explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

Talk:Main Page

2015-04-15T13:42:33Z

173.245.56.202: /* Broken Date Box on comics */

{{notice|This page is for discussion of the [[Main Page]] itself. Other issues probably belong at the [[Explain XKCD:Community portal]].}}

As a new user, I think the first page is very important. So I thought why not begin a discussion here what to have on the first page every user visits.--[[User:Relic|Relic]] ([[User talk:Relic|talk]]) 05:59, 1 August 2012 (EDT) Re-signed here - b/c I broke the comment in two when I added the "List of comics" header. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 23:01, 2 August 2012 (EDT)

==List of comics==
I was thinking of having a quick link to the list of comics that is explained. Right know, it took me a while to even see any of them. Eventually I found the "List All Pages" (found it in Special pages) where I could find the comics that have been explained. What do you think?
:A category tag will do that for you automatically. Having a list of comics indexed by its number would be a little different.--[[User:Relic|Relic]] ([[User talk:Relic|talk]]) 05:59, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
::Sounds like a great list - I ''think'' it'd have to be manually maintained until/unless we get someone who knows how to make a bot update it. Categories will be useful, but they only work if someone added the category to the page in the first place. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 07:21, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::A (somewhat) related question - should [[:Category:Comics]] be sorted alphabetically or by comic number? --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 07:43, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
::::I think [[:Category:Comics]] should be sorted by comic number. If you are looking for a specific comic, you will use the search field. Is there a way to make that happen? --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 08:11, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::::They are two different functions. For the former, instead of adding <nowiki>[[Category:Comics]]</nowiki>, add, say, <nowiki>[[Category:Comics|1]]</nowiki>. For the second, we can create redirects. Normally, I'd say just make sure the search term was in the article text, but since numbers are going to be use for other purposes than just comic titles, it may be better to create [[1]] and [[Comic 1]] as redirects to the relevant articles right off the bat. --08:24, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
::::::We could also have a comic-list template on the Main Page, I suppose, or perhaps two - one for number and one for name? --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 08:54, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::::::Here's what I was thinking of for that: {{tl|Comics navbox}} Thoughts? ''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]]
:(outdent) It's ugly, but a sortable wikitable [[User:SurturZ/sandbox|(click here for example)]] could be used as a checklist to see what has been uploaded and what hasn't. What's the project namespace here, anyway (analogue of "WP:")? --[[User:SurturZ|SurturZ]] ([[User talk:SurturZ|talk]]) 03:04, 3 August 2012 (EDT)
:OK, I've found a way to get all the titles of the comics, so I was confident enough to create <big>[[Explain XKCD:Checklist]]</big> which can be used to fill in the gaps. --[[User:SurturZ|SurturZ]] ([[User talk:SurturZ|talk]]) 03:41, 3 August 2012 (EDT)
::I'm liking the checklist! That should do quite nicely as a "tool for editors". (I'm linking to it at the Community Portal). We still need the "template for readers." Did you think {{tl|Comics navbox}} was on the right track or should we do something else for that? --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 20:09, 3 August 2012 (EDT)
::Better idea - I'm throwing it directly onto the Main Page. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 20:10, 3 August 2012 (EDT)

==Admin list==
You can find a system-accurate list of admins [{{canonicalurl:Special:ListUsers|group=sysop}} here], so that might good to share, along with the manual list. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 07:13, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:Added to page. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 08:10, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
::That's exactly what I wanted, but couldn't find the auto page for it. I knew it was somewhere. I don't see any reason to keep the link to the manual page. Do you? --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 08:11, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::Not unless you want it. I'll remove it. Should I add the similar link for 'crats or is that unnecessary at this point? --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 08:25, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
::::To be honest, I have no idea what the Burecrats role does. Might be unnecessary now but helpful in the future? --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 11:16, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::::Bureaucrats can turn other users into administrators (or indeed, other bureaucrats). That privilege isn't available to ordinary administrators. I'd keep it to yourself for the time being. :-) --[[User:Yirba|Yirba]] ([[User talk:Yirba|talk]]) 17:39, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
::::::You can actually see a technical list of which rights each group confers at [[Special:ListGroupRights]]. As the wiki grows, you might want to spin off a few, such as the ability to grant rollbacker and autopatrolled, to admins as some other wikis have. But for the time being, at least, there's really no reason for the wiki to have more than one 'crat. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 17:07, 2 August 2012 (EDT)

== Community portal ==

I've created the [[Explain XKCD:Community portal]] as a tools/help page. If that's not what you want, feel free to change/move/whatever it, but I thought it'd be nice to save this page for discussion of the Main Page and discuss the wiki as a whole/ask for help there. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 08:36, 1 August 2012 (EDT)

== Direct link to latest comic ==

There should be a direct link to the latest comic at the top of the Main page. A nice thing about going to explainxkcd.com was that the latest comic is right there at the top. For those changing their default link to the wiki, there should be an easy "Latest Comic" link that quickly takes them there. I'm sure some folks actually skip xkcd.com and come directly here instead to read the latest offering from Randall. They shouldn't have to search for it.
[[User:Christopher Foxx|- CFoxx]] ([[User talk:Christopher Foxx|talk]]) 11:59, 1 August 2012 (EDT)

: Maybe the page [[latest]] should redirect to the most recent comic? Could that be taken care of by some sort of script/template so it doesn't have to be manually updated? Should each explination page also have "next", "previous", "random", "first" and "latest" links, possibly also generated automatically via scripts/templates? Additionally, shouldn't the number page be the canonical one? It seems like [[Internal monologue]] should redirect to [[1089]] rather than the other way around - certainly it would make a bunch of scripting types of things a lot easier. [[User:J-beda|J-beda]] ([[User talk:J-beda|talk]]) 13:02, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::If you wanted, we could even use wiki-magic to show the title of the page as the Comic name, but the URL as the number - in order to parallel the actual XKCD website. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 17:09, 2 August 2012 (EDT)
:: Shouldn't there be a way to programmatically find the comic with the highest number that has a page with content? That would work as long as no one puts future comic pages up. --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 20:25, 1 August 2012 (EDT)
:::It's all sounding like folks are over-complicating something quite easy. All I'm suggesting is a prominent link to http://www.xkcd.com/. No need, I think, to list which number the latest is, or include the next/last/random buttons, etc. [[User:Christopher Foxx|- CFoxx]] ([[User talk:Christopher Foxx|talk]]) 11:41, 3 August 2012 (EDT)
::::Oh. We've got that, now, in the sidebar - labeled as "XKCD." I do think that having an internal link to the latest (explained) comic would be a great thing, though. --''[[User:Philosopher|Philosopher]]'' [[User talk:Philosopher|Let us reason together.]] 16:36, 4 August 2012 (EDT)

You can transclude the latest comic on the main page like this: <nowiki>{{:pagename}} e.g. {{:Internal_monologue}} </nowiki>--[[User:SurturZ|SurturZ]] ([[User talk:SurturZ|talk]]) 00:25, 2 August 2012 (EDT)
: I've started with just a manual link to the latest comic. Ideally it will be automatic, but a manual link will work for now as I've had quite a few people ask for it. --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 21:09, 1 August 2012 (EDT)

Transclusion of the latest comic is great. Someone with the right permissions should add (for instance on the top-right corner of the grey transclusion area) a link to edit the corresponding wiki page, so that people seeing something they could add would feel invited to do so (wiki style). In my opinion this would be a good way to improve the quality of the user-generated explanations.
Also, all the "XKCD"s in the "New here?" section should be converted to the lowercase "xkcd"...
[[User:Cos|Cos]] ([[User talk:Cos|talk]]) 14:00, 6 August 2012 (UTC)
:Good points. I've done both. --[[User:Waldir|Waldir]] ([[User talk:Waldir|talk]]) 15:48, 6 August 2012 (UTC)

Call me dumb, but... You've got a link called "prev" that goes to the explaination for the previous comic. Then a link called "comic #42" but that goes to xkcd. And then a smaller, less prominent link called "go to this comic" that doesn't go to the comic but to its explaination. Anyone else think that's a little back-to-front? [[User:Zootle|Zootle]] ([[User talk:Zootle|talk]]) 17:18, 31 August 2012 (UTC)
:OK, you're dumb :-). The standard template for an explanation page includes the header with "Prev", "Comic # (date)", and "Next" links. If we don't have explanation pages for the previous or next comic, we don't show the respective link. I hadn't noticed that the "Comic # (date)" bit was a link to the xkcd site before, but in context it makes sense to me. Including a link to the Explain page for the comic who's explain page you are already looking at doesn't make sense.
:The explanation page for the latest comic is "transcluded" in the main page pretty much as-is, so we get the header, the comic, the explanation, etc. We don't get the discussion, which is visible at the bottom of the Explain page. Because there is never an explanation for a comic that hasn't been released yet, there is never a "Next" link on the main page's transcluded header. So you get "Prev" and "Comic" links. The "Go to this comic" link is added by the main page above the transcluded explain page.
:I can see how the "Go to this comic" link might be poorly worded especially as it's placement seems to be within the explanation it's linking to. [[User:Blaisepascal|Blaisepascal]] ([[User talk:Blaisepascal|talk]]) 18:16, 31 August 2012 (UTC)
::Rather than "Go to this comic" maybe it could be "Go to full explanation" ? Something else? [[User:J-beda|J-beda]] ([[User talk:J-beda|talk]]) 13:38, 5 September 2012 (UTC)
::There was [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Admin_requests#.22Edit_this_explanation.22_link_on_main_page a discussion at one point] about a wittier/more descriptive link - but no one came up with anything. I do like "Go to Full Explanation" better, for what it's worth. --[[User:DanB|DanB]] ([[User talk:DanB|talk]]) 15:31, 5 September 2012 (UTC)
:::My problem with that suggestion is that it implies that the main page explanation is not full. As of right now, the full explanation is transcluded on the main page. There's nothing more to see by clicking that link (explanation wise) Perhaps "Go to full explanation page" but that doesn't quite sound right to me... [[User:TheHYPO|TheHYPO]] ([[User talk:TheHYPO|talk]]) 15:42, 7 September 2012 (UTC)
::::How about "Go to this Comic Explanation Page"? One nice thing about the specific page rather than the [[Main_Page]] transcoding is that it nicely includes the discussion as well. I have a bookmark to the [[Main_Page]] that I look at every day, but I want to easily read the discussions, not only the explanation. Humm, maybe we could have a page [[most recent comic]] that automagically redirects to the most recent comic? [[User:J-beda|J-beda]] ([[User talk:J-beda|talk]]) 12:42, 8 September 2012 (UTC)
:::::I tried to get [[most recent comic]] to redirect to LATESTCOMIC, but can't get the syntax working - it is possible? [[User:J-beda|J-beda]] ([[User talk:J-beda|talk]]) 13:03, 8 September 2012 (UTC)
::::::Apparently it isn't. I would have tried <code><nowiki>#REDIRECT [[{{LATESTCOMIC}}]]</nowiki></code> like you did, but since that doesn't work, I'll delete the page for now. --[[User:Waldir|Waldir]] ([[User talk:Waldir|talk]]) 16:38, 20 November 2012 (UTC)

== Discussion of latest comic ==
Perhaps include the discussions of the latest comic here? I almost missed there was a discussion field a few times because I would only read about the latest comic on the main page. [[User:Carewolf|Carewolf]] ([[User talk:Carewolf|talk]]) 14:54, 22 September 2012 (UTC)

This comics's explanation is complete bollocks, I think. Of course it is NOT a "fact that such a room exists". This comics parodies trope often used in cop movies - an elderly cop goes to work for the last time before his retirement, packs things, plans fishing the next day ... only to be called to one more case (possibly with a new, young and brash partner). And despites his efforts not to screw anything and stay clear of danger, he is either mortally wounded or screws big time and is degraded. So much clichè, that if someone says "It's my last day or service", you might be sure one of the two options above happens. See http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Retirony [[User:edheldil|Edheldil]] 10:17, 26 September 2012 (UTC)

I believe this link maybe relevant: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turtle_graphics {{unsigned|Rhudi}}

== The comic explanation count is wrong ==

The adjustment is currently 3, but there are now 6 subcategories and one list making the current correct adjustment 7.
If the wiki was upgraded to version 1.20, a form exists to automatically exclude subcategories.
--[[User:Divad27182|Divad27182]] ([[User talk:Divad27182|talk]]) 09:56, 8 October 2012 (UTC)

:Looks like another week of the wiki going down then.
:But seriously, I've been noticing this too. Didn't know what was causing it, but it's going to have to be fixed sometime.[[User:Davidy22|Davidy22]] ([[User talk:Davidy22|talk]]) 10:25, 8 October 2012 (UTC)

::The text reads <pre><nowiki>We already have [[:Category:Comics|'''{{#expr:{{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-3}}''' comic explanations]]!</nowiki></pre> The -3 is to account for the subcategories and non-explanation pages in the category. There apparently used to be three such pages, and now there are seven. I would fix this myself, but the page is protected. If the wiki where upgraded to version 1.20, the categories could be explicitly excluded, but the [[List of all comics]] would still be in the category. (Note that the -3 actually appears twice.) --[[User:Divad27182|Divad27182]] ([[User talk:Divad27182|talk]]) 05:03, 11 October 2012 (UTC)

:::Mediawiki 1.20 fixes this issue, although it'd be nice if this could be fixed in the meantime via the hack reccommended by divad. [[User:Davidy22|Davidy22]][[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>(talk)</tt>]] 06:40, 16 November 2012 (UTC)

:Looks like Waldir updated the "Comic Correction Count" to "10" (as of 20 November 2012):
<nowiki> We already have [[:Category:Comics|'''{{#expr:{{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-10}}''' comic explanations]]!</big>
Note: the -10 in the calculation above is to discount subcategories (there are 7 of them as of 20 November 2012),
non-comic pages (2 as of same date: [[List of all comics]] and [[Exoplanet]])
and the comic 404, which was deliberately not posted. Thus 7 + 2 + 1 = 10
(But there are still {{#expr:{{LATESTCOMIC}}-({{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-10)}} to go. Come and [[List of all comics|add yours]]!)</nowiki>
:Could we possibly make this more dynamic by creating a "IGNORE_IN_COUNT" category or something? and then using something like: <nowiki>{#expr:{{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-{{PAGESINCAT:IGNORE_IN_COUNT}}}</nowiki>? Then any additional entries to the "Comics" category (that are 'special' entries) could just have the special category added and no main page editing would be necessary? --[[User:Bpothier|B. P.]] ([[User talk:Bpothier|talk]]) 07:50, 22 November 2012 (UTC)

==Make Jeff stop apologizing==
The apology for server downtime has been around for a while now. Can we take it down? [[User:Davidy22|Davidy22]] ([[User talk:Davidy22|talk]]) 04:41, 11 October 2012 (UTC)

== Spambots ==

I think someone should install [http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:AbuseFilter AbuseFilter]. --[[User:Kronf|Kronf]] ([[User talk:Kronf|talk]]) 10:09, 13 October 2012 (UTC)

== Purge ==

We should regularly purge the server's cache for the main page using http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Main_Page&action=purge to keep the explanation up to date. --[[User:Kronf|Kronf]] ([[User talk:Kronf|talk]]) 02:28, 3 November 2012 (UTC)

== Updating the Rules ==

I've been having a lovely discussion with someone who apparently thought the "edit anything you want" rule applied to the Talk pages. As we don't have any codified rules for ''here'' and can only point to "well the canonical way this is done on Wikipedia is..." I think that there are a few things we need to put into the list of Rules on the front page, and then have a link to a more in-depth talk about why the rules exist and what-not.

Specifically, I'm talking about writing "Feel free to edit any page on the wiki to be better. But, treat talk pages like you would blog comments: comments by other people ''cannot be changed by you'', you can only respond to them." as a new rule to be plastered on the front page, as there seems to be an increasing number social neophytes that seem to think that editing words that are attributed as being said by another person is perfectly legitimate and non-controversial.

Shall we discuss? [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 01:25, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

:We could add the etiquette rules as an addendum to the signature reminder at the top of the page. Just an extra note below the alert box asking people to not edit other people's comments. [[User:Davidy22|Davidy22]][[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>(talk)</tt>]] 06:40, 16 November 2012 (UTC)

::It really should be right down with the "edited mercilessly" description, because this is an exception to that statement. Shouldn't have two sets of contradictory instructions in different places. When I made my improper edit, I had a semi-conscious moment of doubt about whether changing the other guy's comment was ok, even though this is a wiki (and even though it wasn't really clear to me that this "discussion" box held something totally separate from the page content), but that statement at the bottom put all such doubts to rest. I read it multiple times to be sure. But I did not notice that line at the top about the four tildes until ''much'' later. It's somewhat lost, visually, in the header line, when you're not looking directly at it.[[Special:Contributions/50.0.38.245|50.0.38.245]] 18:32, 18 November 2012 (UTC)

:::There's discussion to replace that message with a more noticeable alert box. The message at the bottom of the page appears for all pages, including talk pages, so a talk-page specific message there would not entirely fit. [[User:Davidy22|Davidy22]][[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>(talk)</tt>]] 00:18, 19 November 2012 (UTC)

::::If that text at the bottom is in fact alterable, it should be written to take every case into account. It's an extremely poor user interface that has instructions appearing on a page stating rules that are the exact opposite of reality. And note that the altert box on the top looks a lot like a banner add, when you don't focus on it and read it. People will tend to habitually filter out anything written there from their perception. Also, it can easily be scrolled off the top of the screen when the discussion starts to get long, and they have a preview displayed.
::::So I think after the "...then do not submit it here.", it should add, "'''Exception''': others' comments in Discussion pages are not to be altered. See full rules at <<link to appropriate wikipedia page>>."[[Special:Contributions/50.0.38.245|50.0.38.245]] 15:46, 28 November 2012 (UTC)

== Update after changes ==

The front page explanation hasn't been updated at all day to match changes in the explanation on the comic's page. This is a major problem i think, as it is the front page explanation people visitors will most often read. --[[User:St.nerol|St.nerol]] ([[User talk:St.nerol|talk]]) 20:43, 26 November 2012 (UTC)
: It might be a caching issue. Appending <code>&action=purge</code> to the URL will probably fix it. Can you confirm it looks good to you now? --[[User:Waldir|Waldir]] ([[User talk:Waldir|talk]]) 00:29, 27 November 2012 (UTC)
::Yep, now it updates instantly! Well done, whatever you did! :) --[[User:St.nerol|St.nerol]] ([[User talk:St.nerol|talk]]) 16:24, 27 November 2012 (UTC)

:::I've also added a link underneath the comic box that has the action embedded, so no one has to do any manual URL hacking. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 17:38, 11 December 2012 (UTC)

::::Just wanted to check in on this - are there issues with automated systems or spammers following this link? I know it can affect performance - caching is important on a busy site! --[[User:Overand|Overand]] ([[User talk:Overand|talk]]) 22:37, 13 September 2013 (UTC)

== Suggestion: Change "Go to this comic" to "Go to this entry" ==

Just a small suggestion. For the Main Page, I suggest changing "Go to this comic" to say "Go to this ''entry''" instead to remove any confusion for new and regular viewers. It certainly took me a while to figure how to go to each featured comic's entry from the main page.

[[Special:Contributions/69.43.114.2|69.43.114.2]] 17:04, 11 December 2012 (UTC)

:How about if it reads "Go to this comic explanation"? Would that be less confusing? I only quibble because the explanations aren't really entries, in wiki parlance each page is usually called an article, but that doesn't seem to fit here as we really have explanation pages. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 17:41, 11 December 2012 (UTC)

::Agreed. [[User:Ctxppc|Randy Marsh]] ([[User talk:Ctxppc|talk]]) 22:55, 8 January 2013 (UTC)

== Explain the Unreleased Comic? ==
:I wonder if [[http://i56.tinypic.com/a9ton8.png this comic]] is permitted to be explained, despite the double issue of Randall pulling the comic plus me finding the pulled comic through "xkcd overrated"... [[User:Greyson|Greyson]] ([[User talk:Greyson|talk]]) 18:21, 12 December 2012 (UTC)

== Comic 1156 ==

I don't have an account to edit the page directly, so here's an edit someone should make:
It looks like whoever wrote the existing page simply googled 'conditioning' and found the first link that came up.
Please modify the link to point to 'Classical conditioning', not 'Operant conditioning'.
Thanks. {{unsigned ip|124.191.56.91|05:26, 7 January 2013‎ (UTC)}}

:Hi. This is the talk page for the main page of the wiki. This page only has a "view" of the actual comic explanation. The actual explanation page is at [[1156: Conditioning]], and I assure you, edit permissions have not been restricted for that page. Someone has already changed the page to link to Classical conditioning, but the original editor came back stating that Operant was correct. If you would like to start a discussion about this [[Talk:1156: Conditioning|on the talk page for this explanation]] that would be much more conducive to getting this matter settled. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 05:52, 7 January 2013 (UTC)

== Comic Links ==

Some of the links seem to be confusing, as they're titled in a weird way. The link/button 'go to this comic', I'd expect would go to the actual comic on XKCD's page. Yet it goes to the comic's wiki page. And clicking on the comic # and date directs you to the XKCD page, yet I really feel that link should go to the wiki page, as it's right at the top center there, and has the date and everything, sort of indicating that it's a wiki page, yet it's not. And the prev and next buttons next to it don't go to the xkcd page, they go to the wiki pages. Which is really messed up, I think. Because of my confusion, every single time I visit here, I clicked on the wrong link, though now I've gotten used to it. I suggest rewording the links as 'XKCD Comic # and date' and 'go to this comic's wiki page'. And possibly switching the links' positions so that the wiki links could be in that navigation bar and the XKCD links could be off to the side. After all, we are a wiki, so putting our wiki links to the comic off to the side and the direct xkcd link in the center seems odd. Anyway, has anyone had the same thoughts and/or agree with me on this?--[[Special:Contributions/69.119.250.251|69.119.250.251]] 18:19, 9 January 2013 (UTC)

== Unexplained comics ==

The template that starts each explanation page should be edited to have the next and previous buttons automatically skip over pages that don't exist, rather than simply not being there if comic n+1 or n-1 doesn't exist. Preferably it would append a notice to the next page (like the redirect notices commonly found on mediawiki) telling you how many comics have been skipped. I'm not sure how feasible this would be to script, however. [[Special:Contributions/130.160.145.185|130.160.145.185]] 23:45, 9 March 2013 (UTC)

== Percentage of remaining comics calculation is off... ==

Okay, I hate to be "that pedantic math guy", but... Today the main page reads "We have collaboratively explained 936 xkcd comics, and only 252 (27%) remain." While I agree that 252/936 is roughly 27%, I believe we should really be calculating the percentage as "the number left to explain" divided by "the total number of comics that exist", not divided by "the number we have finished". That is (today), 252/1188=21%. Think about it. If we had completed 594 comics today, with 594 remaining, what should the percentage be? 594/594=100%? That's not right... 594/1188=50%? That's what we really want to say.

The page is protected, which makes sense. So I'll make my suggestion here.

Change this:

<pre>
and only {{#expr:{{LATESTCOMIC}}-({{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-9)}}
({{#expr: ({{LATESTCOMIC}}-({{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-9)) / ({{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-9) * 100 round 0}}%)
remain.
</pre>
To this:
<pre>
and only {{#expr:{{LATESTCOMIC}}-({{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-9)}}
({{#expr: ({{LATESTCOMIC}}-({{PAGESINCAT:Comics}}-9)) / {{#expr:{{LATESTCOMIC}}}} * 100 round 0}}%)
remain.
</pre>
[[User:Imperpay|Imperpay]] ([[User talk:Imperpay|talk]]) 15:32, 20 March 2013 (UTC)

:Done and done. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|purple|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 15:37, 20 March 2013 (UTC)

:Thanks for the heads-up! However, notice that the #expr: around LATESTCOMIC was unnecessary. I've removed it. [[User:Waldir|Waldir]] ([[User talk:Waldir|talk]]) 11:30, 21 March 2013 (UTC)

::Waldir, you have exposed me as a charlatan and a fool! (I just copied, pasted, and tinkered until I made something that worked. I don't actually understand it. No formal training, you see. It's what we used to call "hacking" back in the dawn of the digital era, before the word took on connotations of vandalism, trespassing, and fraud. Have you kids come up with another word for it?) [[User:Imperpay|Imperpay]] ([[User talk:Imperpay|talk]]) 13:59, 22 March 2013 (UTC)

::: Joke's on me then, 'cause you sure fooled me – I readily assumed you knew your way around those parser functions. Nice job hacking the code, it was a nearly perfect crime ;) --[[User:Waldir|Waldir]] ([[User talk:Waldir|talk]]) 03:26, 25 March 2013 (UTC)

:::I've heard the cool kids call that the "Maker Mentality", usually with a reference to [http://makezine.com/ Make magazine] and [http://makerfaire.com/ Maker Faire]. But I think there's also a movement to resurrect the original meaning of hacker. [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 04:21, 25 March 2013 (UTC)

==sidebar ads?==
''Moved to [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals]] –– [[User:St.nerol|St.nerol]] ([[User talk:St.nerol|talk]]) 08:06, 4 May 2013 (UTC)''

== Expression error on Main Page ==

Please use <code><nowiki>{{PAGESINCAT:...|R}}</nowiki></code> instead of <code><nowiki>{{PAGESINCAT:...}}</nowiki></code> to correct these errors :) --[[Special:Contributions/110.168.83.62|110.168.83.62]] 10:55, 8 April 2013 (UTC)
:Dun diddly done. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 11:21, 8 April 2013 (UTC)

== Compile a list of non-technical comics to non-technical readers? ==

I'm a long-time reader and fan of >< |< C |}, but my normal approach is useless when I introduce this provocative comic series to my less technical friends. They stay at the apparent level of many comics. They don't bother reading the explanations, but they would say, "it's hard to make sense". Imagine an average non-technical (and non-arts) major guy/girl, can we compile a list of state-of-the-art but less-technical, easy-to-comprehend but "ah ha!!" strips that is suitable for them? --[[User:FrenzY|W shll nvr flly xpln xkcd!]] ([[User talk:FrenzY|talk]]) 12:39, 18 May 2013 (UTC)
:Oh my god that signature.
:Gaah, derailment. Uh, pretty much anything that isn't tagged with the physics or math categories are easy enough to understand for the average English speaker, so just check the categories at the bottom of the page for that. Also, avoid comics with the incomplete tag, and that oughta be fine. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 14:41, 18 May 2013 (UTC)

== Quit building? ==
''This post was moved to [[Talk:1214: Geoguessr]].''

:Hello, this is the talk page for the content of the front page of the wiki, not for discussion of the most recent comic, that happens [[Talk:1214: Geoguessr|here]]. I've moved your post over there for you. Cheers, and welcome to explain xkcd! [[User:Lcarsos|lcarsos]]_a ([[User talk:Lcarsos|talk]]) 05:09, 22 May 2013 (UTC)

== List of incomplete comics ==
We need a link to the "Incomplete articles" at the main page below the "Missing link". Most pages are created but many are incomplete.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 19:06, 7 June 2013 (UTC)

== Header message ==

'''Please don't take this seriously unless you actually think it's a good idea:'''

I think the header should be changed from "explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb." to "explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb... or still have some hope that comic [[1190]] will end." or something similar. [[User:Schiffy|Schiffy]] ([[User_talk:Schiffy|Speak to me]]|[[Special:Contributions/Schiffy|What I've done]]) 14:53, 9 June 2013 (UTC)

::Nope! This page is trying to explain more than 1222 comics, not only [[1190: Time]]. The header just states the truth.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 15:49, 9 June 2013 (UTC)

I'd vote for a change. People have started coming over to discuss the comic even when they've 'gotten' it. That, and the fact that this is one step ahead of Googling the references yourself. So.. maybe, "it's because you're dumb..and lazy."[[Special:Contributions/220.224.246.97|220.224.246.97]] 02:26, 31 August 2013 (UTC)

As a regular reader of explainxkcd (who was to lazy to cotribute anything until now), I'd like to support the proposed edit. (... and lazy) It really fits to the tone of our favourite waste of otherwise productive time (which is xkcd for myself). Best wishes from Heidelberg, Germany. --[[Special:Contributions/147.142.13.86|147.142.13.86]] 14:38, 10 October 2013 (UTC)

== A point of confusion ==

Why is 'Apatosaurus' a category but 'Internet Argument' no longer a category? [[User:Greyson|Greyson]] ([[User talk:Greyson|talk]]) 13:53, 20 June 2013 (UTC)
:Cuz people hit the random button, see an Apatosaurus feature in three comics and figure it must be a recurring theme. Same as the internet argument thing. Will get round to a category purge after we've cleared out all the incomplete tags. I think there's one for ferrets hidden away somewhere in the dark recesses of our catalog of categories. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 14:45, 20 June 2013 (UTC)
::On the subject, can I suggest a "Barred from Conferences" category, or similar? That's definitely a recurring theme (for a long, long time), and thus should be justified enough. I'd be happy to add various qualifying articles as I scroll through again, if I can, but first I'll leave it up to someone else to solidify the actual name. (In case it turns out not to be just conferences, for example.) [[Special:Contributions/178.98.31.27|178.98.31.27]] 16:27, 22 June 2013 (UTC)

== Incomplete comics statement ==

I suggest the minor change: "We have an explanation for all x xkcd comics, and only y (y/x %) are '''marked as''' incomplete." –[[User:St.nerol|St.nerol]] ([[User talk:St.nerol|talk]]) 08:07, 21 June 2013 (UTC)

== 1262 is out ==

So what are you waiting for? [[Special:Contributions/75.60.27.102|75.60.27.102]] 06:25, 9 September 2013 (UTC)
:<nowiki>(diff | hist) . . N 1262: Unquote‎; 06:23, 9 September 2013 (UTC) . . (+322)‎ . . ‎Davidy22 (Talk | contribs | block)‎ (Created page with "{{comic | number = 1262 | date = September 9, 2013 | title = Unquote | image = unquote.png | titletext = I guess it's a saying from the Old Country. }} ==Expl...")</nowiki>
:Examine the time stamps. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 06:30, 9 September 2013 (UTC)

== Adverts ==

I am not going to disable my adblock, I hate ads. If you accept bitcoin I can make a donation though. [[Special:Contributions/184.66.160.91|184.66.160.91]] 05:24, 27 September 2013 (UTC)
:Our ads are always easy-to-load images as opposed to flash ads, they're always pointing to some valuable product of some form and we've looked at and approved all of them. They also occupy space that would otherwise have been empty, as our one ad is bound strictly to the sidebar. We used to have a paypal donation button, but it was pitifully tended to and a much less reliable source of income than ads. Ads are the only reliable business model for small sites like this one; unless our readers suddenly become willing to pay all our server costs for us, we can't feasibly afford a better hosting plan without ads. We legally aren't allowed to open a merch store, because that infringes on Randall's shop, and we haven't had a single generous benefactor yet. If you want to stop seeing our server error messages, loosening up adblock for us and contributing to our impressions count will help us massively. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 06:00, 27 September 2013 (UTC)

I don't care about your server message, I wanted to make a donation. Sooo, you don't want any bitcoins? [[Special:Contributions/37.221.161.235|37.221.161.235]] 07:16, 27 September 2013 (UTC)
:This took a bit of digging. We're fine with bitcoin donations, it's just that at the rate donations came in, they were just not enough to pay for anything. [https://coinbase.com/checkouts/b19f921822ac962807a8f72d51509e59] '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 20:34, 28 September 2013 (UTC)

Donation made! [[Special:Contributions/184.66.160.91|184.66.160.91]] 23:23, 30 September 2013 (UTC)
:Thanks! '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 02:27, 1 October 2013 (UTC)

== /wiki is returning a 403 ==

Hello, 
http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/ is returning a 403 now. In my eyes you should redirect it to the main-page instead :-). --[[User:DaB.|DaB.]] ([[User talk:DaB.|talk]]) 12:41, 8 November 2013 (UTC)
:We have a new, hopefully better, server. The problem is already reported to [[User_talk:Jeff#Forbidden]] --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 14:22, 8 November 2013 (UTC)

== Explain Explain XKCD / Explain^2 XKCD ==

This particular comic explanation requires explanation. Way too many potential cross references with each conjecture requiring its own explanation page. Dial it back a little. {{unsigned ip|108.162.245.11}}
:Uh, sorry, could you clarify that a little? '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 07:23, 19 November 2013 (UTC)

::He is talking about the [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/ http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/] issue. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 21:32, 19 November 2013 (UTC)
:::Well if it's that, that's an intentional permissions setting on a URL that no-one is feasibly going to type. Unless you can come up with a better use for that URL, with a reason? '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 08:40, 20 November 2013 (UTC)
::::A symlink to "index.php" at the root folder would solve the problem.--[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 09:26, 20 November 2013 (UTC)
:::::I cannot believe how many weeks that took to fix. Amazing. No one was going to type it, but everyone was going to get redirected to it from the home page! [[Special:Contributions/108.162.222.227|108.162.222.227]] 11:37, 20 November 2013 (UTC)

The problem is still not solved. [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/ http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/] gives still a 403 error because "index.php" is not included in the http server configuration as a default index page. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 20:07, 20 November 2013 (UTC)
:: I've fixed this. Sorry about the delay. Was super busy! --[[User:Jeff|Jeff]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 16:02, 21 November 2013 (UTC)
:::Thanks Jeff, it's working. --[[User:Dgbrt|Dgbrt]] ([[User talk:Dgbrt|talk]]) 22:20, 21 November 2013 (UTC)

== Webmaster: Obtrusive video ad on your site ==

In the ad section I saw a box sticking out and blocking out the explanation. This was therefore a very obtrusive botched video ad. Please remove this ad from your site. [[Special:Contributions/199.27.128.188|199.27.128.188]] 22:29, 6 June 2014 (UTC)

EDIT: It's now sticking out and preventing me from clicking on the "Save page" button. [[Special:Contributions/199.27.128.188|199.27.128.188]] 22:29, 6 June 2014 (UTC)
:We only accept GIFs for moving ads. Ads should also be contained within the sidebar as they're techonogically restricted to standard-sized PNGs and GIFs, so an extruding ad would be a CSS error on the site end/browser error. In addition, we run ads from lots of advertisers, and "this ad" is not specific enough to tell us which ad you want us to remove. Could you provide a screenshot/link/more information? '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 22:54, 6 June 2014 (UTC)

== Adding an arcs list page ==

I think there should be a page listing all webcomics arcs so far (the red spiders, the race, etc.)[[Special:Contributions/188.114.102.134|188.114.102.134]] 12:47, 2 October 2014 (UTC)

:This already exists, see [[:Category:Comic series]]. --[[User:Waldir|Waldir]] ([[User talk:Waldir|talk]]) 05:39, 10 April 2015 (UTC)

== This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: link ==

This has been bothering me for a while now. Why does the link in the info box for the main page link to editing the main page? It needs to link to the editing of the page which the comic's explanation is on. When I would like to edit the latest XKCD explanation, I click that thinking I am going to edit the explanation, but instead I am led to editing the main page. [[User:Auraxangelic|Auraxangelic]] ([[User talk:Auraxangelic|talk]]) 15:19, 24 October 2014 (UTC)
:Ooooooh, nice catch. I've actually never noticed that before, and it's definitely not intentional. It happens because the text of the explanation page is folded into the main page before mediawiki parses links and syntax, and the "Edit this page" button links to the page that the link is on. I have an idea for how to fix it though, so I'll get on that. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 01:49, 25 October 2014 (UTC)

== #1454 - bad description ==

"Curly-hair states longingly..." She comes across as disappointed (or even heartbroken), not "longing", which suggests sounding somewhat positive and energetic, rather than deflated. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.88|141.101.99.88]] 22:29, 2 December 2014 (UTC)

==Cueball/Rob merge==

It seems to me from a general reading of the comics that Randall has always intended for the character we here call "Cueball" to have the name "Rob". Much as "Cutie" was renamed "Megan" when we learned her name, and now she is identified as "Megan" even in comics where her name is not explicitly mentioned, I think we should consider merging the "Cueball" and "Rob" articles. I know there's a lot of inertia here, but it seems to me that this is Randall's intention for the character's name. [[User:Djbrasier|Djbrasier]] ([[User talk:Djbrasier|talk]]) 13:38, 10 March 2015 (UTC)
: Alternatively, we should un-merge [[Megan]] and [[Cutie]] for consistency. [[User:Djbrasier|Djbrasier]] ([[User talk:Djbrasier|talk]]) 14:50, 10 March 2015 (UTC)
: I'm pretty sure this is an augmentation of the author's internal characters, including the one he has developed involuntarily as to the nature of his love. His memory of his love is not his love, yet it is what he has to love. Randall seems the type to delve into this, and thus I am in support of keeping the character names as they stand. /eof [[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.185|173.245.56.185]] 05:43, 25 March 2015 (UTC)

== Kerbal Space Program ==

I'm a schizophrenic who's been playing Kerbal Space Program for about five days with no sleep, and I'm pretty sure this is a reference to [https://www.google.com/search?q=xkcd+kerbal+space+program&oq=xkcd+kerbal+space+program&aqs=chrome..69i57.10851j0j7&sourceid=chrome&es_sm=122&ie=UTF-8 comic 1365] :D [[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.185|173.245.56.185]] 05:39, 25 March 2015 (UTC)

== 1509 is missing ==

When will it be added? By bot, I presume.--[[User:17jiangz1|17jiangz1]] ([[User talk:17jiangz1|talk]]) 04:51, 8 April 2015 (UTC)

== Broken Date Box on comics ==

The "Comic #1511 (April 13, 2015)" textbox that appears on top of each comic breaks if you shrink the screen. I think the space after the comma needs to be replaced with a non breaking space.{{unsigned ip|108.162.238.144}}

:Is it fixed now? '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 20:59, 13 April 2015 (UTC)

::It looks like it. I had pointed it out once before and it was fixed. I guess somebody reverted that change or something... --[[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.202|173.245.56.202]] 13:42, 15 April 2015 (UTC)

== 1515? ==

Is it correct that we have 1515 comics, as of April 15, 2015? --[[Special:Contributions/173.245.48.122|173.245.48.122]] 05:20, 15 April 2015 (UTC)
:It's not, but some people insist on making comic pages for things that aren't comics. I'll fix that. '''[[User:Davidy22|{{Color|#707|David}}y²²]]'''[[User talk:Davidy22|<tt>[talk]</tt>]] 06:27, 15 April 2015 (UTC)

Talk:1501: Mysteries

2015-03-20T21:07:36Z

173.245.56.202:

Here's a list of wikipedia links I compiled that will be useful for anyone wanting to update this page. http://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/2zog5d/xkcd_1501_mysteries/cpktray {{unsigned ip|‎141.101.106.155}}

And I've got a solar eclipse to see (explainable, but weird!) but I started to compile things. Haven't got any links sorted yet, and percentages are (badly) done by eye. If someone does it better, ignore it.


[[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.63|141.101.98.63]] 09:33, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

:(Whoops, pasted the flatfile format version by accident, in my rush, rather than the more Wikifriendly one that I discarded. Commenting it out until/unless I redo it. But you should still be able to see the details via the Talk Edit pages if you're bothered. Oh, and there was really too much cloud to see the eclipse for what it was. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.63|141.101.98.63]] 10:29, 20 March 2015 (UTC))

::I dropped the image into our CAD system and plotted the point co-ordinates. I've filled in the resulting percentages, which should be somewhere about right with a little rounding. --[[User:Pudder|Pudder]] ([[User talk:Pudder|talk]]) 10:35, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

:::Exactly right. (Although I didn't read the zero/zero crossing point is supposed to be maybe 50% on both scales, but instead ±zero. Still, doesn't matter. And perhaps displays/sorts better.) And looks like I don't need to recover my formatted notes after all. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.63|141.101.98.63]] 11:19, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

[[Special:Contributions/199.27.128.176|199.27.128.176]] 09:49, 20 March 2015 (UTC) XKCD has explained the Voynich Manuscript before: http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/593:_Voynich_Manuscript

:XKCD has also 'explained' DB Cooper before ([[1400: D.B. Cooper]]) if that is worth mentioning. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.250.167|108.162.250.167]] 12:06, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

I have to wonder if Randall has ever seen http://keithledgerwood.com/post/79838944823/did-malaysian-airlines-370-disappear-using and if so, whether he simply doesn't believe it. Not to sabotage his 100%-100% example if he wants to keep it there, but I'd put it at only 50% weird and 10% unexplainable. [[Special:Contributions/199.27.133.27|199.27.133.27]] 14:02, 20 March 2015 (UTC)
: Oh lawdy, the tinfoil hat brigade has arrived. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.202|173.245.56.202]]

;Carly Simon

The Carly Simon explanation includes the text "This sets up a paradox in which the song is and isn't about the vain person." This isn't correct. The song is definitely about the person. Carly is thus asserting that the subject's vanity will lead him to a correct interpretation of the song. Going to change the explanation. [[User:EverVigilant|EverVigilant]] ([[User talk:EverVigilant|talk]]) 14:51, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

I don't see why this is on Randall's chart. The Wikipedia article is all the explanation the world needs. And Warren Beatty's reaction to the song simply seals it for me. No Big Deal. Move On. ''– [[User:Tbc|tbc]] ([[User talk:Tbc|talk]]) 18:41, 20 March 2015 (UTC)''

;WOW signa

It now says "This is the strongest evidence to date of extraterrestrial radio signals.", which is technically incorrect. We observe radio signals from outer space all the time, they originate from young stars, Big Bang, active galaxies, and so on. This should probably be rephrased to something about extraterrestrial intelligence, but I'm not sure if it deserves to be called "evidence". [[User:Jolindbe|Jolindbe]] ([[User talk:Jolindbe|talk]]) 16:18, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

;Dyatlov Pass

Um, Wikipedia regards avalanche as most plausible explanation of the Dyatlov Pass incident, and it appears to be most widespread and down-to-earth explanation that doesn't involve the supernatural or secret soviet weapons test, things like that. Shouldn't we include mention of the avalance then, perhaps? I mean, with such high "explainability" rating it's pretty clear that Randall probably assumes avalanche, since if he assumed other, less widespread theory he probably would downgrade the "explainability" to account for the fact that it's more disputed version. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.89.222|141.101.89.222]] 18:13, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

;Off the chart up and to the right

How the Universe came into existence (the physics and math behind "Why is there something rather than nothing?") is far weirder with less of an explanation than anything on Randall's chart – scientists' claims, which redefine "nothing," notwithstanding. And then how life started and evolved (the chemistry and biology – and quantum physics? – at the transition point between inanimate amino acids and cells and the subsequent arrival of ''homo sapiens'') is almost as strange as the Big Bang. ''– [[User:Tbc|tbc]] ([[User talk:Tbc|talk]]) 18:34, 20 March 2015 (UTC)''

== Inaccurate explainability rating ==

I've read the Russian wikipedia article on Dyatlov Pass Incident and not only it's incredibly weird (much more details than condensed English article), but also no plausible explanation is provided that would account for all the incredibly weird stuff going on. I have no idea how that could be awarded 96% explainability.

UVB-76, on the other hand, is a pretty easy to explain as one-time-pad encrypted military broadcast, with buzzing to occupy the frequency and discourage others from using it. How is that just 23% explainable, I have no idea. That's what I've found in Russian sources, anyway.

Also, the Toynbee Tiles mystery is pretty much solved if you trust "Duerr, Justin. Resurrect Dead: The Mystery of the Toynbee Tiles" as a source.

There are even more inconsistencies pointed out above. At first I've suspected that the scale is accidentally inverted, but D.B. Cooper story is pretty poorly explained, so it's more like the whole thing is just randomly messed up.
--[[User:Shnatsel|Shnatsel]] ([[User talk:Shnatsel|talk]]) 19:54, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

== UVB-76 ==

Is it seriously that hard to explain the "UVB-76" thing? I've been listening to this thing for a year now and even have explained how it works from the innards a few months back. Besides, it's not even called UVB-76, it was a mishear of UZB-76, and it's not even that callsign anymore. The callsign has changed to MDZhB and it is a marker to occupy the frequency of the "Codename Vulkan" communications channel. The way this thing works is that it is a bunch of gears that control a buzzer, when the Buzzer goes down you can hear it winding down and the repairmen screwing in some things when they come in.
[[Special:Contributions/108.162.219.9|108.162.219.9]] 20:49, 20 March 2015 (UTC)

Talk:1487: Tornado

2015-02-16T14:29:11Z

173.245.56.202:

Is there any point in including "like most amusement rides, it is for children"? I don't know about others but most of the amusement parks near me are for late teens-twenties. They all have a childrens section but it is pretty tiny. --[[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.202|173.245.56.202]] 14:29, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

Are we sure this is cueball? it seems like it might be just a generic newscaster cartoon.
[[User:Reywas|Reywas]] ([[User talk:Reywas|talk]]) 07:41, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

Can a weather expert verify the claim that a tornado will destroy a merry-go-round? From what little I read and understood (Weather is confusing, and there was no graph!), a F0 or F1 tornado would not destroy it. From my estimations, a merry-go-round weighs 1350kg (2976.24054 lbs). Thanks, [[Special:Contributions/141.101.106.95|141.101.106.95]] 08:53, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

Another type of "merry-go-round" is a very common playground device, much simpler than the type with seats or horses. This https://smilekiddo.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/zipline_merry-go-round.jpg is what I envisioned from the comic, although it could refer to either type. The freely-rotating small platform, usually with bars for children to hold onto while standing, and rotated merely by people-power, is probably the most common type of merry-go-round in the US. They may weigh from 500 to 2000 lbs, or mass from about 15 to 60 slugs (I'll assume xkcd readers can convert to other mass units if desired.) [[User:Taibhse|Taibhse]] ([[User talk:Taibhse|talk]]) 09:24, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

I think tornado can destroy the merry-go-round of either type and STILL make it a fun ride. The part of "no injuries" is the suspicious one. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 10:25, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

Wait, what I got from this comic is the classical mass media sensationalism joke, there is no tornado, they simply invented one by taking a merry go round as one, that's why the victims say "Fun and Awesome", they interviewed the kids as victims while they were just enjoying the ride. The title text does the same, with the difference they went further this time, as trying to pass a teacup ride as a multi-vortex tornado is even more hilarious. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.103.206|141.101.103.206]] 11:29, 16 February 2015 (UTC)

1256: Questions

2015-02-13T04:51:23Z

173.245.56.202: /* Section Ten */

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}
A larger version of the picture can be found [http://xkcd.com/1256/large/ here]
.
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Many questions unanswered.}}
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon".

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
The tables below have been created so as to split the comic into almost entirely arbitrary blocks, which have then been identified with similarly arbitrary numbers. As a general rule, section numbers work top to bottom, then right to left.
===Illustrated Panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||Arms stop growing because longer arms would not be a very useful way to spend resources. Human DNA has programmed the body to gradually ossify the growing arms and legs, closing the epiphyseal plate, at which point these extremities stop growing.
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||There is no hard evidence of ghosts.
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||Squirrels exist because they fit their biological niche better than any other species.
|-
|Why is sex so important?||Sex is important because it is the primary method of reproduction in many different species.
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe, Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards like Harry won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns; a revolver can't shoot lightning or summon items or teleport its user. Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his Muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is a series of children's books (which usually don't include guns) set in the United Kingdom (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}

===Section One===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? || To the whale, it's like going into outer space!
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?|| Often, these are used by couples to view themselves during coitus.
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company. However, if Game Freak were to develop a Pokémon MMO the MMOs would be strong competition against the console games and therefore reducing the Pokémon demographic significantly.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?|| Highway/freeway {{w|noise barrier|noise barriers}} sometimes have doors in them to allow workers access to both sides of the barrier.
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?|| To add atmosphere and to give players hints when there is a dark cave nearby. See [http://minecraft.gamepedia.com/Ambience Minecraft Wiki].
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||There are certain people who are more respected and well-known than other people, whether it be because of their acting career, major advancements to science, or a sex tape.
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being venomous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||{{w|Creation of a pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}. {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||An old folk remedy for {{w|gonorrhea}} was to clap on the sides of the penis.
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?|| The question relates to the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?" However, they most likely remain "friends" because they are in the same class at school and are therefore "forced" to be around one another.
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||{{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters|Aang}} is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||This likely refers to imessage chat being blue. These messages are blue when sending a message to another apple device.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||Because some people buy them. Mustaches, especially handlebar-style mustaches, were a popular fad at the time of this comic.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||Fuzzy pink mustaches are used to designate cars in the {{w|Lyft}} service.
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||See {{w|Movember}}
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||There are an estimated [http://oh.audubon.org/bsc/SOTB.html 400 bird species] in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_birds_of_Ohio Ohio], but there are [http://www.jstor.org/discover/2419997sid=21104910103541&uid=4&uid=3739776&uid=2&uid=3739256 2.74 nesting pairs per acre].
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?|| {{w|lake_effect|Lake-effect}} rain develops in the same manner as lake-effect snow.
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section Two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?|| In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them. An alternative hypothesis is that they want to hug/touch their loved ones one last time.
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||Blood moves through veins due to irregular pressure from skeletal muscles combined with valves to control direction. In varicose veins these valves malfunction affecting blood flow. In arteries blood flow is produced directly from pressure caused by the heart.
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?|| {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||Programming is the art of writing instructions for a computer to do. Since the computer has a limited set of instructions for you to use it involves a new way of thinking for many. It is also hard because the computer itself is not smart or adaptable to unexpected problems. For instance when a human is told to sort books in a shelf, he or she can do that despite there might be things in the way (he or she will just move it to the side). A computer generally just crash if it doesn't have instructions on how to deal with the unexcepted problem.
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?|| A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, Wikipedia's {{w|Zero-ohm link}} article gives sufficient explanation.
|-
|Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||The brain enjoys repetition especially in music.
|-
|Why do trees die?||Some common reasons include lack of water, lack of nitrogen in the soil and being chopped down.
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||Some stations broadcast a {{w|second audio program}}, an alternative sound track that your TV can be configured to use instead of the primary program. This is intended to be used for broadcasting in an alternate language, or for {{w|Descriptive Video Service}} to make a program accessible to the visually impaired. Many programs that don't actually use SAP will still broadcast an SAP that is identical to the primary program; however, this is not required. If your TV is configured to use SAP and a particular channel isn't broadcasting SAP at that time, there won't be any sound.
|-
|Why aren't Pokémon real?||Pokémon are fantasised creatures that were designed to produce an interesting battle mechanic in a game. Some of the pokémons abilities would be impossible on earth as we know it. For instance, Magcargo is hotter than the surface of the sun<ref name="Bulbapedia Magcargo"> [[http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Magcargo#Trivia|Magcargo]]</ref>.
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?|| Most dreams occur during a stage known as REM (Rapid Eye Movement). During REM, your brain is highly active and its wave pattern is the same as the wave patterns in a person who is awake. It should be noted that dreams can occur during other stages of sleep but most dreams that are vivid occur during the REM stage.
|-
|}

===Section Three===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do testicles move?|| The scrotum shrinks and expands to account for temperature changes.
|-
| Why are there psychics?|| Psychics are humans who supposedly have supernatural abilities to know things. A better question would be to ask why do people suppose there are psychics.
|-
| Why are hats so expensive?|| Hats can be expensive depending on the quality of material, size, location, and demand. A probable answer is that hats are simply difficult to make, causing high prices.
|-
| Why is there caffeine in my shampoo?|| Because the producers want you to believe that caffeine penetrates the hair roots and thereby somehow protects it from negative testosterone impacts and from premature hair loss.
|-
| Why do your boobs hurt?|| The most probable reason is that your bra doesn't fit correctly. It could also be a hormone imbalance or awkwardly shaped breasts.
|}

===Section Four===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why aren't economists rich? || Economists study how laws of self-interest bring about an efficient allocation of resources. In order to become rich, one has to enter a market seeking profit by trading or producing goods or services.
|-
| Why do Americans call it soccer? || {{w|Association Football}} is called Soccer in the USA because {{w|American Football}} is the more popular version there.
|-
| Why are my ears ringing? || {{w|Tinnitus}}, or ringing of the ears, can result from stress, foreign objects in the ear, hearing damage, wax build up, or any other number of causes.
|-
| Why are there so many Avengers? ||The number of Avengers has [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Avengers_members varied greatly] over the years and decades, each time with it's own justification for why they need to work together, but the simplest answer is money. Cross-branding and cross-merchandising is successful to the brand and brings in new readers, plus creates a new franchise to profit from.
|-
|Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
|Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|}

===Section Five===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|-
| Why is Earth tilted? || The Earth is not tilted. Axial tilt is just a result of conservation of momentum when the Earth was formed, because not everything orbits in the same way. It is pure happenstance that Earth's axis is not normal to its plane of orbit.
|-
| Why is space black? || What we call black is the absence of light. Space is mostly empty. Whe we look at a part of space where there is nothing that can reflect the stars' light, it consequently appears black to us.
|-
| Why is outer space so cold? || Space is not cold. There is no matter in space. However, most of space has very little radiation hitting it, so a person won't recieve any energy, but will still radiate some away, resulting in a net loss of energy, colloquially "heat."
|-
| Why are there pyramids on the moon? || There are no pyramids on the moon.
|-
| Why is NASA shutting down? ||NASA isn't shutting down. This question might have something to do with the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_federal_government_shutdown_of_2013 Government Shutdown of 2013] or perhaps due to the then-current shuttle program ending, but that is not the entirety of NASA.
|}

===Section <strike>Spider</strike> Six===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there tiny spiders in my house?
|rowspan="6"|During autumn in particular male spiders reaching maturing will set off to find a mate. By chance they may end up in your house. When encountering spiders in large numbers, it is more likely that they are young from the same female spider. Females lay {{w|Spider#Reproduction_and_life_cycle|up to 3,000}} eggs at a time. These questions also plays off of Munroe's longstanding fear of spiders, especialy the [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/8:_Red_spiders red spiders] mentioned in [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/Category:Red_Spiders several early comics].
|-
| Why do spiders come inside?
|-
| Why are there huge spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there lots of spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there spiders in my room?
|-
| Why are there so many spiders in my room?
|-
| Why do spider bites itch? ||This mostly happens as a immune response to [http://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/stories/why-do-mosquito-bites-itch histamines] under the skin which are injected through saliva.
|-
| Why is dying so scary? ||Part of human nature is the fear of the unknown, and death is the ultimate unknown because it is not knowable until it's experienced, and there is nobody to report what the result was. This leaves it open to speculation, and many major religions are based on preparing ones soul for death. Also, dying would leave loved ones families with the responsibility of taking care of their remains and finances. And finally, most people don't want to die, living for as long as possible, possibly because the unknown is too unbearable to cope with. Still though several people are not afraid of death and dying, and recognize life is short and to cherish each moment while we can. Death is inevitable, so we should not fear it.
|-
| Why is there no GPS in laptops? ||It is not impossible for laptops to have a GPS, and some do. But there are [http://security.stackexchange.com/questions/50907/are-there-gps-tracker-for-laptops design difficulties] that have to be overcome including battery draining, room within the crowded device to place a receiver, WiFi can give a location just as well, and the product casing could interfere with its ability to functional normally and receive the signals necessary to operate as intended. Some Dell computers have these, but the privacy one needs to give up to accept the terms and conditions makes it unfavorable.
|-
| Why do knees click? ||
|-
| Why aren't there E grades? ||E grades [http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/e-f-grading-scale/ actually exist] in some districts, but they are rare. In their long and bizarre history, E was originally used where F is today (E was the lowest grade), but in those systems, students often received E's for an "Excellent" grade, creating much confusion. F was used in place instead and E was eliminated from a standard grading scale.
|-
| Why is isolation bad? ||Isolation is when a person deliberately secludes themselves away from others, often far-removed from society. This can happen in locations as small as a city apartment and as large as the open woods. People evolved as social animals and it is generally held that those who isolate themselves suffer from depression or other forms of psychological imbalance. Of course society can trigger many of these imbalances causing an individual to isolate themselves. Isolation is often seen as therapeutic so people can spend time with themselves constructively, often finding peace within themselves and through mediation. Monks and hermits generally live in solitude as well. Many people view a decision to be isolated as noble, and others as healthy. While general interaction is largely healthy, in the crowded modern world, isolation is neither good or bad; it depends on the person and what that isolation does to them.
|-
| Why do boys like me? ||Attraction comes in many forms: physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, among others. Many people will lie about what they like about you to get something else (money, sex, etc), but most are genuine. It is not possible to assert definitively why one person may like another person, and that is something that needs to be discussed openly and honestly with them and nobody else.
|-
| Why don't boys like me? ||Similar to the answer above about what makes one desirable to another, there are an equal number of factors that make one unappealing. This can include everything from physical appearance to how one treats others. If a person is rude and unfriendly, most people find that not-conducive to healthy relationship and avoid the person who is asking. Not being liked by someone you like however does not mean you're wrong or are a bad person and in most cases has to do with the person you are asking about.
|-
| Why is there always a Java update? ||[https://www.java.com/en/download/faq/whatis_java.xml Java] is a software that runs on most computers and mobile devices that is crucial to its security and stability. The reason why it always updates is because it needs to stay current with the ever-upgrading fleet of browsers, operating systems and software that supports Java. Additionally Java updates itself so each version can run optimally. Software coding and debugging is a never-ending process towards perfectly stable releases.
|-
| Why are there red dots on my thighs? ||
|-
| Why is lying good? ||Lying and other forms of dishonesty is typically seen as bad because it lowers one's credibility and makes them less likely to be trusted in the future. It is almost always advantageous to tell the truth, as lies have a way of escalating as you need to keep expanding on the lie to cover your tracks. There are instances however where lying may be used in more noble circumstances. For example, if a friend asks your opinion on something they have made (such as a poem or painting) that you do not like, it is okay to tell them you like it because protecting their feelings and your relationship is more important than how you feel. Often military personnel are trained to keep national security secrets at all costs and will lie about what they know to save themselves and the country.
|}

===Section Seven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there slaves in the bible? ||Slavery was viewed differently in the early years of human civilization before the contemporary moral and ethical conversations began centuries later. The [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bible_and_slavery bible justified slavery] for a number of reasons, notably to pay off some sort of debt. Slaves were seen as property and their work provided value to the slave owner. Similarly slave owners rationalized their ownership through scripture, pointing out that it was in the Bible and therefore okay with God.
|-
| Why do twins have different fingerprints? || Fingerprints are not only from the DNA, but from the conditions in the womb which differ from child to child.
|-
| Why are Americans afraid of dragons? ||This question was the title of a [http://blogs.sfu.ca/courses/spring2012/engl387/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Why-are-Americans-Afraid-of-Dragons.docx 1974 essay] by Ursula K. LeGeuin in which she makes a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semiotics semiotic] analysis of dragon mythology. She argues that our belief in dragons (and those outside of America as well) stems from childhood, much like other ferocious fictional creatures such as goblins and hobbits, but many hold onto these fears as a way of avoiding reality. In her closing argument, she writes, "They know that its truth challenges, even threatens, all that is false, all that is phony, unnecessary, and trivial in the life they have let themselves be forced into living. They are afraid of dragons, because they are afraid of freedom."
|-
| Why is HTTPS crossed out in red? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a line through HTTPS? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook? || Facebook has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is HTTPS important? || For security reasons, as a site with HTTPS has encrypted traffic.
|}

===Section Eight===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there swarms of gnats? || The reason gnats (and other creatures) tend to swarm together is likely a safety-in-numbers protection, and as a big gathering to find a mate.
|-
| Why is there phlegm? ||{{w|Phlegm#Phlegm|Phlegm}} is a thick, viscous fluid produced by the mucus membranes as a way to clear the airway and aids in the release of bacteria, disease and debris in those passages.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [Steve Duffy, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for geese. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried lasers and bullhorns — hey, get out of here, you crows — and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}.
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type like Mr. Mime are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears, which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as.
|-
| Why do children get cancer? ||{{w|Cancer}} is an aggressive and often fatal disease that has the potential to affect all humans as well as other organisms. There are multiple types of cancer, each with their own epidemiology, but children are not immune to succumbing to the horrific effects of the disease. Children are human beings and are subject to the same illnesses adults have, regardless of age, or their innocence. There is no divine or supernatural explanation for this. Simply put, life is a battle for all humans regardless of how small they are.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}} The Odyssey also says that before sailing, the crew forgot to offer a sacrifice as was ordained.
|-
| Why is there ice in space? || Space is {{w|Outer_space#Environment|Cold}}. The background radiation, which is used to measure the temperature of space's vacuum, is estimated at about 3K (−270 °C; −454 °F). Water freezes at 273.15 K (0ºC; 32ºF). Because the temperature in space is less than the freezing point of water, liquids freeze in space, turning into ice.
|}

===Section <strike>Owl</strike> Nine===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there an owl in my back yard? || Owls can be seen all over the world, and live in a wide variety of habitats. They are mainly noctural, and spend a large portion of the night hunting. The owl in your back yard is likely looking for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl outside my window? || As with the question above, the owl is likely to be hunting for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl on the dollar bill? || On the front of a dollar bill, near the upper right '1' is a tiny section of the design which can be seen to represent an owl. Conspiracy theorists will note that owls were symbolically linked to the Masons, while others will instead see a spider.
|-
| Why do owls attack people? || While owls and human often live in close proximity without problems, as with other species, owls may attack if they feel threatened. When people irritate or otherwise make owls feel unsafe, they retaliate with violence to protect themselves.
|-
| Why are AK47s so expensive? || The market value of an AK47 varies depending on where in the world you live. With strict gun control laws, obtaining an AK47 in the UK is likely to be more expensive due to the risks involved for those supplying the weapon. In ex-soviet countries and the middle east, AK47s are more plentiful, and hence the price is likely to be lower.
|-
| Why are there helicopters circling my house? ||This question is likely a joke because it is so incongruous to the others in this section. The joke is that people would be Googling about owls attacking people and assault rifle prices, which could, ostensibly alert authorities to come to your house to arrest you. If this is not the case, then the helicopter could be there for myriad reasons.
|}

===Section Ten===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there gods? ||All gods and goddesses man made and are part of ancient and fictional mythology and folklore that are used to give spiritual guidance and explanations for phenomenons that were yet unexplained by natural processes. Lightning for example was thought to be produced by Zeus, King of all Greek Gods.
|-
|Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why is Mt Vesuvius there? ||The simple answer is that volcanoes are created by interactions where the Earth's tectonic plates meet. These conditions only exist in a few places on Earth. The question could also be asking, "why is Mt Vesuvius near such a heavily populated area?" Humans have lived near Vesuvius throughout history, due to its pleasant climate, rich soil, and proximity to other major cities. The Italian government [http://www.theguardian.com/world/2003/jun/05/italy.sophiearie offers generous cash incentives] to move people away from the danger zone, but finds few takers.This question could also be a reference to mountaineer [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Mallory George Mallory]'s famous answer as to why he wanted to climb Mount Everest: "Because it's there."
|-
| Why do they say T minus? || Time before the launch of a spacecraft is denoted as T minus because the launch has not happened yet. Any time after the launched is stated without the minus, for example T 3 seconds, so time before the launch can be seen as "minus" time. The T stands for "Test" or "Time".
|-
| Why are there obelisks? || [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obelisk Obeiliks article has more]
|-
| Why are wrestlers always wet? || Professional wrestling is strenuous activity, whether its fake or not. Strenuous activity results in sweat, giving the bodyan appearance of being wet. Greco-roman wrestling and Turkish Oil Wrestling both involve oiling the body, giving a similar appearance.
|-
| Why are oceans becoming more acidic? ||
|-
| Why is Arwen dying? || Because Peter Jackson wanted to give Aragorn manpain
|-
| Why aren't my quail laying eggs? || Have you tried turning them off and on again?
|-
| Why aren't my quail eggs hatching? || Problems in incubation, probably.
|-
|Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state, but Hawaii was still a fundamental part of the United States as it was an incorporated territory.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|}

===Section Eleven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are my boobs itchy? ||It could be anything from dry skin to a rare life-threatening disease. Could also be related to pregnancy, PMS, or puberty. [http://www.just-health.net/Itchy-Breast.html Here's a thorough list] of possible causes and remedies.
|-
| Why are cigarettes legal? ||Despite the obvious detrimental affects nicotine has on health, like caffeine and alcohol, it is easy to regulate. Substances like marijuana and other drugs are mainly illegal because the government and regulatory agencies have no control over their production and distribution and therefore cannot profit from it. Nicotine however, which is the key ingredient in tobacco can be regulated and taxed and is.
|-
| Why are there ducks in my pool? ||Most likely, they're looking for a place to mate. Which means you'll soon have baby ducks in your pool. Most migratory birds are protected by wildlife laws, so you want to prevent them from moving into your pool in the first place. The [http://www.dfwwildlife.org/duck.html DFW Wildlife Coalition] has some tips.
|-
| Why is Jesus white? ||This is an ethnocentric viewpoint that varies throughout cultures. In African cultures he is portrayed as black. In short, whatever culture he is introduced to, those inhabitants will have him fit their own image.
|-
| Why is there liquid in my ear? ||[http://www.healthline.com/symptom/discharge-from-ear It's called otorrhea], and can be caused by infection, trauma, or changes in pressure. A common cause is [http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/swimmers-ear/basics/definition/con-20014723 Swimmer's ear], an infection of the outer ear canal.
|-
| Why do Q tips feel good? ||The inner ear contains [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erectile_tissue erectile tissue] (as does your inner nose which is why sneezing feels good) so you are massing tissue which gets aroused upon stimulation.
|-
| Why do good people die? ||Everybody dies, but loved ones and ones who were known to make memorable or valuable contributions are mourned and revered more than a person who has left much pain to others as their legacy; we remember the good ones and that's why it hurts more.
|-
| Why are ultrasounds important? ||Ultrasound scans provide a great deal of information about a fetus, thus increasing the chances of a healthy birth. They have many other medical uses.
|-
| Why are ultrasound machines expensive? ||As hospital equipment goes, ultrasound machines are actually a bargain. [http://www.costowl.com/healthcare/healthcare-ultrasound-machine-costs.html A new ultrasound machine] costs about $20,000-$75,000, depending on features. Comparable devices are much more expensive: The [http://info.blockimaging.com/bid/84432/CT-Scanner-Price-Guide CT scanner] runs $90,000-$250,000, while the [http://www.ehow.com/about_4731161_much-do-mri-machines-cost.html MRI machine] easily goes over a million.
|-
| Why is stealing wrong? ||Stealing is theft and it is illegal. Taking something that is not yours without permission or payment hurts the livelihood of other individuals as well as damages their trust in others.
|}

===Vertical Questions===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there hell if god forgives? ||There is not a single answer to this question. The answer varies based on the religion and that religion's sect mixed with personal interpretations of that religions scripture and how a person decides to follow it. However the idea of what Hell will be like also varies. There is no one answer to this question, but the easiest explanation is that the individual did not pray hard enough, correctly, was not part of the right religion, and their forgiveness was contingent on something that the person either did not do or know to do (or say or think)
|-
| Why do iguanas die? ||All living things die, but iguanas may suffer from [http://www.anapsid.org/iguana/kidneyfailure.html kidney failure].
|-
| Why is GPS free? || GPS was originally developed by the U.S. military for its own use, not for commercial purposes. Once the satellites were launched and service began, anyone could receive the signals. Because it is a one-way transmission, there is no incremental cost to provide service to more users, and no practical way to prevent use without payment.
|-
| Why are trees tall? ||Tall is a relative term, and Redwoods are famous for their height - among the tallest in the world. The reason for this is, in part [http://www.nps.gov/redw/faqs.htm climate, fog, rain, good soil, few predators, among others].
|-
|Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why is there lava? ||Lava is simply magma (molten rock) which has been ejected from volcanoes. Once it is flowing on land, it is called lava. Magma is heated by the earth's core to create a liquid surface under earth's crust that the land floats on. Sometimes it has to come out through faults and fissures (and volcanoes).
|-
| Why is YKK on a zippers? || YKK Group is the name of a large group of Japanese manufacturing companies, which among other things manufacture a lot of zippers.
|-
| Why is life so boring? ||It is up to an individual to find meaning and interest in life. Monotony, predictability and lack of physical and intellectual stimulation would lead to a feeling of boredom.
|-
| Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts? ||Ghosts are a supernatural phenomenon that have not been empirically proven to exist. Those who believe in ghosts implicitly believe in a soul (of which a ghost is a materialization of), and it is a commonly held belief by religious institutions and ghost-hunters that animals do not have souls and thus dinosaurs would not have any either.
|-
|Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man, and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned. Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why do I feel dizzy? ||Balance is achieved from fluids in the inner-ear, but [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dizziness#Epidemiology dizziness] can have nearly a dozen causes.]
|-
| Why are dogs afraid of fireworks? ||Loud noises can trigger their flight or fight responses when they are [http://www.cesarsway.com/dogbehavior/hyperdog/How-to-Keep-Your-Dog-Safe-and-Calm-During-Fireworks nervous].
|-
| Why are there weeks? || Weeks were originally important for religious reasons, primarily the requirement to observe a sabbath (day of rest) every seventh day. Today it is used to evenly divide months into equal pieces, much like the months divide a year. Similarly, hours and minutes divide a day.
|}

<references/>

==Transcript==
:[This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. These are described at the end. Questions are given in roughly columnar order. None of the questions have question marks.]

:Questions found in Google Autocomplete

:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after HTTP
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arraow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:Why do testicles move
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:Why is there caffeine in my shampoo
:Why do your boobs hurt
:Why aren't economists rich
:Why do Americans call it soccer
:Why are my ears ringing
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:Why is space black
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the moon
:Why is NASA shutting down
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:Why do spiders come inside
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:Why do knees click
:Why aren't there E grades
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good
:Why is GPS free
:Why are trees tall
:Why are there slaves in the Bible
:Why do twins have different fingerprints
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons
:Why is there lava
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:Why is there phlegm
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:Why is psychic weak to bug
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space
:Why are there female Mr Mimes
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:Why is there an owl on the dollar bill
:Why do owls attack people
:Why are AK47s so expensive
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America
:Why is life so boring
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are there ducks in my pool
:Why is Jesus white
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:Why are ultrasounds important
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong
:Why is YKK on all zippers
:Why is HTTPS crossed out in red
:Why is there a line through HTTPS
:Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook
:Why is HTTPS important
:Why are there weeks
:Why do I feel dizzy
:Why are dogs afraid of fireworks
:Why is there no king in England

:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing

:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts

:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels

:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important.

:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Google Search]]

1256: Questions

2015-02-13T04:50:51Z

173.245.56.202: /* Section Ten */ answering the unanswered, undeclaredly

{{comic
| number = 1256
| date = August 26, 2013
| title = Questions
| image = questions.png
| titletext = To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.
}}
A larger version of the picture can be found [http://xkcd.com/1256/large/ here]
.
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Many questions unanswered.}}
{{w|Google}}, a rather popular internet search engine, has a feature known as [https://support.google.com/websearch/answer/106230?hl=en autocomplete] that guesses at search queries before they are fully typed out. These guesses are generally made based on popular searches by other people. From time to time, a particularly strange or hilarious one may be found, as is evidenced in this comic.

The largest pictured questions are: "Why are there slaves in the bible" and "Why are there ants in my laptop".

All of the questions in the comic are "why" questions, so many of them are predicated on false assumptions, such as "Why are there pyramids on the moon".

Regarding the title text: in the Peter Jackson films of {{w|The Lord of the Rings (film series)|''The Lord of the Rings'' trilogy}}, Arwen becomes sickly for unspecified reasons as the plot advances, apparently giving Aragorn a more personal reason to fight. The only explanation given is by Elrond, who says "As Sauron's power grows, her [Arwen's] strength wanes." This subplot is entirely absent from the {{w|The Lord of the Rings|original novels}}.

From [http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0167260/faq#.2.1.21 IMDB]: <blockquote>
Arwen, like her father (and brothers) is considered to be a Half-Elf, the result of a union between an Elf and a mortal human. The Half-Elven of Middle-earth get a choice, to remain immortal and return to the West (Valinor) or to become mortal and to die as humans do. Elrond chose to remain an Elf. Arwen (like her uncle Elros) chooses to become mortal in order to wed and remain with Aragorn. Elrond senses this; this is what he means when he says that Arwen is dying. It is the same as in The Last Unicorn, when the unicorn is given the form of a human woman and can feel that she is no longer immortal ("I can feel this body dying all around me"). According to Tolkien, though, after Aragorn dies in the year 120 (Fourth Age), Arwen returns to Lórien, where she dies by choice the following winter. </blockquote>

==Selected answers==
The tables below have been created so as to split the comic into almost entirely arbitrary blocks, which have then been identified with similarly arbitrary numbers. As a general rule, section numbers work top to bottom, then right to left.
===Illustrated Panels===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why aren't my arms growing?||Arms stop growing because longer arms would not be a very useful way to spend resources. Human DNA has programmed the body to gradually ossify the growing arms and legs, closing the epiphyseal plate, at which point these extremities stop growing.
|-
|Why are there ghosts?||There is no hard evidence of ghosts.
|-
|Why are there squirrels?||Squirrels exist because they fit their biological niche better than any other species.
|-
|Why is sex so important?||Sex is important because it is the primary method of reproduction in many different species.
|-
| Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter? || In the {{w|Harry Potter}} universe, Muggle technology (human inventions) are often looked down on by wizards - the majority of half-blooded wizards like Harry won't touch one, let alone a wizard extremist like {{w|Voldemort}}. Not only does any Muggle device more complex than a wristwatch interfere with magical artifacts, but wands are usually more versatile than most guns; a revolver can't shoot lightning or summon items or teleport its user. Finally, while Harry himself may or may not consider using firearms due to his Muggle upbringing, ''Harry Potter'' is a series of children's books (which usually don't include guns) set in the United Kingdom (which has stricter gun laws than, say, the United States).
|-
|-
|}

===Section One===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do whales jump? || To the whale, it's like going into outer space!
|-
|Why are witches green? || See {{w|Wizard of Oz}}.
|-
|Why are there mirrors above beds?|| Often, these are used by couples to view themselves during coitus.
|-
|Why do I say Uh?||See ''[http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/05/06/the_odd_body_language_fillers/ Why do we say 'um', 'er', or 'ah' when we hesitate in speaking?]''.
|-
| Why is sea salt better? || The question likely refers to the difference between common {{w|Fortified table salt}} and usually more expensive sea salt. While the major part of both of these is sodium chloride (NaCl) the idea behind the claim is the different composition mostly in regards to trace elements of sea salt compared to "normal" salt. Table salt's composition is often influenced by a country's health department and thus addition of trace elements is regulated. While these regulations are based on scientific studies there remain to be debates concerning the additions, such as iodine.
|-
| Why are there trees in the middle of fields? || Many images of fields contain singular trees in the middle of them. While there exist such trees it is likely an artistic choice to give a more pleasing or aesthetically satisfying image compared to just a field. In modern agriculture those would in fact be quite troublesome since they are a hindrance to large machines used and a new tree would be unlikely to grow in a constantly worked field.
|-
| Why is there not a Pokémon MMO? || {{w|Pokémon}} is a popular franchise, spanning game consoles, anime series, a trading card game, and many other things. Among fans, it is a frequent topic of discussion why a Pokémon {{w|massively multiplayer online game}} has not been officially announced by the series' developers {{w|Game Freak}}, as they often [http://www.dorkly.com/comic/52546/be-careful-what-you-wish-for predict] that such a game would be extremely popular, and bring in massive revenue for the company. However, if Game Freak were to develop a Pokémon MMO the MMOs would be strong competition against the console games and therefore reducing the Pokémon demographic significantly.
|-
|Why is there laughing in TV shows? || Sitcoms were once filmed with an audience, so the actors could respond to their reactions. That's the historical reason why there were laughs in TV shows. The tradition continues, with the difference that now the laughter mostly comes from recorded tapes. See {{w|Laugh track}}.
|-
|Why are there doors on the freeway?|| Highway/freeway {{w|noise barrier|noise barriers}} sometimes have doors in them to allow workers access to both sides of the barrier.
|-
|Why are there so many svchost.exe running?||See {{w|svchost.exe}}.
|-
| Why aren't there any countries in Antarctica? || {{w|Antarctica}} is the southern most continent and is by large covered in ice and in general pretty cold. While it is a regular target of tourists and researchers it also lacks native human inhabitants. At the moment, the territorial claims concerning Antarctica are mostly handled via the {{w|Antarctic Treaty System}}. In short there are a few countries who claim certain parts of the continent as their own in theory but so far it is considered neutral territory and most maps don't concern themselves with displaying the (in some regards disputed) territorial claims because they do not matter at this point in time. If there are ever any worthwhile resources discovered, this might change.
|-
|Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft?|| To add atmosphere and to give players hints when there is a dark cave nearby. See [http://minecraft.gamepedia.com/Ambience Minecraft Wiki].
|-
|Why is there kicking in my stomach?||See ''[http://www.webmd.com/baby/fetal-movement-feeling-baby-kick Feeling Your Baby Kick]''. Here, ''stomach'' means ''abdomen''.
|-
|Why are there two slashes after http?||See ''[http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1220286/Sir-Tim-Berners-Lee-admits-forward-slashes-web-address-mistake.html Sir Tim Berners-Lee admits the forward slashes in every web address 'were a mistake']''.
|-
|Why are there celebrities?||There are certain people who are more respected and well-known than other people, whether it be because of their acting career, major advancements to science, or a sex tape.
|-
|Why do snakes exist?|| The question is rather general and likely based on a widespread dislike for the reptilians. Be it due to their appearance, their spread, or the danger a few snakes pose to humans (often due to being venomous) many people have a dislike for snakes and would prefer them to not exist (similar to spiders).
In regards to "why do snakes exist on earth?": Because evolution. Snakes fill a gap in the ecosystem as predators and hunt different species, including vermin. Snakes are in that regard similar to many other predatory animals. The question on why snakes developed with their distinct streamlined shape is still debated but {{w|snakes|likely it either provided an advantage when burrowing or swimming}}.
|-
|Why do oysters have pearls?||{{w|Creation of a pearl|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Pearls are formed inside the shell of certain mollusks as a defense mechanism against a potentially threatening irritant such as a parasite inside the shell, or an attack from outside, injuring the mantle tissue. The mollusk creates a pearl sac to seal off the irritation. Pearls are commonly viewed by scientists as a by-product of an adaptive immune system-like function.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are ducks called ducks?||See {{w|Duck#Etymology}}. {{W|wikt:duck|According to Wiktionary}}, the noun ''duck'' can be traced back to the {{w|Proto-Germanic language|Proto-Germanic}} word {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Germanic/dūkaną|''dūkaną''}} ("to dive, bend down"), and, in turn, the {{w|Proto-Indo-European language|Proto-Indo-European}} {{w|wikt:Appendix:Proto-Indo-European/dʰewb-|''dʰewb-''}} ("deep, hollow"), which is the origin of the verb ''to duck''. The link between the noun and the verb comes from ducks' tendency to dive under water for short periods of time.
|-
|Why do they call it the clap?||An old folk remedy for {{w|gonorrhea}} was to clap on the sides of the penis.
|-
|Why are Kyle and Cartman friends?|| The question relates to the TV show {{w|South Park}}. Both are children living in the small titular town in Colorado. Cartman is widely accepted to a be very bad person, one of his many character flaws being his antisemitism. Kyle on the other hand is a Jew. However, both, along with two other kids, Stan and Kenny, are the core focus of the show (or used to be) and to some extent are considered to be friends. While there are episodes which show Cartman being not entirely a horrible person and him holding Kyle in a position of at least a worthy adversary, most of the time the question should be "Why is anyone friends with Cartman?" However, they most likely remain "friends" because they are in the same class at school and are therefore "forced" to be around one another.
|-
|Why is there an arrow on Aang's head?||{{w|Avatar: The Last Airbender#Characters|Aang}} is the main character of the TV series {{w|Avatar the last Airbender|Avatar - The last Airbender}} and features as part of a large body spanning tattoo an arrow on his head. These tattoos are made to replicate the markings of one of the shows fictional animals, the air bison which are regarded as the original air benders. They are given to human air benders once they attain the status of masters. Because Aang acquired this status very early in life he was already tattooed accordingly.
|-
|Why are text messages blue?||This likely refers to imessage chat being blue. These messages are blue when sending a message to another apple device.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on clothes?||Because some people buy them. Mustaches, especially handlebar-style mustaches, were a popular fad at the time of this comic.
|-
|Why are there mustaches on cars?||Fuzzy pink mustaches are used to designate cars in the {{w|Lyft}} service.
|-
|Why are there mustaches everywhere?||See {{w|Movember}}
|-
|Why are there so many birds in Ohio?||There are an estimated [http://oh.audubon.org/bsc/SOTB.html 400 bird species] in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_birds_of_Ohio Ohio], but there are [http://www.jstor.org/discover/2419997sid=21104910103541&uid=4&uid=3739776&uid=2&uid=3739256 2.74 nesting pairs per acre].
|-
|Why is there so much rain in Ohio?|| {{w|lake_effect|Lake-effect}} rain develops in the same manner as lake-effect snow.
|-
|Why is Ohio weather so weird?||See {{w|Lake-effect snow}}.
|-
|}

===Section Two===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there male and female bikes? || {{w|bicycle|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>Historically, women's bicycle frames had a top tube that connected in the middle of the seat tube instead of the top, resulting in a lower {{w|Frame geometry|standover height}} at the expense of compromised structural integrity, since this places a strong bending load in the seat tube, and bicycle frame members are typically weak in bending. This design, referred to as a '''''{{w|step-through frame}}''''' or as an ''open frame'', allows the rider to mount and dismount in a dignified way while wearing a skirt or dress.</blockquote>
|-
|Why are there bridesmaids?||See {{w|Bridesmaid#Origin and history}}.
|-
|Why do dying people reach up?|| In many works of fiction dying people are regarded with an outstretched arm, grasping for unseen objects towards the sky. In all likelihood this originates in the idea of heaven as the place where (good) people go after death. People "reach for the light" which is seen when dying according to similar beliefs or possibly for already dead relatives or other associated people waiting for them. An alternative hypothesis is that they want to hug/touch their loved ones one last time.
|-
|Why aren't there varicose arteries?||Blood moves through veins due to irregular pressure from skeletal muscles combined with valves to control direction. In varicose veins these valves malfunction affecting blood flow. In arteries blood flow is produced directly from pressure caused by the heart.
|-
|Why are old Klingons different?|| {{w|Klingon Redesign|From Wikipedia}}: <blockquote>For {{w|Star Trek: The Motion Picture}} (1979), the Klingons were retconned and their appearance and behavior radically changed. To give the aliens a more sophisticated and threatening demeanor, the Klingons were depicted with ridged foreheads, snaggled and prominent teeth, and a defined language and alphabet. Lee Cole, a production designer, used red gels and primitive shapes in the design of Klingon consoles and ship interiors, which took on a dark and moody atmosphere. The alphabet was designed as angular, with sharp edges harkening to the Klingon's militaristic focus.[5] Costume designer Robert Fletcher created new uniforms for the Klingons, reminiscent of feudal Japanese armor.</blockquote>
|-
|Why is programming so hard?||Programming is the art of writing instructions for a computer to do. Since the computer has a limited set of instructions for you to use it involves a new way of thinking for many. It is also hard because the computer itself is not smart or adaptable to unexpected problems. For instance when a human is told to sort books in a shelf, he or she can do that despite there might be things in the way (he or she will just move it to the side). A computer generally just crash if it doesn't have instructions on how to deal with the unexcepted problem.
|-
|Why is there a 0 Ohm resistor?|| A resistor is usually designed to create a certain resistance, measured in {{w|Ohm}} in an electronic device. A 0 Ohm resistor seems pointless as it would only provide the same resistance as a normal cable. However, Wikipedia's {{w|Zero-ohm link}} article gives sufficient explanation.
|-
|Why do Americans hate soccer? || Soccer, or football in British English, is rather unpopular in the USA compared to most other regions of the world. Finding a particular reason behind the (dis)like for certain sports, apart from cultural spread, is difficult. One possible explanation is soccer's tendency to have far fewer points scored in an average game and a higher likelihood of draws compared to such things as American Football, basketball or baseball, which are far more popular. In how far this is a legitimate argument for regarding soccer as "less interesting" is up to debate.
|-
|Why do rhymes sound good?||The brain enjoys repetition especially in music.
|-
|Why do trees die?||Some common reasons include lack of water, lack of nitrogen in the soil and being chopped down.
|-
|Why is there no sound on CNN?||Some stations broadcast a {{w|second audio program}}, an alternative sound track that your TV can be configured to use instead of the primary program. This is intended to be used for broadcasting in an alternate language, or for {{w|Descriptive Video Service}} to make a program accessible to the visually impaired. Many programs that don't actually use SAP will still broadcast an SAP that is identical to the primary program; however, this is not required. If your TV is configured to use SAP and a particular channel isn't broadcasting SAP at that time, there won't be any sound.
|-
|Why aren't Pokémon real?||Pokémon are fantasised creatures that were designed to produce an interesting battle mechanic in a game. Some of the pokémons abilities would be impossible on earth as we know it. For instance, Magcargo is hotter than the surface of the sun<ref name="Bulbapedia Magcargo"> [[http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Magcargo#Trivia|Magcargo]]</ref>.
|-
|Why aren't bullets sharp?||See {{w|Terminal ballistics}}.
|-
|Why do dreams seem so real?|| Most dreams occur during a stage known as REM (Rapid Eye Movement). During REM, your brain is highly active and its wave pattern is the same as the wave patterns in a person who is awake. It should be noted that dreams can occur during other stages of sleep but most dreams that are vivid occur during the REM stage.
|-
|}

===Section Three===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why do testicles move?|| The scrotum shrinks and expands to account for temperature changes.
|-
| Why are there psychics?|| Psychics are humans who supposedly have supernatural abilities to know things. A better question would be to ask why do people suppose there are psychics.
|-
| Why are hats so expensive?|| Hats can be expensive depending on the quality of material, size, location, and demand. A probable answer is that hats are simply difficult to make, causing high prices.
|-
| Why is there caffeine in my shampoo?|| Because the producers want you to believe that caffeine penetrates the hair roots and thereby somehow protects it from negative testosterone impacts and from premature hair loss.
|-
| Why do your boobs hurt?|| The most probable reason is that your bra doesn't fit correctly. It could also be a hormone imbalance or awkwardly shaped breasts.
|}

===Section Four===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why aren't economists rich? || Economists study how laws of self-interest bring about an efficient allocation of resources. In order to become rich, one has to enter a market seeking profit by trading or producing goods or services.
|-
| Why do Americans call it soccer? || {{w|Association Football}} is called Soccer in the USA because {{w|American Football}} is the more popular version there.
|-
| Why are my ears ringing? || {{w|Tinnitus}}, or ringing of the ears, can result from stress, foreign objects in the ear, hearing damage, wax build up, or any other number of causes.
|-
| Why are there so many Avengers? ||The number of Avengers has [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Avengers_members varied greatly] over the years and decades, each time with it's own justification for why they need to work together, but the simplest answer is money. Cross-branding and cross-merchandising is successful to the brand and brings in new readers, plus creates a new franchise to profit from.
|-
|Why are the Avengers fighting the X Men || {{w|Avengers vs. X-Men}} was a 2012 Marvel crossover event that, like many other recent comic book events, had heroes fight other heroes. In this case, the {{w|Avengers (comics)|Avengers}} and the {{w|X-Men}} fought over the {{w|Phoenix Force (comics)|Phoenix Force}}, a godlike power that often possesses {{w|Jean Grey}} or her descendants (in this case, her alternate universe daughter Hope Summers). The Avengers believed the Phoenix Force is too powerful for humanity to control and wanted to contain it, while the X-Men believed the Phoenix was the messiah for mutants and could fix all of the Earth's problems.
|-
|Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers || Wolverine ''has'' been an Avenger, in some circumstances. e.g. in the {{w|The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes}} cartoon series, the episode ''New Avengers'' had Wolverine (along with Spiderman, War Machine, The Thing and Luke Cage and Iron Fist) substitute while the 'original' Avengers were unavailable to deal with the current crisis (which of course included the fate of the 'proper' Avengers). However, in general his anti-authority personality makes him a difficult team-member to field, and he has frequently disassociated himself even from the X-Men. But, in Avengers vs. X-Men (see above) Wolverine ''sided'' with The Avengers, and more modern treatments have even included the character in about as much a permanent a membership of the group as Logan is ever likely to have.

But if the question is about why Wolverine didn't appear in {{w|The Avengers (2012 film)|''The Avengers''}}, the answer is that ''The Avengers'' is being produced by Marvel/Disney, while Fox still has the rights to the X-Men and all Marvel mutants in general. Unless there is studio agreement, the two properties cannot cross, except through complicated machinations. For example, there are plans to bring Avengers mainstays Quicksilver and The Scarlet Witch to both the ''Avengers'' and ''X-Men'' franchises, but only the Fox films have the right to call them the children of Magneto, and Marvel/Disney cannot even identify them on-screen as "mutants".
|}

===Section Five===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
|Why are there ants in my laptop? || Ants usually come in your laptop when there are little crumbs of food. It is advised to get screen protectors.
|-
| Why is Earth tilted? || The Earth is not tilted. Axial tilt is just a result of conservation of momentum when the Earth was formed, because not everything orbits in the same way. It is pure happenstance that Earth's axis is not normal to its plane of orbit.
|-
| Why is space black? || What we call black is the absence of light. Space is mostly empty. Whe we look at a part of space where there is nothing that can reflect the stars' light, it consequently appears black to us.
|-
| Why is outer space so cold? || Space is not cold. There is no matter in space. However, most of space has very little radiation hitting it, so a person won't recieve any energy, but will still radiate some away, resulting in a net loss of energy, colloquially "heat."
|-
| Why are there pyramids on the moon? || There are no pyramids on the moon.
|-
| Why is NASA shutting down? ||NASA isn't shutting down. This question might have something to do with the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_federal_government_shutdown_of_2013 Government Shutdown of 2013] or perhaps due to the then-current shuttle program ending, but that is not the entirety of NASA.
|}

===Section <strike>Spider</strike> Six===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there tiny spiders in my house?
|rowspan="6"|During autumn in particular male spiders reaching maturing will set off to find a mate. By chance they may end up in your house. When encountering spiders in large numbers, it is more likely that they are young from the same female spider. Females lay {{w|Spider#Reproduction_and_life_cycle|up to 3,000}} eggs at a time. These questions also plays off of Munroe's longstanding fear of spiders, especialy the [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/8:_Red_spiders red spiders] mentioned in [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/Category:Red_Spiders several early comics].
|-
| Why do spiders come inside?
|-
| Why are there huge spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there lots of spiders in my house?
|-
| Why are there spiders in my room?
|-
| Why are there so many spiders in my room?
|-
| Why do spider bites itch? ||This mostly happens as a immune response to [http://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/stories/why-do-mosquito-bites-itch histamines] under the skin which are injected through saliva.
|-
| Why is dying so scary? ||Part of human nature is the fear of the unknown, and death is the ultimate unknown because it is not knowable until it's experienced, and there is nobody to report what the result was. This leaves it open to speculation, and many major religions are based on preparing ones soul for death. Also, dying would leave loved ones families with the responsibility of taking care of their remains and finances. And finally, most people don't want to die, living for as long as possible, possibly because the unknown is too unbearable to cope with. Still though several people are not afraid of death and dying, and recognize life is short and to cherish each moment while we can. Death is inevitable, so we should not fear it.
|-
| Why is there no GPS in laptops? ||It is not impossible for laptops to have a GPS, and some do. But there are [http://security.stackexchange.com/questions/50907/are-there-gps-tracker-for-laptops design difficulties] that have to be overcome including battery draining, room within the crowded device to place a receiver, WiFi can give a location just as well, and the product casing could interfere with its ability to functional normally and receive the signals necessary to operate as intended. Some Dell computers have these, but the privacy one needs to give up to accept the terms and conditions makes it unfavorable.
|-
| Why do knees click? ||
|-
| Why aren't there E grades? ||E grades [http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2014/02/e-f-grading-scale/ actually exist] in some districts, but they are rare. In their long and bizarre history, E was originally used where F is today (E was the lowest grade), but in those systems, students often received E's for an "Excellent" grade, creating much confusion. F was used in place instead and E was eliminated from a standard grading scale.
|-
| Why is isolation bad? ||Isolation is when a person deliberately secludes themselves away from others, often far-removed from society. This can happen in locations as small as a city apartment and as large as the open woods. People evolved as social animals and it is generally held that those who isolate themselves suffer from depression or other forms of psychological imbalance. Of course society can trigger many of these imbalances causing an individual to isolate themselves. Isolation is often seen as therapeutic so people can spend time with themselves constructively, often finding peace within themselves and through mediation. Monks and hermits generally live in solitude as well. Many people view a decision to be isolated as noble, and others as healthy. While general interaction is largely healthy, in the crowded modern world, isolation is neither good or bad; it depends on the person and what that isolation does to them.
|-
| Why do boys like me? ||Attraction comes in many forms: physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, among others. Many people will lie about what they like about you to get something else (money, sex, etc), but most are genuine. It is not possible to assert definitively why one person may like another person, and that is something that needs to be discussed openly and honestly with them and nobody else.
|-
| Why don't boys like me? ||Similar to the answer above about what makes one desirable to another, there are an equal number of factors that make one unappealing. This can include everything from physical appearance to how one treats others. If a person is rude and unfriendly, most people find that not-conducive to healthy relationship and avoid the person who is asking. Not being liked by someone you like however does not mean you're wrong or are a bad person and in most cases has to do with the person you are asking about.
|-
| Why is there always a Java update? ||[https://www.java.com/en/download/faq/whatis_java.xml Java] is a software that runs on most computers and mobile devices that is crucial to its security and stability. The reason why it always updates is because it needs to stay current with the ever-upgrading fleet of browsers, operating systems and software that supports Java. Additionally Java updates itself so each version can run optimally. Software coding and debugging is a never-ending process towards perfectly stable releases.
|-
| Why are there red dots on my thighs? ||
|-
| Why is lying good? ||Lying and other forms of dishonesty is typically seen as bad because it lowers one's credibility and makes them less likely to be trusted in the future. It is almost always advantageous to tell the truth, as lies have a way of escalating as you need to keep expanding on the lie to cover your tracks. There are instances however where lying may be used in more noble circumstances. For example, if a friend asks your opinion on something they have made (such as a poem or painting) that you do not like, it is okay to tell them you like it because protecting their feelings and your relationship is more important than how you feel. Often military personnel are trained to keep national security secrets at all costs and will lie about what they know to save themselves and the country.
|}

===Section Seven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there slaves in the bible? ||Slavery was viewed differently in the early years of human civilization before the contemporary moral and ethical conversations began centuries later. The [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Bible_and_slavery bible justified slavery] for a number of reasons, notably to pay off some sort of debt. Slaves were seen as property and their work provided value to the slave owner. Similarly slave owners rationalized their ownership through scripture, pointing out that it was in the Bible and therefore okay with God.
|-
| Why do twins have different fingerprints? || Fingerprints are not only from the DNA, but from the conditions in the womb which differ from child to child.
|-
| Why are Americans afraid of dragons? ||This question was the title of a [http://blogs.sfu.ca/courses/spring2012/engl387/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Why-are-Americans-Afraid-of-Dragons.docx 1974 essay] by Ursula K. LeGeuin in which she makes a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semiotics semiotic] analysis of dragon mythology. She argues that our belief in dragons (and those outside of America as well) stems from childhood, much like other ferocious fictional creatures such as goblins and hobbits, but many hold onto these fears as a way of avoiding reality. In her closing argument, she writes, "They know that its truth challenges, even threatens, all that is false, all that is phony, unnecessary, and trivial in the life they have let themselves be forced into living. They are afraid of dragons, because they are afraid of freedom."
|-
| Why is HTTPS crossed out in red? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a line through HTTPS? || The site accessed has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook? || Facebook has an invalid SSL certificate.
|-
| Why is HTTPS important? || For security reasons, as a site with HTTPS has encrypted traffic.
|}

===Section Eight===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there swarms of gnats? || The reason gnats (and other creatures) tend to swarm together is likely a safety-in-numbers protection, and as a big gathering to find a mate.
|-
| Why is there phlegm? ||{{w|Phlegm#Phlegm|Phlegm}} is a thick, viscous fluid produced by the mucus membranes as a way to clear the airway and aids in the release of bacteria, disease and debris in those passages.
|-
| Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN || From a Minnesota Paper, [http://www.startribune.com/local/138902104.html the Star Tribune], "Laws prevent the city from poisoning the crows". "Duffy [Steve Duffy, a co-owner of U.S. Bird Abatement Services, which has contracted with Rochester to get rid of the crows] isn't sure why Rochester has such a bad crow problem; probably a confluence of many bird-friendly conditions that has also made it a magnet for geese. He's seen worse cases, but called Rochester's situation 'hideous.'" And best of all, "The city has twice this winter hired experts to chase them off. They tried lasers and bullhorns — hey, get out of here, you crows — and even employed raptors to pick them off, one by one. That worked, for awhile." Unfortunately, they mean a {{w|bird of prey}}, not a {{w|velociraptor}}.
|-
| Why is Psychic weak to Bug || In Pokémon, Pokémon of the psychic type like Mr. Mime are weak to three types of attacks: Ghost, Dark, and Bug. The general theory is that Psychic Pokémon, relying heavily on their thoughts for attacks, are weak to fears, which ghosts, darkness, and bugs can be classified as.
|-
| Why do children get cancer? ||{{w|Cancer}} is an aggressive and often fatal disease that has the potential to affect all humans as well as other organisms. There are multiple types of cancer, each with their own epidemiology, but children are not immune to succumbing to the horrific effects of the disease. Children are human beings and are subject to the same illnesses adults have, regardless of age, or their innocence. There is no divine or supernatural explanation for this. Simply put, life is a battle for all humans regardless of how small they are.
|-
| Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus? || {{w|Poseidon}} was the patron deity of the city of {{w|Troy}}, which after a 10 years siege by the Greeks fell due to {{w|Odysseus}}' list of the {{w|Trojan_Horse|Trojan horse}}. As the Greeks were returning home after the Trojan War, Oddyseus' ship accidentally landed on the island home of the cyclops Polyphemus, who imprisoned the crew and ate many of them. In order to escape, Odysseus blinded the cyclops. Poseidon, Polyphemus' father, was extremely angered by his son being blinded, so he cursed Odysseus' ship to prevent him from reaching his home in {{W|Ithaca}}. The adventures which Odysseus encountered during his quest for reaching Ithaca are the main theme of {{w|Homer|Homer's}} {{w|Odyssey}} The Odyssey also says that before sailing, the crew forgot to offer a sacrifice as was ordained.
|-
| Why is there ice in space? || Space is {{w|Outer_space#Environment|Cold}}. The background radiation, which is used to measure the temperature of space's vacuum, is estimated at about 3K (−270 °C; −454 °F). Water freezes at 273.15 K (0ºC; 32ºF). Because the temperature in space is less than the freezing point of water, liquids freeze in space, turning into ice.
|}

===Section <strike>Owl</strike> Nine===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there an owl in my back yard? || Owls can be seen all over the world, and live in a wide variety of habitats. They are mainly noctural, and spend a large portion of the night hunting. The owl in your back yard is likely looking for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl outside my window? || As with the question above, the owl is likely to be hunting for food.
|-
| Why is there an owl on the dollar bill? || On the front of a dollar bill, near the upper right '1' is a tiny section of the design which can be seen to represent an owl. Conspiracy theorists will note that owls were symbolically linked to the Masons, while others will instead see a spider.
|-
| Why do owls attack people? || While owls and human often live in close proximity without problems, as with other species, owls may attack if they feel threatened. When people irritate or otherwise make owls feel unsafe, they retaliate with violence to protect themselves.
|-
| Why are AK47s so expensive? || The market value of an AK47 varies depending on where in the world you live. With strict gun control laws, obtaining an AK47 in the UK is likely to be more expensive due to the risks involved for those supplying the weapon. In ex-soviet countries and the middle east, AK47s are more plentiful, and hence the price is likely to be lower.
|-
| Why are there helicopters circling my house? ||This question is likely a joke because it is so incongruous to the others in this section. The joke is that people would be Googling about owls attacking people and assault rifle prices, which could, ostensibly alert authorities to come to your house to arrest you. If this is not the case, then the helicopter could be there for myriad reasons.
|}

===Section Ten===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are there gods? ||All gods and goddesses man made and are part of ancient and fictional mythology and folklore that are used to give spiritual guidance and explanations for phenomenons that were yet unexplained by natural processes. Lightning for example was thought to be produced by Zeus, King of all Greek Gods.
|-
|Why are there two Spocks? || This is probably a reference to the {{w|Star_Trek_(film)|2009 Star Trek movie}} in which the franchise was given a {{w|Reboot_(fiction)|continuity reboot}}. The modified setting is explained in-universe by time travel, with both the villain Nero and the original-timeline Spock being brought back from the 24th century to the 23rd, creating a timeline in which both older Spock (played by Leonard Nimoy) and the younger Spock (played by Zachary Quinto) coexist.

Another possibility is that the question refers to the episode {{w|Mirror,_Mirror_(Star_Trek:_The_Original_Series)|"Mirror, Mirror"}}, which mostly takes place in an alternate universe populated by ruthless versions of most of the characters (including Spock).
|-
| Why is Mt Vesuvius there? ||The simple answer is that volcanoes are created by interactions where the Earth's tectonic plates meet. These conditions only exist in a few places on Earth. The question could also be asking, "why is Mt Vesuvius near such a heavily populated area?" Humans have lived near Vesuvius throughout history, due to its pleasant climate, rich soil, and proximity to other major cities. The Italian government [http://www.theguardian.com/world/2003/jun/05/italy.sophiearie offers generous cash incentives] to move people away from the danger zone, but finds few takers.This question could also be a reference to mountaineer [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Mallory George Mallory]'s famous answer as to why he wanted to climb Mount Everest: "Because it's there."
|-
| Why do they say T minus? || Time before the launch of a spacecraft is denoted as T minus because the launch has not happened yet. Any time after the launched is stated without the minus, for example T 3 seconds, so time before the launch can be seen as "minus" time. The T stands for "Test" or "Time".
|-
| Why are there obelisks? || [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obelisk Obeiis article has more]
|-
| Why are wrestlers always wet? || Professional wrestling is strenuous activity, whether its fake or not. Strenuous activity results in sweat, giving the bodyan appearance of being wet. Greco-roman wrestling and Turkish Oil Wrestling both involve oiling the body, giving a similar appearance.
|-
| Why are oceans becoming more acidic? ||
|-
| Why is Arwen dying? || Because Peter Jackson wanted to give Aragorn manpain
|-
| Why aren't my quail laying eggs? || Have you tried turning them off and on again?
|-
| Why aren't my quail eggs hatching? || Problems in incubation, probably.
|-
|Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America? || ''Further information: {{w|United States military deployments}}''This is a very interesting question, albeit one likely based on a regional misunderstanding. Presumably, this question is asked by Americans who assume that the existence of {{w|Category:Military facilities of the United States by country|U.S. military bases abroad}} is a general trend among countries, as opposed to being the rarity that it is. In fact, {{w|List of countries with overseas military bases|only a handful of other countries}} have military bases outside of their borders, and the three—{{w|France}}, the {{w|United Kingdom}}, and {{w|Russia}}—that have more than one or two are all countries that, like the United States, {{w|Allies of World War II|were on the winning side of World War II}}, have {{w|List of countries by military expenditures|massive military expenditures}}, and have {{w|United Nations Security Council veto power|UN Security Council vetoes}}. In other words, only the most militarily elite countries have bases overseas. The U.S. is unique, however, in that it has far more overseas bases than any other country (and, pretty much, far more of anything else than any other country, when it comes to the military), and in that {{w|List of United States military bases|it has bases in several other highly-industrialized nations}}, including {{w|List of United States Army installations in South Korea|South Korea}} and the United Kingdom, and, most notably, the World War II {{w|Axis powers}}: {{w|List of United States Army installations in Germany|Germany}}, {{w|United States Forces Japan|Japan}}, and {{w|List of United States Army installations in Italy|Italy}}. France, Russia, and the U.K.'s bases, on the other hand, are almost all within areas that they previously controlled.These bases can be controversial in some countries, while in others they are a major source of economic and political stability. The U.S. traditionally justifies their presence as a necessary and crucial element in its efforts to promote peace domestically and worldwide. Despite their major role in {{w|U.S. foreign policy}}, and in the general political structure of the globe, the American public often largely ignores them, and they rarely become a major political issue (apart from an occasional mention by {{w|Libertarian Party (United States)|Libertarian presidential candidates}}).So, essentially, the absence of foreign military bases within the U.S. is primarily because there aren't really any other countries in a position to place bases there. Ironically, although no battles in the traditional sense have been fought within the U.S. since the {{w|U.S. Civil War}} and the U.S. mainland has seen {{w|Mainland invasion of the United States|almost no military action}}, foreign air force bases might have been useful on September 11, 2001. (The {{w|attack on Pearl Harbor}} in 1941 was 18 years before Hawaii became a U.S. state, but Hawaii was still a fundamental part of the United States as it was an incorporated territory.)There are, however, foreign troops stationed at some continental US military bases. For example RAF (British Royal Air Force) 39 Sqn and 361 Sqn at Creech Air Force Base in Nevada flying Reaper and Predator drones. But this are not foreign military bases, they are just guests.
|}

===Section Eleven===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why are my boobs itchy? ||It could be anything from dry skin to a rare life-threatening disease. Could also be related to pregnancy, PMS, or puberty. [http://www.just-health.net/Itchy-Breast.html Here's a thorough list] of possible causes and remedies.
|-
| Why are cigarettes legal? ||Despite the obvious detrimental affects nicotine has on health, like caffeine and alcohol, it is easy to regulate. Substances like marijuana and other drugs are mainly illegal because the government and regulatory agencies have no control over their production and distribution and therefore cannot profit from it. Nicotine however, which is the key ingredient in tobacco can be regulated and taxed and is.
|-
| Why are there ducks in my pool? ||Most likely, they're looking for a place to mate. Which means you'll soon have baby ducks in your pool. Most migratory birds are protected by wildlife laws, so you want to prevent them from moving into your pool in the first place. The [http://www.dfwwildlife.org/duck.html DFW Wildlife Coalition] has some tips.
|-
| Why is Jesus white? ||This is an ethnocentric viewpoint that varies throughout cultures. In African cultures he is portrayed as black. In short, whatever culture he is introduced to, those inhabitants will have him fit their own image.
|-
| Why is there liquid in my ear? ||[http://www.healthline.com/symptom/discharge-from-ear It's called otorrhea], and can be caused by infection, trauma, or changes in pressure. A common cause is [http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/swimmers-ear/basics/definition/con-20014723 Swimmer's ear], an infection of the outer ear canal.
|-
| Why do Q tips feel good? ||The inner ear contains [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erectile_tissue erectile tissue] (as does your inner nose which is why sneezing feels good) so you are massing tissue which gets aroused upon stimulation.
|-
| Why do good people die? ||Everybody dies, but loved ones and ones who were known to make memorable or valuable contributions are mourned and revered more than a person who has left much pain to others as their legacy; we remember the good ones and that's why it hurts more.
|-
| Why are ultrasounds important? ||Ultrasound scans provide a great deal of information about a fetus, thus increasing the chances of a healthy birth. They have many other medical uses.
|-
| Why are ultrasound machines expensive? ||As hospital equipment goes, ultrasound machines are actually a bargain. [http://www.costowl.com/healthcare/healthcare-ultrasound-machine-costs.html A new ultrasound machine] costs about $20,000-$75,000, depending on features. Comparable devices are much more expensive: The [http://info.blockimaging.com/bid/84432/CT-Scanner-Price-Guide CT scanner] runs $90,000-$250,000, while the [http://www.ehow.com/about_4731161_much-do-mri-machines-cost.html MRI machine] easily goes over a million.
|-
| Why is stealing wrong? ||Stealing is theft and it is illegal. Taking something that is not yours without permission or payment hurts the livelihood of other individuals as well as damages their trust in others.
|}

===Vertical Questions===
{| class ="wikitable"
|-
!style="width:20%;"|Question !! Possible answer
|-
| Why is there hell if god forgives? ||There is not a single answer to this question. The answer varies based on the religion and that religion's sect mixed with personal interpretations of that religions scripture and how a person decides to follow it. However the idea of what Hell will be like also varies. There is no one answer to this question, but the easiest explanation is that the individual did not pray hard enough, correctly, was not part of the right religion, and their forgiveness was contingent on something that the person either did not do or know to do (or say or think)
|-
| Why do iguanas die? ||All living things die, but iguanas may suffer from [http://www.anapsid.org/iguana/kidneyfailure.html kidney failure].
|-
| Why is GPS free? || GPS was originally developed by the U.S. military for its own use, not for commercial purposes. Once the satellites were launched and service began, anyone could receive the signals. Because it is a one-way transmission, there is no incremental cost to provide service to more users, and no practical way to prevent use without payment.
|-
| Why are trees tall? ||Tall is a relative term, and Redwoods are famous for their height - among the tallest in the world. The reason for this is, in part [http://www.nps.gov/redw/faqs.htm climate, fog, rain, good soil, few predators, among others].
|-
|Why are there female Mr. Mimes? || {{w|Mr. Mime}} is a Pokémon introduced in the first generation of the games, and despite its name, it can be either of a male or female gender. As the Pokémon was introduced before the concept of [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Gender gender in Pokémon games], it is likely that the people in charge of translating its Japanese name (Barrierd) did not take this into account during the process.
|-
| Why is there lava? ||Lava is simply magma (molten rock) which has been ejected from volcanoes. Once it is flowing on land, it is called lava. Magma is heated by the earth's core to create a liquid surface under earth's crust that the land floats on. Sometimes it has to come out through faults and fissures (and volcanoes).
|-
| Why is YKK on a zippers? || YKK Group is the name of a large group of Japanese manufacturing companies, which among other things manufacture a lot of zippers.
|-
| Why is life so boring? ||It is up to an individual to find meaning and interest in life. Monotony, predictability and lack of physical and intellectual stimulation would lead to a feeling of boredom.
|-
| Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts? ||Ghosts are a supernatural phenomenon that have not been empirically proven to exist. Those who believe in ghosts implicitly believe in a soul (of which a ghost is a materialization of), and it is a commonly held belief by religious institutions and ghost-hunters that animals do not have souls and thus dinosaurs would not have any either.
|-
|Why is there no king in England? || ''Note: For simplicity's sake, "England" here is being read as "United Kingdom." The various name changes, mergers, and splits of kingdoms are complicated.''The basis for this question is that for the past several hundred years, there has almost always been a queen in England, the sole exceptions being when the king has not had a wife. However, there is a distinction between being the queen of England (that is to say, {{w|List of British monarchs|a monarch}}) and being the {{w|queen consort|queen ''consort''}} of England: The former refers to a woman who {{w|Succession to the British throne|succeeded to the throne}} in her own right, becoming sovereign, while the latter refers to the wife of the king. Both roles, though, are commonly referred to as "Queen of England," creating the impression that there is always such a person. The logical question, therefore, is why {{w|Elizabeth II}}'s husband, {{w|Prince Philip|Philip}}, is not considered the king of England. The answer lies in Britain's system of {{w|male-preference cognatic primogeniture}}, which causes the monarch of England to usually be a man, not a woman. As a result of this, British laws were generally built around the presumption that the monarch would be a man, and that said man would be married to a woman, [[223: Valentine's Day|comic 223]] be damned. Since the creation of the modern British throne in 1707, only two women have reigned as queen in their own right; it just so happens that these two women have been two of the most famous and longest-reigning monarchs in world history, {{w|Queen Victoria}} and Queen Elizabeth II. This fact may add to people's enhanced perception of the lack of a British king. Victoria and Elizabeth's respective consorts, {{w|Albert, Prince Consort|Albert}} and Philip, have been styled as princes—Albert as {{w|Prince Consort}} and Philip as "{{w|British prince|Prince of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland}}." Both were explicitly granted their titles by their wives, though Albert was already a prince of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, and Philip had previously been a prince of Denmark and Greece, but had renounced both titles before marrying Elizabeth.The title {{w|king consort}} also exists, but has never been used in the United Kingdom.Notably, should {{w|Prince Charles}} succeed to his mother's throne, it has been announced that his wife, {{w|Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall|Camilla}}, will be styled as {{w|princess consort}}, ''not'' as queen consort, just as she has declined the title {{w|Princess of Wales}}, which is strongly associated with Charles's first wife, {{w|Princess Diana|Diana}}. Assuming that Charles succeeds, this means that Britain will not have anyone referred to as "queen," after decades of not having anyone referred to as "king."
|-
| Why do I feel dizzy? ||Balance is achieved from fluids in the inner-ear, but [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dizziness#Epidemiology dizziness] can have nearly a dozen causes.]
|-
| Why are dogs afraid of fireworks? ||Loud noises can trigger their flight or fight responses when they are [http://www.cesarsway.com/dogbehavior/hyperdog/How-to-Keep-Your-Dog-Safe-and-Calm-During-Fireworks nervous].
|-
| Why are there weeks? || Weeks were originally important for religious reasons, primarily the requirement to observe a sabbath (day of rest) every seventh day. Today it is used to evenly divide months into equal pieces, much like the months divide a year. Similarly, hours and minutes divide a day.
|}

<references/>

==Transcript==
:[This strip is a rectangular word cloud, titled 'Questions found in Google autocomplete'. Embedded in the cloud are 5 single panels, with illustrated questions. These are described at the end. Questions are given in roughly columnar order. None of the questions have question marks.]

:Questions found in Google Autocomplete

:Why do whales jump
:Why are witches green
:Why are there mirrors above beds
:Why do I say uh
:Why is sea salt better
:Why are there trees in the middle of fields
:Why is there not a Pokemon MMO
:Why is there laughing in TV shows
:Why are there doors on the freeway
:Why are there so many svchost.exe running
:Why aren't there any countries in antarctica
:Why are there scary sounds in Minecraft
:Why is there kicking in my stomach
:Why are there two slashes after HTTP
:Why are there celebrities
:Why do snakes exist
:Why do oysters have pearls
:Why are ducks called ducks
:Why do they call it the clap
:Why are Kyle and Cartman friends
:Why is there an arraow on Aang's head
:Why are text messages blue
:Why are there mustaches on clothes
:Why are there mustaches on cars
:Why are there mustaches everywhere
:Why are there so many birds in Ohio
:Why is there so much rain in Ohio
:Why is Ohio weather so weird
:Why are there male and female bikes
:Why are there bridesmaids
:Why do dying people reach up
:Why aren't there varicose arteries
:Why are old Klingons different
:Why is programming so hard
:Why is there a 0 ohm resistor
:Why do Americans hate soccer
:Why do rhymes sound good
:Why do trees die
:Why is there no sound on CNN
:Why aren't Pokemon real
:Why aren't bullets sharp
:Why do dreams seem so real
:Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts
:Why do iguanas die
:Why do testicles move
:Why are there psychics
:Why are hats so expensive
:Why is there caffeine in my shampoo
:Why do your boobs hurt
:Why aren't economists rich
:Why do Americans call it soccer
:Why are my ears ringing
:Why are there so many Avengers
:Why are the Avengers fighting the X men
:Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers
:Why are there ants in my laptop
:Why is Earth tilted
:Why is space black
:Why is outer space so cold
:Why are there pyramids on the moon
:Why is NASA shutting down
:Why is there Hell if God forgives
:Why are there tiny spiders in my house
:Why do spiders come inside
:Why are there huge spiders in my house
:Why are there lots of spiders in my house
:Why are there spiders in my room
:Why are there so many spiders in my room
:Why do spider bites itch
:Why is dying so scary
:Why is there no GPS in laptops
:Why do knees click
:Why aren't there E grades
:Why is isolation bad
:Why do boys like me
:Why don't boys like me
:Why is there always a Java update
:Why are there red dots on my thighs
:Why is lying good
:Why is GPS free
:Why are trees tall
:Why are there slaves in the Bible
:Why do twins have different fingerprints
:Why are Americans afraid of dragons
:Why is there lava
:Why are there swarms of gnats
:Why is there phlegm
:Why are there so many crows in Rochester, MN
:Why is psychic weak to bug
:Why do children get cancer
:Why is Poseidon angry with Odysseus
:Why is there ice in space
:Why are there female Mr Mimes
:Why is there an owl in my backyard
:Why is there an owl outside my window
:Why is there an owl on the dollar bill
:Why do owls attack people
:Why are AK47s so expensive
:Why are there helicopters circling my house
:Why are there gods
:Why are there two Spocks
:Why is Mt Vesuvius there
:Why do they say T minus
:Why are there obelisks
:Why are wrestlers always wet
:Why are oceans becoming more acidic
:Why is Arwen dying
:Why aren't my quail laying eggs
:Why aren't my quail eggs hatching
:Why aren't there any foreign military bases in America
:Why is life so boring
:Why are my boobs itchy
:Why are cigarettes legal
:Why are there ducks in my pool
:Why is Jesus white
:Why is there liquid in my ear
:Why do Q tips feel good
:Why do good people die
:Why are ultrasounds important
:Why are ultrasound machines expensive
:Why is stealing wrong
:Why is YKK on all zippers
:Why is HTTPS crossed out in red
:Why is there a line through HTTPS
:Why is there a red line through HTTPS on Facebook
:Why is HTTPS important
:Why are there weeks
:Why do I feel dizzy
:Why are dogs afraid of fireworks
:Why is there no king in England

:[We see Cueball from the torso up, with arms outstretched.]
:Cueball: Why aren't my arms growing

:[Megan stands with a grey ghost on either side of her.]
:Megan: Why are there ghosts

:[Beret Guy stands, looking at a squirrel.]
:Beret Guy: Why are there squirrels

:[Cueball stands.]
:Cueball: Why is sex so important.

:[We see Ponytail from the torso up.]
:Ponytail: Why aren't there guns in Harry Potter

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Pokémon]]
[[Category:Google Search]]

1482: NowPlaying

2015-02-04T14:58:24Z

173.245.56.202: /* Explanation */ added secondary meaning

<noinclude>:''The correct title of this page is '''1482: #NowPlaying'''. It appears incorrectly here because of {{w|mw:Manual:Page title|technical restrictions}}.''</noinclude>
{{comic
| number = 1482
| date = February 4, 2015
| title = #NowPlaying
| image = nowplaying.png
| titletext = If you click on the post, it takes you to search results for the note on various online music stores.
}}

==Explanation==

There are a variety of applications that post a user's music-listening habits on their preferred social network. In this comic, Randall takes that notion to its extreme, envisioning a program that does this note-by-note, rather than just song-by-song. As notes are much shorter than songs, this would lead to the flooding of friends' notification streams. In the example, the software is sharing the notes Brian is listening to; and his friends Mike and Caitlin are getting annoyed with the amount of posts they are receiving.

There are typically many hundreds of notes in any song, and any song with more than a single line of music contains multiple different notes at the same time (see articles on {{w|Harmony|harmony}} or {{w|Chord_(music)|chords}}). It's not clear how the service would describe such notes, or if it only reports notes from the primary {{w|melody}} line. Even if only the primary melody is reported by the service, all but the slowest songs will still require reporting dozens to hundreds of notes every minute (a single {{w|Glissando|glissando}} may cover a dozen or more notes in less than a second), meaning that anyone who can see your stream of posts will be [[Literally|literally]] inundated by posts from the service. Even if you could keep up with the speed of the posted notes that someone is listening to, the similarity in {{w|Phrase_(music)|phrases}} in many songs (especially pop songs eg:[http://youtu.be/JdxkVQy7QLM Pachelbel's Rant]) means that many different songs may include the same sequence of notes, though possibly in different {{w|Octave|octaves}} or at different speeds.

The comic's title alludes to the fact that you can "play a song" but can also "play a note." It may also allude to the visual similarities between the hash/pound/number sign (#) and the sharp sign (♯).

Of note: Some of the tweets are out of order. For instance, "Brian is now listening to A" is {{w|Timestamp|timestamped}} at 3:29, with Caitlin on the next line timestamped st 3:28, with the next note likewise at 3:28.

Also note: The first partially visible 'note' post, "E major", is actually not a note, but a {{w|Chord_(music)|chord}}, made up of at least three notes, E, G#, and B. (Further note: The "major" has since been removed from the comic and now reads simply "E")

Here are some synthesized versions of the notes in the order they appear in the comic. [https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/1079661/65467.ogg OGG] [https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/1079661/65467.mid MIDI] They appear to be the beginning of "I'll Be There For You" by {{w|The Rembrandts}}, the title music of the TV series "{{w|Friends}}". This suggests a possible hidden meaning: that Brian's friends are concerned he is watching this particular TV series...or it could simply be an instance of effective [[356: Nerd Sniping|nerd sniping]].

==Transcript==
:[A social network news feed with user images for each of the three different contributors. The top of the first post is partly obscured, and for the last post only half of the first line is visible. ]

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: E major
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: A
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: B
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: D
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: C sharp
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Mike''' What the hell
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: B
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: A
:Today ● 3:29 PM

:'''Caitlin''' Can someone call him?
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: A
:Today ● 3:28 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: E
:Today ● 3:29 PM

:'''Brian''' is now listening to: A

:[Caption below the frame:]
:My new social music service notifies your
:friends about what notes you're listening to.

{{comic discussion}}

1446: Landing

2014-11-14T02:02:06Z

173.245.56.202: /* Transcript */ -- tiny detail

{{comic
| number = 1446
| date = November 12, 2014
| title = Landing
| image = landingAnimated.gif
| titletext = [LIVE]
}}
Frames of the comic began appearing at midnight ({{w|Eastern Time Zone|EST}}) on November 12, 2014 and updated every five minutes. Together, the images form a {{w|flip book}} which is shown here above. You can find the individual images by clicking on the latest image of the comic on xkcd (go to that by clicking the date above or find it directly at [http://xkcd1446.org xkcd1446.org]).

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Buckle up, boys and girls.}}
This comic changes over time, tracking the progress of the {{w|Philae (spacecraft)|Philae}} lander separating from the {{w|European Space Agency}}'s {{w|Rosetta (spacecraft)|Rosetta}} probe to land on a comet. More info about it at [http://rosetta.esa.int rosetta.esa.int]. All frames can be seen at http://xkcd1446.org/.

The comic presents the imagined anthropomorphic "thoughts" of the Rosetta spacecraft and the Philae lander (and occasionally other parties) during the hours approaching separation from each other, approach to the comet, and (so far) initial analysis of data after the apparent successful landing on the comet. Beginning at [[Media:???65.png|11:05:00]], the comic includes a "Status Report" in the lower right corner which summarizes the status of various interested parties and accomplishments, beginning with "Rosetta", "Philae lander", "Mission Control", "Comet 67P", and "Have we landed on a comet?". As events occur in the comic, more status summaries are added to keep track of the changes to the situation and the supposed emotions behind them.

In many pictures a whale can be seen on the surface of the comet - often marked with a "?" as are almost all other parts of the unknown surface. There is also drawn a [[Cueball]] on the surface... Whales are also mentioned in the "Status Report" where they for instance may be listed as "calm" or "(probably) not in space". Dolphins and fish are later also mentioned there, commenting about the whales. The reference to whales comes from the fact that Philae brings along three harpoons, which on Earth have mainly been used to hunt whales; Randall previously brought up that comparison in [[1402: Harpoons]], suggesting that Philae was programmed to believe it was sent to kill the comet.

Shortly after release from Rosetta, Philae calls out 'Spaaaaaaaaaace'; this mimics the {{w|Portal 2}} 'Space core' who, on finally reaching space in the last scenes, gives the same elated cry.

The comic title was originally "???" and the title text "..." (probably to not give away too early what the comic was about), but changed to "Landing" and "[LIVE]" part of the way through (somewhere around 5:00 in the morning EST, maybe at the same time as the timestamp timezone switch). At 5:00 AM (EST) the timestamp in the image naming scheme switched from EST to {{w|Coordinated Universal Time|UTC}} as used in ESA's time keeping, resulting in a jump from [[Media:???53.png|04:55]] to [[Media:???54.png|10:00]] without actually any such delay between the two pictures. There were however a few pictures with more than 5 minutes of delay (about 12 times five minutes without an update in total). The update seems to have stopped after 142 pictures at 17:15 UTC, 12 hours and 15 minutes after the first picture.

According to [http://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-30026398 BBC News], the harpoons did not fire as planned and the lander may have landed, lifted off, and landed again. This would explain the change in "Do harpoons work on comets" from "YES" to "Don't know" at 16:35:00 and the change in "Have we landed on a comet?" from "YES" to "Yes, at least once" at 16:50:00. According to [http://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/13/science/space/european-space-agencys-spacecraft-lands-on-comets-surface.html?_r=0 The New York Times], radio contact with Philae fluctuated, which would explain the "Anxious", "Nervous", and "Confused" statuses around that time.

US Scientists presumably wake up at 7:40 EST (13:40 UTC) and say "Bluuurghhh. What time is it?" to indicate their tiredness.

There appears to be a brief error between 02:35 and 02:45, where the time until lander separation is shown as 1 hour, counting down to 50 minutes, before being corrected to 75 minutes at 02:50.

Since the event is over, and the images don't show the rebounds, we can guess that Randall made all or most of the drawings before the landing.

==Frame by Frame Breakdown==
{| class="wikitable plainlinks table-padding"
|-
!Image
!Day/Time
|-
|[[Media:???.png|00:00:00]]||1/00:00:00
|-
|[[Media:???2.png|00:05:00]]||1/00:05:00
|-
|[[Media:???3.png|00:10:00]]||1/00:10:00
|-
|[[Media:???4.png|00:15:00]]||1/00:15:00
|-
|[[Media:???5.png|00:20:00]]||1/00:20:00
|-
|[[Media:???6.png|00:25:00]]||1/00:25:00
|-
|[[Media:???7.png|00:30:00]]||1/00:30:00
|-
|[[Media:???8.png|00:35:00]]||1/00:35:00
|-
|[[Media:???9.png|00:40:00]]||1/00:40:00
|-
|[[Media:???10.png|00:45:00]]||1/00:45:00
|-
|[[Media:???11.png|00:50:00]]||1/00:50:00
|-
|[[Media:???12.png|00:55:00]]||1/00:55:00
|-
|[[Media:???13.png|01:00:00]]||1/01:00:00
|-
|[[Media:???14.png|01:05:00]]||1/01:05:00
|-
|[[Media:???15.png|01:10:00]]||1/01:10:00
|-
|[[Media:???16.png|01:15:00]]||1/01:15:00
|-
|[[Media:???17.png|01:20:00]]||1/01:20:00
|-
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==Transcript==
00:00:00
:[Showing blank image]
00:35:00
:Rosetta: Three hours to separation
00:45:00
:Philae: Has anyone ever tried this before?
00:50:00
:Rosetta: I don't think so.
01:25:00
:Rosetta: Ready to begin pre-delivery burn.
02:20:00
:Rosetta: We are ''go'' for separation!
02:25:00
:Rosetta: We are ''go'' for separation!
:Philae: ''Yessss!''
02:35:00
:Time until lander separation: 1 Hour
02:40:00
:Time until lander separation: 55 Minutes
02:45:00
:Time until lander separation: 50 Minutes
02:50:00
:Time until lander separation: 75 Minutes
02:55:00
:Time until lander separation: 70 Minutes
03:00:00
:Time until lander separation: 65 Minutes
03:05:00
:Time until lander separation: 60 Minutes
:Philae: Can I just go now?
03:10:00
:Time until lander separation: 60 Minutes
03:20:00
:Time until lander separation: 45 Minutes
:Philae: Turning on ''sesame'' Bzzzzzzzzzt.
03:25:00
:Time until lander separation: 40 Minutes
:Rosetta: Well it's been a fun 10 years together.
03:35:00
:Time until lander separation: 30 Minutes
:Rosetta: Well it's been a fun 10 years together.
:Philae: Yeah! ... a little boring maybe.
03:40:00
:Time until lander separation: 25 Minutes
:Rosetta: Well it's been a fun 10 years together.
:Philae: Yeah! ... a little boring maybe.
03:45:00
:Time until lander separation: 20 Minutes
:Rosetta: Ok, turning on ''concert''. I'll send you signals through the comet, once you're down there, so we can measure what's inside it.
03:50:00
:Time until lander separation: 15 Minutes
:Rosetta: Ok, turning on ''concert''. I'll send you signals through the comet, once you're down there, so we can measure what's inside it.
:Philae: Assuming comets even ''have'' insides!
:Rosetta: I'm, uh, pretty sure they do.
03:55:00
:Time until lander separation: 10 Minutes
:Rosetta: Ok, turning on ''concert''. I'll send you signals through the comet, once you're down there, so we can measure what's inside it.
:Philae: Assuming comets even ''have'' insides!
:Rosetta: I'm, uh, pretty sure they do.
04:05:00
:Time until lander separation: None
04:10:00
:[Philae separates from Rosetta to comet]
:Philae: ''Wheee!''
04:15:00
:Rosetta: Quick, take a picture of me!
:Philae: Just take a selfie
:Rosetta: Can't. No front-facing camera
04:20:00
:Time until landing: 6 Hours
10:00:00
:Rosetta: Bye
10:05:00
:[Rosetta, Philae and comet appear on the left, indicating the landing progress. Philae appear on the right.]
10:15:00
:Philae: Spaaaaaaaace
10:25:00
:[Showing Rosetta on the right]
:Rosetta: Lost track of earth thanks to that jolt.
10:30:00
:Rosetta: Lost track of earth thanks to that jolt. Let's see, where is it...
10:35:00
:Rosetta: Lost track of earth thanks to that jolt. Let's see, where is it... Aha!
10:40:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Rosetta: Hey! Earth!
10:45:00

:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Rosetta: Hey! Earth! Check out these pics!
10:55:00
:[Showing Philae on the right]
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Philae: Gonna harpoon a comet.
11:00:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Philae: Gonna harpoon a comet. This is so cool.
11:05:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:[Status report appear from bottom-right corner]
:Philae: Gonna harpoon a comet. This is so cool.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
11:10:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Philae: Gonna harpoon a comet. This is so cool. ... I hope harpoons ''work'' on comets.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
11:15:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Philae: Gonna harpoon a comet. This is so cool. ... I hope harpoons ''work'' on comets.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:20:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:25:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Philae: Hey Rosetta - you in touch with Earth?
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:30:00
:Time until landing: 5 Hours
:Philae: Hey Rosetta - you in touch with Earth?
:Rosetta: Yes!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:35:00
:Time until landing: '''4''' Hours
:Philae: Hey Rosetta - you in touch with Earth?
:Rosetta: Yes! ... They're a little worried about your top thruster.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Not in space
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:40:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Rosetta: ... They're a little worried about your top thruster.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:45:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Rosetta: ... They're a little worried about your top thruster. There's a chance you might have to hang on to the surface without it.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:50:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Rosetta: ... They're a little worried about your top thruster. There's a chance you might have to hang on to the surface without it.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: In space
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
11:55:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Rosetta: ... They're a little worried about your top thruster. There's a chance you might have to hang on to the surface without it.
:Philae: I ''really'' hope harpoons work on comets.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
12:05:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
12:10:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
12:15:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Philae: Harpoons work on whales, right?
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
12:20:00
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Philae: Harpoons work on whales, right?
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::'''Whales: Not in space'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
12:25:00
:['''Whale appears inside the comet''']
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: '''''Probably''''' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
12:30:00
:['''Whale marked "Probably not"''']
:Time until landing: 4 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
12:35:00
:[Whale '''and stick figure''' on comet marked "Probably not"]
:Time until landing: '''3''' Hours
:Rosetta: They should be getting the pictures back on earth about now.
:Philae: The 28-minute delay is weird.
:Rosetta: I'm watching for the ✔ seen 12:41 pm message.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::'''Has anybody tried this before: Nope'''
12:40:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Rosetta: They should be getting the pictures back on earth about now.
:Philae: The 28-minute delay is weird.
:Rosetta: I'm watching for the ✔ seen 12:41 pm message.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
12:45:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
12:50:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Philae lander: Not to obsess, but what do I do of I touch down on a big slab of rock? Pretty sure harpoons don't work on rock.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Worried'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
12:55:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Philae lander: Not to obsess, but what do I do of I touch down on a big slab of rock? Pretty sure harpoons don't work on rock.
:'''Rosetta: Don't worry - the rocks should be full of pockets where ice used to be. Your harpoons will crunch right through.'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Brave'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope

13:00:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Philae lander: Not to obsess, but what do I do of I touch down on a big slab of rock? Pretty sure harpoons don't work on rock.
:Rosetta: Don't worry - the rocks should be full of pockets where ice used to be. Your harpoons will crunch right through. '''We think, anyway.'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Worried'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:10:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Philae lander: [thinks] I mean, when I think about it, it's hard to believe harpoons even work on ''whales''.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:15:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Rosetta: Are you thinking about whales?
:Philae lander: No.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:20:00
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Rosetta: Are you thinking about whales?
:Philae lander: No.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Thinking about whales'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:25:00
:['''More whales appear above the comet surface''']
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Thinking about whales
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:30:00
:['''Whales and stick figure disappear''']
:['''Slab of rock appears near the target''']
:['''Whale hides behind rock''']
:Time until landing: 3 Hours
:Rosetta: ✔ seen 1:02 pm Hooray!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Thinking about '''rocks'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:35:00
:Time until landing: '''2''' Hours
:Rosetta: Oh, they wanted me to mention -
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Worried'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:40:00
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Rosetta: Oh, they wanted me to mention - When you touch down, try not to accidentally balance on one foot. If you do, your harpoons won't fire.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::'''U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:45:00
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Rosetta: Oh, they wanted me to mention - When you touch down, try not to accidentally balance on one foot. If you do, your harpoons won't fire.
:'''Philae lander: I've got a gyroscope. I'm pretty good at balancing.'''
:'''Rosetta: Yeah, well, try not to do that.'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:50:00
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Rosetta: Oh, they wanted me to mention - When you touch down, try not to accidentally balance on one foot. If you do, your harpoons won't fire.
:Philae lander: I've got a gyroscope. I'm pretty good at balancing.
:Rosetta: Yeah, well, try not to do that.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''WORRIED'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
13:55:00:
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:'''Philae lander: Can't a pilot on earth help me land?'''
:'''Rosetta: Sorry. They're so far away their signals take half an hour to get here.'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Worried'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: '''Hopefully'''
::'''Earth: Far away'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:00:00:
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Philae lander: Can't a pilot on earth help me land?
:Rosetta: Sorry. They're so far away their signals take half an hour to get here. '''You're gonna have to do it on your own.'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Worried
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:05:00:
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Rosetta: Sorry. They're so far away their signals take half an hour to get here. You're gonna have to do it on your own.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Brave'''
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:10:00:
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Philae lander: I can do this.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:15:00:
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Philae lander: I can do this.
:Rosetta: '''Well, and if you don't it's really the fault of the people back home who programmed you. None of whom were tough enough to come themselves.'''
:Philae lander: '''Haha, yeah!'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Worried
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:20:00:
['''Slab of rock disappears''']
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Philae lander: I can do this.
:Rosetta: Well, and if you don't it's really the fault of the people back home who programmed you. None of whom were tough enough to come themselves.
:Philae lander: Haha, yeah! '''Enjoy being stuck on your planet, suckers!'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: '''Stuck on earth'''
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:25:00:
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Philae lander: All right! Time to turn on my landing cameras...
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:30:00:
['''Lander fires thrusters''']
:Time until landing: 2 Hours
:Philae lander: All right! Time to turn on my landing cameras... '''...Annnnd arm my ''harpoons!'''''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:35:00:
:Time until landing: '''60 Minutes'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:40:00:
:Time until landing: 55 Minutes
:Rosetta: Can you see it? Can you see the landing site?
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:45:00:
:Time until landing: 50 Minutes
:Rosetta: Can you see it? Can you see the landing site?
:Philae lander: '''WOW.'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Brave
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
14:50:00:
:Time until landing: 45 Minutes
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''WOW.'''
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Big
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:00:00:
:Time until landing: 35 Minutes
:Philae lander: Hi, comet. I'm Philae. We caught you.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: WOW.
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: '''Near'''
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''Not yet...'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:10:00:
:[Showing Rosetta on the right]
:Time until landing: 25 Minutes
:Rosetta: Looking good. You're right on target. Spinning a little.
:Philae lander: WHEEEE!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''WHEEEE!'''
::Mission control: Stuck on earth
::Comet 67P: Near
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet...
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:15:00:
:Time until landing: 20 Minutes
:Rosetta: Looking good. You're right on target. Spinning a little. '''They're loving your pictures back home!'''
:Philae lander: WHEEEE!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: WHEEEE!
::Mission control: '''Nervous'''
::Comet 67P: Near
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet...
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:20:00:
:Time until landing: 15 Minutes
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''WOW.'''
::Mission control: Nervous
::Comet 67P: Near
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: "Bluuurghhh. What ''time'' is it?"
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet...
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:25:00:
:Time until landing: 10 Minutes
:Rosetta: Hey, Philae- Do you see anything that might explain how to levitate and destroy rocks with your minds? People back home keep asking.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Wow.
::Mission control: Nervous
::Comet 67P: Near
::Whales: ''Probably'' Not in space
::U.S. Scientists: '''Anxious'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: Not yet...
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:30:00:
:Time until landing: 5 Minutes
:Rosetta: Philae?
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''...'''
::Mission control: '''Anxious'''
::Comet 67P: Near
::Whales: '''Anxious'''
::U.S. Scientists: '''Nervous'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''...'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Far away
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:35:00:
:[Showing Earth on the right]
:Time until '''news of landing: 30 minutes'''
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ...
::Mission control: Anxious
::Comet 67P: '''Far away'''
::Whales: '''Calm'''
::U.S. Scientists: Nervous
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''???'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: '''Hopefully'''
::Earth: '''Near'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:40:00:
:Time until news of landing: 25 minutes
:Prime Minister: I hope we succeeded. That awful comet must be destroyed.
:Aide: ...Mr. Prime Minister, no one is trying to destroy the comet.
:Prime Minister: What?! But I secured you all this funding. I just assumed...
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ...
::Mission control: '''Nervous'''
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: '''Anxious'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: ???
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:45:00:
:Time until news of landing: 20 minutes
:This picture of Philae falling away is beautiful.
:Its kind of blurry and washed out.
:There will be a lot more soon. But this was the first.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ...
::Mission control: Nervous
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: Anxious
::Have we landed on a comet?: ???
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:50:00:
:Time until news of landing: 15 minutes
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''???'''
::Mission control: '''AAAAAAA'''
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: '''AAAAAAA'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''???'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
15:55:00:
:Time until news of landing: 10 minutes
:AAAA! I can't take it - this is too stressful!
:You're just looking at Twitter.
:I should probably never ''actually'' go to space.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''???'''
::Mission control: '''AAAAAAA'''
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: '''AAAAAAA'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''???'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:00:00:
:Time until news of landing: 5 minutes
:AAAAAAAAAAA
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''???'''
::Mission control: '''AAAAAAA'''
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: '''AAAAAAA'''
::U.S. Scientists: '''AAAAAAA'''
::Dolphins and Fish: Um, are those whales screaming?
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''???'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Hopefully
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:05:00:
:[Philae and the comet on the left veiled]
:Time until news of landing: [now]
:[Holding breath]
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander:'''???'''
::Mission control: '''[...]'''
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: '''Calm'''
::U.S. Scientists: '''[...]'''
::Dolphins and Fish: '''OK'''
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''???'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: '''[...]'''
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:10:00:
:Time until news of landing: [now]
:Philae lander: Hey, Earth!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander:
::Mission control: [...]
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: [...]
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: ???
::Do harpoons work on comets: [...]
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:15:00:
:Time until news of landing: [now]
:Philae lander: Hey, Earth!
:Philae lander: It's Philae.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander:
::Mission control: [...]
::Comet 67P: Far away
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: [...]
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: ???
::Do harpoons work on comets: [...]
::Earth: Near
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:20:00:
:[Showing Philae on a comet]
:Philae lander: Hi, Earth! It's Philae.
:Philae lander: I got you a comet.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Landed'''
::Mission control: [...]
::Comet 67P: '''Here.'''
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: [...]
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''YES.'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: '''YES.'''
::Earth: '''Far Away'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:25:00:
:Philae lander: Hi, Earth! It's Philae.
:Philae lander: I got you a comet.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Landed
::Mission control: '''Proud'''
::Comet 67P: Here.
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: '''Proud'''
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: YES.
::Do harpoons work on comets: YES.
::Earth: '''Proud'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:30:00:
:Philae lander: I'm taking pictures and sending them as fast as I can.
:Philae lander: It's a long way home but they should get there soon!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Landed
::Mission control: Proud
::Comet 67P: '''Harpooned'''
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: Proud
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: YES.
::Do harpoons work on comets: YES.
::Earth: Proud
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:35:00:
:Philae lander: I'm taking pictures and sending them as fast as I can.
:Philae lander: It's a long way home but they should get there soon!
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Landed
::Mission control: Proud
::Comet 67P: '''Landed on'''
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: Proud
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: YES.
::Do harpoons work on comets: '''Don't know'''
::Earth: Proud
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:40:00:
:[Philae slightly tilts]
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''???'''
::Mission control: '''Nervous'''
::Comet 67P: Landed on
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: '''Anxious'''
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: YES.
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: Proud
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:45:00:
:[Philae tilts more]
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ???
::Mission control: '''Anxious'''
::Comet 67P: '''???'''
::Whales: Calm
::U.S. Scientists: '''Nervous'''
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: YES.
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: '''Confused'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:50:00:
:[Philae tilts the opposite]
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ???
::Mission control: Anxious
::Comet 67P: ???
::Whales: Calm
::'''Scientists''': Nervous
::'''Harpoons: Tricky'''
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''Yes, at least once'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: Confused
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
16:55:00:
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ???
::Mission control: Anxious
::Comet 67P: ???
::Whales: Calm
::Scientists: Nervous
::Harpoons: Tricky
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: Yes, at least once
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: Confused
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
17:00:00:
:[Showing Earth]
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ???
::Mission control: Anxious
::Comet 67P: ???
::Whales: Calm
::Scientists: '''Anxious'''
::Harpoons: Tricky
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: Yes, at least once
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: '''Nervous'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
17:05:00:
:Philae? Are you OK?
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: ???
::Mission control: Anxious
::Comet 67P: ???
::Whales: Calm
::Scientists: Anxious
::Harpoons: Tricky
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: Yes, at least once
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: Nervous
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
17:10:00:
:[Showing Philae on a comet]
:Philae: I did it.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: '''Landed'''
::Mission control: '''!!!!!'''
::Comet 67P: '''Landed on'''
::Whales: Calm
::Scientists: '''[Wine]'''
::Harpoons: Tricky
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: '''YES'''
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: '''!!!!!'''
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope
17:15:00:
:Philae? Is everything OK?
:Philae: I landed! I'm on a comet. I'm OK and I'm on a comet.
:Status report:
::Rosetta: In space
::Philae lander: Landed
::Mission control: !!!!!
::Comet 67P: Landed on
::Whales: Calm
::Scientists: [Wine]
::Harpoons: Tricky
::Dolphins and Fish: OK
::Have we landed on a comet?: YES
::Do harpoons work on comets: Don't know
::Earth: !!!!!
::Has anybody tried this before: Nope

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]

1425: Tasks

2014-10-21T17:17:18Z

173.245.56.202: Undo revision 77588 by 173.245.56.206 (talk)

{{comic
| number = 1425
| date = September 24, 2014
| title = Tasks
| image = tasks.png
| titletext = In the 60s, Marvin Minsky assigned a couple of undergrads to spend the summer programming a computer to use a camera to identify objects in a scene. He figured they'd have the problem solved by the end of the summer. Half a century later, we're still working on it.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Cueball]] appears to be asking [[Ponytail]] to write an app that determines if a given picture is (1) taken in a national park, and (2) a picture of a bird. The first question is generally harder for a human to answer, but easy for an app that has access to location information and a {{w|geographic information system}} (GIS). The second one is easy for a human but much harder for a computer. This illustrates {{w|Moravec's paradox}} from the 1980s in a modern context. By the 1950s computers were useful for tasks like {{w|trajectory optimization}}, {{w|Logic Theorist|generating novel mathematical proofs}} and {{w|English_draughts#Computer_players|the game of checkers}}, so such high-level computation and reasoning tasks that were hard for humans turned out to be relatively easy for them. On the other hand it turns out to be hard to "give them the skills of a one-year-old when it comes to perception", as Moravec wrote.

In order to determine whether the user is in a national park, Ponytail plans to determine the user's location using the mobile device. This location will then be cross checked with a {{w|geographic information system}} (GIS) which will be able to determine whether the coordinates lie within a national park boundary.

Determining whether an image is of a given kind of natural object is far more difficult. This task falls into the area of {{w|computer vision}}. One of the goals in computer vision is to detect and classify objects within an image. This is a very challenging task for a number of reasons.

:Firstly, humans use size, edge-assignment, movement, and stereoscopic vision when looking at a scene (not a picture of a thing, but of the thing itself) to discern individual objects and then categorize them as foreground or background.<ref>{{w|Figure-ground_(perception)}}</ref> A photograph, however, is a static, monoscopic image that can only provide size and edge-assignment clues. Humans are only able to discern objects from background in photographs by comparing the photo against all of the things they've seen and everything they've learned about those things over the course of their life and identifying matching patterns.<ref>{{w|Visual_perception}}</ref> Presumably, today's computers do not have nearly the processing power or wealth of data available as the human mind.

:Secondly, the quality of the photograph will have an impact on a computer's ability to match patterns. For example, the object in the photograph might be partially visible or occluded. In the case of a living bird, additional complications arise from the variations among individual birds of the same species and differences in pose (flying, perching in a tree, etc.). Differentiating between visually similar objects can result in false positives. For example, is it a photo of a bird in flight or a plane (or superman!)? Ponytail's estimate of 5 years may be overly optimistic (see [[678: Researcher Translation]]).

Today's state-of-the-art algorithms for solving this kind of task mostly use local features (e.g. {{w|Scale-invariant feature transform|SIFT}} or {{w|SURF}} in combination with a {{w|support vector machine}} or {{w|convolutional neural network}}).

The subtitle refers to "CS", which is a common acronym for "{{w|Computer Science}}", of which {{w|artificial intelligence}} and {{w|computer vision}} are sub-disciplines.

The title text mentions [http://dspace.mit.edu/bitstream/handle/1721.1/6125/AIM-100.pdf The Summer Vision Project] and {{w|Marvin Minsky}} of MIT. In the summer of 1966, he asked his undergraduate student {{w|Gerald Jay Sussman}} to "spend the summer linking a camera to a computer and getting the computer to describe what it saw" ([http://szeliski.org/Book/]). {{w|Seymour Papert}} drafted the plan, and it seems that Sussman was joined by {{w|Bill Gosper}}, {{w|Richard Greenblatt (programmer)|Richard Greenblatt}}, {{w|Leslie Lamport}}, Adolfo Guzman, Michael Speciner, John White, Benjamin, and Henneman. The project schedule allocated one summer for the completion of this task. The required time was obviously significantly underestimated, since dozens of research groups around the world are still working on this topic today.

A month this comic came out, {{w|Flickr}} [http://code.flickr.net/2014/10/20/introducing-flickr-park-or-bird/ released] a [http://parkorbird.flickr.com/ prototype online tool] to do just what this comic describes, using its automated-tagging software to answer the bird question.

==Transcript==
:[Ponytail sitting at a computer with Cueball standing behind her]
:Cueball: When a user takes a photo, the app should check whether they're in a national park...
:Ponytail: Sure, easy GIS lookup. Gimme a few hours.
:Cueball: ...and check whether the photo is of a bird.
:Ponytail: I'll need a research team and five years.
:In CS, it can be hard to explain the difference between the easy and the virtually impossible.

==References==
<references/>

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]

1435: Presidential Alert

2014-10-17T12:08:18Z

173.245.56.202: /* Transcript */ Added transcript (probably formatted wrong, but better than nothing)

{{comic
| number = 1435
| date = October 17, 2014
| title = Presidential Alert
| image = presidential_alert.png
| titletext = When putting his kids to bed, after saying 'Goodnight', Obama has to stop himself from saying 'God bless you, and God bless the United States of America.'
}}
[[File:Eas_new.svg|thumb|upright=1.5| Current EAS logo. (from Wikimedia Commons)]]
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Second draft}}
The {{w|Emergency Alert System}} allows the U.S. President to address the country in the event of a national emergency, by broadcasting a message over all television and radio channels. Despite the system's having existed in various forms for over 60 years, no president has ever used it, even during the {{w|September 11 attacks}}.

In this comic, President [[Cueball]] accidentally activates the system by pressing a button, apparently located on the {{w|Resolute Desk|''Resolute'' Desk}} in the {{w|Oval Office}}. Surprised by being on television, he tries to think of something important to say on the spot, but cannot think of anything other than a piece of generic dental-hygiene advice—a rather non-urgent message.

The concept of the President mistakenly hitting an important button has long been a source for jokes, often somewhat morbidly involving the {{w|nuclear football}}.

The title text references the typical conclusion to presidential speeches: "Thank you, God bless you, and God bless the United States of America," or some variation thereof. As "goodnight" is the typical conclusion to a day, the title text jokes that {{w|Barack Obama|President Obama}} must sometimes confuse the two statements.

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}

[Panel 1]
Television beeping. Screen reads: "E.A.S Incoming Presidential Alert"

[Panel 2]
Obama is on the television.

My fellow Americans. I, uhhh. Wow.

[Panel 3]
Frankly, I didn't realize what this button did. I was just... I mean... I appear before you tonight to, um.

[Panel 4]
Look, Uhh...

Remember to floss regularly. Oral hygiene is important. Thank you.

[Title text]
When putting his kids to bed, after saying 'Goodnight', Obama has to stop himself from saying 'God bless you, and God bless the United States of America.'

{{comic discussion}}

Talk:1434: Where Do Birds Go

2014-10-15T12:05:42Z

173.245.56.202: Commented

Hehe, are we suggesting that "bird" may be a phase of dihydrogen monoxide? I like that.
--[[User:Stg|Stg]] ([[User talk:Stg|talk]]) 05:11, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

I recommend we keep the answer out of the explain page since it wasn't included in the comic. Birds can google it themselves. [[Special:Contributions/108.162.216.209|108.162.216.209]] 06:25, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

:Why are you so mean to poor birds? Do you know how hard is to type with beak? -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 11:08, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

I added the thing about catcher in the rye, but now I think that might not be right.[[User:Cheeselover724|Cheeselover724]] ([[User talk:Cheeselover724|talk]]) 06:28, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

:I haven't read Catcher in the Rye, but I purely read it as Superman & Clark Kent are the same thing, implying that birds and rain are the same thing. --[[User:Pudder|Pudder]] ([[User talk:Pudder|talk]]) 08:34, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

Cueball assumes it's a question common to all of internet-accessed humans, making it seem like a beautiful thing. In the end, it turns out those are actually helpless birds asking this question worldwide, not people. I'd advise you add a [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_the_Internet,_nobody_knows_you%27re_a_dog On the internet, nobody knows you're a dog] reference.
The ice/catcher in the rye connection is far fetched. Judging by the Clark/Superman comparison, Randall suggests that birds turn into the rain as part of the water/ice phases and not hide from it. Because Clark doesn't go when Superman arrives, he turns into Superman. [[User:Dulcis|Dulcis]] ([[User talk:Dulcis|talk]]) 08:01, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

:Actually, I think Clark will end up on bottom of the phone booth. Superman must assume that noone will steal his disguise while he will do the rescuing ... meanwhile, there is lot of water in birds, but also lot of other molecules, so the transformation wouldn't work. -- [[User:Hkmaly|Hkmaly]] ([[User talk:Hkmaly|talk]]) 11:08, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

[https://www.google.com/webhp?q=where%20do%20birds%20go%20when%20it%20rains the google query] [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.100|141.101.98.100]] 08:14, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

Birds can use the internet? Before we know it, they will start tweeting. [[User:Diszy|Diszy]] ([[User talk:Diszy|talk]]) 11:58, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

How do we know that is a pokedex? It looks more like a tablet to me. [[Special:Contributions/173.245.56.202|173.245.56.202]] 12:05, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

1416: Pixels

2014-09-06T19:39:28Z

173.245.56.202: /* Bugs */ : memory in Firefox

{{comic
| number = 1416
| date = September 3, 2014
| title = Pixels
| image = pixels.png
| titletext = It's turtles all the way down.
}}
'''NOTE: The above is only a zoomed out version of the this interactive comic.''' For a collection of images that appear when zooming in on this comic, see [[1416: Pixels/Images]].

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Individual panels need explanations}}
This interactive comic begins with a panel where [[Cueball]] is stacking turtles. This is a reference to the idiom "turtles all the way down," which refers to the problem of infinite recursion: if everything in the universe is "on top of" something else, so to speak, there must be a "bottom." A joking solution to the paradoxical nature of such a bottom is the proposition that {{w|Turtles_all_the_way_down|the world rests on a semi-infinite stack of turtles}}.

As can be read you should "scroll to zoom". This can be done by placing the cursor inside the panel of the comic. When scrolling up (using the mouse wheel) the picture zooms in until the pixels are visible. When you continue to scroll on each pixel then resolves into another comic picture, with black-on-white comic panels making up the white pixels and white-on-black panels making up the black pixels. Scrolling on until you can see the pixels of the comic picture you are now zooming into the process is repeated again and will be so for all subsequent sets of comic panels. Not all white and all black panels are the same; some sets involve more than two different panels, but all involve repetitive tiling.

==Themes==
*Below are all the themes relevant to cover all the images found when zooming in.
*They are sorted in the same order as in the gallery: [[1416: Pixels/Images]].
**Open the gallery in another window - zoom out and then you can see the pictures in this window as you read about them here below:

===Turtles===
Apart from the first image there are two more with a single turtle in them. In one of these the turtle thinks "I am a turtle". This is a reference to [[889: Turtles]] It may say so to the Cueball that is seen standing all alone in another picture.

===What if?===
There is a picture of the book, as it looks and big enough that all text is visible on the front cover. But there is also another version where the authors name is crossed out and replaced with Stephen King and also the word Spooky has been added above the title and below the word xkcd has been crossed and replaced with being afraid.

===Book Launch===
This comic was released on September 3rd, 2014, the day after [[Randall|Randall's]] book ''[http://whatif.xkcd.com/book/ What If]'' was launched. The book is shown and referred to in a number of frames, for example it is [[:File:pixels-upgoer.png|'''literally''' launched]] as a part of an <strike>rocket</strike> [[1133:_Up_Goer_Five|''up goer'']] built by Cueball. There are also a picture with Cueball holding "his book" and telling he is exited about book the launch.

The model ''up goer'' is [[:File:pixels-assembly-1.png|made of Rocket Parts from KSP]]. KSP is the {{w|Kerbal Space Program}}, a spaceflight simulator which was also [[1350: Lorenz#Themes|part]] of the latest interactive comic [[1350: Lorenz]]. Perhaps xkcd's 'parts' refers to KSP's large community of mod developers who contribute 'parts' to the game, although it was likely intended as nothing more than the humorous supposition that one could purchase physical rocket parts from a simulator. The frames showing the book launch use URLs that include the text "upgoer" in reference to the [[Up Goer Five]] comic.

In the end the upgoer leaves the Earth after one orbit and then flies through space.

===Needs More Struts===
{{w|Strut|Struts}} are structural members in engineering, and are are one of the components used in Kerbal Space Program to construct rockets. 'Needs More Struts' seems to be a meme amongst players of Kerbal Space Program, along the lines of 'When in doubt, overengineer'. Megan deems Cueball's rocket to be insufficiently structurally sound, and declares that it "[[:File:pixels-assembly-4.png|Needs More Struts]]"

===The Only Copy===
Cueball & Megan turn to each other having just launched the What-If book rocket into space (construction and launch are seen in other panels). perhaps Megan realises they may have misunderstood the term 'book launch' and that they may have just lost ''[[:File:pixels-upgoer-6.png|the only copy]]'' of the book.

===Space objects===
There are both the Moon, the Sun, Saturn and two images just with stars.

===Sky===
In four pictures Cueball and Megan is sitting below the stars. In the second the following conversation takes place:
:Cueball: Someone once told me the great kings of the past look down on us...
:Megan: From the stars?
:Cueball: Just in general.
The second panel is a reference to Disney's [http://lionking.wikia.com/wiki/The_Great_Kings_of_the_Past The Lion King]. Early in the film, Mufasa tells Simba that the great kings of the past look down on them from the stars. Later on, Simba recalls this to his companions, Timon and Pumba (who don't take him seriously). In the film, the kings of the past literally look down on--and watch over--the characters, which is how Megan interprets Cueball's initial statement. Cueball's reply that they just look down on us in general shows that he means the kings of the past figuratively look down on us (they view us as inferior or beneath them).

In the next image a shooting star is seen above them. The final picture looks to identical to the first?

===Mario===
A series of 8 images are called ''Mario''. One is also called ''entry'' has a picture only of a PC. The next four has Megan in front of the PC (Maybe she is Mario? Or she is playing Mario Brothers? She has a control in her hand so probably the last...) She sits on her knees in the first picture, then she sits on the floor. In the third picture she is lying down in front of the PC. Then there is one picture which is an inverse of the sitting picture. The last three pictures all have a view of the starlit night sky with the same two clouds in place. During the night (and these three pictures) a giant galaxy rises above the horizon. It does not look like the Milky Way would look anywhere from Earth (also it does not much look like a spiral galaxy like the Milky Way). There is something square protruding into the picture - this could be a brick wall hanging in the air. Mario can be seen standing in the bottom left corner. Or it could be part of the roof hanging out from the building Megan is inside. Maybe the rise of the galaxy shows how long Megan plays her game. Maybe this is why Cueball wishes to [[#Shut Down the Server|throw water on the server]].

===Shut Down the Server===
Cueball tells an offscreen character that he is going to [[:File:pixels-server-1.png|shut down the server]], while carrying a bucket of water.

Usually shutting down a {{w|Server (computing)|server}} is done via the operating system or software, or (not recommended) turning it off or pulling the power plug. But in this case it appears that cueball is simply going to douse it with water, likely resulting in serious water damage to the hardware.

===Clouds===
In five pictures Megan is floating in the clouds. Only two pictures with Megan, two only with clouds and one only with birds as seen from a distance.

===Cantor Set===
[[:File:pixels-cantor.png|One panel]] contains a number of lines and dots, which are in fact a depiction of the first 5 steps of a {{w|Cantor set|Cantor Ternary Set}}, mirrored about the horizontal centreline. The Cantor ternary set is constructed by repeatedly deleting the open middle thirds of a set of line segments. The Cantor Set is one of the canonical examples of a fractal, a shape whose individual parts resemble the whole. The use of the Cantor Set in this comic is self-referential, in that the comic, itself, is composed of parts of the same shape as the whole.

===Walking===
In two images Cueball and Megan is seen walking. One normal black on white close up, and one inverse seen from afar. These may be relevant to the two next ([[#Time Turners]] and [[#Stockholm Syndrome]]) where they are seen talking while walking.

===Time Turners===
The time turner is a device from the {{w|Harry Potter}} series of novels by {{w|JK Rowling}}. It allows the user to re-live a period of time over again. In the third novel Hermione is given the time-turner to allow her to take extra classes, however it is eventually used to spare Buckbeak the hippogryph from execution. This prompted many questions regarding why time-turners weren’t used on other occasions to save people's lives (among other things).

While J.K Rowling has “[http://pottermore.wikia.com/wiki/Time-Turner solved the problem to her own satisfaction]” she admits that she entered into the subject of time-travel too lightly.

[[:File:pixels-time-turner.png|This panel]] jokes that if the real life JK Rowling had a fictional time-turner which worked, she would have gone back and removed the time-turner plotline from the book, saving her all the hassle of dealing with the resulting time-travel questions. This act would result in a time-travel paradox.

===Stockholm Syndrome===
{{w|Stockholm syndrome}} is the name for a psychological phenomenon, in which hostages develop sympathy, empathy and/or positive feelings towards their captors. These feelings are usually seen as irrational, seeing as the hostage is held against their wishes, usually with the threat of physical harm or death.

[[:File:pixels-stockholm.png|This panel]] asks "How do we know anyone really ''wants'' to live in Stockholm?", questioning whether everyone who lives in the city of Stockholm is in fact held hostage there and only stays because they have developed to like life there (due to Stockholm Syndrome).

===Fire Hydrant===
[[Black Hat]] is talking to a fireman, with a fire engine on fire in the background, he asks "To be fair, what else would you expect to come out of a "[[:File:pixels-fire-hydrant.png|fire hydrant]]"?"

Black Hat appears to have managed to replace the usual water supply to the {{w|fire hydrant}} with actual fire. Thus when the hydrant is used, the result is, quite literally, fire (or oil with possibly flint and steel contraptions to cause fire). In Black Hat's logic, a hydrant which delivers water should be called a water hydrant.

===Eeee===
Megan hears a very long stretched ''EEEEEEEEEEEEE'' sound which goes over 6 images. It turns out it is a large letter '''E''' that shouts ''EEEEEEE!!!''. In total there are 64 small E emanating from the big one. There is also a picture with two big white E on black background. Those E are larger than the E that shouts.

===Evolution===
The {{w|March of Progress}} image is a famous and instantly recognisable image showing the stages of human evolution by way of a series of primate figures as if marching in a line. The panel parodies the March of Progress image, with [[:File:pixels-evolution.png|5 ducklings following an adult duck]]. In this case, rather than portraying selected individuals millions of years apart, the March shows evolution in action on a human timescale, the mother taking care of her ducklings. The comic has some resemblance to [[537: Ducklings]].

===Rope===
Four ropes cross diagonally across this black picture. Looks good when there are many of them in the same place.

===Chess===
There are two chess boards on black and white background with smaller chessboards drawn upon them

===Atom etc===
There is a picture of a Bohr Model atom--point electrons surrounding a nucleus of protons and neutrons. There is also a picture of what is probably a vibrating cosmic string fragment (a concept in [[string theory]]). Despite the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, getting down to the string does not mean that the cartoon viewer has reached the "bottom" of zooming in on pixels - zooming in on the loop will show a picture of string.

===Holism, Reductionism, Mu===
These three words refer to "A MU offering", an essay by {{w|Douglas Hofstatder}} in his book {{w|Godel, Escher, Bach}} (which was referenced by Randall in [[24: Godel, Escher, Kurt Halsey ]]). It includes a similar multiple level drawing: {{w|Mu (negative)|the word MU}} is composed of copies of the words [[:File:pixels-holism.png|HOLISM]] and [[:File:pixels-reductionism.png|REDUCTIONISM]], each of which are in turn made of smaller copies of the other, which are in turn made of [http://newtonexcelbach.wordpress.com/2011/02/16/two-more-letters/ tiny copies] of the word [[:File:pixels-mu.png|MU]].

===du===
"[[:File:pixels-du.png|du]]" is a {{w|Linux}} command to indicate the "disk usage" of a file or directory.

~$ du -s video/
4170882256

This is a command that shows how large all the files are in this user's "video" directory - presumably where they store their personal videos. The units of the result is probably kilobytes (depending on settings)

This number is clearly large and difficult to parse, and the units are not clear. More appropriate units would be gigabytes rather than bytes. The du command offers an option to display units in "human readable format", which will adapt to use kilobytes, megabytes, gigabytes, terabytes, etc. as appropriate. The next command purports to request the same result in more human-readable form.

~$ du -hs video/
A lot.
~$

It seems that the computer, rather than giving a specific answer, simply says that the size of the video directory is "A lot."

The final line indicates the computer is now ready to accept a new command.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is stacking turtles, and is about to put the fourth turtle on his pile. At the bottom right there is a small panel. Inside this is written:]
:Scroll to zoom

:[When zooming in there will be several panels with text. The transcript of these may not be possible to complete - but add the transcript of these panels here: [[1416: Pixels/Transcript|interactive transcript]]]

==Trivia==
===Gallery===
[[1416: Pixels/Images|This gallery]] contains the [http://azttm.wordpress.com/2014/09/03/xkcd-com-1416-pixels/ 79 images used in this comic]. The images are related in a [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/3/37/1416_Pixels_layout.png directed graph].

===Images Database===
This google sheet describes all possible images, their associated codes, and what possible images can be used as sub-images for each zoom level: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1nldKAkeVcK606CY12KI9bah9rDmK9E7CZOyinsEj2Lo/edit?usp=sharing

===Image scraping script===
This gist recursively downloads all possible images:
https://gist.github.com/Aaron1011/d3b56325881cd639506a

===Bugs===
*Doesn't seem to work properly in all browsers (e.g. Firefox and Safari on MacOSX), giving "TypeError: this.data is null" in line 173 of zoom.js: "var item = this.data.get(dims)"
*Doesn't seem to work in IE8, comic is blank, but title text works.
*Does not work on xkcd.org neither www.xkcd.org in Firefox and Chrome. Currently you should visit http://xkcd.com for this comic to work properly.
*Also, it doesn't work on HTTPS.
*Very slow and consumes a ridiculous amount of memory (<4GB) in Firefox.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Interactive comics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]