquamarine/taupe]
| These are different colors, none of which is a "traditional" color for a lightsaber. {{w|Beige}} is a pale-grayish yellow. {{w|Ochre}} is a clay earth pigment ranging from yellow to deep orange or brown. {{w|Mauve}} is a pale purple color. A purple color has been used for a lightsaber in the prequel trilogy series, by Jedi Master {{w|Mace Windu}}. {{w|Aquamarine (color)|Aquamarine}} is a blueish green color. {{w|Taupe}} is a dark brown color between brown and gray.
|-
! colspan="2" | Superweapon names
|-
|Sun Obliterator
| There was an Expanded Universe superweapon called the "Sun Crusher", which would infiltrate a star system and shoot a special torpedo into the star to make it go supernova. May also be a reference to one of the doodles from What If?.
|-
|Moonsquisher
| There were no ''Star Wars'' superweapons with the word "Moon" in their title (or "squisher"), but in the no-longer-canon ''New Jedi Order'' series, Chewbacca was squished ''by'' a moon that was intentionally de-orbited by invading Yuuzhan Vong.
|-
|World Eater
| Possibly a reference to {{w|Alduin}}, the main villain of the popular game {{w|The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim}}. In the Expanded Universe, the Empire used World Devastators, massive machines that would strip-mine planets with tractor beams and make weapons and spacecraft from the extracted resources. Another possible reference is to the {{w|The_Doomsday_Machine_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|Planet Eater}} doomsday machine from the original Star Trek series. A further possible reference is to the World Eaters space marine legion from {{w|Warhammer 40,000}} franchise.
|-
|Planet Zester
| A {{w|zester}} is a cooking tool for zesting citrus fruit, that is, scraping off the outer layer of a citrus fruit to obtain the flavorful outer layer of its skin. Zesting a planet would be devastating to anything built or living on its surface.
|-
|Superconducting supercollider
| A {{w|supercollider}}, or particle accelerator, is a machine used to accelerate charged particles to very high speeds, for testing in particle physics. The {{w|Superconducting Super Collider}} was a proposed accelerator which was to be constructed in Texas, but was cancelled partway through construction. There has been some minor controversy over the {{w|safety of high-energy particle collision experiments}}, which could theoretically produce black holes, {{w|strangelets}}, or other doomsday scenarios, but all scientific examination of the energies involved has shown that all currently-existing and planned particle accelerators pose no threats. So far, the Earth has not been destroyed by any particle accelerator.{{Citation needed}}
|-
! colspan="2" | Station capabilities
|-
|blowing up a planet with a bunch of beams of energy that combine into one
|This is how the {{w|Death Star}} was depicted in ''{{w|Star Wars: A New Hope}}''. Many beams converged together to form one energy beam. The superweapon was used to destroy the planet Alderaan, as a way to intimidate Princess Leia.
|-
|blowing up a bunch of planets with one beam of energy that splits into many
|This is how the superweapon on Starkiller Base was depicted in ''{{w|Star Wars: The Force Awakens}}''. A single energy beam split into several beams, allowing it to attack many planets. The superweapon was used to destroy the planets in the Hosnian system, the headquarters of the New Republic.
|-
|cutting a planet in half and smashing the halves together like two cymbals
|Jango Fett's "seismic charge" weapon, which he used in a dogfight against Obi-Wan Kenobi in ''Attack of the Clones'', produced a plane wave that cut asteroids in half; presumably a larger weapon of this kind could do the same to a planet.
|-
|increasing the CO2 levels in a planet's atmosphere, causing rapid heating
|This is a reference to {{w|climate change}} currently occurring on planet Earth which most {{w|Scientific consensus on climate change|climate scientists}} believe is due mainly to human factors such as the burning of fossil fuels releasing ancient carbon sources into the air as carbon dioxide, and mass deforestation which means trees are not converting the carbon dioxide into sugars and collagen. [http://drroyspencer.com/ Few other climate scientists] believe the fraction of warming attributable to humans to be uncertain, and probably largely benign, and that recent warming might well be mostly natural.
This seems to have occurred on the planet {{w|Venus}}. Venus' atmosphere is 97% carbon dioxide, and it is also the hottest planet in the Solar System, due to a greenhouse effect, preventing the planet from cooling.
|-
|triggering the end credits before the movie is done
|The {{w|closing credits}} or end credits of a film is the list of cast and crew who were involved in the making of the film. It would be quite strange to show the end credits of the film before it has concluded, although it is one of the [https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CreditsGag types of credits gag] used in other media. This entry is considerably less damaging to a planet{{Citation needed}} than the other 4 entries in this section, but if early audiences are left unsatisfied by the movie, they might tell everyone else not to see it, which would put the ''Star Wars'' franchise in a perilous financial situation. This would negatively impact the villains as well as the heroes, but they might consider this a worthwhile trade if it is their best option at harming the heroes. This option may be a reference to exploiting a glitch to trigger a [https://youtu.be/Jf9i7MjViCE credit warp] in games such as Super Mario World. This may also be a reference to the Netflix interactive movie "Bandersnatch" in which certain choices triggered the end of the movie and caused it to start the credits.
|-
! colspan="2" | Old enemy/new friend
|-
|{{w|Boba Fett}}
| Boba Fett is a famous bounty hunter introduced in the ''{{w|Star Wars Holiday Special}}'' and made popular by ''{{w|The Empire Strikes Back}}''. On the Empire's orders, he helped capture Han Solo as part of a plot to capture Luke Skywalker. He later tried to prevent Luke from rescuing Han, but was knocked into a sarlacc pit, where he was presumed eaten. In the Expanded Universe, he survived and did eventually join the protagonists against extragalactic invaders; his survival has not been confirmed by Disney's new canon, but he would be a plausible character to bring back in ''The Rise of Skywalker''. A Mandalorian (not Boba Fett, but a bounty hunter using body-armour  from the same planet) is featured in the new Disney+ series, ''The Mandalorian''.
|-
|[https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Salacious_B._Crumb Salacious Crumb]
| Salacious B. Crumb is a Kowakian monkey-lizard who was Jabba the Hutt's jester. He wasn't exactly a major adversary, but he did pull one of C-3PO's eyes out. He was last seen on Jabba the Hutt's sail barge, which was made to explode after Han, Luke, and the rest of the heroes escaped from it, and is presumed dead.
|-
|[https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Exogorth The Space Slug]
| In ''The Empire Strikes Back'', Han Solo pilots the Millennium Falcon into a giant cave to evade pursuit and get time to effect repairs. He is interrupted when the cave turns out to be the mouth of a giant space slug, which the Falcon barely escapes. A giant space slug might be a powerful ally in a battle against a giant space station.
|-
|The bottom half of {{w|Darth Maul}}
| Darth Maul was cut in half by Obi-Wan Kenobi at the end of ''The Phantom Menace''. His "upper half", attached to mechanical legs, has returned as a villain in the ''Clone Wars'' TV series and ''{{w|Solo: A Star Wars Story|Solo}}''. Given that Maul was a Sith and Kenobi a Jedi, who trained Luke, who trained Rey, it would be extremely unexpected for his "bottom half" to join forces with the heroes, although presumably his bottom half would have to be attached to something, which might be better disposed towards Jedi.
If Darth Maul's bottom half did join the heroes, they might aid the heroes by using [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Force_kick force kicks].
|-
|YouTube commenters
| The sequel trilogy has received more mixed reviews from watchers than Disney might like, and many vocal non-fans have taken to commenting on YouTube (via videos and comments) on what they don't like about the new movies and new characters. If ''The Rise of Skywalker'' fully wins the crowd, an alliance between the heroes and their former critics would be extremely powerful, but with Rotten Tomatoes showing a critics' aggregate score of [https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/star_wars_the_rise_of_skywalker/ less than 60%] ("rotten"), it's going to be an uphill battle.
|-
! colspan="2" | Battle feature
|-
|a bow that shoots little lightsaber-headed arrows
|May be a reference to the [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Bowcaster bowcaster], a laser crossbow weapon used by the Wookie {{w|Chewbacca}}. It is unclear if the lightsaber-headed arrows are actually lightsabers in itself, as they would seem difficult to produce (as opposed to the Death Star, or even a bunch of sword versions of the arrow).
|-
|X-Wings and TIE fighters dodging the giant letters of the opening crawl
| The {{w|Star Wars opening crawl|"opening crawl"}} is a signature motif used in all the main Star Wars films, to explain the backstory and context of each film. {{w|X-Wing}}s and {{w|TIE fighter}}s are fighter-type spaceships used by the Rebels (and Resistance later on) and the Empire (and First Order), respectively. A dogfight scene during the opening crawl would involve {{w|Fourth wall|breaking the fourth wall}}, as the opening crawl is not presumed to be part of the universe of the films (except when so parodied, such as in {{w|Airplane II: The Sequel}}).
|-
|a Sith educational display that uses Force lightning to demonstrate the dielectric breakdown of air
|[https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Force_lightning Force lightning] is a power that Force users can use to generate electric energy from the user's hands. It was first used in ''Return of the Jedi'' by Emperor Palpatine (Darth Sidious) when Luke Skywalker refuses to give in to the dark side of the Force. Palpatine attempts to kill Luke with Force lightning, but Darth Vader saves Luke by throwing Palpatine down a reactor chute. Palpatine also used Force Lightning on Mace Windu and Yoda during their battles at the end of ''Revenge of the Sith''. None of these uses of Sith lightning were intended to be educational on the nature of {{w|lightning}}, although they could have been very educational on the pain, cruelty, and "unlimited power!" offered by the Dark Side of the Force. This might also be a reference to [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Sith_holocron sith holocron] — a device to store Force-related information and secrets, possibly.
|-
|Kylo Ren putting on another helmet over his smaller one
|Kylo Ren is famous for wearing his helmet in ''The Force Awakens'', which he styled after Darth Vader's helmet. Putting on another helmet over it would require a comically large helmet that might be compared to Dark Helmet, a character from the parody film ''{{w|Spaceballs}}'' who parodies Darth Vader.
|-
|a Sith car wash where the bristles on the brushes are little lightsabers
| While an unexpected car wash finale scene seems unlikely, it is not without precedent in cinema; ''[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adolescence_of_Utena Adolescence of Utena]'' featured the title character unexpectedly entering a car wash and transforming into a car (followed by a segue into a car race sequence).
George Lucas, the originator of Star Wars also wrote the movie "American Graffiti," which featured cars prominently. A subsequent movie "Car Wash," has been seen as a commentary on or imitation of "American Graffiti." Including a Sith car wash might reference the relation between these two films.[https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/25/movies/streaming-car-wash.html ‘Car Wash,’ a Raunchy 1970s Comedy Brimming With Meta and Mayhem].
|-
! colspan="2" | Rey's parent #1
|-
| {{w|Luke Skywalker|Luke}}
| Luke Skywalker is the main character of the original Star Wars films. Of all of the characters presented here, he is the one with the greatest likelihood of being Rey's father. When Maz gave Rey Luke's lightsaber, she said "[t]hat lightsaber was Luke's, and his father's before him, and now, it calls to you." Luke does not seem to recognize Rey as his child (or as anybody in particular), but Darth Vader did not recognize Luke or Leia as his children -- and indeed did not know that he had any living children -- until they were grown. However, unlike Anakin Skywalker, or the Luke Skywalker from the pre-Disney Expanded Universe, no canon materials have presented anyone with whom Luke has fallen in love or fathered a child.
|-
|{{w|Princess Leia|Leia}} and {{w|Han Solo|Han}}
|Princess Leia and Han Solo are the other main characters of the original Star Wars films. It is unlikely that Leia or Han are Rey's parents as they did not seem to recognize Rey in any of the sequel trilogy films, nor is there any indication that they have had more than one child (Ben Solo, AKA Kylo Ren).
|-
|{{w|Obi-Wan Kenobi|Obi-Wan}}
|Obi-Wan Kenobi was one of the main characters in the Star Wars prequel trilogy. He, along with Qui-Gon Jinn, discovered Anakin Skywalker, who later became Darth Vader. Kenobi dies at the second act of ''Star Wars: A New Hope'', sacrificing himself to allow Luke, Leia, and Han to escape the Death Star. Marriage and parenthood were forbidden by the Jedi Order, and Obi-Wan generally adhered to the Order's rules more closely than Anakin did; Obi-Wan did feel some mutual romantic attraction with Duchess Satine of Mandalore, but they both chose to remain in their respective organizations rather than pursue a relationship. Also, Obi-Wan stopped having a physical form decade before Rey was conceived.
|-
|a random junk trader
|This is who Kylo Ren claims that Rey is descended from: worthless, random junk traders.
|-
! colspan="2" | Rey's parent #2
|-
|{{w|Poe Dameron|Poe}}
|Poe Dameron is one of the main characters of the Star Wars sequel trilogy. He is a pilot in the Resistance. He is only 13 years older than Rey, and thus is most likely not her father.
|-
|{{w|BB-8}}
|BB-8 is an astromech droid owned by Poe Dameron. It is unlikely that Rey is descended from a (non-living) droid.
|-
|[ {{w|Amilyn Holdo}} /Laura Dern]
|Vice Admiral Amilyn Holdo, portrayed by Laura Dern, was a leader in the Resistance. She dies at the end of ''The Last Jedi'', sacrificing herself by jumping to light speed straight into the First Order's pursuing starship. Randall presents both Admiral Holdo, the character, and Laura Dern, the actress, as separate options for Rey's mother, but the former is not supported by any story material and the latter is impossible (Dern is alive here and now, not "a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away").
|-
|a random junk trader
| (see above)
|-
|that one droid from the Jawa Sandcrawler that says ''Gonk''
|This is [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/GNK_power_droid a droid] from ''Star Wars: A New Hope'' that says "Gonk". As in the BB-8 entry, it is unlikely that Rey is descended from a droid.
|-
|}

==Transcript==
:<big>Star Wars Spoiler Generator</big>

:[Shown below is a branching flowchart of sorts that begins at the phrase "In this Star Wars movie, our heroes return to take on the First Order and new villain...", then flows through various paths to build up a story.]

:In this Star Wars movie, our heroes return to take on the First Order and new villain...
::Kyle Ren
::Malloc
::Darth Sebelius
::Theranos
::Lord Juul

:...with help from their new friend...
::Kim Spacemeasurer
::Teen Yoda
::Dab Tweetdeck
::Yaz Progestin
::TI-83

:Rey builds a new lightsaber with a...
::beige
::ochre
::mauve
::aquamarine
::taupe

:...blade, and they head out to confront the First Order's new superweapon, the...
::Sun Obliterator
::Moonsquisher
::World Eater
::Planet Zester
::Superconducting Supercollider

:...a space station capable of...
::blowing up a planet with a bunch of beams of energy that combine into one
::blowing up a bunch of planets with one beam of energy that splits into many
::cutting a planet in half and smashing the halves together like two cymbals
::increasing the CO2 levels in a planet's atmosphere, causing rapid heating
::triggering the end credits before the movie is done

:They unexpectedly join forces with their old enemy...
::Boba Fett
::Salacious Crumb
::The Space Slug
::the bottom half of Darth Maul
::Youtube commenters

:...and destroy the superweapon in a battle featuring
::a bow that shoots little lightsaber-headed arrows
::X-Wings and TIE fighters dodging the giant letters of the opening crawl
::a Sith educational display that uses Force Lightning to demonstrate the dielectric breakdown of air
::Kylo Ren putting on another helmet over his smaller one
::a Sith car wash where the bristles on the brushes are little lightsabers

:P.S. Rey's parents are...
::Luke
::Leia
::Han
::Obi-Wan
::a random junk trader

:...and...
::Poe
::BB-8
::Amilyn Holdo
::Laura Dern
::a random junk trader
::that one droid from the Jawa Sandcrawler that says ''Gonk''

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]] 
[[Category:Programming]]

2243: Star Wars Spoiler Generator

2020-01-16T18:17:30Z

173.245.52.97: /* Table */

{{comic
| number = 2243
| date = December 18, 2019
| title = Star Wars Spoiler Generator
| image = star wars spoiler generator.png
| titletext = The heroes seem to be gaining the upper hand until Darth Juul manages to flip the switch on the car wash control panel from 'REGULAR' to 'PREMIUM.'
}}

==Explanation==
On December 20, 2019 (2 days after the publication of this comic), the final movie of the "Skywalker saga" of ''Star Wars'' films, ''{{w|Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker}}'', was officially released to the US. It received a world premiere in Los Angeles on December 16, so there are lots of spoilers online, and also lots of people who want to avoid spoilers. [[Randall]] has created a flowchart that generates "spoilers" to the film, but as he probably has not seen the film (or, if he has, he doesn't actually want to spoil it for us), all of the so-called spoilers are nonsensical.

The formula for each spoiler is as follows: "In this Star Wars movie, our heroes return to take on the First Order and new villain '''[villain name]''' with help from their new friend '''[friend name]'''. Rey builds a new lightsaber with a '''[color]''' blade, and they head out to confront the First Order's new superweapon, the '''[superweapon name]''', a space station capable of '''[evil plan]'''. They unexpectedly join forces with their old enemy '''[character]''' and destroy the superweapon in a battle featuring '''[strange event]'''. P.S. Rey's parents are '''[character]''' and '''[character]'''".

The {{w|First Order (Star Wars)|First Order}} is the main antagonist group in the ''Star Wars'' {{w|Star Wars sequel trilogy|sequel trilogy}} series. In ''{{w|Star Wars: The Force Awakens}}'', they use a superweapon in their base, Starkiller Base, to destroy the planetary system housing the headquarters of the {{w|New Republic (Star Wars)|New Republic}}, the democratic government which was formed after the {{w|Galactic Empire (Star Wars)|Empire}}'s defeat in ''{{w|Return of the Jedi}}''.

"Building a {{w|lightsaber}}" is one of the rites of passage for becoming a {{w|Jedi}} Knight. In the {{w|Star Wars prequel trilogy|prequel trilogy}}, new Jedi build lightsabers as an official part of the journey towards Knighthood, and in the {{w|Star Wars Trilogy|original trilogy}}, {{w|Luke Skywalker}} builds a lightsaber between ''The Empire Strikes Back'' and ''Return of the Jedi'' as part of his training with {{w|Yoda}}. {{w|Rey (Star Wars)|Rey}} has used the lightsaber that {{w|Darth Vader|Anakin Skywalker}} made and used (which Luke also used when he was a new Jedi) for the first two movies of the sequel trilogy, and so it would be thematically appropriate for her to build her own prior to the trilogy's final entry. Most Jedi's lightsabers are either blue or green, with a few notable exceptions (e.g. {{w|Mace Windu}}'s purple lightsaber signifies his incredible combat prowess). Kyber crystals are aligned with the Light Side of {{w|the Force}}, so {{w|Sith}} must overpower and "bleed" their crystals before they will function for them, which causes their distinctive red color. Having a lightsaber of a color other than blue, green, or red is often seen in the ''Star Wars'' fandom as a sign of being a "[https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MarySue Mary Sue]", which is an accusation which has been made of Rey.

Another common plot point in ''Star Wars'' media is the construction, use, and destruction of a superweapon. These are inspired by stories and media of World War II, in which militaries sought to find, attack, and destroy critical elements of their enemies' resources and infrastructure, and meanwhile would construct elaborate defenses for themselves. The attack on the {{w|Death Star}} in particular is inspired by {{w|Operation Chastise}}, the "bouncing bomb" attack on Germany's hydroelectric power plants; Operation Chastise was dramatised in the {{w|The Dam Busters (book)|1951 book}} and {{w|The Dam Busters (film)|1955 film}} ''The Dam Busters'', which was [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lNdb03Hw18M very thoroughly homaged] by ''A New Hope''. The original trilogy of movies only had two Death Stars, but superweapons quickly became a staple of the {{w|Star Wars expanded to other media|Expanded Universe}} fiction, to the point that one book had {{w|Han Solo}} make fun of the Empire's tendency towards building superweapons, proposing such ridiculous names as "Galaxy Destructor" and "Nostril of Palpatine". Superweapons are common in superhero stories.

Redemption and making allies of old enemies is also a common plot point in ''Star Wars''. Anakin Skywalker fell to the Dark Side and became Darth Vader, but eventually returned to the Light Side to protect his son, and Han Solo was initially a morally ambiguous character who was eventually convinced to join the Rebellion.

Rey, one of the main characters in the sequel trilogy series is an orphan, who was left behind on the planet Jakku as a child. As Rey is Force-sensitive and adept at using a lightsaber, there is much speculation among Star Wars fans as to the identity of her parents. Many major characters in ''Star Wars'' have unexpected heritages of great portent, most famously Luke, who was very distressed to learn that Darth Vader did not ''kill'' his father, as Obi-Wan had told him, but ''is'' his father. In ''{{w|Star Wars: The Last Jedi}}'', villain {{w|Kylo Ren}} tells her that she is the child of "filthy junk traders", but many fans speculate that he was lying to her.

The title text refers to the bottom option of the [strange event in battle] section. Apparently Lord Juul (or Darth Juul) is fighting the heroes in the Sith car wash. It is unclear what "flipping the switch" from Regular to Premium would do, but it seems to be beneficial to Darth Juul. A "premium" car wash usually has more features than a regular car wash, e.g. more cleaning brushes, waxing the car, cleaning the tires, etc.

This is the second false fact generating comic, after [[1930: Calendar Facts]].

==Table==
{| class="wikitable"
! Entry
! Explanation
|-
! colspan="2" | New villain
|-
| Kyle Ren
|Kyle Ren is one letter away from {{w|Kylo Ren|''Kylo'' Ren}}, the adopted "Sith name" of Ben Solo, son of Han and Leia Solo. Kylo is one of the antagonists of the first two movies in the sequel trilogy, and presumably will be so in the third, but there's nobody in the films named "Kyle". (There are a handful of ''Legends'' characters named Kyle, most famously Kyle Katarn, protagonist of the ''Star Wars: Jedi Knight'' video game series.)
|-
| {{w|Malloc}}
| Malloc is a function used in the C programming language to allocate more memory in the running of a program. Malloc may sound similar to {{w|Darth Malak|Malak}}, the antagonist of the ''{{w|Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic}}'' video game. Improper use of the malloc and free functions can cause "memory leak" bugs in programs.
|-
|Darth Sebelius
| {{w|Sebelius}} is the last name of several people.
* {{w|Kathleen Sebelius}} is a former state representative and governor of Kansas who was Secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services under President Obama. Sebelius was the named party in a {{w|National Federation of Independent Business v. Sebelius|Supreme Court case}} that upheld the provisions of the {{w|Affordable Care Act}} ("Obamacare"). The naming of Sebelius as a villain may reference the fact that the ACA has been controversial among certain groups.
* {{w|Jean Sibelius}} is a reknowned Finnish composer. {{w|Sibelius (scorewriter)|Sibelius}} is also the name of a piece of music software.
Randall may have chosen this surname as it sounds similar to {{w|Darth Sidious}}, the overarching villain in the first 6 Star Wars films, who is rumored to return in the upcoming film.
|-
|{{w|Theranos}}
|Theranos was a medical technology company founded by {{w|Elizabeth Holmes}} which claimed to have developed revolutionary blood tests that could produce more data from limited volumes of blood than ever before. They were eventually found to have engaged in fraudulent activity, having tricked investors into thinking their technology was performing better than it actually was or ever could, which resulted in fines for Holmes and Theranos president {{w|Ramesh Balwani}} and the bankruptcy of Theranos. Theranos also sounds similar to {{w|Thanos}}, the main villain of the Infinity Saga in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
|-
|Lord Juul
|{{w|Juul}} is a brand of e-cigarettes. In addition to the broader controversy surrounding electronic cigarettes, Juul has been investigated for its sale of flavored additives for their cigarettes, which are alleged to be particularly attractive to minors. Juul is reminiscent of the "uu" in the names for clones {{w|Joruus C'baoth}} and {{w|Luuke Skywalker}} in {{w|Star Wars Legends|''Star Wars'' Legends}} stories, thus implying Lord Juul is a clone of a character named Jul. ''{{w|Yule|Jul}}'' is the Scandinavian name for the midwinter holidays, which fits as the comic appeared within the Yule season of 2019.
|-
! colspan="2" | New friend
|-
| Kim Spacemeasurer
| May be a parody of the name {{w|Luke Skywalker}}, one of the main characters in the original trilogy of films. Other "Nounverber" names in ''Star Wars'' include Starkiller, Luke's original last name which was later applied to Starkiller Base in ''The Force Awakens'', and Biggs Darklighter, Luke's childhood friend and fellow Rebel pilot who died in the attack on the original Death Star. Also note another Star Wars comic posted a few weeks before this one, [[2229: Rey and Kylo]], which shows those characters actually deciding to measure properties of space.
|-
|Teen Yoda
|{{w|The Child (Star Wars character)|The Child}}, commonly called "Baby Yoda" by fans and the media, is a breakout character from the Disney+ series ''{{w|The Mandalorian}}''. Randall envisions a "teenage" version of this character teaming up with the main characters. This may be in analogy to Groot in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, who appeared as an adult, then child, then teen, or other adaptations of original characters like the Teen Titans.
|-
|Dab Tweetdeck
| A {{w|Dab (dance)|dab}} is a dance move which is many decades old but was made popular by that name in the late 2010's. {{w|TweetDeck}} is an application for managing Twitter accounts. Taken together, "Dab Tweetdeck" could be a character name proposed by clueless Disney executives to attract "the kids" to see ''The Rise of Skywalker'', although one would think that this name would be heavily promoted and thus not a spoiler in that case.
Tweetdeck sounds similar to twi'lek, one of the humanoid alien races in Star Wars, who often are employed as dancers.
|-
| Yaz Progestin
| Yaz sounds like the first name of {{w|Maz Kanata}}, a supporting protagonist in the sequel trilogy. Yaz is a medication which contains {{w|Progestin}}, which imitates the effects of {{w|progesterone}}, a female sex hormone. It is used for purposes including birth control and acne treatment.
|-
| TI-83
| Droids in the Star Wars universe typically have names with letters and numbers, such as R2-D2, C-3PO, BB-8, etc. Randall has created a new character called "TI-83". In real life, the {{w|TI-83}} is a model of graphing calculator manufactured by {{w|Texas Instruments}} that is commonly used in American high schools. This mirrors the origin of the name "R2-D2", which was inspired when Lucas was working on ''{{w|American Graffiti}}'' and was asked for Reel 2, Dialog Track 2, which was abbreviated "R-2-D-2". He remarked that it would be a "great name" and included it in his then-in-development script for ''Star Wars''.
|-
! colspan="2" | Lightsaber colors
|-
| [beige/ochre/mauve/aquamarine/taupe]
| These are different colors, none of which is a "traditional" color for a lightsaber. {{w|Beige}} is a pale-grayish yellow. {{w|Ochre}} is a clay earth pigment ranging from yellow to deep orange or brown. {{w|Mauve}} is a pale purple color. A purple color has been used for a lightsaber in the prequel trilogy series, by Jedi Master {{w|Mace Windu}}. {{w|Aquamarine (color)|Aquamarine}} is a blueish green color. {{w|Taupe}} is a dark brown color between brown and gray.
|-
! colspan="2" | Superweapon names
|-
|Sun Obliterator
| There was an Expanded Universe superweapon called the "Sun Crusher", which would infiltrate a star system and shoot a special torpedo into the star to make it go supernova. May also be a reference to one of the doodles from What If?.
|-
|Moonsquisher
| There were no ''Star Wars'' superweapons with the word "Moon" in their title (or "squisher"), but in the no-longer-canon ''New Jedi Order'' series, Chewbacca was squished ''by'' a moon that was intentionally de-orbited by invading Yuuzhan Vong.
|-
|World Eater
| Possibly a reference to {{w|Alduin}}, the main villain of the popular game {{w|The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim}}. In the Expanded Universe, the Empire used World Devastators, massive machines that would strip-mine planets with tractor beams and make weapons and spacecraft from the extracted resources. Another possible reference is to the {{w|The_Doomsday_Machine_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|Planet Eater}} doomsday machine from the original Star Trek series. A further possible reference is to the World Eaters space marine legion from {{Warhammer 40,000}}.
|-
|Planet Zester
| A {{w|zester}} is a cooking tool for zesting citrus fruit, that is, scraping off the outer layer of a citrus fruit to obtain the flavorful outer layer of its skin. Zesting a planet would be devastating to anything built or living on its surface.
|-
|Superconducting supercollider
| A {{w|supercollider}}, or particle accelerator, is a machine used to accelerate charged particles to very high speeds, for testing in particle physics. The {{w|Superconducting Super Collider}} was a proposed accelerator which was to be constructed in Texas, but was cancelled partway through construction. There has been some minor controversy over the {{w|safety of high-energy particle collision experiments}}, which could theoretically produce black holes, {{w|strangelets}}, or other doomsday scenarios, but all scientific examination of the energies involved has shown that all currently-existing and planned particle accelerators pose no threats. So far, the Earth has not been destroyed by any particle accelerator.{{Citation needed}}
|-
! colspan="2" | Station capabilities
|-
|blowing up a planet with a bunch of beams of energy that combine into one
|This is how the {{w|Death Star}} was depicted in ''{{w|Star Wars: A New Hope}}''. Many beams converged together to form one energy beam. The superweapon was used to destroy the planet Alderaan, as a way to intimidate Princess Leia.
|-
|blowing up a bunch of planets with one beam of energy that splits into many
|This is how the superweapon on Starkiller Base was depicted in ''{{w|Star Wars: The Force Awakens}}''. A single energy beam split into several beams, allowing it to attack many planets. The superweapon was used to destroy the planets in the Hosnian system, the headquarters of the New Republic.
|-
|cutting a planet in half and smashing the halves together like two cymbals
|Jango Fett's "seismic charge" weapon, which he used in a dogfight against Obi-Wan Kenobi in ''Attack of the Clones'', produced a plane wave that cut asteroids in half; presumably a larger weapon of this kind could do the same to a planet.
|-
|increasing the CO2 levels in a planet's atmosphere, causing rapid heating
|This is a reference to {{w|climate change}} currently occurring on planet Earth which most {{w|Scientific consensus on climate change|climate scientists}} believe is due mainly to human factors such as the burning of fossil fuels releasing ancient carbon sources into the air as carbon dioxide, and mass deforestation which means trees are not converting the carbon dioxide into sugars and collagen. [http://drroyspencer.com/ Few other climate scientists] believe the fraction of warming attributable to humans to be uncertain, and probably largely benign, and that recent warming might well be mostly natural.
This seems to have occurred on the planet {{w|Venus}}. Venus' atmosphere is 97% carbon dioxide, and it is also the hottest planet in the Solar System, due to a greenhouse effect, preventing the planet from cooling.
|-
|triggering the end credits before the movie is done
|The {{w|closing credits}} or end credits of a film is the list of cast and crew who were involved in the making of the film. It would be quite strange to show the end credits of the film before it has concluded, although it is one of the [https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CreditsGag types of credits gag] used in other media. This entry is considerably less damaging to a planet{{Citation needed}} than the other 4 entries in this section, but if early audiences are left unsatisfied by the movie, they might tell everyone else not to see it, which would put the ''Star Wars'' franchise in a perilous financial situation. This would negatively impact the villains as well as the heroes, but they might consider this a worthwhile trade if it is their best option at harming the heroes. This option may be a reference to exploiting a glitch to trigger a [https://youtu.be/Jf9i7MjViCE credit warp] in games such as Super Mario World. This may also be a reference to the Netflix interactive movie "Bandersnatch" in which certain choices triggered the end of the movie and caused it to start the credits.
|-
! colspan="2" | Old enemy/new friend
|-
|{{w|Boba Fett}}
| Boba Fett is a famous bounty hunter introduced in the ''{{w|Star Wars Holiday Special}}'' and made popular by ''{{w|The Empire Strikes Back}}''. On the Empire's orders, he helped capture Han Solo as part of a plot to capture Luke Skywalker. He later tried to prevent Luke from rescuing Han, but was knocked into a sarlacc pit, where he was presumed eaten. In the Expanded Universe, he survived and did eventually join the protagonists against extragalactic invaders; his survival has not been confirmed by Disney's new canon, but he would be a plausible character to bring back in ''The Rise of Skywalker''. A Mandalorian (not Boba Fett, but a bounty hunter using body-armour  from the same planet) is featured in the new Disney+ series, ''The Mandalorian''.
|-
|[https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Salacious_B._Crumb Salacious Crumb]
| Salacious B. Crumb is a Kowakian monkey-lizard who was Jabba the Hutt's jester. He wasn't exactly a major adversary, but he did pull one of C-3PO's eyes out. He was last seen on Jabba the Hutt's sail barge, which was made to explode after Han, Luke, and the rest of the heroes escaped from it, and is presumed dead.
|-
|[https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Exogorth The Space Slug]
| In ''The Empire Strikes Back'', Han Solo pilots the Millennium Falcon into a giant cave to evade pursuit and get time to effect repairs. He is interrupted when the cave turns out to be the mouth of a giant space slug, which the Falcon barely escapes. A giant space slug might be a powerful ally in a battle against a giant space station.
|-
|The bottom half of {{w|Darth Maul}}
| Darth Maul was cut in half by Obi-Wan Kenobi at the end of ''The Phantom Menace''. His "upper half", attached to mechanical legs, has returned as a villain in the ''Clone Wars'' TV series and ''{{w|Solo: A Star Wars Story|Solo}}''. Given that Maul was a Sith and Kenobi a Jedi, who trained Luke, who trained Rey, it would be extremely unexpected for his "bottom half" to join forces with the heroes, although presumably his bottom half would have to be attached to something, which might be better disposed towards Jedi.
If Darth Maul's bottom half did join the heroes, they might aid the heroes by using [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Force_kick force kicks].
|-
|YouTube commenters
| The sequel trilogy has received more mixed reviews from watchers than Disney might like, and many vocal non-fans have taken to commenting on YouTube (via videos and comments) on what they don't like about the new movies and new characters. If ''The Rise of Skywalker'' fully wins the crowd, an alliance between the heroes and their former critics would be extremely powerful, but with Rotten Tomatoes showing a critics' aggregate score of [https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/star_wars_the_rise_of_skywalker/ less than 60%] ("rotten"), it's going to be an uphill battle.
|-
! colspan="2" | Battle feature
|-
|a bow that shoots little lightsaber-headed arrows
|May be a reference to the [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Bowcaster bowcaster], a laser crossbow weapon used by the Wookie {{w|Chewbacca}}. It is unclear if the lightsaber-headed arrows are actually lightsabers in itself, as they would seem difficult to produce (as opposed to the Death Star, or even a bunch of sword versions of the arrow).
|-
|X-Wings and TIE fighters dodging the giant letters of the opening crawl
| The {{w|Star Wars opening crawl|"opening crawl"}} is a signature motif used in all the main Star Wars films, to explain the backstory and context of each film. {{w|X-Wing}}s and {{w|TIE fighter}}s are fighter-type spaceships used by the Rebels (and Resistance later on) and the Empire (and First Order), respectively. A dogfight scene during the opening crawl would involve {{w|Fourth wall|breaking the fourth wall}}, as the opening crawl is not presumed to be part of the universe of the films (except when so parodied, such as in {{w|Airplane II: The Sequel}}).
|-
|a Sith educational display that uses Force lightning to demonstrate the dielectric breakdown of air
|[https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Force_lightning Force lightning] is a power that Force users can use to generate electric energy from the user's hands. It was first used in ''Return of the Jedi'' by Emperor Palpatine (Darth Sidious) when Luke Skywalker refuses to give in to the dark side of the Force. Palpatine attempts to kill Luke with Force lightning, but Darth Vader saves Luke by throwing Palpatine down a reactor chute. Palpatine also used Force Lightning on Mace Windu and Yoda during their battles at the end of ''Revenge of the Sith''. None of these uses of Sith lightning were intended to be educational on the nature of {{w|lightning}}, although they could have been very educational on the pain, cruelty, and "unlimited power!" offered by the Dark Side of the Force. This might also be a reference to [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Sith_holocron sith holocron] — a device to store Force-related information and secrets, possibly.
|-
|Kylo Ren putting on another helmet over his smaller one
|Kylo Ren is famous for wearing his helmet in ''The Force Awakens'', which he styled after Darth Vader's helmet. Putting on another helmet over it would require a comically large helmet that might be compared to Dark Helmet, a character from the parody film ''{{w|Spaceballs}}'' who parodies Darth Vader.
|-
|a Sith car wash where the bristles on the brushes are little lightsabers
| While an unexpected car wash finale scene seems unlikely, it is not without precedent in cinema; ''[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adolescence_of_Utena Adolescence of Utena]'' featured the title character unexpectedly entering a car wash and transforming into a car (followed by a segue into a car race sequence).
George Lucas, the originator of Star Wars also wrote the movie "American Graffiti," which featured cars prominently. A subsequent movie "Car Wash," has been seen as a commentary on or imitation of "American Graffiti." Including a Sith car wash might reference the relation between these two films.[https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/25/movies/streaming-car-wash.html ‘Car Wash,’ a Raunchy 1970s Comedy Brimming With Meta and Mayhem].
|-
! colspan="2" | Rey's parent #1
|-
| {{w|Luke Skywalker|Luke}}
| Luke Skywalker is the main character of the original Star Wars films. Of all of the characters presented here, he is the one with the greatest likelihood of being Rey's father. When Maz gave Rey Luke's lightsaber, she said "[t]hat lightsaber was Luke's, and his father's before him, and now, it calls to you." Luke does not seem to recognize Rey as his child (or as anybody in particular), but Darth Vader did not recognize Luke or Leia as his children -- and indeed did not know that he had any living children -- until they were grown. However, unlike Anakin Skywalker, or the Luke Skywalker from the pre-Disney Expanded Universe, no canon materials have presented anyone with whom Luke has fallen in love or fathered a child.
|-
|{{w|Princess Leia|Leia}} and {{w|Han Solo|Han}}
|Princess Leia and Han Solo are the other main characters of the original Star Wars films. It is unlikely that Leia or Han are Rey's parents as they did not seem to recognize Rey in any of the sequel trilogy films, nor is there any indication that they have had more than one child (Ben Solo, AKA Kylo Ren).
|-
|{{w|Obi-Wan Kenobi|Obi-Wan}}
|Obi-Wan Kenobi was one of the main characters in the Star Wars prequel trilogy. He, along with Qui-Gon Jinn, discovered Anakin Skywalker, who later became Darth Vader. Kenobi dies at the second act of ''Star Wars: A New Hope'', sacrificing himself to allow Luke, Leia, and Han to escape the Death Star. Marriage and parenthood were forbidden by the Jedi Order, and Obi-Wan generally adhered to the Order's rules more closely than Anakin did; Obi-Wan did feel some mutual romantic attraction with Duchess Satine of Mandalore, but they both chose to remain in their respective organizations rather than pursue a relationship. Also, Obi-Wan stopped having a physical form decade before Rey was conceived.
|-
|a random junk trader
|This is who Kylo Ren claims that Rey is descended from: worthless, random junk traders.
|-
! colspan="2" | Rey's parent #2
|-
|{{w|Poe Dameron|Poe}}
|Poe Dameron is one of the main characters of the Star Wars sequel trilogy. He is a pilot in the Resistance. He is only 13 years older than Rey, and thus is most likely not her father.
|-
|{{w|BB-8}}
|BB-8 is an astromech droid owned by Poe Dameron. It is unlikely that Rey is descended from a (non-living) droid.
|-
|[ {{w|Amilyn Holdo}} /Laura Dern]
|Vice Admiral Amilyn Holdo, portrayed by Laura Dern, was a leader in the Resistance. She dies at the end of ''The Last Jedi'', sacrificing herself by jumping to light speed straight into the First Order's pursuing starship. Randall presents both Admiral Holdo, the character, and Laura Dern, the actress, as separate options for Rey's mother, but the former is not supported by any story material and the latter is impossible (Dern is alive here and now, not "a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away").
|-
|a random junk trader
| (see above)
|-
|that one droid from the Jawa Sandcrawler that says ''Gonk''
|This is [https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/GNK_power_droid a droid] from ''Star Wars: A New Hope'' that says "Gonk". As in the BB-8 entry, it is unlikely that Rey is descended from a droid.
|-
|}

==Transcript==
:<big>Star Wars Spoiler Generator</big>

:[Shown below is a branching flowchart of sorts that begins at the phrase "In this Star Wars movie, our heroes return to take on the First Order and new villain...", then flows through various paths to build up a story.]

:In this Star Wars movie, our heroes return to take on the First Order and new villain...
::Kyle Ren
::Malloc
::Darth Sebelius
::Theranos
::Lord Juul

:...with help from their new friend...
::Kim Spacemeasurer
::Teen Yoda
::Dab Tweetdeck
::Yaz Progestin
::TI-83

:Rey builds a new lightsaber with a...
::beige
::ochre
::mauve
::aquamarine
::taupe

:...blade, and they head out to confront the First Order's new superweapon, the...
::Sun Obliterator
::Moonsquisher
::World Eater
::Planet Zester
::Superconducting Supercollider

:...a space station capable of...
::blowing up a planet with a bunch of beams of energy that combine into one
::blowing up a bunch of planets with one beam of energy that splits into many
::cutting a planet in half and smashing the halves together like two cymbals
::increasing the CO2 levels in a planet's atmosphere, causing rapid heating
::triggering the end credits before the movie is done

:They unexpectedly join forces with their old enemy...
::Boba Fett
::Salacious Crumb
::The Space Slug
::the bottom half of Darth Maul
::Youtube commenters

:...and destroy the superweapon in a battle featuring
::a bow that shoots little lightsaber-headed arrows
::X-Wings and TIE fighters dodging the giant letters of the opening crawl
::a Sith educational display that uses Force Lightning to demonstrate the dielectric breakdown of air
::Kylo Ren putting on another helmet over his smaller one
::a Sith car wash where the bristles on the brushes are little lightsabers

:P.S. Rey's parents are...
::Luke
::Leia
::Han
::Obi-Wan
::a random junk trader

:...and...
::Poe
::BB-8
::Amilyn Holdo
::Laura Dern
::a random junk trader
::that one droid from the Jawa Sandcrawler that says ''Gonk''

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]] 
[[Category:Programming]]

2251: Alignment Chart Alignment Chart

2020-01-06T16:39:50Z

173.245.52.97: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2251
| date = January 6, 2020
| title = Alignment Chart Alignment Chart
| image = alignment_chart_alignment_chart.png
| titletext = I would describe my personal alignment as "lawful heterozygous silty liquid."
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Created using the [[User:DgbrtBOT|BOT template]]. Needs explanations of each alignment chart, and probably some editing for clarity.}}

"Alignment" and "alignment charts" come from the the tabletop game ''{{w|Dungeons & Dragons}}''. Every character has an {{w|Alignment (Dungeons & Dragons)|alignment}}, which is a sort of a personality archetype or general description of morality. The most widely used alignment system was introduced in the ''{{w|Dungeons & Dragons Basic Set}}'' in 1977 and has been reused in many (but not all) subsequent editions of the game. This system uses two perpendicular axes, each axis having three words; the alignment of a particular character is a combination of one word from each axis (for a total of nine categories). The two axes are:
* Lawful/neutral/chaotic: this axis says whether a character is strongly devoted to, indifferent about, or categorically opposed to following the rule of the law.
* Good/neutral/evil: this axis says whether a character is generally inclined to commit good deeds or evil deeds.
For example, a character's alignment can be "chaotic neutral". It means that they don't care about the existing order of the world, what is good and what is evil, what is allowed and what is prohibited. They're very prone to acting on emotions, and their actions often seem to be lacking rhyme or reason. There are nine possible alignments - any combination of the two axes is allowed. A character with the "neutral neutral" alignment is called a true neutral.

The use of the term chaotic in a personality alignment context is different to the term in a physics concept. In physics, {{w|chaos theory|chaos}} refers to unpredictable outcomes following emergent behaviours that are sensitive to small changes in underlying conditions. Similarly, lawful can be considered to follow deterministic physical behaviours. Hitting pool balls with a pool cue is deterministic, it follows the deterministic Newtonian laws of motion. Hitting your opponent with a pool cue is chaotic, the end state of the ensuing brawl is unpredictable.

An alignment chart is a grid that divides the alignments, usually for the purpose of putting descriptions or particular characters on it. Alignment charts are frequently used as a [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/mcdonalds-alignment-chart meme template], where humorous or absurdist things are organized into different alignments. In addition to the "classic" Dungeons and Dragons alignment chart, there are a number of variant alignment charts in use as meme templates. Many keep the three-by-three grid structure but replace the lawful-neutral-chaotic and good-neutral-evil axes with others, such as [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/gay-bi-lesbian-distinguished-functional-disaster distinguished-functional-disaster vs. gay-bi-lesbian] and [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/edgy-depressed-dumbass-bitch-thot-bastard edgy-depressed-dumbass vs. bitch-thot-bastard]. Some alignment charts use other systems of classification, like the [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/mcdonalds-alignment-chart McDonald's alignment chart], which is a {{w|Ternary_plot|ternary diagram}}, a way of plotting data points by the relative proportions of three components in them on a triangular plot.

This comic claims to be a meta-alignment chart, where nine "alignment charts" are themselves sorted into the nine Dungeons and Dragons alignments, following the use of alignment charts to humorously classify abstract concepts. However, these "alignment charts" are mostly diagrams used in academic classifications, which are being treated as if they were blank meme templates. There are two levels of absurdity here: first, the idea of using these technical scientific diagrams to classify things they were never intended to, like fictional characters or how people bag their bread, and second, the conflation of chaos as a physics concept and an assigned moral weights as it applies to each of these classification systems.

{| class="wikitable"
!Alignment
!Chart
!Explanation
|-
|Lawful Good
|{{w|Soil texture|Soil chart}}
|This chart shows the USDA classification of soil types by their relative proportions of sand, clay and silt. The chart is a ternary diagram (very common in geology), so soils with more clay plot towards the upper corner, soils with more sand to the bottom left, and soils with more silt to the bottom right. This chart has been used humorously as an alignment chart ([https://www.reddit.com/r/PrequelMemes/comments/8wakd4/anakin_soil_reference_chart/ for example]) and may have been the inspiration for Randall to use scientific diagrams as alignment charts. In addition to being Lawful Good, this grid cell is also the upper left cell of the chart and will be read first, making it a good place to put this chart as a "jumping off point".
|-
|Neutral Good
|{{w|Punnett square}}
| (quote from wikipedia article, but should have been obvious. Oh, yeah - we're all tech nerds, not biologists!) "The Punnett square is a square diagram that is used to predict the genotypes of a particular cross or breeding experiment. It is named after Reginald C. Punnett, who devised the approach. The diagram is used by biologists to determine the probability of an offspring having a particular genotype. The Punnett square is a tabular summary of possible combinations of maternal alleles with paternal alleles.[1] These tables can be used to examine the genotypical outcome probabilities of the offspring of a single trait (allele), or when crossing multiple traits from the parents. The Punnett square is a visual representation of Mendelian inheritance. It is important to understand the terms "heterozygous", "homozygous" …” These refer to the pairs of alleles in an organism’s genotype, indicating mixed or same alleles, respectively. Randall later uses “heterozygous” in the title text. Note that it is possible for a phenotype to be expressed the same between some heterozygotes and homozygotes, e.g., persons with genotypes heterozygous ”Ao” and homozygous “AA” will both express blood type A.
So, the Punnett Square is a good chart because it is both a simple and true geometric predictor of inheritance, but it tends to neutral because of complicating factors such as polygenic inheritance; these and other factors will cause genotypic frequency to deviate from expected 1:2:1 patterns.
|
|-
|Chaotic Good
|{{w|IPA vowel chart with audio|IPA vowel chart }}
|This chart shows the relationship between different vowels according to the {{w|International Phonetic Alphabet}}. As different vowel sounds are created by changes in different parts of the mouth, it can be considered chaotic.
|-
|Lawful Neutral
|Phase diagram
|A {{w|phase diagram}} shows the temperature and pressure points where a material changes phase. The diagram included is the phase diagram for water, which exists in three phases (ice, liquid water, steam) depending on its temperature and pressure. Phase diagrams are useful as the relationship is not always linear. For example, the air pressure of Mars is such that there is no temperature at which liquid water can exist. Water exists as ice until the temperature reaches a point where it sublimates directly into steam.

Phase diagrams follow the laws of physics, so are inherently lawful.
|-
|True Neutral
|Alignment chart
|All alignment charts are neutral unless humans contaminate them.
|-
|Chaotic Neutral
|CIE chromacity diagram
|The {{w|chromacity}} diagram is typically used to help determine a color temperature given the typical RGB intensities of light. Low color temperatures tend to be associated with 'softer' lights that are easier on the eyes, whereas 'higher' color temperatures are associated with 'harder' light that are perceived as brighter. Given that color temperature as defined by the chromacity diagram has nothing to do with the actual color temperature of a blackbody as defined by Physics, it is chaotic. Also, the official specification for CIE is behind a paywall and defined by private organizations, making it more chaotic.
|
|-
|Lawful Evil
|Political compass
|Political Compass [https://www.politicalcompass.org/] separates out left-right thinking into economic and social political thought. For example, Gandhi and Stalin supposedly both had similar economic perspectives (collectivist) but radically different social perspectives (authoritarian vs libertarian).

As politicians make the laws, this is inherently lawful. Attempting to represent all politics in terms of two very general axes is a gross oversimplification, which is likely why it is listed as evil.

Like the USDA soil chart, the political compass has actually been [https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/political-compass used as an alignment chart], largely as a mockery of it.
|-
|Neutral Evil
|{{w|QAPF diagram|QAPF rock diagram}}
|This diagram is used to classify coarse-grained felsic (low magnesium and iron) igneous rocks by the relative volumes of the minerals quartz, alkali feldspars, plagioclase feldspars, and feldspathoids in the rock. It consists of two ternary diagrams - quartz and feldspathoid minerals cannot coexist (they will react to form feldspars) so only three of these components will be in any given rock. Rocks in the upper triangle of the diagram contain quartz, with rocks with more quartz plotting closer to the top, while rocks in the lower triangle contain feldspathoids, with rocks with more feldspathoids plotting lower. Rocks closer to the left corner of the diagram contain more alkali feldspar and rocks closer to the right corner contain more plagioclase feldspar. The field on the diagram for granite is labeled in the comic, but each area outlined on the diagram has it's own rock name (monzonite, syenite, granodiorite, etc.). All the rocks that the QAPF diagram is used to classify look superficially like granite, but their chemistry, mineralogy, and origin differ.
The QAPF diagram and the names of the more obscure rock types on it can be somewhat arcane, which may be why it is considered evil here.
|-
|Chaotic Evil
|Omnispace classifier
|The other eight diagrams shown in this comic, squished together into one, with the shapes of the diagrams corresponding to those of the originals. Probably self-referential humour, in that the diagram created for this comic is considered to be chaotically evil.
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}

{{comic discussion}}



[[Category:Charts]]

2017: Stargazing 2

2018-07-11T13:41:06Z

173.245.52.97: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 2017
| date = July 9, 2018
| title = Stargazing 2
| image = stargazing_2.png
| titletext = I mean, it wasn't exactly MY thesis. When the FAA came to shut down our observatory for using the telescope mirror to shine light at airplanes, I took a thesis and a bunch of doctorates from the supply cabinet on my way out.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|More on 3rd panel with planet and a satellite. More on last sentence and the entire title text. Do NOT delete this tag too soon.}}
This is the second comic in the [[:Category:Stargazing|Stargazing]] series: The first was [[1644: Stargazing]], two and a half years earlier.

This comic continues with the male TV host mixing accurate astronomical information with trivialities, as well as utterly bizarre statements. In the first panel, the host voices surprise that the stars are visible again after disappearing during daylight. (See the explanation of the first comic in the series, for why this is certainly a male host, as the comics are probably spoofing {{w|Brian Cox (physicist)|Brian Cox}} who is one of the hosts on {{w|Stargazing Live}}. As can be seen he would end up looking like [[Megan]] in xkcd style).

The host mentions three stars in a constellation which he says is called The Triangle. This presumably refers to the {{w|Triangulum}} constellation. He then goes on to point out three other stars forming a triangle and concludes that one can form lots of triangles by connecting groups of three stars. In Euclidean and non-Euclidean geometry, any set of three points which do not form a line will form a triangle, so to say that there are a "lotta triangles" is both trivial and an understatement.

Then he points to planets, calling them dots known as "fool's stars" (like fool's gold). This is understandable as planets such as Venus and Jupiter are often mistaken as stars. He also notes that lacking interstellar transportation, humanity will likely only reach the planets within our solar system. However, he then makes the ludicrous assertion that humans will turn these planets into interplanetary landfills.

The host also notices a dot of "space trash": An artificial satellite. Since the nascent Space Age, the Earth's orbit has gradually accumulated artificial materials that include satellites, spent rockets, and space stations. There are concerns such debris accumulation will increasingly imperil current and future space projects. However, the host claims there is an app that can tell you whose fault it is- not necessarily on this satellite, more likely elsewhere, which can inform you who launched a given satellite.

The host eventually goes off on a tangent when someone from the audience points out something blinking in the sky. The host says it is a plane, and tells them what is inside it. The host continues, "don't bother trying to catch that one." This could be understood as he means it's too hard to point the telescope at it properly because it is moving too fast. In the title text, however, he means this literally, revealing that at one point during his studies he apparently used the reflective mirror of a telescope to shine light directly at airplanes, which caused the {{w|Federal Aviation Administration}} (FAA) to close down the observatory. He claims it was worth getting shutdown by the FAA because he got completed his graduate thesis degree.

In the title text, he clarifies that as he was exiting the observatory, he stole someone else's thesis and doctorate to fraudulently claim them as his own accomplishments. The revelations that he's extremely unqualified (and unethical) would explain his many bizarre and incorrect statements.

==Transcript==
:[In a dark panel, a male TV host is standing in front of a group of 5 people: two Cueballs, Ponytail, Hairbun and Megan.]
:Host: Welcome back to stargazing.
:Host: When the stars disappeared this morning, I figured I had to find a new job, but they're ''back!'' This ''rules!''

:[A frame-less white panel in which the host points to the upper right with Megan, ponytail and Cueball looking in that direction.]
:Host: Those three stars form a constellation called the triangle.
:Host: Those three are another triangle.
:Host: Lotta triangles. Very important shape.

:[Back to a dark panel with the host now pointing to the upper left in a close-up.]
:Host: Those dots are planets, or "fool's stars." Without interstellar travel, they're the only ones we can realistically hope to dump trash on.
:Host: Speaking of space trash, that dot is a satellite. There are apps that will tell you whose fault it is.

:[The host is now turned right not pointing, still in a close-up.]
:Off-panel voice: What's that blinking one?
:Host: Airplane. They're full of snacks and money and stuff, but don't bother trying to catch them- they're ''way'' too high up.
:Host: Learned that the hard way in grad school.
:Host: Got a thesis out of it, at least.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Stargazing|Stargazing]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Stargazing]]
[[Category:Comics with inverted brightness]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]] 
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]

Talk:2012: Thorough Analysis

2018-06-28T16:26:50Z

173.245.52.97:

I started the explanation. Things that need investigation: Is this an actual scientific paper somewhere? Can anyone find the original source? If not, perhaps still based on real events? [[User:PotatoGod|PotatoGod]] ([[User talk:PotatoGod|talk]]) 18:06, 27 June 2018 (UTC)
:The earthquake was a real event: https://earthquake.usgs.gov/earthquakes/events/1811-1812newmadrid/summary.php & https://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-great-midwest-earthquake-of-1811-46342/ (this one mentions the church bells) [[Special:Contributions/162.158.63.130|162.158.63.130]] 18:15, 27 June 2018 (UTC)david0mp
::A quick search of Google scholar doesn't turn up anything close to this paper. Tried various combinations of New Madrid Earthquake, Bell, Church, etc. [[User:Cgrimes85|Cgrimes85]] ([[User talk:Cgrimes85|talk]]) 19:47, 27 June 2018 (UTC)

Maybe its ‘cause I’m dumb, but I originally interpreted the caption as meaning that these papers investigated minor details *about* the thoroughness of the 9/11 commission’s report. As in, the 9/11 commission mentioned this bell tower somewhere, and this report is debunking it. The explanation on here should probably make clear what the intended meaning is. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.47.162|172.68.47.162]] 19:08, 27 June 2018 (UTC)

It looks like this paper covers the earthquake and church bells (https://agupubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/pdf/10.1029/2000JB900110), but the church bell mentioned is in Georgia and not South Carolina. Close enough I guess? [[Special:Contributions/172.68.54.10|172.68.54.10]] 19:34, 27 June 2018 (UTC)

Wikipedia quotes the John Reynolds account suggesting a church bell was heard to ring in Cahokia, Illinois.
Interestingly New Madrid is in the Kentucky Bend exclave - which I assume would have been simplified when the border was straightened to fix survey errors. Unsigned

My favorite genre of [website] are exhaustive [1000]-page [wikis] that [explain] some minor [webcomic] with the obsessive thoroughness of the 9/11 commission report.
Is Randall trolling you guys? [[Special:Contributions/198.41.238.88|198.41.238.88]] 12:40, 28 June 2018 (UTC)
:I don't know, but it's a good one. [[User:DanB|DanB]] ([[User talk:DanB|talk]]) 14:12, 28 June 2018 (UTC)

Any utility in mentioning that while Charleston, SC is not in the New Madrid seismic zone, it had its own {{w|1886 Charleston earthquake|7.0-ish earthquake in 1886}}? [[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.97|173.245.52.97]] 16:26, 28 June 2018 (UTC)

Talk:2010: Update Notes

2018-06-22T18:21:31Z

173.245.52.97: maybe inspired by Paul Manafort foldering allegations?

[[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.46|108.162.216.46]] 16:42, 22 June 2018 (UTC)

I feel like this might be aimed at Google Hangouts. We started using it for our business several years ago, and every year it gets HARDER to use. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.90.22|172.68.90.22]] 16:43, 22 June 2018 (UTC) SiliconWolf

I wonder if this was inspired by [https://www.wsj.com/articles/foldering-in-the-manafort-case-an-old-spy-trick-enters-the-digital-age-1529678377 recent allegations about Paul Manafort using "foldering" for under-the-radar communication].
[[Special:Contributions/173.245.52.97|173.245.52.97]] 18:21, 22 June 2018 (UTC)