explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1506: xkcloud

2026-06-29T16:58:04Z

FaviFake: i disagree with all of these unexplained edits

{{comic
| number = 1506
| date = April 1, 2015
| title = xkcloud
| image = xkcloud.png
| titletext =
}}
{{series
| series = April
| number = 8
| date = April 1, 2015
| days_late =
| day_category = Wednesday
| prev_title = 1350: Lorenz
| prev_date = April 1, 2014
| next_title = 1663: Garden
| next_date = April 4, 2016
| extra_text =
}}
<div class="toclimit-3">{{TOC}}</div>To experience the interactivity of the game, visit the {{xkcd|1506|original comic}}.

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|
*Need to remove bullet points throughout the [[#Explanation]] and [[#Trivia]] sections.

* Also, clean up section [[#Don't contact us]] (don't use references or <s>striked text</s>, make a cohesive and clear explanation of what happened to the chatroom).

* Also need to move the explanation of the reasons OUTSIDE of [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript|the full transcript]] and inside the, you know, [[#Explanation]]...}}
In this interactive {{w|April Fools' Day}} comic [[Cueball]], presumably representing [[Randall]], admits to the readers he built a flimsy {{w|Cloud computing|cloud}} services company using spare computers and parts. Included in the cloud hardware are (from left to right) a {{w|Macintosh}}, several old laptops, an {{w|Alienware}} tower, a {{w|Nintendo}} {{w|Virtual Boy}}, an old desktop with the cover off, and an {{w|Atari, Inc.|Atari}} {{w|Pong#Home_version|Pong Console}}. He named the company after xkcd, xkcloud being a [[:category:Portmanteau|portmanteau]] of "[[xkcd]]" and "{{w|Cloud computing|cloud}}", here pronounced XK-cloud. The portmanteau incidentally still contains all four xkcd letters in the correct order: xkcLOUd. This was later reused for the xkcd keyboard in [[2150: XKeyboarCD]], where the word Keyboard, has an X before the word and a C before the D with the xkcd letters capitalized.

After providing his services to various (very big) companies ({{w|Facebook}}, {{w|Twitter}} and {{w|Tumblr}}), that are very concerned with securing the users data, his setup failed (some portions may even have caught fire? He is not sure). This has caused him to lose the data he was required to preserve as part of his service. He thus requests the readers help to make up and re-imagine the lost data by pressing the large red button at the bottom of the comic. Preferably ''before Facebook & Co notice we lost it.''

If you take him up on his request and push the button, you will be taken to a "survey" where you will get the chance to help by either trying to combine a posted picture with its lost text or, vice versa, by trying to combine a posted text with its lost picture. In either case you get a selection of texts/pictures to choose from but can also choose to write your own text or even draw the picture. After doing this you get to see this combination in the news feed together with several other posts (which other people have helped combine from other lost data). And then you can continue helping as long as you like.

The content of the "surveys" appear to come from reader submissions, and are different upon every click. This is thus both an interactive and a dynamic comic with only the first picture shown on top of this page. By inviting the xkcd readers to add content that will be displayed in the comic later, the result of all the interactions leads to the generation of {{w|Crowdsourcing|crowd-sourced content}}.

It was not immediately clear if the reader-created drawings or captions are, in fact, being cycled into the surveys and feeds, or if the displayed items were all created by Randall and the reader-created content is simply discarded. With the huge amount of different comments and drawings that already appeared on the first day, and since especially the drawings look like they are created in the simple Paint app (i.e. not by Randall), there can be no doubt that most of the content is created by the users. However he must have made some pictures to get it all started, and at least one of these can be seen [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures posted by users#Randall's pictures|here]].

This comic resembles last years April Fools' Day comic [[1350: Lorenz]] where user input also generated a very complex crowd-sourced comic. In both comics it was possible to create a [[#Permalink|permalink]] to save a given version of the comic to share with others. An earlier comic was also related to problems with cloud computing: [[908: The Cloud]].

Due to the very complex nature of this comic, there are lots of details that may need an explanation. This can be found in the sections below. Note that there have been some [[#Changes and bugs|changes and bugs]] regarding this comic after it was first released. Some of the pictures that are referenced below were saved before these changes took place. So consult [[#Changes in the comic|these changes]] if the pictures do not match the expectations.

===Extra xkcloud pages===
Since this comic is so big and complicated, extra pages have been created to include much more information than is wished for on this main page (which is already of considerable size). These pages are listed here for convenience, but they are also listed in the relevant sections below:
*[[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages]] - Pictures representing the other three main types of pages.
*[[1506: xkcloud/Pictures posted by users]] - Some of the pictures of the comic created by users.
*[[1506: xkcloud/Transcript]] - A transcript of these pages with explanations for the reason for data loss and other features, such as usernames, like buttons, etc.

===Functionality===
*Pressing the red button at the '''front page''' (shown here above) links to one of two interactive survey pages (see [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages|the pictures]] of all types of pages.).
**All these pages have a news feed below the top post. This will be described [[#News feed|here below]].
*The '''Lost picture page''' (see several [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Help.21 We lost the picture page|pictures here]]) asks the reader to indicate which of eight '''line-drawings''' (see several [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures posted by users|examples here]]) best matches a given caption, or the reader can create their own drawing.
**This can be done on the '''Draw one your self sub-page''' (see several [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Draw one your self page|pictures here]]) in a simple web-based "{{w|Paint (software)|paint}}"-style {{w|Web application|app}}.
***Note that someone found a way to copy a picture into the comic. See at least one example of this [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures posted by users#Copy pasted pictures|here]].
*The '''Lost text page''' (see several [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Help! We lost the text page|pictures here]]) asks the reader to indicate which of eight captions best matches the given drawing, or the reader can create their own caption and submit this instead.
**These captions are user generated. See transcribed examples of these '''post from users''' [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript#Post from users|here]].
*In either case, at the top of the pages, we are given the '''Reason for the data loss'''. And there are many different reasons (all by account of Randall).
**A list of transcribed reasons (with explanations included) [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript#Reason for data loss|can be found here]].
*After completing the "survey" you go to a new page appears:
*The '''Help us recover more data''' page (see several [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Help us recover more data page|pictures here]]) has yet another red button like the front page, but on this page it is at the top of the page, saying exactly ''Help us recover more data''.
**By pushing this button you go to one of the two "Lost" pages mentioned above.
*It is possible to go back to the front page at any time by clicking the picture of Cueball sitting behind his desk in the same way as he does in the first picture on the front page.
**Cueball is always present to the left on all pages after the front page.
**But if you go back to the front page like this, then if you again click on the "original" red button to return to help with the recovery, you will always go back to the same page you came from (with the same posts in the news feed and if it is one of the lost data pages also with the same post to fix.)
**You can thus only get to a new survey page by finishing the current task (or pressing a permalink as [[#Permalink|discussed below]]).

===News feed===
*Below the "survey" or the post you just recovered (to begin with), you will be presented with a listing similar to a {{w|Facebook features#News Feed|Facebook news feed}}, listing six posts of the line-drawings apparently tagged with the captions as paired up by other users survey results.
**The posts are made by apparently '''fictional randomly-named readers''' (see transcribed examples [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript#User names|of names here]]).
**But there are only 20 '''user pictures'''. See these (and why it is known that there are only 20) as well as a description of these pictures [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript#User pictures|here]].
**The posts are accompanied by a button similar to Facebook's "'''{{w|Like button}}'''" but here the button is labeled with different words which are all {{w|synonyms}} for ''[http://www.thesaurus.com/browse/want want]'' (see transcribed [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript#Like buttons|list of words here]]). So not "to like" but "to want" is the new thing in this version of Facebook.
*After the first time you recovered a post, there will thus be seven posts on the ''Help us recover more data'' page, six new posts below the one you just helped complete.
**The only difference when you click this pages red button (rather than when you start for the first time at the front page) is that there will now be seven posts below the one you need to fix.
**These seven posts are the same as those you had on the previous page, including your own at the top.

===Permalink===
*Next to each post there is a text ''Link'' above the "Want" button above the picture. (This goes for all three types of pages mentioned above.)
*The "Link" is an actual link of the type that is called a "'''{{w|permalink}}'''", a portmanteau of "permanent-link".
*If you wish to "save" any given post for future reference (for instance one with your own drawing) you can do so by copying down this link.
**Last year's April Fools' Day comic, [[1350: Lorenz]], was the first time the [[1350: Lorenz#Permalink|concept of a permalink]] was used on xkcd.
**The permalink option did not appear in the comic until very late in the afternoon on April 1. The "Link" was thus not present on the pictures refereed above. (See [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#After 18:00 ET on April 1st|these pictures]] instead).
*Pressing the "Link" next to any given post takes you to the page of the permalink:
**This page will show a version of the ''Help us recover more data'' page with the chosen post as the top post.
**When you click the permalink it takes you to this "new" page and this page will '''not''' show all the posts from the page where you chose it.
**Only the post you saved via the "Link" next to it.
***All the other post will again just be chosen at random, and these will change again every time you reload this page via the saved permalink.
***Even the text on the "want" buttons also continues to change.
***The user name and user picture stay the same though.
*As an '''example''' of a [http://xkcd.com/1506/#post/50b47c70-3a7c-504d-bcc0-60597338e999 permalink] this is a post saying: ''We told Iran that atomic energy is unsafe'' for a picture of a black devil and two Cueballs next to a road.
**Originally the user name was {{w|Mark Zuckerberg}} but this has since changed to ''Destiny1983'' next to a user picture of a stick figure with black hair on a skateboard.
**See [[#Changes in the comic|Changes in the comic]] below for a possible reason.
**Also please make a note here, if the user name and picture is no longer the same.
*A huge '''collection of permalinks''' with link to the pictures have been amassed here:
**[[1506: xkcloud/Table of Permalinks|Table with permalinks]] contains all known images and captions at least once. (2179 feed entries, featuring 1481 different pictures and 1935 different captions, as of 2015-04-24)
**[[1506: xkcloud/List of Permalinks|List of Permalinks]] contains all known permalinks (25585 links, as of 2015-04-24)

====Details on the permalink====
*Since the post from the page where you choose the first permalink is reloaded... Can you then only save one post at a time?
*The answer is "no" - you can save all posts on any given page.
**For each "Link" text on a given page, there has already been generated a unique permalink {{w|URL}}.
**Thus you can copy any permalink via the "Link", without actually pressing the "Link" to obtain the permalink for a given post.
**Furthermore, since this may be the only comic where you can copy the text, you can simple mark the entire page and copy paste it into a document that contains formatting. If you do this then you will have all the text, pictures and most importantly the permalinks for all the posts.
*If you click the Link and go to the permalink page there will be seven posts, six new and the one you just saved.
**The behavior of the posts is very strange from here if you press more permalinks on this first permalink page
**Also it will not be the same again after this first time as compared to if you continue to help recover more data and use the permalink later.
**On this first permalink page, where your chosen post is at the top, if you click on another post's permalink the following will happen:
***The post you originally choose disappears from the page, as the new chosen post is moved to the top.
***The other five post remains in the same order, so there are not only 6 posts.
***If you continue to choose the other posts one at a time, they will simply exchange place with the one at the top, with all six posts remaining.
***Once you have been through all of them, then the order of the post has been determined.
****So if you click on a "Link" that you have already once activated, then this page will just reload, and the post will have the same order as last time.
****This is only until you choose to reload, or when you load such a permalink later. Then again it will just be the chosen post, and then always six other new posts.
**If you then at some point move on via the red button you kind of stay in the permalink page, now just with new options to choose from.
***If you then create a new post, six new posts will be loaded below.
***When you click on a permalink at this point, there will not be any reloading of the post (because it is not the first time).
***Any post you click will move to the top, but all the other (six this time) will stay, the top post just moving down to another position.
****It is not always a direct exchange. Sometimes the top post moves to another position and then pushes the others down until they reach the now calculated position of the post now at the top.

===Our policy regarding your personal data===
:On every of the pages after the front page Cueball sits at his desk labeled XKCD.COM
:Below him are xkcloud's policy:
:''Our policy regarding your personal data'':
*Please stop sending us your personal data
*We are running out of places to put it
*Is this even yours?
*Does anyone recognize whose data this is?
*Oh jeez never mind here comes more data
*Why are you doing this
*Please stop
*Help
:As can be seen he is getting desperate because people keep sending them more data.
::He has no place to store it.
::And he do not even know who the data belongs to.
::So now he hopes someone else recognize the data (what you are doing if you choose to help).
::In the end he simply pleads for people to stop and then shouts ''Help''.
:If you click on the desk you are sent back to the front page of the comic.
:But below Help is their real contact detail [[#Don't contact us|Don't contact us]]:

===Don't contact us===
*At the same time the permalink appeared, there was also suddenly a new link on all other pages than the front page, written in a very light grey font. It can be hard to see on some screens and has possibly changed colour to become harder to see since it first appeared.
**It is located right beneath ''help'' at the bottom of the list of problems written under ''our policy regarding your data'' right beneath Cueball at his desk to the left (see [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#After 18:00 ET on April 1st|picture here]]).
**In some cases, tilting the screen will help to make it visible- if you still can't see it, you can still find it with the cursor, or you can also highlight the text below Cueball down to make it easier to see.
*The link text reads '''Don't contact us''' and links to [https://euphoria.io/room/xkcd a now-defunct chatroom formerly hosted at euphoria.io].
*Click the [https://euphoria.io/room/xkcd/ link] to open an xkcd chatroom on Euphoria. (See a [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#xkcd chat forum|picture here]]).
**Several xkcd users began posting on the original chatroom at around 18:00 {{w|Eastern Time Zone|Eastern time}} (Randall's timezone).
**After picking a username, you can chat in real time with the other users. You can change your username by clicking on it near the bottom of the screen and entering a new one.
**On November 23rd 2023, euphoria shut down. The xkcd room lives on in the form of a new instance on [https://euphoria.leet.nu/room/xkcd/ euphleet].
''We are open for anyone to chat here. Hey you! Come right over and say hello to us! ~<s>[https://euphoria.io/room/xkcd euphoria.io/room/xkcd]</s> https://euphoria.leet.nu/room/xkcd/ ''
(PS. Please say thank you to @Xyzzy on it; He did make the new chat, after all. (From @KurzgesagtDuck11. (Now @Geometrist.))
====Undocumented Feature====
*This chat room is reminiscent of the one in a comic [[1305: Undocumented Feature]].
*As mentioned above, this chat room is hard to access - to access it, click on the hidden link saying "Don't contact us" under "Our Policy Regarding Your Personal Data"{{xkcd|1506}}.
**You do get to choose your username, unlike [[1305: Undocumented Feature]], but you could change it. Or others could use the same.
*When it came out, many users began using the chatroom.
*Maybe Randall timed these extra features for when people came back from work all over the US.

==Changes and bugs==
During the first day there occurred several changes to the comic, and also some bugs very present.

===Changes in the comic===
*All the changes mentioned here occurred during April 1 on the release day:
*Since being [[Media:Originalxkcloud.png|originally posted]] the words "Click here" were relatively quickly added in large text to the top of the red button followed by the word "to" being added to the beginning of the existing text.
**The text changed from
***''Help us recover user data before Facebook & Co notice we lost it.'' to
***''Click here to help us recover user data before Facebook & Co notice we lost it.''
**The reason for this is most likely that too few users understood that they could enter a second part of the comic by clicking on the red button.
*Late in the afternoon on April 1 (around 18:00 {{w|Eastern Time Zone|ET}}) several changes occurred to the pages that can be reached from the front page:
**The [[#Permalink|permalink]] option appeared
**The link that says [[#Don't contact us|Don't contact us]] appeared under the text beneath Cueball's desk with a link to an xkcd chat room.
***Though only for the text font to fade out to being almost invisible again later on April 1.
**The alignment of the text right beneath Cueball's desk changed. (Compare this [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Help us recover more data page|before picture]] with this [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#After 18:00 ET on April 1st|picture after]] 18:00 ET).
**The number of posts increased from 3 or 4 to 6 or 7. (See the pictures above — scroll down to see the relevant after picture).
**Also the number of pictures and text to choose from increased from five to eight (as can also be seen by comparing the pictures found here for before — for [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Help! We lost the text page|text]] and for [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#Help! We lost the picture page|picture]] — with the [[1506: xkcloud/Pictures of other pages#After 18:00 ET on April 1st|pictures after]] (scroll down as mentioned before)).
***The reason he increased the number of posts (both to see and to choose from) could simply be because there where now is so many possible posts that the risk of seeing the same is smaller even with 6 posts.
*Sometime on April 2, Randall made an update to the names list.
**That this happened could be seen since the names shown in permalinks did change. And since then they have stayed constant.
**For instance, [http://xkcd.com/1506/#post/3c34fb48-1a07-51d2-a81d-5257a3681024 this permalink], to an atomic bomb explosion with the caption ''that's one nasty burn!'', had the name "Lauren Ibsen Dolores Amit" (a play on "{{w|Lorem ipsum|Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet}}"), but then displayed the name "Virginia2006" next to a picture of a man with black hair. Currently, it displays the name "Michelleii" next to the same image.
***(If this changes please make a note - then the names list have either been changed again, or the assumption that the names stay constant is wrong.)

===Bugs===
From time to time, instead of the interactive page there is a page with [[Media:three dots only.png|three dots only]]. Also, at around 18:00, when all the changes occurred, the xkcd page did not work properly. The chat room was also overloaded at this time.

==Transcript==
:'''[This transcript only transcribes what can be seen in the first picture shown at the top of the explanation here. The standard text for the next possible pages can be seen on the [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript|full transcript]].]'''

:[One large frame with a five part comic and a large red button at the bottom.]
:[Cueball sitting behind a desk.]
:Cueball: We've made a huge mistake.
:Desk: XKCD.COM

:[Cueball stands and indicates a motley collection of computers and related equipment strewn around the desk.]
:Cueball: I figured starting a cloud services company would be easy.
:Cueball: After all, I've got ''tons'' of computers!

:[A zoomed view on Cueballs head.]
:Cueball: Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr— they all struggle to protect privacy and user data...
:Cueball: And '''''we''''' offered a solution.
:Cueball: <small>I forget what it was, though.</small>

:[Cueball is standing with his arms up.]
:Cueball: Anyway, long story short, we screwed up ''immediately'' and lost ''tons'' of their data.
:Cueball: <small>Also a bunch of stuff is literally on fire?</small>

:[Cueball standing behind a desk.]
:Cueball: We can fix this.
:Cueball: But we need your help.
:Desk: XKCD.COM

:[Below the above is a large red rectangular clickable button, that will take the reader on to the interactive part of the comic. On the button it says in large white letters:]
:'''CLICK HERE'''
:To help us recover user data before Facebook & Co notice we lost it.

:'''[The standard text for the next possible pages can be seen on the [[1506: xkcloud/Transcript|full transcript]]. Also here will be a list with possible text for the lost data.]'''

==Trivia==
*It's the first comic:
**Without a title text. (If you don't count the unnumbered [[A Smarter Planet]] comics and [[404: Not Found]].)
**Where you can copy and paste most of the text from the comic. I.e it is not drawn but printed.
***This goes only for the follow up pages after the front page.
***It does not only go for the user input.
**These two facts could go together since the way this comic had to be created (i.e. it is not a single picture), there may not have been any possibilities for making a title text
*Source code of elements in the drawing interactive contain the attribute "data-reactid", indicating it is written using the [http://facebook.github.io/react/ React JavaScript library,] developed to use with Facebook & Instagram.
*One of the pieces of text you can get explains the very reason you need to put in the image for it.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Interactive comics]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Knit Cap]] 
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Portmanteau]]
[[Category:No title text]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Elon Musk]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Characters with hats]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Joe Biden]]
[[Category:Giraffes]]

980: Money

2026-06-29T16:53:51Z

FaviFake: /* Explanation */

{{comic
| number = 980
| date = November 21, 2011
| title = Money
| image = money.png
| titletext = There, I showed you it.
}}
{{TOC}}Clicking on the image on [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] takes you to an [https://xkcd.com/980/huge/ interactive] and much larger image. On the interactive image there are two links: one takes you to the [https://xkcd.com/980/sources/ sources and downloads] page where a list of sources and the [https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png full image] can be downloaded.

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|The US foreign aid section has a typo---it lists economic/humanitarian aid as equaling military aid when in fact (as of publication) it was much greater. Plus, the boxes have sizes not reflecting the numbers shown, further suggesting that this is a typo [[Special:Contributions/35.151.32.161|35.151.32.161]] 03:57, 6 December 2025 (UTC)

This should be added somewhere in a Trivia section}}
{{Quote| I had a huge amount of fun putting the money chart together. It was the first time in a long time that my life’s been stable enough that I’ve been able to really disappear into a project—I’d almost forgotten how enjoyable it can be.|[[Randall Munroe]]|[https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/11/24/money-chart/ Source]}}

This is a [[:Category:Charts|chart]] comic - a type of comic that [[Randall]] does from time to time. He has for instance done [[256: Online Communities|maps of the Internet]] ([[802: Online Communities 2|twice]]!) and other huge visualizations like this chart [[Radiation]] with a similar structure as this chart but with Radiation as the subject. The Radiation chart is most likely the inspiration for this much more comprehensive Money chart.

In this money chart there are five boxes with items on different scales of monetary value denoting prices and values of many things, big and small (with the values contemporary to the comic's release in 2011; most are now more expensive due to inflation). Each scale of dollar increments are different colors. One dollar increments are green - naturally, because American paper money is green. Thousands are orange/red. Millions are gray. Billions are yellow. Trillions are blue. This comic uses {{w|Long and short scales|the short scale}} for naming large numbers (so a billion = 1000 millions = 10<sup>9</sup> rather than a million millions = 10<sup>12</sup> as in continental Europe).

Included in one frame is a small man with a red and white striped shirt, blue pants, a cane and a knit cap. He is known as Wally or Waldo (in the US) from the {{w|Where's Wally?|''Where's Waldo?'' books}}. To not give anything away for those who wish to search for him themselves there will be no spoiler here. But if someone needs a little help... Then by clicking this [[980: Money/Transcript#Billions|link]] you will be directed to the relevant section amongst the five sections where Waldo can be found. (The link will take you to that section of the full transcript page). If you still cannot find him (or give up in advance) then just search the transcript page for Wally or Waldo. There is a [[Header text#Money|unique header text]] for this comic.

The title text is a reference to the phrase "Show me the money!" which originates from the film ''{{w|Jerry Maguire}}''.

===Extra Money pages===
Since this comic is so big and complicated, extra pages have been created to include much more information than is wished for on this main page. These pages are listed here for convenience, but they are also listed in the relevant sections below:
* '''[[980: Money/Transcript]]''' - The full transcript of the entire comic can be found here. It is linked from the [[#Transcript|Transcript]] section.
* '''[[980: Money/Prices in tables]]''' The complete list of every item in the comic.

===Tables with explanations===
====Dollars====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-left
|The price of various common bills and commodities. The One Dollar Menu is a type of menu at various fast food restaurants. The one dollar bill and ten dollar bill are likely used for reference points. A Starbucks coffee actually ranges in price from $1.95 to $2.15 depending on the location.
|-
|Middle-left
|Pet Ownership. The {{w|ASPCA}} is the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. The most expensive animal on this list may seem surprising; rabbits cost an average of 35 dollars more than dogs and 70 dollars more than cats.
|-
|Bottom-right
|Four boxes indicate that the CEO pay has skyrocketed from $490.31 (hourly) to $5,419.97 (hourly) in the same time period in which the average worker's salary has grown 10 cents.
|}

====Thousands====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-right
|Hogwarts degree: a reference to {{w|Hogwarts|Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy}} from the popular book series by {{w|J. K. Rowling|J. K. Rowling}} about {{w|Harry Potter}}.
One box is the estimated yearly tuition for the school and the next is how much seven years at the school would cost. To get a degree at the school, it takes 7 years (starting at age 11, ending at age 18).
|-
|Bottom
|A reference to the song by {{w|Barenaked Ladies}} entitled "{{w|If I Had $1000000}}" and all the things referenced in the song to buy the love of another person.
|-
|Middle-Right
|A few items on the marriage of {{w|Wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton|Kate Middleton and Prince William}}, the major royal wedding of 2011, including:
*a {{w|Wedding dress of Kate Middleton|wedding dress with its own Wikipedia page}} of 3 times the annual per capita income of the average UK person,
*an 8-tier [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1381944/Royal-Wedding-cake-Kate-Middleton-requested-8-tiers-decorated-900-flowers.html wedding cake],
*and the flowers for the wedding. These re-appear in the Millions section of the graph, where they also list the costs for the security around the event ($20 million).
|}

====Millions====
{| class="wikitable"
|Left
|Dr. Evil's ransom demands from the film "Austin Powers" corrected for inflation between 1969 and 1997.
|-
|Middle-right
|Another reference to J. K. Rowling, comparing her (actual $1 billion) net worth as an author with her (imagined $82,000) net worth as a rapper.
The magnified 82 orange/red ($1,000) boxes are footnoted "Professional assessment by rapper/geek culture expert MC Frontalot." {{w|MC Front-A-Lot}} is the creator of the subgenre of {{w|hip-hop}} known as {{w|Nerd Core}}.
|-
|Middle
|An {{w|Lockheed Martin F-22 Raptor|F-22 Raptor fighter jet}} (valued at $154.5M) is compared to a Velociraptor ($1.9M in production costs for the film Jurassic Park)
|}

====Billions====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-Left ((Fictional)Billionaires section)
|{{w|Carlisle Cullen}} is from the {{w|Twilight (series)|''Twilight'' series}} of books and movies. He is a vampire and adoptive father of {{w|Edward Cullen|Edward}}, {{w|Emmett Cullen|Emmett}} and {{w|Alice Cullen (Twilight)|Alice Cullen}}, as well as {{w|Rosalie Hale|Rosalie}} and {{w|Jasper Hale}}. He was born in the 1640s and amassed his wealth through many years of compound interest and investments.
|{{w|Scrooge McDuck}} is a cartoon character from many {{w|Disney}} properties including the afternoon cartoon, ''{{w|Duck Tales}}''. Scrooge McDuck has a "money bin" full of coins and other sorts of collectibles that he routinely [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMU2NwaaXEA goes swimming in].
|{{w|Bruce Wayne}} is {{w|Batman}}. {{w|Batman}} is {{w|Bruce Wayne}}. He is portrayed in many comic books, graphic novels, TV shows and movies by many different actors.
|{{w|Artemis Fowl II|Artemis Fowl}} is an Irish child prodigy and a ruthless master criminal from the {{w|Artemis Fowl (series)|eponymous book series}}. He uses his intelligence to build his family fortune through crime.
|}

====Trillions====
{| class="wikitable"
|As Randall already indicated in the transcript, this is the block for world, continent and nation finances. The numbers are really huge. There are no jokes in here (apart from the fact that Randall tried to make the shapes of the GDP look like the continent), likely because financial values this large aren't funny to start with.
|-
|GDP is {{w|gross domestic product}}, the market value of all goods and services produced in a nation.
*The major chart in the center shows the development of the GDP in the world since the 1940s. So far the US GDP has always grown, except for a small reduction in the early 1980s, a flat line around the 1991 global recession and a flat line in the second half of the naughts. The world-wide GDP is growing more rapidly, but is also much more volatile.
|-
|In the middle of the box, it shows the worth of all gold ever mined in 2011 prices. This is important because of the concept of the {{w|gold standard}}, a concept where monetary values are linked to the value of gold. As indicated in the top-right of the box, both the EU and the USA have more debt than the total value of all gold in the world.
|-
|{{w|Derivative (finance)|Derivatives}} are a complex financial instrument where one is not trading in something tangible, but in derived values - like options. Derivatives thus are dangerous as one trades in concepts instead of values. Critics claim that derivatives are at the base of the 'economic bubble'.
*The growth of the derivatives market size is incredible - more than doubling every four years. The derivatives market thus is much larger than the GDP of the entire world.
*We get a reference to [http://landartgenerator.org/blagi/archives/127 a proposed project to power the world] by erecting massive solar farms out in the deserts. The area of Texas alone would be enough to match almost all of our modern power costs (though the people who live in Texas wouldn't enjoy being displaced).
|}

==Transcript==
:'''[This transcript is only reproducing text visible on the [https://www.xkcd.com/980/ front page comic]. For the full transcript of the [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png huge image], see [[980: Money/Transcript]].]'''

:[Title panel at the top left has one large heading, and then it is possible to read the first and third out of five lines (but not for instance the second line which is just the word "almost"):]
:'''Money'''<br>
:A chart of<br>
:all of it<br>
:[Below this there are 5 large panels, each with a series of plots, comparing the values of various things. The only clearly visible text is the title of each panel written in white on black background at the top of each panel]<br>
:[The first section covers single coffees up to the hourly salaries of CEOs. It is located below the title panel and there are a lot of green groups marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Dollars'''
:[The next section discusses values from around $1000 to $1,000,000, including a dissection of the song If I had $1000000. It is located directly below the Dollars section and has mainly orange groups (but also some green) marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Thousands'''
:[The third section focuses on $1,000,000 to $1,000,000,000, with a large section on campaign contributions of American political presidential campaigns, values of expensive works of art, and J. K. Rowling. It is located to the right of the Thousands section below the Billions section and there are a lot of gray groups (but also some orange) marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Millions'''
:[The fourth section gets into larger scale finances, profits of various sectors, costs of natural disasters, and net worths of the richest people on the planet. Also, Donald Trump. It is located to the right of the Dollars section and above both the Millions and Trillions section and has mainly yellow groups (but also some gray and red) all marked by unreadable text. There are, however, a few large headings that can be read:]
:'''Billions'''
:Education
:The Economic (...?)
:US household income
:Federal budget
:[In the last panel global financial status is described. It discusses derivatives, liquid assets, public debt by nation and GDP by continent, culminating with the total economic production of the human race to date. It is located below the Billions section to the right of the Millions section and has mainly cyan groups (but also one yellow) all marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Trillions'''
:'''[For the full transcript of the [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png huge image], see [[980: Money/Transcript]].]'''

==Trivia==
* Randall usually posts new comics at around midnight Eastern time, but this comic was posted at about noon. The reason is that it was difficult to get it all finished in time, as was explained in the [[Blag]] post titled [https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/11/24/money-chart/ Money chart] released three days later. This post also states that this was the first big project he undertook after his [https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/06/30/family-illness/ fiancée was diagnosed] with breast [[:Category:Cancer|cancer]].

* This comic used to be [https://web.archive.org/web/20211215032232/https://store.xkcd.com/products/money-poster available as a poster] in the xkcd store before it was [[Store|shut down]].

* Randall misspelled "communicat'''i'''on" as "communication" in the section on campaign donations, on the right of the "Millions" quadrant. This hasn't been fixed.

* This is the first xkcd comic featuring [[Donald Trump]].

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Playpen balls]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]
[[Category:The Lion King]]
[[Category:Harry Potter]]
[[Category:Ghostbusters]]
[[Category:Twilight]] 
[[Category:Disney]] 

[[Category:Climate change]] 
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Comics with xkcd store products]]
[[Category:Nuclear weapons]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Donald Trump]]
[[Category:Minecraft]]
[[Category:Comics with lowercase text]]
[[Category:Comics featuring politicians]]
[[Category:Comics with citations]]
[[Category:Jurassic Park]]
[[Category:Comics with custom header texts]]

980: Money

2026-06-29T16:53:31Z

FaviFake: Undo revision 415202 by 2A04:204:37A0:CA00:31E8:55F3:55CB:337E (talk)

{{comic
| number = 980
| date = November 21, 2011
| title = Money
| image = money.png
| titletext = There, I showed you it.
}}
{{TOC}}Clicking on the image on [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] takes you to an [https://xkcd.com/980/huge/ interactive] and much larger image. On the interactive image there are two links: one takes you to the [https://xkcd.com/980/sources/ sources and downloads] page where a list of sources and the [https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png full image] can be downloaded.

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|The US foreign aid section has a typo---it lists economic/humanitarian aid as equaling military aid when in fact (as of publication) it was much greater. Plus, the boxes have sizes not reflecting the numbers shown, further suggesting that this is a typo [[Special:Contributions/35.151.32.161|35.151.32.161]] 03:57, 6 December 2025 (UTC)

this should be added somewhere}}
{{Quote| I had a huge amount of fun putting the money chart together. It was the first time in a long time that my life’s been stable enough that I’ve been able to really disappear into a project—I’d almost forgotten how enjoyable it can be.|[[Randall Munroe]]|[https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/11/24/money-chart/ Source]}}

This is a [[:Category:Charts|chart]] comic - a type of comic that [[Randall]] does from time to time. He has for instance done [[256: Online Communities|maps of the Internet]] ([[802: Online Communities 2|twice]]!) and other huge visualizations like this chart [[Radiation]] with a similar structure as this chart but with Radiation as the subject. The Radiation chart is most likely the inspiration for this much more comprehensive Money chart.

In this money chart there are five boxes with items on different scales of monetary value denoting prices and values of many things, big and small (with the values contemporary to the comic's release in 2011; most are now more expensive due to inflation). Each scale of dollar increments are different colors. One dollar increments are green - naturally, because American paper money is green. Thousands are orange/red. Millions are gray. Billions are yellow. Trillions are blue. This comic uses {{w|Long and short scales|the short scale}} for naming large numbers (so a billion = 1000 millions = 10<sup>9</sup> rather than a million millions = 10<sup>12</sup> as in continental Europe).

Included in one frame is a small man with a red and white striped shirt, blue pants, a cane and a knit cap. He is known as Wally or Waldo (in the US) from the {{w|Where's Wally?|''Where's Waldo?'' books}}. To not give anything away for those who wish to search for him themselves there will be no spoiler here. But if someone needs a little help... Then by clicking this [[980: Money/Transcript#Billions|link]] you will be directed to the relevant section amongst the five sections where Waldo can be found. (The link will take you to that section of the full transcript page). If you still cannot find him (or give up in advance) then just search the transcript page for Wally or Waldo. There is a [[Header text#Money|unique header text]] for this comic.

The title text is a reference to the phrase "Show me the money!" which originates from the film ''{{w|Jerry Maguire}}''.

===Extra Money pages===
Since this comic is so big and complicated, extra pages have been created to include much more information than is wished for on this main page. These pages are listed here for convenience, but they are also listed in the relevant sections below:
* '''[[980: Money/Transcript]]''' - The full transcript of the entire comic can be found here. It is linked from the [[#Transcript|Transcript]] section.
* '''[[980: Money/Prices in tables]]''' The complete list of every item in the comic.

===Tables with explanations===
====Dollars====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-left
|The price of various common bills and commodities. The One Dollar Menu is a type of menu at various fast food restaurants. The one dollar bill and ten dollar bill are likely used for reference points. A Starbucks coffee actually ranges in price from $1.95 to $2.15 depending on the location.
|-
|Middle-left
|Pet Ownership. The {{w|ASPCA}} is the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. The most expensive animal on this list may seem surprising; rabbits cost an average of 35 dollars more than dogs and 70 dollars more than cats.
|-
|Bottom-right
|Four boxes indicate that the CEO pay has skyrocketed from $490.31 (hourly) to $5,419.97 (hourly) in the same time period in which the average worker's salary has grown 10 cents.
|}

====Thousands====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-right
|Hogwarts degree: a reference to {{w|Hogwarts|Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy}} from the popular book series by {{w|J. K. Rowling|J. K. Rowling}} about {{w|Harry Potter}}.
One box is the estimated yearly tuition for the school and the next is how much seven years at the school would cost. To get a degree at the school, it takes 7 years (starting at age 11, ending at age 18).
|-
|Bottom
|A reference to the song by {{w|Barenaked Ladies}} entitled "{{w|If I Had $1000000}}" and all the things referenced in the song to buy the love of another person.
|-
|Middle-Right
|A few items on the marriage of {{w|Wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton|Kate Middleton and Prince William}}, the major royal wedding of 2011, including:
*a {{w|Wedding dress of Kate Middleton|wedding dress with its own Wikipedia page}} of 3 times the annual per capita income of the average UK person,
*an 8-tier [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1381944/Royal-Wedding-cake-Kate-Middleton-requested-8-tiers-decorated-900-flowers.html wedding cake],
*and the flowers for the wedding. These re-appear in the Millions section of the graph, where they also list the costs for the security around the event ($20 million).
|}

====Millions====
{| class="wikitable"
|Left
|Dr. Evil's ransom demands from the film "Austin Powers" corrected for inflation between 1969 and 1997.
|-
|Middle-right
|Another reference to J. K. Rowling, comparing her (actual $1 billion) net worth as an author with her (imagined $82,000) net worth as a rapper.
The magnified 82 orange/red ($1,000) boxes are footnoted "Professional assessment by rapper/geek culture expert MC Frontalot." {{w|MC Front-A-Lot}} is the creator of the subgenre of {{w|hip-hop}} known as {{w|Nerd Core}}.
|-
|Middle
|An {{w|Lockheed Martin F-22 Raptor|F-22 Raptor fighter jet}} (valued at $154.5M) is compared to a Velociraptor ($1.9M in production costs for the film Jurassic Park)
|}

====Billions====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-Left ((Fictional)Billionaires section)
|{{w|Carlisle Cullen}} is from the {{w|Twilight (series)|''Twilight'' series}} of books and movies. He is a vampire and adoptive father of {{w|Edward Cullen|Edward}}, {{w|Emmett Cullen|Emmett}} and {{w|Alice Cullen (Twilight)|Alice Cullen}}, as well as {{w|Rosalie Hale|Rosalie}} and {{w|Jasper Hale}}. He was born in the 1640s and amassed his wealth through many years of compound interest and investments.
|{{w|Scrooge McDuck}} is a cartoon character from many {{w|Disney}} properties including the afternoon cartoon, ''{{w|Duck Tales}}''. Scrooge McDuck has a "money bin" full of coins and other sorts of collectibles that he routinely [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMU2NwaaXEA goes swimming in].
|{{w|Bruce Wayne}} is {{w|Batman}}. {{w|Batman}} is {{w|Bruce Wayne}}. He is portrayed in many comic books, graphic novels, TV shows and movies by many different actors.
|{{w|Artemis Fowl II|Artemis Fowl}} is an Irish child prodigy and a ruthless master criminal from the {{w|Artemis Fowl (series)|eponymous book series}}. He uses his intelligence to build his family fortune through crime.
|}

====Trillions====
{| class="wikitable"
|As Randall already indicated in the transcript, this is the block for world, continent and nation finances. The numbers are really huge. There are no jokes in here (apart from the fact that Randall tried to make the shapes of the GDP look like the continent), likely because financial values this large aren't funny to start with.
|-
|GDP is {{w|gross domestic product}}, the market value of all goods and services produced in a nation.
*The major chart in the center shows the development of the GDP in the world since the 1940s. So far the US GDP has always grown, except for a small reduction in the early 1980s, a flat line around the 1991 global recession and a flat line in the second half of the naughts. The world-wide GDP is growing more rapidly, but is also much more volatile.
|-
|In the middle of the box, it shows the worth of all gold ever mined in 2011 prices. This is important because of the concept of the {{w|gold standard}}, a concept where monetary values are linked to the value of gold. As indicated in the top-right of the box, both the EU and the USA have more debt than the total value of all gold in the world.
|-
|{{w|Derivative (finance)|Derivatives}} are a complex financial instrument where one is not trading in something tangible, but in derived values - like options. Derivatives thus are dangerous as one trades in concepts instead of values. Critics claim that derivatives are at the base of the 'economic bubble'.
*The growth of the derivatives market size is incredible - more than doubling every four years. The derivatives market thus is much larger than the GDP of the entire world.
*We get a reference to [http://landartgenerator.org/blagi/archives/127 a proposed project to power the world] by erecting massive solar farms out in the deserts. The area of Texas alone would be enough to match almost all of our modern power costs (though the people who live in Texas wouldn't enjoy being displaced).
|}

==Transcript==
:'''[This transcript is only reproducing text visible on the [https://www.xkcd.com/980/ front page comic]. For the full transcript of the [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png huge image], see [[980: Money/Transcript]].]'''

:[Title panel at the top left has one large heading, and then it is possible to read the first and third out of five lines (but not for instance the second line which is just the word "almost"):]
:'''Money'''<br>
:A chart of<br>
:all of it<br>
:[Below this there are 5 large panels, each with a series of plots, comparing the values of various things. The only clearly visible text is the title of each panel written in white on black background at the top of each panel]<br>
:[The first section covers single coffees up to the hourly salaries of CEOs. It is located below the title panel and there are a lot of green groups marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Dollars'''
:[The next section discusses values from around $1000 to $1,000,000, including a dissection of the song If I had $1000000. It is located directly below the Dollars section and has mainly orange groups (but also some green) marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Thousands'''
:[The third section focuses on $1,000,000 to $1,000,000,000, with a large section on campaign contributions of American political presidential campaigns, values of expensive works of art, and J. K. Rowling. It is located to the right of the Thousands section below the Billions section and there are a lot of gray groups (but also some orange) marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Millions'''
:[The fourth section gets into larger scale finances, profits of various sectors, costs of natural disasters, and net worths of the richest people on the planet. Also, Donald Trump. It is located to the right of the Dollars section and above both the Millions and Trillions section and has mainly yellow groups (but also some gray and red) all marked by unreadable text. There are, however, a few large headings that can be read:]
:'''Billions'''
:Education
:The Economic (...?)
:US household income
:Federal budget
:[In the last panel global financial status is described. It discusses derivatives, liquid assets, public debt by nation and GDP by continent, culminating with the total economic production of the human race to date. It is located below the Billions section to the right of the Millions section and has mainly cyan groups (but also one yellow) all marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Trillions'''
:'''[For the full transcript of the [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png huge image], see [[980: Money/Transcript]].]'''

==Trivia==
* Randall usually posts new comics at around midnight Eastern time, but this comic was posted at about noon. The reason is that it was difficult to get it all finished in time, as was explained in the [[Blag]] post titled [https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/11/24/money-chart/ Money chart] released three days later. This post also states that this was the first big project he undertook after his [https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/06/30/family-illness/ fiancée was diagnosed] with breast [[:Category:Cancer|cancer]].

* This comic used to be [https://web.archive.org/web/20211215032232/https://store.xkcd.com/products/money-poster available as a poster] in the xkcd store before it was [[Store|shut down]].

* Randall misspelled "communicat'''i'''on" as "communication" in the section on campaign donations, on the right of the "Millions" quadrant. This hasn't been fixed.

* This is the first xkcd comic featuring [[Donald Trump]].

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Large drawings]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Playpen balls]]
[[Category:Star Wars]]
[[Category:The Lion King]]
[[Category:Harry Potter]]
[[Category:Ghostbusters]]
[[Category:Twilight]] 
[[Category:Disney]] 

[[Category:Climate change]] 
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Comics with xkcd store products]]
[[Category:Nuclear weapons]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Donald Trump]]
[[Category:Minecraft]]
[[Category:Comics with lowercase text]]
[[Category:Comics featuring politicians]]
[[Category:Comics with citations]]
[[Category:Jurassic Park]]
[[Category:Comics with custom header texts]]

unixkcd

2026-06-29T16:52:22Z

FaviFake: fix

{{comic
| date = April 1, 2010
| title = unixkcd
| image = unixkcd.png
| titletext =
| lappend =
| ldomain = uni
| imagesize = 900px
| noexpand = true
| extra = yes
}}
{{series
| series = April
| number = 3
| date = April 1, 2010
| days_late =
| day_category = Thursday
| prev_title = 404: Not Found
| prev_date = April 1, 2008
| next_title = 880: Headache
| next_date = April 1, 2011
| extra_text = In fact, [[April Fools' Day comics|2009 and 2017 are the only years]] in which Randall hasn't marked this day with a comic.
}}

{{TOC}}
==Explanation==
{{incomplete|
*Explain the jokes and references in the [[#Undocumented commands]] section and the sections below it.
*Describe the website interface a bit, such as the links at the bottom.
*The cheat command actually says <code><nowiki>**free shipping enabled***</nowiki></code> and it needs an explanation}}
On April 1, 2010, [[Randall Munroe|Randall]] altered the [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] website to mimic a {{w|Unix}} {{w|command-line interface}}. This interface is still available on [https://uni.xkcd.com uni.xkcd.com] and the source code is [https://github.com/chromakode/xkcdfools available on GitHub]. The comic [[721: Flatland]], released on March 31, 2010, was still up on April 1, 2010, but was unrelated to the Unix interface. The terminal only lists a few available commands, but most commands are undocumented.

===Documented commands===
{| class="sortable wikitable"
! Command
! Response
! Explanation
|-
|<code>'''next'''</code>
|(''shows the next comic'')
|If the latest comic number is given, shows the error <code>Time travel mode not enabled</code>. See <code>'''[[#Undocumented commands|enable time travel]]'''</code> below.
|-
|<code>'''prev'''</code>
|(''shows the previous comic'')
|
|-
|<code>'''first'''</code>
|(''shows the first comic'')
|
|-
|<code>'''last'''</code>
|(''shows the last comic'')
|
|-
|<code>'''display [number]'''</code>
|(''shows the comic with the specified number'')
|Trying to display comic [[404: Not Found]] will result in an endless loading attempt.
Trying to display comic [[1350: Lorenz]] instead displays [[1349: Shouldn't Be Hard]], where Cueball thinks about burning his computer.
Trying to display comic [[2198: Throw]] will display an image from the comic showing George Washington throwing a microwave oven, with text saying to click to show the full comic up. Clicking the text does nothing.
|-
|<code>'''random'''</code>
|(''shows a random comic'')
|
|-
|<code>'''ls'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |(''shows the content of the current directory'')
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|<code>'''dir'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''cat [filename]'''</code>
|(''shows the content of the file'')
|See also <code>'''[[#Undocumented commands|cat]]'''</code> below.
|-
|<code>'''cd [directory]'''</code>
|(''changes to the specified directory'')
|
|}

===Undocumented commands===
{| class="sortable wikitable"
! Command
! Response
! Explanation
|-
|<code>'''<nowiki>:(){:|:&};:</nowiki>'''</code>
|<code>[...]</code> (''repeats indefinitely'')
|This command, otherwise known as a [https://askubuntu.com/questions/159491/why-did-the-command-make-my-system-lag-so-badly-i-had-to-reboot shell fork bomb] will make the terminal display the <code>[...]</code> loading dots indefinitely, as though it crashed.
|-
|rowspan="9" |<code>'''a/s/l'''</code> ''or'' <code>'''asl'''</code>
|
|{{w|Age/sex/location|A/S/L}} is not a Unix command, but an acronym of Age/Sex/Location in this case. The following replies are possible:
|-
|<code>2/AMD64/Server Rack</code>
|Answered as if the server replied. sex refered as {{w|AMD}}
|-
|<code>328/M/Transylvania</code>
|Answered by {{w|Dracula}}.
|-
|<code>6/M/Battle School</code>
|Answered by {{w|Ender Wiggin}} or another boy from battle school.
|-
|<code>48/M/The White House</code>
|Answered by {{w|Barack Obama}} or another male of the same age in the White House.
|-
|<code>7/F/Rapture</code>
|Answered by a {{w|Little Sister (BioShock)|Little Sister}} from {{w|BioShock}}.
|-
|<code>Exactly your age/A gender you're attracted to/Far far away.</code>
|Requests for A/S/L are often not answered truthfully, but crafted to suit the one asking the question.
|-
|<code>7,831/F/Lothlórien</code>
|Answered by {{w|Galadriel}} or another elf. Lothlorien is the region of {{w|Middle Earth}} where a particular group of elves live, and Galadriel is by far the most significant ''female'' elf from this (or possibly any) part of the popular stories.
|-
|<code>42/M/FBI Field Office</code>
|Answered by an FBI agent, referencing the old [https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ThereAreNoGirlsOnTheInternet trope] that all girls on the internet are FBI agents impersonating them.
|-
|<code>'''apt-get'''</code>
|<code>This APT has Super Cow Powers.'''</code>
|The <code>'''apt-get'''</code> command is part of the Debian package manager {{w|Advanced_Packaging_Tool|APT}}. This reply is one of the built-in Easter eggs.
|-
|<code>'''apt-get moo'''</code>
|
(__)
(oo)
/------\/
/ | ||
* /\---/\
~~ ~~

...."Have you mooed today?"...
|Displays an ASCII drawing of a cow.
|-
|<code>'''bash'''</code>
|<code>You bash your head against the wall. It's not very effective.</code>
|{{w|Bash}} is a shell for POSIX-based systems. This also references early text-based adventure games where you need to type the action needed to proceed, which could result in unintended consequences. For example, if you typed in something like "ax in chest", the game may stab the axe into your character's torso instead of opening a crate. The line 'it's not very effective' may be a reference to Pokemon, where an attack can deal differing amounts of damage depending on effectiveness.
|-
|<code>'''cat [number]/alt.txt'''</code>
|(''displays the title text of the specified comic'')
|
|-
|<code>'''cat license.txt'''</code>
|(''displays the license of unixkcd'')
|
|-
|<code>'''cat welcome.txt'''</code>
|(''displays the welcome message'')
|
|-
|<code>'''cat'''</code>

(''without a filename or with an invalid filename'')
|<code>You're a kitty!</code>
|A reference to [[231: Cat Proximity]].
|-
|<code>'''cheat'''</code>
| rowspan="2" | <code>'''<nowiki>***</nowiki>free shipping enabled<nowiki>***</nowiki>'''</code>
''(Links to [[Store|xkcd Store]])''
| rowspan="2" | 
|
|-
|<code>'''buy stuff'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''clear'''</code>
|(''clears the screen'')
|
|-
|<code>'''curl'''</code>
|(''creates an iframe to the URL specified'')
|[https://curl.se/ curl] is "command line tool and library for transferring data with URLs."
|-
|<code>'''date'''</code>
|<code>March 32nd</code>
|Instead of April 1st, which is not a real date.{{Citation needed}}
|-
|<code>'''display title text'''</code>
|<code><span style=" colour: red;">display: unable to open image "title": No such file or directory.</span></code>
|Displayed in red text.
|-
|<code>'''echo'''</code>
|<code>Echo ... echo ... echo ...</code>
|<code>'''{{w|Echo (command)|echo}}'''</code> is a command used to print text to the terminal.
|-
|<code>'''ed'''</code>
|<code>You are not a diety</code>
|{{w|Ed (software)|ed}} is a very simple text editor. It is usually not considered very user-friendly. See also <code>'''vi'''</code> and <code>'''emacs'''</code>.
|-
|<code>'''emacs'''</code>
|<code>You should use Vim.</code>
|A reference to [[378: Real Programmers]].
|-
|<code>'''enable time travel'''</code>
|<code>TARDIS error: Time Lord missing</code>
|A {{w|Doctor Who}} reference. See also the <code>'''next'''</code> command.
|-
|<code>'''exit'''</code>
| rowspan="3" |(''ends the terminal session'')
| rowspan="3" |
|-
|<code>'''quit'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''logout'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''find kitten'''</code>
|(''showed the {{w|robotfindskitten}} game'')
|The link to the Flash version no longer works, but an HTML version is available [http://robotfindskitten.org/play/robotfindskitten/ here].
|-
|<code>'''find'''</code>
|<code>What do you want to find? Kitten would be nice.</code>
|This links up to the above command <code>'''find kitten'''<code>.
|-
|<code>'''finger'''</code>
|<code>Mmmmmm...</code>
|<code>'''finger USER'''</code> is used on UNIX-like systems to get information about another USER. Here, Randall is taking advantage of its suggestive name, with 'finger' referring to an action where one sticks their finger in another's anus, usually for sexual pleasure.
|-
|<code>'''fuck'''</code>
|<code>I have a headache.</code>
|Though the command may have been intended as a profanity, it is interpreted as if a request for sexual intercourse. A stereotypical ({{tvtropes|MediaNotes/TheHaysCode|film-friendly}}) response to an expected but unwanted 'bedtime request' from an overamorous bed-partner is to claim to have a headache.
|-
|<code>'''goto [any]'''</code>
|(''shows comic [[292: goto]] and asks if you meant <code>'''display'''</code> instead.'')
|This jokes on how <code>'''goto'''</code> is viewed as a somewhat clumsy command to use - which is the subject of linked comic [[292: goto]].
|-
|<code>'''go back'''</code>
|<code>You cannot go back.</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''go down'''</code>
|<code>On our first date?</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''Hello Joshua'''</code>
|<code>How about a nice game of Global Thermonuclear War?</code>
|A reference to the {{w|WarGames}} movie.
|-
|<code>'''hello'''</code>
|<code>Hello.</code>
|A second reply <code>Why hello there!</code> is coded, but it is never used.
|-
|<code>'''help'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |<code>That would be cheating!</code>
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|<code>'''halp'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''hi'''</code>
|<code>Hi.</code>
|
|-
| rowspan="4" |<code>'''hint'''</code>
|<code>We offer some nice polos.</code>
| rowspan="4" |Randomly replies with one of four options.
The replies itself all have varied meanings, as follows:
*the first hint takes quite a surreal approach to it, saying that the comic somehow has nice {{W|polos}}.
*The second one is the only helpful hint of the four, saying how the comic will still remain at the link shown.
*The third one references <code>'''use the source luke'''</code> (see below).
*The last one says there are cheat codes to help use the interface. However, typing <code>'''cheat'''</code> just refers to the xkcd store, making this tip also useless.
|-
|<code>This terminal will remain available at '''<span class="plainlinks">[https://xkcd.com/unixkcd/ xkcd.com/unixkcd/]'''</span></code>
|-
|<code>Use the source, Luke!</code>
|-
|<code>There are cheat codes.</code>
|-
|<code>'''i read the source code'''</code>
|<code><3</code>
|The joke here is that you would be unlikely to type this question in without having read the source code, and discovered this command.
|-
|<code>'''irc [nick]'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |(''starts an {{w|IRC}} session on the xkcd channel on irc.foonetic.net'')
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|<code>'''write [nick]'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''kill'''</code>
|<code>Terminator deployed to 1984.</code>
|A reference to the {{w|The_Terminator|Terminator}} movie. In Bash, <code>'''kill'''</code> is used to end a process.
|-
|<code>'''latest'''</code>
|(''displays the latest comic'')
|-
|<code>'''light torch'''</code>
|<code>'''Light what?'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''locate [filename]'''</code>
|
|is normally used to locate a file in a directory. It will give humorous results when searching for <code>'''ninja'''</code>, <code>'''keys'''</code>, <code>'''joke'''</code>, <code>'''problem'''</code> and <code>'''raptor'''</code>.
|-
|<code>'''lpr'''</code>
|<code>PC LOAD LETTER</code>
|{{w|Line Printer Daemon protocol|<code>'''lpr'''</code>}} is a command to print documents. {{w|PC_LOAD_LETTER}} is a printer error.
|-
|<code>'''make love'''</code>
|<code>I put on my robe and wizard hat.</code>
|A reference to this [http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/bloodninja roleplay chat transcript] (NSFW), which was also mentioned in [[442: xkcd Loves the Discovery Channel]]. <code>'''make love'''</code> is a standard Unix joke, because the reply is <code>make: don't know how to make love</code>.
|-
|<code>'''make me a sandwich'''</code>
|<code>What? Make it yourself.</code>
|A reference to [[149: Sandwich]].
|-
|<code>'''man [command]'''</code>
|(''shows unhelpful information about the command'')
|Only <code>'''last'''</code>, <code>'''help'''</code>, <code>'''next'''</code>, <code>'''cat'''</code> have unique responses, all others show a generic "Oh, I\'m sure you can figure it out."
|-
|<code>'''moo'''</code>
|<code>moo</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''more'''</code>
|<code>Oh, yes! More! More!</code>
|The {{w|More (command)|more}} command is used to paginate output.
|-
|<code>'''nano'''</code>
|<code>Seriously? Why don't you just use Notepad.exe? Or MS Paint?</code>
|{{w|GNU nano|Nano}} is another text editor for Unix systems (see <code>'''vi'''</code> and <code>'''emacs'''</code>).
|-
|<code>'''ping'''</code>
|<code>There is another submarine three miles ahead, bearing 225, forty fathoms down.</code>
|The {{w|Ping (networking utility)|ping}} command is used to measure round trip times to a destination. The name of the command comes from sonar technology. A submarine using sonar may 'ping' to illuminate nearby submarines on radar.
|-
|<code>'''pwd'''</code>
|<code>You are in a maze of twisty passages, all alike.</code>
|The {{w|pwd}} command prints the current working directory (see <code>'''look'''</code>). The output is a reference to {{w|Colossal Cave Adventure}}.
|-
|<code>'''reddit [number]'''</code>
|(''shows the [https://www.reddit.com/ Reddit] voting bar for the specified comic'')
|If no number is specified, shows xkcd.
|-
|<code>'''rm [filename]'''</code>
|(''removes a file'')
|
|-
|<code>'''rm -r'''</code>
|(''removes a directory'')
|
|-
|<code>'''serenity'''</code>
|<code>You can't take the sky from me.</code>
|This is a line from the Balad of Serenity from the {{w|Firefly_(TV_series)|Firefly}} TV series. Serenity is also the name of an Operating System (that Randall probably wasn't thinking of): [https://www.serenityos.org/ SerenityOS].
|-
|<code>'''shutdown'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |<code>Must be root.</code>
| rowspan="2" |See also <code>'''sudo poweroff'''</code>.
|-
|<code>'''poweroff'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''ssh'''</code>
|<code>ssh, this is a library.</code>
|{{w|Secure Shell|ssh}} is the command to start a secure shell, but it also resembles the "{{w|Shh}}" sound.
|-
|<code>'''su'''</code>
|<code>God mode activated. Remember, with great power comes great ... aw, screw it, go have fun.</code>
|{{w|Su (Unix)|<code>'''su'''</code>}} is a command for logging as an upper user, which gives you full and potentially dangerous access to the system. On some systems, "{{w|With great power comes great responsibility|with great power comes great responsibility}}" is also part of a message that is printed the first time <code>'''sudo'''</code> is used.
|-
|<code>'''sudo [command]'''</code>
|(''executes the command with {{w|Superuser|root}} privileges'')
|
|-
|<code>'''sudo apt-get dist-upgrade'''</code>
|<code>You are already running [OS].</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''sudo apt-get moo'''</code>
|<code>Have you mooed today?</code>
|(apt-get Easter egg).
|-
|<code>'''sudo apt-get update'''</code>
|<code>Reading package lists... Done</code>
|Refreshes the package list so the system knows which updates are available.
|-
|<code>'''sudo apt-get upgrade'''</code>
|(''shows a link to [http://abetterbrowser.org/ A Better Browser] on Internet Explorer and Firefox (< v3). On all other browsers, it says ''<code>This looks pretty good to me.</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''sudo make me a sandwich'''</code>
|<code>Okay</code>
|Behaves like [[149: Sandwich]].
|-
|<code>'''sudo !!'''</code>
|(''will sudo the last command'')
|
|-
|<code>'''sudo poweroff'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |(''shuts down the system'')
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|<code>'''sudo shutdown'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''sudo reboot'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |(''restarts the system'')
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|<code>'''sudo restart'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''sudo rm -rf /'''</code>
|(''breaks all commands until the page is reloaded'')
|If this command is run in Linux, then it will simply delete everything in the distro it is run on.
|-
|<code>'''sudo sudo'''</code>
|<code><span style=" colour: red;">An internal error occurred: RangeError: Maximum call stack size exceeded</span></code>
|In red text.
|-
|<code>'''time travel'''</code>
|(''shows [[630: Time Travel]]'')
|
|-
|<code>'''top'''</code>
|<code>It's up there --^</code>
|The {{w|Top_(software)|<code>'''top'''</code>}} command shows a table of processes. Here it is taken literally.
|-
|<code>'''uname'''</code>
|<code>Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator</code>
|<code>'''uname'''</code> on Unix lists system information. The Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator is an explosive device created by Marvin the Martian in the {{w|Looney Tunes}} series.
|-
|<code>'''unixkcd'''</code>
|(''opens a new terminal window'')
|
|-
|<code>'''use the force luke'''</code>
|<code>I believe you mean source.</code>
|A reference to {{w|The Force (Star Wars)|the Force}} in the {{w|Star Wars}} franchise.
|-
|<code>'''use the source luke'''</code>
|<code>I'm not luke, you're luke!</code>
|An old programmers' joke.
|-
|<code>'''vi'''</code>
| rowspan="2" |<code>You should use emacs.</code>
| rowspan="2" |A reference to [[378: Real Programmers]].
|-
|<code>'''vim'''</code>
|-
|<code>'''wget [URL]'''</code>
|(''shows the content of the specified URL'')
|<code>'''{{w|wget}}'''</code> is a command on Unix to download the content and not show it.
|-
|<code>'''who'''</code>
|<code>Doctor Who?</code>
|Another {{w|Doctor Who}} reference. The <code>'''who'''</code> command on Unix lists the logged-in users.
|-
|<code>'''Whoami'''</code>
|<code>You are Richard Stallman.</code>
|The {{w|whoami}} command lists the name of the current user. [[Richard Stallman]] is the creator of the GNU project and the Free Software Foundation.
|-

|<code>'''xkcd'''</code>
|<code>Yes?</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''xyzzy'''</code>
|<code>Nothing happens.</code>
|{{w|Xyzzy_(computing)|xyzzy}} is a magic word, originally used in the game {{w|Colossal Cave Adventure}}. It was only effective at specific points in the game; otherwise the response was "Nothing happens." This response was actually a helpful clue to the observant adventurer, and became a famous meme in its own right.
|-
|<code>'''your gay'''</code>
|<code>Keep your hands off it!</code>
|
|-
|<code>'''!!'''</code>
|(''reruns the previous command after stating the command'')
|
|}

====Game commands====
There are also some other commands borrowed from a {{w|Zork}} like {{w|Text-based game|text-based adventure game}}.
{| class="sortable wikitable"
! Command
! Response
! Explanation
|-
|<code>'''look'''</code>
|(''describes your current surroundings'')
|
|-
|<code>'''go [direction]'''</code>
|(''moves you in the specified direction'')
|Going West repeatedly will list the refrain from the song {{w|Go West (song)|Go West}}.
|-
|<code>'''light lamp'''</code>
|(''lights your lamp'')
|You will be killed by a {{w|Grue (monster)|grue}} if you don't light your lamp when going south.
|-
|<code>'''sleep [seconds]'''</code>
|(''sleeps for the specified time'')
|Without specifying, the nap is 5 seconds.
|}

====Konami code====
[[File:Konami code.png|300px|thumb|The image used as the background after using the Konami code five times.]]The terminal also responds to the {{w|Konami code}} Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A. Entering this code repeatedly will, in order:
# Transform all characters to uppercase
# Add a grey text shadow
# Add an orange text-shadow
# Shake the screen
# Add a background image of [[Richard Stallman]] from [[345: 1337: Part 5]].

After entering the code at least once, commands such as "shutdown" and "apt-get update" will function as if you were using sudo.

Note that the last step is broken in 2026. The page [https://xkcd.com/unixkcd/over9000.png xkcd.com/unixkcd/over9000.png] still exists, but [https://uni.xkcd.com/unixkcd/over9000.png uni.xkcd.com/unixkcd/over9000.png] gives a 404.

==Transcript==
:[The screen is black.]
:[A white bar is at the top.]
:[Inside the white bar in black text is the title:]
:unixkcd
:[Below is another similar white bar with black text:]
:A webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language.
:[The text is white, monospaced, and in the top left, similar to that of a computer terminal.]
:[The terminal starts with the prompt:]
:guest@xkcd:/$
:[The terminal automatically runs the command:]
:guest@xkcd:/$ display
:[The most recent XKCD comic appears below the current line.]
:[The terminal runs the command:]
:guest@xkcd:/$ cat welcome.txt
:[The first line is bolded]
:Welcome to the unixkcd console.
:To navigate the comics, enter "next", "prev", "first", "last", "display", or "random".
:Use "ls", "cat", and "cd" to navigate the filesystem.
:[A blinking text cursor appears on the next line after the prompt, and you can type in commands to make the terminal do stuff.]
:guest@xkcd:/$

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:April Fools' Day comics|0800]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Richard Stallman]]
[[Category:Computers]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Interactive comics]]
[[Category:Comics with animation]]
[[Category:No title text]]
[[Category:Comics with inverted brightness]]
[[Category:Programming]]

2372: Dialect Quiz

2026-06-29T16:50:53Z

FaviFake: Undo revision 415091 by DiamondNether90 (talk)

{{comic
| number = 2372
| date = October 14, 2020
| title = Dialect Quiz
| image = dialect_quiz.png
| titletext = Do you make a distinction between shallots, scallops, and scallions? If you use all three words, do they all have different meanings, all the same, or are two the same and one different?
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is a parody of online quizzes that offer to compare the user's dialect of American English with others around the country. These quizzes generally contain questions about word usage, names for certain objects, and pronunciations that vary between different regions of the US. There are also quizzes about broader English dialects, but this comic focuses on commonly cited differences between American dialects.

The earliest quiz of this type to be widely disseminated online was the [http://dialect.redlog.net/ Harvard Dialect Survey], conducted in the early 2000s by Bert Vaux and Scott Golder. The survey created maps of the distribution of various word usage (such as pop/soda/coke for a fizzy softdrink) and was a relatively early example of widely shared Internet "viral" content. In 2013, Josh Katz of the New York Times created [https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2014/upshot/dialect-quiz-map.html a new version] based on the Harvard survey, which became the Times' [https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/01/-em-the-new-york-times-em-most-popular-story-of-2013-was-not-an-article/283167/ most popular content of 2013] and spread the idea to many more people. Many of the questions in this comic directly derive from entries in those surveys.

Randall's previous two comics have been about election predictions, leading up to the 2020 US General Presidential Election. A prominent predictor of the election results is [[Nate Silver]], who runs the FiveThirtyEight website. He [https://twitter.com/NateSilver538/status/1315348221565206530 posted his results] of taking the New York Times version of the survey on October 11, 2020, just three days before this comic was posted. [[2371: Election Screen Time]] specifically suggests that Randall may be spending too much time obsessing over new posts and content from the election predictors. It's coincidental, but likely, that Nate Silver's tweet inspired Randall's post: he was reminded of the 2013 feature from the Times.

; How do you address a group of two or more people?

* A) You
* B) Y'all
* C) I have not been around two or more people for so long that I can't remember

: Reference to the first question of the Times quiz: "How would you address {{w|You#Informal_plural_forms|a group of two or more people}}?" (with options including "you all", "you guys", "y'all", etc.). Option C may reference the significant decrease in human interaction and social contact during the COVID-19 pandemic. Alternatively, it may suggest that some xkcd readers are particularly introverted.

; How do you pronounce "Penelope"?

* A) Rhymes with "Antelope"
* B) Rhymes with "Develop"

: Both the options for this are wrong, making it the first of many quiz questions to be impossible to answer correctly. Neither Option A's "PEN-e-lohp" /ˈpɛːnəˌloʊp/ (possibly "PEEN-e-lohp" /ˈpiːnɪˌloʊp/) nor Option B's "pe-NELL-up" /pɪˈnɛləp/ are a typical pronunciation of this name (beyond mispronunciations). In English, the only correct way to pronounce this name is "pe-NELL-o-pee" /pəˈnɛləpi/, which is not listed. (A) is the answer Juan from Club Dread (2004) would have given, and the way video game parody band "Random Encounters" pronounces their second cat's name. In Questionable Content, this is also the way Faye pronounces Penelope's name in comic 725. Whether this is a coincidence or deliberate is unknown.

; What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?

* A) Astrology
* B) Agronomy
* C) Cosmetology

: The actual answer is {{w|astronomy}}, which is not listed, though several answers ''are'' listed that sound similar to fields that study stars. {{w|Astrology}} is the pseudo-scientific "study" of the influence of the stars and planets on our lives, including horoscopes, {{w|agronomy}} ''is'' scientific but instead studies agriculture, and {{w|cosmetology}} is the study of cosmetics and makeup (with a name close to {{w|cosmology}}, a branch of astronomy, and {{w|comet}}, an astronomical object). The last may also be referring to the occasionally makeup-heavy faces of movie and television "stars". [[:Category:Astronomy|Astronomy]] and [[:Category:Cosmology|cosmology]] are recurring themes on xkcd.

; How do you pronounce "genre"?

* A) Gone-ra
* B) Juh-neer
* C) Jen-er-uh

: Reference to a question found on some quizzes: "How do you pronounce ''genre''? ZHAHN-ruh, or JAHN-ruh?" A majority of (American) English speakers pronounce "genre" as either "'''ZH'''AHN-ruh" /ˈʒɔnrə/ (beginning with the "zh" sound found in "trea'''s'''ure") or "'''J'''AHN-ruh" /ˈdʒɔnrə/ (beginning with the "j" sound in "justice"). Neither of these are listed, and none of the quiz's pronunciation options are common. However, they are close to other words: ''GONE-ra'' /ˈgɔnrə/ sounds like {{w|gonorrhea}} /ˌgɔnəˈriə/, ''juh-NEER'' /dʒəˈnɪər/ is the way the second and third syllables of ''engineer'' are pronounced, and ''JEN-er-uh'' /ˈdʒɛnərə/ is close to how ''genera'' /dʒɛˈnirə/ (the plural of {{w|genus}}) is pronounced.

; Do you pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...

* A) First syllable
* B) Second syllable

: "Google" is not generally pronounced with a high-pitched yelp on either syllable.{{Citation needed}} On the other hand, {{w|Yahoo!}}, a competitor of Google, has advertised its services with a [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fm5FE0x9eY0 high-pitched yodeling jingle], with the high-pitched yelp on the second syllable (as opposed to {{w|Goofy}}'s [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-70mtXw35c iconic holler], with the high yelp on the first syllable).

; What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?

* A) Gutter pipe
* B) Drainpipe

: Reference to a quiz question in the Harvard and Times quizzes, "What do you call the thing from which you might drink water in a school?" Answers included "drinking fountain", "water fountain", and "bubbler". However, the question in this comic implies that school children (or at least the quiz maker) drink out of {{w|Rain gutter|gutter pipes}} or drain pipes, which are used to collect rainwater and/or {{w|sewage|should absolutely not be drunk from.}} This may be hinting at the fact that at that time some of the drinking fountains has been polluted by virus, and was considered "as dangerous as drainpipes".

; How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?

* A) Animated give
* B) Animated gift

: Reference to the "{{w|Gif}}" pronunciation debate, with people split between pronouncing it "gif" (with the hard-G sound in "graphics") or "jif" (with the soft-G sound in "giraffe"). Both options presented in this quiz use the hard-G sound, but neither option uses the standard pronunciation for the ending of the word, "if". The original authors of the standard clarified they intended it to be said as if "jif". Maybe it is entirely appropriate that their product, which lacks any audio stream, was made known to most of its end-users without a sound-guide and left everyone to spontaneously derive their own way of voicing its name. This is also a reference to [https://www.merriam-webster.com/words-at-play/gift-as-a-verb how some people dislike the use of the word "gift" as a verb, and think that "give" should be used instead].

; What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?

* A) What?
* B) Lawn buddies

: There are many different varieties of common insects with distinctive traits and behaviors, some of which even have multiple names; the creatures described "lawn buddies" combine three of these traits into one peculiar and somewhat frightening bug. The fact that no known creature like this exists forms the humor of the two answers: the first is reasonably confused, and the second is alarmingly familiar.

# The Harvard and Times quizzes actually include the question: "What do you call the {{w|Armadillidiidae|small gray bug}} that curls up into a ball when it’s touched?" (options include "roly-poly," "pill-bug", "potato bug", "doodle bug", etc.). It is also worth mentioning that "potato bug" itself can refer to three completely different kinds of insect; besides the aforementioned "{{w|Armadillidiidae|small gray bug}}," it can also refer to the {{w|Colorado potato beetle}} or to the {{w|Jerusalem cricket}}. A dialect quiz such as this one might ask the quiz-taker to identify what kind of insect they associate the term with.
# The {{w|Firefly|Lampyridae}} family of insects do glow (although not exactly "brightly"). These insects emit their light spontaneously, as a mating signal, though they often do emit light when shaken or presumably poked. These are variously called "fireflies," "glowworms," or "lightning bugs;" a dialect quiz might reasonably ask the quiz-taker's preferred term.
# {{w|cicada|Cicadas}} and {{w|Madagascar_hissing_cockroach|cockroaches}} can be large for insects, though nothing approaching the size of a baseball, and can make very loud noises indeed, although it would be a bit of a stretch to describe any of their associated sounds as a "warbling scream."

; What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?

* A) Prank lines
* B) Devil's Marks
* C) Fool-me lines
* D) Fauxguides
* E) Delaware lines

: Reference to the fact that some quiz questions ask about road features, such as "verge/berm/parking strip/curb strip" and "roundabout/traffic circle/rotary". However, these particular road lines, if they have ever been made, aren't common enough to warrant different names, unless the creator of the Quiz is referring to painted lines that haven't fully faded out of existence. The Delaware Line was a formation within the Continental Army. Devil's Marks may be a takeoff of [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Devil%27s%20Strip Devil's Strip]. Misleading lines on the road were also mentioned in [[1958: Self-Driving Issues]].

; What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer Solar System?

* A) Uranus
* B) Neptune

: This question references the fact that Uranus and Neptune are quite similar in appearance, as well as the two common pronunciations of Uranus: "YURR-ə-nəss" and "yoo-RAY-nəss" (which sounds like the phrase "{{tvtropes|UranusIsShowing|your anus}}", a favorite joke of little kids). The original Greek pronunciation is "oo-ra-nos", but this is not a common pronunciation among English speakers. It also references the fact that Uranus and Neptune are both blue-green colored planets in the outer solar system and are often confused by people who don't know much about them. (It's a common misconception that Neptune is dark blue, but [https://doi.org/10.1093/mnras/stad3761 it's actually blue-green].)

; What do you call this tool?
[[File:CloveHammer.png|150px|alt=Image of a claw hammer]]

* A) Banger
* B) Nail axe
* C) Wood mage wand
* D) I'm familiar with this tool but have no specific word for it
* E) I have never seen it before

: The only name most people would ever call this tool is a "hammer". The last two options reference options in many quiz questions like "I'm familiar with this but have no specific word for it" and "I am not familiar with this" (such as on the pill-bug/roly-poly question on the real quiz). These may appear as options to questions that ask about something that might not exist everywhere, or something which many may not have a word for (for example, some areas of the United States have a name for "sunshowers," while most don't). However, it's a bit absurd for these options to be present for this question (and this question alone), as virtually all users in an English dialect test would be expected to know what a hammer is. This also serves as a bit of reverse perspective on the saying, "{{w|Law of the instrument|When the only tool you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.}}"

; What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?

* A) A long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff
* B) A longwich
* C) A salad hot dog

: Reference to a common dialect quiz question: "What do you call a {{w|Submarine sandwich|long sandwich}}?" with options typically including "sub", "hoagie", "hero", etc. The first answer directly repeats the phrasing of the prompt, painting the person who would answer that way as either very literal-minded or bearing a snarky side. The hot dog answer could refer to the common online discussion: "Is a hot dog a sandwich?, and bears resemblance to jokes playing on synonyms to discredit their need for unique names, i.e. "Beef jerky is just a meat raisin." In this case, the argument would be "A sub sandwich is just a salad hot dog."

; What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?

* A) Lightbulb eater
* B) I have no special name for them
* C) I've never looked in my attic

: Another reference to the frequent appearance of quiz questions asking what users call various creepy crawlies. {{w|Millipedes}} best fit the description. They have many legs, though rarely if ever a thousand of them, as their name (from the Latin word for "thousand feet") suggests. The hard rings that separate an individual's body into segments give the animal a scaly appearance. And of the thousands of species, only a few have common names, hence "no special name for them". The reference to "lightbulb eater" is obscure, but may refer to the tendency of millipedes to congregate in large numbers in dark crevices, or perhaps Randall is simply conjuring more frightening creatures. Perhaps Randall found some in empty (no bulb) light fixtures in his attic, though it is possible this refers to another unknown frightening creature that nobody has a word for.

: Normally, questions about uncommon things would include an "I've never seen one" option, like option E in the hammer question. Instead, this question has "I've never looked in my attic" as an option, implying that these creatures are present in all attics, and anyone who doesn't know them would have to have never checked their attic at all, or that they are too afraid of this creature possibly dwelling in their own attic to go look.

; What do you say when someone around you sneezes?

* A) "What was that?"
* B) "Oh, wow."
* C) [Quietly] "Yikes."

: Reference to a question on some quizzes about which of several words/phrases you say in response to a sneeze, with usual answers including "bless you", "God bless you", and "{{w|Gesundheit}}" (from the German word for 'health'). This question may also be referencing the {{w|COVID-19 pandemic}} in answer C (and possibly answer B). Sneezing isn't a primary symptom of COVID-19, but most people are hyper-aware of possibly contracting the disease from the people around them so sneezes are treated with suspicion and it's seen as rude to sneeze openly. It is also possible that a person who has been able to catch a sneeze-producing condition has also caught COVID-19 and, while the sneeze itself isn't ''caused'' by it, the air and various airway fluids so forcefully projected are a possible infective vector with that little extra frisson of concern, given the current situation.

; Do you make a distinction between shallots, scallops, and scallions? If you use all three words, do they all have different meanings, all the same, or are two the same and one different?

: Phrased similarly to questions like one on the Times quiz, "How do you pronounce the words Mary, merry, and marry?" Options included "all three are pronounced the same", "all three are pronounced differently," or all three combinations of two being the same and one different. Also refers to the naming confusion around {{w|scallions}} and {{w|shallots}} - also known as 'eschalots' - but with the unrelated but similar-sounding {{w|scallops}} substituted in the middle.

: 'Shallots', 'scallions' and 'eschalots' are names used in different dialects, for various species and cultivars of onion used in cooking, either as a small bulb (especially [[wikipedia:shallot|Allium cepa var. Aggregatum]]) or as a long green leaf (especially [[wikipedia:Allium_fistulosum|Allium fistulosum]]). In many dialects, the green leaf type is called a 'scallion' and the bulb a 'shallot'. In at least one dialect (NSW Australia) the green leaf type is called a 'shallot' and the bulb an 'eschalot'. This causes confusion in recipes posted online. The word 'shallot' is also pronounced with emphasis on either the first or second syllable, as referred to in question 5. Despite the answer options offered, there is no evidence of dialects which use all three terms, or where 'shallot' and 'scallion' are interchangeable. Many people in the US call scallions "green onions", as was joked about in [https://genius.com/Stan-freberg-christmas-dragnet-lyrics Stan Frieberg's Christmas Dragnet parody].

: {{w|Scallops}} are invertebrate marine animals similar to oysters and clams, frequently harvested for food. In some regions of the UK and Australia potato {{w|fritters}} are also called 'scallops'. The word 'scallop' itself can be pronounced either as /ˈskɒləp/ or /ˈskæləp/, and its spelling has varied over time in a similar way to that of 'shallot'. However, these are difficult to confuse with shallots or scallions.

==Transcript==

[Box with title at the top]
:<big>Dialect Quiz</big>
[Smaller subtitle underneath]
:Compare answers with your friends!

[Quiz is divided into two columns. Answers to questions are indicated by a letter followed by a closed parentheses, such as A). These letters are greyed out]

[Column 1:]
<br>
How do you address a group of two or more people?
:A) You
:B) Y'all
:C) I have not been around two or more people for so long that I can't remember

How do you pronounce "Penelope"?
:A) Rhymes with "Antelope"
:B) Rhymes with "Develop"

What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
:A) Astrology
:B) Agronomy
:C) Cosmetology

How do you pronounce "genre"?
:A) Gone-ra
:B) Juh-neer
:C) Jen-er-uh

You pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
:A) First syllable
:B) Second syllable

What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
:A) Gutter pipe
:B) Drainpipe

How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
:A) Animated give
:B) Animated gift

What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
:A) What?
:B) Lawn buddies

[Column 2:]
<br>
What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
:A) Prank lines
:B) Devil's Marks
:C) Fool-me lines
:D) Fauxguides
:E) Delaware lines

What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer Solar System?
:A) Uranus
:B) Neptune

What do you call this tool?
<br>
[Image of a claw hammer]
:A) Banger
:B) Nail axe
:C) Wood mage wand
:D) I'm familiar with this tool but have no specific word for it
:E) I have never seen it before

What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
:A) A long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff
:B) A longwich
:C) A salad hot dog

What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
:A) Lightbulb eater
:B) I have no special name for them
:C) I've never looked in my attic

What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
:A) "What was that?"
:B) "Oh, wow."
:C) [Quietly] "Yikes."

==Trivia==

*The xkcd Twitter account posted a [https://twitter.com/xkcd/status/1316484953480323072 series of Twitter polls] asking the questions in this comic.
**How do you address a group of two or more people?
***You (31.2%)
***Y'all (33.5%)
***'''Can’t remember anymore (35.3%)'''
**How do you pronounce “Penelope”?
***'''Rhymes with “antelope” (58.6%)'''
***Rhymes with “develop” (41.4%)
**What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
***Astrology (34.5%)
***Agronomy (18.5%)
***'''Cosmetology (47%)'''
**How do you pronounce "genre"?
***Gone-ra (24.7%)
***Juh-neer (18.8%)
***'''Jen-er-uh (56.5%)'''
**Do you pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
***'''First syllable (63.6%)'''
***Second syllable (36.4%)
**What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
***Gutter pipe (32.9%)
***'''Drainpipe (67.1%)'''
**How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
***Animated give (29.6%)
***'''Animated gift (70.4%)'''
**What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
***What? (48.6%)
***'''Lawn buddies (51.4%)'''
**What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
***Prank/fool-me lines (14.8%)
***Devil's marks (22%)
***Fauxguides (22.5%)
***'''Delaware lines (40.6%)'''
**What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer solar system?
***'''Uranus (51.7%)'''
***Neptune (48.3%)
**What do you call this tool? 🔨
***'''Banger (29.7%)'''
***Nail axe (22%)
***Wood mage wand (29.1%)
***Don't know/not familiar (19.2%)
**What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
***'''That description verbatim (43.1%)'''
***A longwich (33.2%)
***A salad hot dog (23.7%)
**What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
***Lightbulb eater (29.5%)
***Don't have a name for it (19%)
***'''Never looked in my attic (51.5%)'''
**What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
***"What was that?" (8.6%)
***"Oh, wow." (17.1%)
***'''[quietly] "Yikes." (74.3%)'''
*Shallots, scallops, and scallions ran against each other in [[1529: Bracket]]

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:COVID-19]]

3111: Artificial Gravity

2026-06-29T16:48:46Z

FaviFake: not funny enough

{{comic
| number = 3111
| date = July 4, 2025
| title = Artificial Gravity
| image = artificial_gravity_2x.png
| imagesize = 423x365px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Low gravity can cause bone loss, so we're pleased to report that, since we initiated capsule motion, the number of bones in each crew member has been steadily increasing.
}}

==Explanation==
In a low gravity environment, such as a spaceship taking an interplanetary or interstellar voyage, the human body will experience slow but {{w|Effect_of_spaceflight_on_the_human_body|adverse side effects}}. Many prototype designs have been introduced to combat this, both in science fiction and real life. One of the most common (for non-fictional purposes, or in {{w|hard science fiction}}) is to use a rotating system to subject the crew to [[123: Centrifugal Force|centrifugal force]], simulating the effects of {{w|gravity}}. Examples of mimicking gravity using spinning elements are: the whole wheel-like space-station and internal living ring of the ''Discovery'', from ''{{w|2001: A Space Odyssey}}''; the extended rotating arms of the ''Hermes'', in ''{{w|The Martian (film)|The Martian}}''; the whole rotating structure of ''Endurance'', from the movie ''{{w|Interstellar (film)|Interstellar}}''.

[[Cueball]] instead describes a spacecraft in which the crew quarters are being continuously shaken back and forth across an axis. [[Ponytail]] immediately sees problems with this approach, and asks if the shaking pod can be replaced with a much safer and more stable spinning wheel or cylinder. Cueball concedes this argument, but reveals that the ship has already been built, launched, and is in operation, so the crew is stuck with the shaking pod setup. Apparently, nobody pointed out that there was a much better approach during the mission development.

A shaking spaceship design would create an experience of gravity for the crew — just a very unpleasant one. When the capsule accelerates "up" (from the point of view of the picture), the crew will feel a gravity-like force pulling them "down" against the capsule 'floor'. However when the capsule accelerates "down", the crew will find themselves thrown against what was the 'ceiling' of the capsule, but has now suddenly become the 'floor', in an experience similar to falling several metres. The direction of this artificial "gravity" will keep alternating as long as the capsule keeps shaking. This will result in the crew not only repeatedly falling against one surface or the other, but also at a variable apparent gravity as the capsule's lateral velocity changes. This might make their life onboard ship, which could (otherwise) be expected to last for many years, somewhat unpleasant.{{citation needed}}

This shaking system would also be wasteful of energy, since there would be losses due to friction at the joints between modules, as well as the energy costs of changing the motion of the crew module relative to the rest of the structure. In contrast, a rotating structure freely floating in a weightless environment tends to retain its motion, with negligible losses due to interactions with other bodies.

The title text discusses the form of bone density loss known as {{w|spaceflight osteopenia}}, caused by gravity loss. This 'loss' is a reduction in mass, not a reduction in number. Nonetheless, in this scenario the speaker claims that "the number of bones in each crew member has been steadily increasing". This is because the shaking, and subsequent multiple impacts, are fragmenting the crew members' bones. The broken pieces of bone are then being counted as bones in their own right and increasing the effective count, without telling if the pod's awkward configuration has done anything to reduce bone ''mass'' loss.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Ponytail are standing near a blueprint of a spacecraft with strap on boosters, with Cueball pointing at the blueprint. In place of conventional conical fairing, this spacecraft has a large mechanical arm on the nose. The arm is holding an egg-shaped capsule. Two semi-transparent drawings of the arm and the capsule are depicted on either side of it with speed streaks in between, implying shaking back and forth motion of the arm. There is illegible text on the top left the bottom right and the bottom right text is in box.]
:Cueball: To produce artificial gravity during the voyage, the crew capsule is kept in constant motion.
:Ponytail: Wouldn't it make more sense to spin it instead of shaking it, so the acceleration is steadier?
:Cueball: ...Listen. You, I, and the crew all wish we'd thought of that before launch.

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Space]]

2014: JWST Delays

2026-06-21T09:57:32Z

FaviFake: added Category:Comics with red annotations using HotCat

<noinclude>{{distinguish|1311: 2014}}</noinclude>
{{comic
| number = 2014
| date = July 2, 2018
| title = JWST Delays
| image = jwst_delays.png
| titletext = Since delays should get less likely closer to the launch, most astronomers in 2018 believed the expansion of the schedule was slowing, but by early 2020 new measurements indicated that it was actually accelerating.
}}

==Explanation==

The {{w|James Webb Space Telescope}} (JWST) is a {{w|space telescope}} created to be the successor of the {{w|Hubble Space Telescope}}. The telescope has been in development since 1996, but has been plagued by numerous delays and cost overruns. This comic was likely inspired by the most recent [https://nasa.gov/press-release/nasa-completes-webb-telescope-review-commits-to-launch-in-early-2021 delay announcement], which was posted on June 27, 2018. At that time, the JWST was scheduled to launch on March 30, 2021.

* In July 2020, this was pushed back further to October 31, 2021 due to the coronavirus pandemic.
* In June 2021, it was announced that the launch day will likely slip to at least mid-November 2021.
* On September 8, 2021, ESA announced that the official planned launch date is [https://www.esa.int/Science_Exploration/Space_Science/Webb/Targeted_launch_date_for_Webb_18_December_2021 December 18, 2021.]
* On November 22, 2021, NASA announced that the official planned launch date was delayed by four days to December 22, 2021, following a problem encountered when mating JWST to its payload adapter. This date was referenced in [[2550: Webb]].
* On December 15, 2021, NASA announced that the official planned launch date was delayed by two days to December 24, 2021, following a [https://www.space.com/james-webb-space-telescope-launch-delay-december-24 communications issue between JWST and the launch vehicle]
* On December 21, 2021, NASA announced that the official planned launch date was delayed by one day to December 25, 2021 due to [https://www.nasa.gov/feature/james-webb-space-telescope-launch-update adverse weather at the launch site]
* On December 25, 2021, the telescope was successfully launched, which Randall anticipated with this comic: [[2559: December 25th Launch]].

This comic portrays the launch delays and the new predicted launch years and the times at which those predictions were made. There have been so many delays in this project that you can plot a line of best fit with a surprisingly high degree of accuracy. Randall says optimistically that the line’s slope is less than one (there is less than one year of ''new'' delay per year of elapsed time), implying, of course, that if events continue without further intervention, it will eventually be built, with a predicted launch date of late 2026.

The title text alludes to the famous research over the {{w|Accelerating expansion of the universe|universe’s accelerating expansion}}. The expansion had been predicted to be slowing due to gravity from everything in the universe; instead, it was found to be accelerating since about 5 billion years ago. Here, Randall looks at the apparently ever-delaying schedule and observes that the delay per time does not decrease, although the date gets nearer (which should help to schedule the launch date, as research and unknown parameters are replaced with engineering and exact predictions and measurements). However, this delay inflation contradicts Randall's usage of a linear trendline. Given the {{w|COVID-19 pandemic}} brought some additional delays in 2020 and 2021, the "early 2020" date was perhaps unintentionally prescient.

The Wikipedia article linked above includes a {{w|James Webb Space Telescope#Cost and schedule issues|table}} which provides the data points for the chart:

{| class=wikitable
! width=35 | Year !! Planned<br />launch !! Time left<br />(years)
|-
| 1997 || 2007 || 10
|-
| 1998 || 2007 || 9
|-
| 1999 || 2007 to 2008 || 8-9
|-
| 2000 || 2009 || 9
|-
| 2002 || 2010 || 8
|-
| 2003 || 2011 || 8
|-
| 2005 || 2013 || 8
|-
| 2006 || 2014 || 8
|-
| 2008 || 2014 || 6
|-
| 2010 || 2015 to 2016 || 5-6
|-
| 2011 || 2018 || 7
|-
| 2013 || 2018 || 5
|-
| 2017 || 2019 || 2
|-
|2018 || 2020 || 2
|-
|2018 || 2021 || 3
|-
|2020 || 2021 || 1
|-
|2021 || 2021 || 0
|}

==Transcript==
:[Top caption, in the panel:]
:James Webb Space Telescope
:[Subtitle of top caption:]
:Launch Delays

:[There is a positive-quadrant only line graph. The x-axis is labeled 'Current Date' and the y-axis is labeled 'Planned Launch Date'. The dates on both of the axes range from 1995 to 2030.]
:[In the graph are 15 points, starting at (1997, 2007), and extending at a slope of a little less than one. The most recent one is labeled 'Now: 2021'.]
:[There are two lines on the graph: a red one and a dashed black one. The red one is a regression of the points on the graph. It has a slope of about ⅔. The black one is a line with a slope of one. They intersect at the point (2026,2026), marked by the label 'Late 2026?']

:[Caption below the panel:]
:Look, at least the slope is less than one.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Telescopes]]
[[Category:Space probes]]
[[Category:Line graphs]]
[[Category:Extrapolation]]
[[Category:Comics with red annotations]]

1193: Externalities

2026-06-21T09:56:37Z

FaviFake: forgot to remove this

{{comic
| number = 1193
| date = April 1, 2013
| title = Externalities
| image = externalities.png
| titletext = Mouse over words and things to see where they come from.<br><br>''[[:Category:Multiple title texts|Different title text]]:'' This comic went up on April 1st, and the panels changed throughout the day in response to readers doing things like breaking hashes, editing a rapidly-shuffling set of target Wikipedia articles, and donating to Wikimedia Foundation. (The vandalism is over now and CMU won the hashing contest.)<br><br><span style="color:grey">''Different title text:''</span> Happy April 1st, Everyone!<br><br><span style="color:grey">''Different title text:''</span> uic has the third best hash. See the full standings at http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv<br><br><span style="color:grey">''Different title text:''</span> The dog gains a pound for every $10 donated to the Wikimedia Foundation via this link. Currently at $51135.33
}}
{{series
| series = April
| number = 6
| date = April 1, 2013
| days_late =
| day_category = Monday
| prev_title = 1037: Umwelt
| prev_date = April 1, 2012
| next_title = 1350: Lorenz
| next_date = April 1, 2014
| extra_text =
}}
{{TOC}}

==Explanation==
This comic isn't a static image - even the title text changes depending on which part of the image you're hovering over. It presented a competition for students to see who could come closest to breaking a {{w|Skein (hash function)|Skein hash}} but also an aid appeal for the Wikimedia Foundation. The comic references multiple times {{w|Baidu}}, a large Chinese Internet services company. Baidu controls the predominant Internet search provider of China and is sometimes called the "Google of China" for the similar services it provides. Baidu Search results follow the censorship dictates of the Chinese authorities, causing it to return censored responses to searches for politically sensitive terms when executed by web browsers in China. Thus, Megan replies "But nothing about Tiananmen Square." in the first panel is a reference to the {{w|1989 Tiananmen Square protests and massacre}} that killed hundreds of civilians. "It takes great minds to stifle other great minds." and "Let's block Canada" in the second panel are also references to the arbitrary government censorship of Baidu and other Chinese companies.

The blank regions in the above image are dynamically generated from various sources.
*The university that is being recruited changes depending on which university is winning the hash finding competition in the fifth panel.
*The company doing the recruiting is randomly selected from a pool of companies. It was formerly the first NASDAQ-100 company mentioned on a varying Wikipedia page.
*The text in the second panel may vary: See [[1193: Externalities#Second Panel|this section]].
*The text in the third panel may vary: See [[1193: Externalities#Third Panel|this section]].
*The text in the fourth panel may vary: See [[1193: Externalities#Fourth Panel|this section]].
*The text in the fifth panel [[1193: Externalities#Fifth Panel|changes]], depending on which university is currently in third place in a hash finding competition. Clicking on the panel takes you to [http://almamater.xkcd.com/ a webpage] where people can enter their school's domain name and hash data, and ranks schools on how close their students can come to matching a Skein 1024 1024 hash value.
*The text in the top half of the sixth panel may vary. See [[1193: Externalities#Sixth Panel|this section]]. The second half of the panel is always the same.
*The last panel varies with the amount donated to the Wikimedia Foundation via [https://donate.wikimedia.org/?utm_medium=socialmedia&utm_campaign=xkcd_april1 this link]. For past images, see [[1193: Externalities#Seventh Panel|this section]].

===Hashing Competition===
For the two days until comic 1194 appeared, a competition was underway to see who could come closest to breaking a {{w|Skein (hash function)|Skein hash}}. The first text line of the first panel contains a link to http://almamater.xkcd.com. This page contained the text:

:Currently looking for Skein 1024 1024 input matching
<pre>5b4da95f5fa08280fc9879df44f418c8f9f12ba424b7757de02bbdfbae0d4c4fdf9317c80cc5fe04c6429073466cf29706b8c25999ddd2f6540d4475cc977b87f4757be023f19b8f4035d7722886b78869826de916a79cf9c94cc79cd4347d24b567aa3e2390a573a373a48a5e676640c79cc70197e1c5e7f902fb53ca1858b6</pre>

On this page, users were invited to enter "Your school's domain name" — presumably intended to be their college alma mater. (At least in the beginning, only a few top-level domains were accepted.) If the user entered an acceptable domain (by xkcd's rules, which apparently changed during the 48 hours of the competition), they could then enter data values one at a time. For each data value entered, xkcd returned a hash value and the number of bits by which it differed from the target value. The object was to achieve the lowest possible number of differing bits, ideally zero.

A ranking page showed the lowest value achieved for each domain name entered, but not the data that achieved it. The first name on the list was substituted in various panels, and the third-place school showed in panel five. No data values were reported by xkcd, but various results were posted by users of the xkcd forums and on other websites, leading to copycat submissions, so that occasionally large numbers of institutions would show the same moderately low value.

After the end of the contest, the data submission page vanished, replaced by the final list of rankings, which shows that Carnegie Mellon University achieved the best score with 384 bits incorrect out of 1024. The rankings only show a few hundred out of the several thousand domains submitted—presumably Randall chose to chop the copycat submissions off the end of the list, retaining only honestly obtained results.

===First Panel===
In some cases, Megan's reply seems to correspond to the company.
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you applied to [company] yet?
:Megan: The recruiter hasn't emailed me back in over three minutes.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you applied to [company] yet?
:Megan: The recruiter hasn't emailed me back in over an hour!
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: I'm not that good at math.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: What do they even do?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: I don't like monopolies.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: Only in my darkest moments.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Be part of the Apple experience!
:Megan: I'm not really a fan of turtlenecks.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work at Microsoft!
:Megan: I only came to this tech talk for the xbox giveaway.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Y U No Work Yahoo?
:Megan: I like working from home!
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Become a partner at Starbucks!
:Megan: But green's not my colour.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work in the Amazon!
:Megan: I don't have to actually move to South America, do I?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: Not after that presentation.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Thought about working for Intel?
:Megan: I'm not that great at division.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Dude, you should work at Dell!
:Megan: That catchphrase is so old.
|-
|
:Ahoy, carnegie melonites!
:Have you thought of a career at [company]?
:Megan: Not after that presentation.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Have you looked for a job at Kraft Foods?
:Megan: I'm allergic to sugar
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:How about working for Whole Foods?
:Megan: Could I afford the food if I did?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work at EBay!
:Megan: Maybe if they made a good bid.
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students!
:Come work for Activision... er... Blizzard... er...
:Megan: Activision Blizzard?
|-
|
:Hey, [university] students! <nowiki>|</nowiki> Ahoy. Carnegie Melonites!
:Come find your future at Baidu!
:Megan: But nothing about Tiananmen Square.
|}

===Second Panel===
The text in the second panel is based on the company in the first panel:
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:When the Singularity happens, it will happen here.
:Ponytail: [Company] has outgrown us.
:Men: It is time.
|-
|
:Think of ways to make things smaller and smaller!
:Ponytail: I'm worried mine is too big.
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:Think of ways to make things smaller and smaller!
:Ponytail: But will it blend?
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:You'll be part of a dynamic research team envisioning the future.
:Ponytail: It probably looks cool.
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:You'll be creating the future of commerce platforms!
:Ponytail: More recommendations.
:Men: Yep.
|-
|
:You'll be an insignificant cog in our giant machine
:Ponytail: We should improve Notepad
:Men: Nah
|-
|
:We can't tell you what you'll be working on.
:Ponytail: [Confidential]
:Men: [Redacted]
|-
|
:You'll be an insignificant cog in our giant machine
:Ponytail: Needs more Bob.
:Men: Nah
|-
|
:You'll help set the future of the company
:Ponytail: Wait. You hired a college grad as the CFO?
:Men: Yeahhh
|-
|
:At Qualcomm, we know you're born mobile.
:Ponytail: Born mobile!
:Men: Texting!
|-
|
:Short or tall, we've got a grande job for you!
:Ponytail: How many job openings are there?
:Men: Ele-venti or so.
|-
|
:You'll help direct the future of nutrition
:Ponytail: Microwaveable toast
:Men: Delicious
|-
|
:Help us find and provide the best healthy, local, and sustainable products.
:Ponytail: Hey guys, how about kale cookies?
:Men: Sounds great!
|-
|
:We're the Classmates.com to Facebook's Craigslist.
:Ponytail: Maybe we should use game theory.
:Men: Why Bother?
|-
|
:Whatever. Come create the future of gaming!
:Ponytail: Call of Duty 14.
:Men: That's genius!
|-
|
:It takes great minds to stifle other great minds.
:Ponytail: Let's block Canada
:Men: Sounds good.
|}

===Third Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:We're a convenient four hour drive from New York City (15,000 hours by Roomba)
|-
|
:Only a short commuter flight away!
|-
|
:Travel to us by Roomba, we're *that* close!
|-
|
:We're so close you can get to us by Roomba.
|-
|
:Free Roomba rides every morning while you have coffee.
|-
|
:Your Roomba comes in black & slate, or white & silver
|-
|
:Just a short Roomba ride up the coast, try not to fall off.
|-
|
:We know what everyday life is like for your generation:
|}

===Fourth Panel===
{| class="wikitable sortable plainlinks table-padding"
|-
|
:Our recruiting team is on the lookup for promising young [university] graduates.
|-
|
:We hired a new recruiting startup to help us hire [university] students.
|-
|
:We borrowed the botanical gardens' net to catch promising recruits.
|-
|
:We prefer to recruit from [university] students, of course.
|-
|
:Our recruiters are on the hunt for unaware [university] graduates.
|}

===Fifth Panel===

{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:Or students from [university], if they're clever with their applications
|-
|
:Possibly [university] grads, if their form-filling startup works out.
|-
|
:Or [university] graduates, provided any of them manage to fill out the application correctly.
|-
|
:Or [university] graduates, if they manage to fill out the application correctly.
|}

The text in the form varies independently of the text at the top, sometimes related to the organization in 3rd place:

{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
!Organization
!Name
!Email
!Education
!(Explanation)
|-
|MIT
|Oliver Smoot
|pgp encrypted
|have you ever really looked at the fourier
|As an undergrad at MIT in 1948, Smoot was used to measure the Harvard Bridge during a fraternity prank. This led to the introduction of "{{w|smoot}}" as an unusual unit of length.
|-
|
|Wheeeee
|ford.com
|stealing lunches from startups
|-
|CMU
|leeroy jenkins
|me@car
|I can cut up melons
| Le(e)roy Jenkins is an internet meme originating from a 2006 'Let's Play' video of World of Warcraft
|-
|CMU
|pittsburgh
|me@car
|I can cut up melons
|-
|
|SEGMENTATION FAULT
|save trees
|Contra dancing.
|-
|Cambridge
|I'm applying
|cam.gov
|on going problems with birds
|-
|
|certainly
|elephant
|An excellent year in the Sahara
|-
|Stanford
|Stanford
|ford.com
|Stealing lunches from startups
|-
|Stanford
|Yes Please
|@twitter
|Are you Stanford?
|-
|
|Applying
|For a job
|I would like to work at you
|-
|St.Olaf
|Me olaf
|You Helga
|Hunting wooly mammoths
|-
|Ohio State
|Oh!
|IO
|O HAI O
| A joke on the pronunciation of Ohio.
|-
|
|FOLLOWBACK
|TOTALLY.EDU.US
|CONVENIENT US DOMAIN REDIRECTS
| .edu is a website suffix mostly used for (American) university websites.
|-
|
|Mancher
|Outlook
|Made a collage out of macaroni
|-
|Stanford
|Yes Please
|ford.com
|Are you Stanford?
|-
|Michigan
|ANN
|SOUTH DETROIT
|HUNT LIKE A WOLVERINE
|University of Michigan is in Ann Arbor; the mascot is the Wolverine. "South Detroit" is referenced in the song {{w|Don't Stop Believin'}}, which is notable because there is actually no such city or neighborhood; rather, Detroit is one of the only places in the contiguous United States where you can drive south and wind up in Canada, namely in the city of {{w|Windsor, Ontario}}. Michiganders therefore often object to the bad geography in the song.
|-
|
|christopher
|POBox 12532
|p.s. ill find my frog
|PO Box 12532 is located at Pyramid Lake in Nevada.
|-
|Oxford
|Bond, James
|Righto
|We're better than Cambridge
|-
|
|Which one
|Forget it
|Riding the L all night long
|-
|Kit
|Kat
|Oh dear
|Something something sleep
|-
|Google
|My G+ handle?
|Any
|I'm feeling lucky
|G+ stands for Google+, Google's defunct social network. "I'm feeling lucky" is the second option under the searchbar on Google.
|-
|UIC
|Which one
|Forget it
|Riding the L all night long
|Presumably University of Illinois at Chicago. "Which one" could be a reference to other institutions with the same initials, or people who confuse "UIC" with "U of C" (University of Chicago, a different institution altogether). The rapid transit system in Chicago is called the 'L'.
|-
|
|MY JOB NOW
|@
|SAVE DOCUMENT AND SEND
| Could be Randall saying most jobs are just sending e-mails (@).
|}

===Sixth Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|
:At [company], you'll work at a scale you won't find anywhere else
|-
|
:Explore the depths of expensive and undocumented tools!
|-
|
:At Apple, we believe in pushing the boundary of perfection.
|-
|
:At Microsoft, you just need to relax and embrace the machine
|-
|
:Yahoo management aren't just suits. We code too!
|-
|
:At [company], you'll have the opportunity to work on cutting-edge projects.
|-
|
:At Amazon, you'll be shaving the most cutting-edge of yaks.
|-
|
:You get to bid first on any auction, and use other experimental tools!
|-
|
:At QUALCOMM, Device driver code quality is job #1
|-
|
:Make use of our powerful in-house game creation tools.
|-
|
:We're even working on some experimental biotechnology
|}

===Seventh Panel===
{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
|[[File:externality-dog1.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog2.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog2A.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog3.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog4.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog5.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog6.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog7.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog8.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog9.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog10.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog12.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog13.png]]
|-
|[[File:externality-dog14.png]]
|}

===Title Text===
{{incomplete|Need to explain the 5th panel's title text.}}

The title text documents the different sources of data in the comic. The different title texts are:

{| class="wikitable table-padding"
|-
!Comic region
!Title text
! Explanation
|-
|Most of the comic, during the competition.||Mouse over words and things to see where they come from.||Different title texts are for different panels, as explained in this one.
|-
|Most of the comic, after the competition ended||This comic went up on April 1st, and the panels changed throughout the day in response to readers doing things like breaking hashes, edited a rapidly-shuffling set of target Wikipedia articles, and donating to Wikimedia Foundation. (The vandalism is over now and CMU won the hashing contest.)||This is one of the comics like [[3227: Creation]], where the title text explains the update instead of containing a joke or two.
|-
|The part of the first panel (text and drawing) which is not a link. There is no title text at all over the part where the link is active||Happy April 1st, Everyone!||The title text celebrates April 1st.
|-
|Fifth panel.||[University] has the third best hash. See the full standings at http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv (University = uic after competition)||
|-
|Last three panels (only within a frame that would just fit around all three of them).||The dog gains a pound for every $10 donated to the wikimedia foundation via this link. Currently at [amount donated] (Amount = $51135.33 after competition).||A joke where the dog weighs about 5113.533 pounds currently and will gain a pound for every $10 donated to Wikimedia foundation.
|}

==Transcript==
:[This was a dynamic image where the text changed during April 1st. The main title text also changed after the dynamic part was finished, and there are even different title text for different part of the comic. This transcript is of the final version of the comic, (no longer dynamic or changing), as displayed at present on xkcd, there are still four different title texts for specific panels. These four title text are for that reason included here in the transcript.]

:[The basic title text for the entire comic is: "This comic went up on April 1st, and the panels changed throughout the day in response to readers doing things like breaking hashes, edited a rapidly-shuffling set of target Wikipedia articles, and donating to Wikimedia Foundation. (The vandalism is over now and CMU won the hashing contest.)" The other three title text are only active over certain panels.]

:[The first panel with the caption and Megan below has its own title text. A part of that panel is a link, and in the section where this link is active there is no title text at all. The title text for the rest of the first panel is: "Happy April 1st, everyone!"]

:[A panel with only text is above the first drawing. There is a link on the top part of the text to <nowiki>http://almamater.xkcd.com/</nowiki> (the link is now broken).]
:Ahoy, carnegie melonites!
:
:Come find your future at Baidu.

:[Below, not in a frame, is Megan.]
:Megan: But nothing about Tiananmen Square.

:[Caption floating above the frame of the next panel:]
:It takes great minds to stifle other great minds.
:[Ponytail sits at a desk, hand to her chin, with two Cueball-like guys with their hands on the table.]
:Ponytail: Let's block Canada
:Cueball-like guys: Sounds good.

:[Ponytail crouches on a moving Roomba (labeled) with a steaming mug of coffee in one hand and a smartphone in the other. Above her is a caption. The Roomba makes a noice]
:We're a convenient four hour drive from New York City (15,000 hours by Roomba.)
:''Whirrrrrrr''
:Roomba

:[Ponytail and Hairy corners Cueball as he walks out of a door, and a black haired ponytailed girl is moving towards him wielding a giant butterfly net. There is a caption above them:]
:Our recruiters are on the hunt for unaware CMU graduates

:[The fifth panel has its own title text only active within (or very close to) the frame. It is: "uic has the third best hash. See the full standings at <nowiki>http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv</nowiki>" (The link is now broken)]

:[There is a caption above a website application. There is three fields to be filled, with each their caption and text:]
:or uic graduates, provied any of them manage to fill out the application correctly.
::Name which one
::Email forget it
::Education Riding the L all night long

:[Caption floating above the frame of the next panel:]
:At Baidu, Inc., you'll have the opportunity to work on cutting-edge projects.
:[Cueball sits at a computer.]
:Cueball: What does "make dog" do?
:Off-screen voice: Experimental dog generator. Don't click on it; the default size isn't set, so-
:'''*click*'''

:[The last three panels has their own title text, only active within a frame that could contain all three panel. Outside that "frame" (all the way around) is the other title text. Within the title text is: "The dog gains a pound for every $10 donated to the Wikimedia Foundation via this link. Currently at $51135.33."]

:[Small insert panel, going in above the next larger panel: Cueball stares at the screen.]
:''Kzzzt''
:''*bip*''
:Off-screen voice: Uh oh.

:[A giant dog looks down at the desk where the computer once was, now only the wires are left. Cueball, leaning way back in his office chair, holding his hand to his mouth, stares up at it.]

:[Again a smaller insert panel above the large one with the dog. A graphic showing two sliders and a dog (similar to the one in the previous panel). Next to the dog with arrows pointing to it are a thermometer graphic and an equation. Below is an e-mail type text and finally a caption. There are arrows over and under "God" and "dogs" between the g and d's.]
:d(x)=R
:careers@baidu, Inc.
:'''Play God with dogs.'''<sup>TM</sup>

==Trivia==
*This is the first [[xkcd]] comic with [[:Category:Multiple title texts|multiple title texts]], the others being [[1663: Garden]] and [[3074: Push Notifications]].
*At one point, this comic looked blank entirely. However, in January 2024, the bug was fixed.
*The gap between this [[:Category:Dynamic comics|dynamic comic]] and the previous one was only a week, being the shortest gap between dynamic comics in all of xkcd. However, one of the title texts confirms that this was the April Fools' Day comic and not [[1190: Time]].

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Science]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Dogs]]
[[Category:Roomba]]
[[Category:Butterfly net]]
[[Category:Singularity]]
[[Category:Multiple title texts]]
[[Category:Comics edited after their publication]]

Title text

2026-06-21T09:44:34Z

FaviFake:

<noinclude>{{xkcd.com}}[[File:xkcd_comic.png|thumb|right|250px|The [[Design of xkcd.com#Comic section|Comic section]] is one of the [[Design of xkcd.com|four main sections]] of the [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] website.]]{{TOC}}[[File:tt.png|right|thumb|The title text for [[2760: Paleontology Museum]]]]
{{incomplete|
* Explain the use of title texts in the images of his ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' articles (explained [[what if? (blog)|here]]) and how the use changed from describing the image to adding jokes.}}
The '''title text''', also known as {{w|mouseover|mouseover text}} or {{w|tooltip}}, is an {{w|HTML attribute}} [[Randall Munroe|Randall]] puts on [[:Category:No title text|almost every xkcd comic]] to add something tangentially relevant to the topic of the comic. In some of the early comics, the title text was also used to comment on how they were drawn (see [[24: Godel, Escher, Kurt Halsey]]) and explain the joke (see [[5: Blown apart]]). In [[:Category:No title text|a few comics]], the title text is missing. The comic with the longest title text is [[1363: xkcd Phone]] (816 characters), while [[1311: 2014]] has the title text with the highest word count (134 words).

==How to access==
{{Quote|[T]o my knowledge none of the comics were ever missing a tooltip. It's all in a database (overbuilt, I know) and I think I would have noticed an empty field. More likely someone was just confused by their browser's erratic tooltip display behavior. Sometimes you have to do little incantations (or mouse over a link and then back onto the picture) to get them to appear.|[[Randall Munroe]]|{{w|Talk:Xkcd/Archive_1#All but one...|Source}}}}

Then title text can be accessed in many ways:
* By hovering the mouse pointer over the image on the main site;
* By clicking or tapping the "<sup>(alt-text)</sup>" button next to the comic title on the [https://m.xkcd.com mobile site];
* By viewing the [[Transcript|official transcript]] of the comics;
* By installing a [[Browser helpers|browser helper]];
* By opening the info.0.json file, for example [http://xkcd.com/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/info.0.json], [http://xkcd.com/485/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/485/info.0.json] or [http://xkcd.com/412/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/412/info.0.json]

==History==
Randall didn't add title texts to his comics before [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com], but most of the comics posted on [[LiveJournal]] had an original caption beneath the image, and many had comments by LiveJournal users. All the comics transferred to the new site had a title text, which was often along the same lines, but was almost never the same as the caption on LiveJournal. Learn more at [[LiveJournal]].

Randall uses the "title" attribute rather than the {{w|Alternative text for images|"alt" attribute}} in the HTML sources. In the [https://xkcd.com/rss.xml comics feed] and [https://xkcd.com/info.0.json API data] the "alt text" is labelled "alt". Randall has, at times, refer to "alt text", with one early comic example being the title text of [[45: Schrodinger]], though that can equally be read as referring to the accompanying "alt=" parameter given to the image, "Schrodinger", as far as the implied joke goes. In [[442: xkcd Loves the Discovery Channel]], the title text reads "I love the title-text!" as a part of the song, being one of the instances where Randall calls it "title text." However, he includes a hyphen as well.

In [[xkcd: volume 0]], comics sometimes use a different title text, like how in [[77: Bored with the Internet]], "This was before Twitter et. al. Now we just post while doing it." is the book's title text rather than the original title text: "I used to do this all the time."

===Firefox bug===
{{w|Firefox 2}} used to have a long-standing bug where only the initial part of the title text was shown as a tooltip. Firefox didn't show you the rest of the text unless you right-clicked show-property, and you would be able to see a sideways scrollable field of the title-text in the properties for the image. This bug was referenced in the title text of [[491: Twitter]] ("If long tooltips / cut off for you / then upgrade from / Firefox 2 / Burma Shave") and is still mentioned in [https://xkcd.com/about xkcd.com's About page]:

{{Quote|<big>'''Why can't I read the whole comic mouseover text in Firefox?'''</big>

''They can be read with extensions like [https://addons.mozilla.org/firefox/1715/ Long Titles], or by right-clicking on the images and going to 'properties', then clicking and dragging to read the whole thing. This is a bug in [https://bugzilla.mozilla.org/show_bug.cgi?id{{=}}45375 Firefox, Mozilla Bug #45375]. It has been outstanding for many years now.

''Note: It looks like it's been fixed in Firefox 3.0. Now, as an added tweak, to keep the tooltips from expiring while you're reading, you can use [https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/11233 this].|[[Randall Munroe]]|[https://xkcd.com/about About xkcd]}}

==Comics without a title text==
While most comics have one title text, some extra comics have [[:Category:No title text|no title text]]. In addition, [[404: Not Found]] lacks a title text due to delivering the standard {{w|Nginx}} "Page Not Found" message that does not even have any image to conceivably have an associated title text applied to it. [[1506: xkcloud]] is the first numbered comic other than [[404: Not Found]] to lack a title text, as certain interactive comics beyond number 1500 use a different format, removing the ability to add mouseover text. [[1525: Emojic 8 Ball]] and [[1608: Hoverboard]] also have no title text. Due to a bug in the JavaScript in [[3227: Creation]], the title text disappears while on Stained Glass Mode. It is also impossible to access the title text when on that comic's Airplane Mode, because the comic flies too quickly.

==Comics with multiple title texts==
Sometimes a comic can have [[:Category:Multiple title texts|more than one title text]]. [[1193: Externalities]] was the first to have more than one title text, changing through the panels. [[1663: Garden]] also had multiple title texts. In addition to the main one (which said "Relax."), there are two different title texts for the two buttons, and one other one saying "null." In [[3074: Push Notifications]], in addition to the main title text (like in [[1663: Garden|1663]]), there is an extra one when you hover over the cat, reading ":3".

[[Category:Design of xkcd.com]]{{xkcdmeta}}

Title text

2026-06-15T16:56:57Z

FaviFake: this is kind of irrelevant now

<noinclude>{{xkcd.com}}[[File:xkcd_comic.png|thumb|right|250px|The [[Design of xkcd.com#Comic section|Comic section]] is one of the [[Design of xkcd.com|four main sections]] of the [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] website.]]{{TOC}}[[File:tt.png|right|thumb|The title text for [[2760: Paleontology Museum]]]]
{{incomplete|
*Explain that Randall previously ''erroneously'' called it "alt text" (like in [[45]]) and mouseover text, but he more recently calls it "title text", like in [[442]]. (Give a bit of history.) Add more comics/examples of Randall calling it "alt text", "mouseover text", and "title" text.

* Explain that in the book [[xkcd: volume 0]], comics sometimes include a different title text.

* Explain the use of title texts in the images of his ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' articles (explained [[what if? (blog)|here]]) and how the use changed from describing the image to adding jokes.}}
The '''title text''', also known as {{w|mouseover|mouseover text}} or {{w|tooltip}}, is an {{w|HTML attribute}} [[Randall Munroe|Randall]] puts on [[:Category:No title text|almost every xkcd comic]] to add something tangentially relevant to the topic of the comic. In some of the early comics, the title text was also used to comment on how they were drawn (see [[24: Godel, Escher, Kurt Halsey]]) and explain the joke (see [[5: Blown apart]]). In [[:Category:No title text|a few comics]], the title text is missing. The comic with the longest title text is [[1363: xkcd Phone]] (816 characters), while [[1311: 2014]] has the title text with the highest word count (134 words).

==How to access==
{{Quote|[T]o my knowledge none of the comics were ever missing a tooltip. It's all in a database (overbuilt, I know) and I think I would have noticed an empty field. More likely someone was just confused by their browser's erratic tooltip display behavior. Sometimes you have to do little incantations (or mouse over a link and then back onto the picture) to get them to appear.|[[Randall Munroe]]|{{w|Talk:Xkcd/Archive_1#All but one...|Source}}}}

Then title text can be accessed in many ways:
* By hovering the mouse pointer over the image on the main site;
* By clicking or tapping the "<sup>(alt-text)</sup>" button next to the comic title on the [https://m.xkcd.com mobile site];
* By viewing the [[Transcript|official transcript]] of the comics;
* By installing a [[Browser helpers|browser helper]];
* By opening the info.0.json file, for example [http://xkcd.com/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/info.0.json], [http://xkcd.com/485/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/485/info.0.json] or [http://xkcd.com/412/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/412/info.0.json]

==History==
Randall didn't add title texts to his comics before [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com], but most of the comics posted on [[LiveJournal]] had an original caption beneath the image, and many had comments by LiveJournal users. All the comics transferred to the new site had a title text, which was often along the same lines, but was almost never the same as the caption on LiveJournal. Learn more at [[LiveJournal]].

Randall uses the "title" attribute rather than the {{w|Alternative text for images|"alt" attribute}} in the HTML sources. In the [https://xkcd.com/rss.xml comics feed] and [https://xkcd.com/info.0.json API data] the "alt text" is labelled "alt". Randall has, at times, refer to "alt text", with one early comic example being the title text of [[45: Schrodinger]], though that can equally be read as refering to the accompanying "alt=" parameter given to the image, "Schrodinger", as far as the implied joke goes.

===Firefox bug===
{{w|Firefox 2}} used to have a long-standing bug where only the initial part of the title text was shown as a tooltip. Firefox didn't show you the rest of the text unless you right-clicked show-property, and you would be able to see a sideways scrollable field of the title-text in the properties for the image. This bug was referenced in the title text of [[491: Twitter]] ("If long tooltips / cut off for you / then upgrade from / Firefox 2 / Burma Shave") and is still mentioned in [https://xkcd.com/about xkcd.com's About page]:

{{Quote|<big>'''Why can't I read the whole comic mouseover text in Firefox?'''</big>

''They can be read with extensions like [https://addons.mozilla.org/firefox/1715/ Long Titles], or by right-clicking on the images and going to 'properties', then clicking and dragging to read the whole thing. This is a bug in [https://bugzilla.mozilla.org/show_bug.cgi?id{{=}}45375 Firefox, Mozilla Bug #45375]. It has been outstanding for many years now.

''Note: It looks like it's been fixed in Firefox 3.0. Now, as an added tweak, to keep the tooltips from expiring while you're reading, you can use [https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/11233 this].|[[Randall Munroe]]|[https://xkcd.com/about About xkcd]}}

==Comics without a title text==
While most comics have one title text, some extra comics have [[:Category:No title text|no title text]]. In addition, [[404: Not Found]] lacks a title text due to delivering the standard {{w|Nginx}} "Page Not Found" message that does not even have any image to conceivably have an associated title text applied to it. [[1506: xkcloud]] is the first numbered comic other than [[404: Not Found]] to lack a title text, as certain interactive comics beyond number 1500 use a different format, removing the ability to add mouseover text. [[1525: Emojic 8 Ball]] and [[1608: Hoverboard]] also have no title text. Due to a bug in the JavaScript, in [[3227: Creation]], the title text disappears while on Stained Glass Mode. It is also impossible to access the title text when on that comic's Airplane Mode, because the comic flies too quickly.

==Comics with multiple title texts==
Sometimes a comic can have [[:Category:Multiple title texts|more than one title text]]. [[1193: Externalities]] was the first to have more than one title text, changing through the panels. [[1663: Garden]] also had multiple title texts. In addition to the main one (which said "Relax."), there are two different title texts for the two buttons, and one other one saying "null." In [[3074: Push Notifications]], in addition to the main title text (like in [[1663: Garden|1663]]), there is an extra one when you hover over the cat, reading ":3".

[[Category:Design of xkcd.com]]{{xkcdmeta}}

Title text

2026-06-15T16:56:23Z

FaviFake: Thanks!

<noinclude>{{xkcd.com}}[[File:xkcd_comic.png|thumb|right|250px|The [[Design of xkcd.com#Comic section|Comic section]] is one of the [[Design of xkcd.com|four main sections]] of the [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] website.]]{{TOC}}[[File:tt.png|right|thumb|The title text for [[2760: Paleontology Museum]]]]
{{incomplete|
*Explain that Randall previously ''erroneously'' called it "alt text" (like in [[45]]) and mouseover text, but he more recently calls it "title text", like in [[442]]. (Give a bit of history.) Add more comics/examples of Randall calling it "alt text", "mouseover text", and "title" text.

* Explain that in the book [[xkcd: volume 0]], comics sometimes include a different title text.

* Explain the use of title texts in the images of his ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' articles (explained [[what if? (blog)|here]]) and how the use changed from describing the image to adding jokes.}}
The '''title text''', also known as {{w|mouseover|mouseover text}} or {{w|tooltip}}, is an {{w|HTML attribute}} [[Randall Munroe|Randall]] puts on [[:Category:No title text|almost every xkcd comic]] to add something tangentially relevant to the topic of the comic. In some of the early comics, the title text was also used to comment on how they were drawn (see [[24: Godel, Escher, Kurt Halsey]]) and explain the joke (see [[5: Blown apart]]). In [[:Category:No title text|a few comics]], the title text is missing. The comic with the longest title text is [[1363: xkcd Phone]] (816 characters), while [[1311: 2014]] has the title text with the highest word count (134 words).

==How to access==
{{Quote|[T]o my knowledge none of the comics were ever missing a tooltip. It's all in a database (overbuilt, I know) and I think I would have noticed an empty field. More likely someone was just confused by their browser's erratic tooltip display behavior. Sometimes you have to do little incantations (or mouse over a link and then back onto the picture) to get them to appear.|[[Randall Munroe]]|{{w|Talk:Xkcd/Archive_1#All but one...|Source}}}}

Then title text can be accessed in many ways:
* By hovering the mouse pointer over the image on the main site;
* By clicking or tapping the "<sup>(alt-text)</sup>" button next to the comic title on the [https://m.xkcd.com mobile site];
* By viewing the [[Transcript|official transcript]] of the comics;
* By installing a [[Browser helpers|browser helper]];
* By opening the info.0.json file, for example [http://xkcd.com/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/info.0.json], [http://xkcd.com/485/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/485/info.0.json] or [http://xkcd.com/412/info.0.json http://xkcd.com/412/info.0.json]

==History==
Randall didn't add title texts to his comics before [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com], but most of the comics posted on [[LiveJournal]] had an original caption beneath the image, and many had comments by LiveJournal users. All the comics transferred to the new site had a title text, which was often along the same lines, but was almost never the same as the caption on LiveJournal. Learn more at [[LiveJournal]].

Randall uses the "title" attribute rather than the {{w|Alternative text for images|"alt" attribute}} in the HTML sources. In the [https://xkcd.com/rss.xml comics feed] and [https://xkcd.com/info.0.json API data] the "alt text" is labelled "alt". Randall has, at times, refer to "alt text", with one early comic example being the title text of [[45: Schrodinger]], though that can equally be read as refering to the accompanying "alt=" parameter given to the image, "Schrodinger", as far as the implied joke goes.

==Comics without a title text==
While most comics have one title text, some extra comics have [[:Category:No title text|no title text]]. In addition, [[404: Not Found]] lacks a title text due to delivering the standard {{w|Nginx}} "Page Not Found" message that does not even have any image to conceivably have an associated title text applied to it. [[1506: xkcloud]] is the first numbered comic other than [[404: Not Found]] to lack a title text, as certain interactive comics beyond number 1500 use a different format, removing the ability to add mouseover text. [[1525: Emojic 8 Ball]] and [[1608: Hoverboard]] also have no title text. Due to a bug in the JavaScript, in [[3227: Creation]], the title text disappears while on Stained Glass Mode. It is also impossible to access the title text when on that comic's Airplane Mode, because the comic flies too quickly.

==Comics with multiple title texts==
Sometimes a comic can have [[:Category:Multiple title texts|more than one title text]]. [[1193: Externalities]] was the first to have more than one title text, changing through the panels. [[1663: Garden]] also had multiple title texts. In addition to the main one (which said "Relax."), there are two different title texts for the two buttons, and one other one saying "null." In [[3074: Push Notifications]], in addition to the main title text (like in [[1663: Garden|1663]]), there is an extra one when you hover over the cat, reading ":3".

===Firefox bug===
{{w|Firefox 2}} used to have a long-standing bug where only the initial part of the title text was shown as a tooltip. Firefox didn't show you the rest of the text unless you right-clicked show-property, and you would be able to see a sideways scrollable field of the title-text in the properties for the image. This bug was referenced in the title text of [[491: Twitter]] ("If long tooltips / cut off for you / then upgrade from / Firefox 2 / Burma Shave") and is still mentioned in [https://xkcd.com/about xkcd.com's About page]:

{{Quote|<big>'''Why can't I read the whole comic mouseover text in Firefox?'''</big>

''They can be read with extensions like [https://addons.mozilla.org/firefox/1715/ Long Titles], or by right-clicking on the images and going to 'properties', then clicking and dragging to read the whole thing. This is a bug in [https://bugzilla.mozilla.org/show_bug.cgi?id{{=}}45375 Firefox, Mozilla Bug #45375]. It has been outstanding for many years now.

''Note: It looks like it's been fixed in Firefox 3.0. Now, as an added tweak, to keep the tooltips from expiring while you're reading, you can use [https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/11233 this].|[[Randall Munroe]]|[https://xkcd.com/about About xkcd]}}

[[Category:Design of xkcd.com]]{{xkcdmeta}}

Category:Home Inspections

2026-06-15T16:54:23Z

FaviFake: done

At the beginning of 2025 [[Randall]] made a comic, [[3037: Radon]], where [[Ponytail]] inspects [[Cueball|Cueball's]] house and finds problems with it, using a small handheld device. The problems, however, relates to the planet the house is build on, and not the building itself. Two months later the same happens again in [[3059: Water Damage]], completely the same setting. In the beginning of 2026, [[3192: Planetary Alignment]] continued the series. Most recently in June 2026 Randall continued the series with [[3258: Plate Flip]]. Only time will tell if this will be an ongoing series, or stop with just those four. But given that the settings and the device and the joke is along the same lines, it is likely that these four comics constitute a series. This would be the first new [[:Category:Comic series|series]] since [[:Category:Cursed Connectors|Cursed Connectors]] which began in 2021, and the first where the two comics follow each other like an actual series since [[:Category:Alien Visitors|Alien Visitors]] which came out a bit earlier in 2021. Shortly after this series was started another comic, [[3070: Orogeny]], followed with a similar look on geology as part of house buying. Although that comic is reminiscent of the other two, there is no home to inspect, thus it cannot be part of this series. The comic [[3051: Hardwood]] is also playing with these ideas, but that one is without Ponytail.

[[Category:Comic series]]

Comic series

2026-06-15T16:53:53Z

FaviFake: /* Unsolved Problems */ new series

<noinclude>{{TOC}}
:''For a list of the comic series, see [[:Category:Comic series]].''
:''Not to be confused with [[:Category:Comics sharing name|comic sharing name]].

</noinclude>The xkcd strips that are part of a [[Comic series|comic series]] are directly related to each other, rather than simply sharing a [[:Category:Comics by topic|recurring topic]]. A main series must be composed of at least three comics, while [[:Category:Miniseries|miniseries]] only need two to qualify; once they get their third comic, they graduate to a main series.

Comic series are intentionally created by [[Randall]] as part of a series. This is usually inferred from sequential numbers in the titles (such as in [[:Category:Stargazing|Stargazing]]), similar patterns in the comics' titles ([[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phones]]) or captions ([[:Category:Cursed Connectors|Cursed Connectors]]), release dates purposefully deviating from the normal schedule ([[:Category:Journal|Journal]]), a partnership with other artists ([[:Category:Guest Week|Guest Week]]) or companies ([[:Category:A Smarter Planet|A Smarter Planet]]), or Randall simply posting a list of all the comics that are part of a series ([[:Category:The Boy and his Barrel|The Boy and his Barrel]]).

Many of the early comic series have been released as five consecutively released comics, with each episode being released on a weekday, deviating from the standard release schedule. After 2010, no series followed a similar release schedule, as they all followed the normal schedule of three comics a week.<noinclude>

==Main series==
This is a chronological list of all the main series created by Randall. This list is sorted based on the release date of the third comic in the series.

=== [[:Category:The Boy and his Barrel|The Boy and his Barrel]] ===

: {{:Category:The Boy and his Barrel}}

=== [[:Category:Red Spiders|Red Spiders]] ===

: {{:Category:Red Spiders}}

=== [[:Category:Opening dialogue by Scott|Opening dialogue by Scott]] ===

: {{:Category:Opening dialogue by Scott}}

=== [[:Category:Parody Week|Parody Week]] ===

: {{:Category:Parody Week}}

=== [[:Category:Choices|Choices]] ===

: {{:Category:Choices}}

=== [[:Category:1337|1337]] ===

: {{:Category:1337}}

=== [[:Category:Journal|Journal]] ===

: {{:Category:Journal}}

=== [[:Category:Secretary|Secretary]] ===

: {{:Category:Secretary}}

=== [[:Category:A Smarter Planet|A Smarter Planet]] ===

: {{:Category:A Smarter Planet}}

=== [[:Category:The Race|The Race]] ===

: {{:Category:The Race}}

=== [[:Category:Five-Minute Comics|Five-Minute Comics]] ===

: {{:Category:Five-Minute Comics}}

=== [[:Category:Guest Week|Guest Week]] ===

: {{:Category:Guest Week}}

=== [[:Category:xkcd Phones|xkcd Phones]] ===

: {{:Category:xkcd Phones}}

=== [[:Category:Choices|Choices]] ===

: {{:Category:Choices}}

=== [[:Category:Substitution|Substitution]] ===

: {{:Category:Substitution}}

=== [[:Category:Code Quality|Code Quality]] ===

: {{:Category:Code Quality}}

=== [[:Category:Bad Map Projections|Bad Map Projections]] ===

: {{:Category:Bad Map Projections}}

=== [[:Category:X Years|X Years]] ===

: {{:Category:X Years}}

=== [[:Category:Stargazing|Stargazing]] ===

: {{:Category:Stargazing}}

=== [[:Category:1/Xth Scale World|1/Xth Scale World]] ===

: {{:Category:1/Xth Scale World}}

=== [[:Category:Cursed Connectors|Cursed Connectors]] ===

: {{:Category:Cursed Connectors}}

=== [[:Category:Unsolved Problems|Unsolved Problems]] ===

: {{:Category:Unsolved Problems}}

=== [[:Category:Home Inspections|Home Inspections]] ===

: {{:Category:Home Inspections}}

==Miniseries==
This is a chronological list of all the miniseries created by Randall. This list is sorted based on the release date of the second comic in the series.

=== [[:Category:The Uncomfortable Truths Well|The Uncomfortable Truths Well]] ===

: {{:Category:The Uncomfortable Truths Well}}
=== [[:Category:Android Partner|Android Partner]] ===

:{{:Category:Android Partner}}
=== [[:Category:Online Communities|Online Communities]] ===

: {{:Category:Online Communities}}
=== [[:Category:Etymology-Man|Etymology-Man]] ===

:{{:Category:Etymology-Man}}
=== [[:Category:Exoplanet Names|Exoplanet Names]] ===

:{{:Category:Exoplanet Names}}
=== [[:Category:Synonym Movies|Synonym Movies]] ===

:{{Category:Synonym Movies}}
=== [[:Category:Time-Traveling Sphere|Time-Traveling Sphere]] ===

: {{:Category:Time-Traveling Sphere}}
=== [[:Category:ISS Solar Transit|ISS Solar Transit]] ===

: {{:Category:ISS Solar Transit}}
=== [[:Category:Horror Movies|Horror Movies]] ===

: {{:Category:Horror Movies}}
=== [[:Category:Coronavirus Genome|Coronavirus Genome]] ===

: {{:Category:Coronavirus Genome}}
=== [[:Category:Old Days|Old Days]] ===

: {{:Category:Old Days}}
=== [[:Category:Hamster Ball|Hamster Ball]] ===

: {{:Category:Hamster Ball}}
=== [[:Category:Alien Visitors|Alien Visitors]] ===

: {{:Category:Alien Visitors}}

3192: Planetary Alignment

2026-06-15T16:52:26Z

FaviFake: /* Explanation */ From the [[explain xkcd:Editor FAQ#citation|Editor FAQ § [Citation needed]:]] "This template should only be placed when there is a deeper sense of humor and should not be overused."

{{comic
| number = 3192
| date = January 9, 2026
| title = Planetary Alignment
| image = planetary_alignment_2x.png
| imagesize = 740x327px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = We're going to need to modify the surface to mount it on the test stand. Which ocean basin do you like the least?
}}

==Explanation==
This is the third in a [[:Category:Home Inspections|series of comics]] about [[Ponytail]] inspecting Earth as if it were the client [[Cueball]]'s house.

[[Ponytail]] (presumably a planetary mechanic, which is not a real thing) appears to have been inspecting a planet, which seems to be the Earth, as if it were a vehicle. She is informing [[Cueball]] of the results, as if he were the owner of the planet.

According to her, the planet needs to be re-aligned, as the {{w|Earth's magnetic field|magnetic}} and {{w|Earth's rotation|rotational}} axes of the planet are 400 miles (640 km) offset from each other. She claims that this could create a number of problems with the planet, such as unbalanced magnetic fields. This is presented in the same casual manner as a car mechanic might regarding {{w|wheel alignment}}, or perhaps even the {{w|tire balance}}. Earth's magnetic alignment does change (both {{w|Geomagnetic pole#Movement|gradually drifting}} and {{w|Geomagnetic reversal|relatively sudden reversals}}), but not for any reasons that can be compared to typical vehicle maintenance issues.

Ponytail mentions radiation anomalies over the South Atlantic ocean. This is a real phenomenon, known as the {{w|South Atlantic Anomaly}}, where satellites experience increased malfunctions because solar radiation is higher than average, due to the alignment of the magnetic field, as well as {{w|Large low-shear-velocity provinces|a massive rock structure underneath Africa}}.

In the final panel, Ponytail says that they will provide a loaner planet while Earth is in the shop. This is typically done with vehicles, not planets, but perhaps this particular shop has a [https://www.clivebanks.co.uk/THHGTTG/THHGTTGradio3.htm very large back room]. Ponytail then asks if a gas giant is okay, as they are out of solid surface planets. This is likely alluding to the practice of car dealerships offering replacements or loaner vehicles that are very different from those brought in for service, which can greatly frustrate and inconvenience the customer.

The title text continues the mechanic metaphor, stating that they (the shop) will have to modify Earth to fit it on the test stand, asking Cueball which ocean basin he likes the least, implying that they intend to remove or alter one of the Earth's oceans to mount it for adjustment and retesting.

This is the second comic in recent history with the word "Alignment" in the title, with [[3177: Chessboard Alignment]] being the first.

==Transcript==
:[Ponytail is approaching from off-screen, holding a clipboard and some sort of handheld apparatus. She is talking to Cueball, standing to the right.]
:Ponytail: The inspection revealed a few problems.
:Ponytail: Looks like your planet needs an alignment.
:Cueball: Oh?

:[Close up of Ponytail.]
:Ponytail: Yeah, your magnetic axis is 400 miles off-center from your rotational one.
:Cueball (off-panel): Is that bad?

:[The view zooms back out, showing Ponytail holding her equipment, with Cueball holding a hand to his face, as if thinking.]
:Ponytail: The unbalanced magnetic field could cause radiation anomalies over the South Atlantic. Have you noticed any spacecraft equipment failures in that area?
:Cueball: There '''''have''''' been a few, actually.

:[The final panel shows the same as the third, apart from Cueball's gestures.]
:Ponytail: We can give you a loaner while yours is in the shop. Is a gas giant OK?
:Cueball: I'd '''''really''''' prefer a solid surface.
:Ponytail: Sorry, it's all we have. But it'll just be for a few days.

{{comic discussion}}
<noinclude>

[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Geology]]
[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Space]]
[[Category:Home Inspections]]

Category:Home Inspections

2026-06-15T16:50:22Z

FaviFake: removed Category:Series; added Category:Comic series using HotCat

At the beginning of 2025 [[Randall]] made a comic, [[3037: Radon]], where [[Ponytail]] inspects [[Cueball|Cueball's]] house and finds problems with it, using a small handheld device. The problems, however, relates to the planet the house is build on, and not the building itself. Two months later the same happens again in [[3059: Water Damage]], completely the same setting. In the beginning of 2026, [[3192: Planetary Alignment]] continued the series. Most recently in June 2026 Randall continued the series with [[3258: Plate Flip]]. Only time will tell if this will be an ongoing series, or stop with just those four. But given that the settings and the device and the joke is along the same lines, it is likely that these four comics constitute a series.

This would be the first new [[:Category:Comic series|series]] since [[:Category:Cursed Connectors|Cursed Connectors]] which began in 2021, and the first where the two comics follow each other like an actual series since [[:Category:Alien Visitors|Alien Visitors]] which came out a bit earlier in 2021. Shortly after this series was started another comic, [[3070: Orogeny]], followed with a similar look on geology as part of house buying. Although that comic is reminiscent of the other two, there is no home to inspect, thus it cannot be part of this series. The comic [[3051: Hardwood]] is also playing with these ideas, but that one is without Ponytail.

However, if Randall continues this kind of comic, then maybe there should be another category for the entire portfolio of such comics. In that case, this series will be a sub category of the larger series series, since the already existing inspection comics are arguably a connected series in their own right.

[[Category:Comic series]]

Category:Home Inspections

2026-06-15T16:50:11Z

FaviFake: now a series

At the beginning of 2025 [[Randall]] made a comic, [[3037: Radon]], where [[Ponytail]] inspects [[Cueball|Cueball's]] house and finds problems with it, using a small handheld device. The problems, however, relates to the planet the house is build on, and not the building itself. Two months later the same happens again in [[3059: Water Damage]], completely the same setting. In the beginning of 2026, [[3192: Planetary Alignment]] continued the series. Most recently in June 2026 Randall continued the series with [[3258: Plate Flip]]. Only time will tell if this will be an ongoing series, or stop with just those four. But given that the settings and the device and the joke is along the same lines, it is likely that these four comics constitute a series.

This would be the first new [[:Category:Comic series|series]] since [[:Category:Cursed Connectors|Cursed Connectors]] which began in 2021, and the first where the two comics follow each other like an actual series since [[:Category:Alien Visitors|Alien Visitors]] which came out a bit earlier in 2021. Shortly after this series was started another comic, [[3070: Orogeny]], followed with a similar look on geology as part of house buying. Although that comic is reminiscent of the other two, there is no home to inspect, thus it cannot be part of this series. The comic [[3051: Hardwood]] is also playing with these ideas, but that one is without Ponytail.

However, if Randall continues this kind of comic, then maybe there should be another category for the entire portfolio of such comics. In that case, this series will be a sub category of the larger series series, since the already existing inspection comics are arguably a connected series in their own right.

[[Category:Series]]

413: New Pet

2026-06-15T16:49:37Z

{{comic
| number = 413
| date = April 21, 2008
| title = New Pet
| image = new pet.png
| titletext = ONE LAPTOP PER HAMSTER!
}}

==Explanation==
[[Megan]] and [[Cueball]] create a new pet by putting an {{w|Eee PC}} into a {{w|hamster ball}}, allowing it to roll around. They teach it various commands, and it appears to learn and make friends, despite neither Eee PCs nor {{w|Roombas}} - the 'friend' in question, having feelings. Pleased with their creation, Megan then expresses disapointment it cannot be given a soul. However, Cueball instead uses made-up Python command 'import soul' to give it one. {{w|Python (programming language)|Python}} is a programming language popular among geeks running Linux. Among other features, it has a large number of easily installed 3rd-party libraries that make it easy to add features (stored in ''modules'') to programs - though a 'soul' module is not one of them! This section is a reference to [[353: Python]], in which Cueball is able to fly by importing the (''then'' fictional) <code>antigravity</code> module.

The {{w|Asus Eee PC}} was one of the first subnotebook computers available on the American market, noted for its small size and coming pre-installed with Linux. With a diagonal size of 11 inches, it would take a big hamster ball to carry it like this.

{{w|Omniwheel}}s are wheels with rollers mounted on the edge to allow the wheel to slide sideways. The wheels in the drawing look more like {{w|Mecanum wheel}}s, which have rollers mounted at an angle to the edge. Both omniwheels and Mecanum wheels are used in omni-directional drive systems, like you would use to drive a hamster ball from the inside. A {{w|webcam}} is connected magnetically to the top of the hamster ball, which connects to an rf link to transmit wirelessly to the computer.

TCO is {{w|total cost of ownership}}, which is exactly what it sounds like: the purchase price of something, plus all costs of keeping, operating, and/or maintaining that something. It's used in accounting to determine something's true cost-to-value evaluation. In the case of a cat, TCO would primarily consist of food, litter, veterinary care, etc. Refer to [[#Trivia|trivia for more details]]. For the device in the comic, there would be a small ongoing cost (occasional recharges for the batteries) after the initial investment.

{{w|Python (programming language)|Python}} is a programming language popular among geeks running Linux. Among other features, it has a large number of easily installed 3rd-party libraries that make it easy to add features (stored in ''modules'') to programs. In this case, [[Cueball]] is importing the (fictional) <code>soul</code> module to give the new pet a soul. This is a reference to [[353: Python]], in which Cueball is able to fly by importing the (''then'' fictional) <code>antigravity</code> module.

The title text refers to the {{w|One Laptop per Child}} project spearheaded by Nicholas Negroponte around 2005, with the goal of building an inexpensive, durable sublaptop that could be distributed to children in developing countries to give them an educational edge.

==Transcript==
:[Megan is placing EEE PC inside hamster ball. Cueball scratches his head.]
:Cueball: What are you doing?
:Megan: Mounting your EEE PC in a hamster ball.

:Megan: Well, the TCO of a cat is like $1,000/year, so we're saving money.

:[Cueball is typing.]
:Megan: Microcontrollers are all wired up! How's the brain coming?
:Cueball: I've taught it obstacle avoidance and blogging.

:Cueball: Aww, look, it's making friends with the Roomba.
:EEE PC: ''RRRRR''
:Roomba: ''Beep!''

:[A blueprint in the background shows a webcam, RF links, bearings, omni wheels, magnets, EEE PC, omni wheels, and a battery all hooked up to Megan and Cueball's "pet."]

:[Hamster ball bounces down a flight of stairs.]
:Hamster ball: ''Bonk bonk''
:Off-panel: Man, I hope it's okay that we're laughing at this.

:[Megan picks up a ball.]
:Megan: I think my mothering instinct took a wrong turn somewhere.
:Cueball: You mean an <u>awesome</u> turn.

:[Cueball is typing.]
:Megan: Too bad we can't give it a soul.
:Cueball: Sure we can.
:Cueball types: import soul
:Megan: Oh, right. Python.

==Trivia==
*According to [http://www.peteducation.com/article.cfm?c=1+2137&aid=1542 Pet Education's list], the TCO for a cat is between 310 and 1169 USD per year.
*In January 2020, Samsung named the pet{{Citation needed}} [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7N5UDZX7TQ "Ballie"] ([https://web.archive.org/web/20200107091102/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7N5UDZX7TQ WayBack archive]), while Python support has not been confirmed yet.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics with inverted brightness]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Hamster balls]]
[[Category:Programming]]
[[Category:Robots]]
[[Category:Roomba]]

3227: Creation

2026-06-15T16:48:52Z

FaviFake: Undo revision 414467 by YZ100 (talk) I see neither of these. If the sky is black and the comic is black is because the sky is black

{{comic
| number = 3227
| date = April 1, 2026
| title = Creation
| image = creation_2x.png
| imagesize = 567x198px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = This xkcd.com update introduces a variety of new reading modes which can be activated through the menu.
}}
{{series
| series = April
| number = 18
| date = April 1, 2026
| days_late =
| day_category = Wednesday
| prev_title = 3074: Push Notifications
| prev_date = April 9, 2025
| next_title =
| next_date =
}}
To experience the interactivity of the web page, visit the {{xkcd|3227|original comic}}!

==Explanation==
In this {{w|April Fool's Day}} comic, several new viewing modes have been added to the xkcd website, accessible through a {{w|drop-down list}} beneath the comic (not visible on Explain xkcd). This was the first time in 15 years that the xkcd site itself had been redesigned, with the previous site redesign coming in 2011 with [[880: Headache]]. This allows various different viewing experiences for the entire website (this included other comics until 15 April 2026; since then it only works on this comic). Some are "normal" viewing modes, like the typical "light" and "dark" modes, but others take such things further and/or in more esoteric ways. This includes an "airplane mode" (see below) that parodies and subverts the {{w|Airplane mode|normal implementation}}.

The accompanying comic references one of the first lines of the {{w|Bible}} (Genesis 1:3), wherein God creates light. Here, though, before God has a chance to fully appreciate their work, a person on Earth immediately requests an implementation of {{w|dark mode}}. Dark mode is a feature on many websites and devices which displays text in white against a black background instead of the default black text on a white background. In low ambient light this makes for a less intense viewing experience that is easier on the eyes, so many people who spend a lot of time looking at screens prefer dark mode (whereas casual users often find light mode easier to read). On OLED screens, another benefit is that less battery life is consumed because of the primarily low brightness of the screen, which makes it useful for those who want to be energy-efficient or extend their battery life.

This demand represents a common experience for web and app designers, who spend a lot of time creating something that looks beautiful to them, and in their particular use case, only to find when it is put out into the wild that it doesn't suit the needs of many of their actual users, who don't particularly care about the effort they've put in.

Dark mode is not usually implemented on planets,{{cn}} although one could argue that night-time is effectively Earth's "dark mode", which could have been created by God as a response to the person. (That seems likely, in fact, given that the very next words in Genesis 1:4 are "and he separated the light from the darkness".) The comic deviates somewhat from traditional Judeo-Christian theology, as in Genesis the day/night cycle was created on the first day, but humans were created on the sixth day - thus, the "dark mode" (night-time) would already have been implemented by the time humans existed. Possibly the person is actually requesting a dark mode that can be toggled at will, rather than one which occurs automatically each day.

Unlike most comics, the title text contains no jokes, but rather explains the update and gives basic instructions.

The comic credits the "Excellent Design Team", consisting of Amber, Benjamin Staffin, and Kevin who helped create the modes.

This credit was also implemented as the new [[Header text]], so that the explanation for the new mode would be visible when viewing all other comics on xkcd, as well as the credit to the design team, see more details [[Header_text#2026-04-07_-_Reading_Modes|here]].

When the comic first released the veiwing modes were available on every comic, but currently the settings are only available on the original comic.

===List of Modes===
If you want to check out other xckd pages with the feature, dump the following into the console:
await import("https://xkcd.com/3227/5710add.js");
// fake an event
const event = new CustomEvent("DOMContentLoaded", {});
document.dispatchEvent(event);
Or, you could grab the [https://greasyfork.org/en/scripts/574120-xkcd-mode-switcher-from-3233 xkcd Mode Switcher] Greasy Fork script

; Light Mode
: The usual site experience. Typically, where sites have light and dark modes, light is the default option, so as to mimic ink on paper (such as printed {{w|newspaper comic strip}}s).

; Lighter Mode
: The entire web page is filtered to look {{w|Exposure (photography)#Overexposure and underexposure|overexposed}}, making colors wash out and reducing the contrast.

; Dark Mode
: A standard "white content on black background" dark mode. Specifically, Dark Mode inverts the colors of the page (which makes a {{w|Negative (photography)|colour-negative}} and then hue-rotates it by 180 degrees (to make hue return to normal, only brightness-reversed. (For example, see comic [[556: Alternative Energy Revolution|556]], with dark mode enabled, to see how the hue is maintained.) The background of the page, normally light blue, becomes a dark blue; (near-)whites become (near-)blacks, and vice-versa, only mid-tones staying the same. This inversion makes the content of this particular comic, with the original transition from a dark pane to "let there be light" panes and the subsequent request for this very feature, particularly nonsensical, as it seems to start fully bright, then darken as God creates light.

; Darkest Mode
: Everything on the webpage turns completely black (severely 'underexposed', in effect, the opposite to "Lighter mode" but also even more extreme). The exception is the drop-down menu widget, which may appear as merely a dark gray — and depending upon the browser itself, the dropped-down menu may be its 'natural' appearance when it becomes fully active — which is of course extremely helpful for navigating back out of this mode or onward onto others.

; Blurry Mode
: {{w|Blur (photographic effect)|Blurs}} the entire webpage. This is not conventionally desirable as it makes it harder to read text and interpret visuals. Whereas light and dark mode support can improve {{w|Web accessibility|accessibility}} for certain vision conditions, this mode makes already poor vision even worse.

; Grayscale Mode
: Applies a standard {{w|grayscale}}/{{w|Colorfulness#Saturation|desaturation}} conversion filter to the entire webpage. Many devices provide a grayscale mode as one of their color filter settings, which can simulate different {{w|color vision deficiencies}}. Grayscale specifically can also help improve focus by preventing colors from catching the eye and making distractions less visually appealing.

; Greyscale Mode
: Operates identically to Grayscale Mode, but also changes the spelling of "math" in the slogan at the top of the page to "maths" (to go along with the respective {{w|American and British English spelling differences|British English}} use of ''{{wiktionary|gray}}/{{wiktionary|grey}}'').

; Dorian Greyscale Mode
: Makes the webpage slowly turn grey, including darkening/fading-to-grey 'white' areas. This refers to ''{{w|The Picture of Dorian Gray}}'', in which the titular character has a portrait that slowly ages and fades out while the character stays young and handsome. The transformation finishes after 5 minutes.

: Of note is that the surname of the titular character is "{{w|Grey (disambiguation)#People|Gray}}" (as is still common, if not dominant, in Britain), but the mode itself is named for the primary British/non-American standard English version of the word for such a hueless shade.

: No relation to the {{w|Dorian mode}}, a musical scale.

; Space Opera Mode
: Turns the entire page into a ''{{w|Star Wars}}''-style opening scroll, which loops round until you change the mode. Scrolling the mouse scrolls up or down through the page content. {{w|Space opera}} is a genre of sci-fi that ''Star Wars'' falls under. Opera is the name of a web browser, though it does not usually display content in this way.

; 3D Mode
: Makes the comic render in {{w|Anaglyph 3D|anaglyphic stereoscopy}}. [[Randall]] has used 3D space before for [[848|another joke comic]]. He has also utilized a similar joke for the 2011 xkcd redesign, which was released along with [[880: Headache]].

; Origami Mode
: Rotates and folds various pieces of the webpage, as if it were {{w|origami}}-folded.

; Ink Mode
: Recolors the webpage as if drawn in blue ink, which is often used for the initial roughing-out of a drawing.

; Spring Mode
: Gives the comic a simple physics simulation, making it slightly rotate around an axis when the page is scrolled, and giving it a {{w|springboard}} look, hence the name. The axis around which the page precesses is perpendicular to the axis the user scrolls on. This means that when the page is scrolled vertically (the usual direction), the comic wobbles around a horizontal axis, but when scrolled horizontally (if your screen size or zoom allows it), the comic precesses about the vertical axis.

; Antipodes Mode
: Turns the entire webpage upside down. An {{w|antipodes|antipode}} is the point on the Earth's surface directly opposite of another, but "The Antipodes" is also a term used to refer to {{w|Australia}} and {{w|New Zealand}} by inhabitants of the northern hemisphere. Note: When the comic was first published this was labeled "Southern Hemisphere Mode".

; Hacker Mode
: Recolors the entire webpage in the stereotypical green-on-black coding environment color scheme often used by {{w|hacker}}s in film and TV. This visual shorthand is a holdover from early {{w|monochrome monitor}}s that used P1 phosphor. (Modern terminal software has no such limitations, and many programmers today use {{w|syntax highlighting}} to color-code operators and keywords.)

; Screensaver Mode
: Makes the comic float around on the webpage, bouncing as it hits the edges. A common type of {{w|screensaver}} has some text or other element drifting around the screen in this way. Many people ended up watching such screensavers, waiting for the bouncing graphic to hit the corner of the screen. Like with Hacker Mode, there is an element of nostalgia to this; screensavers are less necessary on modern LCD screens, so fewer setups use them.

; Modem Mode
: Slowly reveals the comic from top to bottom, as if slowly loading (but [[598: Porn|only in approximation]]) the way images often used to have to be progressively rendered from a low-rate stream of image data in the days of more limited dial-up connections and also a lower-performance {{w|internet backbone}} in general. This is accompanied by audio of the sound of a {{w|modem}} communicating over such a connection. NB - this mode does not appear to function correctly/reliably for some viewers.

; Stained Glass Mode
: Fills each closed area of the comic with a separate color to mimic the look of {{w|stained glass}} imagery. The colors vary each time this mode is selected or the page is reloaded in this mode, which works by flooding a single pseudorandom hue over all areas of near-white, each flood bounded only by any sufficiently dark or saturated drawn line/border. Strangely enough, on this mode you can't see the title text. This is because the canvas used to apply the hues is functionally covering the image: the javascript used to do this should have been made to copy the comic image's title attribute and make it apply to the overlaid canvas for the benefit of the browser.

; Airplane Mode
: Makes the comic fly around on the page, with the {{w|onomatopoeia}} "NYOOM!" written next to it, as if it were an {{w|airplane}}. This is unlike the usual use of {{w|airplane mode}} to refer to disabling the cellphone (or all {{w|radio frequency}}) features of a mobile device, as required on most flights. Of course, the website's "Airplane Mode" does no such thing, and would be pointless to enable on an airplane.{{cn}}

; Boat Mode
: Makes the entire webpage tilt back and forth, emulating the way a boat rolls on the water. While [[165: Turn Signals|extremely unlikely]], this could theoretically counteract the rocking motion of a boat, stabilizing the page content. In practice, it is unlikely to help with {{w|seasickness}}. (As of 2024, some smart devices started offering a "vehicle motion cues" feature that is meant to reduce motion sickness, although it is designed for road vehicles rather than watercraft.)

: This mode is a reference to the longstanding mention of a Boat Mode in the [[footnote]], which says "Remove your device from Airplane Mode and set it to Boat Mode".

==Transcript==
:[Black background with white caption boxes.]
:Caption: And God said,
:Caption:"Let there be light,"

:[A bright explosion of light from a star in the center, with a white caption box.]
:Caption: And there was light.

:[The star with bright rays of light is shown against the horizon of a planet.]
:[The same planet horizon is shown with a clear sky above.]
:Caption: God saw that the light was-
:Voice from the planet: Can you add support for dark mode?

<noinclude>{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Interactive comics]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:April Fools' Day comics]]
[[Category:Religion]]
[[Category:Comics with custom header texts]]
</noinclude>

826: Guest Week: Zach Weiner (SMBC)

2026-06-15T16:45:40Z

FaviFake:

{{comic
| number = 826
| date = November 26, 2010
| title = Guest Week: Zach Weiner (SMBC)
| image = guest week zach weiner smbc.png
| titletext = Guest comic by Zach Weiner of Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal. When I was stressed out, Zach gave me a talk that was really encouraging and somehow involved nanobots.
}}
{{TOC}}To experience the interactivity of this comic, visit the {{xkcd|826|original comic}}.

==Explanation==
This comic is drawn by a guest webcomic artist, Zach Weiner (now Weinersmith), following the theme of "Guest Week". Zach is the author of the webcomic [http://www.smbc-comics.com/ Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal]. The [http://www.xkcd.com/826/ original comic] is interactive. It will show images of the exhibits (see below) by clicking on them.

The entire comic is a hypothetical "{{w|Smithsonian Museum}} of Dad-Trolling, an entire building dedicated to deceiving children, represented here as [[Kidball|Kidballs]], for amusement." It is a common occurrence that curious children will ask simple questions about science to their parents, such as, "Daddy, why is the sky blue?" and a parent could respond, "Well Susie, the sky is blue to match your dress."

''Guest Week'' was a series of five comics written by five other comic authors. They were released over five consecutive days (Monday-Friday); not over the usual Monday/Wednesday/Friday schedule.<br>
The five comics are:
*[[822: Guest Week: Jeph Jacques (Questionable Content)]]
*[[823: Guest Week: David Troupes (Buttercup Festival)]]
*[[824: Guest Week: Bill Amend (FoxTrot)]]
*[[825: Guest Week: Jeffrey Rowland (Overcompensating)]]
*[[826: Guest Week: Zach Weiner (SMBC)]]

===Hall of Misunderstood Science===
Each exhibit is a display set up to reinforce the false, sarcastic, or exaggerated answers to typical questions that children may ask their parents about scientific topics. The answers given involve just enough information that the child may be satisfied with the answer and repeat it to others while maintaining the irony for adults that the answers are obviously misleading or false. These explanations may be given because the parent does not know how to explain the topic.

<gallery widths=432px heights=285px>
File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_27.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that basilisks exist, and that they live under your bed. The {{w|basilisk}} is a mythological reptilian monster that was described as having the ability to kill other living things with its gaze. This story might be believed by children because children often imagine that a monster or a dangerous creature is hiding under the bed at night, and verifying that the basilisk is under the bed and might kill the child would likely terrify the child.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_26.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that "In my day" molecules did not exist, and everything was just atoms. Molecules are chains of atoms, and therefore more complex than atoms. This story might be believed by children because old people often tell unbelievable and questionably credible "In my day" stories about how different, or in this case less complicated, things when they where younger. This story may sound no less credible than these stories to a child. Like most "In my day" stories there is at least a grain of truth. The word atom has changed its meaning over time; at one time all discovered molecules were called {{w|atomism|atoms}}, as when they were modified their properties change. Also, according to the {{w|Big Bang}} theory, there was a period billions of years ago when the universe contained no molecules, yet still contained atoms.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_25.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that magnets are only attracted to each other when they are teenagers. This is an inside joke that the child is not in on about how there is a loss of sexual desire in adults. This story might be believed because magnets are seen as mysterious and possibly magical by children.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_24.png|In this exhibit the plaque on the statue of Jesus claims that {{w|snow}} is composed of Jesus' {{w|dandruff}}. This story might be believed because some children take the expression that {{w|rain}} is "God's tears", and this would be a logical extension.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_20.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that the reason that there are only four components of {{w|DNA}} is because there where only four letters back then. The following letters describe the {{w|nucleotides}} that make up DNA chains: "G" {{w|guanine}}, "A" {{w|adenine}}, "T" {{w|thymine}}, and "C" {{w|cytosine}}. This story might be believed by children as DNA can be thought as an instruction set to build life. Instructions contain words, and therefore the letters G, A, T, and C can be thought of as the letters that the words in the instructions are made from.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_23.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that you are more vulnerable to the {{w|Bogeyman|boogie man}} when you are sleeping. "The Boogie Man" is a common legend used to scare young kids; he typically hides in closets and underneath beds, and attacks sleeping children. This story might be believed by children as some believe in the boogie man.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_22.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that water increases its size to frighten {{w|predator|predators}}. {{w|Ice}} is less dense than liquid {{w|water}}. This is an unusual property as most materials are more dense in solid form. This might be believed by a child because many animals appear to increase their size to frighten away other threatening animals. A {{w|rhinoceros}}, although not traditionally a predator, would be a predator of water.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_21.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that {{w|antimatter|anti-matter}} is composed of half {{w|ant}} and half matter. The prefix ''{{Wiktionary|anti-}}'' means "the opposite of", but also can sound like ''ant-y''. The suffix ''{{Wiktionary|-y}}'' would make ''anty'' a neologism meaning "having the quality of or involving ants". Children might believe that matter involving ants could in fact be composed of both ants and matter. Antimatter is also referenced in [[683: Science Montage]], [[1621: Fixion]] and [[1731: Wrong]] as well as being the subject of the ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' ''{{what if|114|Antimatter}}''. It was also mentioned in another ''what if?'': ''{{what if|79|Lake Tea}}''.
</gallery>

===Regrettable Pranks: An Interactive Experience===
This section holds falsehoods that a dad might use to frighten his children. Fear is often used to discourage children from disobeying their parents. It is an interactive experience, so visitors can try something for themselves, then learn the frightening fact it indicates.

<gallery widths=432px heights=285px>
File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_19.png|In this exhibit the sign claims that helium makes your voice higher because you are about to explode. Helium makes your voice high-pitched, because sound travels faster in helium than in air (79% nitrogen and 21% oxygen), and it does not explode because it is a noble gas; although it could rupture containers in accordance with the {{w|combined gas law}}, which governs the relationship between pressure, temperature and volume: i.e. if a balloon is over-inflated or exposed to heat, it will burst. This story might be used by parents to discourage children from inhaling helium. This story might regrettably convince a child that they are dying after they inhale helium. On the other hand, it can be dangerous to inhale helium from a gas container if the pressure is too high. So maybe better scared than dead.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_18.png|In this exhibit the sign claims that if your middle finger is longer than all the others, you are an alien half-breed. For almost all people the middle finger is longer than all the others. This story might be used by parents to tease their children. This story might regrettably convince a child that one of their parents is an alien, and therefore not to be trusted. Another possibility is that everyone is an alien half-breed, and therefore, their progeny are also alien half-breeds.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_16.png|In this exhibit the sign claims that one of the cups of {{w|Jell-O|Jello}} had a rabbit brain instead of a cherry. Cherries are a common ingredient in gelatin based deserts. One cup is missing and in the hands of the child, possibly eaten. This story might be used by parents to tease their children, or discourage them from eating more dessert. This story might regrettably convince a child that they ate the brain of a small cute fluffy animal.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_17.png|In this exhibit the sign claims that monsters will eat you if you do not make your bed. In some stories monsters specifically prey on children. This story might be used by parents to encourage children to make their beds. It also might regrettably convince a child that there are monsters under their beds and frighten them so they can not sleep.
</gallery>

===Concessions===
This area holds concession stands, which sell food. There are misleading names on each stand. The pop-outs in this section are based on jokes parents tell their children to frighten them about food.

<gallery widths=432px heights=285px>
File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_15.png|In this exhibit the marquee announces the name of the concession stand as KFP. The parent claims that the "P" stands for phoenix, and the operator adds "also ponies". KFP is a parody of Kentucky Fried Chicken ({{w|KFC}}), a popular fast food chain which specializes in fried chicken. A phoenix is a mythical bird that throws it self into a fire and later rises from the ashes. This story might be believed by children because phoenixes are birds and a fried one may look similar to a chicken.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_14.png|In this exhibit the marquee announces that the concession stand sells {{w|ground beef}} and further explains that ground beef is beef that is found on the ground. The word "ground" here refers to the floor or dirt, but can also be the past tense of the word "grind". This story might be believed by children because the words are spelled and pronounced the same.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_13.png|In this exhibit the marquee announces that the concession stand sells {{w|ice cream}} and claims that ice cream is really spelled eyes cream, and always composed of eyeballs. This story might be believed by children because the words "eyes cream" sounds similar to "ice cream".
</gallery>

===Conservatory of Poorly Remembered History===
Each exhibit is a display set up to reinforce the false, sarcastic, or exaggerated answers to typical questions that children may ask their parents about history. The answers given involve just enough information that the child may be satisfied with the answer and repeat it to others while maintaining the irony for adults that the answers are obviously misleading or false. These explanations may be given because the parent does not know how to explain the topic.

<gallery widths=432px heights=285px>
File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_11.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that {{w|Genghis Khan}} achieved his victories by using dragons. Genghis Khan was a Mongolian conqueror who conquered almost all of Asia and much of Europe founding the {{w|Mongol Empire}}, and creating the largest continuous land empire in history. This story might be believed by children because some children associate magical and other fantastic elements with the past instead of fantasy.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_12.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that the {{w|Crimean War}} was a war on crime. The Crimean War is an often forgotten Eastern European conflict between Russia and a European coalition (including France, which the comic also pretends doesn't exist) with aims to stop Russia's expansion. This story might be believed by children because adding an "a" to a people group sometimes is used to create a country name, making Crimea sounds similar to a nation of criminals. Also worth noting is that the criminal depicted in the mural appears to be the {{w|Hamburglar}}, a McDonald's mascot.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_10.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that wizards were in control during {{w|The Renaissance}}. The Renaissance is a cultural movement in Europe that took place after the Dark Ages. This story might be believed by children because some children associate magical and other fantastic elements with the past instead of fantasy.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_3.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that {{w|Star Wars}} is actual history. Star Wars is a fantastical science fiction movie. This story might be believed by children because the movie begins "a long time ago in a galaxy far away", and some children associate magical and other fantastic elements with the past instead of fantasy. The "veteran" presented here appears to be wearing a fake beard as part of his costume.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_9.png|In this exhibit the poster claims that {{w|France}} does not exist. The adult in the comic continues to attempt to convince the children that France does not exist. This is supposed to be funny because the knowledge of France as a country is common. This may be parodying the global warming debate, a common theme in both XKCD and SMBC. It may also be a reference to the {{w|Bielefeld Conspiracy}}.
</gallery>

===Rotunda of Uncomfortable Topics===
Each exhibit is a display set up to explain uncomfortable topics that children may ask their parents about. The answers given so that the children do not ask further questions.

<gallery widths=432px heights=285px>
File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_8.png|In this exhibit the sign on the box covering up a couple in bed claims that naked wrestling is perfectly normal, but kids should never engage in it. "Naked wrestling" is a euphemism for sex. A parent may give this explanation if a child walks in on their parents having sex and they have to come up with an explanation on the spot, or they feel that the children are too young to know about sex.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_7.png|In this exhibit the sign over the stand claims your parents drink alcohol to prevent you from drinking it as alcohol is a poison. This is technically true, as alcohol is a toxin. A parent may give this explanation to a child who asks their parents why they drink alcohol if it is bad for you, and did not want to explain the pleasurable experience of alcohol because it might encourage children to drink.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_5.png|In this exhibit the banner claims that mommies have big tummies because storks like chubby girls. According to some childhood stories storks deliver babies. Also, there are men who prefer heavy women; these men are often called chubby chasers. A parent may give this explanation to a child who asks why, if a stork delivers babies, their mother is changing while she is pregnant, and the parent continues to try to avoid the topic of sex.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_6.png|In this exhibit the sign claims that grandma did not die, but is going back to Saturn. The choice of Saturn as grandma's destination is appropriate because the god Saturn was associated with aging, as in "Saturn, the Bringer of Old Age" from ''{{w|The Planets}}''. Some parents tell their children that their loved ones have gone away instead of telling them the truth, that their loved ones are dead. Going to Saturn "for revenge" is added for comic value. A parent may give this explanation to avoid causing their child pain.
</gallery>

===Miscellaneous===
<gallery widths=432px heights=285px>
File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_4.png|In this exhibit the marquee claims that {{w|dinosaur|dinosaurs}} are made of bones only. The fossil record includes the imprints of the other tissues of dinosaurs including skin, nails, teeth, and feathers. This story might be believed by children because the majority of all displays of dinosaurs in museums only include bones.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_2.png|The restrooms have 3 doors. Clicking reveals that there the two standard gendered restrooms found in the majority of public buildings, and another one for "Korgmen & Spangs" which does not correspond to any known human trait. This could be a reference to the Marvel alien species {{w|Korg_(comics)|the Korg}}.

File:guest_comic_week_zach_weiner_smbc_1.png|In this exhibit the sign (which the children can not see) explains that the "{{w|Magic Eye}} poster" contains no hidden images. Magic Eye is a company that sells {{w|autostereogram}}s in books. Autostereograms contain a "hidden" three-dimensional image that can only be seen by converging one's eyes towards a point other than upon the poster itself. This takes time and many people find it difficult or impossible to do.
</gallery>

==Transcript==
:In the spirit of xkcd I present a proposal for a new Smithsonian museum:
:The Smithsonian Museum Of Dad-Trolling
:An entire building dedicated to deceiving children for amusement

:(Click to view exhibits!)

:The top left room is 'The Hall of Misunderstood Science'. It contains six exhibits.

:Exhibit: A giant basilisk looms over children.
:Exhibit label: BASILISKS: Real, deadly, under your bed.

:Exhibit: Four magnets hang from a square arch. A child is touching two of them together.
:Text on the arch: Magnets only leap at each other when they're teenagers. Later, they lose interest.

:Exhibit: A child on his dad's shoulders looks up at a looming statue of Jesus behind a lectern. There are flakes falling from Jesus onto them both.
:Exhibit label: Snow is Jesus' dandruff. His scalp gets dry when it's cold.

:Exhibit: A child lies asleep, while hands and a scary face reach up around the bed toward him.
:Exhibit label: Sleep: Now you're vulnerable to the boogie man!

:Exhibit: An ice block sits on a stand in front of pictures of a wolf and rhinoceros looking frightened.
:Exhibit label: Freezing water: Expands to frighten predators.

:Exhibit: An insect on a stick is orbited by a small sphere.
:Exhibit label: Anti-matter: Matter that is more than 50% ants.

:Exhibit: A DNA strand with the letters T, A, C, and G hanging around it.
:Exhibit label: DNA only has four letters because the alphabet was smaller back then.
:Dad, to child: Told you so.

:Exhibit: A bunch of molecules hang from the ceiling.
:Exhibit label: Molecules? In my day, we only had atoms!

:The top right room is 'Regrettable Pranks: An Interactive Experience'. There are four exhibits.

:Exhibit: Five balloons float tethered to a table. A child is holding a sixth balloon. The Dad looks alarmed.
:Sign on exhibit: If this helium makes your voice go higher, it's because you're ten seconds from exploding.

:Exhibit: An alien face is shown above an outline of several hands next to a ruler. A child holds his hand up to it.
:Sign on exhibit: Measure your middle finger. If it's longer than the others, you're an alien halfbreed.

:Exhibit: Three cups are on a table. A child is walking away with a fourth cup, the dad's arm around the child's shoulder.
:Exhibit label: Has anyone seen my rabbit brain? It looks like a cherry, and I dropped it in a Jello cup.

:Exhibit: A monstrous set of jaws open upward around a bed.
:Sign on exhibit: Make your bed or monsters will know a kid lives there.

:The center right room is 'Concessions'. There are three booths.

:Booth: A concession stand is labeled 'KFP', and displays a KFC-style bucket. A dad and child are eating.
:Dad: The "P" is for "phoenix".

:Booth: A concession stand.
:Sign on stand: Ground beef: Beef we found on the ground.
:Dad, to child: Told you.

:Booth: A stand shaped like a giant eye.
:Booth label: EYES CREAM
:Subtitle: How did you think it was spelled?
:Sign on booth: Now with more of the goo in your eyes. Same as every other creamery.

:The lower left room is 'Conservatory of Poorly Remembered History'. There are five exhibits.

:Exhibit: A man is riding a dragon.
:Exhibit label: Genghis Khan: victory through dragons.

:Exhibit: A criminal in front of some windows.
:Exhibit label: The Crimean War: The first war against crime.

:Exhibit: A castle with flags hanging on it.
:Exhibit label: The Renaissance
:Subtitle: Long story short, the wizards were in control.

:Exhibit:A man in Jedi-style robes with a fake beard.
:Exhibit label: Star Wars is a documentary. No, seriously.
:Dad, to children: Kids, this man is a veteran.

:The lower right room is 'Rotunda of Uncomfortable Topics'. There are five exhibits.

:Exhibit: A wrestling ring, with a man and woman mostly obscured by the exhibit label.
:Exhibit label: Naked wrestling: perfectly normal. NEVER DO IT.

:Exhibit: a figure sits at a booth in front of a bowl of food. The dad is holding a bottle.
:Exhibit label: Alcohol is poison. I drink to save you from it.
:Dad: You're welcome.

:Exhibit: A large bird.
:Exhibit label: Mommies get big tummies before babies come because the stork likes chubby girls.

:Exhibit: A rocket ship.
:Sign on exhibit: Grandma's not dead. She just returned to Saturn. For REVENGE.

:In the areas outside the rooms, there are two more exhibits and restrooms, all clickable.

:Exhibit: A dinosaur skeleton.
:Exhibit label: That's right. Dinosaurs were made entirely of BONES.
:Dad, to kid: If you think about it, it makes sense.

:Exhibit: A large image hangs on the wall. It is a dense squiggly jumble of lines.
:Dad, to kids: You gotta squint juuust right.
:Sign on exhibit: Magic eye trick that doesn't actually work.

:Restrooms: There are three doors, each with a sign.
:First door (male logo): Men & Boys
:Second door (female logo): Women & Girls
:Third door (unrecognizable logo): Korgmen & Spangs

==Trivia==
*This is the first [[xkcd]] comic to be dynamic and/or interactive.
*When viewing this comic on [[xk3d]], the interactive features of this comic are disabled, possibly due to the 3D feature, or maybe because Randall only uploaded the main image to xk3d.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cory Doctorow]]
[[Category:Comics featuring real people]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Ferrets]]
[[Category:Guest Week]]
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[[Category:Dinosaurs]]
[[Category:LOTR]]
[[Category:Religion]]
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[[Category:Star Wars]]
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[[Category:Comics with custom header texts]]

1435: Presidential Alert

2026-06-15T16:44:48Z

FaviFake: From the [[explain xkcd:Editor FAQ#citation|Editor FAQ § [Citation needed]:]] "This template should only be placed when there is a deeper sense of humor and should not be overused."

{{comic
| number = 1435
| date = October 17, 2014
| title = Presidential Alert
| image = presidential_alert.png
| titletext = When putting his kids to bed, after saying 'Goodnight', Obama has to stop himself from saying 'God bless you, and God bless the United States of America.'
}}
[[File:Eas_new.svg|thumb|150px|Current EAS logo]]
==Explanation==
The {{w|Emergency Alert System}} allows the U.S. President to address the country in the event of a national emergency, by broadcasting a message over all television and radio channels. Despite systems like this having existed for over 60 years, no president has ever used it, even during major incidents like the {{w|September 11 attacks}}. In this comic, the US President accidentally activates the system by pressing a button, apparently located on the {{w|Resolute Desk|''Resolute'' Desk}} in the {{w|Oval Office}}. Surprised by being on television, he tries to think of something important to say on the spot, but cannot think of anything other than a piece of generic dental-hygiene advice – a rather non-urgent message.

The concept of the President mistakenly hitting an important button has long been a source for jokes, often somewhat morbidly involving the {{w|nuclear football}}.

The title text references the typical conclusion to presidential speeches: "Goodnight, God bless you, and God bless the United States of America," or some variation thereof. As "goodnight" is the typical conclusion to a day, the title text jokes that {{w|Barack Obama|President Obama}}, out of habit, has a hard time stopping at goodnight when saying that to his children. It might also be implying that the president that sent the message might actually be Barack Obama.

==Transcript==
:[Television beeping.]
:Screen reads: "E.A.S Incoming Presidential Alert"

:[President of the United States of America in his office is on the television.]
:My fellow Americans. I, uhhh. Wow.

:Frankly, I didn't realize what this button did. I was just... I mean...
:I appear before you tonight to, um.

:Look, uhh...
:Remember to floss regularly. Oral hygiene is important. Thank you.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring children]]

User talk:FaviFake

2026-06-07T08:31:14Z

FaviFake: /* Template */

[[#jumpb|''(jump to bottom)'']]
<big><big><big><big>Hey there, feel free to '''[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=User_talk:FaviFake&action=edit&section=new send me a message]''' :)</big></big></big><div style="float:right;margin-left:10px;margin-bottom:10px;">__TOC__</div></big>

== Objects table ==
Thanks for replying. The current table in the main text looks good, but still it is a ''description'' or just ''enumeration'' of game objects, not an ''explanation'' (or in some cases: partly an explanation). Supposing we keep the current structure, it is possible to add explanations for the planet names in the '''Explanation''' column. For example, first sentence of the second paragraph is a good ''explanation'' for the Uzumaki planet's name. On the other hand, Andal has only a ''description'' (what it looks like and what features are present on the surface) and no ''explanation'' (that it refers to Animorphs series of books). There's also a question where one should put explanations of items and messages. Some do not need an explanation ('You found a stick'), but most do: what they mean and what they refer to, both in xkcd context (such as when there's a comic about the thing) and in general context. I hope you understand the difference between ''description'' and ''explanation''. Maybe there's also some misunderstanding resulting from a language barrier; English is not my native language.

What is also missing in the table are many structures or objects found on the planets and, most importantly, dialogues or monologous of the characters, which contain many puns and references, and also hints for the player. There's simply no place for them in the current structure. Making more columns may be messsy. That's why I proposed making several tables covering different aspects.

Please take my remarks as proposals to improve the structure and not as a criticism or request for you to make everything right and fill every cell of the table. I think we need to create a clear structure for everyone else to fill in with details; but also to provide good examples to follow.

Technical remarks:
* In my opinion, the filename column is not needed, it does not appear anywhere while playing, it's in source code only. Better remove it to have more horizontal space for the rest. The names given to the planets by the editors of the explanation page shown in the Description column are fine.
* Coordinates are also not useful for a regular player, who does not use some Javascript addition/cheats, maybe remove it as well; textual directions in '''Explanation''' column are sufficient.

-- [[User:Malgond|Malgond]] ([[User talk:Malgond|talk]]) 19:59, 2 May 2023 (UTC)
:> Thanks for replying. The current table in the main text looks good, but still it is a ''description'' or just ''enumeration'' of game objects, not an ''explanation'' (or in some cases: partly an explanation). Supposing we keep the current structure, it is possible to add explanations for the planet names in the '''Explanation''' column. For example, first sentence of the second paragraph is a good ''explanation'' for the Uzumaki planet's name. On the other hand, Andal has only a ''description'' (what it looks like and what features are present on the surface) and no ''explanation'' (that it refers to Animorphs series of books).
:Hey! Yeah, that's the state of the table ''right now'', and I 100% percent agree with everything you're saying here. All planets and items that need an explanation should be explained and not just described. I mostly just copied and pasted the "planet description/explanations" from the old list to the table: creating the table was way more painful than i thought. I was actually surprized to see that nobody explained what Andal referred to, but I don't know anything about it so more knowledgeable people will have to chip in on that

:>There's also a question where one should put explanations of items and messages. Some do not need an explanation ('You found a stick'), but most do: what they mean and what they refer to, both in xkcd context (such as when there's a comic about the thing) and in general context. I hope you understand the difference between ''description'' and ''explanation''.
:I do! And I wish other people could help here. I'm not sure if you've seen it, but this is the banner i put above the table:
----
'''ALL ITEM EXPLANATIONS NEED TO BE TRANSFERRED FROM THE OLD PLANET LIST TO THE NEW TABLE'''<br>
We are currently switching from a disorganized list (below, inside the green banner) to the new organized table, but the explanations for specific items are missing from the new table. Please help by copying the item explanations from the old list and adding them to the new table ''<u>in this format</u>:''<br>
<code>The item message &ndash; <nowiki>''Where to find it &ndash; Explanation, such as references etc''</nowiki></code><br>
Example: You found a cheese platter (Your tanks recharge faster) – ''Next to the cell tower – The cheese is a reference to [https://example.com 1234: Cheese]''
----
'''OTHER ISSUES:'''
* upgrades that end in "???" need to be replaced by the exact upgrade message shown to the user.
* the "Tiles (X, Y)" column for planet coordinates is empty

:As you can see, the explanations should be put right next to the items and messages. Unfortunately no one has started to add them to the table yet

:> Maybe there's also some misunderstanding resulting from a language barrier; English is not my native language.
:Your English is excellent :)

:> dialogues or monologous of the characters, which contain many puns and references, and also hints for the player. There's simply no place for them in the current structure. Making more columns may be messsy. That's why I proposed making several tables covering different aspects.
Almost all the dialogues are on the [[2765: Escape Speed/Transcript]] page, so I guess they should be added there. I don't know if they're already here, I haven't looked at it enough
:: The transcript is not the place for explanations. Puns and references shall be explained elsewhere. I continue working on the transcript but there's still quite a way to go. -- [[User:Malgond|Malgond]] ([[User talk:Malgond|talk]]) 5 May 2023

:> Please take my remarks as proposals to improve the structure and not as a criticism or request for you to make everything right and fill every cell of the table. I think we need to create a clear structure for everyone else to fill in with details; but also to provide good examples to follow.
:Yeah; i totally get everything you said. In my last reply I think I was a bit too rude for some reason, maybe it's because I just finished the table and was tired.

:>* In my opinion, the filename column is not needed, it does not appear anywhere while playing, it's in source code only. Better remove it to have more horizontal space for the rest. The names given to the planets by the editors of the explanation page shown in the Description column are fine.
:* Coordinates are also not useful for a regular player, who does not use some Javascript addition/cheats, maybe remove it as well; textual directions in '''Explanation''' column are sufficient.
I was heavily inspired by the table in the [[2712: Gravity]] explanation, which included these. I kind of agree that the filename could be removed, and the filenames could be added to the planet name or explanation, i didn't think about that. About the tiles, someone might use them someday, but if the column keeps remaining empty, i don't mind seeing it disappear

:I really liked your ideas, if you don't mind I'll copy and paste this discussion in the actual comic discussion page and see what others think --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:37, 2 May 2023 (UTC)

::Update: I found a way and added all the coordinates, and moved the planet filenames to the Planet Name column to make more space for the other columns :)

::: Hi, what about dividing planets and objects like in [[User:Malgond/Drafts/Escape_Speed|my experiment]]? There's plenty of horizontal space for explanations and the entries are quite compact vertically. I also think about color-coding the different Types of game objects. -- [[User:Malgond|Malgond]] ([[User talk:Malgond|talk]]) 5 May 2023

::::Hmm, I think it looks a little messy and maybe too complicated. Do any other comics have two different tables? Also, I'm personally not a fan of mixing items, landscapes, and people. I think most people reading the table are there to get an overview of the planets and what they contain. Do we really have to explain everything in such detail? [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:09, 6 May 2023 (UTC)

:::::We do not have to follow other explanations too closely, we could use a new form if it seems clearer and better. The current form has no place neither for explaining items nor for dialogues/monologues. More columns could be problematic (specifically in today's world of high and narrow screens of smartphones). Should we explain everything? Well, it us up to collective "us". Personally, I would like someone explain a few puns/dialogues I do not understand.
:::::For now, there's only a handful of people still interested in somehow finishing the explanation for this huge comic. Maybe if we two can agree on some format we could put it in discussion page and ask for votes. (Discussion needs a cleanup, BTW). -- [[User:Malgond|Malgond]] ([[User talk:Malgond|talk]]) 22:00, 7 May 2023 (UTC)

:::::Hey, I'm back. I see you're enhancing your example table, and iI was wondering, do you plan to move your edits to the actual article after you're done and use the test to see how the formatting looks? Isn't it easier to just add them to the main page directly? Just wondering. If you want I can help you port them over :)
:::::Keeping the contents of the table on your talk page and then porting them over afterwards could lead to a loss of information added after you started editing your user page [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 13:11, 13 May 2023 (UTC)

::::::I'm back too. Yes, I intend to put it in the main article, but I am a bit shy to replace a lot of your work; I've asked for opinions in the talk page. Let's see how it sorts out. Maybe someone has a still better idea. -- [[User:Malgond|Malgond]] ([[User talk:Malgond|talk]]) 21:50, 13 May 2023 (UTC)

::::::Oh. I think the structure of the current table in the article is better than the one you've been working on: for example, it's easier to sort for items, is more compact, and is just one. Why don't you just add a "transcript" column like the table on [[2712: Gravity]] to put what things and people say, and add the rest of the information on the respective columns? Personally, I think you're making it a little bit too complicated. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:26, 14 May 2023 (UTC)

== Haltones ==

"They're not **predominantly** gray, the two main colors are just white and black. Sometimes he uses the gray color just like when he uses any other color" ... It didn't say that they were predominantly grey(/'gray'), any more than it said that they'd be predominently black (as [[:Category:Comics with inverted brightness]], often, in preference to white). The point being that even the most "black and white" images aren't monochrome, but have degrees of grey at the boundaries, with smoothly antialiased boundaries between the full black of the line (or filled area) and the full white of the background (or inverted detail). You'll see this if you zoom in, with your favourite image editor. And very often in images with a default RGB colourspace, even if the effective pallette employed covers just greyscale values. But greys actually do feature a lot, too (often the first choice of non-black-and-white, for slight lessening of prominence, as opposed to 'red pen' ''increased'' visibility). So it's technically inaccurate to describe them as pretty much monochrome. But how to convey this in <...counts...> less than 157ish words? [[Special:Contributions/172.71.242.173|172.71.242.173]] 16:35, 17 May 2023 (UTC)
:The wiki page says
::::"xkcd comics are usually plain, predominantly black-and-white line drawings, but sometimes they make use of hues beyond the usual monochrome colors, even if it is just red-penned annotations.
:I think it's enough, since, even if grey is more used than other non-monochrome colors, I don't believe it's so important that it needs to be included as a "third" main color. If Randall uses many bright colors, that he will obviously also use simpler hues of grey when needed. What do you think? [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:51, 17 May 2023 (UTC)
:Aside from the antialising edging gradient, I just used the Random Page link and landed on [[1301: File Extensions|something with functional greys]], [[734: Outbreak|an unusual use of 'Post-It' yellow]], an unremarkably "just black pen" comic and then [[1788: Barge|more functional grey]]. I'd argue against "monochrome" as a description, as clearly there is more than just #000000 and #FFFFFF, often enough, in an actual fill-colour/broad-brush context. Even if that's #808080 or another no-hue shade. (I was expecting to land on a "grey pen" comic to assess, after enough clicks but, having seen what I got in the random first handful, I saw no need to go on.)
:And "monochrome" can be/often is coloured. Sepia photographs or "night vision" green displays are perfect examples of monochrome (with or without halftones/dithering/whatever). As is [[267: Choices: Part 4]] (other Choices comics may be considered "duotone", in different ways).
:Maybe "...are often drawn as black shapes on white, or occasionally white shapes on a dark background, but may feature at least one additional highlighting shade or an even fuller colour pallette." Does that sufficiently cover that whole breadth of use? [[Special:Contributions/172.70.86.154|172.70.86.154]] 19:48, 17 May 2023 (UTC)

== Childish slang. ==

Agree with you on the recent change that you (generic 'you', not ''you'' 'you'!) sound infantile, any which way, upon use of the words mentioned. Which is how it was still said before the revert in that version of edit. But with <code>"pretty gay" and "retarded" are infantile and offensive slang for "foolish" or "contemptible"</code>, you miss the point. Foolishness is just one distant contender for what "pretty gay" is often intended to mean (even if not actually being used for someone/something 'effeminate'). And "retarded" is more in the whole "thick, stupid, dumb" line of insult than "contemptible" (which is more "horrible, dislikable, repulsive"..?).
<br />Personally, I also thought it better with not actually defining insults (correctly or otherwise), as it adds power to them. I can call someone a "numpty" in jest, for example, and colloquially that might be understood as the low-level insult (if that) which it is intended to be. But if I start to bandy around its {{wiktionary|numpty#Scots|dictionary definition}} then it becomes more of a seriously accusatory description.
<br />Just my opinion. Not really understanding the latest revert when it had seemed to be improved (if anything) in the version you reverted away. Just putting it there. I know you're doing a lot of editing (good stuff!) just wondering if you considered this one carefully enough in your obvious zeal. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.182.89|172.71.182.89]] 16:31, 28 May 2023 (UTC)
:Addendum. Meant to say, if you decide to undo/reform your own revert (I won't do it, but on the offchance you see my point), I'd have not said "''commonly'' used". They're used in slang, but I don't think we can say how frequently they pop up. They're "used in slang" (and also not in slang, or at least not insulting slang, where "gay" has a long history of just meaning "happy", whilst "retarded" is often to do with decceleration/minimised acceleration of physical systems) but I'm not sure they're no more than minority words in the whole world of such language. They depict a subset of insult-givers (like the character in the comic, for whom it adds a certain additional characterisation) amongst all the many and varied insult-givers, and Randall surely chose such semi-bowlderised terms to not have to write any of all the far worse words he might also have done. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.94.31|172.71.94.31]] 16:46, 28 May 2023 (UTC)

== IP page to delete ==

I didn't see your thinking about why the Deletion category was not needed there. And, believe me as an IP myself, I've never known anything useful being said on an IP's User or User Talk page. With that example not breaking the pattern any. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.131|172.70.85.131]] 00:41, 22 June 2023 (UTC)
:I just don't think there's a reason to delete it, it's useful to have a previous talk page if the IP continues to edit and people want to communicate with them [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:51, 30 June 2023 (UTC)
::"The IP" is whichever one of 'us' happens to land on that particular Cloudflare route.
::I'm not going to go back and find out which IP it represents, to check if it's in their current stock of connected gateways, but it might not be. Or it was even (depending on date) a pre-Cloudflare 'straight' access unproxied and thus no longer seen, even if the exact same editor on the exact same IP lucked on ''their'' initial gateway.
::Certainly it won't map to a meaningful 'user', chances may even be that it doesn't map to ''any'' user. IP-version User/User Talk pages are anachronisms pretty much as soon as they're created. Or before, if based upon trying to contact an author of an older edit. I was on 172.70.85.131, above, but who knows (before I submit it) what this reply's sign-off will say.
::And a one-shot editor may never ever see the results of any conversation that was tried to be started. Whereas I ''might'' see any response, anywhere, that contextually makes it plain that they're talking about an edit I once made.
::Honestly, I think it'd be worthwhile checking ''every'' IP-focussed namespace page and archiving anything truly interesting that found itself in there in some other central location then condemning them all to deletion. Maybe, if possible, prevent their creation too. But I don't have the ability to do anything (except sift through them for any of the very rare gems of quality, but I wouldn't be able to do anything about it from there on in, so...
::...not gonna do anything more about it (I can't, other than reinstate the To Be Deleted membership, whch I won't bother with), but I hope you understand my perspective on this. I've seen you become a very useful member of the community, who I generally respect for your input and tweaks to the site, and don't expect you to take instruction from li'l ol' me (not even working with an established identity). Just consider this as food for thought, and leave it at that if you wish. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.34.19|162.158.34.19]] 20:12, 30 June 2023 (UTC)

== RTL/LTR: "...but I think it refers to me" ==

Yeah, it does. The point being that we might not do anything about the smartarses who vandalise knowingly (and I don't see a problem with what you otherwise did), but when someone thinks ''they'' have unique and funny joke (along the lines of putting "Citation needed"s ''everywhere'') they might spot the comment and then realise how we've seen it all done before so refrain from the prank. I can't even recall how many times we have had to revert things, but best to put off the casual comedian, and it won't change the outcome either way for the dedicated vandal with their blood up and looking to cause trouble. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.107|141.101.98.107]] 20:00, 29 June 2023 (UTC)
:I guess you're right, I just thought it was very clear for everyone that rendering an entire article unreadable was an act of pure vandalism, but I guess an editor comment doesn't hurt. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:53, 30 June 2023 (UTC)

== The reason "the image size wasn't there"? ==

...because it didn't need an image-size restriction, originally? Compare the [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/File:Miss_lenhart.png previous and current version sizes]. Nice to have a (''huge!'') high-res headshot, no doubt, but clearly that's why you found that it now needs artificially constraining... No actual mystery. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.63|172.70.85.63]] 17:16, 5 July 2023 (UTC)

:Yeah you're right, I just assumed every comic had the image size to be future-proof. The weird thing was that the "imagesize: " part was already there, but there was no value. Anyway, nothing important.

== I disagree with Oxford commas. ==

"For breakfast I had some bread, toast, and jam." - A legitimate(ish) case of ", and ". Or "I created the world, and saw that it was good." I otherwise prefer to suscribe to replacing all non-final conjunctions in sequence with commas but ''not'' adding one before the ultimate (remaining) conjunction. That's like having "Fish, and chips", where it isn't an actual afterthought. And best to rephrase or repunctuate (e.g. with super-listing semicolons to separate) if you have confusing comma-breakout clauses that ''so'' easily clash (or lead you down funny garden paths) with Oxford Commas. My opinion, but this is why syntax is clearer when leaving out OCs. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.93|172.70.85.93]] 13:59, 6 July 2023 (UTC)
:I just think it's better to use it everywhere to avoid any possible confusion. If we used it half the time, it would be inconsistent. But it's no big deal.
::Similarly, no big deal. Except that it ''looked'' like an error. You've done a lot of useful changes, recently... A ''lot''... Which is not a bad thing, I must add. Occasionally I've seen what (I thought!) you intended to say, and I've helped out with a misplaced word or two. And I honestly do not feel like OCs read correctly in many circumstances. How would you even OC something like "...you should paint it red, yellow or, maybe, orange"?
::The comma already does a lot of heavy lifting, four or five different uses can occur in the same sentence, with it commonly doing duty as a sub-clause parenthetical (except without the clear open/close distinction of an actual parenthetical) ''as well as'' conjunction-replacement within a list. You will find many instances of non-OCed lists on the site. In fact I find the "Please note that all contributions to explain xkcd..." bit, below this edit box, to be the exception and not the rule.
::Anyhoo... I 'corrected' an example, but did not re'correct' it once you made it obvious what rule you were working to. I think you're less right than me, naturally, even if I wouldn't say that you're more wrong. ;) But I thought I'd make you a brief note of my thoughts rather than edit-warring the issue. Less brief, now, but I hope you still take it in good humour. (Oh, yeah, I'm sort of Ok with Oxford Spelling, insofar as it's mostly what I use naturally. Except for the "-ize" bit. That and their Comma are totally against how I was taught at school, a number of decades ago. :P ) [[Special:Contributions/172.71.242.71|172.71.242.71]] 15:26, 6 July 2023 (UTC)
:::You really seem to care about this a lot more than I do, if you want feel free to revert my edit back. I'm not even sure why we're here talking about commas lol
:::I'm no expert and I just like commas. Thanks for checking my edits, I think I've seen a few of your corrections. I have a lot of free time at the moment and I seem to like fixing up unorganized things here --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:42, 6 July 2023 (UTC)

== Science Girl/Hairbun ==

You may have noted that several of the Talk pages attached to those you changed already had discussions about whether someone was Hairbun or (a possibly grown-up version of) Science Girl, and you had people like Kynde support the change ''to'' treating her as Science Girl. No skin off my nose, but I'm not sure your arguments are strong enough to support your broad sweep changes in that regard. I think I'd side with "bun with trailing hair" being SG (regardless of apparent age/maturity, as the description only really says ''usually'' a child, whether you take that as prescriptivist or descriptivist) but not enough that I'd reverse your considerable efforts in this matter. But on the off-chance that you hadn't noticed the prior discussions and conclusions, before making your own assessment. FYI, only. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.178.204|172.71.178.204]] 14:01, 7 July 2023 (UTC)

:I will properly reply to you tomorrow since it's midnight here. Btw thanks for letting me know these hyperlinks were rendered correctly, and for fixing my 1 typo <s>(after i corrected 100)</s>
::Guys, some things may be being taken too seriously. Assuming [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1608:_Hoverboard&diff=prev&oldid=317396 this was the 'one error'], yeah, the Pedant's Curse hits us all, that's the point. Easy to see how it was done (read as "a Category:Interactive..." rather than "an interactive", or whatever). Happens to the best of us, when concentrating on loads of other things. Not sure about the Jill thing, at all, myself, but that discussion is probably for soewhere else. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.79.158|172.69.79.158]] 22:22, 7 July 2023 (UTC)

:::Nonononono I wasn't serious when I thanked you about the typo, I was also just kidding. I was joking about how after I corrected a ton of typos I added one more.
:::On the main topic you brought up: I think Jill's main characteristics (I'll talk about why I renamed her) are that she is a child, she is usually interested in science, and has always one or two buns with trailing hair. [[Hairbun]] isn't as defined as Jill: she just has a bun. This is what the page [[Hairbun]] (written entirely by Kynde, I haven't reformatted to remove the bullet points yet), say about the bun:
----
:::*Her appearance, apart from her glasses, can also change.
:::**In 703: Honor Societies, 708: Sex Dice, 1511: Spice Girl, 1601: Isolation and in every instance in 1608: Hoverboard her hair looks somewhat different, curly and with some kind of ponytail, but since '''her main distinguishing characteristic is the hair bun''', these comics are included.
:::[...]
:::*There are some characters with hair buns that are not Hairbun:
:::**Since she is a grown woman, she should not be confused with Jill or any other small girls with hair bun like in 1584: Moments of Inspiration.
----
:::And on the Page for Jill, before I ever touched it, it said:
:::*As she is usually also clearly a child she usually cannot be confused with Hairbun
----
:::Kynde mentioned [[1511: Spice Girl]] and [[1601: Isolation]] as featuring Hairbun and not Jill, but they look exactly like a grown-up Jill. Plus, on the gallery section on [[Hairbun]] (I'm working on adding back a better one since the old one was kinda broken UPDATE 11:13, 8 July 2023 (UTC): Added the gallery back with vector images), this was the first picture of Hairbun:
:::[[File:Hair Bun Girl with curly hair and ponytail.png]]

:::So, to recap: Hairbun has always had a version with a bun with trailing hair, but it was inconsistent between comics, so I settled on Jill is a girl that always has trailing hair and Hairbun is an adult that sometimes has trailing hair.

:::On the topic of renaming Jill:
:::*I searched the wiki for Jill and found 3 discussions. One of them ended up "why world we even create a page for that girl, there aren't many comics featuring her.", but didn't criticize the name too much iirc
:::*We did the same thing for [[Danish]]. The only time she was given ''any'' name ("Danish in the sense of "darling" iirc), that was the name used.
:::*If we change our minds and Jill also becomes a woman, we don't have to remove the "girl" part.
:::*I'm not sure about this, but I think she's slowing being added more and more outside science comics.

:::Wow this was long --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:20, 8 July 2023 (UTC)

== In reply to [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=2794:_Alphabet_Notes&curid=26437&diff=321127&oldid=320916 this query]... ==

There's {{w|Welsh orthography|the Welsh}}, at the very least! (Well, you did ask! Even if it's truly not so relevent. ;) ) [[Special:Contributions/172.70.86.159|172.70.86.159]] 11:29, 18 August 2023 (UTC)
:Lol. TIL! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:13, 18 August 2023 (UTC)

== Plural animals ==

Following on from Ferret->Ferrets, what about the last remaining singular that is Category:Apatosaurus? (I must admit, all your edits/re-edits are making my head spin, as worthy as they often are, but this seems like the next logical step that I thought you might have done to finish that particular neatening job.) But I'll leave it up to you as to whether it's Apatosauruses, Apatosaurii or whatever else you might consider most appropriate... ;) [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.98|172.70.85.98]] 10:15, 24 August 2023 (UTC)
:I actually thought about it, and I came to the conclusion that I don't know what the plural of that word is. Feel free to research if there's a "right" word and rename that category :)
:> (I must admit, all your edits/re-edits are making my head spin,
:Yeah I don't really organize everything I want to change beforehand, so whenever i notice a little thing is missing, I add it to every page that needs it. I guess it's easier to review my edits in bulk from a page's version history lol --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:53, 24 August 2023 (UTC)

== Community portal spam ==
The spammers seem to be deleting text from Community Portal. [[User:ConscriptGlossary|ConscriptGlossary]] ([[User talk:ConscriptGlossary|talk]]) 07:28, 3 November 2024 (UTC)
:Thanks, but I couldn't find any recent example concerning me. Do you mind giving an example? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 07:49, 3 November 2024 (UTC)

== Possible Adminship? ==

Hi FaviFake, I’m Victoria. I’m planning on reaching out to Jeff via Twitter/X because there’s a long list of things that only he can do. You can see the list at my [[User:42.book.addict#To_Do_List_for_Jeff|user page]]. One of these tasks is promoting more admins. Seeing as you are quite active, and have done quite a lot of edits (top 10 in CS score-wow!), would you like to be mentioned in my message as a possible admin candidate? [[User:42.book.addict|42.book.addict]] ([[User talk:42.book.addict|talk]]) 17:21, 3 November 2024 (UTC)
: Oh hey, thanks for messaging me! I started caring a lot for this site about a year ago, went on a complete pause for a few months, and came back this week. You seem very active, love to see some new active users! I saw your message on the community portal saying you were trying to find a way to contact Jeff. That's actually something I've thought about doing for a long time but never actually tried since not even Davidy22 was able to contact him at one point iirc.
:Anyway, yes, I'd love to be an admin for this site since there are so many things I can't do as a user (i have my own to-do list, which includes 1) actually deleting pages in Pages to delete and 2) improving/fixing the comic templates and Main page).
: So yeah, I wish you good luck contacting him! My only advice is to use any possible way to (or to get someone else to) contact him without worrying too much about annoying him. His last contribution was more than a year ago, he can totally jump back in for a moment after being unreachable for so long. I really like your message, it's very well-written, now the hard part is getting it to him. Asking Davidy22 for his email address (or finding it online) sounds like a great idea to me. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 22:12, 3 November 2024 (UTC)

== Trivia below transcript ==
The FAQ page says that trivia is below transcript. I'm very sorry about this. [[User:ConscriptGlossary|ConscriptGlossary]] ([[User talk:ConscriptGlossary|talk]]) 00:41, 4 November 2024 (UTC)
:Nono don't be sorry, you're totally right! I came back here after months of being offline and forgot about the order! I realised my mistake yesterday but didn't have the time to go look for the article to revert my edit. Please revert it if you get the chance to do it before me. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 04:53, 4 November 2024 (UTC)
::There, I should've fixed it now. I see you also reverted my edit, thanks! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 04:59, 4 November 2024 (UTC)

== On the Ghosts in the NavPane ==

When I saw 42's inclusion of Ghosts in the Character NavPane, I was pondering asking for Demons and Aliens (the blob-monster types, or near variations, from both UFO-ish comics and far-future) to be added alongside.

But I agree with you that they're not ''really'' minor characters. Yet I think they (all of them) deserve a slot there, as they are as much a feature as the (Animals/)Squirrels section. Originally thought to suggest "Groups" (could include "Multiple Cueballs" and even "Children" for groups with otherwise un-IDed child characters), which you could still ''also'' add (but for human-character groups only), but now thinking "Other Beings" could hold Ghosts, Demons and Aliens (maybe "Future Beings" separate from the latter, or at least the differently-futuristic "Floating Orbs" as ''another'' other classification category in there). As a section between Real People and Animals, I thought, unless it's decided best to put them after Animals.

Food for thought, anyway. You (and 42, and maybe others) may have your own ideas on this, and I wouldn't (and can't) spring my own ideas upon you by suddenly just editing the appropriate source. It probably needs discussion. I nearly put my earlier thoughts in the Community Portal area, but as you're personally active on this at the moment I thought it might be easier for you to ponder if I finally commited it to writing just here. (Feel free to move this contrib/advertise it wider, if you see fit.) [[Special:Contributions/172.70.91.62|172.70.91.62]] 14:19, 5 November 2024 (UTC)
:Just popping in to add my 2 cents-I wholeheartedly agree with the idea of having “other beings” in the navbox. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#db97bf">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#97b6db">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 16:02, 5 November 2024 (UTC)
::Hey there, thanks a lot for messaging me about this. I disagree with you for one specific reason: the navbox was initially supposed to catalogue the recurring characters in the comics which displayed more or less the same behaviours across comics, such as [[Black Hat]] and [[Beret Guy]]. It then expanded to include real people, such as politicians, which still remained the same characters across different comics. The animal section is different in that some of them are the same animals across comics (such as bobcats and red spiders, for example), but since we had to include them, we included EVERY animal, even when they were completely different every time, because it'd look weird if the only animals there were the specific ones i mentioned.
::If we included a section such as Other beings that includes ghosts, I believe it would be filled with characters that are not the same in every comic they appear in and the navbox would completely lose its intended purpose. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:13, 7 November 2024 (UTC)

== (Whoops, forgot a header!) ...FYC ==

If you agree with {{diff|356369|these additions/changes}}, with or without other adjustments, I was wondering if you'd like to do the respective changes to the Incomplete Article category page, as I find it's semi-protected and I'm thus locked out from the edits that I thought I might duplicate there too (in my IP state – yes, I know I could change this, but I'm happier just to leave it up to you/whoever). Anyway, for your consideration. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.202.75|162.158.202.75]] 17:09, 10 November 2024 (UTC)
: Done! Thanks. I removed a few technical details. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 07:24, 16 November 2024 (UTC)

==The [[What If? chapters|''What If?'' article index]] project==
''The messages regarding the [[What If? chapters|''What If?'' article index]] project have been moved to '''[[Talk:What If? chapters]]'''. To add a new topic regarding the index, [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:What_If?_chapters&action=edit&section=new click here].'' --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:15, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

== Removed "Discussion" super-header. ==

I had wondered, as (at that time) you hadn't bothered to remove any of the ''other'' equivalent super-headers. It looked a bit like an accidental select-and-cut, like sometimes editors do, given your actual edit was waaay down the other end of the page. (It was a bit too neat, not like the usual case of somehow snipping off just one of the "="s, make a =="header"== into a ="header="=, effectively, but I've also seen similarly unmessy accidents happen, so your decent tightening up of the whitespace could have just as easily been a part of the same misclicking.)

I did check the companion pages, and they were all happyily as they (once) were. Note that the extra level of header ''does'' have use for (e.g.) putting a similar level of header at the bottom to give Archive, FAQ, etc, sections (not part of the now-top-levelisted points), or even such that we can have "for <foo>, see <otherPortal#section>" to gather things up with less repeats. Not to have their own subheaders (unless they, too, get so large that we have to further split them!), but to be seperate-but-appended like a Transcript (and maybe Trivia) section, regardless of how subheadered an in-depth Explanation gets. If we ever get that (and, really, we could do with a ''lot'' of archival for most of the Community Pages, and maybe some FAQing, for which I ''might'' suggest a subheadering to easily scan for... e.g. ... the situation with the MathML that seems to get revisited more often than not), then we probably need the superheaders back, unless we put messy indented-bullet-trees (at the top? with or without "expand"-hiding?) ''only'' for non-discussion items.

Not that I totally agree that "1.<many...>" (and the occasional "1.<something>.<subsubitem>" was unreadable, either, but ''so long'' as we don't have a further main(ish) header, of equal import, then ''maybe'' it's ok to do it your way. Just it seemed like a big decision to make, to cut out all the (admitedly untaken) options out of the equation. ...And that is a summary of the mental arithmatic whizzing through my head when I had decided (on balance) that you'd probably just made an unknowing misedit that needed bringing back in line with the others. Just to explain the snap decision to undo your 'accident'. Not sure whether you'd been purposefully thinking about it for far longer, of course. Maybe even a couple of minutes! ;) [[Special:Contributions/172.71.178.58|172.71.178.58]] 14:53, 8 February 2025 (UTC)

:I totally agree with everything you said! One day I noticed there was a useless superheader at the top which was making the TOC unnecessarily slightly harder to scan through. We should definitely bring it back if someone decides to organise the portals, but I figured since it was untouched for more than a decade, it's likely it won't happen in the near future. There was no need to explain the reasoning behind your revert, but I appreciate you reaching out! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:06, 8 February 2025 (UTC)

==A simple Thank-you==
Thank you so much for expanding my knowledge of xkcd, the wiki, and wikis overall. That user page creation left a bit of a mark on me lol. I have found out that I have reached a high enough level to create user pages. I have created 2 user pages and 2 discussion pages for other worthy members of the community. Thank you for the very helpful advice, and thanks again for providing helpful information from the community. Sincerely, [[User:DollarStoreBa'al|DollarStoreBa'al]] ([[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al|talk]]) 05:14, 27 February 2025 (UTC)
:No worries! I'm glad we have another active contributor <3   --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:09, 27 February 2025 (UTC)
::It's relevant to note that we only create User pages when people explicitly ask for them. On the other hand, '''User talk''' pages are created if you want to talk to that specific member privately. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:14, 27 February 2025 (UTC)

== Removing references to order of LiveJournal comics ==

[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1%3A_Barrel_-_Part_1&type=revision&diff=320394&oldid=320342 But WHY?]<br>
I'm very unhappy to realize you have deleted my hard work giving people a possibility to click through the first comics in the order they where released on livejournal. I have not checked them all, but I'm not happy that it has been deleted and would like to get it back. Pleas try to explain why you found it a good idea to remove this info from so many comics! I'm quite upset about it at the moment. And since you removed it would like you to restore it if you cannot make me see why! Seems there is also more info I put in that have been deleted? :-( --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 19:31, 10 March 2025 (UTC)

:You are mistaken! I actually liked the idea of browsing the first comics in the original order ''so much'' that I moved it above the explanation! This means it's now much easier to browse them in the correct order, because the user is no longer required to scroll to the bottom of the page: the links are right below the comic.

:I did this for all the 50ish comics. I think you might also have missed the "Original title" and "Original caption" parts of these first comics. In every one of these comics, right under the title (above the image) there's an "Original title". Likewise, below every Title text there's now an "Original caption" part, which contains the LiveJournal caption. See for example comics [[4: Landscape (sketch)]] or [[8: Red spiders]]. I also added a link to the specific LiveJournal post both on the title and caption parts, so users can see them for themselves. Your hard work no longer sits in the hidden Trivia section, but is actually above everything else and easier to read and use!

:I do think it's still not perfect, especially part to browse the comics. I'd like to create a custom template with real buttons (not just links) and an actual explanation of the situation, or maybe integrate it directly into the {{tl|comic}} template. But still, a much better solution than putting everything in the last section! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:47, 11 March 2025 (UTC)

::I'm sorry for the harsh words. Late that night I realized all my trivia info was deleted (did see the original title text was added), but did not realize that the info was relegated to a more prominent place. So I take back my comment, and instead now thank you for improving my work. Hope you accept this apology from a message written at a bad time. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 12:58, 12 March 2025 (UTC)

:::Of course! You were very polite. I'm glad you're still active in this wiki :) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:16, 12 March 2025 (UTC)
::::Me to, so there at least is one active admin. Sadly I'm not very good at the tech stuff a<nd also do not have time to look into all kinds of wiki policies... Glad there are others like you who lift the mantle on those parts. We really need a guy like Davidy... --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 20:12, 13 March 2025 (UTC)

:::::UPDATE: I moved the sentences above the ==Explanation==, so it should now be clearer. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:01, 1 April 2025 (UTC)

== Jill's renaming ==

Hi FaviFake <br>
Just came around to think about the renaming og Science Girl, that I created, to Jill. I really do not like it, and we do not generally give generic figures a name, Megan and Danish the exceptions. And because she is in a comic based on a children song, the name is clearly from the song not because the generic Science Girl is called Jill. Jill is not even used in the comic, only in the title text. You wrote there where no less than three discussions regarding this name change, agreeing with you. But they are not on the talk page of Science Girls page. I'm seriously considering changing it back, so let me know where these discussions are located. I also think it was a mistake to call Danish, Danish, but it beats calling her Black Hats girlfriend. It was just a nickname he used, and they killed the witness as no one must know... But that was done way before I began editing this page. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 16:21, 30 March 2025 (UTC)

:Hey, thanks for your message! I'll respond tomorrow because I don't have time, but for now I just wanted to note somewhere (before I forget) that I looked though all 41 appearances and counted the times where science is the main theme of the comic. The result was that the majority of Jill appearences are not related to science. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:07, 30 March 2025 (UTC)

::Well I will have to check that but the first instance was included because it was a girl who where interested in science even though she doesn't look like ScienceGirl. And an adult version of her was included because it was science again. The question is of course if there are now a different girl... But I do not like the naming of her. We did refrain from naming Cueball Rob, and there was also someone who did not like Megan. But that I like now. I prefer keeping Danish, but do not like the reason why she got than name. And other generic characters have been given a name in some comics without we used this. And really feel it is wrong to name her after a children song just because she was in a comic about that song! --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 09:26, 31 March 2025 (UTC)

{{Outdent|::}}
Hey.
And an adult version of her was included because it was science again.
I'm not entirely sure what you're referring to, but this would actually help my case! "Girl" implies she's either a teenager or a child. This means that, if you wanted to broaden her definition to also include "adult versions", you'd have to use another name. Science Woman? Science Female Charachter? I think Jill is better: it sounds like a name a child would have, but doesn't prevent us from giving the name Jill to adult versions. If we change our minds and Jill also becomes a woman, we don't have to remove the "girl" part.

We do not generally give '''generic figures''' a name
But I don't think she's a generic figure. In a bit more than a third of the comic appearences, she's specifically interested in science. This, to me, means she's likely the same person on most of the comics. SHe also has a similar behaviour.

Even if that weren't the case, we would still have to find a name for her that's generic enough, that represents her qualities, AND that's not a proper name. Or, we could just call her what Randall called her, "[[Jill]]". There is precendent on this wiki for giving a name to a character based solely on one instance, where the name wasn't even intended: that's [[Danish]]. Even more: Danish was used by Randall as an adjective, but here Randall gave us a proper name!

There where no less than three discussions regarding this name change, agreeing with you.
I didn't say they agreed with me. There was no consensus on all of them, iirc, mainly because few people partecipated. Yes, I remember they weren't on her talk page, which is weird, but they were somewhere else. I remember they were mostly even.

The first instance was included [...] even though she doesn't look like Science Girl
That specific comic is an exception, in all other comics she has a bun with trailing hair. Randall may have drawn a ponytail because of the limited space. Anyways, as I said, the majority of the comics featuring her aren't mainly about science. (Of course, almost all Randall comics relate to science, but I counted comics where it was intented.)

We did refrain from naming Cueball Rob
That's because there was consensus on the fact that Cueball is an everyman, while Rob is the same charachter.

And really feel it is wrong to name her after a children song just because she was in a comic about that song!
Well that's the only mention of her name we have, even if it's unrelated. I like that she was named after a nursery rhyme, it fits her character, since she's a child.

[...] I really do not like it, [...]

[...] I do not like the naming of her. [...]

[...] There was also someone who did not like Megan. But I like [Megan] now. [...]

[...] I really '''feel''' it is wrong to name her after a children song [...]
I'm starting to see a trend here. Do you think it could be possible you're against the name change because you simply... don’t like how it sounds? I didn't like how "Science Girl" sounded, but that's not why I changed her name...

--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:34, 31 March 2025 (UTC)
:Thanks for the reply. Sadly you could not show me any discussion about the name change. Only that you said there where. So that did not help. Yes maybe I used the same wording many time. Also not native English speaker so may have less options to express my meaning... What I do not like about Jill and using that comic to name her, is that I do not think that comic at all is representative of the character I had identified and named Science Girl. But I do agree that if there are several instances where she is represented as an adult it could be a problem. I only new her as adult in [[1520: Degree-Off]] and I can see this has been changes, although I believe this should be reverted as this is not hairbun bu Science Girl. I did not know it had been removed. In this [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1520:_Degree-Off&oldid=123879 version] she was named Science Girl] but it was removed without my knowing. And that she was an adult version was in this [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Jill&oldid=123921 version]. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 16:35, 31 March 2025 (UTC)
::Looking at comics now, and just found this one, without looking for Jill and saw her here: [[2747: Presents for Biologists]]. To me the important thing is the interest in science and that the hairbun is not tight but with strings of hair hanging loose. So maybe the explanation to Jill should be changed to a young woman, often a child with a loose hairbun, not to be3 confused with the generic every woman Hairbun... Then Degree-Off is also clearly Jill. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:56, 31 March 2025 (UTC)
{{Outdent|::}}
Also not native English speaker so may have less options to express my meaning
I'm also not a native speaker, I'm Italian! :D I wasn't pointing out your choice of words but rather what you were trying to say, which is (I think?) that you don't like the name. Anyways:

To me the important thing is the interest in science [...] So maybe the explanation to Jill should be changed to a young woman [...]
It seems your opinion has changed completely then! This is what [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Jill&oldid=123921 you wrote] about [[Hairbun]] before I joined this wiki:
''Since she [Hairbun] is a '''grown woman''', she should not be confused with Science Girl or any other '''small girls''' with hair bun like in [[1584: Moments of Inspiration]].''
According to this logic in this comic:
* [[1520: Degree-Off]] - taller than other woman and man, so a woman → '''not Jill'''
* [[2747: Presents for Biologists]] - as tall as other woman and man, so a woman → '''not Jill'''

Also, this would mean we'd have to rename Jill to someone else in a third or a fourth of her appearences.

But I do agree that if there are several instances where she is represented as an adult it could be a problem
I agree! If there's one thing that I think everyone can agreen on is that we shoudn't call a grown woman a "girl". And "Science Woman" sounds like a superhero.

So, to avoid naming Hairbun '''based on how she looks''' and Jill '''based on her displayed interest''' (I'll remind you, you said in Hairbun's page that this is Hairbun:)
[[File:Hair Bun Girl with curly hair and ponytail.png]]

...all i did was standardise the matter:
*'''Jill is a child OR girl that always has trailing hair''' (except 1 comic), and
*'''Hairbun is an adult that sometimes has trailing hair.'''

I think any other definition would be incredibly confusing. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:03, 1 April 2025 (UTC)
:Well I originally put in degree off as Science Girl as she both looked and behaved like Science Girl. So I may have changed my mind. Cannot find the picture you said that I said was Hairbun? Maybe it was from before I introduced Science Girl. I have created both of these characters and then others have changed the explanation and the name. I also called her [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Hairbun&oldid=88388 Hair Bun Girl], which I can now see it wrong since she was a woman, but again, not native English. Here is my first creation of [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Jill&oldid=123862 Science Girl]. There where more than a year between, so maybe I changed my mind regarding which could be hairbun in between? I'm certainly more interested in having those characters with hairbun and dangling hair to be another than normal hairbun now. And would today have collected those that looks like that together. Also there are many instances of Jill where she do not have a speaking part, thus saying she is always interested in science doesn't fit with how she is listed now... It is difficult. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 12:57, 2 April 2025 (UTC)

::Oh yeah that makes sense, I didn't consider the fact that Science Jirl was created possibly years after Hairbun. I'm not sure I understood your last sentence, about Jill not speaking? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:26, 2 April 2025 (UTC)
:::I think only a year after. But still. I meant that there are several instances with Jill where she do not have a speaking part in the comic, and thus cannot be said to have a special interest in science or her sharp wit. So if science should be her main indicator then she has to say something. But I do not really know how to make this as best as it could be. (Science Jirl, Jirl a combination of Jill and Girl ;-) --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 12:46, 4 April 2025 (UTC)

::::It'd be so funny if we settled on Science Jirl haha. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:10, 4 April 2025 (UTC)

== As I can't edit it... ==

Regarding the Editor FAQ:
For headlines, you have to use wiki-style code. The simplest way is a preceding semicolon at the beginning of the line which causes the entire line to be rendered in bold.
...I might be tempted to say something like "This makes use of {{w|Help:Wikitext#Description_lists|Description List}} markup", given how there are circumstances when a ";something:fuller description of something" is also actually useful. And then go on to say something about how this is functionally simpler than the actual (sub-)header use of =s, ==s, ===s, etc, (which you'd be advised to check what 'level' of (sub-)header you're already working in and go for the next level on from that) and would the usually be recorded in a Table Of Contents of either the page concerned or any page which it is transcluded within.

Except that we're going into really ''technical'' territory with the latter bit. Generally, ==s are for Explanation, Transcript, Trivia headers in comics, you could say. (The reason being is that the Main Page has a single-= header under which the Latest Comic is transcluded and so ==s are best to be inherited as transient sub-headers - but you don't need to say that... it's just an obvious reasong behind the stylistic decision.) Headering a section other than these, in a comic (such as a place for a Table Of Things, or similar) would generally be ===ed (or, rarely, ====ed, as a sub-sub-header of the Explanation/whatever). It is best to avoid any ===+ing at all in the Comic Talk page because, if the Comic page itself gets a TOC (some do, most don't, but all ''potentially'' could) then the transcluded Discussion gets (probably!) inadvertently and improperly added in. (You can force a NOTOC, and some other tricks, but I've never been able to find a NOTOCIFTRANSCLUDED-like thing, not without peppering noinclude sections around section headers, which is... getting ''far'' too complicated.) So, just saying "Don't use '==...'s in Talk Pages, stick to ';'s..." (even without the reasoning) might be an advisable statement.

Yeah, I'm giving you a lot of stuff here (I think you know all of it, actually), hopefully you can tease out some of the bits actually useful to suggest in the FAQ. :P [[Special:Contributions/172.68.205.164|172.68.205.164]] 21:52, 11 April 2025 (UTC)

Darnit, also meant to add that in the {{template|Citation needed}} explanation you wrote, could you change {{template|actual citation needed}} to {{template|Actual citation needed}}? The latter is the actual template, the former is just a redirect. No harm in ''using'' the redirect-needing ones (generally), but you might as well advertise the correct ones. Like you don't advertise {{template|cn}} or <nowiki>{{template|fact}}</nowiki> (both ->{{template|Citation needed}}, as are {{template|citation needed}}, {{template|Citation Needed}} and other case-accomadating variations), though people still are able to use them. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.205.164|172.68.205.164]] 21:58, 11 April 2025 (UTC)

:Sorry but you're gonna have to give me exactly what you want me to paste in the article, I haven't understood a word of what you said. I changed the actual cit needed thinghy--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:45, 12 April 2025 (UTC)

==User page creation==
I just wanted to say thanks again for making my user page! --[[User:Xnerkcd|xnerkcd]] ([[User talk:Xnerkcd|talk]]) 17:38, 13 April 2025 (UTC)
:No worries! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:22, 13 April 2025 (UTC)

==Admin==
What does an admin do? Are they just the people that can create pages?
:Not an admin, but they basically manage the wiki state-of-affairs and oversee day-to-day operation. Basically, a stepup from typical moderators. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.208.206|172.69.208.206]]
::I guess that's what they're ''supposed'' to do. Because of the status quo, they just sometimes pop back in and do stuff we can't. We can however create pages ourselves. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:46, 15 April 2025 (UTC)

== A Barnstar For You :3 ==

{| style="border: 1px solid {{{border|gray}}}; background-color: {{{color|#fdffe7}}};"
|rowspan="2" style="vertical-align:top;" | {{#ifeq:{{{2|}}}|alt|[[File:Blueprint Barnstar 3.PNG|100px|border]]|[[File:Blueprint Barnstar 2.PNG|100px|border]]}}
|rowspan="2" |
|style="font-size: x-large; padding: 0; vertical-align: bottom; height: 1.1em;" | '''The Template Barnstar'''
|-
|style="vertical-align: top; border-top: 1px solid gray;" | Thanks for all of your work on improving the templates on here! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 20:01, 18 April 2025 (UTC)
|}
:Thanks so much! But [[User:Firestar233]] definitely deserves that award more than I do! He created the templates for the what if? index that are still incredibly useful! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:31, 18 April 2025 (UTC)

==''Restructuring [[Header text]] as a table''==
''The messages regarding the [[Talk:Header text|''Header text'' reformatting]] project have been moved to '''[[Talk:Header text]]'''. To add a new topic regarding the projects, [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:Header_text&action=edit&section=new click here].'' --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:15, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

== So, the HiddenCat..? ==

You do seem pleased that it works, but I can't work out what you've done by it (presuming it has effects upon a different page). And slightly worried by the additional redlinked category that the page now has. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.229.161|172.68.229.161]] 19:31, 5 May 2025 (UTC)

:Sure. See {{mw|Help:Categories#Hidden_categories}}. I only applied it for the new All pages and the old All comics cats. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:13, 6 May 2025 (UTC)

:Solved the redlink (non-)issue by un-redlinking it (aka creating the cat). --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:55, 6 May 2025 (UTC)

::Still less than wise as to what ''problem'' it solves, but I'm just happy that you're happy. ;)
::Also "The categories that a page is in are normally listed at the bottom of the page." I'd have written as "The categories that a page <u>are</u> in are normally listed at the bottom of the page.", to match "categories=>are" ''or'' "<u>Each category</u> that a page is in <u>is</u> normally listed at the bottom of the page." to force "category=>is" agreement- but maybe that's a UK-English v.s. US-English thing. (Or just my particular regional sub-dialect of English (quite near me there's a place where "we was" and "I was" are considered 'correct' and another where "we were" and "I were" are, so there's easily room for such confusion, even though I'm a "we were" and "I was" person myself). Or just me be entirely mistaken about something!) [[Special:Contributions/172.68.205.187|172.68.205.187]] 20:52, 6 May 2025 (UTC)

:::> ''Still less than wise as to what ''problem'' it solves
:::Solves the problem of displaying a category that should not be seen by users.

:::Also, your suggestion seems grammatically incorrect. The "is" you'd like to change to an "are" is referring to "a page", not "categories". You may want to read the sentence again. afaik, "a page is here" is correct and "a page are here" is incorrect. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:18, 7 May 2025 (UTC)

== Exclusive xkcd textbook comics ==

Hey uhhh does anyone know about [https://www.nytimes.com/2016/03/22/science/randall-munroe-xkcd-science-textbook.html this]? Should we make explanations for these?
--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[DSBContribs |'''''My life choices''''']] 20:48, 8 May 2025 (UTC)

Google's Ai says there are multiple exclusive comics for the textbook, but I've only been able to find Inside Body, shown here:

[[File:Inside Body.jpg|300px]]

 {{unsigned|DollarStoreBa'al|23:07, 8 May 2025‎}}
:Hey, I'm afraid you'll have to be more specific about what "this" and "these" are. You might be looking for this page: [[New York Times: Good Question]]. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:06, 9 May 2025 (UTC)
::'This' links to a NYT article about randall munroe doing illustrations for a science textbook. Google's AI overview says there are three exclusive comic for this. I've only been able to find one. I'm asking if we should add explanations for these new comics. I have given it the temporary name 'Inside Body', since when I saved the image from the NYT article, the name 'Inside Body comic' was used.--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[DSBContribs |'''''My life choices''''']] 16:59, 9 May 2025 (UTC)
:::upon further investigation, the article is on the page you linked to. My question is still whether we add an explanation for Inside Body. Also, do we add explanations for the other comics shown in the science textbook pages? --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[DSBContribs |'''''My life choices''''']] 17:02, 9 May 2025 (UTC)

::::A large language model is one of the most unreliable sources of information. Unless you find any other site or person mentioning that there are exclusive xkcd comics on some textbooks, I don't think we should in any way create pages based on what a large language model generated. Can you find any actual sources?

::::We might still explain that one specific comic, but this is not the right place to discuss this, we should use the community portals. Besides, there are many other comics in [[New York Times: Good Question]] that aren't explained. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:06, 9 May 2025 (UTC)

== It's a date. ==

I'm confused by {{diff|377635|the ISO Dates edit}}. First of all, as explained in my full revert's summary, lowercase are (mostly) reserved for time-placeholders and uppercase used for date-placeholder. And I checked a number of separate documentations and implementations where datetime format variations are described/configured, without finding even one that consistently reserved only "MM", etc, for month, for disambiguation with time's equivalent "mm"-for-minutes, but lowercased everything else.

Secondly, the apparent reason for this edit did not mention this. (Perhaps an overzealous editor auto-correct? Except it/you 'missed a few' and came back to 'fix' them.) The reason actually suggests a sentence's meaning was previously reversed when it clearly was not.

I reverted to before both your edits and those which had prompted your mass-'correction'. Technically, this leaves the "US format in binary" incorrect, which was the only case-change that the prior editor had actually rationalised before you. An argument ''could'' be made that "mm/dd/yyyy" could be parsable as being "MM/DD/YYYY, but in binary", like kb/kilobits is to kB/kilobytes... though that's not even how it's phrased and I'm sure that this should indeed be uppercased like it had been. I also think the other change, to the sentence, is more elegant (for the exact same meaning), but am allowing for a slight possibility that I'm wrong about that. As such, I'm letting you consider where we go from here. Revert my change (the latest, as I type) to re-'fix' things back into lowercase, if you have enough reason to, or reassess the things you blitzed and restore the "binary date" and/or rephrased "drop leading zeros" edits.

Any further discussion, on either original issue, I will leave between you and the other editor, though I thought I'd give you a direct nod about my full reasons why I nuked ''both'' changes, as you had apparently put far more effort into your contributions (for right or wrong). And I'm not currently unconvinced by ''their'' edits, but maybe you can take the opportunity to explain things better and switch my opinions over to your POV. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.229.44|172.68.229.44]] 04:05, 13 May 2025 (UTC)

:Sure! I just made the table on that page sortable again. Microsoft has always used yyyy, dd, and MM in their settings, so I assumed that was the standard. Thanks!--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:55, 13 May 2025 (UTC)

== From Kynde's page ==

::::: And finally: the typos in the message you replied to were caused by my keyboard autocorrecting my words (my pc is broken). When you reply, do it on my talk page so we don't spam Kynde's. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 12:44, 29 June 2025 (UTC)
{{outdent|:::::}}
:Hello, I think you mistook another IP's recent comment as being from me-IP, from things said prior to the above. There are a few of us around, and I don't mind being mixed up with some of them (or vice-versa) that are similarly longterm maintainers of seemingly good intentions. Though I think that IP also used "propogate" instead of "propagate" (like I know I've got my own blindspots in spelling/grammar, and occasional tendency to lapse into dialect), which also amused me.
:As to your autocorrection-errors, it surprised me... In my experience, non-native but fluent of English don't let mistakes like that happen, and you're certainly up there with native speakers (il mio italiano è per lo più limitato a ciò che può fare un traduttore online... così!). I think it just looked... careless. Also, strangely induced errors.
:Don't let me discourage you, you've gone to a lot of trouble. Some things maybe necessary, some things maybe more just 'your own vision' that I could take or leave. Just that the "diff" page doesn't always align things to make it easy to compare old vs. new versions for anything more complicated than paragraphs/bullets/tabling to bullets/tabling/paragraphs or tabling/paragraphs/tables (as required). Complete rewrites don't help, even assuming that they accurate rewrites.
:...so, this is my response. From your invitation. Of course I can't speak for anyone else involved. [[Special:Contributions/92.23.2.228|92.23.2.228]] 18:17, 29 June 2025 (UTC)

::Oh well, until you decide to create a proper account I will blindly assume every IP that uses parentheses and subclauses is the same exact person! You are everyone.

:: Grazie per il complimento; il mio inglese would be better if I cared about looking over every message I post. I usually only extensively proofread article changes. You're right, that specific mistake wasn't an auto correction, I just didn't want to explain everything, but I have time to kill so I guess I'll just do it. On mobile, i prefer using Gboard's glide typing feature, which can sometimes mistake two words even if their letters are almost completely different. You can look it up, it looks cool, though I doubt it'd be ergonomic to use on your tablet. That's why help became hello.

:: Amusingly, there's a grammar error in your reply that I'll let you find! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 22:17, 30 June 2025 (UTC)

== Rather than re-de-revert. ==

{{quote|The text "Don't remove this notice too soon" is there when there isn't a specific reason the page is incomplete. Now there is a clear moment when the page can be marked as complete. Not sure why you put back the PAGE CREATED BY thingy|{{diff|381894|Your re-revert}}}}

It's not just "Don't remove the 'Don't remove this text too soon' text too soon"... It's contectually applying to the ''whole'' incompleteness tag. Now, I'm not saying that, without it, people will think it ok to remove the whole thing, but there's no reason to remove it until you're removing the whole thing as solved. What even is the benefit of doing so?

But, honestly, I restored it not for meta-ontological purposes, but because I was actually trying to counter the strange removal of the PAGE CREATED BY bit. I appreciate that you may think that it confuses new readers, and I daresay that it does (a little bit), but it probably confuses them more when some new comics have this time-honoured bit of site culture and some do not. Whereas they shouldn't really take too long to realise that:
* "CREATED BY A BOT" is basically what it says on the tin, before any human has had a chance to ponder the newly added page,
* "CREATED BY <A JOKE>" is a new article once the rabble have gotten to it,
** ...though, IMO, you should only normally change it as "first editor" (or "first editor with a good idea ror a joke to put there") with something to contribute into the Explanation and/or Transcript (or will do momentarily), not ''just as a "FIRST!"-type thing then leave it...
** ...and you should think twice before changing someone else's joke to your own; perhaps refine it (oapply mild corrections to grammar/spelling/whatever it's trying to reference), but if you just totally "no, MY IDEA!" it, what's to stop the next person going "no, no, ''MY'' IDEA!!"? Just accept what's there (or tweak it, honourably), you'll perhaps be able to get (and keep for a reasonable time) the subtle 'bragging rights' to a future comic, if everyone plays nice and doesn't just entirely change it on a whim. Or remove it for no good reason, before the whole tag is considered superfluous anyway...
* If someone (like yourself) adds in an incomplete tag ''back'' into a previously 'presumed complete' page, that can happily stay without the BOT-inspired humour. Unless one feels like it, but actually adding the tag back in to pages, which (by wiki convention) are always open to being re-edited if you so wish,
** ...if I may say, adding an "incomplete|X and Y need doing to this page", instead of just doing X and Y to the page, is a waste of edits. I appreciate there are some things you might not be able to actually do (explain something that currently confuses you, for example), but occasionally it's a request to trivially reformat something, and no obvious reason why you haven't just done the reformatting in this edit. If you haven't time to do it all now, it doesn't need a placeholder to make a note to yourself to come back and do it when you can..
** ...and, unless you've changed it since I last looked, there's at least one "X needs doing" that seems to have been done but the "X needs doing" tag is still there. Haven't been able to work out if ''not all'' X has been done (for some reason), or whoever did complete it left this tag (whether or not they've deleted othersz along the way). When I have time to to through it line-by-line (more work than to quickly write something like this, which is to explain things that are clearly not as self-evident as I had thought), maybe I'll be the one to remove the notice to that effect..

I have no doubt that some of my thinkings around these matters (and various site traditions/conventions, which may predate me and do definitely prefate you) are perhaps a little strange. Similarly, I find some of your thinking strange. Or at least what I imagine is your thinkings, based upon your occasional doings. As it is practically impossible to cover all the various aspects of thought (or ideas about your aspects of thought) in an Edit Summary, especially one with "Reverting edit by..." filler already in it, this is to make up for the rather limited and compressed 'explanation' you perhaps had to make do with previously.

And it's only my opinion, albeit based upon site consensus (messy and ever-changing as that is) that I've absorbed from my time here. Perhaps you wish to shift consensus, but I'd of course like you to at least know that ''this is what you're doing''. If you don't know this, your well-meaning attempts to restandardise the groupçsnhive mind may just be more confusing than productive. Perhaps you may want to say "I don't think we should <foo> any more", rather than just de-<foo> everything without warning people that you might be treading on their metaphorical toes. Not that I can stop you, but every now and then I might be seeming to tread on your own toes (with no malicious intent), just because we're dancing to completely different beats. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.246.216|82.132.246.216]] 17:10, 25 July 2025 (UTC)

:Hi!

There's no reason to remove it until you're removing the whole thing as solved. What even is the benefit of doing so?

:That message is part of the default text for new comics. If someone has changed the incomplete tag, it's harder to notice that a specific reason has been created if the old text is still there. For these reasons, I believe editors are more likely to overlook what's written in the notice, thinking it only contains the default text.

[H]onestly, I restored it not for meta-ontological purposes

:What's a meta-ontological purpose?

the strange removal of the PAGE CREATED BY bit. I appreciate that you may think that it confuses new readers, and I daresay that it does (a little bit), but it probably confuses them more when some new comics have this time-honoured bit of site culture and some do not.

:Two things:
:1. The main reason I remove it is to avoid the above: editors thinking nobody pointed out specific page issues. And not just newer editors, even I sometimes miss an incomplete reason because I SEE THE ALL CAPS TEXT AND THINK NOBODY CHANGED IT. (im not screaming)

:2. Recently, I don't remove the joke from the LATESTCOMIC, unless it's really hard to see the actual incomplete reason.

"CREATED BY A BOT" is basically what it says on the tin, before any human has had a chance to ponder the newly added page,

:That hasn't been the case for months now. Look at the OG versions of the pages. Editors are adding it wholesale.

...though, IMO, you should only normally change it as "first editor" (or "first editor with a good idea ror a joke to put there") with something to contribute into the Explanation and/or Transcript (or will do momentarily), not just as a "FIRST!"-type thing then leave it...
...and you should think twice before changing someone else's joke to your own; perhaps refine it (oapply mild corrections to grammar/spelling/whatever it's trying to reference), but if you just totally "no, MY IDEA!" it, what's to stop the next person going "no, no, MY IDEA!!"? Just accept what's there (or tweak it, honourably), you'll perhaps be able to get (and keep for a reasonable time) the subtle 'bragging rights' to a future comic, if everyone plays nice and doesn't just entirely change it on a whim. Or remove it for no good reason, before the whole tag is considered superfluous anyway...

:I haven't considered this type of edit warring before, and I'm happy to stay away from it. I'm not sure whether the "you" was referring to me specifically, because I only edited the CREATED BY once or twice (i mostly remove it when it's old or hides the real reason a page is incomplete).

adding an "incomplete|X and Y need doing to this page", instead of just doing X and Y to the page, is a waste of edits

:I've been trying to do that less recently

If you haven't time to do it all now, it doesn't need a placeholder to make a note to yourself to come back and do it when you can..

:I thought this use was accepted. I do it because if someone else gets there before me, they can do it themselves. Could you suggest other ways for saving these small-but-needed edits?

unless you've changed it since I last looked, there's at least one "X needs doing" that seems to have been done but the "X needs doing" tag is still there.

:I think I've always removed an incomplete tag I created myself for all comics that aren't the ~20 most recent if, after chacking the page, I notice the editor has forgotten (and I always check the edits within a few days unless im on vacation). Please feel free to remove all my or others' incomplete tags if you notice it's complete. I don't understand why you're saying you noticed one and seemingly didn't remove it? If the editor that fixes the page forgets, it's up to whoever notices first to remove it.

Similarly, I find some of your thinking strange. Or at least what I imagine is your thinkings, based upon your occasional doings.

:Yeah I don't think I've ever explained my removals of the CREATED BY things. To summarise:
:Reason number 1) editors thinking nobody pointed out specific page issues because they think it's still the default notice.
:Reason number 2) the comic is old
:Reason number 3) confuses new users, but in the last year or so I haven't worried about this because I removed the incomplete notices from the [[Main Page]]. Hopefully the newbies will look at the mainpage first.

Perhaps you may want to say "I don't think we should <foo> any more", rather than just de-<foo> everything without warning people that you might be treading on their metaphorical toes.

:It's not that I want the tradition to stop, it's just that it gets in the way of productiveness. A notice is the most powerful thing we have to spread a message, and yet we use it as a joke which sometimes hides what's actually wrong with the page. I wish there were a way to keep the CREATED BY's and still allow for important notices to be highly visible. Currently, if I have to choose one, I choose the latter. Do you have any ideas about this? New templates, edits to the bot script, new fields for the existing template, a different notice type, etc?

:Also, any thoughts on the topic above. Your suggestions are often a good start but then you stop replying :( ㅤ [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 13:21, 26 July 2025 (UTC)

::Ok, my prior reply seems to have been not posted, for reasons I can only guess (dodgy connection, looked like it happened but I moved on too quick, or didn't notice I'd landed on Edit Conflict, something like that?). But I've also been way too busy to actively ponder if you've not bothered to respond to me, in turn.
::Not going to recompose everything, at length, but Incomplete templates ''easily'' contain the original BOT text/user-version, as long as users don't go over-creative over it. Genuine reasons added to this are still visible. The BOT-original "don't delete this too soon" doesn't become any more superfluous than the now ubiquitous "editing it" link. For as long as the notice is 'new' on a new article, there's no reason at all to squeeze anything out in most circumstances. Don't underestimate the readership.
::If you're adding a box back in for an old article that has passed such 'newness' (or where there never was one), keep it as businesslike as you wish, of course.
::If you have a long, complicated list of things, it's probably a long, complicated article where you can site an Incomplete notice by the side of each troublesome item (as you have done).
::Not going any further, like pointing you back at innumerable 'classic' examples of it all just working (whether new users or old users took the necessary hints), as that was a lot of wasted work from last time I 'replied'. But it's all there in the back-pagesz if you care to look. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.245.128|82.132.245.128]] 16:45, 5 August 2025 (UTC)

:::Short and sweet reply, I like it! You should have a dodgy connection more often :D I seem to care about the notice much less than you do, so, sure; I'll keep it on relatively new articles and do whatever if it's older and doesn't still have the original. I still wish there were an easier solution, but it's just a notice. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:53, 6 August 2025 (UTC)

== Questions ==

Dear FaviFake

I posted a new question on the Randall question thing. I have no clue how to use the Wiki, but I still did my best to post a question. If I did it wrong please forgive me and I'll do my best next time.

PS. The question I posted is all the way down, at least as I am writing now.

[[User:Little Timmy|Little Timmy]] ([[User talk:Little Timmy|talk]]) 01:30, 29 July 2025 (UTC)Little Timmy[[User:Little Timmy|Little Timmy]] ([[User talk:Little Timmy|talk]]) 01:30, 29 July 2025 (UTC)

:No worries, that was good. You can learn more about editing this wiki on [[explain xkcd:Editor FAQ]]. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:50, 29 July 2025 (UTC)

==''Restoring the mini [[Comic series]]''==
''The messages regarding the [[Talk:Comic series|definition of a proper "comic series"]] have been moved to '''[[Talk:Comic series]]'''. To add a new topic regarding the comic series, [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:Comic_series&action=edit&section=new click here].'' --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:46, 31 July 2025 (UTC)
== Leaderboard ==

Wow, you probably know already but I’m just re-reminding you that you fell out of 1st place. Keep up the good contributions! {{Special:ContributionScores/10/7/nosort,notools}} [[User:Aprilfoolsupdate!| <sup>April</sup><sub>fools</sub><sup><sub>update</sub></sup>!]]([[User talk:Aprilfoolsupdate!|talk]]) 09:57, 7 August 2025 (UTC)

:Oh well, I surely care more about [[Special:ContributionScores#All time (Top 50)|this other list]]. Thanks! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 13:09, 7 August 2025 (UTC)

::I never knew this list existed! I wonder what’s behind it? The “well known” one is <nowiki> {{Special:ContributionScores/50/7/nosort,notools}} </nowiki> I guess, but what’s the one for this list?[[User:Aprilfoolsupdate!| <sup>April</sup><sub>fools</sub><sup><sub>update</sub></sup>!]]([[User talk:Aprilfoolsupdate!|talk]]) 13:11, 7 August 2025 (UTC)

:::Who knows! Maybe Mediawiki has the answer. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 13:20, 7 August 2025 (UTC)

== Small Talk (Or Something Like That) ==

Hey, how's things going? Everything alright? Any wiki-wide events I missed? Really miss how things were before. -Tori '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 15:51, 9 August 2025 (UTC)

:Hi welcome back!!! The only interesting thing imo opinion is that Randall replied to me again, I'm not sure if you saw that, see my userpage. :) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:39, 11 August 2025 (UTC)

::Oh and the [[Comic series]] page was divided into main series and miniseries and is now just a list of transclusions so we don't have to keep 2 pages up to date. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:41, 11 August 2025 (UTC)

== "I'll omit this part because I'm not sure it should be published." ==
why? [[user:lett‪herebedarklight|raeb]] 09:28, 18 August 2025 (UTC)
:What? could you elaborate? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:37, 19 August 2025 (UTC)
::randall's reply. the answer that starts "Most of those were inside jokes sent to friends [...]" [[user:lett‪herebedarklight|raeb]] 11:44, 19 August 2025 (UTC)
:::Oh right. Some have said it's a bit personal. Now that the sitewide banner's off I'll reinstate it. Thx. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:40, 20 August 2025 (UTC)
:::{{Done}} --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:42, 20 August 2025 (UTC)

== A rational rationale? ==

You know, some people complain about explanations being too long. Copying {{diff|384566|a swathe of wikipedia}} about twice as large as the original explanation text seems about as odd as initially deciding to removing that text (which linked to the page in question, for the curious) ''possibly'' because you personally didn't know about it. It's ok, not everyone does know, even native speakers, but also maybe the treatment originally given to that part could be reworded to slightly more compact. (I liked the flippant bit. But I wouldn't have said it quite like that, myself.) Yet there's some confusion over your underkill-then-overkill approach. And if I was going to rewrite it, it'd be more considered than either excising or copypasting. Could have just been left alone, though. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.237.85|82.132.237.85]] 17:27, 20 August 2025 (UTC)
:It said singular they was considered incorrect, iirc, which is not really the case nowadays. I did a bit of ce before pasting it; my logic was: either add it back correctly, or remove the wrong part. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:28, 31 August 2025 (UTC)

==Tori and I have an idea==
Please check the proposals board for an idea to subvert the 255 character signature limit. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 17:40, 29 August 2025 (UTC)

==[[:Template:comic discussion 1167]]==
Hi FaviFake. I was looking through the unused templates page to try to do some cleanup on here when I noticed a [[:Template:comic discussion 1167|template]] from back in 2013. You had originally tagged it as a page to delete, but then added a lot more to the template. Since it is still unused and I cannot surmise any purpose for it, I have re-tagged it. Would you mind explaining your thought process? Thanks, '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 16:36, 10 September 2025 (UTC)
:I don't remember why I used it, probably as a sandbox. It's unnecessary, thanks for flagging it.--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:58, 13 September 2025 (UTC)

==Contact Info Google Site==
Hi FaviFake, what is the URL for your Google Site of contact info? I remember that you had posted it on here, but I cannot find it. I was experiencing Cloudflare errors in the past 24 hours and was unable to contact anyone on Explain XKCD. I would greatly enjoy it if we had some other form of communication outside of here. Thanks. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 20:17, 12 September 2025 (UTC)
:Oh, thank god it's back. I noticed the outage and it seems someone had posted about it on reddit.
:The website is https://sites.google.com/view/FaviFake, you can bookmark it if you want. I noticed you're also on Reddit (and Wikipedia iirc), so I might contact you there if there's a more serious outage. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:58, 13 September 2025 (UTC)

== [[Hoverboard]] ==

I glad that someone has looked at my changes to this game description.

I am sorry, however, that you disagree with my two main points.

Can we discuss?

I see no point in getting into a "reversion war" over comments to a comic.

[[User:Sprucegrouse|Sprucegrouse]] ([[User talk:Sprucegrouse|talk]]) 13:52, 4 October 2025 (UTC)
:Of course. I simply think your version is too odd:
The best way to enjoy this comic is just to play the game! (Just be sure that you play using a web browser other than Safari.) If you have not yet tried (hard) to play it "cold" already, do so now. Reading beyond this Alert first will deprive you of the best this game has to offer.
Mine:
The best way to enjoy this comic is just to play the game! If you didn't do that already, reading anything below will spoil you from truly enjoying the comic.

I don’t see the need of specifying browsers, and the complex language you used, in a ''spoiler alert''. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:11, 4 October 2025 (UTC)

== Comic list numbers. ==

Had a look at all today's edits to the Comics-bar template, carefully, after making it fully correct. Though the other person apparently didn't spot it, and I didn't have enough space in the Explanation to say it in longhand, I think I need to appeal to you directly. Not ''entirely'' sure you realised what you were dealing with. Or you just have a weird idea of what's acceptibly correct.

If I'm actually wanting to look at the list that contains (say) comic 1500, I wouldn't find it by following the text "1500-<whatever>" that links to a 1501-2000 page. I would if I was followed the "<whatever>-1500" one, before that, that links to the explicitly 1001-1500 page. But quick scanning of the text might miss the obvious overlap and initially get you to explore only the latter. When you do, you get to the page that starts "2000, 1999, 1998, ...", then you scroll down to the bottom to find that it ''doesn't'' have the desired 1500 after all. (Before you ask, there are possible reasons that you might want to view the ''list'' item, and deliberately didn't go to the [[1500]] explanation page itself.) The explanation "unnecessary specificity" is at least misleading, and that edit made the whole top-bar misleading.

(Personally, I'd have gone with 1-499, 500-999, etc, even though the lack of a '0' makes the first one shorter. Each of them being (500n)+1 to 500(n+1), as it is, is also ok. But neither method is (500n) to 500(n+1), however you look at them.) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.195.93|81.179.195.93]] 18:44, 4 October 2025 (UTC)
:Fine, sure. If someone is looking for exactly 1500, rounding it will be annoying for them, but I thought the nicer round numbers were more important than full correctness. But I don't mind, you can change it back. There are bigger fishes to fry. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:26, 4 October 2025 (UTC)
::That's a very strange thought to have had, here in the home of mathematical nitpicking, nerd sniping, over-anaylsing and all-round adherence to the ideals of accuracy and/or precision. I'm just surprised that it spent so much time with a partial off-by-one error.
::Although I didn't actually personally notice it until one or more other people did and at least partially tried to fix it. I suppose we all have our blind spots! Though maybe this is one of those cases where some people, once they see the issue, [[2598: Graphic Designers|couldn't unsee it]]. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.195.93|81.179.195.93]] 22:28, 4 October 2025 (UTC)

==2==
`^ -_ /| /\ -\ /_ /` -\ -\ /` -` /\ %20 `^ ‘_ -`%20 -`|_ %20 |_ -` `’ -_ %20 ‘_ -’ /_ ‘_

^UP|DOWN -LEFT_RIGHT %20SPACE /DIAGDOWNLEFT \DIAGDOWNRIGHT `DIAGUPLEFT ‘DIAGUPRIGHT {{unsigned ip|204.137.100.1|21:45, 12 November 2025 (UTC)}}

:Ok, I've not worked out the exact symbolic logic, in use, but the plaintext is obvious. Then the significance of the tetragrams may be the final puzzle. (Sorry, Favi, they put this here. For whatever purpose.) [[Special:Contributions/82.132.245.223|82.132.245.223]] 22:30, 12 November 2025 (UTC)
:DOYOUNEEDHELP {{unsigned ip|204.137.100.1|22:48, 12 November 2025 (UTC)}}
::Personally, no. Not sure about you, though. ;) [[Special:Contributions/82.132.245.223|82.132.245.223]] 00:21, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
:::{{w|Beetle|HELP}}
::::Beetle? <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#E3C6BE">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#CC9A8B">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 14:30, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
wut [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:36, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
:IAMNOTJUSTANYBODY [[Special:Contributions/204.137.100.1|204.137.100.1]] 14:43, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
::WAIT A SECOND I GET IT!!!! <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#E3C6BE">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#CC9A8B">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 14:56, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
::Their hint wasn't about beetles, it was about the BEATles! 'I am not just anybody' is very deliberate wording. That wording happens to be used in the Beatles' Help! Look at the album cover for Help. It's quite memorable. Why? Because it uses FLAG SEMAPHORE. WHICH USES DIFFERENT ARM POSITIONS TO COMMUNICATE LETTERS. SPECIFICALLY, THERE ARE EIGHT DIFFERENT ARM POSITIONS. AND THERE ARE EIGHT SYMBOLS USED IN THAT CODE. AND, WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE {{w|Flag semaphore|FLAG SEMAPHORE WIKIPEDIA PAGE}}, IT HAS AN ALPHABET. AND WHEN YOU TRANSLATE IT, YOU GET:

::T R A N S M I S S I O N T W O O F F O U R W Q M W.

::Wow that's intricate. Okay, we have two now. That took a while. <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#E3C6BE">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#CC9A8B">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 15:13, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
::::Ah, right. I was still dealing with the backformation and plotting out the digrams on graph paper as two-element vectors (and misread the 'Q' as another 'O'). But of course everybody knows that ''HELP!'' {{w|Help!#Album cover|doesn't actually depict "HELP"}} [[Special:Contributions/82.132.245.223|82.132.245.223]] 16:12, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
:::Now we have XVERWQMW in total <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#E3C6BE">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#CC9A8B">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 15:25, 13 November 2025 (UTC)

== Is it you? ==
Are you {{w|User:FaviFake}}? I'm just here from enwiki. Further question: are you aware of a page like {{w|wikt:Wiktionary:Wiktionary for Wikipedians}} for this wiki that would explain the differences? I've been spending some time dealing with duplication of diffusing subcategories of [[:Category:Science]] and I'm slightly concerned that I haven't found an equivalent of {{w|WP:BOLD}} here so my actions might be somehow against how this wiki functions. Thanks for any help you might be able to give :) [[User:lp0 on fire|<span style="color: #c56030">lp0 on fire</span>]] [[User talk:lp0 on fire|<span style="color: #64cea0">()</span>]] 18:14, 27 November 2025 (UTC)
:Yes, it is me! What do you mean "explain the differences"?
:Here, everyone is BOLD since we have so few active editors. Welcome! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:07, 29 November 2025 (UTC)
:(Waited for FF to reply, for once, before sticking my own nose in.)
:Philosophically, explainxkcd is very much Wikipedia-like (far more so than Wiktionary is, though that's a high bar that's easy to limbo under).
:The main exceptions are probably discovered by practice, if not explained via the FAQ or other related pages. We don't like citation-style or note-style linking (<span style="font-color:#3366CC">[#</span>] or <sup>[<span style="font-color:#3366CC">#</span>]</sup>), prefering more the 'prosaic'/inline version, and use {{template|Actual citation needed}}s for when they're lacking because {{template|Citation needed}} is only used 'humorously' (YMMV!). The general format of Comics pages is fairly well tied down to an easily checkable (or correctable) house-style, also described elsewhere.
:Also (outside of the individual Talk/Discussion comments, which are going to just be how the attributed author ended up doing it) the default is to go with how US-English (Randall's version) is spelled, rather than how UK-/Commonwealth-English may be spelt (if you even realise/realize it applies... but someone may be along later to 'correct' it if they think it's labelled/labeled incorrectly). I ''think'' Wikipedia tends to ask for only in-article consistency (and tied to where the article's focus in the Anglosphere might primarily be). Of course, if you're in the US (or have had your {{w|English as a second or foreign language|ESOL}} education via an americanized school, rather than an anglicised one), you only really need to worry about your random tyops. :p
:My main advice(/advise? - no, I think that noun is still the same... it's things like practice/practise I need to remember to change!) is to hold off on creating new pages (especially Categories and Templates), until having checked how(/if) it fits with the others (e.g. what's the correct "Category:[[List of] Comics [with|featuring] ]FOO" form for what you want), as it saves someone having to rename it. Or mark it for deletion.
:But some of my personal preferences/expectations might well be 'YMMV'. It's (like Wikipedia) a collaborative site where the (active) community might reshape some expectations or granted latitudes over time. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.237.174|82.132.237.174]] 14:58, 29 November 2025 (UTC)
::Thanks, those are both helpful responces (that was a genuine typo; the humo[u]r was initially unintentional) in their own ways. If someone couls look over just one or two of the edits where I removed [[:Category:Science]] from articles that were already in one or more subcategories and confirm my edits were helpful I'd be very grateful. I think I'll mostly stick to Wikipedia (I've finally got round to writing an article!) but I might edit here intermittently. [[User:lp0 on fire|<span style="color: #c56030">lp0 on fire</span>]] [[User talk:lp0 on fire|<span style="color: #64cea0">()</span>]] 19:54, 3 December 2025 (UTC)
:::For what it's worth, as yet another random editor, I have at least looked at the first few of your 'Science removal' items. Where you're either replacing them with a 'more specialist science' or because that more specialist science was also already there. They mostly seemed like valid hierarchical changes (without delving into what cats were ''actually'' sub-cats of other cats), and certainly I don't think any that I wanted to bother change back again. Which is as good as you could hope, I'm sure. ;) [[Special:Contributions/78.144.255.82|78.144.255.82]] 20:20, 3 December 2025 (UTC)

== template coding? ==

Hi FaviFake! I know that you're probably pretty busy IRL, but could you take a look at [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#categories template]] and the new comments at [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Technical#Main page comic number]]? They both involve templates, which I remember you're pretty good with (Template:What if and Template:book). If you could lend your expertise into helping to implement these, or just giving your thoughts, that would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 10:21, 3 December 2025 (UTC)

== Incomplete template - the image seems broken ==

Hi FaviFake

On most pages with the incomplete template the image of work in progress seems to be broken. But sometimes it is not. I have tried to look into it, but cannot see what is wrong. Was it you who added the image? And can you fix it?

Regards --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 07:27, 20 January 2026 (UTC)--

:Hi... sorry to butt in, but see (sorry, long read) [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Technical#Interwiki media-linking errors.]] for one of several prior mentions of this (several people have noticed it) at least as far back as its mention in [[Talk:3191: Superstition]].

:I think the most immediate 'solution' is for someone to actually upload the used images (both green and blue) to this site. Then it won't go wrong due to whatever dodgy 'find and link' process is happening in the cross-site process.

:I've also found that clicking on the "Refresh" button (just above an Explanation Page's break-out box for the Discussion) sometimes makes it work. Sometimes makes it stop working. Sometimes makes the one that works stop working and vice-versa, in the same step. But if we can avoid that entirely then it's probably better. [[Special:Contributions/92.23.11.33|92.23.11.33]] 14:58, 20 January 2026 (UTC)

:Yeah, I'd hoped someone with upload privileges would take note and do the simple fix. Me and the last guy can't do that for you, of course.
:And my advice is to go for a raw 40x40px .png, or even .gif if you want to have fun with transparency/animation. Might be slightly larger file than the .svg ''or'' smaller (depends upon how unnecessarily inefficient it is, at markup level, SVGs tend to have unnecessary editor-specific info, etc), but if they're both going to be 40x40 in size (or whatever it is defined as), no point asking browsers or back-end to get a 400x400 image and dynamically scale it down all the time. Even the potentiallhly constant SVG rerendering is computationally unnecesary. Just because it's a fairly seemless process on computers with many more times the power of thirty years ago, it doesn't mean you shouldn't put a little thought into it. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.239.241|82.132.239.241]] 15:46, 20 January 2026 (UTC)
::Sure, feel free to do it if it hasn't been done already! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:39, 23 January 2026 (UTC)
:::Well, you/Kynde(/almost any other registered user likely to come by this page) needs to upload it... None of us IPs can, and it's truly a trivial thing to do.
:::If it helps, though, I've put the (40x40px) images in https://filebin.net/8s85i4hq9uch50u2 for you ('''that link lasts for about a week''').
:::Noting that they're each 4kb in size. While the SVG file from which it comes is 11kb (being text-tag markup, rather than an optimally compressed binary format), though a lot of that is SVG markup that isn't actually needed (or can be simplified), if you're into thinking about such things!
:::You could, of course, force yourself a 80x80 size PNG image from the original (probably still below 11kb - not that it matters, but I find such things interesting to consider) and force-scale this local version, in-situ, to show as 40x40 again. Might be slightly smoother/better for some people's browsers, though, even if it ends up looking virtually identical to native 40x40 in others. Also, you can easily colour-shift or otherwise mess about with the glyph (as SVG or not) to your heart's content for ''all kinds'' of new versions you could decide you need, even if wikicommons don't have something like that for you/us already.
:::Really, there's a whole lotta fun you can have with this... I actually envy you considering all the possible fine-tuning (or just skipping straight to the reupload (perhaps as "blue construction.png" and "green construction.png") and then perhaps trivially editing the templates as necessary to pick these up rather than trying to grab the 'original' amboxes. (Actually, I could probably do the latter bit, post-upload, but I'm sure you don't need me to.) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 21:13, 23 January 2026 (UTC)
::::I was too late for the filebin :(
::::I don't see the 40x40px thing anymore so maybe someone did it already?[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 07:44, 1 February 2026 (UTC)
:::::I think 42/Tori sorted it all out. (I could be wrong about who, but there were both 'hard' uploads and a small change to the template done by somebody. Checking the various history details would confirm who, but it certainly happened.) Doesn't stop other things like this going gaga, occasionally, but the two different 'under construction' images are certainly the ones that get used the most, i.e. across more of the most recent comic pages than anything else, so the occasional other cross-site image won't be as noticed. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 18:10, 1 February 2026 (UTC)
::::::Yup, I did it! Sorry for not notifying earlier... '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 03:06, 2 February 2026 (UTC)

{{Links}}

== The 'admin' complaint about Transcripts ==

I agree with {{diff|407393|this thing you removed}} not being an Admin Request, but I think the meaning is understandable, if it (ironically) had been written better by the OP.

Some people are just creating the (initial) Transcripts with source (without the indent) like:
Cueball is shown doing something.

"I like doing something!a"

Something happens in the next panel.

...
...when it ought to be ''more'' like:
:[In the first panel, Cueball is shown doing something.]
:Cueball: I like doing something!

:[In the second panel, something happens]
:...
...or ''something'' like that. Exact transcriptive styles vary, but I'd normally go with the global use of :-indents (in part to prevent lines running into each other, without double-linefeeding), [bracketing] purely descriptive bits, ascribing quoted text to their source (which could also be [bracketed], especially if the style of text itself needs describing) and extra entirely blank linefeeds (normally) ''only'' between 'scene changes'/subsequent action-panels. That's basically what I'd do, in creating a 'first transcript', or correcting a more format-unfriendly one in the prior style, but I know you've probably got your own (subtly different, but just as acceptible to me) variation on the theme. It ''might'' even be written down somewhere (the FAQ?), perhaps better/more accurate than I have done here... I haven't even checked how authoritative my own 'remembered' style guide is, but if ever I personally start/fix a Transcript I'm ok with any useful-looking necessary (re)fixing that others may make where I've perhaps not adhered to everybody's higher expectations.

But sometimes the exact needs of a Transcript (especially for particularly large, interactive and/or animated comics, of the kinds that Randall occasionally likes to spring on us, and which we also like to have been sprung on with!) do end up straining the 'standard' format(s) of Transript. Plus I would never, personally, begrudge an individual who went to the trouble of (at least ''semi-''accurately) typing in a whole lot of bare-bones 'text' from the comic, around which someone else can add the more proper and ultimately necessary transcriptive notes. It's all good, in the end, and all further collaboration must start off from ''some'' basis, however rushed and incomplete it might seem.

So, while I see where that particular editor was coming from. I wouldn't have written it like that myself. Nor with the same sort of exasperation/adm9nishment. (Nor would I take what I've tried, myself, to write above and suggest it be added to/supplanted on the FAQ... This is just from me to you, as it looks like I 'got' the linked-to issue a bit easier than you did. Or mistook it for what I've said, perhaps!) But, assuming I'm not wrong about the whole thing, I thought I'd give you my thoughts. For what they're worth. ;)

...maybe now is the right time (as if it wasn't before!) for me to go and see what the FAQ (or other 'how to' guide) ''does'' actually say about Transcript-writing. I know I'll have read it, if it exists, but my head's more full of how it has been ''practically'' applied, over theyears, so I might have been long labouring under a more descriptivist standard than any prescriptivist one. :p Still, HTH. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.239.97|82.132.239.97]] 13:47, 28 February 2026 (UTC)

And, now having actually checked... the relevent [[explain_xkcd:Editor_FAQ#What_is_the_format_of_the_transcript_section.3F|FAQ section]] is a little less comprehensive than my 'summary', above, but anyone who has read it (and obeyed the instruction to check established comic pages to get more of the gist) is well on the way to being able to comply with the general requirements. Of course, those who haven't read/remembered this bit of FAQ (also unlikely to read the Community Portal thoroughly, or even ''this'' page) are probably going to continue to have the 'wrong' idea about how to write a Transcript, but there really is little that can be done (except maybe for named-accounts having individual Talk-page interventions, assuming they read even them!) except for what we normally do. - i.e. 'fix' things, as and when, and if the person we had to fix notices it then they might even pick up the better method for future times. If only by osmosis! But that's the kind of thing me and you already expect to happen, I think I'm correct in saying, for all kinds of things. Not ''just'' with Transcripts. Or, on those few occasions where we (and others) may even slightly disagree with each other, land upon a happy medium that works for all. :D [[Special:Contributions/82.132.239.97|82.132.239.97]] 14:05, 28 February 2026 (UTC)
:Sure! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 23:03, 28 February 2026 (UTC)
::I think that the OP also refers to when we use <nowiki>'''bold text'''</nowiki> to show bold text, such as in [[3120]]. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#5CA7CF">tor</span><span style="color:#F08DB0">i :3</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#9E9E9E">talk </span><span style="color:#F08DB0">to </span><span style="color:#5CA7CF">me!</span>]]</span></sup> 03:28, 1 March 2026 (UTC)

== "Per the discussion at the community portal, ..." ==

Your likely right to do as you're doing, but... there ''was'' no discussion about the Blondie/Miss Lenhardt/etc thing. Are you mixing it up with the (unresolved) discussion about the Superheroes category, immediately above it?

I had no strong opinions about the grouping of Blondie/etc, merely don't feel comfortable about clearly misleading edit reasons. (Like just saying "grammar" for what was purely spelling/typo fixes, which happened again the other day, that I saw someone else do. Fair play for the correct correction, but still... Same with you mass re-edit. Probably valid, just looks a bit wrong.) [[Special:Contributions/82.132.246.233|82.132.246.233]] 15:29, 9 May 2026 (UTC)
:Oh, I was calling it a discussion in the sense that it was on a talk page. I meant it as a way of saying, "given the reasons posted at the community portal, I'm doing etc." I'll change the edit summary, thanks. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:33, 9 May 2026 (UTC)

== "never reply again" ==

Is this just a gut feeling that you have, or is it because of the time that he's spent not replying to you? Just wondering about your thought process. Cheers, [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 17:27, 15 May 2026 (UTC)
:Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't. Randall's got lots of stuff going on, including having to constantly maintain the webcomic while handling everything else. He seems willing to humor us but it's probably incredibly low on his priority list. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="font-family:Times; color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="font-family:Times; color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 18:05, 15 May 2026 (UTC)
:Yeah it's a gut feeling. If he's waited this long, I doubt he'll ever reply. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:50, 25 May 2026 (UTC)

== Template ==

Sorry, I didn't know about the template-[[User:This isn't a good name|This isn't a good name]] ([[User talk:This isn't a good name|talk]]) 23:01, 5 June 2026 (UTC)
:No worries! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:31, 7 June 2026 (UTC)

2288: Collector's Edition

2026-06-05T14:34:06Z

FaviFake: use the template!!!!!!!!!!!!

{{comic
| number = 2288
| date = April 3, 2020
| title = Collector's Edition
| image = collectors_edition.png
| titletext = I'm sure you can find some suitable worldbuilding material if you scavenge through the archives.
}}
{{series
| series = April
| number = 12
| date = April 3, 2020
| days_late = 2
| day_category = Friday
| prev_title = 1975: Right Click
| prev_date = April 1, 2019
| next_title = 2445: Checkbox
| next_date = April 1, 2021
| extra_text = [[#Trivia|Learn why this comic was released late]].
}}
{{TOC}}To experience the interactivity of the game, visit the {{xkcd|2288|original comic}}!

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Need to finish uploading the few files of loot missing (UPDATE: Only a few are missing!!!) and loot descriptions.}}
This comic is a large draggable image that acted as a shared virtual sandbox for users to interact. Chests are "Items" (small and often humorous images) which could be collected from other comics, and then placed in this image by viewers, but today they are no longer dropped. The collection then updated for all viewers in real-time. Multiples of the same item are often seen. There is a "backpack" at the bottom, similar to backpacks in video games containing items collected by the player. As hinted by the title text, items could be found by visiting different xkcd comics/pages. Randomly, some pages would have a treasure chest which contained the sticker related to the page. The hint would refer to the page which currently had a chest.

The image at the origin is a reference to [[1450: AI-Box Experiment]].

The comic contains 32993 separate images. The sticker images can be seen at xkcd.com/2288/collectors/static/loot/loot_'''XXX'''.png, where XXX is a number from 001 to 253. Additionally, some images can be found at custom URLs, for example the periodic elements can be found at <nowiki>h</nowiki>ttps://xkcd.com/2288/collectors/static/loot/element-'''XX'''.png, where XX is the element, and text loot at xkcd.com/2288/collectors/static/loot/loot-words-'''X'''.png, where X is the sentence. The [https://github.com/xkcd/maple source code] for the comic was released on GitHub.

Placement is limited to 10,000 horizontal units and 5,000 vertical units from the origin. Users received no messages if they try placing something outside the boundary, with a silent fail and the object not being placed. The coordinates are relative to the bottom left corner of the canvas. As the default coordinates are (-370,-277) and the origin is in the center, the displayed portion of the canvas can be found to be twice this in magnitude, 740 x 544 units. The most common image is loot-30.png, which appears 2576 times.

[[File:2288_full.png|100000px|thumb|left|The full image]]{{clear}}

=== Hints ===
For a more minimal list of the stickers found in the comic, see [[2288: Collector's Edition/Stickers]].
{| class="wikitable sortable"
!Sticker
!Hint
!Comic
!Item unlocked
!Notes
|-
|[[File:2288_loot_019.png|50px]]
|Doctors in a row
|[[239: Blagofaire]]
|Cory Doctorow
|These comics all have the same hint, but only one will have the chest
|-
|[[File:2288_loot_246.png|75px]]
|Get out the (US) vote
|Chapter 5 of What If? (New York Style Time Machine)
|Statue of liberty
|
|-
|[[File:2288_loot_126.png|75px]]
|Find a box of nice stuff on a picture with words like these
|[[ 1375: Astronaut Vandalism]]
|Signpost
|
|-
|[[File:2288_loot_228.png|50px]] or [[File:Miniloot-words-dispenser.png|75px]] (maybe incomplete)
|Plug in or find another power source
|[[1373: Screenshot]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:2288_loot_090.png|75px]]
|Sweet dreams, kitty
|[[729: Laser Pointer]] (maybe incomplete)
|Cat licking laser point
|
|-
|[[File:2288_loot_185.png|75px]]
|What is this hint pointing to? Hell if I know.
|[[1052: Every Major's Terrible]]
|2 + lightbulb = boat
|
|-
|[[File:loot 197.png|75px]]
|Somebody set up us the bomb
|[[286: All Your Base]]
|Exploding rock/planet crypton
|
|-
|[[File:loot 175.png|75px]]
|Cowabunga
|[[1412: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]] (maybe incomplete)
|Women Science Fiction Authors
|[[197: Ninja Turtles]] also works
|-
|[[File:loot 210.png|75px]]
|I want to believe
|[[2156: Ufo]]
|Ufo
|
|-
|[[File:loot 044.png|75px]]
|Bleeped
|[[290]], [[398]], [[430]], [[447]], [[533]], [[549]], [[677]], [[724]] or [[1671]]
|*$@#!
|Comics whose titles involve profanities or similar insults.
|-
|[[File:loot 159.png|75px]]
|why waste time say few word when lot word do trick
|[[7]], [[111]], [[139]], [[143]], [[179]], [[217]], [[445]], [[470]], [[822]], [[823]], [[1022]], [[1247]], [[1491]], [[1921]], [[1991]], [[2182]] or [[2231]]
|First Annual Award for Excellence in Being Very Smart
|Comics with titles that are six or more words (with the exception of [[111]], which has five and a spaced dash).
|-
|[[File:loot 006.png|75px]]
|Cooler than electric scooters
|[[139]], [[409]], [[577]], [[578]], [[579]], [[580]] or [[581]]
|An electric skateboard
|
|-
|[[File:loot 095.png|75px]]
|Take it from the top
|[[1: Barrel - Part 1]] (maybe incomplete)
|I am a turtle from [[889: Turtles]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 031.png|75px]]
|I accept the yucca gnocchi, this meal is a success!
|[[1713: 50 ccs]] (maybe incomplete)
|Man carrying parentheses from [[297: Lisp Cycles]]
|
|-
|
|Catch up on the news
|[[1699: Local News]] (maybe incomplete)
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 096.png|75px]]
|Participation trophy
|[[2288: Collector's Edition]] (maybe incomplete)
|Server rack
|
|-
|[[File:loot 161.png|75px]]
|Find an opportunity for a sojourn
|[[665]], [[681]], [[695]], [[1091]], [[1504]], [[1613]], [[1663]] or [[2111]]
|Opportunity Mars rover from [[2111: Opportunity Rover]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 159.png|75px]]
|Tastier than tau day
|[[179: e to the pi times i]] (maybe incomplete)
|First annual award for excellence in being very smart
|Need to find out the difference between this, and the entry below!
|-
|[[File:loot 056.png|75px]]
|Tastier than tau day
|[[235]], [[396]], [[872]], [[1029]], [[1342]], [[1655]] or [[1967]]
|Pie sign
|Published on Pi day
|-
|[[File:loot 216.png|75px]]
|418 I'm a teapot
|[[1866: Russell's Teapot]] (maybe incomplete)
|S.S. NASA: Space is Hard
|
|-
|[[File:loot 205.png|75px]]
|26th September, 1983
|[[2052: Stanislav Petrov Day]]
|White dove
|Might also be written "September 26th, 1983". Locale dependent?
|-
|[[File:loot 151.png|75px]]
|There are 4241 as of Apr 1, 2020
|[[1071: Exoplanets]] (maybe incomplete)
|Little girl from [[2264: Satellite]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 079.png|75px]]
|asableiK
|[[645: RPS]]
|A reverse Polish hotdog
|"Kielbasa" backwards, which is "sausage" in Polish
|-
|[[File:loot 203.png|75px]]
|Critical mass elements
|[[235: Kite]] or [[239: Blagofaire]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 036.png|150x150px]]
|Some Februarys are more equal than others
|[[390: Nightmares]]? (maybe incomplete)
|Cueball wheelie from [[272: Linux User at Best Buy]]
|Comic-hint connection largely conjectural; 390 was the first comic published on a leap day.
|-
|[[File:loot 022.png|150x150px]]
|Five spice
|[[1511: Spice Girl]] or [[1554: Spice Girls]]
|Rock guitarist
|
|-
|[[File:loot 058.png|75px]]
|Call the plumber
|[[423: Finish Line]]
|Luigi in a green Kart
|
|-
|[[File:loot 103.png|150x150px]]
|Was it a rat I saw?
|[[968: Everything]]
|Cueball with a large sack, pulling a wagon
|or [[1503: Squirrel Plan]] for Cueball holding a balloon caught in a ceiling fan.
|-
|[[File:loot 045.png|75px]]
|Churchill's gonna have to seriously rehydrate
|[[346: Diet Coke+Mentos]]
|Bottle of soda
|
|-
|
|Keep coming back
|
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 235.png|75px]]
|A new model released each year
|Triggered by visiting all xkcd phone comics in order
|Phone screaming "Noooo"
|
|-
|[[File:loot 232.png|75px]]
|Tea Time
|From the ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' article ''{{what if|79|Lake Tea}}''.
|All our tea
|Not technically from a comic
|-
|[[File:loot 092.png|75px]]
|Try pattern-matching! Look for comic 'bout alphabet?
|[[1045: Constraints]]
|Two Tetris blocks
|
|-
|[[File:loot 021.png|75px]]
|Where's Hilbert?
|[[195: Map of the Internet]] (maybe incomplete)
|Hilbert Curve
|
|-
|[[File:loot 202.png|75px]]
|Science fiction fetish
|[[1585: Similarities]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 250.png|75px]] / [[File:loot 067.png|75px]]
|The first one was funnier
|[[11: Barrel - Part 2]] (maybe incomplete)
|Falling feather / Sign "The uncomfortable truths well"
|
|-
|[[File:loot 127.png|75px]]
|It's up to over 260 million cycles!
|[[1941: Dying Gift]]
|Megan on a tire swing
|
|-
|[[File:loot 163.png|75px]]
|Sleeping Beauty is the same everywhere though
|[[2233: Aurora Meaning]] (maybe incomplete)
|Sleeping Cat
|
|-
|[[File:loot 191.png|75px]]
|On the internet, nobody knows you're an arachnid
|[[1530: Keyboard Mash]] (maybe incomplete)
|Cobwebbed frame from [[1135: Arachnoneurology]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 152.png|75px]]
|Did James Cameron pay for the rice cooker too?
|[[1598: Salvage]] (maybe incomplete)
|Rice bowl
|
|-
|[[File:loot 010.png|75px]]
|Never going to give you up
|[[351]], [[389]], [[396]], [[524]], [[573]], [[609]], [[802]], [[1212]], [[1757]] or [[1981]]
|Cueball in car listening to music
|
|-
|[[File:loot 247.png|75px]]
|If red touches yellow, that's 24 ohms
|[[1604: Snakes]], [[227: Color Codes]]? (maybe incomplete)
|Yoda with an mp3 player from What If
|
|-
|[[File:loot 115.png|75px]]
|An enthusiastic but questionable business opportunity
|[[1021]], [[1032]], [[1117]], [[1293]], [[1493]], [[1533]], [[1772]], [[1812]], [[1871]], [[1903]], [[1997]], [[2140]], [[2209]] or [[2277]]
|Beret guy with a goat on leash
|
|-
|Multiple: loot_106.png, miniloot-words-hair.png, miniloot-words-ominous.png, miniloot-words-eruption.png, miniloot-words-flying.png or miniloot-words-ghost.png (maybe incomplete)
|Read the fine manual
|[[293]], [[434]], [[456]], [[912]], [[1343]] or [[1692]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 209.png|75px]]
|That thing's undecimodal!
|[[1347: t Distribution]] (maybe incomplete)
|Floating tentacled alien
|
|-
|[[File:loot 253.png|75px]]
|Actually, it's Myanmar-Shave now
|[[491: Twitter]] (maybe incomplete)
|Expensive bottle
|
|-
|[[File:loot 002.png|75px]]
|You don't have to find all 99
|[[121: Balloon]] (maybe incomplete)
|Balloon copter
|Or [[51: Malaria]] ?
|-
|[[File:loot 098.png|75px]]
|Going in circles
|[[378: Real Programmers]] (maybe incomplete)
|Cueball spinning in desk chair
|
|-
|[[File:loot 158.png|75px]]
|Couldn't you try knitting, or maybe stamp collecting?
|[[37]], [[53]], [[60]], [[75]], [[79]], [[148]], [[168]], [[174]], [[236]], [[259]], [[287]], [[296]], [[326]], [[331]], [[389]], [[437]], [[451]], [[559]], [[590]], [[605]], [[687]], [[719]], [[733]], [[790]], [[845]], [[966]], [[1004]], [[1119]], [[1145]], [[1169]], [[1208]], [[1278]], [[1304]], [[1329]], [[1340]], [[1355]], [[1405]], [[1480]], [[1546]], [[1598]], [[1677]], [[1697]], [[1705]], [[1788]], [[1795]], [[1960]], [[1995]], [[2032]], [[2123]], [[2208]] or [[2252]]
|Phishing License sign
|Mostly comics that include "My hobby:"
|-
|[[File:loot 069.png|75px]]
|It's the ciiiiircle of HONK
|[[537: Ducklings]] or [[1729: Migrating Geese]]
|DUCKLOOP'D?
|
|-
|[[File:loot 033.png|75px]]
|Fool me twice
|Maybe [[292: goto]]? Need confirmation.
|Raptor Attack
|The second April Fools' Day comic
|-
|
|oOOOoooo
|Maybe [[316: Loud Sex]]? Need confirmation.
|Sleeping cat
|
|-
|[[File:loot 004.png|75px]]
|Maybe we can ask for new wishes
|[[879: Lamp]]
|Genie and his bottle
|If you place the genie last, you get another genie (indefinitely) - Needs verification, this may also just be a bug!
|-
|[[File:loot 130.png|75px]]
|HACK THE PLANET
|[[1337: Hack]] (maybe incomplete)
|Crash and Burn in the pool from the end of ''Hackers''
|
|-
|[[File:loot 162.png]]
|Monetization haute couteur
|[[20]], [[23]], [[55]], [[123]], [[149]], [[150]], [[162]], [[208]], [[231]], [[242]], [[256]], [[273]], [[285]], [[303]], [[327]], [[377]], [[386]], [[420]], [[435]], [[442]], [[482]], [[505]], [[552]], [[556]], [[585]], [[614]], [[627]], [[657]], [[681]], [[688]], [[705]], [[710]], [[802]], [[821]], [[980]], [[1033]], [[1040]], [[1079]], [[1127]], [[1133]], [[1196]], [[1298]] or [[1428]] (maybe false positives)
|Two bags of money
|
|-
|[[File:miniloot-words-eater.png|75px]](maybe incomplete)
|Maybe writing a script would help
|[[1319: Automation]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 245.png|75px]]
|Go big to go small
|[[1365: Inflation]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 237.png|75px]]
|Are you projecting
|[[850]], [[977]], [[1500]], [[1784]], [[1799]], [[2242]] or [[2256]]
|Squirrel on a gun
|
|-
|[[File:loot 007.png|75px]]
|Do spiders really have six legs
|[[8]], [[43]], [[126]], [[427]], [[442]] or [[1110]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 071.png|75px]]
|Istanbul or Constantinople or St. Trimble's Island?
|[[1688: Map Age Guide]]
|Cephalopod
|
|-
|[[File:loot 037.png|75px]]
|Another rulebook?
|[[393: Ultimate Game]]
|Merlin in a chair from [[270: Merlin]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 192.png|75px]]
|Moooooon
|[[482]], [[681]], [[1276]], [[1291]], [[1300]], [[1389]], [[1458]], [[1515]], [[1633]], [[1738]], [[1878]] or [[2258]]
|MOOOOOON
|
|-
|[[File:loot 049.png|75px]]
|Take a flight from LOL to FFS
|[[1937: IATA Airport Abbreviations]]
|
|
|-
|
|Everyone deserves a second chnace
|All comics searched, no matches
|
|The misspelling is intentional. [[745: Dyslexics]] would have been a good fit
|-
|[[File:loot 035.png|75px]]
|Community contribution
|[[822]], [[823]], [[824]], [[825]], [[826]]
|[Citation Needed] protester from [[285: Wikipedian Protester]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 154.png|75px]]
|On the other side of the wardrobe
|[[665: Prudence]], [[969: Delta-P]] or [[2218: Wardrobe]] (maybe incomplete)
|Authentic Reindeer pulling sled from [[1776: Reindeer]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 105.png|75px]]
|Today's your lucky day
|[[1053: Ten Thousand]] (maybe incomplete)
|Ms. Frizzle
|
|-
|[[File:loot 038.png|75px]]
|[This hint has been redacted due to a copyright claim]
|[[1005: SOPA]]
|The tape
|
|-
|loot_times.png or loot_div.png (maybe incomplete)
|Try a different approach
|[[55: Useless]] (maybe incomplete)
|Equals sign
|
|-
|[[File:loot 144.png|75px]]
|The cake is a lie!
|[[606: Cutting Edge]]
|Cake
|
|-
|[[File:loot 026.png|75px]]
|Joanna, fire.
|[[322: Pix Plz]]
|Joanna with EMP cannon
|
|-
|
|Everything changes from time to time when the fire nation attacks
|[[965: Elements]]
|Symposium
|
|-
|[[File:loot 041.png|75px]]
|90KG x 300M
|[[382: Trebuchet]]
|Trebuchet
|
|-
|[[File:loot 046.png|75px]]
|Copyright Enforcement Brigade
|[[344: 1337: Part 4]]
|
|
|-
|[[File:loot 128.png|75px]]
|Where Cape Town meets Chukotka
|[[1500: Upside-Down Map]]
|Crater
|
|-
|[[File:loot 005.png|75px]]
|Take a ride in a barrel
|View all five barrel comics in reverse order ([[31]], [[25]], [[22]], [[11]], [[1]])
|Cueball at the door to the playpen-ball-filled apartment from [[150: Grownups]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 030.png|75px]]
|Compiling...
|[[303: Compiling]]
|Two Cueballs fighting with swords while on chairs
|
|-
|[[File:loot 109.png|75px]]
|
|[[2288: Collector's Edition]]
|Sheeple eye from [[1013: Wake Up Sheeple]]
|
|-
|[[File:loot 167.png|75px]]
|
|[[2288: Collector's Edition]]
|Time machine from [[1747: Spider Paleontology]]
|
|}

==Transcript==

:[Cueball stands to the left of a vibrating box.]
:[The words "Collector's Edition" are written above him and boxed.]

==Trivia==
*This comic is the 2020 April Fools' Day comic and was supposed to be released on Wednesday, April 1st. However, it did not go live until Friday, April 3. Meanwhile, Friday's comic, [[2289: Scenario 4]], was published a day later for a [[2289: Scenario 4#Trivia|very rare Saturday release]]. The message below was displayed on the [[Header text|header text]] of the site from Wednesday until the comic finally went live:
:<blockquote>Note: For technical reasons Wednesday's comic will be posted Thursday instead. Apologies for the delay!</blockquote>
:This is one of the few comics released four days after the previous one. The last time this occurred was [[2224: Software Updates]].
*On [[unixkcd]], [https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/collectors_edition.png this image] is displayed when you try to display this comic.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Interactive comics]]
[[Category:Dynamic comics]]
[[Category:Giraffes]]
[[Category:Comics with cursed items]]
[[Category:Animals]]
[[Category:Turtles]]
[[Category:Comics with custom header texts]]

Mrs. Roberts

2026-06-05T14:31:07Z

FaviFake: eels unnecessary now that shes renamed

{{Infobox character
| image = mrs roberts.png
| imagesize = 200px
| caption = '
| first_appearance = [[327: Exploits of a Mom]]
}}

<noinclude>:''For a list of comics, see [[:Category:Comics featuring Mrs. Roberts|Comics featuring Mrs. Roberts]].''
:''For Mrs. Roberts' daughter, see [[Elaine Roberts]].''
:''For Mrs. Roberts' son, see [[Little Bobby Tables]].''</noinclude>

'''Mrs. Roberts''' is a [[stick figure]] character in [[xkcd]]. She is an exceptionally skilled hacker, although her daughter, usually named [[Elaine Roberts]], surpasses her in expertise. With her WiFi network, Mrs. Roberts can manually modify {{w|Transmission Control Protocol|TCP}} streams of her neighbors, disrupting their secure tunnel connections. Mrs. Roberts also has a son, nicknamed [[Little Bobby Tables]].

She has white hair of shoulder length and is a blond woman similar to [[Miss Lenhart]]. Like Miss Lenhart, she is depicted as a mom.

{{navbox-characters}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Minor characters]]

135: Substitute

2026-05-30T11:38:48Z

FaviFake: that's a cueball

{{comic
| number = 135
| date = July 31, 2006
| title = Substitute
| image = substitute.png
| titletext = YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?
}}

==Explanation==
This comic refers to the film ''{{w|Jurassic Park (film)|Jurassic Park}}'', a 1993 movie based on the 1990 novel by {{w|Michael Crichton}}. The film centers around a billionaire who bought an island and opened a zoo or theme park for dinosaurs that he has cloned from DNA recovered from blood found in fossilized mosquitoes. After a computer programmer shuts down the security systems to steal embryos for a rival company, several of the creatures, among which are the {{w|velociraptor}}s subject of this comic, run loose and try to devour every human in the theme park.

Velociraptors (often shortened to "raptors") are a species of relatively small, carnivorous {{w|dinosaur}} that play a central role in the original film, as well as its sequels. In the film, packs of Velociraptors antagonize the main characters at various points, even entering buildings. According to newer researches, the Velociraptors in the film were erroneously based on the {{w|Utahraptor}} species of dinosaur. Unlike the movie, in which they are depicted as having a reptilian skin, both species of dinosaur in reality are theorized to have been feathered. The word "raptor" also refers to modern {{w|Bird of prey|birds of prey}}.

[[Randall Munroe|Randall]] is asked to substitute for [[Miss Lenhart]] in math class. The first page of the test he devises contains three questions, which have the recurring theme of humans running from said velociraptors. For the answers, see below. As Randall says in the comic: "This material is more vital than anything you've ever learned," the joke being that Randall is somehow fearful that such a thing could happen. Velociraptors, and in particular, the irrational fear of being attacked by them in the modern world, [[:Category:Velociraptors|appear several times]] in [[xkcd]]. This is the second such instance; the first is [[87: Velociraptors]].

Answers to the first two questions [http://fora.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=120&start=40 used to be found] on the forum board, until it was shut down. The link is now defunct, but there's an [https://web.archive.org/web/20150326152959/http://fora.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=120&start=40 archived version]:
*The first is 37.30 meters.
*If the raptors at each instant move towards the current position of the person, the second answer is 57.19 degrees to either side of the wounded raptor.
*If the raptors' trajectories are optimal for catching the person as quickly as possible, the second answer is 59.83 degrees to either side of the wounded raptor.

In the title text, Randall asks the kids whether they find this possibility humorous (and they rightfully should, considering that the chances of such a thing occurring are astronomically low).{{cn}}

==Transcript==
:[In a classroom, the board says "Math" on the top-left corner, and "Mr. Munroe" in the middle. A Cueball portrays Randall, standing in front of it, speaking to the class.]
:Randall: Miss Lenhart couldn't be here today, so she asked me to substitute.
:Randall: I've put out your tests. Please get started.

:[A Kidball student in the first row raises the exam paper and says:]
:Kidball: Mr. Munroe, Miss Lenhart never taught us this.

:Randall: That's because Miss Lenhart doesn't understand how important certain kinds of math are.
:Kidball: But this just looks--
:Randall: This material is more vital than anything you've ever learned
:Kidball: But--
:Randall: No buts.

:Randall: This is a matter of life and death.

:[Excerpt from the exam paper.]
:<tt>Name: _________</tt>

:[A stick figure is standing, hands over head. A velociraptor is running towards it.]

:<tt>1. The velociraptor spots you 40 meters away and attacks, accelerating at 4 m/s^2 to its top speed of 25 m/s. When it spots you, you begin to flee, quickly reaching your top speed of 6 m/s. How far can you get before you're caught and devoured?</tt>

:<tt>2. You're at the center of a 20m equilateral triangle with a raptor at each corner. The top raptor has a wounded leg and is limited to a top speed of 10 m/s.</tt>

:[A stick figure is shown in the above situation. The picture has a legend "<tt>(Not to scale).</tt>"]

:<tt>The raptors will run toward you. At what angle should you run to maximize the time you stay alive?</tt>

:<tt>3. Raptors can open doors, but they are slowed by them. Using the floor plan on the next page, plot a route through the building, assuming raptors take 5 minutes to open the first door and halve the time for each subsequent door. Remember, raptors run at 10 m/s and they do not know fear.</tt>

==Trivia==
This is the second xkcd comic featuring [[Miss Lenhart]] and the first comic to give her a name, "Miss Lenhart".

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Miss Lenhart]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Randall Munroe]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Velociraptors]]
[[Category:Jurassic Park]]
[[Category:Math]]
[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Kidball]]
[[Category:Comics with a Spanish translation]]

explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals

2026-05-30T10:38:40Z

FaviFake:

<noinclude>{{Community links}}

{|-
|valign="top" width="100%"|[[File:Crystal Clear app ktip.png|left|120px]] <big><big><b>Proposals</b></big></big>

<i>Place for ideas and suggestions to improve the wiki's design and organization on general issues can be<br>incubated for later submission for consensus discussion. Be sure to check whether your proposal has already been submitted. </i>{{AddNewSection|Page=Explain XKCD:Community portal/Proposals|Text=<small>(+post)</small>}}
|}</noinclude>

==ARCHIVED DISCUSSIONS==
<div class="plainlinks" style="background:#edf6ff; border:1px solid #a7d7f9; margin:1em auto 1em auto; width:100%; font-size: 120%; padding: 0.5ex; text-align: center;">Most of the discussions on this page have been archived. The archive is available at '''[[explain xkcd talk:Community portal/Proposals]]'''.</div>

== Removing unnecessary 3-comic categories? ==

I count eight categories on explainxkcd that satisfy the following properties: 1. They have only three comics in them. 2. They aren't really a comic series; they just feature or reference a comic theme. 3. They aren't Featuring some person or character. In short, they seem to have no real reason to exist. (They're [[:Category:Spice_Girls|t]][[:Category:Wind_turbine|h]]e[[:Category:Ender%27s_Game|s]]o[[:Category:FernGully|n]][[:Category:Giraffes|e]]s.) So my proposal: remove them. -[[User:Account|Account]] ([[User talk:Account|talk]]) 20:37, 9 November 2019 (UTC)
:In addition, there are [[:Category:Sketches|t]][[:Category:BSD|h]][[:Category:Emacs|i]][[:Category:Identity_Theft|r]][[:Category:Katamari_Damacy|t]][[:Category:Super_Bowl|e]][[:Category:The_Matrix|e]][[:Category:Tournament_bracket|n]][[:Category:Traffic_light| ]][[:Category:Trebuchet|m]][[:Category:Wingsuit|o]][[:Category:Euler_diagrams|r]][[:Category:Pedantic|e]] four-comic categories that also seem rather in need of deletion.
:: Shouldn't the community at least have some time to expand on these categories, in case they're currently incomplete? For example, [[:Category:The Matrix]] is on your list and now contains 7 strips, and [[:Category:Tournament bracket]] got its 5th entry after your post. Even if they're not, a theme category can save some typing in the search box (and is probably also cheaper in terms of server resources than all the searches it'll eliminate). [[User:Promethean|Promethean]] ([[User talk:Promethean|talk]]) 22:43, 21 November 2019 (UTC)
:::So what do you think the limit should be for categories? Should we create a category when two comics mention the same topic? Three? --[[User:Account|Account]] ([[User talk:Account|talk]]) 16:28, 22 November 2019 (UTC)
::::Three seems reasonable to me, and I could see a case being made for two. Categories aren't expensive. [[User:Promethean|Promethean]] ([[User talk:Promethean|talk]]) 00:17, 23 November 2019 (UTC)

::::Three is only good when it's a series. If it's not a series, it should be 5 or 6 comics. We have too many categories. [[User:YZ100]] 23:07, 6 May 2026 (UTC)

== New transcript ==

The transcripts in the comic pages are quite inconsistent, especially in the brackets where you have to describe what happens in the panels. If I understand correctly, the transcripts are for people to copy the text in the comic without having to type them out. If that's the case, then I think propose a new transcript. This transcript should have the comic with the words erased, and then the copy-pasteable words on top of that. Such a transcript would have no room for error, which would let anyone contribute to a seamless transcript.
:The aim of the transcript is to provide a text-only version of the comic that would allow someone who is visually impaired to use a text-to-speech converter to understand the comic and also in a machine readable format for searching (see the [[explain_xkcd:Editor_FAQ#What_is_the_format_of_the_transcript_section?|Editor FAQ]]). Anything using mark-up, images or anything other than plain text will interfere with this and so should be avoided in the transcript. [[User:A(l)Chemist|AlChemist]] ([[User talk:A(l)Chemist|talk]]) 18:22, 23 November 2019 (UTC)User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al

== Add title text and heading to transcript section ==

It has always bothered me that the transcript did not include the title text since it contributes so much to the humor of the comics. Also, it looks to me like the comic heading is sometimes included as part of the transcript and sometimes left out. I checked the previous proposals and did not see any discussion of these issues. Please consider having a policy going forward of including the heading and the title text within the transcript. [[User:Rtanenbaum|Rtanenbaum]] ([[User talk:Rtanenbaum|talk]]) 22:43, 1 January 2020 (UTC)
:To my understanding (and also others, see discussion directly above) one of the main points of the transcript is to make the comics searchable, the other is, to make it readable when images are not an option. In both cases the comic's name and the title text mentioned above and below the image should be sufficient. I personally think this convention is fine. [[User:Lupo|Lupo]] ([[User talk:Lupo|talk]]) 08:28, 2 January 2020 (UTC)

::Pardon me -- (and, '''<big>''thanks'' for your patience</big>''') -- if this is too off-topic (/slash "boring") or [[wikt:TMI|TMI]] (see {{w|Information overload#Web accuracy}} e.g.), '''...OR''' if this should have been posted elsewhere ...instead of here.

::IMHO the term '''"title text"''' is a misnomer. I think the term is used to refer to the little (or, '''BIG!''') pop-up -- (kinda like what is sometimes called a <code>"tooltip"</code>, but ... aren't those usually pretty '''small?''') -- that appears when one "hovers" his mouse [pointer] over an XKCD cartoon. ...at least, according to '''the "Talk:" page section''' [[Template talk:comic#The template field called .22titletext.22]] which was added almost 3 years ago. I think that calling it a <code>"BONUS text"</code> would be even better than calling it a "caption". However, [to me], '''either one''' of those terms would make sense ''WAY'' more than calling it a '''"title text"''' ... for reasons which are stated in the [Template] "Talk:" page section mentioned (and ... '''LINKED TO''') above.<br/>'''<big>Any Comments? . . ''' *** Thanks! *** for listening!</big> --[[User:Mike Schwartz|Mike Schwartz]] ([[User talk:Mike Schwartz|talk]]) 08:57, 7 April 2020 (UTC)

:::Hi Mike, I see your point, and yes, something like "bonus text" might be a bit more descriptive. But FWIW, I think the reason it's called "title text" is because that's the text that appears in the <code>[https://www.w3schools.com/tags/att_global_title.asp title]</code> attribute of the HTML <code>[https://www.w3schools.com/tags/tag_img.asp <img>]</code> tag of the comic's image on the xkcd.com site. For example, at https://xkcd.com/2364/, the code for the comic image looks like this:
<pre>
<img src="//imgs.xkcd.com/comics/parity_conservation.png"
title="Bloody Mary is made of antimatter. It explains so much."
alt="Parity Conservation"
srcset="//imgs.xkcd.com/comics/parity_conservation_2x.png 2x">
</pre>
:::In there, you can see the title text as <code>title="Bloody Mary is made of antimatter. It explains so much."</code> See [[title text|here]] for more explanation about that, and some discussions about it [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Miscellaneous#Common mistake|here]]. – [[User:Yfmcpxpj|Yfmcpxpj]] ([[User talk:Yfmcpxpj|talk]]) 03:11, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
::: While the current layout suits the first purpose (ease of search), I would argue that having the "title text" come before in the page layout, and in a completely different section, makes it fail the second (accessibility). Often the contents of the title text are a continuation of the humour in the strip, so it's about as useful as having the explanation ahead of the transcript as far as accessibility is concerned. My suggestion on this matter is to either a) move the transcript to the top of the content, maybe within a collapse section or b) not claim it for accessibility.
::: As for the secondary topic, I've seen it called "Author Text" before, as it is text by the author and most people won't care what the element attribute is named. [[Special:Contributions/64.114.211.89|64.114.211.89]] 06:55, 18 November 2025 (UTC)

== Wikipedia links. ==

I think the links to Wikipedia should have symbols, so it's not confusing which ones lead to other comic pages.

== It's time to remove the HTTPS lock icon ==

Explainxkcd should do the same thing that browser makers have done: treat HTTPS as the modern standard, and mark HTTP as the deviation instead.

Here are appropriate replacement icons:
* https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Unlock_Icon_Red_(32_bit).png
* https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Unlock_Icon_Red_(4_bit).gif
- [[User:Frankie|Frankie]] ([[User talk:Frankie|talk]]) 12:49, 16 May 2020 (UTC)

== New page for Randall's regular column in the New York Times ==
Randall Munroe has been writing and illustrating a monthly science column in the New York Times. I suggest a page in this Wiki, indexing those columns. For some reason the New York Times itself does not provide such an index. If they ever do add one, we would still have a topic article here, similar to the one we have for the What If blog, that could link to their index. --[[User:JohnB|JohnB]] ([[User talk:JohnB|talk]]) 00:47, 11 June 2020 (UTC)
------
=== New York Times column: Good Question ===

'''Good Question''' is a more-or-less monthly column written and illustrated by '''[[Randall|Randall Munroe]]''' in the '''[https://www.nytimes.com/section/science Science section of the New York Times]''', beginning in November 2019. The columns give serious answers to science questions, in Munroe's inimitable style.

The New York Times website ordinarily requires registration, and its content is always protected by copyright. Most particularly it is ''not'' under [http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.5/ Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 2.5 License] the way [[xkcd]] is. The good news: anyone can register for a free digital subscription to the New York Times, with access to 'recent' Science articles among some others, but outside of that only five articles per month. See [https://archive.nytimes.com/www.nytimes.com/info/help/freesearch.html Free Articles].

Unlike for many of their other regular columnists, the New York Times does not provide a clickable link either on the byline '''Randall Munroe''' or on the column title '''Good Question'''. The following tables are intended to correct that omission.

{| class="wikitable"
|+ New York Times columns ''by'' Randall Munroe
! Column !! Headline !! Byline !! Date
|-
! SCIENCE
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/13/science/what-makes-a-red-sky-at-night-and-at-morning.html What Makes a Red Sky at Night (and at Morning)]
| Randall Munroe
| Aug. 13, 2019
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/12/science/randall-munroe-moon.html If I Touched the Moon, What Would It Feel Like?]
| Randall Munroe
| Nov. 12, 2019
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://nytimes.com/2019/12/10/science/earth-size-mass.html Is Earth Getting Bigger Over Time?]
| Randall Munroe
| Dec. 10, 2019
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/01/21/science/human-running-speed-quadruped.html How Fast Can a Human Run?]
| Randall Munroe
| Jan. 21, 2020 / Feb. 7, 2020
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/17/science/worst-odor-smell-thioacetone.html What’s the World’s Worst Smell?]
| Randall Munroe
| Feb. 17, 2020 / Feb. 26, 2020
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://nytimes.com/2020/03/10/science/question-randall-munroe-bobsled-gravity.html What if Galileo Had Dropped Bobsleds From the Tower of Pisa?]
| Randall Munroe
| March 10, 2020
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/07/science/pulsar-xkcd-munroe-stars.html How’s the View From a Spinning Star?]
| Randall Munroe
| April 7, 2020
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/05/11/science/traffic-barrier-rice-krispies.html What’s the Sweetest, Crispiest Way to Stay Safe in a Car Crash?]
| Randall Munroe
| May 11, 2020
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/06/09/science/randall-munroe-question-eggs.html Can You Boil an Egg Too Long?]
| Randall Munroe
| June 9, 2020
|-
! GOOD QUESTION
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/07/science/neutrinos-snowball-randall-munroe.html Could You Make a Snowball of Neutrinos?]
| Randall Munroe
| July 7, 2020
|}

{| class="wikitable"
|+ New York Times columns ''about'' Randall Munroe
! Column !! Headline !! Byline !! Date
|-
! LINK BY LINK
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/26/business/media/26link.html This Is Funny Only if You Know Unix]
| Noam Cohen
| May 26, 2008
|-
! BITS
| [https://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/03/14/techs-favorite-cartoonist-enters-mainstream-publishing/ Tech’s Favorite Cartoonist Enters Mainstream Publishing]
| Noam Cohen
| March 14, 2014
|-
! SCIENCE
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/04/science/randall-munroe-the-creator-of-xkcd-explains-complexity-through-absurdity.html He’s Glad You Asked]
| Kenneth Chang
| Nov. 3, 2014
|-
! BOOKS
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/24/books/randall-munroe-explains-it-all-for-us.html Randall Munroe Explains It All for Us]
| Alexandra Alter
| Nov. 23, 2015
|-
! SCIENCE
| [https://www.nytimes.com/2016/03/22/science/randall-munroe-xkcd-science-textbook.html Randall Munroe, XKCD Creator, Goes Back to High School]
| Kenneth Chang
| March 21, 2016
|-
! SCIENCE
| [https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/03/18/science/document-Munroepages.html Randall Munroe of ‘XKCD’ Explains the Human Body, Elevators and the Saturn 5]
| (Actual pages from '''{{w|Thing_Explainer|Thing Explainer}}''')
| March 21, 2016
|}
------

: Looks goods to me, you should probably make that an article of its own, maybe [[New York Times: Good Question]]? --[[User:SlashMe|SlashMe]] ([[User talk:SlashMe|talk]]) 22:58, 10 July 2020 (UTC)

: {{notice|I went and added the page, here: [[New York Times: Good Question]] --[[User:JohnB|JohnB]] ([[User talk:JohnB|talk]]) 02:42, 11 July 2020 (UTC)}}

== Bring back the {{rw}} template! please ==

Can someone restore the <nowiki>{{rw}}</nowiki> template? I insist on its existence. I further assure that it will be of much use. It was deleted by an admin. <span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 06:10, 29 September 2020 (UTC)
:nm, did it myself.<span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 04:15, 1 October 2020 (UTC)

== Link to high-resolution images? ==

The wiki includes the "standard" resolution images, but would it be worth adding a link to the higher-resolution image on each page? It appears that this could be automated in at least a strong majority of cases: if the standard image is ''xyzzy.png'', the hi-res one is ''xyzzy'''_2x'''.png'' . [[User:BunsenH|BunsenH]] ([[User talk:BunsenH|talk]]) 22:10, 1 October 2020 (UTC)
:Please stop adding this to the explanations. This is not needed. [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 08:56, 6 October 2020 (UTC)
::The high-resolution image was quite useful in parsing the "Amelia's Farm Fresh Cookies" comic. I'm not convinced that the hi-res images are commonly known. I've been reading xkcd for about 7 years and hadn't heard about them until I stumbled across a mention of them in one of the Discussions here. What is the harm in having a one-line ''link'' here? -- not, I emphasize, the actual image, which would take up a great deal of space. [[User:BunsenH|BunsenH]] ([[User talk:BunsenH|talk]]) 17:00, 7 October 2020 (UTC)
:::I didn't know about the high-resolution images either. While it might be a bit repetitive to add a full sentence to every comic's explanation, I agree that having ''some'' easy way to link to the hi-res image on xkcd.com could be handy. For example, maybe a "hi-res" or "2x" button before the "Next >" button above the comic in [[Template:comic]]? That's a bit extreme, but I added an example template, derived from the existing [[Template:comic]], to demonstrate how that could work:
:::* Template: [[User:Yfmcpxpj/Template:comic 2x test]]
:::* Demo: [[User:Yfmcpxpj/Sandbox#2x comic template test]]
:::With those changes to the template, for all comics as of [[1084]] the "2x" button would automatically appear. (No need to go back and change all comics.) This assumes the images hosted on explainxkcd generally have the same filename as on xkcd.com, but there are optional parameters to override the filename or omit the "2x" button altogether for specific exceptions. I'm not suggesting we actually go ahead and implement this; but if there was enough interest, an admin would be needed anyway, to make the changes within [[Template:comic]], which is currently protected. – [[User:Yfmcpxpj|Yfmcpxpj]] ([[User talk:Yfmcpxpj|talk]]) 23:25, 11 October 2020 (UTC)
::::FWIW, I like this. [[User:BunsenH|BunsenH]] ([[User talk:BunsenH|talk]]) 20:25, 12 October 2020 (UTC)
:::::My proposal is that a bot should add it automatically to the description of each comic image when available so that it does not take up space anywhere and is easily accessible.<span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 13:49, 8 February 2021 (UTC)

== Proposal to replace the top section with this... ==

I have come up with a new design for the top section of all community portals...
It’s located here... https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=explain_xkcd:Sandbox&oldid=199882 <span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 14:15, 15 October 2020 (UTC)
<hr/>
{|-
|valign="top" width="80%"|[[File:Crystal Clear app ktip.png|left|120px]] <big><big><b>Proposals</b></big></big>

<i>Ideas to improve the wiki's design and organization can be added here.</i> {{AddNewSection|Page=Explain XKCD:Community portal/Proposals|Text=<small>(+post)</small>}}

|valign="top" xalign="right" width="100%"|[[File:Crystal Clear app package settings blue.png|50px|link=https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Technical]][[File:Crystal Clear teamwork.png|50px|link=https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Coordination]][[File:Mop.svg|50px|link=https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Admin_requests]][[File:Internet-group-chat.svg|50px|link=https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Miscellaneous]]
|}

== I made a template for welcoming new users. ==

{{Welcome}}
<hr/>
Any ideas? Suggestions? Objections?<span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 16:35, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
: this is now in at the top of the Main Page --[[User:Jeff|<b><font color="orange">Jeff</font></b>]] ([[User talk:Jeff|talk]]) 16:38, 5 February 2021 (UTC)
::Why? This looks like a template intended for (newly created) UserPages. And it replaces interesting data from the frontpage with something not useful for casual visitors (or even non-casual lurkers). I'd undo this change in an instant if I had authority to do so. ((The template looks good, to clarify, just obviously not intended to be in that location.)) [[Special:Contributions/141.101.76.154|141.101.76.154]] 01:36, 6 February 2021 (UTC)
:::[[User: Jeff|Jeff]] is the owner of explainxkcd you dingus. <span style="text-shadow:0 0 7px black">[[User:Beanie|<span style="font-size:11pt;color:#dddddd">Beanie</span>]]</span> <sup><span style="text-shadow:0 0 4px #000000">[[User talk:Beanie|<span style="font-size:8pt;color:#dddddd">talk</span>]]</span></sup> 13:46, 18 June 2021 (UTC)

== comic groups ==

i think we should have a tech problems list of comics ( as there are quite a few)
:We already have a category for it. [[:Category:Cueball_Computer_Problems]].<span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 13:44, 8 February 2021 (UTC)

== Archiving interactive comics? ==

Has the possibility of archiving interactive comics been discussed? Of course, users can view them on the original website, but it’d be nice to have a working backup of sorts, especially considering some of the interactive comics haven’t aged too well in terms of compatibility or support (e.g. Umwelt displays a blank page for me.)

It probably wouldn’t be possible to do so directly from mediawiki, but I’d be happy to experiment with cloning a few of them on another server, or as simple PHP pages that could be embedded, if it would help. Most of the interactive comics appear to be implemented mostly in client side JS anyways, so replicating them shouldn’t be too bad.

[[User:Tague|Tague]] ([[User talk:Tague|talk]]) 13:12, 29 April 2021 (UTC)

== Replace head shots of characters in the wiki with these new and high quality head shots! ==

https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/n2u28r/i_took_head_shots_of_the_reccuring_characters_and/

These are not only upscaled, but are all squares and have all the features of the characters.<span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 03:33, 2 May 2021 (UTC)
:I think you should do it (because higher quality = better) :] <span style="text-shadow:0 0 7px black">[[User:Beanie|<span style="font-size:11pt;color:#dddddd">Beanie</span>]]</span> <sup><span style="text-shadow:0 0 4px #000000">[[User talk:Beanie|<span style="font-size:8pt;color:#dddddd">talk</span>]]</span></sup> 13:42, 18 June 2021 (UTC)
::There seemed to be no objections, so I went ahead and did it.<span> — [[User:Sqrt-1|The <b>𝗦𝗾𝗿𝘁-𝟭</b>]] <sup>[[User talk:Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">talk</span>]] [[Special:Contributions/Sqrt-1|<span style="color: blue">stalk</span>]]</sup></span> 12:40, 21 November 2021 (UTC)

== Cleaning up [[Special:WantedTemplates|Special: Wanted Templates]] ==

I decided to take a look at the list of wanted templates. Imagine my surprise when I see that a lot of the templates wanted were mis-capitalizations or misspellings of existing templates. I hereby request permission to create redirect pages for some of the most popular errors.
I intend to do five, wait a week, and do another five as to not spam the wiki. I will not begin for a week, at which point I will only proceed if nobody has said no OR a moderator has said yes. May I proceed? [[User talk:Quillathe Siannodel|<sup>{)|(}</sup>]][[User:Quillathe_Siannodel|Quill]][[Special:Contributions/Quillathe_Siannodel|<sub>{)|(}</sub>]] 11:34, 15 May 2021 (UTC)

== Knit Cap ==
Sometimes Knit cap has long hair, sometimes short. Is Knit Cap meant to be a male character that sometimes has long hair, or is Knit Cap sometimes female? I want to clear this up before I finish editing [[1350: Lorenz]]. <span style="text-shadow:0 0 7px black">[[User:Beanie|<span style="font-size:11pt;color:#dddddd">Beanie</span>]]</span> <sup><span style="text-shadow:0 0 4px #000000">[[User talk:Beanie|<span style="font-size:8pt;color:#dddddd">talk</span>]]</span></sup> 13:40, 18 June 2021 (UTC)
:Hm, in the 'Enemy Pikachu used theft' scene in [[1350: Lorenz]], Knit Cap's hair looks merely slightly unkempt. From this, I will assume that Knit Cap just sometimes has long hair and is always male. <span style="text-shadow:0 0 6px black">[[User:Beanie|<span style="font-size:11pt;color:#dddddd">Beanie</span>]]</span> <sup><span style="text-shadow:0 0 3px #000000">[[User talk:Beanie|<span style="font-size:8pt;color:#dddddd">talk</span>]]</span></sup> 13:10, 21 June 2021 (UTC)
::Ok, the official transcripts say that Knit Cap is 'A guy in a knit cap'. I will take that to mean that Knit Cap is definitely male.
:::(Sorry for necroposting) Knit cap is shown to represent Randall's wife in the "X years" series, I assume that they are thusly female. {{unsigned|B for brain|15:07, 29 March 2026}}

== We still need to complete some explanations like this one: ==

I think should change the banner shown at the top of every page to show a comic that is still incomplete, like Hoverboard or something. [[User:Sure|Sure]] ([[User talk:Sure|talk]]) 21:32, 30 August 2021 (UTC)

== Update MediaWiki ==
explainxkcd is running MediaWiki 1.30.0, which reached end-of-life in June 2019. There are likely security issues because of this, so please update MediaWiki to the latest version (or LTS) using the instructions here https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Manual:Upgrading [[User:Cam1170|Cam1170]] ([[User talk:Cam1170|talk]]) 19:41, 26 September 2021 (UTC)
:It seems like the mysql is too outdated for the upgrade [[User:Starstar|Starstar]] ([[User talk:Starstar|talk]]) 17:37, 26 November 2021 (UTC)
::Upgrade MySQL then[[User:Aaron Liu|Aaron Liu]] ([[User talk:Aaron Liu|talk]]) 03:16, 20 July 2022 (UTC)
Does anybody know how to contact an admin for this? I have no clue. [[User:Cam1170|Cam1170]] ([[User talk:Cam1170|talk]]) 03:25, 13 December 2022 (UTC)

== Allow Users to Edit their own talk page if not auto confimed ==

I can edit this page, but I can't create my own talk page! [[User:Starstar|Starstar]] ([[User talk:Starstar|talk]]) 17:34, 26 November 2021 (UTC)

== Upgrade Icons ==

The icons look quite old fashion (the ones on the sidebar and the ones above the editing text area), could they be replaced? [[User:Starstar|Starstar]] ([[User talk:Starstar|talk]]) 23:07, 26 November 2021 (UTC)
:They probably could be, but changing icons the moment they're not absolutely cutting-edge just means using new icons that are as easily edged-out (as tastes change yet again), meanwhile annoying those who prefered the first set and rather wouldn't see a revolving door of ever-evolving aesthetics.
:If I had a vote, I'd say keep the simple glyphs we're used to. If any are not totally obvious (perhaps some would not be, without the text captions) consider revising, but I think you'll get less agreement on what new images to use than that which would advocate the retention of the current ones.
:Alternately, it would definitely be on-theme to find Randall-drawn illustrations to replace them all. But the constraints of adapting (say) any particular stick-figure-world depiction of randonmess to ''meaningfully'' replace the current Random Page icon (at the same scale!) might be less than optimal.[[Special:Contributions/172.70.162.57|172.70.162.57]] 01:08, 27 November 2021 (UTC)

== Make searchbar not case-sensitive ==

The way the search bar is currently set, it only suggests comic links when what is being typed is capitalized ("Assigning Numbers" rather than "assigning numbers" for instance). Would be nice if we could make it not case-sensitive :D [[User:Char Latte49|Wielder of the Staple Gun]] ([[User talk:Char Latte49|talk]]) 02:48, 27 April 2022 (UTC)
:Good idea. [[User:Marethyu|⟨Winter is coming⟩ Marethyu]] ([[User talk:Marethyu|talk]]) 17:46, 5 May 2022 (UTC)

== Do not allow ordinary users to edit redirects that are just numbers ==

This overrides the default page you're sent to when you check a comic; e.g. recently a vandal edited the page entitled "2614" so it overrode the actual page, [[2614: 2]] on the main page.
:The problem would be when creating a new page and the overrides are needed... [[User:Marethyu|⟨Winter is coming⟩ Marethyu]] ([[User talk:Marethyu|talk]]) 17:48, 5 May 2022 (UTC)

== ExplainXKCD discord (or other platform)? ==

I'm just saying if we had instant messages, pings etc. there would be a lot faster reaction to vandals.
The community portal is hard to get attention from and comments are all very well and good but conversations on Discord could get very quick response, and people could request edits, organise page re-writing etc.
Idk if we can get "official" backing by anyone high up but we could make one anyways?
:The problem with platforms like Discord or others is that we can't guarantee that everyone has access to them; on the wiki, anyone can edit, while some people may not have access to discord or such. A possible solution would be having a sort of service built into the wiki, but not sure how that might be done. Besides, this is a wiki, not an xkcd chat site. This is a good idea, though. [[User:Marethyu|⟨Winter is coming⟩ Marethyu]] ([[User talk:Marethyu|talk]]) 17:43, 5 May 2022 (UTC)
::Anyone can create a discord account like anyone can create an account on this wiki. You don't even need a dedicated client/app as it can run in browser. Just like the wiki. Just my two cents. [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 11:28, 20 May 2022 (UTC)
:::Some user may not wish anyone to be able to contact them outside this wiki. You do not need an acount to edit this wiki... [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:14, 22 July 2022 (UTC)

== So, I got a question about transcripts. ==

A lot of comics show links (e.g.: all the ones with a drawing of wikipedia on it), and the transcripts don't really have a standard. In the transcript, should it be an actual link or just blue text or what? [[Special:Contributions/162.158.79.52|162.158.79.52]] 15:03, 2 June 2022 (UTC)Bumpf
:I'd say that if the linked thing (presuming it's a real linkable target!) is linked in the Explanation, it doesn't need to be (re)linked in the ostensibly flat-and-descriptive Transcript.
:And I know that some Transcripts are hypertext formatted to emulate the thing they are transcribed from (whether bolded, enbiggened, sub-/superscripted and and/or given the hue) but maybe ''primarily'' the "<code>[:Text that describes the text]</code>" should be explaining the details, in case the screen-reader (or text-searching algorithm grepping the Transcript text for "green text" or "superscript" instances can't quite work it out from the various style-tags that can be applied to that effect in so many an various ways.
:But this is IMO, I don't know if there's a specific policy about it, but it is how I've seen it vaguely applied... Not everywhere quite so consistently, though. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.91.128|172.70.91.128]] 20:28, 2 June 2022 (UTC)
::We try to keep links and explanations out of the transcript. The link and the explanation goes in the explanation section above. [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:12, 22 July 2022 (UTC)

== Use 2X Images ==

Apparently xkcd.com provides double-sized versions of almost every comic if you add '''_2x''' to the end of the image name. For instance,

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/watches.png

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/watches_2x.png

Since we are in 2022 and computers can load high-resolution images just fine, and they are easier to read, I propose that this website should use the provided double-sized images. Really, I think Randall ought to be doing this himself as well. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.18.107|172.68.18.107]] 12:22, 17 August 2022 (UTC)

:While I agree with using the higher quality images which are default on xkcd.com for many people, there has been [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Proposals#Link_to_high-resolution_images.3F discussion] about this issue already. At the moment, the consensus seems to be to continue using the 'standard' size to 'use less space,' and instead link to the higher quality image on the image page. —[[User:Theusaf|theusaf]] ([[User talk:Theusaf|talk]]) 14:35, 17 August 2022 (UTC)

::I think I may have mentioned it on that link (or similar), but often when the 2x image is used (or even an unwise too wide image/unbreakable-line-of-content) the explainxkcd site cannot sensibly handle it and it forces the default 'page width' of stuff into a zoomed out narrower column to the left (including the margin-line normally inset a dozen or so pixels in from the right) so that browser-window can display the whole of this wide element.
::While "saving space" does apply to server resources and viewer download bandwidth/quotas (e.g.[https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/unreliable_connection.png 53kb] vs [https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/unreliable_connection_2x.png 109kb]) may seem insignificant, screen-space can be badly hit by this.
::The motherlode xkcd site has code behind it to (usually?) serve the right image for the right displays, but explainxkcd isn't currently equipped to do the same choose-and-provide (which would need ''both'' images uploaded to it and a revised {{template|comic}} implementation, once we work out the method it could use). And I've never seen any case where the 'low quality' comic is conversely too small and narrow to appreciate (though occasionally the larger one reveals minor drawing details that have been obscured by the downscaling), just when the _2x one makes everything ''else'' too small.
::...this may not apply to everyone's browser implementation, but it definitely happens, and consistently, on my usual Chrome and/or Firefox on Windows and/or Android platforms (according to which system I happen to be on at the time). [[Special:Contributions/172.70.162.147|172.70.162.147]] 21:20, 17 August 2022 (UTC)
:::ExplainXKCD actually does have the capability to do this. For example, see [[1079:_United_Shapes]]. It generates multiple images, automatically choosing one based on screen size (similar to how xkcd.com does it). The bot could use the `imagesize` parameter to keep the image within the page's width by using the 'standard' image size. This does add a button labeled "click to enlarge," but if that is annoying, the comic template can be modified to hide that button if specified.
:::Here is what it might look like:
:::{{cot}}
{{User:Theusaf/Template:comic_2x
| number = 2647
| date = July 18, 2022
| title = Capri Suns
| image = capri_suns_2x.png
| titletext = [As security is dragging me away] "Come on, at least I didn't make the mistake in the other direction!"
| imagesize = 315x317px
| noexpand = true
}}
{{cob}}
:::which is clearer than the original comic page and the same size. —[[User:Theusaf|theusaf]] ([[User talk:Theusaf|talk]]) 05:20, 18 August 2022 (UTC)
::::As specificaly implemented above, I certainly see no immediate problem (need to check across machines/devices), but I suspect that part of the mechanism here is the "imagesize = 315x317px", which seems like it would need (albeit by the page-create bot, algorithm8cally) to be tailored to the 'input' image, not always in this ratio). I'm not technically conversant with the nature of your back-end scripting and doubtless it's all possible (scripts can do almost anything... once you know that they (may) need to do them and rewritten them to catch all the contingencies ;) ), but I don't know know if that's something you've accounted for (e.g. test with a three/four-panel wide comic, or the Earth Temperature Timeline or whatever, and see if it can facilitate them all nicely). Not to mention that if theusafBOT goes offline, the manual-add instructions (as used prior to your replacing the prior functioning bot, for which I thank you) also need this extra step of user involvement to be done, whereas usually the fallback manual method needed little thought in this direction (or indeed however much carbon or silicon there is in the 'brain' involved) except for exceptional circumstances or those rare prior slip-ups by Randall.
::::I'm just going through the first obvious issue (to me), didn't mean to concentrate so many words on just this before even checking everything else! [[Special:Contributions/172.70.91.80|172.70.91.80]] 09:15, 18 August 2022 (UTC)
:::::Basically, on the backend, the bot will fetch both the small and the large images, and measure the size of the small image, which is what it will use for the <code>imagesize</code>. I have actually used this system in the past for this bot, but was told to revert it due to the "click comic to enlarge" text. As for if the bot goes offline, there is no problem with falling back to the small image, and if editors want to, I can also provide instructions for using the large image. I'm mostly just waiting to see what others think about this. Are there any other problems to consider? —[[User:Theusaf|theusaf]] ([[User talk:Theusaf|talk]]) 14:44, 18 August 2022 (UTC)

== I'm making an App that collects web comics ==

My original idea was to use the rss feed present on xkcd, and other webcomic websites, but now im starting to wonder if there was a way to make a better service, that allowed users to maybe look at older comics, and explanations and such as well, and thats how i happened to come across explainxkcd.com. The RSS Feed for this website, would be pretty helpful, if it were like reddit's but apparently, the rss feed is only maintained for the home page. I was wondering if you guys provided that data through an API or something? Also are there wikis for other famous comics like this one? Any other suggestions and ideas for the app are welcome 🙌🙌.

== Comics edited after their publication ==

many more comics have been changed than are in Category:Comics edited after their publication ! please add them (i already have done two i remember off the top of my head) [[Special:Contributions/172.70.134.223|172.70.134.223]] 12:56, 7 October 2022 (UTC)Bumpf

== What if 2 book page creation ==
What if 2 has come out, but I don't know which page is to be created. There is already a comic under the same name. [[User:ClassicalGames|ClassicalGames]] ([[User talk:ClassicalGames|talk]]) 08:54, 3 May 2023 (UTC)

== Default to 3 Section Headings for Each Explanation: Non-Obvious Info, Recap, and Background Trivia ==

This is a proposal that all new comic explanations should, by default, have 3 Sections:

'''I. Explanation of the Non-Obvious''' (an actual explanation of the non-obvious elements of the comic for the average reader who might not understand the references/joke/relevant science)

'''II. Full Recap'''

'''III. Background Trivia'''

Most of us can agree that Category I is where the value of this website shines.

But today, all 3 of these categories of explanation are typically merged together, making it hard to find the Category I nuggets of goodness.

If we make these 3 section headings the default on every comic explanation, then this default will helpfully nudge editors to put the juiciest stuff up top, and not to clutter that section up with fluff or trivia.

——

As an example, take the recent comic #2878 about Astronomer Happiness and Supernova distance.

The main thing a lay reader would want to know — the Category I information — is…

..That the shape of the graph is probably a clever reference to a Light Curve, a type of supernova graph

..why astronomers like it when a supernova is close, and what happens when it gets too close

Everything else in the (currently) very wordy explanation gets in the way of the lay reader finding out these two things. It’s a bunch of Category II and Category III info that makes it hard to tease out the Category I info. It’s not BAD information, but it’s sandpaper. It’s friction slowing down the average reader.

Obviously I could go in and edit this particular comic, and I often do this kind of edit, but I think this issue pops up for most explanations, so I think changing the standard default interface will help everyone put their contribution into the right section.

In sum, my proposal would elevate Category I info to the top of each explanation, so instead of full recaps, we get right into the explanation that is going to be most efficiently illuminating for the average, non-expert reader, answering the most common questions.

[[User:Laser813|Laser813]] ([[User talk:Laser813|talk]]) 10:50, 12 January 2024 (UTC)
:In general (if I get dibs on the edit, or think I can legitimately re-edit/rearrange), I do try to go for "hook, line, sinker" format (i.e. establish the basics, relate that to what the comic shows, move on to any relevent speculations/extrapolations), very like your setup. Though it is often ''much'' too complicated (multi-layered, cross-disciplinary, etc, so that maybe it has to be interwoven 'mini explanations' per tabulated item) so I'm not sure how easy it would be to enforce a strict structure. I think there's merit to the principle, though. Assuming we can all agree what each comic needs focus on (apply that problem to the following proposal too!), as I've occasionally inserted a sort of "first you need to know <subject>" into an established cold-start explanation ("you see <foo>" only for a later editor to consider it more an afterthought and shuffle it to later ("you see <foo>" ... "<foo> is part of <subject>"), or variations on such layouts. Especially as different people have different ideas as to what's obvious/can be keyword-wikilinked and what needs more waffle to properly enlighten readers.
:Also, prosaic variation is a good thing. Too formulaic and it could be (whilst accurate) considered too robotic, so some leaway should really always be allowed as we collectively bash together a community interpretation and elaboration. Within communal guidelines, clearly. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.194.203|172.69.194.203]] 15:53, 12 January 2024 (UTC)

== FAQ Style Editing should be the norm ==

Simply, we should experiment with more FAQ-style explanations.

We think of the top questions that the average reader might have about a comic, and we use those as bolded headers to explain the most curious/confusing/subtle/sciency parts of the comic.

The structure would be this (using a recent comic as an example)…

'''Q: Why did Randall use this shape of graph?'''
A: It’s likely a clever reference to a Light Curve, a similarly shaped graph in the study of supernovae that…

'''Q: Why do astronomers prefer it when supernovae are closer?'''
A: It makes it easier to glean information because…

[[User:Laser813|Laser813]] ([[User talk:Laser813|talk]]) 10:50, 12 January 2024 (UTC)

== sidebar revamp ==
I think that the sidebar looks plain and it should have a new design. It could be voted on by users [[User:Moderator|Moderator]] ([[User talk:Moderator|talk]]) 02:16, 5 February 2024 (UTC)
:In leiu of you telling us what you think would be better, my starting vote is that I'm perfectly happy with that 'plain'. If it has the links I might need, why does it need a reskin? Or, worse, a functional revamp which probably removes the easy to use bits I was using already.
:...could you do a mock-up screenshot (or render equivalents directly in markup) of before/after side by side, at least? [[Special:Contributions/172.69.194.120|172.69.194.120]] 03:11, 5 February 2024 (UTC)

My biggest problem is it doesn’t scroll down with you which can be a big pain [[User:Moderator|Moderator]] ([[User talk:Moderator|talk]]) 01:43, 6 February 2024 (UTC)
:Don't know about anyone else, but (when not on a desktop) I read this on a tablet, in landscape, with the effective window quite short (ratio of 1:2 with width, approaching 1:3.5 with already narrowed onscreen keyboard popped up) and if I'm scrolled to the top I see nothing beyond Browse Comics.
:If we assume separate scroll-control on the sidebar, setting Main Page at the top of browser pane gives What Links Here at the bottom. Now, I rarely use the next three links (or at least reach those pages using them), and separate scrolling wouldn't stop me even seeing the even lower Ad bit (but it ''would'' defeat the entire purpose of the Ad, in that position, whether or not I bother to notice it these days).
:So whatever missing about you propose, I'm betting it would impact me. Perhaps not negatively, but I've seen enough awful assumptions about my screen-area in the name of scroll-free design. Including the "give us permission (or not) to give you cookies" popovers where it appears the actual buttons to confirm (or deny, or go somewhere to review and customise, if they have that option) are beyond the bottom of my screen. I can temporarily rotate the screen, of course, but often I just back out and don't bother in those cases. I wouldn't be reticent to rotate this site, on occasion, but ''I'd really rather not have to'', if I can be so selfish and stick-in-the-mud, because websites just are not good to use (even temporarily) in narrow-portait mode. (What's worse is the websites that detect I'm on a mobile platform and redesign styles/placements on-the-fly to 'fit portrait view', assuming a vertical smartphone, ''regardless'' of my actual viewport orientation, etc.)
:So, please, a hard no from me. Notwithstanding that just as solidly "always browse in portrait" people might be overjoyed at changes that would give ''them'' a better site design. But that's a tricky circle to square (or letterbox!), and not what you were suggesting anyway (now we know what it is). I just want to plea that any changes be made with a very good idea of all the knock-on effects of 'improving' certain edge-cases, especially when it comes to yet other edge-cases. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.23|172.70.85.23]] 10:29, 6 February 2024 (UTC)
==New Logo and Banner Proposals==
:I have new logo and banner proposals for this site.
:They're made on Scratch, an all-ages block-based programming language, and are in the style of Right Click.
:Here they are!
:Logo proposal: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Logo_proposal_for_explain_xkcd.png
:Banner proposal: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Banner_proposal_for_explain_xkcd.png {{unsigned ip|172.69.71.37|01:54, 19 February 2024 (UTC)}}
::I can't see the xkcdicity of the logo, really. The banner is certainly flavourful in the right way (does it scale down well? ...is that what your use of Scratch is for, as opposed to standard static Photoshop/GIMP image editing?), but not sure it'll work better for the current top-left-of-page xkcd (with three xkcd figurses idling away, sat on the letters).
::Decent concept art for something else related, certainly. I could believe it was a Randall's-own interactive comic front-end of some kind (which would make sense of the "play button" that is the "►"-bit). Given that it's now in a programming system already, have you tried making a drag'n'click game of the idea of linking/looping the blue-trail, and animating the hanging-on characters? [[Special:Contributions/172.70.90.29|172.70.90.29]] 13:34, 19 February 2024 (UTC)
:::It's an arrow, not a play button. Get it right. {{unsigned ip|172.69.71.72|01:05, 20 February 2024 (UTC)}}
::::Hold your horses... I was just trying to find a good reason for the whatever-it-is triangle to be there (gave the example of a 'play' button in my speculated usefulness of it). And it isn't really obviously any more of an arrow (c.f. "→"), either. I like your(?) banner's use of xkcd-figures, just not sure where the logo exhibits any form of being xkcd-related, except by the literal reading of it.
::::Perhaps if it were "xkcd font" (i.e. artfully composited from actual samples of Randall's ALLCAPS comic-writing) then it wouldn't matter so much, but I just wouldn't say it was any more on-brand than the current logo/etc. This being intended as constructive criticism, I hope you understand. And there's more opinions than mine, so maybe I've indeed just missed some point that ''everyone else'' (especially named-users) have already realised. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.86.5|172.70.86.5]] 02:33, 20 February 2024 (UTC)

== Regarding precision in the Unexplained popup ==

Would it be possible to add an extra decimal point for the sake of precision? Currently, it shows that 0% of comics are unexplained, which is (as of 13:21 UTC on March 27, 2024) incorrect. It's a small thing, but it's rather annoying. {{unsigned ip|162.158.158.233|13:23, 27 March 2024 (UTC)}}
:With the current 2911 comics (give or take #404), 0.1% would be slightly under 3 comics. You'd need at least three before 0.1% appeared instead of the equally unuseful 0.0%.
:I'm of the "at least give everyone a week before you unilaterally declare it 'done'..." camp, so right now ''just'' the latest M/W/F comic incomplete would hover at a token 0.1%.
:(Actually, from two (0.06...% rounded up) to 4 (0.13...% rounded down. The good news is that it'll be almost seven years until two-rounded-up is insufficient, but also up to six-rounded-down is now "0.1%", if I've not goofed the carries/etc.)
:If going to the trouble of editing it to 1DP, make it 2DP with ''exactly'' the same editing effort..?
<blockquote>
<center>
<font size=5px>''Welcome to the '''explain [[xkcd]]''' wiki!''</font><br>
We have an explanation for all [[:Category:All comics|'''{{#expr:{{PAGESINCAT:All comics|R}}-1}}''' xkcd comics]],

and only {{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete explanations|R}}
({{#expr: {{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete explanations|R}} / {{LATESTCOMIC}} * 100 round 2}}%) [[:Category:Incomplete explanations|are incomplete]]. Help us finish them!
</center>
</blockquote>
:(As of time of posting, the above says "only 2 (0.07%)". From 0.0687049...% rounded up to 2DP.)
:Though given that we're only going to go into the future,{{Citation needed}} I suggest we can state the flat-out number. It's not now really going to be as scarily huge as it might have been, as the actual percentage becomes generally less significant.
:And, for niceness, give it a grammatically/factually agreeable form:
<blockquote>
;General form:
:<code><nowiki>... and {{#ifeq:  | 0 | no |  }} comic{{#ifeq:  | 1 | | s }} [[:Category:Incomplete explanations|{{#ifeq:  | 1 | is | are }} incomplete]]. ...</nowiki></code>
;Zero cases (hardcoded):
:... and {{#ifeq: 0 | 0 | no |  }} comic{{#ifeq: 0 | 1 | | s }} [[:Category:Incomplete explanations|{{#ifeq: 0 | 1 | is | are }} incomplete]]. ...
;One case (hardcoded):
:... and {{#ifeq: 1 | 0 | no | 1 }} comic{{#ifeq: 1 | 1 | | s }} [[:Category:Incomplete explanations|{{#ifeq: 1 | 1 | is | are }} incomplete]]. ...
;Multiple cases (hardcoded):
:... and {{#ifeq: 42 | 0 | no | 42 }} comic{{#ifeq: 42 | 1 | | s }} [[:Category:Incomplete explanations|{{#ifeq: 42 | 1 | is | are }} incomplete]]. ...
;Current cases (dynamic):
:... and {{#ifeq: {{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete explanations|R}} | 0 | none | {{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete explanations|R}} }} comic{{#ifeq: {{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete explanations|R}} | 1 | | s }} [[:Category:Incomplete explanations|{{#ifeq: {{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete explanations|R}} | 1 | is | are }} incomplete]]. ...
</blockquote>
:...easy to replicate to get "Help us finish them!" to change (upon a zero-test truth) to "But they all might be improvable!". Or change the :Cat:Link to not even be a link when zero, with alternate phrasing dodged over to in order to avoid "no comics are incomplete" in other ways.
:I wrote the above for minimal nesting of overlapping conditions. You might prefer just to go with <code><nowiki>{{#ifeq: <count> | 0 | <whole "zero cases" version> | {{#ifeq: <count> | 1 | <whole "single case" version> | <whole "plurality of cases" version> }} }}</nowiki></code> - both approaches involve repetitions, but maybe this other one can be given a ''degree'' of wikimarkup-readability within each case, to take pity on future editors. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.160.166|172.70.160.166]] 16:02, 27 March 2024 (UTC)

== Hear me out: What If? discussion page. ==

That's it. That's my idea. Go crazy, everyone. [[User:Psychoticpotato|Psychoticpotato]] ([[User talk:Psychoticpotato|talk]]) 14:05, 4 April 2024 (UTC)
:Yup, I've been thinking the same thing. I would like a page on each What If entry. [[User:Maplestrip|Maplestrip]] ([[User talk:Maplestrip|talk]]) 07:42, 8 April 2024 (UTC)
::I've thought about this, over the years. Having 'a page' (rather than the summary table, in the [[what if? (blog)|overview page]], etc) does sound more completist than what we currently have but I then tend to hit the main ontological problem...
::In the What-Ifs, Randall takes a 'simple' question and then ''explains'' the consequences. At length. A 'comic page' structure (starting with how we'd deal with the multiple midpoint images, so we would stray far from using the {{template|comic}} introduction) that followed the header(image,etc)/explanation/transcript/(trivia)/included-comments format would be silly and have many parts inappropriate. Remove the Transcript, for starters. ''Or'' need a mini-Transcript for each 'illustrative' image. (e.g. ":[Black Hat:] What if we tried more power?", several times.)
::Is there an actual need to ''explain Randall's explanation..''? Because that's the only thing 'we' can do. Which is rather silly, and seems like it would take a small (entertainingly rambling) essay and expand it into a large (pedantically rambling) one.
::Or else we just straight-copy the What-If over here as a 'backup'-blag? Allowable, but not exactly a USP, there'll be Internet Archive and personal copies, should things go bad at Randall's end. Not really a noble-cause.
::My suggestion, as to how to cover the remaining "explanation gap" and provide a useful 'service' that's worthwhile maintaining, is ''maybe'' two What If? (Blag) sub-pages:
::#A place to collate all inter-text images (and hover-/title-texts), and Transcript them, for easy searching.
::#*e.g. when you know you want to refer to the "bomb to the eyeball" one (internally or for something external) but think you might not realise where you need to go to (the supernova neutrinos one!) just by scrolling a bare comic list.
::#*Or you'd like to see, at a glance, how many different places the Black Hat Try More Power running joke occurs.
::#*Even if you don't want to open the page itself (160+ 'comics' with say 5 images each, is an 800ish-image page, less rationalising 'repeats' to a single entry), it should at least give you a search result for "dry waterfall" that points you in the direction of the "Niagra Straw" one (and maybe others?).
::#*I could see these being brief Image/Titletext/Transcript/(optional explanatory context), but not enough material to make them separate comic-style-pages in their own right, right?
::#Something of the same 'collation page mechanism' for all those superscript-popup-'footnote' bits. Though I admit I'm not entirely sure for what purpose except that it just ''seems'' like a good "collection page" to maintain. Perhaps to offer updated onward-links if any of the originals suffer link-rot? (But then, that fate can occur to all non-popupped links, so maybe I've chosen the wrong thing to highlight.)
::...the question is, what do you want from it. Bear in mind that if you can creae pages here then you can set up what ''you'' think you'd like to see (e.g. for What-If#1, for starters) then get the community to assess it. Do it as a sub-page to your Userspace, maybe, as proof-of-concept.
::Just because it's not been seen as necessary so far, doesn't mean it's not necessary. I've thought about it a lot (not thst I'm in a position to inplement anything), but I've only decided that I don't see a need for a straight copy (others' views may differ on that) and not enough reason to pester for ''my'' 'ideas' to be fulfilled. But I aint 'in charge' here, and happily so. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.194.100|172.69.194.100]] 11:29, 8 April 2024 (UTC)
:::You make a fair point. He did already explain in great detail what would happen if [x] scenario happened. It just seems like it would be nice to have a page exclusively for discussing all the ''What If'' articles. [[User:Psychoticpotato|Psychoticpotato]] ([[User talk:Psychoticpotato|talk]]) 20:49, 15 May 2024 (UTC)
::::People just need to make a draft or two and see what happens. Be sure to link a draft here if one is created, I would like to help on it. "I want to learn more and explore this scenario further" is a valid feeling to have. [[User:Maplestrip|Maplestrip]] ([[User talk:Maplestrip|talk]]) 07:34, 16 May 2024 (UTC)

== Randall-ify the Captcha ==

Let's have some fun: Is it feasible to replace the Captcha with something "xkcd-ish" like "click on Randall's work" with a mix of XKCD stuff and generic pictures. If not, how about a replacing it with a quiz like "which of the following IS [or IS NOT] xkcd character" with one obvious correct answer. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.26.75|172.68.26.75]] 16:11, 9 May 2024 (UTC)
:are YOU able to create a CAPTCHA from scratch? [[User:42.book.addict|42.book.addict]] ([[User talk:42.book.addict|talk]]) 15:59, 13 May 2024 (UTC)
::Choose any images that contain user-made CAPTCHAs from the following selection. [[User:Psychoticpotato|Psychoticpotato]] ([[User talk:Psychoticpotato|talk]]) 21:22, 13 May 2024 (UTC)
::We could also make captchas based on most of [[:Category:CAPTCHA|these]]. [[User:PDesbeginner|PDesbeginner]] ([[User talk:PDesbeginner|talk]]) 02:57, 11 September 2025 (UTC)

== Incomplete Tag Vote ==

I think each comic's discussion page should have a section to vote on whether the explanation is complete or not. How long do you think the voting period should be?[[User:PDesbeginner|PDesbeginner]] ([[User talk:PDesbeginner|talk]]) 03:42, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
:Rather than a voting period, I think it would be ideal if people could "vote" on the completeness of an article at any time. As I go through all the old pages, I come across lots of pages that feel a little bit incomplete. It would be nice if we had a measurement of completion that wasn't binary. [[User:Maplestrip|Maplestrip]] ([[User talk:Maplestrip|talk]]) 10:16, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
::Feel free to add the incomplete tag again. But don't forget to mention WHY (either in the tag or the discussion or both) you think it's incomplete. :) The tag is mainly there so you can have a list of "incomplete" comics. A comic is either on that list or it isn't. This is pretty much binary. As for voting: If I think an explanation is complete and it bothers me that it's flagged as not I generally juts make a comment in the discussion asking if someone has still something to add or actually knows WHY it's still incomplete. If there's no response after a few days I delete the tag. There's no need to make a voting out of this. And if somone strongly disagrees to you there's always the "Undo"-link ;) [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 11:09, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
:::Sometimes I just feel "this could use more detail," without specifically knowing what the detail would look like. This can be a problem when it's about explaining complicated science: the "completion" of a description of quantum mechanics that is readable by a novice, is very subjective. I am realizing the problem with the persistent voting idea tho: many people will vote something as "incomplete" but wouldn't come back to check on it later. [[User:Maplestrip|Maplestrip]] ([[User talk:Maplestrip|talk]]) 12:08, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
::::I'm more in the "less is more" camp. Most of my recent contributions to this wiki were deleting parts of bloated explanations: You don't need to explain quantum mechanics unless it's absolutely crucial for understanding the respective comic. Of course, if you are an expert in any given field, [[2501|it's hard to tell]] whether or not the current explanation is sufficient for a layperson and most contributors tend to write "too much". Which is totally fine. People like me take care of the "too much". ;) So, if you are an expert in quantum mechanics ignore "completed" comics about quantum mechanics. Surely you could contribute a lot to it but chances are high that most of it is unnecessary for the comic. Instead ask yourself if you need more information to understand that comic about biology. And if you do, add an incomplete and ask for that information ;) [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 12:31, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
:I've been here a long time, effectively back to when there were ''missing'' explanations (other than the "too new to have the barebones put in" ones, these days only seen when the current BOT is tardy or offline for some reason), and I've seen the Incomplete template change from the useful 'infill marker' to become a regular joke-tag of a similar nature to the Citation Needed. Yes, I agree that both of these (and the Because You're Dumb" tag) are perhaps a bit confusing for new users (like the one who badly edited out a link, just now, apparently thinking it was spam, because of the way it mentioned viagra), but I have grown to see them as community in-jokes (of various degrees of subtlety) that many people seem to appreciate under their current incarnations.
:We've recently removed the Main Page's more literal "there are # incomplete articles" announcement, which leaves the purpose of ''more accurately'' using the Incomplete tag a little less important. Apart from letting us dive into the (purported) list of Incomplete Explanations, one of the main ''serious'' purposes of the Incomplete tag is removed, leaving the now consistently employed purpose of doing a "Created by a THING OTHER THAN THE BOT" joke much more prominent.
:Really, all articles are potentially incomplete, still. Some more than others. Something big, like Hoverboard or Gravity, might truly have easter-eggs or subtle details as yet not properly commented upon, but there have been edits to ''double-digit'' comics recently which might be considered improvements. As such, there are really only two 'sensible' direct courses of action:
:#Completely remove the Incomplete tag, from use, as all pages are only ever as complete as the eye of any particular beholder, and the more recent pages are ''obviously'' incomplete by their being barely 15 minutes (or a day, or ''maybe'' a week) old. Or being so huge (or Time-like!) that they clearly still haven't been 'completely' documented. Maybe the BOT can add a Created By The Bot tag that gets wiped out by the first serious attempt at human editing, but if we wish to lose this part of our site culture so readily then why ever have it at all? A wikivote system is not really that accurate under these circumstances, for a number of reasons that I needn't explain, so go straight to assuming that any such 'vote' would pass, right from the off...
:#Embrace it for its THING OTHER THAN A BOT usage, alone. Don't be so eager to remove them just because you have no personal changes you'd wish to see. (Votes or not, there could always be another editor along in a minute who has, unlike the rest of you, picked up on an obscure visual pun rendered in what turns out to be hieroglyphs, or similar.) If we have to cull them (not a given!), then let it be an unstated rule (or a stated one?) that if there are more than (e.g.) half a dozen then the 'least amusing' may be removed by the first editor who wishes to express a critical opinion. Just the one at a time. No reinstating, no resurrection, no adding to old articles that never ever had a 'joke Incomplete' before, no entirely new joke (but you can refine what's there, to a degree), just a rolling (and not necessarily consecutive!) set of the "finest natjve explainxkcd wit". Or at least the least objectionable surviving examples of same.
:As a practical guide, the "reason why you think it is Incomplete element" could be entirely served by in-line tags (the "What?" and "Why?" and "Date?" things you might see elsewhere). Perhaps we could even do ''both'' things by instead having a "Complete" tag ''explicitly'' for BOT-REPLACEMENT-type tomfoolery (and tongue-in-cheekness about Completion, as we might currently be about Incometeness) from the off. That might confuse the newbods, of course. At least until it doesn't, and then they're not newbods anymore...
:The companion tag, for Incomplete Transcript, is presumably going to serve as it currently does (as a still serious hint as to actual Incompleteness), albeit that I've noticed a trend for the first editor of a brand new published comic to (possibly ''after'' doing the BOT-replacement joke, or after the editor who did ''only'' that) go straight in and enTranscript it (to varying degrees of accuracy and completion), whether or not they also then remove that specific tag-template at the same time. It seems that some people are more comfortable at providing a ''Transcript''ion-service than they are at establishing even the seed of an Explanation. (Or they only have enough time to do the latter, to the level of detail they wish to achieve in the moment open to them.)
:This is, of course, a cultural issue. All the above (from me) is just my own perception of practical aspects, notwithstanding those opinions already expressed before that (and elsewhere). I don't speak for everyone. And, as a perpetual IP, technically I should say that I don't speak for ''anyone'', either... [[Special:Contributions/172.70.160.140|172.70.160.140]] 14:21, 19 June 2024 (UTC)

::I like the idea of removing the Incomplete tag. What do you think? [[User:PDesbeginner|PDesbeginner]] ([[User talk:PDesbeginner|talk]]) 14:57, 19 June 2024 (UTC)
::I greatly approve of a <nowiki>{{what}}</nowiki> tag, as a Wikipedian that's actually really funny. I would want to keep the Incomplete tag, as I think it has purpose, even if it no longer represents a goal to achieve. I think this website will never reach 100.00% completeness and that is good, actually. [[User:Maplestrip|Maplestrip]] ([[User talk:Maplestrip|talk]]) 14:05, 26 June 2024 (UTC)
::Okay. If someone wants to they can just ignore the incomplete tags. [[User:PDesbeginner|PDesbeginner]] ([[User talk:PDesbeginner|talk]]) 14:37, 28 June 2024 (UTC)

== "As of <now>"... ==

What would be rather useful is an <code><nowiki>{{As of now}}</nowiki></code> template (or similar wording, and perhaps an "as of now"-cased alternative for use mid-sentence). There are many articles that will have words along the lines of "this has not yet happened, as of August 2024" or "this situation is continuing, as of August 2024". Every now and then, someone will come across one of these with an older date (perhaps only just out of date, perhaps years old) and [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1858:_4th_of_July&curid=20285&diff=348082&oldid=315524 edit it accordingly]. You could also seek them all out, deliberately, with a bit of effort in the search-bar.

(Note that "as of" does not ''always'' need updating, there are non-dated examples such as in [[1074: Moon Landing#Trivia]], static transcript versions, like [[1071: Exoplanets#Transcript]] and other instances where the text "as of", with or without a date, really does not need to be changed... but sometimes is anyway by a well-meaning passer-by.)

Sometimes, this can be done along with another useful edit/update/revision that is spotted, or is just one of the revisions that some other need for change conveniently allows. But it seems a bit vague to rely upon occasional attention. Instead the template will implement something like "<code><nowiki>As of {{Monthyear}}</nowiki></code>" (here having to use <code><nowiki>{{#time:F Y}}</nowiki></code>, ..."As of {{#time:F Y}}"...), though there's the possibility that a parameter-mediated switch can let it alternatively become a to-the-day-level format option (at which point you could even implement/calcuate something like {{template|Yesterday}} would be) or just to the year-level. (Or add {{template|As of this year}}, {{template|As of this month}} and {{template|As of this day}} separately.)

This would negate the need to ''just'' poke and prod any article that happened to 'need' updating every month (or year, or possible day). And to deal with the possibility that some of these cases might actually need to be edited because "as of" does ''not'' now apply, include within it a {{:Category:As of}} membership, letting anyone who is interested keep an eye on these aggregated 'As of's, ready to jump in there and change it to some straight up "Up until <fixed date>" equivalent should any one of them actually no longer apply.

...obviously, I can't even begin to create the template page required, but I'd be happy to work on the exact wikimedia code required if anyone thinks it needs anything but the most basic transcluded formatting and doesn't know how. Open to discussion, and I'll tag on more if I happen to see that discussion developing. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.162.186|172.70.162.186]] 18:04, 4 August 2024 (UTC)
:As an addendum/change to my above suggestion, considering a simpler {{template|as of}} (and {{template|As of}}) which does ''no'' automagical continuous updating (just gives the "as of" literal on its own), but still guarantees "Category:As of" membership, so that it doesn't actively give wrong (new) date+circumstance relationships in the likes of [[1047: Approximations]]. In that, the several mentions of populations can safely stay as old years until someone rewrites the proposed value and assessment as well, but it still could be a task to pursue every new year after checking the Cat for likely comics needing a quick check'n'edit.

== “Grammar Bot” ==
I’m working on a python based bot written with the Pywiki library that aims to use the replace.py scripts to fix simple grammatical mistakes, e.g. correcting Citation needed placements, cleaning up extra spaces, etc. I will be posting the code in a few weeks after I finish it (I’m a bit busy at the moment with school and orchestra) so the entire community can view it. Any thoughts on the idea? Thanks. [[User:42.book.addict|42.book.addict]] ([[User talk:42.book.addict|talk]]) 21:05, 5 September 2024 (UTC)
:First thoughts are that there are going to be so many exceptions. I definitely agree with the idea of {{template|Citation needed}}s being made consistent (if only it weren't sometimes complicated{{Citation needed}}), as well as that of mysterious extra spaces. But that's not really grammatical. Punctuation, in the first case. I fear a full (or even fragmentary) grammar-checker is going to be complicated and give many false positives.
:At least at first, perhaps have it ''report'' what it thinks it has found. You may discover definite times that it isn't necessary and it would indeed create new errors.
:At the very least, run it with two checklists: One to do an automatic replace.py and one to just report. Start with the first list empty. Introduce potential ones to the latter, review all the reports carefully, ''then'' move any sensible-looking ones to former.
:And have it not fighting other bots (particularly theusafBOT), perhaps selected users (e.g. the likes of Kynde, and of course yourself) or indeed itself (if it makes a change that might inadvertently trigger another 'check') by excluding such changes for a recheck/rechange. Keep a record of what it changed, so that if anybody reverts/recorrects something that seems to have gone wrong it doesn't force it 'wrong' again. At the simplest, give a whole page a decent time-out and/or number of subsequent limits before it ''considers'' a new change. Implement from the start the option of a 'whitelist' (of pages it can ignore) or 'blacklist' (of rules it shouldn't apply, or at least actively apply, to a given page), so you can quickly manually add a throttle-down by simple config-file rather than have to add in a code-kludge when something obviously (in hindsight!) needs correcting about the way it works. And also maybe throttle it to have no more than one bot-edit per hour (while starting from scratch) to not swamp the system and give the rest of us time to assess any errors it has made (and its successes!) - you can unstick that throttle later, when you consider it tested with all its backlog of microcorrections.
:...there are a few other guidelines I would suggest, but the cautiousness already present in the above approaches might mean that they are left as not so important. Just consider what ''could'' go wrong before unleashing it on our world.
:And all power to your elbow, it is of course something we all might have considered (I know I have... not that I have the login for it, but what really stopped me was knowing how badly I could mess it up by getting just one detail wrong if I tried it).
:Among changes/alerts I would have it make would be cases of {{template|cn}}, {{template|citation needed}}, etc, instead of the 'main' template. Plus []-links to either wikipedia pages (most of them should be {{template|w}}-templated) or explainxkcd.com pages (most of them should be [[]]ed), although there are even then some exceptions. It'd also be nice if it can identify all Talk (and Community Portal) contributions that were not signed (more complex, as some may be after the fact, or have been after several years and further editings). I know how I'd do all this, or think I do (only upon starting to do it can I be sure I've actually theorised it correctly!), but I mention this mostly to point out how ''you'' might want to cautiously implement ''your'' ideas. HTH. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.86.15|172.70.86.15]] 00:07, 6 September 2024 (UTC)
::you have made plenty of wonderful points that I clearly have not thought about-quite the critical oversight on my part. Is anyone interested in collaborating? I don’t think that my skills are good enough to satisfy all of those points. [[User:42.book.addict|42.book.addict]] ([[User talk:42.book.addict|talk]]) 01:06, 6 September 2024 (UTC)
:::hello? Anybody? Please help… [[User:42.book.addict|42.book.addict]] ([[User talk:42.book.addict|talk]]) 17:38, 9 September 2024 (UTC)
::::I believe this would be a great idea and also an incredibly complicated feat. Randall is no stranger to using weird punctuation in comics or misspelled words. I think it would be neat if it weren't automated and just reported errors it found so we could manually fix them, which would make its development much easier, but at that point it's very similar to a series of search queries for misspelled words, which we can already do. I have no coding skills so I'm not going to be of help. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:33, 7 November 2024 (UTC)
;Update
I have found a solution to fix most grammatical mistakes, I just need to make sure that it doesn’t correct character names like “Cueball”, not edit war with other bots, come up with a system to log the edits it makes so that it doesn’t revert again, and fix Citation needed templates. I already know how to make sure that it asks me before editing, so I want to create an account to test it out. Does anybody have ideas on what to name the bot? I don’t want to call it 42.book.addictBOT, since the username would be a bit clunky. ToriBOT could work, but I’m also open to any other names. Feel free to reply to this or reply to me on my talk page! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#db97bf">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#97b6db">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 20:30, 29 November 2024 (UTC)

== "dark mode" ==
add dark mode [[User:CalibansCreations|'''<span style="color:#ff0000;">Caliban</span>''']] ([[User talk:CalibansCreations|talk]]) 09:54, 18 November 2024 (UTC)
:See [[User:Certified nqh/common.css]] or copy/paste my old [[User:42.book.addict/common.css|common.css]] page history into your common.css page: -42.book.addict [[Special:Contributions/172.69.134.208|172.69.134.208]] 16:10, 18 November 2024 (UTC)
::ha, thx tori, nqh's common.css works like a charm :) [[User:CalibansCreations|'''<span style="color:#ff0000;">Caliban</span>''']] ([[User talk:CalibansCreations|talk]]) 08:51, 21 November 2024 (UTC)

== reddit ==
Add reddit- Anonymous {{unsigned ip|172.71.214.80|08:31, 21 November 2024 (UTC)}}
:You probably need to explain what you mean by that. Add reddit discussions to here? Add this site to reddit? Add some simple link to one from the other? Something else? [[Special:Contributions/172.70.162.163|172.70.162.163]] 13:02, 21 November 2024 (UTC)
::>Add some simple link to one from the other?
::I have no idea what they meant either, but I hadn't thought of this! I could see the addition of a simple link to the comic template, like "https://reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/{{PAGETITLE}" or "https://reddit.com/r/xkcd/search/?q={{PAGETITLE}"
::I don't partecipate much in the r/xkcd subreddit, so i'm not sure if they have structured post titles or even if they posted all the comics, or if it's automated, but I think this could be cool! Some people will likely come from Reddit, so it would be a straightforward way for them to go back. Thoughts? {{unsigned|FaviFake|16:55, 11 January 2025 (UTC)}}

== viewer ==
i propose to add random page to comic viewer {{unsigned ip|172.71.150.14|00:17, 25 February 2025 (UTC)}}
:There's already a "Random Page" link.
:If you mean (it's ambiguous!) a "Random Comic Page" link, then I'm not sure it's needed. There are so many "Comic pages" that it's a fairly good chance that you'll land on one of them for any given click, much more chance within two clicks. The likelihood of not getting a comic within ''three'' clicks will be tiny. Another way to do it is to just use the xkcd.com "Random" button, then (whichever comic you land on, which will be any but [[404]]), change the "xkcd.com" bit of the URL to "expxkcd.com" and... you end up here.
:If none of that really does what you want (especially if you mean something completely different from what I read it as), some more explanation would probably be appreciated. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.79.164|172.69.79.164]] 01:02, 25 February 2025 (UTC)
:If you want to make sure to land on all comics, you can go to "Special pages" on the sidebar, scroll down to "Random page in category", and enter "All comics". As far as I'm aware, there isn't really a way to automate this, so you have to keep inputting it manually. [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 06:38, 25 February 2025 (UTC)
::I think they meant a button on the {{tl|comic}} template. Would it be technically possible to make it such that it works exacly like the one on the official site? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:47, 25 February 2025 (UTC)
:::It ''should'' be a matter of using [[Special:RandomInCategory/All Comics]], I think, but doesn't seem to work when I try that exact attempt. Perhaps mediawiki or the mediawiki extension is not updated enough, or else I'm getting my wikisyntax slightly wrong.
:::Functionally, though, where the website has its Random button, we have our "go to the xkcd.com original", so more thought is needed before we just "add a button". If we do, we want it where the 'mothership' website does, but we still ought to have our details-and-link-to-original given, and I like it as a (faux) button.
::: Perhaps the {{template|comic}}, where it currently has header 'buttons':
[|<<] [Prev] [#9876 (Grune 32, 2525)] [Next] [>>|]
::: Needs to be changed to maybe:
[ #9876 (Grune 32, 2525) ]
[|<<] [Prev] [Random] [Next] [>>|]
:::...or equivalent. Haven't checked, but if it's a one-line table, can be easily made into a two-line one with colspan=3 (or 5?) in the right bit. If it's just centred, then it should come out Ok, in a simple way. But I'm not too keen on that change, really, and you'd need to actually have the Random->Comic link working first, ''anyway''. So I'm giving you my opinions and (slightly lacking) knowledge, in case that can at least make for the better outcome than either nothing (though not sure that's bad!) or some half-hearted ideas from elsewhere. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.86.116|172.70.86.116]] 21:52, 25 February 2025 (UTC)
:::: Unless someone can figure out the requests made by the random in category, a workaround could be to use a (pseudo)random number generator (mediawiki has a [https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Template:Random_number template] on their website) to get a random number in the range of 1 - {{template|LATESTCOMIC}} and put in a link to that comic number using <nowiki>[[number]]</nowiki>.
:::: Note: There already is a "Random" template, but it was just using random page and was blanked by the person who made it [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 03:50, 26 February 2025 (UTC)

:::::{{Done|Done!!!}}  I tried that wikimedia templaete but couldn't figure out how to make it work. I did it using Special:Random, hoping there aren't too many non-comic pages. Check [[{{LATESTCOMIC}}]] for an example of how it looks and works. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:02, 23 April 2025 (UTC)

::::::thanks! (i hav an account now) [[User:Bb777|me, hi]] ([[User talk:Bb777|talk]]) 22:30, 25 April 2025 (UTC)

:::::::No problem! There's also a special custom-designed navbar for the original comics: try clicking the "|<" button! (It's not complete yet, but i'm slowly finishing it!) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 22:36, 25 April 2025 (UTC)

== Contentious Topics Template ==

I propose that we create a unified template to slap on contentious and possibly controversial comics, with a warning similar to the one I (and a couple other people added on) wrote in [[3073: Tariffs]]. Now, since I don’t know how to create a template and don’t understand how they work, this is my request for help. If you are available to help write it or have any tips for me, please contact me either in this thread or on my [[User talk:42.book.addict|talk page]]. Thanks! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 18:01, 16 April 2025 (UTC)
:Hey, I just wanted to ask why you think a new template is needed. {{tl|notice2}} and {{tl|notice}} seem pretty solid. How would a new template differ from them? Btw, I switched the template in [[Talk:3073: Tariffs]] from {{tl|notice}} to {{tl|notice2}} so it's more like a warning, feel free to revert it if you prefer {{tl|notice}}. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:56, 17 April 2025 (UTC)
::I read the idea (which I'm not too enamoured with, but wouldn't argue against either) as being to create a <code><nowiki>{{contentious}}</nowiki></code>-like template in its own right that (perhaps by using {{template|notice2}} within it) had a standard "This comic, and its explanation, covers a particularly contentious subject. Take even more care than usual when adding to or editing this Explanation/Talk Page" (or similar) text with it.
::It would probably also have the ability to add further (or alternate) info, by standard template parameters, in case you want to personalise it to the ''exact''nature of the contention.
::But, my reasons why I didn't volunteer my ideas immediately are:
::*It paints targets. Anybody who wants to can look at all "pages using the Contentious template" and then troll-bomb them ''specifically''
::*Looking at the Tariffs-comic warning, that's ''huge'', and catering for that with a "standard text + additional notes" would be awkward... if you really believe it should be so huge in the first place,
::*Just by being so obviously available, there'd be creep. "Hey, this comic talks disparagingly about Newton's belief in alchemy... Surely that needs a warning too!", or start off with "Well, nobody's warning about our attitude to the US Senate in this comic, so I can be disparaging" which then practically forces another contentious-tagging (''possibly'' useful, but maybe in making a bolt for the barn door only ''after'' the horse has already made its own bolt through it) as it gets toned-down/-back again.
::And, though I also imagined the Tariff comic ''would'' get some push-back (there was some minor bits, but we seem to have kept it mature enough, IMO), it seems to be quiet. Can't say for sure it would have been without the warning it now has, but it survived ok before that was added. Hence why I'm ''meh'' about the very proposal. Hard cases make hard laws, and hard situations may prompt hard solutions. But I'm dubious about the actual case for the need. (As you say, we have 'freeform' notice+notice2, and I haven't seen proof even that was necessary as it was used.)
::But it would be trivial to implement, give or take some fine-tuning. I'll say that as a positive for the idea. Even if we never really use it as much as we could. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.216.83|162.158.216.83]] 20:35, 17 April 2025 (UTC)
:::Agreed. Maybe it's a good thing that we have to craft one for each comic we want to tag; this makes sure only actually contentious comics get tagged. An upside to having a specific template is that we wouldn't need to type <nowiki><noinclude></nowiki> every time, to avoid it displaying on the transcluded talk page.--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:00, 17 April 2025 (UTC)
::::mm. all of these are good points. now that i think about it, copy-pasting old warnings and tweaking them as needed is probably better than creating a new template. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 16:45, 18 April 2025 (UTC)

==Proposal for template page==
I was thinking that making a template page with instructions about what should and should not be included in which sections would make it easier for new editors to help. I have no idea how I would do this, though.[[User:BobcatInABox|BobcatInABox]] ([[User talk:BobcatInABox|talk]]) 11:49, 4 May 2025 (UTC)
:Which particular template? Many templates ''do'' contain instructions (from basic to rather thorough), and some common ones are also gone into in the FAQ page. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.91.245|172.70.91.245]] 20:25, 4 May 2025 (UTC)

== The newest stuff goes at top ==

I’ve been thinking the newest comments should go at top and replies are under the chose comment with a colon or more. Because every time someone makes a comment but not replying to you, you still get a message. So you only get notifications when someone replies to you. And the always get notifications not related to you is kind of annoying. [[User:Aprilfoolsupdate!|Aprilfoolsupdate!]] ([[User talk:Aprilfoolsupdate!|talk]]) 04:30, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
:(Ah, so you found it, before I even wrote my directions down on how to get here.)
:Not sure this helps.
:Firstly: Top-posting is <s>the work of the Devil... burn it! Burn it all!</s> very hard to read.
::A: Because it's in totally the wrong order.
::Q: Why is Top Posting bad?
:(Yes, I know you want top-posting ''threads'' but retain bottom-posting ''thread replies'', but can you even imagine the chaos involved with people not properly realising what's top- and what's bottom-posted. Or inter-posted into an existing hierarchy? Not with this 'flatfile' structure, anyway.)
:Secondly: Does this count for headers (like <code>== The newest stuff goes at top ==</code>)? For 'no-colon' starter comments under a Discussion header? For both?
:Thirdly: what are we doing with all the past ''pages and pages'' of things that are (more or less..) consistently chronological and bottom-posted? To make new additions work, someone (and probably ''before'' the first commentator who wants to add a brand new one-line witicism to the top of any multi-year-idle page) has to go into every Discussion page (and more?) to reshuffle it all by whatever Top(ish)-Post Criteria are adopted.
:Fourthly: It wouldn't even change how frequently you get notifications. (Actually, it might make it worse, as inveterate bottom-posters have to be 'corrected' by the followers of the 'new rule', as well as for any actually idle pages that get redone as part of the "thirdly" point.) But I don't think Notifications are clever enough to imagine that a new section ''above'' what you previously wrote doesn't possibly interest your registered "watch and notify" intent upon any given page.
:I have a Fifthly and Sixthly, too, but I assume I've made my general opinion quite clear. (And I noted that this is not the only Community Portal edit you made, just before arriving here. Will check the other in a moment.) [[Special:Contributions/172.68.229.142|172.68.229.142]] 06:19, 15 May 2025 (UTC)
::Never mind. I don’t even need to read the whole thing to know it is complicated. To many words {{unsigned|Aprilfoolsupdate|07:54, 15 May 2025 (UTC)}}

:::Short version: It's complicated, confusing and troublesome to change to. <u>And won't even solve your problem.</u> [[Special:Contributions/172.70.160.197|172.70.160.197]] 12:22, 15 May 2025 (UTC)

:::Agree with this message but disagree with the proposal. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:28, 18 May 2025 (UTC)

== By the Numbers ==

Greetings all,

So we all know that Randall numbers each XKCD comic with an ordinal number in a simple ascending sequence. I have become exceedingly intrigued by the particular properties of numbers now, especially their factors and primes. The most recent prime-numbered comic is [[3109]] and we'll soon see another one with [[3119]]. Does Randall ascribe any meaning or humor to the numbers that happen to appear as the posts play out? He certainly celebrates special dates! As a math-humor-based comic, there certainly must be jokes or surprises hidden therein. I'm not sure I've noticed any yet, though. [[386]] is certainly notorious, though doesn't seem to have a direct sort of Intel connection. [[42]] is unremarkable.

I once read a novel with an autistic protagonist, and each chapter was assigned a prime number. I will henceforth be on the lookout for interesting numerical happenstance as Randall continues to post! Anyone else? [[User:Elizium23|Elizium23]] ([[User talk:Elizium23|talk]]) 08:56, 12 July 2025 (UTC)

== Misc pages ==
I would like to propose the creation of an additional category for "miscellaneous pages" that aren't really comics, and which generally have a URL slug that's an English word or phrase instead of a number. This includes xkcd.com/YES and xkcd.com/NO, both of which currently have articles. It also includes these ones:

::''[Note by User:FaviFake: I organised this section and moved the links below]''

...and others as they are found or recovered. If only we could access the forum thread mentioned on the YES and NO pages! I was able to find a link to the thread here, but it's inaccessible. A
It's the one labeled "Hidden pages on xkcd": [https://web.archive.org/web/20170927200737/http://forums.xkcd.com/viewforum.php?f=2&sid=973b8a1dcd0a727a9177aa757108d4f6&start=250]. I was able to find the pages above via Reddit: [https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/gixd96/what_are_all_the_hidden_pages_on_xkcd_that_you/] [https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/35whzf/what/] --[[User:Rumbling7145|Rumbling7145]] ([[User talk:Rumbling7145|talk]]) 00:16, 11 March 2025 (UTC)

Update: I got into the forum page! [https://web.archive.org/web/20151206001238/http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=110093] We can now add these pages to the list:
[[User:Rumbling7145|Rumbling7145]] ([[User talk:Rumbling7145|talk]]) 23:37, 11 March 2025 (UTC)
<span id="List of pages"></span>
===Pages===
* http://xkcd.com/yes {{Done|Created: [[YES]]}}
** http://xkcd.com/no {{Done|Created: [[NO]]}}

* http://xkcd.com/nakedpictures {{Done|Created: [[nakedpictures]]}}

* http://xkcd.com/spiral {{Done|Created: [[spiral]]}}
**Likely a reference to [[1488: Flowcharts]] (Which links to Spiral) and [[2322: ISO Paper Size Golden Spiral]], spirals above images of people and things

* http://xkcd.com/burlap {{Done|Created: [[Burlap]]}}

* http://xkcd.com/simplewriter {{Done|Created: [[Simple Writer]]}}
**Tool to Write Like [[Up Goer Five]] and [[Thing Explainer]]

* http://xkcd.com/tree_prank
**This is so funny

* http://xkcd.com/blue_eyes.html {{Done|Existing: [[Blue Eyes]]}}
** http://xkcd.com/solution.html, the solution to the problem (also found on [[Blue Eyes]]

* http://xkcd.com/morphs ([https://web.archive.org/web/20130313175333/http://xkcd.com:80/morphs/ archive only] — [https://web.archive.org/web/20060219184352/http://www.xkcd.com:80/morphs/ earlier version with more text])
**"Using several pieces of imaging software, including Photoshop and an image morphing program, I make composite photos of people."

* http://xkcd.com/chesscoaster
**"People playing chess on roller coasters, inspired by this comic:" image

* http://xkcd.com/kite
**"These are pictures I took by hanging cameras from kites, a hobby I've played with on and off over the years"

*https://xkcd.com/kite/kite_trick.jpg

* http://xkcd.com/dot {{Done|Created: [[dot]]}}

* http://xkcd.com/election ([https://web.archive.org/web/20141014075718/http://xkcd.com/election/ archive only])
**Used by randall for tracking elections, "it's the fastest analysis of the state of the race minute-by-minute".

* http://xkcd.com/event {{Done|Created: [[event]]}} (I still don't quite get it)
**There's an image on this site that a web browser fails to load, but when downloaded, Windows Photo Viewer can view the image.

* http://xkcd.com/now (redirect to [[1335: Now]])

* http://xkcd.com/plus {{Done|Created: [[plus]]}}

* http://xkcd.com/sub ([https://web.archive.org/web/20130111054027/http://xkcd.com/sub/ archive only]) — "The Sub Project", a long explanation of how Randall and others build submarines?

* http://xkcd.com/temp ([https://web.archive.org/web/20061219193846/http://www.xkcd.com/temp/ archive only])
**This is super interesting! It lists other sub-directories. [https://web.archive.org/web/*/http://www.xkcd.com/temp/* These are the ones that survived in the archive]:
**http://xkcd.com/temp/email.txt ([https://web.archive.org/web/20100305065807/http://xkcd.com/temp/email.txt archive only]) — Seems to be an email exchange between Randall and someone else?
**http://xkcd.com:80/temp/euphoria.txt ([https://web.archive.org/web/20160401222138id_/http://xkcd.com:80/temp/euphoria.txt archive only]) — This says "<Sphere> Ok, that last Randall who said 'to clarify' was actually Randall, but pretty much none of the others were. Also no Sphere after this gets linked in chat a second time is actually Randall either. Randall is probably not there."
**https://xkcd.com/temp/evidenceofidentity.txt ([https://web.archive.org/web/20201118232320/https://xkcd.com/temp/evidenceofidentity.txt archive only]) — "[Randall] Hello to everyone who waited in line to say hi to me on my How To book tour and specifically mentioned this chat!<br>[Sierra] Hello mr. probably not the real Randall :D [...]"
***The rest are all images:
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/baby_mop.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070127045748/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/baby_mop.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/darthswingset.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070127045624/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/darthswingset.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/deb6d13b50a581304bac385c463b09c1.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070225103228/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/deb6d13b50a581304bac385c463b09c1.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/Hacker%20Grave.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070213182708/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/Hacker%20Grave.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/hotornot.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20061219194445/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/hotornot.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/how_rumors_start_office.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070111000437/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/how_rumors_start_office.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/owned.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070228031547/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/owned.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/shark.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20061214082834/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/shark.jpg archive only])
**http://www.xkcd.com/temp/humor/you_cannot_pass.jpg ([https://web.archive.org/web/20070323001005/http://www.xkcd.com:80/temp/humor/you_cannot_pass.jpg archive only])

* http://xkcd.com/test ([https://web.archive.org/web/20170510061033/https://xkcd.com/test/ archive only])
**This appears identical to the regular xkcd.com homepage, it returns a 404 as of today

* http://xkcd.com/time (redirect to comic [[1190: Time]])

* http://xkcd.com/twitter (redirect to https://x.com/xkcd)

* http://xkcd.com/cyborg.txt
**Interesting script. According to [https://blog.xkcd.com/2008/05/20/gps-cyborg-implant/ an old blag article], it is "a short Python script that uses a USB GPS device under Linux to help with navigation. It doesn’t have maps or anything — it just gives distances and, while you’re moving, the direction to the destination (as in 'two o’clock'). It prints this info on the terminal and speaks it using speech synthesis."

* http://xkcd.com/channel.html ([https://web.archive.org/web/20141011002528/https://xkcd.com/channel.html archive only])
**I have no idea what this it. It's full of gibberish and Chinese text.

* http://xkcd.com/channel.txt ([https://web.archive.org/web/20141014083026/http://xkcd.com/channel.txt archive only])
** Same as above, but it downloads the file to the PC.

* http://xkcd.com/me.txt ([https://web.archive.org/web/20141014101900/http://xkcd.com:80/me.txt archive only])
**Only says "I am not in 1110.n01se.net anymore". [https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/5tqrew/xkcd_secret_page/ Learn more in this Reddit thread], in this [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvLxOVYeo5w YouTube video of how it used to work], and in the [https://github.com/n01se/1110 GitHub for 1110.n01se.net]. I'm assuming Randall wanted to say that anyone who tries to impersonate him in the future isn't him?

* http://xkcd.com/why.txt ([https://web.archive.org/web/20180729163548/https://xkcd.com/why.txt archive only])
**Contains 33 THOUSAND "why" questions. May be related to [[1256: Questions]]? Very interesting!

* http://xkcd.com/bitcoin {{Done|Existing: [[Bitcoin address]]}}
**There's also this one, which we have dissected on the page [[Bitcoin address]] (very interesting read!)

* http://holistic.xkcd.com ([https://web.archive.org/web/20160304031258/http://holistic.xkcd.com/ archive only])
**"The XKCD Holistic Browser. Because we are all one. Type a web address and you'll be taken to one typed by someone else."

* https://aram.xkcd.com ([https://web.archive.org/web/20110816163403/http://aram.xkcd.com/ archive only])
**"This page is regenerated every day and may be NSFW. It shows a random result from a Google image search for IMG_????.jpg plus a random caption:" Seems it stopped working completely after a few years and got stuck one image&caption. Aram inspired [[Black Hat]], see his page for more.

* https://xkcd.com/verizon/ {{Done|Created: [[verizon]]}}

* http://mail.xkcd.com ([https://web.archive.org/web/20120321204721/http://mail.xkcd.com/ archive only])
**Seems Randall set it up but never used it.

* https://xkcd.com/personal
**There was a /personal folder on xkcd, but it's been entirely wiped https://web.archive.org/web/*/https://xkcd.com/personal/*

*https://xkcd.com/ngram-charts/ {{Done|Created: [[ngram charts]]}}
**Still online, but the images are missing even in [https://web.archive.org/web/20120225171410/http://xkcd.com:80/ngram-charts the archive]. "Some of the interesting charts I've come across while using Google Books ngrams (which analyzes the frequency of word use in their scanned books corpus over time)"

* https://xkcd.com/color/rgb/
** https://xkcd.com/color/rgb.txt

* http://68.57.186.221:8080/ ([https://web.archive.org/web/20041024201125/http://68.57.186.221:8080/ archive only])
** xkcd.com redirected to this at some points during 2004, this capture is from October 24th of 2004 specifically.

* https://throw.xkcd.com (only available [https://web.archive.org/web/20200919232527/throw.xkcd.com/ in the archive])
**This was likely hacked, see [https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/iw9jsg/throwxkcdcom/ this Reddit thread]: ''"I emailed the xkcd.com webmaster, it was a testing URL he forgot to shut down. It's fixed now."''

* https://c.xkcd.com
**This is mostly all for comics with dynamic content. There are many subpages, see [https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/j54lx3/does_anyone_know_what_cxkcdcom_is/ this reddit thread].
**https://c.xkcd.com/xb/feed
**http://c.xkcd.com/random/comic (redirects to random comic)
**https://c.xkcd.com/graph/1
**[https://www.reddit.com/r/xkcd/comments/j54lx3/does_anyone_know_what_cxkcdcom_is/ There are others].

* https://static.xkcd.com/ (404, not in archive. [http://web.archive.org/web/*/https://static.xkcd.com/* archived subpages])
** http://static.xkcd.com/bl.png ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070912213845/http://static.xkcd.com/bl.png archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/br.png ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070912213841/http://static.xkcd.com/br.png archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/favicon.ico ([http://web.archive.org/web/20071208203917/http://static.xkcd.com/favicon.ico archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/general.css ([http://web.archive.org/web/20071208203917/http://static.xkcd.com/general.css archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/ieonly.css ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070911163429/http://static.xkcd.com/ieonly.css archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/ml.png ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070912213838/http://static.xkcd.com/ml.png archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/mr.png ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070912213832/http://static.xkcd.com/mr.png archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/tl.png ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070912213828/http://static.xkcd.com/tl.png archive only])
** http://static.xkcd.com/tr.png ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070912213835/http://static.xkcd.com/tr.png archive only])
** http://www.static.xkcd.com/robots.txt ([http://web.archive.org/web/20070501000000*/http://www.static.xkcd.com/robots.txt archive only])
** https://almamater.xkcd.com/ ([http://web.archive.org/web/20130402215109/https://almamater.xkcd.com/ archive only])
:: https://almamater.xkcd.com/ ([http://web.archive.org/web/20150209005631/https://almamater.xkcd.com/ archive only])
:: and errors out: https://almamater.xkcd.com/ ([http://web.archive.org/web/20160528035956/https://almamater.xkcd.com/ archive only, errors out])
*** http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv ([http://web.archive.org/web/20130511122543/http://almamater.xkcd.com/best.csv archive only])
***See comic [[1193: Externalities]]
{{misc page}}
You can monitor the pages that are using this template (so the brand new webpage explanations) by going to [[Special:WhatLinksHere/Template:misc_page]]

===How should we treat them?===
This is great! I think we should first create an article for each of them, and after we have a few articles then we can start to figure out a good name for the category and answer some questions, like:

*Should we add a new parameter to the template for these non-comics? To do that, we would have to ask an admin to edit the {{tl|comic}} template to allow us to do that. We can ask Kynde, no big deal.

*Some pages, like [[Blue Eyes]] and [[Bitcoin address]] are already in other categories, like [[:Category:Extra comics]] and [[:Category:Design of xkcd.com]]. Should we use the existing categories, or add a new one? How do we distinguish between, for example, [[Blue Eyes]], [[Bitcoin address]], and [[YES]], which are all in theory "misc pages".

*Where should the new category be categorised?

*What title should we give for explanations of pages that don't have a name, like xkcd.com/dot? That one is just titled "xkcd.com/dot", unlike pages like Blue Eyes and [[YES]]. Would it become "dot", "Dot", something else? Should we keep it coherent or base ourselves solely on the rendered title on the official site?

I love the idea! I currently don't have time, but I will create these pages eventually. If anyone else wants to chime in, please do! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:11, 11 March 2025 (UTC)

:"Unnumbered publications", or similar, could cover ''anything'' that wasn't xkcd.com/<digits>. Wouldn't cover replacements ([[2642: No One Was Hurt]] was originally 2642, for example), but that's a different class from deliberately off-series items. Also, given that often they are entirely non-image (the Yes and No), or straight text and multi-image (as per Blue Eyes, or other articles with a WhatIf-ish feel to them), I think calling them "comic"s is stretching the term.
:Though "miscellaneous pages" sort of covers this, I've a feeling that there's at least one... 'entity'... that is built upon multiple actual 'pages', but the list of candidates above doesn't contain any that look like they're what I'm vaguely thinking of. (Neither was it anything like the xkcd survey, or other interactive (numbered) comics, but maybe I'll bring it back to mind sooner rather than later.)
:As to the use of {{template|comic}}, I think we could spring to a (modified, 'inspired-by') template specifically for all these no-number/off-sequence explanation headers. Either explicit "prev=" and "next=" (per comic, ''could'' get quite mixed up if not kept uncontradictory) or a "position=" which could help maintain a list (and, from that, an auto-generated first/prev/next/last 'page ring') without having to subvert expectations of fitting in with the normal [[Template:LATESTCOMIC]] system.
:With the Comic template already equipped to deal with "no-number 'comics'", there wouldn't (in the first instance) be much work needed to "decomic" the new copy, with the exact method of resequencing (if desired) as a parallel series being the biggest question. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.49|172.70.85.49]] 17:20, 11 March 2025 (UTC)

::I'm not sure what the last sentenc means, but I like the idea of a new template! However, I don't think we should call the category "Unnumbered publications". Isn't that just [[:Category:Extra comics]] but without comics [[Disappearing Sunday Update]] and [[No One Was Hurt]]? We should establish a criterion to add pages to this category and then figure out a name i think. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:42, 12 March 2025 (UTC)

On this subject, is there any reason why it's [[YES]] and [[NO]] (currently the valid links) rather than [[Yes]] and [[No]] / [[yes]] and [[no]] (currently invalid links)? And I don't mean "why aren't there redirects?", which I don't even think is the right way of resolving this, but what was the thinking? (Which then didn't result in [[DOT]], etc, so there's ''definitely'' some inconsistency, one way or another.) [[Special:Contributions/172.68.205.92|172.68.205.92]] 21:54, 17 March 2025 (UTC)

:I don't see inconsistencies. The name of the browser tab for the yes page is "YES" by Randall, same for NO. Instead, the page for [[dot]] is called "xkcd.com/dot/". We could use that, but that's likely not what Randall intended and might have been a coding oversight. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:01, 18 March 2025 (UTC)

I've created the {{tl|misc page}} template for these pages and removed the incomplete template until we reach consensus on what to do with them. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:40, 11 May 2025 (UTC)

Ahem, I'd like to remind everyone that they can feel free to comment on the best way to manage these. Or if they should be included in the wiki at all. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:38, 17 August 2025 (UTC)

What if we just create a subcategory for These. It is xkcd so it should belong here. Should not be in the random queue but something like a button to get to these. {{unsigned ip|216.125.50.226|16:51, 18 March 2026 (UTC)}}

=== New page "Spiral" ===

I found a new page at [http://xkcd.com/spiral xkcd/spiral]. what should I do? Thanks!
This is my first post, sorry it's not formatted correctly. -- [[Special:Contributions/73.169.159.188|73.169.159.188]] 00:27, 12 October 2025‎

: Welcome. Good find! Any suggestions? -- [[User:Dtgriscom|Dtgriscom]] ([[User talk:Dtgriscom|talk]]) 01:47, 12 October 2025 (UTC)
::I've moved this over to Coordination and uploaded all images on spiral. I'll be making the page soon. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 05:04, 12 October 2025 (UTC)
:::Moving to correct location where we're discussing these pages. More discussion about how we should treat them is welcome! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:00, 13 October 2025 (UTC)

=== [[:Category:Extra pages]] ===
I've created a category called Extra pages for all of these pages. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 03:14, 5 November 2025 (UTC)
:So, right now we have "Category:Extra pages" ''and'' "Category:Extra comics". Some ''are'' unnumbered comics (plus at least one "was a number, then replaced") and some are 'merely' pages (with possible a fuzzy line between for 'pages' that show images-that-aren't-comics), perhaps we should be consistent between which are which, and how they relate to 'standard' numbered comics.
:For example, being an Extra Comics was (officially, but you could also manually add it) initiated by the "extra=yes" param to {{template|comic}}. This also (theoretically, problems with the randomness backend aside) adds them to the Random Comics link-choice, ''without'' adding them to the Comic List numbers (such that it states "we have #### comics", where #### should not be different from the latest comic number, as recently established).
:Perhaps:
:*Make the comic template accept "extra=comic" or "extra=page", instead of "extra=yes".
:**Perhaps "extra=yes" 'remains' to default to one or the other? ...nah, just make sure all the current "=yes" ones are assigned beforehand.
:**"extra=no" just defaults back to behaviour without any "extra=" at all, of course, pretty much as currently.
:*Each of these new distinctions assigns to the 'Extra' category that fits it, but keeps it out of the All (numbered) Comics list, as being not numbered (and some not being 'comics')
:*Either ''just'' keep Extra Comics feeding to the Random Comic list (All Comics+Extra Comics, as we've painstakingly set it up to do, recently) or ''also'' include Extra Pages (it being AC+EC+EP in the Special:Random target list/whatever). TBD, depends upon whether you like a strictly "non-comic page" potentially popping up as a 'treat' for people.
:...that's all a ''little'' extra work. Some of which I could probably do right now (though maybe some pages are Protected against my input, haven't checked), but I think this needs discussion before doing any actual refining of the current setup.
:Might have been better to have proposed and discussed the Extra Pages details before starting that, too, but I'm happy to use this setup as a stepping stone given that it's been done already. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.89|82.132.244.89]] 14:20, 5 November 2025 (UTC)

=== Update on ngrams ===

The images on the ngrams page appear to be generated dynamically. The original URLs are broken, but can be restored by changing "/chart" to "/graph". This doesn't fix the HTML page, but it does render each of the 58 URLs accessible - see below.

All graphs default to a corpus from 2009. Note that some graphs, such as the one noted "cherry picking" below, look very different using a more recent corpus.

* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=President+Lincoln%2CPresident+Roosevelt%2CPresident+Kennedy%2CPresident+Johnson%2CPresident+Nixon%2CPresident+Reagan%2CPresident+Bush&year_start=1780&year_end=2008&corpus=5&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=fuck&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=the+Great+War%2Cthe+World+War%2CWorld+War+I&year_start=1900&year_end=2000&corpus=0&smoothing=2
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=christian%2Cchristianity&year_start=1700&year_end=2000&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=aliens%2C+predators&year_start=1750&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=explosion+in+popularity&year_start=1900&year_end=2000&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=blue+line&year_start=1960&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=upward+trend&year_start=1960&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=gay%2Clesbian%2Cbisexual&year_start=1940&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Leviticus+18%2Cturn+the+other+cheek&year_start=1960&year_end=2000&corpus=5&smoothing=3 (cherry-picking)
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=vegetarian&year_start=1750&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=drunk&year_start=1750&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=television%2C+tuberculosis&year_start=1750&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=love%2Chope%2Cfaith%2C+sex&year_start=1750&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=hope&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=6&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=entomology%2Cetymology&year_start=1900&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=carriage%2Ccar%2Cautomobile&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=irregardless%2Cregardlessly%2Cunregarding&year_start=1800&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=a+bird+in+the+hand%2Clive+by+the+sword%2Clook+before+you+leap%2Ca+penny+saved&year_start=1780&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=war&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Muslim%2CMoslem%2CMoslim%2CMussulman%2C+Moslam&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Empire%2C+empire&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=6&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=decline%2Cprogress&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=6&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=progress&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=6&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=war&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Rapture&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=history%2Cpast%2Cfuture&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Star+Wars%2C+Star+Trek&year_start=1950&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=0
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Jesus+Christ&year_start=1720&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=President&year_start=1780&year_end=2008&corpus=5&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=tyranny&year_start=1700&year_end=2000&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=power+to+the+people&year_start=1700&year_end=2000&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=flag&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=4&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=end+of+the+world&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Bible+study&year_start=1800&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=God+bless+America&year_start=1800&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=merry+Christmas%2Chappy+holidays&year_start=1960&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Space&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=old+fashioned&year_start=1750&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=sword%2C+gun&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=pirate&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Ayn+Rand&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Marx&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Marx%2C+Marxy%2C+Marxist%2C+Marxiest&year_start=1850&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=0
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=communism%2Ccommunist%2Csocialist&year_start=1830&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=1
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=Russia%2C+USSR&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=0
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=savior%2CSavior&year_start=1720&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=trend&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=girly&year_start=1900&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=restroom%2C+bathroom%2C+toilet&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=pursuit+of+happiness&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=telechart%2Ctelephone%2Ctelegram%2Ctelevision%2Cradio%2Cinternet&year_start=1840&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=king&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=science&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=decade&year_start=1780&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=thousand&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=hundred%2Cthousand%2Cmillion%2Cbillion%2Ctrillion&year_start=1700&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3
* http://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=jillion%2Czillion%2Cbazillion%2Ckazillion&year_start=1900&year_end=2008&corpus=0&smoothing=3

[[User:Rumbling7145|Rumbling7145]] ([[User talk:Rumbling7145|talk]]) 16:14, 10 March 2026 (UTC)

==Visual Editor?==
I, being a nerd in high school, edit on more than just this wiki. For example, I edit on Wikipedia. On Wikipedia, the default editing mode is a visual editor, which automatically converts your wikitext into the final product in real time. It's useful on many levels, and would save all of us a lot of time (I've spent at least 2 hours total fixing broken wikitext). I feel that using this tool would increase overall productivity in the wiki, and probably lessen the amount of people who are intimidated when attempting to edit, allowing more people to join and contribute to the community. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[Special:Contributions/DollarStoreBa'al|'''''My life choices''''']] 22:43, 7 August 2025 (UTC)

:Good luck telling that to jeff! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 12:22, 8 August 2025 (UTC)

::Ugh. Well, he's gotta come back eventually, right? He's paying for the domain, after all. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[Special:Contributions/DollarStoreBa'al|'''''My life choices''''']] 16:43, 8 August 2025 (UTC)

:::Or maybe he just forgot and we actually don't want him to come back. Who knows! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:45, 11 August 2025 (UTC)

::::Name one person who wants Jeff to just not come back. Either way, I want him back, and I suggested this just in case. This would also be really cool for me, as I joined after jeff's last known user page edit in 2018. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[Special:Contributions/DollarStoreBa'al|'''''My life choices''''']] 23:31, 14 August 2025 (UTC)

:::::Jeez that was a joke. Ofc I want him back lol. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:09, 15 August 2025 (UTC)

::::::still no response from Jeff or any of his friends on: Reddit, X/Twitter; GitHub; Bluesky; Mastodon; and email. Oh, and I asked some person on YouTube with the username lcarsos (as in the other 'crat on here) but I think that he deleted my comment on his video (multiple times). (just a little fyi) '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 18:17, 19 August 2025 (UTC)

:::::::Does he even remember this? Maybe they all got struck by lightning at the same time while calling someone who just sneezed and saying 'bless you'. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 16:28, 29 August 2025 (UTC)

==Unicode emoji support==
This suggestion was made in response to the discussion above. I was completely unable to realize that FaviFake was joking. I feel that Unicode emojis would drastically improve the wiki and allow for more detailed conveyance of thoughts and feelings, and prevent catastrophic misunderstandings not unlike the one above. Other people have insulted me due to the fact that I was unable to convey enough emotion. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:12pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[Special:Contributions/DollarStoreBa'al|'''''My life choices''''']] 17:18, 19 August 2025 (UTC)
:Text-only media, like this, always has the issue of not being understood, but if someone forgets (or consciously declines) to put a "/s" or ";)" in there, they'll probably also not add an emoji.
:Of course, one person's very dry humour might go so far over the head of another person that not even a strong hint helps, whereas another's sense of fun might be so obvious that gilding the lilly even sends the ''wrong'' message about it. [[Special:Contributions/92.23.2.228|92.23.2.228]] 20:03, 19 August 2025 (UTC)
: I don't understand your suggestion. 😕 The site appears to allow such emojis to be included; I just copied and pasted. There's also the HTML entity option, e.g. <code>&#128533;</code>. 😕 Or are you asking that the site include code to make it easier to insert emojis? [[User:BunsenH|BunsenH]] ([[User talk:BunsenH|talk]]) 16:57, 29 August 2025 (UTC)

== Custom User-based Signature Template ==

DollarStoreBa'al and I came up with a pretty interesting idea: a template called "sig" that can hold the signatures of other users. This is to allow users to have signatures longer than 255 characters, which is the hard limit set by MediaWiki. To call the template, we can use <nowiki>{{sig|User:XYZ}}</nowiki> and encode the template with wikitext so that each user's signature can be pasted in without confusion. To make things even easier, users can adjust their signatures in Preferences to call this template so that the 4 tildes (<nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>) can still be employed. If enough positive feedback is received, I would love to work on it with the community. If anybody is interested in helping out, please mention it! The template could also function as a signature museum, where you can view other user's custom signatures and get inspiration. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 16:50, 29 August 2025 (UTC)
:Update. I have found another solution. By creating a sig page, you can call <nowiki>{{User:XYZ/sig}}</nowiki>, which enables you to literally copy-paste whatever's in that page into another page. This was first discovered, I believe, by [[User:Omega/sig|User:Omega]]. I don't believe we need the template anymore, but the signature museum would still be cool! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:9pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#89CFF0">4</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">2</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">.</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">b</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">o</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">o</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">k</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">.</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">a</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">d</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">d</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">i</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">c</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">t</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:6pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#89CFF0">T</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">a</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">l</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">k</span><span style="color:#89CFF0"> </span><span style="color:#89CFF0">t</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">o</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3"> </span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">m</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">e</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">!</span></span>]]</sup>''' 19:10, 29 August 2025 (UTC)
::Not quite sure what it will do. Seems to me that for instance you and [[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> already have very advanced signatures (using Dollar's here as another example). My own preferences would be a normal signature, where it is easy to see who has made the comment and where the links takes me... But since you can already make this complicated signatures anyway, I'm not as such opposed to the idea. Am I correct in assuming I need to do something in order for this to be possible as the only active admin at the moment? As I will not come by here regularly, then let me know when there has been some relevant activity. Not just a reply to these questions here. But once some other than you two has chimed in. Else I might forget to come back to look! (I wrote this and then had an edit conflict with 42. So maybe this is not relevant anymore? But I will post it now none the less. But this was as a reply to the first proposal) [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 19:16, 29 August 2025 (UTC)
:::Hi Kynde. Yes, I believe that we don't need your assistance anymore. The need for a template is erased by the existence of /sig pages, and we can create a museum by ourselves. Thanks for trying and chiming in, though! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:9pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#89CFF0">4</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">2</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">.</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">b</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">o</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">o</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">k</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">.</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">a</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">d</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">d</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">i</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">c</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">t</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:6pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#89CFF0">T</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">a</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3">l</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">k</span><span style="color:#89CFF0"> </span><span style="color:#89CFF0">t</span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">o</span><span style="color:#D3D3D3"> </span><span style="color:#FFB7CE">m</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">e</span><span style="color:#89CFF0">!</span></span>]]</sup>''' 19:18, 29 August 2025 (UTC)
::::I do believe the template would work fine... that way it wouldn't show the full wikitext of the signature. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 19:46, 29 August 2025 (UTC)
bad bad bad bad idea, the sig character limit is 255 for a reason, see {{w|WP:SIGLENGTH}}.

a sig template is an even worse idea, because every instance of it will call #ifexist, an [https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Manual:$wgExpensiveParserFunctionLimit expensive parser function]. these make a page take even longer to load, which this wiki definitely does not need. also, expensive fucntions are capped at 500, so you're making a maximum of 500 signatures (not counting other templates). [[user:lett‪herebedarklight|raeb]] 04:50, 30 August 2025 (UTC)
:As well as the WP:SIGLENGTH bit, if anybody actually cares about the precedent set by 'mother Wikipedia' then various other dos-and-don'ts from {{w|Wikipedia:Signatures}} might well apply to some extant personal signatures, from the "don't make it look like it's not your signature" through to being inconsiderate of the colour-blind and those otherwise vision-limited.
:It also gives some nice demonstrations of what ''can'' be done (within reason). Though I still say that just because you can do something doesn't mean that you should. "Looks complicated, codes simply" would be my suggestion. Elegance of spirit, not a bloomin' juggernaut, if you're inclined to take my advice at all. You can still use personally distinctive signatures, and probably should. (Though, quite possibly, by the middle of next week, half the latest Talk comments are going to have orange-background. Don't care about that possibility, as much as I's like having vaguely recognisable namepage and timestamp bits to it that don't take effort to discern properly ''either'' when rendered ''or'' in raw code.) I have simple tastes, perhaps more than others... [[Special:Contributions/82.132.247.193|82.132.247.193]] 05:45, 30 August 2025 (UTC)
:Fully agree with raeb here, the last thing we need is more server load.
:*If you transclude them, then there's the server load and maximum transclusion problem.
:*If you substitute the template each time, the issue of hard-to-parse editing views gets worse. It's already annoying having to mentally "remove" your html codes when adding a comment, and we also don't have the VE, which would hide the code. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 13:52, 31 August 2025 (UTC)
::I got edit conflicted, dangit. Anyway, both your complaints are either invalid or could easily be solved. The #ifexist limit could easily be bypassed if we simply delete the signatures of people who haven't contributed in, say, 6 months. The wikitext complaint is also invalid. Using the template as a signature would simply show <nowiki>{{User:XYZ/Sig}}</nowiki>, '''not the wikitext required to display the signature.''' Sincerely, --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 14:14, 3 September 2025 (UTC)
:::Hi
simply delete the signatures of people who haven't contributed in, say, 6 months
:::''What?!''
:::Also, my 1st point wasn't mainly about #ifexist but about server load. It's as if you were adding the amount of code roughly equivalent to {{tl|incomplete}} to every single page you commented on, multiple times on the same page. This absolutely causes a ton of unnecessary server load. Imagine adding {{tl|incomplete}} hundreds of times to dozens and dozens of talk pages across the entire wiki. The software needs to keep all of them up-to-date. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:47, 3 September 2025 (UTC)
::::What's wrong with deleting signatures? They can just make a new one, and 6 months seems like a good cutoff for 'they aren't coming back.' I know Tori was away for more than 6 months, she's an exception. The server load is an issue though. Maybe we need to wait for that until Jeff is able to fix the current server issues. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 17:26, 3 September 2025 (UTC)
:::::I randomly drop in every 6–12 months, for what it's worth. [[User:Maplestrip|Maplestrip]] ([[User talk:Maplestrip|talk]]) 13:52, 5 September 2025 (UTC)
:::Why penalize people who only occasionally contribute? What does it buy us? -- [[User:Dtgriscom|Dtgriscom]] ([[User talk:Dtgriscom|talk]]) 17:49, 3 September 2025 (UTC)
::::DSB, the Template is a horrible idea, ok? I slept on it and after further reflection, it really doesn't add much. People can always subst in signatures through <nowki>{{_}}</nowki>, and it'll also strain the server way too much. There's also a reason why sigs are capped at 255 characters-it'll become impossible to read talk pages if everyone had hulking 1000+ character sigs (like the one that I created). Please stop fixating so much on this specific idea. Also, it is quite rude to penalize people who only occasionally edit (and I don't want to be a special case or something like that-please stop treating me as some godly figure who is better than everyone else.) '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:pink">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#B1E4E3">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 19:02, 3 September 2025 (UTC)
:::::Yeah, you're right. The 255 character limit stands. Thread over, back to explaining. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 14:46, 4 September 2025 (UTC)

== Explain XKCD Discord/Social Media Server? ==

I was experiencing Cloudflare errors in the past 24 hours that had prevented me from accessing this website. It's working now, but I'm worried that something else would happen again. Would anybody be interested in organizing a group chat/server or something of the like outside of Explain XKCD? I would personally love if it was on Discord, as it's easy to use, convenient, is built great, and I use it often. If anybody else has suggestions, I'd be open to hear them! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 20:24, 12 September 2025 (UTC)
:Me too. It greatly worried me. If you want, I can set up a discord server. Personally, I prefer discord as it's very simple and has a clean interface. Again, only if you're interested. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 15:38, 15 September 2025 (UTC)
::[https://discord.com/invite/zGEVanBBAx Here you go!] '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 00:38, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::NICE! I wonder if we should message Kynde and see if he'll add it to the global messages. The more people, the better. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 01:17, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::I didn't want to influence your original choice, but it would have been nice if you'd have chosen something less 'commercial', as a platform. Hope it helps, just don't forget about everyone else! [[Special:Contributions/82.132.238.131|82.132.238.131]] 09:07, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
::::Discord is free. I feel it should be easy for everybody to join, even if they didn't already have discord. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 12:53, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::::"Freemium" would be a better description, with all the Nitro-mandating stuff. But I already deleted my more specific past observations about all that. And see no point in resurrecting my original Discord presence as you probably can do more chatting about the rest of us without too many random strangers like me turning up, whatever the other IP-onlies decide to do. ;) [[Special:Contributions/82.132.246.82|82.132.246.82]] 17:18, 17 September 2025 (UTC)

===Updating the global message board===
::''Moved from [[User_talk:Kynde#Updating_the_global_message_board]]'' [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:40, 16 September 2025 (UTC)

I am excited to announce that explainxkcd now has a discord server! I was wondering if you could add it to the global message board (idk what it's called, actually. The one with the incomplete explanations message.) to include the discord invite link? The more people who join, the better, just in case cloudflare decides to have those issues again. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 13:01, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:Hi. you did not include the link? Also I would like to know if other frequent editors think this is a great idea? Not all who edit here wish to be contactable on other platforms. I do understand where you wish the message to be though, and if this is a good idea we can put it there. I'm not certain what other people thinks though? --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 13:12, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
::I, for one, think it's a good idea. It's managed by Tori, so it's in very good hands. The only thing I'm afraid of is that discussions may not take place here, but I don't think that's enough of a reason not to promote it.
::The link is at [[User:42.book.addict]], in the second notice. I think we should say something like
In case this site goes down, we have created a Discord server as an emergency form of communication. (link)
::We aren't "excited to announce" a backup form of communication. Discussions must be public, not on external sites. This is merely a backup. I think it can then be removed from the sitenotice after a month or less, and mentioned on another page somewhere else, discretely. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:23, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::Thanks for chiming in FaviFake. Can you find a good place for this, because I would like to link to a local page from the sitenotice. I do realize that people will have to go to this discord before problems arises, but I guess that is the way it ism and that wont change no matter how we announce it. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 15:49, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
::::But 42 does intend for this to be used as "a fun place to connect with each other". Leaving it discrete would make it impossible for this to happen, because people won't see it. Also, for the record, FaviFake, 42 and I were. Multiple people. Me and her. That's how the English language works. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 16:41, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::::Yes you two are the ones who wishes for it and FaviFake was the first to chime in. Don't patronize me please! --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 16:44, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::::I have no idea what you're saying regarding the "English language", but please refrain from saying... whatever that was.
But 42 does intend for this to be used as "a fun place to connect with each other"
:::::Could you stop talking on behalf of 42? I believe you've been asked many times not to do that. You can either tell us what '''you''' think, or let others speak for themselves. 42 isn't a goddess and is able to engage in this conversation without someone "defending" her opinions.
:::::I'll create [[explain xkcd:Discord]] but need to think more about how this is supposed to be pitched. I do not want people to be incentivised to use a private, inaccessible discord server to, for example, talk about the newest comic. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:32, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::::I moved this discussions back here because it's relevant to the entire wiki, not just Kynde' talk.
:::::''Moved from [[User_talk:Kynde#Updating_the_global_message_board]]'' [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:40, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
::::::Sorry, I was just trying to simultaneously defend both of our opinions and state the facts. Also, thank you to FaviFake for moving this conversation to the proposals. This seems to be happening with Kynde's talk page a lot recently. (that being twice, but I've never seen it happen before, soo...) --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 20:02, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:Hi, it's me. The "global message board" DSB was referencing to is the [[MediaWiki:Sitenotice|site notice]]. If Kynde could add it in the format that FaviFake said, that would be great! Also, I had thought that the server ''could'' be a fun place for us to bond/talk, but that can obviously be conducted in DMs. FaviFake's reasoning for having all conversations on-site makes perfect sense to me. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 20:35, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
::So THAT'S what it's called! I am one of today's lucky 10,000. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 23:35, 16 September 2025 (UTC)
:::I'm not sure if I'm wrong or not, but I think of the discord as 2 things:
*A backup form of communication
*An informal place to hang out with fellow readers and editors.

Again, please correct me if I'm wrong. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 15:23, 18 September 2025 (UTC)

==Dark theme?==
I saw a post about this in the archives that went unanswered, so I'll ask it here: Why doesn't the wiki have a dark theme? I feel it would be very useful for those who don't want to be blinded by editing. Wikipedia's got one, and it looks great! --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 15:27, 18 September 2025 (UTC)
:Dark mode IS a thing. You need to create a common.css page to use it though. Copy paste in this to get dark mode (make sure to hit "Show preview" to test it out before you save!):

<code><nowiki> /* NQH's totally cool and amazingly radical dark mode */
/* Licensed CC0-1.0, no rights reserved. */

/* Sets everything to dark background. */
body * {background-color: #111 !important; color: #DDD !important;}
div.mw-body, div.mw-body * {background-color: #222 !important;}

/* Vector */

.mw-wiki-logo {background-color: #00000000 !important; filter: invert(100%);}

/* Monobook */

div#column-one > div#p-cactions > div.pBody > ul > li > a {background-color: #222 !important;}

/* Modern */

div#mw_header, div#mw_header h1#firstHeading {background-color: #000 !important;}
div#mw_content {background-color: #222 !important;}

/* Cologne blue */

/* Diff. */
td.diff-context, td.diff-context * {color: #777 !important; border-color: #333 !important;}
td.diff-deletedline {border-color: #F33 !important;}
td.diff-addedline {border-color: #3F3 !important;}
del.diffchange-inline {color: #F55 !important;}
ins.diffchange-inline {color: #5F5 !important;}

/* Numbers in history view. */
span.mw-plusminus-pos {color: #5F5 !important;}
span.mw-plusminus-neg {color: #F55 !important;}
strong.mw-plusminus-pos {color: #0F0 !important; font-size: 1.2em;}
strong.mw-plusminus-pos {color: #0F0 !important; font-size: 1.2em;}

/* Links. */
a[href$="redlink=1"] {color: #F00 !important; text-decoration: line-through !important;}
a:not([href$="redlink=1"]) {color: #88F !important;}
a:visited:not([href$="redlink=1"]) {color: #AAF !important;}
a:hover:not([href$="redlink=1"]) {color: #AAF !important; text-decoration: underline !important; font-weight: bold !important;}
a:active:not([href$="redlink=1"]) {color: #FFF !important; text-decoration: underline !important; font-weight: bold !important;} </nowiki></code>

--'''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 19:01, 18 September 2025 (UTC)

::In response to DSB, in your userpage... The links being white... Which links? See the "/* Links. */" section. The various links are #F00 (red, the invalid ones), #88F (light blue), #AAF (lighter blue), or #FFF (white). If you don't like them, change them.
::The other things can probably be fixed if we know exactly what you're getting and what you actually expect. Also a good idea to check for typos/miscopying, via basic troubleshooting. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.246.204|82.132.246.204]] 22:43, 18 September 2025 (UTC)
:::I got edit-conflicted with... seemingly no change. Anyway, I found a better version which I now use. It's much cleaner and looks like it belongs. Only issue is that the sidebar templates have inverted colors? But very minor. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 01:24, 19 September 2025 (UTC)
:::CODE!!!<code><nowiki>/* WikimediaUI Dark Mode
*
* Wikimedia Design Team 2019-2021
* Original authors:
* - Volker E. – [[User:Volker_E._(WMF)]]
* - Alex Hollender
* - MusikAnimal
* - Carolyn Li-Madeo
* - Jdlrobson
*
* Original at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Volker_E._(WMF)/dark-mode.css
* Version for Gadget CSS skin override usage only.
* Basically removed of all interaction element styles and
* set to `html` instead of JS injected `.client-dark-mode` class.
*
* Last updated: 2021-04-20
*
*/

/** To prevent 'jumping' effect within #p-personal in Vector/Monobook. Overrides [[MediaWiki:Gadget-dark-mode-toggle-pagestyles.css]] **/
body.skin-vector-legacy :not(#pt-darkmode) + #pt-watchlist::before,
body.skin-monobook :not(#pt-darkmode) + #pt-watchlist::before {
content: "Light mode";
}

@media screen {

/* set height for monobook and timeless, because the filter in FF needs dimensions to get it to apply */
html {
height: 100%;
}

/* Filter needs to reside on `html`, see https://phabricator.wikimedia.org/T221425#5153917 */
html,
/* All other selectors have `filter` double-applied to turn back to “normal” by inheritance */
html img:not( .mw-invert ),
html video:not( .mw-invert ),
html ogvjs:not( .mw-invert ),
html svg:not( .mw-invert ),
html iframe:not( .mw-invert ),
html .mw-no-invert,
html .cdx-no-invert,
html td .diffchange,
html .wvui-typeahead-suggestion__thumbnail,
html .skin-minerva .mw-notification-visible .mw-notification-content,
html .oo-ui-searchWidget-results .oo-ui-iconElement-icon,
html .list-thumb,
/* Extensions */
html .media-viewer .image img,
html .media-viewer .mw-file-description img {
filter: invert( 1 ) hue-rotate( 180deg );
}

/* Reset overrides, needed where double application above isn't working. */
/* Vector modern */
html .skin-vector .mw-logo-wordmark,
html .skin-vector .mw-logo-tagline,
html .skin-timeless .mw-wiki-title > img,
html .wvui-icon svg,
html .mw-ext-score img,
html .skin-invert img,
html .skin-invert-image img,
html .mw-hiero-table img {
filter: none;
}

/* Backgrounds */
html table,
html table.ambox-content,
html table.toccolours,
html .mw-notification,
html .mwe-popups,
html .infobox,
html .toc,
html .thumbinner,
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Thumb'],
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Frame'],
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Thumb'] > figcaption,
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Frame'] > figcaption,
html .wikitable,
html .cbnnr-main,
html .cx-callout,
html .overlay.media-viewer,
html #simpleSearch,
html #simpleSearch #searchInput,
html #siteNotice #centralNotice .cnotice {
background-color: #ddd;
}

/* Borders */
html body,
html h1,
html h2,
html h3,
html h4,
html h5,
html h6,
html table.ambox-content,
html table.toccolours,
html .mw-notification,
html .infobox,
html .toc,
html .thumbinner,
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Thumb'],
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Frame'],
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Thumb'] > figcaption,
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Frame'] > figcaption,
html #mw-head,
html #mw-panel,
/* Vector 2022 uses a transparent border for margin collapsing
(T312822) so don't apply this rule there */
.skin-vector-legacy #content.mw-body,
html #simpleSearch,
html #simpleSearch #searchInput,
html #siteNotice #centralNotice .cnotice {
border-color: #cdcbc8;
}

/* Links */
/* Links: normal */
html a,
html .vector-menu-tabs li a,
/* Backwards compatible VectorTabs, deprecated in MW v1.35. */
html .vectorTabs li a,
html .toctogglelabel,
html .mw-parser-output a.external,
html .mw-parser-output a.extiw,
html .mw-parser-output a.extiw:active,
html #mw-panel .portal .body li a {
/* color: #69f; Proposal below for level AA conformance, see also https://phabricator.wikimedia.org/T233266
`#36c` is transformed by :root `filter` to be closer to chosen `#69f`. */
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}

/* Links: visited */
html a:visited,
html .mw-parser-output a.extiw:visited,
html #mw-panel .portal .body li a:visited {
/* color: #709bbd; Proposal below uses to-be-standardized color from https://phabricator.wikimedia.org/T213778 */
color: #6b4ba1;
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html a.new,
html .vector-menu-tabs li.new a,
html .vectorTabs li.new a {
color: #ff6e6e;
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/* Image thumbnails */
html .thumbimage,
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Thumb'] > :not(figcaption) .mw-file-element,
html figure[typeof~='mw:File/Frame'] > :not(figcaption) .mw-file-element {
border: 0;
}

/* Content image (thumbnail) SVGs */
/* `*not( .mbox-image )` exception doesn't work for unclear reasons */
html .image img[ src*='svg' ],
html .mw-file-description img[ src*='svg' ],
html img[ src*='Wiktionary-logo'] {
background-color: #fff;
border-radius: 1px;
}

/* Dealing with false positives from selector above */
html .mw-echo-ui-notificationItemWidget-icon img[ src*='svg' ],
html .mbox-image .image img[ src*='svg' ],
html .mbox-image .mw-file-description img[ src*='svg' ],
/* Emoji generated by [[Template:Emoji]] */
html .emoji .image img,
html .emoji .mw-file-description img,
/* Vote symbols on Talk pages */
html .image img[ alt^="Symbol" ],
html .mw-file-description img[ alt^="Symbol" ] {
background-color: transparent;
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html .mwe-popups {
box-shadow: 0 30px 90px -20px rgba( 0, 0, 0, 0.3 ), 0 0 1px #000;
}

html .mwe-popups.flipped-y:after,
html .mwe-popups.flipped-x-y:after {
border-top: 11px solid #ddd;
}

html .mwe-popups.mwe-popups-no-image-pointer:after {
border-bottom: 11px solid #ddd;
}

/* Contributions menu */
html .cx-callout-1:after {
border-bottom-color: #ddd;
}

/* Mobile Wikipedia logo mobile header */
html .branding-box img {
filter: brightness( 0 );
}

}

@-moz-document url-prefix() {
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background: #000;
}
}

@-moz-document url-prefix() {
@supports (overflow-clip-margin: 1px) {
body {
background: #fff;
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}
</nowiki></code>
--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 13:27, 19 September 2025 (UTC)

==Page Creation site notice for new accounts==
Many, many, '''''many''''' new people come around and ask other users about how to create their own user pages. Personally, I think we could stop the confusion by coding a different type of 'you do not have permission to create this page' error for new accounts, which would look something like this:

'To create new pages, your account must be at least a week old and have 50 edits. You can search for this page title in other pages, or search the related logs, but you do not have permission to create this page.'

Just a thought, in case admins can do that without Jeff's involvement. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 20:02, 30 September 2025 (UTC)

: I'd {{template|Actual citation needed}} on the "many"s, unless you're aware of off-site discussions about this one. It's actually pretty infrequent, so I feel you must be counting over several years, having found a number of historic examples dotted around on pages such as this. That said, it ''is'' currently as much an FAQ as anything else ([[explain xkcd:Editor FAQ#Why can't I create my user page and upload images?|as actually mentioned there]], for anyone who bothers to read it). And we do sometimes get a new-users, the ones freshly post-validated to create pages merrily 'helping out' all those they think need their help in that regard.
: Can I suggest that we do not have the exact number of edits so prominantly, though. Within the last day, as a matter of fact, we seem to have had someone making many useless edits (mostly of the form of adding extra spaces into seemingly random places within seemingly random articles), possibly in order to have created a new page of their own. And that's ''really'' not to the spirit of things. Inviting, or at least suggestively hinting, the possibility of near-vandalism (hopefully not ''actual'' vandalism) for the impatient who just see it as a 'target' to try to reach. And the truly and genuinely eager to contribute can easily have clocked up that number of edits to existing pages ''with no edit-tallying motive'' by the time the mandatory week has also expired.
: The caveat, I know, is that saying "a week and ''a certain number of edits''", aluded to but unspecified, will have the some of the same uselessly-editing people chasing an arbitrarily high edit-tally in order to be 'ready' for the week finishing. But that kind of person is already of the wrong initial mindset. And people desperate to create new pages with perhaps little more than a week of having, in ''most other respects'', full editing rights (which is only marginally more than IPs like me have, as there only a few key places that I am prevented from editing) tend to find themselves likely to be contributing to the Category: Pages to Delete list (perhaps courtesy of more established editors).
: On balance, perhaps the page you mention should instead briefly contain a link to the existing FAQ section, via link text explaining that there ''are'' reasons, but "see here" for details, or similar non-specific wording. Anyone who hasn't read the FAQ could benefit from being aware that it exists. And if anything ever changes (rise or fall of the time or tally limits, even removal or addition of specific criteria), the FAQ will probably be sooner updated with the new details before anyone thinks to edit the 'error page' again (a particular page that long-established users will have rarely, if ever, seen). Assuming, of course, even that anyone can edit that level of page content right now. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.184.204|82.132.184.204]] 23:08, 30 September 2025 (UTC)
::I don’t have time to read ip's comment but i definitely think the number shouldn't be so public, and i don’t see a need. i would support a small editnoce for letting users know they have to vaguely contribute more. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:17, 1 October 2025 (UTC)

== Some suggestions surrounding the use of the {{template|unsigned}} and {{template|unsigned ip}} templates. ==

;Where I just reference the {{template|unsigned}} template, there should also be an obvious extension of the same principle to the {{template|unsigned ip}} one as well.)

These are some interelated proposals, that could be implemented singly/incrementally (as desired and agreed upon). But might deserve doing in 'one go', at least the agreed upon elements. I'm just putting each bit into different subsections for isolated discussion (or ignoring) of the specific merits/otherwise of each. [[Special:Contributions/2.98.65.8|2.98.65.8]] 21:33, 20 October 2025 (UTC)
;TD;DR;s added, if you don't like the author's original verbosity. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.30|82.132.244.30]] 19:07, 12 November 2025 (UTC)

===Aesthetic/semantic change===
Issue: Not often, but sometimes, comments that are 'unsigned'-tagged (with the words "please sign your comments with <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>") invokes retrospective use of <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki> by those who take the words at face value. This ''can'' result in a (previously) 'unsigned' message having a later timestamp than its replies, or later 'top level' messages more immediately signed by their editors.

The more 'proper' way to replace an {{template|unsigned}} tag, for those that want to, would be to copy-paste a valid signature of the same type and replace the username(/IP) and datestamp as already (usually!) given in that initial pester-tag. But this is by no means made obvious in the above message.

Proposal: Wording to be changed to something like "in future, please sign your comments with <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>", or "this comment should have been signed with <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>". Or other wording, to be agreed upon, to make as snappy as the original ("was not signed with <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>"). The aim is to omit the implicit request to anachrnistically sign, however.

Overall effect: Any change to the template(s) will transclude to what would probably be an overwhelming majority of Talk pages (at a guess), plus other 'discussion' pages like these Portal ones. But there's no change in functionality or any individual page-updating, just the slightly different text when viewing in future.
*Note1: the {{template|unsigned}} template already takes a (rarely used) third parameter, which overwrites the "please sign..." message (i.e. <code><nowiki>{{unsigned|<username>|<timestamp>|<alternate message>}}</nowiki></code>, and it'd still be overwritten exactly the same wherever that has been applied.
*Note2: it also would not rewrite the text given of any originally "subst:"ed version of the template, but that's a completely different issue.

Justification: The need may be slight, but it's also a trivial tweak to implement (or even to trial) with a marginal but maybe useful long-term gain. But we'll need a proper discussion of what wording to move to, or else that it's not necessary. [[Special:Contributions/2.98.65.8|2.98.65.8]] 21:33, 20 October 2025 (UTC)

: Case in point {{diff|389535|the few edits that led up to here}}. Didn't really 'spoil' any actual chronology but shows how easily it is obeyed wrongly. [[Special:Contributions/2.98.65.8|2.98.65.8]] 18:04, 24 October 2025 (UTC)

;TL;DR;:Change the text from "please sign your comments with <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>", slightly. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.30|82.132.244.30]] 19:07, 12 November 2025 (UTC)

===Additional templates to complement 'unsigned' ones===
Issue: Retrospective 'honest faking' of previously missing signatures is mildly awkward, as mentioned above. It's easy to get wrong, even easier to just not bother at all with it. (Either leave 'unsigned' or create the issue from the prior item.

Proposal: Complement the template usage <nowiki>{{</nowiki>''un''<nowiki>signed|<username>|<timestamp>}}</nowiki> with one that is <nowiki>{{</nowiki>''retro''<nowiki>signed|<username>|<timestamp>}}</nowiki>. Take the same parameters (except the 'alternate pester text') but return just the effective <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki>-style format, now no longer with the 'please sign...'-type appended message.

There are a number of possible uses for this:

#''user1'' forgets to sign; ''user2'' spots this, invokes {{template|unsigned}} to it; ''user1'' '''acknowledges''' their goof, by simply changing the template-invocation of "unsigned" to "retrosigned" and the rendered page is left neater (any "whoops, my bad!" apologies can be given in the edit-comments, as unused third-parameter, etc, if they wish),
#''user1'' forgets to sign; ''user1'', themself, spots this (before anyone else) and applies this as easily as they would apply a {{template|unsigned}}. Slightly easier than 'honest faking' that involves the valid copypaste-method (again, with "whoops!, my bad!" opportunities, should they feel like it),
#''user1'' forgets to sign; ''user2'' spots this; knows that it's an oversight by a regular contributor who just slipped up, and there's no reason to make it a 'pester message'; so ''user2'' just goes straight to using Template:retrosigned, and doesn't bother with the 'pestering' or 'blaming' implications inherent in Template:unsigned),
#''user1'' forgot to sign ''...a decade ago or more!''; We know that (for example) User:Jeff is unlikely to benefit from being reminded/pestered/shamed, so it just seems better to let the more recent editor 'retrosign' any such example that gets discovered,
#or possibly, '''with care, ''and honesty'':''' someone, as ''newusername'', wishes to associate themselves with comments made by ''oldusername'', or even any given ''ip-address'' contrinution they previously used; that's something I wouldn't do myself, but I could see the appeal.
*Note1: my method (and that of others?) to edit in an 'unsigned'-tag is to copy the header info from the appropriate diff page's column, paste that text (containing datestamp and ID of contributor, together with some other textual cruft) as unsigned-tag parameters, rearrange edit ("timestamp" then "userid", with a few extra characters, becomes "|userid|timestamp" parameters), the same method would entirely work with the retrosigned version too.
**This, however, does not contain the "(UTC)" timezone info that <nowiki>~~~~</nowiki> would give by default, so a similarly direct retroactive 'fake' will also lack this. Eagle-eyed readers might pick up on this. Which isn't an issue that concerns me. (One could always manually append " (UTC)" to the second-param, or after the template itself, even if I don't think it worth the bother.)
*Note2: It doesn't reproduce the appearance of anyone's custom signature, if they had one that should have been invoked. But also a trivial differemce, having resolved the whole issue of "no longer being unsigned".
**Should anyone ''really'' care to reproduce a custom/non-standard signature, they can still do so (on their behalf or someone else's). This is just the quick and easy

Justification: The idea is to allow for the 'tidying up' of the front-facing pages with less convoluted and more honest back-end edits. I don't expect, or want, anyone to retrospectively convert historic 'unsigned' tags just for the sake of it, but it adds a tool to the kit of anyone who is already prepared to 'correct' these things (their own, or others) in any given page-source.

I'd potentially use it for long-standing editor's lapses (the "Template:retrosigned" version), to feel less guilty about apparently nagging them about it. Or upon myself (the "Template:retrosigned ip" version), if I slipped up, to feel less guilty for going back in and 'honestly faking' what I had forgotten to sign, but (as noted above) there are several other applicable uses. [[Special:Contributions/2.98.65.8|2.98.65.8]] 21:33, 20 October 2025 (UTC)

;TL;DR;:Let there be "retrosigned" and "retrosigned ip" to be used where {{template|unsigned}} and {{template|unsigned ip}} are not (any longer) what is needed somewhere. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.30|82.132.244.30]] 19:07, 12 November 2025 (UTC)

===Tracking parameter underutilisation===
Issue: Early implementation, and sometimes more recent, of the {{template|unsigned}} template may use its most basic <code><nowiki>{{unsigned}}</nowiki></code> form with ''no parameters given''. This gives an 'error', of sorts, due to having no official check-and-fallback upon not being given the username parameter. The error is visual only, and ''may'' have been allowed/forced to happen as a way to force its correction (though, at least until recently, it sees not to have done this as much as it should have).

Other times, perhaps immediately after the first parameter (contributor name) started to be routinely added, <code><nowiki>{{unsigned|username}}</nowiki></code> is used ''without the timestamp parameter'' that we now mostly take for granted.

(While the current third parameter, the 'alternate "pease..." text' is entirely an optional and a mostly unused feature, future changes may require/encourage further elements (perhaps 'named parameters') and leave our default "unsigned|username|timestamp" format lacking.)

I've been known to update any discovered 'bare bones'-unsigned formats, if I find any in pages I edit. Someone else seems to have adopted it as a task of its own, recently. This relies upon spotting the non-standard (or at least non-modern) usages.

Additionally, there ''is'' the in getting the rather ugly <code> <small> -- [[User:{{{1}}}|{{{1}}}]] ([[User talk:{{{1}}}|talk]]) <span style="color:grey; white-space:nowrap;">''(please sign your comments with <nowiki>~~</nowiki>~~)''</span></small></code> 'error' for all no-param versions that exist.

Proposal: Firstly, just implement the 'catch' code upon the (lack of) first parameter. Make it 'fail cleanly', or at least less 'errorlike'. This is trivial to implement (i.e. <code><nowiki>{{{1|}}}</nowiki></code> instead of <code><nowiki>{{{1}}}</nowiki></code>). (I'd do that right now, if I could.)

Secondly, within the 'failover' half of the 'non-parameter' parsing, give it a Category: membership.

I have several possible suggestions for the style of Category membership:
# If the 'userID' isn't given, perhaps "Category:Unsigned no-UserID", if the 'timestamp' isn't given, "Category:Unsigned no-timestamp", and any others.
#* Note: the system could be extended to other templates, such as "Category:Incomplete no-reason" or perhaps "Category:Comic no-image", but that's not officially part of this suggestion.
# More simply, just have "Category:Unsigned-error", without specifying. (Or even "Category:Template-error" for far more generalised use.)
# Differently specific, use the category re-indexing (something like <code><nowiki>[[Category:Template-error|blah]]</nowiki></code>) for handy grouping-with-differentiation

Obviously, the appropriate category-page needs to be there to show any (and all) invocations. Similar to the [[:Category:Incomplete explanations]] one, etc, it would invite action to ''remove'' membership as examples are sorted.

Justification: This is a solution for 'meta-problems', really. Which 'category membership' option is used would define how much additional editing(/correcting) this might prompt for historic problems, as well as identifying improperly added new template-invocations. But it might be good to know exactly how wide or narrow a scope people might wish to apply to this, before going ahead and creating many new 'error' categories... one even just the single catch-all one. [[Special:Contributions/2.98.65.8|2.98.65.8]] 21:33, 20 October 2025 (UTC)
;TL;DR;:Make it easier to find 'incompletely implemented' templates (initially the Unsigned ones), so they can be fixed by anyone who would like to. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.30|82.132.244.30]] 19:07, 12 November 2025 (UTC)
----
This looks AI-generated. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:36, 12 November 2025 (UTC)
:Really? Unless AIs are doing 'accidentally on purpose' typos, I think it just looks like someone with more ideas trying to burst out onto the page than they can easily (and accurately) summarise. And I'm also that type of person, so I can ''easily'' relate. There, but for the grace of <s>God</s> any-unspecific-generalised-universal-force-of-non-deterministic-fate goes I! [[Special:Contributions/82.132.245.237|82.132.245.237]] 18:50, 12 November 2025 (UTC)
:Added a "''Too Long; Didn't Read;''" summary to each, as I understand the intents. ;) Now I'm wondering if there are any other things I might do that for! [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.30|82.132.244.30]] 19:07, 12 November 2025 (UTC)

==Banning the phrase "WhatsApp"==
I've noticed that lately, much of our vandalism has come out of scamvertisements asking you to contact the scammers on WhatsApp. As I don't believe Randall has ever actually used WhatsApp, and as such it is unneeded, I feel we should just prevent any edits containing the word 'WhatsApp' from going through if the edit removes more than 90% of the page's byte count (let's be honest, nobody is going to delete that much from a page). --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 17:37, 29 October 2025 (UTC)
:The standard protection is to have [[user:theusaf]] to refine/expand what theusafBOT reacts to. Which it seems they occasionally do.
:I don't know whether they're paying attention, but I'd hope they'd pick up on such things. Given that it's the Feedback/etc comics that regularly get spammed like this, I'd hope they'd at least try to see what someone else reverted in leiu, and adapt accordingly, when they get the time.
:I don't know the various sets of exact criteria in use (some seem generally obvious enough, key patterns and keywords involved) and I think something to at least start with "blanked page and replaced with ...", on specific sets of pages, as an edit comment could be a good predictor with minimal false-positives. But I wouldn't want to explicitly suggest that (or your idea), lest the more attentive spammers made a trivial change to their future edit plans to by-pass it.
:...though I frankly think those responsible in this case don't care/think ''too'' much about it, it's more for all the other things I'd rather leave trivially unguessable how to get round. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.244.138|82.132.244.138]] 18:30, 29 October 2025 (UTC)
::I'll look into this. —[[User:Theusaf|theusaf]] ([[User talk:Theusaf|talk]]) 22:34, 6 November 2025 (UTC)
:::Hey look, an admin that isn't Kynde! That's... actually the first time I've seen an admin that isn't Kynde in person. Cool! <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#E3C6BE">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#CC9A8B">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 17:15, 7 November 2025 (UTC)
::::Yeah, I'm not super active in the discussions, but I occasionally edit and check that by bot is still working and not destroying anything. The whatsapp check has been added. —[[User:Theusaf|theusaf]] ([[User talk:Theusaf|talk]]) 05:00, 13 November 2025 (UTC)
:::::*SKIBIDI-POP PA-DOOP TA-DA TAAAA!!!!* <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#E3C6BE">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#CC9A8B">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 14:48, 13 November 2025 (UTC)

==Adblock popup==
This wiki uses ads as a way to make money and keep the website up, and many people use adblockers (the absolute state of YT ads is insane). So, why don't we add one of those AdBlock popups that they have on some sites? Maybe the message could be:

{{Header text|So, about that AdBlock...<br>

explain xkcd uses ads to keep our server online. Please consider turning off your AdBlock so we can continue providing quality explanations. Thanks!}}

This would be an optional thing and easily closable, but it could provide at least a bit of extra revenue. Maybe we could also make a 'thank you' screen for people who do actually turn off their adblocker (it would only pop up once, after they turn off the AdBlock):

{{Header text|Thank you for turning off your adblocker!

Sincerely, the explain xkcd community.}}

What do you guys think? --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#000080">converse</span>]]</sup> 15:58, 30 October 2025 (UTC)

Adblockers often also can block anti-adblock popups, but sure, go ahead. I guess you could also ask for donations to run the site. Same caveat applies. - an adblock user. [[User:None|None]] ([[User talk:None|talk]]) 20:47, 14 December 2025 (UTC)

== categories template ==

Hear me out: I've been doing a lot of category adding to mostly files that are uncategorized (BTW, we have a 11,000-12,000 backlog of pages-any help (or maybe a bot!) would be greatly appreciated). I think that we should make a template called Category or "cat" so that we can add categories faster. Of course, HotCat exists, but it only renders when there are already existing categories. For all the uncategorized files/pages, we would have to manually add it in. My strategy currently is moving my mouse to the edit button, clicking it, hit return to make a whitespace (for organization), hitting CTRL-V, moving my mouse to the "Save changes" button, and clicking it. And that's only for the really repetitive ones, like the comic images or Hoverboard or Time. Does anybody have any thoughts/objections to this? Of course, we would still need to edit, but it would be a lot easier than typing out <nowiki>[[Category:___]]</nowiki> IMHO. Additionally, I've studied up a bit of template code (Lua) and I've sort of fleshed out some code. I don't really know if it works, but if there's anybody more experienced feel free to look through it! I've included Pages to delete (ptd) and Helper comic images (hci) as examples. <br>

<code><nowiki>
{{#ifeq:{{{1}}}|ptd|
[[Category:Pages to delete]]
}}

{{#ifeq:{{{1}}}|hci|
{{#if:{{{2|}}}
| [[Category:Helper comic images ({{{2}}})]]
| [[Category:Helper comic images]]
}}
}}
</nowiki></code>

Thanks, --'''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#3a795e">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#ce5f15">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 10:17, 3 December 2025 (UTC)
:That's actually a good idea! So, it would be: <code><nowiki>{{cat|Helper comic images (1190)}}</nowiki></code>? That would be quite convenient. <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#FF0000">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#00873E">Converse</span>]]</sup></span> 20:53, 4 December 2025 (UTC)
::As written, I read it as...
::If "ptd" in the first spot, i.e. <code><nowiki>{{cat|ptd}}</nowiki></code>, that would give the Pages To Delete category.
::If "hci" in the first spot, i.e. <code><nowiki>{{cat|hci}}</nowiki></code>, then it would instead Helper Comic Images
::If "hci" in the first spot and a number in the second, i.e. <code><nowiki>{{cat|hci|1234}}</nowiki></code>, then it would instead give you Helper Comic Images (1234).
::There are maybe a few minor issues with it, as written. I'd use <code><nowiki>{{{1|}}}</nowiki></code>, for starters, and nest it so that any non-specified (including blank) param would give out an obvious mis-use error result. And you'd probably end up having <code><nowiki>{{cat|<whatever>}}</nowiki></code> sitting in your paste buffer (or would <code><nowiki>{{subst:cat|<whatever>}}</nowiki></code> be better?) exactly the same as you'd have had the basic Category, anyway.
::But I really wouldn't know where it sits in the [[1205: Is It Worth the Time?]] scale... Almost a "death by supernova neutrinos" issue, I suspect... ;) [[Special:Contributions/78.144.255.82|78.144.255.82]] 21:37, 4 December 2025 (UTC)
: I would use a switch instead of an if, like
:<code><nowiki><includeonly>[[Category:{{subst:#switch:{{{1}}}
| ptd = Pages to delete
| hci = Helper comic images {{subst:#if: {{{2|}}} | ({{{2}}}) }}
| {{{1|}}}
}}]]</includeonly></nowiki></code>
: It should be used with <nowiki>{{subst:</nowiki> because otherwise the category won't be able to be removed normally, but it technically works without it. The substs before the ifs make the resulting wikitext nicer, as otherwise when the overall template is used with <nowiki>{{subst:</nowiki>, it inserts the if statements directly. Consequently, it must be enclosed in includeonly's to prevent the substitution from occurring when the template is saved. It will also default to inserting the category with the name of the first argument, but it is longer to type using the template like this (<nowiki>{{subst:cat|All comics}}</nowiki>) than just typing the category directly (<nowiki>[[Category:All comics]]</nowiki>).
:If having an obvious error message is desired, you could replace the default case (the <code><nowiki>{{{1|}}}</nowiki></code>) with something like <code><nowiki>]] Invalid argument for [[Template:cat</nowiki></code>. [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 05:02, 16 December 2025 (UTC)
All fo this sounds good! I don't have the time to look into this but Firestar233 is incredible with templates so i trust their code will work! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:41, 17 December 2025 (UTC)

== New Character Proposal for Kid Cueballs ==

I'm somewhat new to editing, though I've been using this wiki for some time now. And I've noticed that with comics such as 3178, whenever a kid is represented by Cueball the transcript says "a Cueball like kid" which is long and slightly annoying to read. So I propose giving the kid a name that's shorter and easier to use but still let's the reader know that a kid is being represented by Cueball: Kidball.

Thoughts? -- [[User:MikeTheNewGuy|MikeTheNewGuy]] ([[User talk:MikeTheNewGuy|talk]]) 13:25, 17 January 2026‎ (UTC)
: Hi, Mike; welcome to ExplainXKCD. BTW, I added your signature to your comment.
: But, on-topic: this sounds like an interesting idea. But, in your mind, is this "Kidball" always the same kid, rather than a type of kid? Would you expect that if you see "Kidball" in a new comic he'll behave the same way? If not, then I wouldn't add this name. -- [[User:Dtgriscom|Dtgriscom]] ([[User talk:Dtgriscom|talk]]) 13:32, 17 January 2026 (UTC)
::Thanks for adding my signature, I’m gonna have to remember to do that.
::What I had in mind with Kidball was that most of the time he’s the same kid (since most of the time he only appears in Miss Lenhart’s class, at least that’s where he’s been the majority of the times I’ve seen him), but is occasionally used to represent someone else; in the same way that Cueball appears to be the same person most of the time, but Randall occasionally uses him to represent someone else. And using “Kidball” in the explanations/transcripts might be more efficient than “a Cueball like kid”.
::And yes, if I saw him in a new comic, I would expect him to more or less behave the same way, unless it’s clear that he’s representing someone else.[[User:MikeTheNewGuy|MikeTheNewGuy]] ([[User talk:MikeTheNewGuy|talk]]) 18:04, 17 January 2026 (UTC)
::I'm not sure; let's see what others think. -- [[User:Dtgriscom|Dtgriscom]] ([[User talk:Dtgriscom|talk]]) 18:11, 17 January 2026 (UTC)
:::I do think that he can and should be named, as he's very similar to [[Jill]], even if she has more personality than him. And Kidball is an amazing name! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:01, 23 January 2026 (UTC)
::::I concur. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 21:57, 23 January 2026 (UTC)
:::::Me too. I'm not trusting myself with the actual page creation, so somebody else will need to create it. (sorry, just don't want to mess things up) <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: 16px;">--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]][[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<sup><span style="color:#000080">Converse</span></sup>]]'''''</span> 22:51, 28 January 2026 (UTC)
::::I've made them. See [[Kidball]] and [[:Category:Comics featuring Kidball]]. I've also changed the header of this thread for more clarity. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 01:40, 1 February 2026 (UTC)
:::::Thanks! Anyone up for populating it? [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:14, 1 February 2026 (UTC)
::::::I'll try to see if I can find the time (and motivation) to do so this week. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 03:07, 2 February 2026 (UTC)
::::::I just went through [[:Category:Comics featuring children]] and added about 9 to [[:Category:Comics featuring Kidball]]. We're getting there! [[User:Maxcodes|Maxcodes]] ([[User talk:Maxcodes|talk]]) 14:34, 15 February 2026 (UTC)
:::Should comics with multiple Kidballs be placed in [[:Category:Multiple Cueballs]], or should a new category be created? [[User:Maxcodes|Maxcodes]] ([[User talk:Maxcodes|talk]]) 12:37, 15 February 2026 (UTC)
:::: (First, I made it markup as a "visible category link", as you intended, rather than the invisible category membership that normally happens, hope you don't mind.)
:::: A further question is if a comic was Multiple Cueballs, by dint of having a Cueball ''and'' a now-IDed-as-Kidball, is it still Multiple Cueballs? [[Special:Contributions/82.132.239.239|82.132.239.239]] 13:26, 15 February 2026 (UTC)

:::: We've only just got to the point where we're naming this character Kidball; I'd say don't complicate the situation just yet. Too many categories makes the categories less useful. -- [[User:Dtgriscom|Dtgriscom]] ([[User talk:Dtgriscom|talk]]) 13:52, 15 February 2026 (UTC)
:::: Children are rarely alone, normally being with other children and/or with one or one-or-more adults. So [[:Category:Comics featuring children]] covers Multiple Kidballs.
:::: I'd say that Multiple Cueballs is a notable 'common strangeness' that I think it's useful to continue note, for various reasons, but multiple non-Cueball characters (e.g. how [[1000]] has it, in-extremis) aren't worth all the various different character-specific 'multiple' categories. (And, yes, an adult Cueball and a Kidball should not be "Multiple Cueballs".) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 18:29, 15 February 2026 (UTC)
:::::Agreed. Multiple Cueballs is usually for unusual cases where there isn't a different main character other than cueball. A bald kid and a bald adult are two different people. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:52, 16 February 2026 (UTC)
== Bring back mboxes! ==

[https://mediawiki.org/wiki/Template:Mbox Mboxes] (do read that link) are message boxes that prompt editors to edit.
They say things such as, "'''Please help expand this page.'''"
However, they aren't on this wiki!

So, there are a few different templates resembling mboxes:
* {{template|notice}},
* {{template|notice2}},
* {{template|incomplete}}, and
* {{template|incomplete transcript}}
are just a few I've seen.

I just don't think this is the way! Also, I checked {{template|ambox}} and it said it was deleted. However, the proposal archive
isn't working and I can't check the reason. So I can't see why we aren't using them!

Here are a few arguments for mboxes:
* Mboxes can be different types, such as a notice or an alert, or even an incomplete notice, with a <code>type</code> attribute.
* Mboxes are <abbr title="Don't Repeat Yourself">DRY</abbr>, they're reusable.
* Mboxes are used on Wikipedia, and other sites I'm sure, so using them here will make it more comfortable for new editors coming from other sites such as Wikipedia.
* Using mboxes will make styling all alerts easier. (OK YES I ADMIT IT I WANT MY USER STYLES)

So why aren't we using them? I'm thinking that if this topic gets enough support, we can bring mboxes back, and
start transitioning old alerts to mbox variants.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. [[User:Maxcodes|Maxcodes]] ([[User talk:Maxcodes|talk]]) 14:38, 16 February 2026 (UTC)
:The discussion, as you said, is in the archive: [[explain_xkcd_talk:Community_portal/Proposals#Notice_templates]]. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:58, 16 February 2026 (UTC)

== Transcripts ==

ATTENTION!

THIS:

Blah blah '''BLAH'''
''BLAH blah blah''
Wordssss…………

(Fill in blahs with your own words! Choose your own adventure fun!)

Is not a transcript!

I’ve had the impression that transcripts were for blind people (well, not ''just'' blind people) and making transcripts like the one above is only making things harder for people who may read aloud for blind people. Use things like [bold text] or [italics] or [comic in red text].

Idk wh6 I wrote this it just been bothering me. {{unsigned ip|2600:4040:52f7:9a00:cdb5:8d4d:4a6c:9917|16:58, 24 February 2026 (UTC)}}
:I've always wondered who the transcripts are even for. Since both the comics and the transcripts are in the same medium, those who are blind wouldn't be able to see the transcript. I guess they could have it read to them, but it's still confusing. As far as I know, it's just a thing that very early editors used to do, and the tradition stuck. What's the reasoning behind the transcripts? --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#3c2004">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#1E0F00">Converse</span>]]</sup> (BLM)''''' 14:22, 2 March 2026 (UTC)
::There exists the {{w|screen reader}}, which (at least until you start to trust AI, and there ''are'' undoubtely some good AI ATs out there that do this, these days, but are trained more to help with RL situations, like "what items are on the shop shelf I'm currently standing in front of?", not stick-figures and line-art...) can't do anything useful with the non-meta contents of an image but will happily speak out a transcript.
::It probably also helps, even if you don't need it spoken out for you, if you have a hankering of searching for a particular comic and you know some written words in it that might not ''necessarily'' be quoted verbatim in the Explanation. The text being all there in the Transcript section means you can get this site (or perhaps your caching search-engine of choice) to find it, without even relying on someone having decided to quote it directly elsewhere (which is often not good and/or necessary for an Explanation/Discussion/Trivia section contribution).
::If you're ''really'' lucky, you can even search for [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?search=%22office+chair%22&title=Special%3ASearch&go=Go some random visual thing], as long as it's been mentioned, without relying upon it havng already had a thoroughly populated Category... That relies upon any useful example having the same exact wording in the Transcript (and/or Explanation), but it's better than if you don't have any Transcripts at all.
::There are other useful things, a bit less obvious. Yet perhaps you could argue the presence of the Transcript may not actually be that vital... I don't know if anyone here ''does'' even use a screen-reader (but is still interested in webcomics ...a very visual medium). And there are probably other ways to get the other other advantages of the Transcript. Perhaps we could just make sure ''everything'' currently Transcripted is added to the Explanation (though that seems wasteful, and might make the Explanation far ''less'' useful/readable, having to fight past the obligatory in-depth explanation of whether Cueball's arm is raised in a particular panel or not...). But currently the Transcript exists, for those that need (or like) it, and also anybody who doesn't can just ignore it.
::And unless you're going to fold ''all'' Transcripts into the rest of the Explanation, it seems rather strange to just stop creating them. Honestly, it's probably half the fun for some people. And even another 'First!'-brag for users to bag, without being actually so crass as to edit anything just to say "First!" ;) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 19:58, 2 March 2026 (UTC)
:::I still do think that the people who need a screen reader would be interested in webcomics, although there probably exists a small population of people who are. Also, screen readers do not necessarily need to use AI in anything except for the voice. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#09ff00">Converse</span>]]</sup> 20:09, 2 March 2026 (UTC)
::::Not sure if you're agreeing with me or not there. You may have missed a "not" or something in there somewhere. And screen-readers don't need ''any'' AI (as we would currently expect it), although doubtless the last few years development of LLM/GenerativeAIs has probably improved them from 'dumb phonology' (with quirks that users would have to get use to) to actually saying things more eloquently and even correctly voice non-homophonic homographs correctly...
::::But, anyway, there's the other reasons for a Transcript, even if I don't know if anyone does bother to use SRs. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 20:45, 2 March 2026 (UTC)
:::::I did, indeed, accidentally miss a 'not'. I DON'T think that those who need screen readers would be interested in webcomics. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#09ff00">Converse</span>]]</sup> 20:55, 2 March 2026 (UTC)
::::::You'd be surprised. Just take a look at this discussion: https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Miscellaneous#Sightless_readers_offended_by_the_.22It.27s_.27cause_you.27re_dumb.22_tagline. [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 13:00, 9 April 2026 (UTC)
:::::::...I stand corrected. Also, [[2134: Too Much Talking|I have an opinion]] about that discussion after reading it. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#09ff00">Converse</span>]]</sup> 13:57, 9 April 2026 (UTC)

==New search algorithm?==
I was searching for a specific comic based on some words from the transcript. I was looking for [[2134: Too Much Talking]] and was searching "new opinions". INSTEAD of getting only results which had the phrase "new opinions", I got every comic which had the word 'new' or 'opinion' ANYWHERE in its explanation or transcript. I got over 100 hits and had to go through each preview individually, which was quite annoying and took far too long. I think there should be a function or option that you could turn on which makes it so, when you search "new opinions", it only displays pages with the search term and doesn't display anything which only contains a part of it. This happens every time I try to search. --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User Talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="color:#09ff00">Converse</span>]]</sup> 14:04, 9 April 2026 (UTC)
:You probably searched for (quote)<code>new opinions</code>(unquote), but you'll find that you'll get exactly what you wanted from (quote)<code>"new opinions"</code>(unquote) ''with'' the literal quotes.
:Like I did, by ending up on the page https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?search=%22new+opinions%22&title=Special%3ASearch&go=Go just now.
:Note that searches just for (quote)<code>new</code>(unquote) ''or'' just for (quote)<code>opinions</code>(unquote) return many (thousands!) of matches. (quote)<code>new opinions</code>(unquote) 'only' seems to return 42 examples (now including this page?). This would include examples of "opinion new" ordering or even totally separate uses like if any a phrase like "...relying upon old opinions, rather than new facts..." was used. An ''actual'' example, is the following search-result snippet:
::..., with no real bearing on most peoples' lives, a lot of people have strong '''opinions''' on the topic. One on side, people argue that planets should have a consiste ...with such debates, to the point of damaging their relationship, is nothing '''new''' for this couple.
:I don't know how we'd even update/change the search-algorithm.
:And, note, it'd annoy those who are already used to what subtle ways there are to be either more or less finicky in a desired search. Searching for mention of "dog leads"? The (unquoted) search for "dog lead" might be better to find "he has a dog on a lead" without (normally) getting pages that say something like "a heavy element, like lead". A quoted-search, or an assumption that the user would have wanted a quoted-search, would miss the first example.
:There may be various other tricks and tips to search-formatting. The use of "+" before a particular term used to (on Google) force that as a required match, when it might have included "does not include..." on a page that contains every other word, just not that one. But this site doesn't seem to have the full (traditional) Google-Fu behaviour, that also included things like (quote)<code>-dog lead</code>(unquote) that could get you (mostly) the metal or connecting cable references to lead without so.much of the additional pet-restraint homonym, but then the Google algorithm has also changed so much over the years (Natural Language Processing and even more AI-based methods, rather than a more obvious codified 'markup' to one's search terms where it was the user's initial knowledge that more limited the search, intentinally or otherwise). [[Special:Contributions/82.132.238.115|82.132.238.115]] 16:53, 9 April 2026 (UTC)

== Excessive verbosity ==

Should we have a category and community portal link to it for explanations which are considered excessively verbose to the point of deteriorating their usefulness to the readers? [[Special:Contributions/2603:800C:1200:596A:A08E:FCB1:F968:D433|2603:800C:1200:596A:A08E:FCB1:F968:D433]] 20:18, 15 April 2026 (UTC)
:Define excessive. (Also: Define insufficient.) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 21:09, 15 April 2026 (UTC)
::He never even said "insufficient". He said that making a whole essay as a response (I'll link some examples below) is a waste of time because all the text is overwhelming and it becomes harder to pick out the important parts. By the way, he may be referring to you, as you tend to make very long responses (read: not necessarily a bad thing).<br>
::Some examples:
::*[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:3231:_Lightning&curid=30046&diff=410387&oldid=410386 this edit by 81.179.199.253]
::*[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:3232:_Countdown_Standard&curid=30051&diff=410328&oldid=410327 this edit by 81.179.199.253]
::*[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Talk:3231:_Lightning&curid=30046&diff=410157&oldid=410141 this edit by 82.132.238.12]
::--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="font-family:Times; color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="font-family:Times; color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 21:18, 15 April 2026 (UTC)
:::Indeed. "Insufficient" was was seaid by me (IPv4), not IPv6. The point being that I'm not sure what amount of paring down would satisfy them, and what amount would be problematic to them.
:::If some information is there but looks superfluous to someone, they might remove it. If the information is not there but seems necessary, some other person might add it. And everyone has different ideas.
:::And in the two editing examples (and the example that wasn't me), they aren't even Explanation additions, which I'm sure (but will happily be corrected on) wasn't what the suggestion was about. Also, I make no apologies for being verbose enough to encopass a complicated issue, when I think it merits it, especially in Talk. There's also occasion to cut down/rationalise things (in Explanations), especially when multiple editors have added a concept here, an example there, a caveat at the end, etc, which might be best rewritten from scratch.
:::Face it, we who seek to "explain xkcd" have many things to say, whether we we're Nerd Sniped or just happen to think of something interesting but unmentioned. And those who wish xkcd to be explained may have many questions (even if they {{diff|410158|don't say what they are}}. Perhaps I personally err more on maintaining a verbosity (that can be skipped over by the impatient reader) rather than risk being too laconic (and leave out something that others would want/need to be said).
:::I consciously ''tried'' to convey all of what I've just said by just five words, you'll notice. Maybe ten words would have been better? [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 00:10, 16 April 2026 (UTC)
::I did actually define it, plain as day! Excessive verbosity is "excessively verbose to the point of deteriorating [an explanation's] usefulness to the readers."
::Please I know this has been something of a pattern for years now, and I don't know who all is involved or how many, of course, but could you please try showing some restraint? For example, when you're typing a long paragraph and you're not 100% sure it would make the explanation clearer or more helpful in some concrete way, would you please consider posting it on the talk page and asking others whether they think it should be added, or at least ask others for help with brevity? [[Special:Contributions/2603:800C:1200:596A:FDFE:A728:80A:5859|2603:800C:1200:596A:FDFE:A728:80A:5859]] 01:00, 17 April 2026 (UTC)
:::They do have a point, IPv4. Many of your comments exceed 1,000 bytes in length, and most go above 500.<br>
:::1)''"If some information is there but looks superfluous to someone, they might remove it."'' Most people are probably going to be encouraged ''not'' to edit other people's comments (see [[User talk:42.book.addict#Editing other people's words?|here]])<br>
:::2)''"In the two editing examples, they aren't even explanation additions..."'' That's precisely the point. Large additions to explanations are fine, if it all relates to the comic in some way. Large talk page replies, however, are much harder to navigate.<br>
:::3)''"Perhaps I personally err on maintaining a verbosity (that can be skipped over by the impatient reader) rather than risk being too laconic (and leave out something that others would want/need to be said)."'' The issue is that all the important things are sprinkled throughout your explanation and '''can't''' be skipped. <br>
:::If you do insist on being as verbose as you are, perhaps it would be a good idea to add a TL;DR? Just a thought.--'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="font-family:Times; color:#023020">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User_talk:DollarStoreBa'al|<span style="font-family:Times; color:#000080">'''''converse'''''</span>]]</sup> 13:19, 17 April 2026 (UTC)
::::Ahoy there, from IPv4-land, again. I think you're misreading something. You're talking about Talk: comments being overlong. I'm not sure anyone else is.
::::The OP says "...for '''explanations''' which are considered excessively verbose..." (my emphasis added). Only in the more recent "...would you please consider posting it on the talk page and..." suggestion is OP mentioning Talk:, and that's as a suggestion of doing that ''instead'' of being wordy in the Explanation.
::::I also disagree that my two highlighted additions ({{diff|410387|this}} and {{diff|410328|this}}) are overlong. Not as short as they could be, but only significantly so by not saying things I wanted to say. Whether I not I should have, is another matter.
::::Not much more to add, that hasn't already been mentioned. So I won't. Have a nice day! [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 18:41, 17 April 2026 (UTC)
:::((Hi, I'm not the above IPv4, but I am someone you used as an example. And I could respond to DSB's comments (that edit-conflicted with me writing the following), as I think they are arguments directed against me too, but that would add ''another half hour or more of writing, down-editing, reviewing, adding back in things that I should ''not'' have edited out, etc. So, instead, I'm just prepending this little blurb. But it seems like I'm of a like mind/''modus operandi'' as the other protagonist here. Though was reluctant to jump in to comment on this 'suggestion' right from the start. But here I am now. Sorry!))
:::No, sorry. You're still being subjective there, as already said by someone else. If people add more information, it's generally because they think that such information is missing. Or responding to comments (or interpretations) from others who hadn't already 'got it'.
:::I absolutely don't mind if my attempts to explain something are re-edited to be less wordy than I might have left them, though. That's the nature of wiki-editing. And, if someone removes or wrongly paraphrases something (of mine, or anyone else), I reserve the right to go back and make it correct once more.
:::The exception is with Talk comments:
:::#Other than totally removing something that totally violates site policy, you do ''not'' remove or edit someone else's Talk contribution, beyond any peripheral formatting (e.g. adding a missing signature, correcting a clear indentation misalignment or, with very great care, making it more readable as far as newlines, bulletpoints, tabulation, etc, if the OA cocked that up) and ''never'' change the substantive text... even for spelling.
:::#Things written in Talk are not part of the Explanation and should not be assumed to be read by anyone reading the Explanation.
:::#They also need not be as 'perfect' as one might try to write in an Explanation, be they either more jokey, full of spelling/grammar errors. This is not the "voice of the site, for we are legion", but individually attributable (more or less) voices that may display confusion, authoritativeness, malapropriate terminology, the desire to say "FIRST!" and/or complaints about everyone else doing any or all the the other things.
:::#Should someone ''happen'' to make a cogent point in Talk, it almost never is suitable to just copypaste their exact words (less the signature - if there was any!) into the main Explanation (or even within the 'incomplete'-notification. If they thought it was ready for the Explanation, they'd have written it there, and probably used a different phrase (I write from experience, here!)
:::#And there is very little reason to go through the collaborative editing process on Talk, with multiple versions (and critiques) of the 'concept' text being left for everyone to see all the false starts and mis-steps and the like. When the ''very idea'' of the main Wiki page is that it's a collaborative editing place that gets refined to the best result it can be (or, maybe, just one of the 'least worst' ones), without all the messy re-versioning details on show (but still there in the History, for the curious).
:::(And I note that DSB highlit one of ''my'' Talk contributions, above, as an example of overloquaciousness... Strangely, one that {{diff|410161|looked somewhat appreciated}}, unless that was actually intended as sarcasm, but lacked sufficient markup to reveal that as its purpose. Yes, it was significantly longer than the first response (which I think was good, as far as it went), but I thought that *maybe* a few more details wouldn't go amiss. In leiu of possible further questions that might have occured without.)
:::So, no. I reject your request to 'discuss things in Talk, i advance' any time I think I might not be adding a perfectly cromulant smattering of knowledge. I know that I will never write laconicallg enough to please every reader, especially without making it so streamlined that someone else will have to request (or fulfill) further expansion to it.
:::"Should we have a category"? Maybe. What are you thinking? Some template-led thing, used either like the {{template|Actual citation needed}} or {{template|incomplete}} ones, or somewhere betwixt the two, in application/functionality? What if some adds an <code><nowiki>{{Excessive verbosity}}</nowiki></code> tag and someone disagrees enough to remove it again? Are we back to arguing it out in Talk (like we do already), and/or whole paragraphs being pre-emptively removed (like is done already), or are we supposed to stop doing that and instead populate the tag with 'reason=' information?
:::Not entirely sure what the "community portal link to it" is about, though. Adding a way to get to [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#Excessive verbosity|this section]]? Or adding a link to each tagged example ''from'' this section?
:::The observation, in several ways, needs further explanation and elaboration (totally unintended, but I ''just'' realised how ironic that is!). Can I (and my fellow word-technicians, such as the prior responder) possibly shave off a word or two? Probably. But I personally try (amongst other editing issues) to address inconsistencies and gaps in information that I see have not yet been addressed. If someone wants to improve on what I add, within a comic page, then they can. Better something there, imperfect, than just lacking because of the possibility of some arbitrary word-/paragraph-limit being breached due to my 'interference'. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.236.33|82.132.236.33]] 14:44, 17 April 2026 (UTC)

I created [[[[:Category:Excessive verbosity]]]] and mentioned it at the end of [[explain xkcd:Community portal]]. I have a plan to fill it with initially the 20-30 worst offending explanations using AI, but I need to run some experiments first. [[User:Liv2splain|Liv2splain]] ([[User talk:Liv2splain|talk]]) 08:59, 18 April 2026 (UTC)
:What actual criteria will assess the issue of "worst offending", can I ask? I ask this seriously, but I might as well tell you that I predict that you won't have a cogent answer. Especially if you're going for the same enumeration as that graph that was created. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 20:55, 18 April 2026 (UTC)
::Whether the text is too verbose to serve the readers as a copyedit for brevity could. (By the way, did you know in the year 1600 the typical English written sentence had about 50 words?) [[User:Liv2splain|Liv2splain]] ([[User talk:Liv2splain|talk]]) 04:55, 23 April 2026 (UTC)
:::Poking my nose back in... Is the valuation then based upon something like "we asked 100 readers to rank the readability, and used IRV to produce the community-accepted order of best to worst"? Or "nominate your fifty worst examples, and the ones with most votes get looked at", Either of those would be awkward to organise properly.
:::Or are we asking an AI (multiple times, and/or multiple AIs) to do this ranking, knowing that AIs are ineffably tied to their training data in ways that can be unpredictably spurious. (As an example, it could mark down anything written by an IP, having identified that as a key indicator, if given the option. Like the cases of AIs 'learning' to diagnosing illnesses based upon the presence of a measuring scale in a diagnostic photograph, or a certain type of acute medicine hospital name in the past treatment records.) What would it make of the sentence "Colourless green dreams sleep furiously", and would it know if it is even a contextually apt statement or not, for any given usage?
:::The 50 words thing is interesting, if ''that's'' the key to your suggestion, but hardly a good scale for multiple reasons. Case in point: your first sentence is 16 words. It is brief. It also took me a while to realise it wasn't an accidentally unfinished "Whether <foo> could <bar>" enquiry, and a couple of other garden-path mis-steps, before realising its grammatic intent.
:::Counting words isn't enough. Short sentences more readable? (Or it is non-linear.) Correct horse battery staple! Must be grammatical, naturally. Not comic joke call-back. But what about punctuation? Commas in right places. Semi-colons: good or bad? Is this paragraph readable? All statements, four words. It is fun writing. But not easy, regardless. Fluid reading remains uncertain. Seems stilted to me. Sesquipedalian loquaciousness preponderantly undisallowed. You get the idea..?
:::The truth is that there's no easy (non-subjective) measure of readability, and whatever you do use to measure it may have little connection to understandability, practical meaning or actual accuracy/relevence, and attempts to enhance any or all of the latter may ''require'' some loss of mere 'brevity'. This is not to say that I consider my own contributions unimprovable, just that they (should) say what I intend them to say, and to the extent I intend to say them. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.238.56|82.132.238.56]] 10:16, 23 April 2026 (UTC)

Why not simply use the incomplete tag? My main contribution to this wiki in the last months was to cut down explanations to the point. If I stumble upon an explanation that I feel is too bloated but I don't have the time or energy to do it myself at that moment I add the incomplete tag, mention that the explanation needs to be shortened and done. Oftentimes I do it then myself some time later and remove the tag again. I don't see the point of a new category. Speaking of bloating up stuff... ;) [[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 08:53, 23 April 2026 (UTC)
:I agree, for what it's worth. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.238.56|82.132.238.56]] 10:16, 23 April 2026 (UTC)
:Agreed. It should simply say which part of the explanation needs works, and what exactly it needs. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 12:26, 25 April 2026 (UTC)

== possible new "superheroes" category ==

i don't edit this wiki very often, but i recently decided to make a "superheroes" category since i was surprised we didn't have one already. i've been going thru the archives and adding comics, but today i noticed a bunch of the edits were reverted by one person with the reason "no such category". do i need to do something to get the category approved or were the reversions incorrect? [[Special:Contributions/216.145.71.130|216.145.71.130]] 21:03, 29 April 2026 (UTC)
:As the reverter, I'm suggesting that the way this is normally done is to notice the need and suggest that it is created, listing (at least some of) the cases.
:While anyone with page-creation capabilities (not you, and not me) can "unredlink" the category, it'd be useful to make sure it's not just being created because of one person's vague moment of inspiration.
:Not to say that you're unjustified, in this case, just that you hadn't gone any way to ''try'' to justify it. And it's better to do that. (The old phrase "better to ask forgiveness than permission" isn't really applicable here.) I'll happily help repopulate the new category, if and when it is decided to get created. Just it was being done the wrong way round.
:Someone else {{diff|411372|mentioned}} that its name might need rethinking, and that's one of the aspects. Yes, it can be renamed, but still much better to be right to start with.
:So I think it should be open to discussion... enough to convince someone else to make it a valid category, ''then'' start adding them back in again.
:If I've picked them all up, BTW, I think the following are your candidates:
:*[[273: Electromagnetic Spectrum]] - (just copied from below, not sure without checking... maybe Superman?)
:*[[663: Sagan-Man‎‎]] - "Sagan-Man", as per title
:*[[700: Complexion‎‎]] - Batman
:*[[980: Money‎‎]] - Batman mentioned
:*[[1004: Batman‎‎]] - natch
:*[[1010: Etymology-Man‎‎]] - "Etymology-Man", of course/
:*[[1012: Wrong Superhero‎‎]] - and again
:**[[:Category:Etymology-Man‎‎]] - and his own category (of just two appearances...)
:*[[1384: Krypton‎‎]] - Superman
:*[[1394: Superm*n‎‎]] -sprt-of Superman
:*[[1415: Ballooning]] - Spiderman
:*[[1434: Where Do Birds Go]] - Superman
:*(Feel free to edit in any more, anybody!)
:...so, along with any other finds, if it looks like we need [[:Category:Comics containing superheroes]] (or similar) then your existing work hasn't gone to waste. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 21:42, 29 April 2026 (UTC)
::for archiving's sake, there's also [[273: Electromagnetic Spectrum]], [[1415: Ballooning]], and [[1434: Where Do Birds Go]].
::it would be nice to have character pages for specific superheroes like superman and batman (and, evidently, etymology-man), but "superheroes" in general is a topic, not a character. as for the name, it's in line with categories like [[:Category:Aliens]], [[:Category:Demons]], and [[:Category:Sysadmins]] which are plural and don't start with "comics featuring". we do have [[:Category:Comics featuring children]], but it seems like an oddball to me (maybe because it's more of a meta-category for the characters page than one intended for casual browsing? dunno.)
::should we continue discussing this here, on the character page talk, or somewhere else? i must admit i don't understand the organization. [[Special:Contributions/216.145.71.130|216.145.71.130]] 22:09, 29 April 2026 (UTC)
:::The wiki can be a bit inconsistent, because it's been going for a while and not everyone has gone with the same 'house style' (which may have changed over time, too). We have [[:Category:Comics with babies]], for example, and also [[:Category:Comics with cursed items]]. While there are various "Category:Comics featuring <named characters, both real and fictional>", which would have more suited Etymology Man and could (if we so wish) serve for Batman, Superman, etc, individually.
:::I'm actually fairly ambivalent, but I think that it should at least have other voices agree on which way it all goes. Saves too much after-the-fact 'corrections'. But you don't want to be talking just to me about this, so I'll shut up now, and await some of the 'big hitter' accounts to weigh it all up. It doesn't need to be done right now. A couple more hours, at least... ;)[[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 22:40, 29 April 2026 (UTC)
:no response about where to talk about this yet, so i'm just going to loop the other comment in here. changing the name to be more indicative as well. [[Special:Contributions/64.189.140.8|64.189.140.8]] 07:20, 1 May 2026 (UTC)
:Sounds like a nice category to me. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:22, 1 May 2026 (UTC)
:Seems quite relevant to me. Don't really see an issue with using the category name "superheroes" [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 16:31, 1 May 2026 (UTC)
:here's the remaining ones i picked up:
:*[[1648: Famous Duos]] - batman and robin
:*[[1792: Bird/Plane/Superman]]
:*[[1848: Glacial Erratic]] - superman (title text)
:*[[1904: Research Risks]] - supervillains in general
:*[[1970: Name Dominoes]] - superman and batman (slightly up-right from the center)
:*[[2230: Versus Bracket]] - batman vs. superman and justice league vs. teen titans
:*[[2367: Masks]] - batman, spiderman, and mysterio (possibly scarecrow as well, no idea what his lore is)
:*[[2396: Wonder Woman 1984]]
:*[[3146: Fantastic Four]]
:[[Special:Contributions/151.141.68.154|151.141.68.154]] 19:21, 1 May 2026 (UTC)
::since there's been no further comments i went ahead and remade the category. if anyone with permissions can un-redlink it that'd be nice. [[Special:Contributions/64.189.140.61|64.189.140.61]] 00:49, 6 May 2026 (UTC)
:::You ''didn't'' "remake the category" because, as you say, they're redlinked until someone has sufficient reason to unredlink them. That's not the way we do things here, as explained, or else anyone could do something like [[:Category:64.189.140.61 likes creating categories]] and expect it to be created without any consideration of need.
:::I'm not opposed to the category, in principle, but the only reason I'm ''not'' (re-)reverting all those pre-emptive new redlinks is because it's too much effort right now. Which is ''not'' the best reason for failing to uphold such practical standards. Well intentioned as you are (and I don't know why nobody else supported you by instating it 'properly'), ''some'' here may see your approach as akin to vandalism. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.237.108|82.132.237.108]] 10:28, 6 May 2026 (UTC)
::: I, unlike OP, have done quite a bit more ''preparatory'' work for the potential category.
::: See all the following edits:
::: *{{diff|411888|663: Sagan-Man}}, {{diff|411889|700: Complexion}}, {{diff|411890|980: Money}}, {{diff|411891|1004: Batman}}, {{diff|411892|1010: Etymology-Man}}, {{diff|411893|1012: Wrong Superhero}}, {{diff|411894|1384: Krypton}}, {{diff|411895|1394: Superm*n}}, {{diff|411896|1415: Ballooning}}, {{diff|411897|1434: Where Do Birds Go}}, {{diff|411898|1648: Famous Duos}}, {{diff|411899|1792: Bird/Plane/Superman}}, {{diff|411900|1848: Glacial Erratic}}, {{diff|411901|1904: Research Risks}}, {{diff|411902|1970: Name Dominoes}}, {{diff|411903|2230: Versus Bracket}}, {{diff|411904|2367: Masks}}, {{diff|411905|2396: Wonder Woman 1984}}, {{diff|411907|3146: Fantastic Four}} and {{diff|411908|Category:Etymology-Man}}
::: Note that I have done three things:
:::#Chosen the [[:Category:Comics featuring Superheroes]] variation, to match (among other more individually-aimed ones) the category name used in [[:Category:Comics featuring major characters‏‎]], [[:Category:Comics featuring minor characters‏‎]], [[:Category:Comics featuring politicians]] and [[:Category:Comics featuring real people‏‎]]. Consider this my official and reasoned suggestion for what the Category should be named. Subject to any further discussion on this matter (before implementation).
:::#* Yes, there are other inconsistencies to this. But then I'd also argue that [[:Category:Etymology-Man]] really should have echoed the standard that resulted in [[:Category:Comics featuring Kidball]], too, as well the same (more historically or not) for Knit Cap, Cueball, Little Bobby Tables, etc.
:::#I've added a 'category sort index' word, for grouping in the eventual automatic category listing. This is an optional extra, and I used "multiple" for those comics that weren't (easily) just one individual Superhero, but listed those that were involved in the next thing I did. If you prefer normal comic (or category) name-order, you could remove this pipe-option. Or, ideally, cut'n'paste it into any post-category comment just for editor referencing.
:::#I have (where it seemed necessary, which is most of the time) added an apprioriate editor-'comment' after the category. Because I can't use HTML comments ''within'' HTML comments, I've rendered these with "(!-- .. --)" surrounds, which need fixing to use </> instead once the current commented-proposal surround is removed.
:::#*Note, im particular one of them... [[1904: Research Risks]], I think it was... where the comment made was that I don't think it qualified for Superhero, as it only references the concept of a Supervillain.
:::i.e. each (commented) placeholder should be easy to make into whatever (uncommented) implementation is agreed upon.
::: Now, ''please'', OP and everyone else, do not just revert (or otherwise apply) a currently non-existent category 'in the hope' that it's correct and someone with an account will just unredlink it for you as a 'done deal'. Even if I were an account-holder (of suitable, no onerous, vintage) I would not just 'make it happen' without at least some proper discussion. Can't speak for what named-users might do, off their own backs, naturally. My opinion (informed or otherwise) doesn't have any particular weight, and it's still possible I can't persuade anyone (who matters) to adopt all of my own suggestions. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 20:03, 6 May 2026 (UTC)
::::two account-holders said they approved of the idea. if this isn't proper discussion, what do you want me to do?
::::also, aside from flukes like [[:Category:Comics with cursed items]] (which should be changed imo), the "comics featuring" name is just to avoid clashing with character pages: for instance, we named it [[:Category:Comics featuring real people]] because [[:Category:Real people]] was taken. "Superheroes" isn't taken; we don't have any character pages for superheroes in the first place. [[:Category:Etymology-Man]] is a [[:Category:Miniseries|miniseries]] category, not a character category. (it has the same comics as a character category would have, granted, but it's not treated like one in any way -- hence the name!) [[Special:Contributions/64.189.140.56|64.189.140.56]] 04:13, 7 May 2026 (UTC)
::::Speaking for myself, I respect both Favi and tori's opinions, and I'm even (generally) in favour of this category. But nobody who ''can'' make it so that it isn't redlinking (simple enough... by now, even you could have done it, entirely on your own) has done so.
::::My (and others', it looks like) point has always been that it has for a long time been a fairly matter of fact process to announce "hey, I think ''this, this and this'' should be made to have ''that'' Category", some minor discussion occur, refinements/additions considered, then it gets done. If it doesn't, it's because of lack of buy-in and nobody was convinced.
::::Some things still might get done far too hastily/improperly (various Category inconsistencies are 'obvious') and the Pages To Delete tags get rolled out (where page-renaming isn't sufficient), but Deletions are even rarer than Renames (in part because of the rights required to do so), and both are outweighed by the creation of instances of what might just be considered as 'personal pet project pages' by some. That way lies indefinite expansion and random 'forgotten' stubs left all over the place, so if I have one personally overriding attitude to this whole thing, it's that of caution. I'd rather remove a redlink (otyer than abset User and User Talk ones in signatures) than let it temptingly sit there inviting the next near-newbie to create it 'because they can' (as demonstrably happens with the User/User Talk ones, anyway), regardless
::::(I haven't yet even decided upon my ''own username'' that I might use, after maybe more than a decade contributing here, which probably tells you more about me than anything else. Can't speak for others still posting via IP, like yourself.)
::::This is not me 'pulling rank', I must add. I have no 'rank' to pull, by my own decision. I'm just a random IP (as are you/any others not named yet) who just tries to do my best to do what limited things I can do to make this site operate smoothly. It was supposed to be a simple explanation of the established community convention that has tended to work well enough, and was never supposed to become 'IP-vs-IP combat', and I really hope still isn't, despite our clearly conflicting drives on how to reach the same sort of 'final' ideal (minor details varying). And I've had my own fair share of "wouldn't it be nice to have <some feature>?" not going anywhere, which I live with because this isn't 'my' site but a community one. (A strange community, naturally, but one of the better ones, out of all those I dabble in.)
::::That's the long-winded reply only here to try to explain (my, at least) previous long-winded replies. I'll leave the whole "Comics featuring" stuff undiscussed (save that, by consistency, yes, if Etymology-Man had enough appearances to merit a character page, some rearranging probably wouldn't go amiss to do the same as "Cueball"!="... featuring Cueball", etc). It's not a full on "[[386: Duty Calls]]"-type scenario, but I thought it worth a 'quick' last note as to where I'm coming from. It wasn't supposed to be this long! Sorry for wasting everyone's time, though. Even the like-minded ones? [[Special:Contributions/82.132.237.17|82.132.237.17]] 14:49, 7 May 2026 (UTC)

== Multiple Blondies, Merge Blondie/Lenhart ==

[[Blondie]] can be three different people: the [[Blondie|generic Blondie]], [[Miss Lenhart]], and [[Mrs. Roberts]] (who only appeared in the [[1337 series]] and [[327: Exploits of a Mom]]). My proposal is to change Blondie's name to Miss Lenhart, but separate Mrs. Roberts and Blondie, as they are different people. Merging Miss Lenhart and Blondie would be similar to how [[Cutie]] and [[Megan]] were merged after Megan was named a few times. [[User:YZ100]] 00:57, 6 May 2026 (UTC)
:Sounds good! I don't see why we'd need to keep using our own name when Randall has given her a different name. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:53, 9 May 2026 (UTC)
::Hmmm... not a lot of thought put in here, before the mass rejig actually happened. The same person who is explicitly a Math(s) teacher in some comics is also explicitly ''not'' into mathematics in [[1985: Meteorologist|at least one other]] (and instead has a Linguistics degree under her belt). Wish I'd said something, now, but I was already involved in the above discussion and didn't want to cause any more fuss than I had to. Oh well. Done now. (Or at least the 'easy' bit, but I suspect the other page-merging will be happening soon enough.) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 16:54, 9 May 2026 (UTC)
:::Well, that comic is particular because Blondie is used a news anchor. Iirc, Randall almost always uses either Cueball or Blondie to portray news anchors, and that comic had two news anchors so he had to use both. And even before the merger, the [[Miss Lenhart]] page said: "[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=Miss_Lenhart&oldid=409753 She may or may not represent the same character from comic to comic]". I'll add that fun fact to the page though. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:35, 10 May 2026 (UTC)
:::I agree with [[User:FaviFake]]. The only recurring characters in xkcd who represent the same character across comics are [[Black Hat]], [[Danish]], [[Beret Guy]], and technically [[White Hat]]. Miss Lenhart can do different things, and arguably it is possible for her to work part-time. But since xkcd doesn't have a fixed timeline, like in [[1139: Rubber and Glue]], [[1753: Thumb War]], or [[2869: Puzzles]], where people like Black Hat and [[Ponytail]] appear as kids, so it is possible for here to work as a news anchor in the past, if not part-time. The Miss Lenhart page says Cueball is used more commonly as a news anchor, and this could be because Lenhart works part-time. [[User:YZ100]] 21:12, 10 May 2026 (UTC)
::::I gave just ''one'' case, of several, where - similarly to "Rob is a Cueball, but a given Cueball isn't necessarily a/the Rob" - an aspect of character tied heavily to Miss Lenhart isn't one that agrees with all Blondies. My perspective remains that Miss Lenhart (when established as such) is notably as much a separate entity from generic-Blondie as Mrs Roberts is another, and we previously we had this decent distinction of definite-Misses Lenharts, definite-Mrs Robertses and all other generic Blondies that were neither suggested to be (at least part of the time) mathematics teachers nor hacker-moms.
::::Then there's the separate issue, in that same Meteorologist comic, that the Blondie/whoever (like Cueball) clearly isn't even really a News Anchor (part time or otherwise), and actual TV meteorologists/weather-presenters (even budding/probationary ones, who should have started off by being ''actual'' meteorologists who then are seen as suitable candidates to dip their toe into being a media personality) tend to be entirely different people from the journalists who present the news. The lesson is that justifying a positive truth from the the comics is tricky, but inconsistencies support various negative truths mmore practical
::::In the end, there's pretty much as much logic to consider all (ex-)Blondies to be Mrs. Roberts, ''instead''. Or, as a better combination of matches, some are Lenhart and some are Roberts. (Or, a better-match/lesser-mismatch, would leave at least some Blondies as still 'only' a generic Blondie) Though the decision has been made now, so I was only here to point out some of the various problems invoked but apparently not even considered. [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 22:42, 10 May 2026 (UTC)
:::In [[1985: Meteorologist]], Lenhart has a Linguistics degree and she teaches grammar in [[3229: Grammar]]. She isn't limited to just math, like how she teaches science in [[3132: Coastline Similarity]]. Besides, being a math teacher and a mathematician are not the same thing. [[User:YZ100]] 4:50, 12 May 2026 (UTC)
:::: You are of course {{w|begging the question}}, by insisting that the person/people with a Linguistics/Grammar background is Miss Lenhart, ''then'' using that as further proof as to why you are correct to say they are all the same person. Try not to do that. [[Special:Contributions/82.132.221.157|82.132.221.157]] 13:37, 12 May 2026 (UTC)

== Page for What if? questions ==
Let's make a page for What if? questions we all have and take some of those questions to send to Randall? This may also help revive the blog articles. Does anyone have any other ideas? [[User:YZ100|YZ100]] 4:38, 14 May 2026 (UTC)
:I think that Randall might be working on some other projects. Added a question onto [[User:FaviFake]]'s page in regards to whether or not What If? will be continued in the future. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 19:00, 14 May 2026 (UTC)
:He doesn't really work on any projects like What if? 2 or What if? x10 anymore and the blag was discontinued. He works on the video series these days. But the whole point of What if? is for him to answer our questions. [[User:YZ100]] 22:43, 29 May 2026 (UTC)

== Clearing up how to become a trusted user ==

As a new user myself, the tiny section on why you can't make a user page yet is vague and annoying. Few edits? How many? Who makes you a trusted user, what is the process, etc are questions that many people ask. Just saying it would be nice for a better explanation on how to become a trusted user. Thanks :) [[User:Black Hat's Hat|Black Hat's Hat]] ([[User talk:Black Hat's Hat|talk]]) 18:08, 21 May 2026 (UTC)
:Not that it is my decision on how to approach this, I (as you can see from my non-username status, being ''far'' from being an official 'trusted user') prefer the vague nature.
:If you define a line, then people will delibretely push right up to this line. Either in this kind of case where someone desires to get the enhanced abilities (for good or ill) and will do the exact minimum necessary to get to that point, or for limits of behaviour (such as being told "you may call your fellow forumites <beep>, <boop> or <censored>, but using <nastier word> is an instabanning offence>").
:The actual criteria for page-creation abilities is not that difficult to achieve (and have been explicitly mentioned elsewhere), but is not just a single threashold. I might liken it to "it's better to travel hopefully than arrive", in that until the ''very point'' that someone realises that they have accomplished the ability to create new pages (any new pages, not just their own userpages), you have probably eased yourself into how the site works and appreciated its general construction and will then only create new pages that they have some amount of genuine justification for wanting to create (to save others having to clear up after some "Template:Cool, I can create new pages!" splurge, or similar...)
:Ok, so it's not exactly a guaranteed method of getting a more considerate userbase, but it's better than automatically treating it as a [[3246: Speedrun]] and missing out on the more general atmosphere there is to be had here.
:Also, it doesn't at all stop you getting User Pages set up, ''right now''. You just need to mention that you'd like them - as you maybe just have done - and any pre-established user can decide that they're happy to create them for you... if that's all you want to actually create, then you might never do any more and just continue to edit exactly as you're currently editing.
:The point at which you realise that you ''can'' create new pages (you hit a redlink, by accident or curiosity, and get given the option to unredlink it ...whether or not you then go through with it) can then be just give you a fuzzy feeling and a realisation that you've 'arrived'.
:...but, again, this is just my view. Having seen many new users, and come to admire many of those that stuck around and have done great things. I would gladly see you as one of them, even if I would advise against undue impatience on the way to getting there. Having checked your activity, I ''will'' say that you're not ''too'' far off, but I'll not enumerate exactly how distant that point will be... That'd be like setting up a finishing tape and encouraging you to recklessly sprint for it. ;) [[Special:Contributions/81.179.199.253|81.179.199.253]] 20:49, 21 May 2026 (UTC)
::Makes sense ☃ [[User:Black Hat's Hat|Black Hat's Hat]] ([[User talk:Black Hat's Hat|talk]]) 17:48, 22 May 2026 (UTC)

== "It's 'cause you're dumb" ==

In another conversation, I said: "Why is [[Black Hat]] saying it? He's a [[72: Classhole|classhole]], so he knows a better way to insult than just saying "It's 'cause you're dumb." It would make more sense if [[Danish]] were saying it, as she was never given to be a classhole." I stand by my statement. Either delete it or make Danish say it. [[User:YZ100|YZ100]] ([[User talk:YZ100|talk]]) 22:38, 29 May 2026 (UTC)
:I'd go for deleting it. I've never understood it. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:38, 30 May 2026 (UTC)

Miss Lenhart

2026-05-30T10:34:31Z

FaviFake: read :Category:News anchor

{{Infobox character
| image = Blondie.png
| imagesize = 200px
| caption = '
| first_appearance = [[59: Graduation]]
}}

<noinclude>:''For a list of comics, see [[:Category:Comics featuring Miss Lenhart|Comics featuring Miss Lenhart]].''</noinclude>

'''Miss Lenhart''' is a [[stick figure]] character in [[xkcd]]. She is most often used as a math teacher and a [[:Category:News anchor|news anchor]], but is often featured in the background of other comics when Randall needs additional characters. Like most other xkcd characters, she does not necessarily represent the same character from comic to comic. She is distinguished by her long blonde hair. In [[1817: Incognito Mode]], her hair is significantly more detailed.

==Roles==

Miss Lenhart is mainly just another woman that [[Randall]] can use when he wishes to give a woman a specific characteristic so to set her aside from the more commonly used women [[Megan]] and [[Ponytail]]. The hacker [[Mrs. Roberts]] is another [[:Category:Minor characters|minor characters]] who has the same appearance as Miss Lenhart.

===Math teacher===
[[File:Miss lenhart.png|thumb|200px|Miss Lenhart as a math teacher]]
Miss Lenhart is the go-to character when [[Randall]] needs a teacher. There are several cases where Miss Lenhart is described as a math teacher. Her name is used in this context in her first comic [[135: Substitute]], and she is both named and drawn in [[1050: Forgot Algebra]] as a math teacher. She is also teaching mathematics in [[263: Certainty]], [[622: Haiku Proof]], [[1724: Proofs]], and [[2605: Taylor Series]].

Her career appears to closely follow the trajectory of a public-school math teacher at either the middle or high school level as teachers become subject specific at that point. Teacher's lounges and substitutes are also features of the North American secondary school system. In [[1519: Venus]] and [[803: Airfoil]] she is seen teaching two non-math science related classes, which is something else that happens in American schools due to a general shortage of qualified STEM teachers.

In [[1519: Venus]], it is confirmed that Miss Lenhart is one month away from retirement (which is shown to result in taking her teaching duties less seriously. Being forced to teach outside her subject matter expertise (Earth/Environmental Science instead of Math) may have factored into her decision, but regardless, public sector teachers in the United States generally still earn pensions and are able to retire earlier than other workers.

After [[1519: Venus]], we see Miss Lenhart transition to college level material such as [[2028: Complex Numbers]], [[2545: Bayes%27 Theorem]], [[2560: Confounding Variables]] and [[2283: Exa-Exabyte]]. If she did in fact retire early from public secondary school education, it would be possible for her to supplement her pension as an adjunct professor teaching college level science and math courses at a community or state institution of higher education, despite teaching grammar in [[3229: Grammar]].

In some early comics, such as [[435: Purity]] and [[599: Apocalypse]], Miss Lenhart is portrayed as a mathematician. However, in [[1985: Meteorologist]] she is explicitly ''not'' into mathematics and instead has a Linguistics degree under her belt.

===News anchor===
[[File:Miss Lenhart as a news anchor.png|thumb|200px|Miss Lenhart as a news anchor]]
[[Cueball]] and Miss Lenhart are the most used character for presenting news reports in the role of a news anchor, but [[:Category:News anchor|Cueball is used more often than her]].

===Mother===
Miss Lenhart appears to be the wife of a Cueball-like character in [[275: Thoughts]]. In [[416: Zealous Autoconfig]] and [[342: 1337: Part 2]], both Miss Lenhart and Mrs. Roberts are portrayed as mothers with at least two children. Miss Lenhart is also depicted as a mother in a few other comics, such as:
*[[200: Bill Nye]], with two boys.
*[[275: Thoughts]], having a daughter.
*[[946: Family Decals]], left family wagon with three children, two boys and a girl.
*[[1608: Hoverboard]], [http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/a/ae/1608_0970x1077y_Kite_and_weird_bug.png next to the volcano] where she is with her daughter. The boy might be the daughter's friend or her brother.

==Name==
Miss Lenhart is a minor character in xkcd, but has had several appearances without ever being named in general. In fact, she has only been named twice where she is actually drawn. The first time she's named is in her second appearance, [[135: Substitute]]. The first time she is both drawn and mentioned by name is in [[499: Scantron]], and the only other time (so far by comic 1731) is in [[1050: Forgot Algebra]]. But her name was used before for a not-shown teacher in [[135: Substitute]], which is why it makes sense to call the math teacher in [[263: Certainty]] Miss Lenhart. That would thus make it the first time she appeared as a character in a comic.

Her family name is again the only thing used in [[416: Zealous Autoconfig]], although there it does not directly say that she is a teacher. While school is mentioned, it is for her children. Thus, the name is first connected directly to the blonde teacher in her fifth "appearance" after she was also drawn in [[442: xkcd Loves the Discovery Channel]].

Later, her name is used again without her being present, except on the phone in [[704: Principle of Explosion]]. Here, she is Mrs. Lenhart. It is possible that this character is the mother of Miss Lenhart. Or, because she here obviously has a son, she may have been married after she was originally named Miss. This is the second time she has been mentioned to be a mother. Both Miss Lenhart and one of the other named Miss Lenhart-like character [[Mrs. Roberts]] is shown to be a mother. In [[2808: Daytime Firefly]], the off-screen character of "{{w|Ms.}} Lenhart" is mentioned in the title text (in an imagined conversation with a male teacher) who could be this main character, if not just one or other of her relatives.

Her name is mentioned in total six times. So, the other comics with Miss Lenhart refer to a teacher with her appearance, just like [[Megan]] only has been named a few times but is still used to describe the general dark-haired woman. However, Miss Lenhart must have long blonde hair, so a teacher with her hair in a ponytail, like in [[982: Set Theory]], is not Miss Lenhart but [[Ponytail]], even though the teaching method reminds of the one in [[1724: Proofs]] with Miss Lenhart.
{{navbox-characters}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Minor characters]]

Miss Lenhart

2026-05-30T10:33:56Z

FaviFake: Undo revision 413868 by YZ100 (talk)

3085: About 20 Pounds

2026-05-30T10:26:10Z

FaviFake:

{{comic
| number = 3085
| date = May 5, 2025
| title = About 20 Pounds
| image = about_20_pounds_2x.png
| imagesize = 666x278px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = In addition to gravity, burritos interact through the strong, weak, and electromagnetic forces, which is believed to be a major contributor to their popularity.
}}

==Explanation==

The nature of {{w|dark matter}} is a significant {{w|List of unsolved problems in physics|unsolved problem in physics}}. We observe that galaxies spin faster than we expect based on the nearby observable matter. Also, Galaxies seemed more clumped than are supposed to be only observing the normal matter, and this has led to physicists to believe there is non-visible mass that is clumping the galaxies together. Dark matter is the name we give to this mass. In the comic, [[Cueball]] and [[Ponytail]] consult an {{w|oracle}}-envisioned as a small black ball- to learn about dark matter, & solve these problems. The oracle responds by saying that Dark Matter is a particle, weighing about 20 pounds - So not any way near as grand as expected.

So, mission solved, the scientists ask the oracle what they are to do, given how they now know what it is, and cannot proceed further. The oracle then suggests they get {{w|burritos}}, taking the [[1269|Beret Guy view on things]]-if all goes wrong, at least there's still burritos.

The pentagram and candles suggest that the oracle is supernatural, summoned by an occult ritual; something which would present its own challenges to our understanding of the physical world. There may be a pun here, in that they may be using 'dark magic' to communicate with something from the 'dark realm' on the assumption that it will know about dark matter. However, the word 'dark' in dark matter simply means that we do not know how to observe it; we have no evidence that dark matter is evil or satanic, though [[Randall]] may consider it [[:Category:Comics with cursed items|cursed]].

The title text justifies the unscientific approach of giving up and getting burritos, by pointing out that burritos interact through all four known {{w|fundamental interactions}}, making burritos popular - adding the 'science' to the meal (although arguably [[1158|everything is science]]). The electromagnetic force mediates the chemical reactions leading to a burrito's taste, the strong force keeps atomic nuclei together, and gravity gives burritos heft, all of which are helpful for enjoying them. It's hard to see how the weak force, which takes part in radioactive decay, helps with burrito enjoyment or popularity, but the weak force is responsible for the nuclear fusion that allowed the complex elements of the burrito to exist in the first place.

The previous comic [[3084: Unstoppable Force and Immovable Object]] dealt with particles which do not even interact with gravity.
In [[2035: Dark Matter Candidates]] these 20 lb dark matter particles fit between magic 8 balls and space cows. The squirrels that make up [[2186: Dark Matter]] near the earth must be pretty chunky. Talking to a floating sphere is becoming [[:Category:Time traveling Sphere|a returning subject in xkcd]].

==How dark matter actually works==

In general, not all forces interact with all particles; indeed, {{w|gravity}} is believed to be the only force that interacts with everything we have observed. If a force doesn't interact with a particle, then the particle's existence cannot be directly observed via disturbances in that force. In particular, something that doesn't interact with electromagnetism cannot be 'seen', as photons will pass through it relatively unaffected, and likewise cannot be felt, because collision is a side effect of the {{w|Pauli exclusion principle}}.

Even {{w|neutrino}}s, famous for {{what if|73|interacting with ''almost'' nothing}}, still interact via the {{w|weak force}}, allowing them to be detected with sufficiently large tanks of dense material. This is the main reason neutrinos cannot be dark matter: they interact far too much to be a viable option. A particle that interacts with ''nothing'' except gravity could only be detected by a {{w|LIGO|gravitational telescope}}.

There is one dark matter candidate where the only interaction is overwhelmingly gravitational: black holes formed through collapse in the early Universe. These {{w|primordial black holes}} may not be detectable through any terrestrial experiment. However, even these objects can be found through their lensing effects if they are sufficiently large and common to account for the 'missing mass' we are looking for. Black holes of around 10 kg would also likely quickly evaporate through Hawking radiation, so are not a good dark matter candidate. Black holes of around asteroid mass would be extremely hard to detect and are a good dark matter candidate given current information.

The particle's mass is described vaguely as ''about twenty pounds'', roughly 10 kilograms, in line with how all-knowing oracles legendarily use ambiguous statements. This is a ludicrous amount of energy for particle physics. Any interaction would have to involve an equally ludicrous amount of other particle mass being in exactly the right place and time, a coincidence that might be so rare that one would not expect it to occur ever in the history of the universe. By comparison, the {{w|top quark|heaviest single particle}} we have observed, with a mass over a hundred times that of the proton, is around a tenth of a trillionth of a trillionth of a pound.

Under more normal circumstances, we might still hope to observe the properties of the particle via creating it ourselves under controlled laboratory conditions. But again, there is no reasonable way to focus the energy required into a single particle interaction. The {{w|Large Hadron Collider|most powerful particle accelerator in the world}}, for example, peaks at about ten thousand times the mass of the proton (a solid billion times less energy than required) so it's out too. 20 pounds is about 2.6e36 eV which is way over any accelerator could achieve in the foreseeable future.

Despite all this, twenty pounds is also much too ''small'' to be detectable via gravitational interaction; its {{w|Perturbation (astronomy)|influence on the orbits of planets}}, say, or the strength of its {{w|gravitational lensing}} effect, would be entirely negligible. In the scenario posed by the comic, then, there is no plausible way to observe more about dark matter while on Earth. Even if we did find some such particles naturally occurring, and had instruments that could measure such small gravitational forces, since it would interact only via gravity, the only properties it could have other than mass would be its decay rates from other particles. Which, again, would all be essentially nil, due to its mass.

Dark matter also plays a role in slowing the expansion of our universe through gravity, in a tug-of-war with dark energy, the force which speeds up the expansion of the universe. However, recent studies show that dark energy is weakening, making the expansion possibly slow,{{acn}} so the universe might even end by crunching back into a point like it was before the Big Bang. This is called the "Big Crunch" effect.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Ponytail are standing in front of a pentacle with lit candles at the corners. A black sphere, the oracle, is floating above the middle of the pentacle.]
:Ponytail: Dear oracle,
:Ponytail: What is the nature of dark matter?
:Oracle: It's about 20 pounds.

:[Close up of oracle]
:Off-panel: What?
:Oracle: Dark matter is a particle. It weighs about 20 pounds.
:Oracle: It only interacts through gravity.

:[Same view as first panel]
:Cueball: Only gravity, huh?
:Cueball: So none of our experiments are really going to tell us any more about it, then.
:Oracle: Afraid not.

:[Same view as first and third panels, except Cueball lifted his forearm.]
:Cueball: So what do we do?
:Oracle: You should go out for burritos.
:Ponytail: How will that help?
:Oracle: Well
:Oracle: Burritos are pretty good.

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Cosmology]]
[[Category:Food]]

Talk:what if? articles

2026-05-27T15:18:42Z

FaviFake:

{{TOC}}Note: I moved over the discussion page from my [[User talk:FaviFake|talk page]], which is where the merger of the two what if? indexes was initially coordinated and organized. Most of the topics below were originally created on [[User talk:FaviFake]]. Thanks! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:21, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

----
==Introduction to coordinate the merger==
Hey! This is intended to be a space to coordinate the merging of the two tables. I see that [[User:1234231587678]] and [[User:Apollo11]] have been helping us create the two tables! I'm messaging you to coordinate a little bit. Since we're the 3 most active editors, let's coordinate!

My idea for the table was the following: there would be one single sortable table instead of two, and the information density would be very high. There were the columns I had in mind:

* N

* Date (the date YYYY-MM-DD, and then includes week after prev. article)

* Thumbnail

* Title (hyperlinked)

* Reader's question

* Randall's answer

* Book - in something like this format: '''WI?2, n. 40''' (BOOK1,2,3, nr. ARTICLE NUMBER), which is easily sortable by book - for unnumbered, use the assumed number with an asterisk like this: 69* - this column would also be color coded, by book - this would also contain the title in the book if different - empty when not in any book

* YT (the date YYYY-MM-DD, and then a hyperlinked link with the YT title. if the title is the same, don't repeat it) empty when not on YT

----

I realise my mistake was listing the things we had to do together with the huge task, merging the tables! So what happened is you both contributed, but each of you contribued to a different table. In an attempt to solve this, i have created my own table, which is ready to receive the two additional columns!

'''I believe this third table (available at [[User:FaviFake]]) is the best option for us to work on the index together, so that once it has the 2 additional columns and contains all the articles, we can put it on the blog page and delete the [[What If? chapters]] table. What do you think?'''

I have also made other adjustments:

*Made the Date column nowrap, so the date doesn't wrap around, and made the first column (N) centered and '''bold'''

*Turned each Reader's question cell italic, and added quotation marks to the start and end of each cell. Ex: HOW OLD? becomes ''"HOW OLD?"''

* In the Randall's answer column, split the rows into one per question. For example, if there are 5 bullet points in 1 cell, split the "Reader's question" and the "Randall's answer" columns into 5 rows for that particular Article so that each question has its own mini-row.

*Added file link to all rows so you can just click to go straight to the upload file page.

*<s>'''Downgrade''': titles aren't hyperlinked</s> - {{Done}} Update: I manually hyperlinked all of them!
'''
*'''Downgrade''': the last ~100 articles are missing. I'll try to add them the day after tomorrow! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:06, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

:Regarding the additional 2 columns: I've been thinking a lot about how we should do them. I see 4 options:

:*'''Option 1: Separate Tables''' - separate tables for the YouTube video information and book information, and link articles across tables using the "N" column (or another unique identifier like the title). Advantages: Keeps sorting straightforward in each table. Maintains the integrity of your original table while allowing for sorting by videos and books in their respective tables. Flexible for adding future metadata. Disadvantages: Requires users to cross-reference between tables, which can be inconvenient.

:*'''Option 2: Expand Rows with Sub-Rows''' - How it works: For each article, add one or two additional sub-rows (One for YouTube video information (e.g., YT video number, link, title, thumbnail), and one for book information (e.g., book number, article number, title, color-coded cell). Advantages: Keeps all information together, visually grouped by article. Makes it easy to see all data without leaving the main table. Disadvantages: Sub-rows might disrupt column sorting. Could make the table visually cluttered for articles with both video and book.

:*'''Option 3: Additional Columns''' - new columns for: (FIRST COLUMN) YouTube video number, link, title, and thumbnail, and, (SECOND COLUMN) Book name, article number, title, and color-coding. Advantages: Sorting by videos or books is easy. Keeps all information in a single row. Disadvantages: The table becomes much wider, which can reduce readability on smaller screens. Many empty cells for articles without video or book.

:I've also thought about using a template. What do you think of the idea of a creating a template like these:

{{Done}} UPDATE: i did create the templates! See the top of [[User:FaviFake]]! <s>

<nowiki>{{yt|YTNUMBER (1, 2, 3, etc)|YTLINK|VIDEOTITLE (optional)}}</nowiki>

:It would be used in the column that we still need to create. It would also colour the cell in '''red'''. I was also thinking of doing a similar thing for the What If? books:

<nowiki>{{bk|WHICH-BOOK|CHAPTER-NUMBER|CHAPTER-TITLE (if different)}}</nowiki>

:For example, it would look like this (This one would also colour the cell based on the book, e.g., green for WI?1, yellow for WI?2, blue for WI10th ed.):

<nowiki>{{book|2|69|Jellyfish}}</nowiki>

What If? 2, chapter '''69: Jellyfish'''

:Would someone be able to create something like this? I know nothing about templates, and i doubt I'll be able to ask chatgpt to do everything for me correctly. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:28, 18 January 2025 (UTC)<s>
</s>
==1234231587678==
::I saw your message, and this would be a good idea to coordinate. Maybe also add the missing "Peptides" that was accidentally released on the blog, as index 153 (i think) or have two articles with the same index number, just putting "current" for the current article. --[[User:1234231587678|1234231587678]] ([[User talk:1234231587678|talk]]) 20:47, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

::Also I think the "0w later" or "1w later" on the comics looks a bit odd, maybe remove them entirely? The dates are already present. --[[User:1234231587678|1234231587678]] ([[User talk:1234231587678|talk]]) 20:49, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

:::Thanks for replying! I LOVE the idea of inserting the Peptides article directly in the index. It would technically make it a little less official, but I'm all for it. It looks and feels like a proper article.

:::I also fully agree with you regarding the '''1w later''' line! I do like the idea of seeing the frequency right from the index, but it's too much right now. My idea is to remove the "1w later" part, but leave it in for the articles that aren't released a week after the previous one. For example, this would keep the '''2w later''' and '''0w later''' lines for the articles that have them, but declutter the date cells of the "normal" ones. What do you think?

:::I can't do it right now, but it should be easy. We can also delay it until all articles are on the table, so we only have to do it once. Btw, I hope to get all the articles on the table by the day after tomorrow or the day after that. Meanwhile, you or other editors can add the 2 columns (Book and YT)! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 22:14, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

I currently don't have the books, so can't help with that, but I've added a few YT videos. Also the book template seems to be buggy (and/or a WIP), so I removed it from the 1st article. ALSO, the YT template display {5}<sup>th</sup> instead of 5th; weird. --[[User:1234231587678|1234231587678]] ([[User talk:1234231587678|talk]]) 15:13, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

:Thank you so much! I fixed the YT template, let me know if there are any other issues. Also, you '''can''' help with books, even if you don't have them! All you need to do is look at the page [[What If? chapters]], which catalogues every chapter of every book. The <s>[[Template:book]]</s> i was trying to create is broken because I gave up trying to make it work (1h and 20min of my life wasted). Anyways, we now have 4 different templates, one for each book (the fourth is a placeholder!): [[Template:book1]], [[Template:book2]], [[Template:book3]], [[Template:book4]]. There are instructions on hot to use them on their page. Please continue adding the videos and the books if you can! This is exactly what we need! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:18, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

==Apollo11==
This a big page so I’m not sure I’m in the right spot (also typing one handed so sorry for mistakes). I like the table on you page, however I did notice it’s missing which book it’s in and the YouTube channel. I love how the one I edited was formatted, I think if you added that table to your existing table it’d be perfect. I would also add a page number for the books. [[User:Apollo11|Apollo11]] ([[User talk:Apollo11|talk]]) 16:34, 18 January 2025 (UTC)

Ok just saw the three options. I’d go with either 1 or 3. 1 would look the best and probably be easiest to find what you’re looking for as long as your have links to the other tables very clear. What I would do is have a table with title, and where to find the article (blog, book 1, book 2, YouTube). Then have a 4 tables, one for each, where you can go more in depth about each article, date, explanation, jokes, things like that. Option 3 would be the simplest, and if that’s what you wanna do, I’d have the simplest things on the left and the more complicated things on the right. So the date and title would be in the left and the e explanation would be far to the right. You’ve probably been thinking about this a lot longer than me so I’m probably missing something, so please tell me if I’m wrong abo it anything. Also if my comment is in the wrong spot feel free to move me to the right conversation. I’d love to help in anyway!! Just give me directions and I’ll do by best!! [[User:Apollo11|Apollo11]] ([[User talk:Apollo11|talk]]) 16:58, 18 January 2025 (UTC)

: Thanks so much for your interest! I thought about it a lot today, and i landed on 1, huge, information-laden table. I think having 3 or 4 tables would be too confusing and too hard to navigate. Plus, i think i found a good way to avoid making the table too wide. I added a few articles to showcase it. I don't have a lot of time to do all of them. Regarding the page number, I used the chapter number since it's easier for people who don't own the books.

: > I’d love to help in anyway!! Just give me directions and I’ll do by best!!
: Love it! You can do everything that's listed at the top of [[User:FaviFake]], but the first one might be more annoying to do on a phone (I'm not sure where you're editing from, actually). If you don't understand something on that page, please do let me know. I promise i'll answer quicker next time. ;) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:03, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

:: Looks great!! I’ll get on it sometime early next week!! (Ftr I’m usually on a phone but sometimes I’ll go over to a computer for bigger projects, like added links and full researched paragraphs) [[User:Apollo11|Apollo11]] ([[User talk:Apollo11|talk]]) 20:56, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

::: Amazing! I hope I'll have added all the missing articles by the day after tomorrow. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:30, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

==Adding the book-exclusive articles==
I noticed that there’s not a column for if the article is in the blog. I also don't think some of the ones in the book that aren’t on the blog are in there. Please correct me if I’m wrong. [[User:Apollo11|Apollo11]] ([[User talk:Apollo11|talk]]) 18:17, 21 January 2025 (UTC)

:Yeah, I’ve noticed that some of the What If? Chapters aren’t in the table. I think that we should add them in too '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 18:42, 21 January 2025 (UTC)

::Thank you all for pointing it out! And again sorry it took me so long, I'm not good at prioritising. (but at least today i did something! I fixed both the YouTube template, there are new instructions on [[User:FaviFake]], and the book templates when used in merged cells. Anyways!)
::I had forgotten the other table also contained the book-exclusive questions! Of course we should add them! We need to think about this before doing anything though. I have so many questions!

*In what order do we put them? Unfortunately, the chapter of the book are mixed between non-excusive and exclusive.
*Do we need all the columns?
N Date Thumbnail Title Reader's question Randall's answer Books YouTube
**What happens to the unnecessary columns? We could merge them, but I'm not sure whether the sorting will work if we merge them.
*Should we change the columns, so that the '''blog number''' column is more similar to the '''Book''' and '''YouTube''' columns? Or are blog articles more important because they fill all the cells, while book-exclusives don't have all the same info?
*Is there ANY way you can think of to make the insertion of these articles into the existing index seamless? I'm usually on the side of one big index instead of many little indexes, but I'm having a hard time figuring this out. One of the main reasons I wanted to do this project was so that people wouldn't need to move between 2 different tables to see all articles.

::One way could be to just add all book-exclusive articles, each in their own row, in a big dump on the release date of the book. Even tho it would technically be in chronological order, i don't really like the idea. Please send all your thought! There must me something I'm not thinking of, or something I've been thinking wrong about! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:10, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

----

::* What order do we put them in
:: I would do it in the same order as the other table, blog articles first in chronological, what if chapters in chapter order. I believe the YouTube channel is all old questions, but if he posts a new one, then put that below the books.
::* change blog columns
::I think you should move the blog date and number to after randalls answer, similar to the books, and for the date for book exclusives maybe jus the book release date? Or NA.
::* unessery colums
:: Example?
::* Seamless integration
::Just stick them on the bottom, the exact same way you’d put another blog article on the bottom.
::I think that covers it all? [[User:Apollo11|Apollo11]] ([[User talk:Apollo11|talk]]) 19:15, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

:::Sticking the chapters at the end was the same idea I had, and I think that we can just put (What If? Exclusive) inside the date part of the table. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 19:22, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

::::Thanks for replying so quickly! I don't have time right now to read everything but I can already tell that this is much easier than I thought it would be. I'll answer tomorrow. Before i start overthinking everything: What would you put inside the columns thumbnail, Question, and Answer? Just empty? I'm trying to think of something useful.
::::Also, what do you think of merging the N (blog) column and the Date columns, just like we do with the YouTube column? Would there be any downsides?
:::: I hope I'm not preventing it edits by not adding the articles quickly, in the meantime you can help by adding YT videos, now that the template works! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:31, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

::::: I think that the YT videos are all added? At least the blog ones and not the What If? exclusive ones. Or maybe Restricted Mode on my home wifi is blocking some. But I think that it’s all done? Tried my best anyways '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 03:52, 23 January 2025 (UTC)

::::::This is great news, thanks! I didn't know there were YouTube videos on book-exclusive articles! I'll get started, this is my plan:
::::::*The book articles are positioned like the old [[What If? chapters]] table.
::::::*New column setup:
Thumbnail Title Reader's question Randall's answer '''Blog (this contains both N and Date)''' Books YouTube
::::::*The sometimes-unnecessary columns are left empty.
::::::*The '''Blog''' column is more similar to the '''Book''' and '''YouTube''' columns: it has a template and colors the cell light blue.

::::::I feel great about this! We're getting near the finish line. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:36, 23 January 2025 (UTC)

:::::::I think that I added all the What If? And What If? 2 chapters to the table for the ones that were copied from the blog '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 23:48, 23 January 2025 (UTC)

::::::::Love it! I hope i'll be able to add some of the missing articles today, but i might not be able to do them all (or any at all). --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:01, 24 January 2025 (UTC)

::::::::{{Done}} I did it! You can now add the missing YT videos :) {{unsigned|FaviFake|20:49, 24 January 2025 (UTC)}}

:::::::::Doing it now! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 21:24, 24 January 2025 (UTC)

::::::::::based on the 20 videos that I can see on the YT channel, ALL YT VIDEOS HAVE BEEN ADDED! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 21:39, 24 January 2025 (UTC)

:::::::::::We actually did it! Now all that's left are the explanations, which i'm sure people will prefer doing over merging 2 wikipedia tables. There's just one small problem: I searched for "Featured in What If?," and instead of 69 results, i got 67. This means two of the articles that are both in the book and in the blog haven't been added. Do you think you could figure out which ones? I also checked the other book and the YouTube videos, and they're all there, it's just the first book. Again, thank you so much for all your work, it would've likely taken weeks to get to this point without your efforts! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:21, 25 January 2025 (UTC)

ok, i’ll poke around and see if i can find them. also, I GOT WHAT IF? 10TH ANNIVERSARY! i can add the bonus chapter that is at the end-it’s basically “what if we tried more power” when blasting away at the moon with lasers. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 21:22, 25 January 2025 (UTC)

:Congrats on the book! I didn't buy it because i have the original, it's great that someone here owns it. Can you describe in a little more detail the last chapter? I don't understand a few things: does the second YouTube video say exactly the same thing as the blog article? Why are there two videos about 1 article? Or is the second YT video only about the Bonus Chapter in the book, which goes even further than the blog article? Is that bonus chapter not in any other book or blog? Thanks! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:13, 26 January 2025 (UTC)
:Also, is the chapter only called Bonus Chapter, or does it also have other names? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:15, 26 January 2025 (UTC)

==Sorting "Chapter xx.."==
Hi... An alternative to the way you are lead-zeroing the text cell's numeric suffix, for sorting purposes, which is what I think {{diff|363528|this is all about}}, would be to do so something like:
... || data-sort-value={{{1}}} | Chapter {{{1}}} || ...
Should be able to deal with any numeric value, while still rendering it simply as "Chapelter 1"/"Chapter 10"/"Chapter 100"/ etc, but adding ''data-sort-type="number"'' to the header cell might even be able to sort not-quite-numbers, should a future book ever do chapters like "... 7, 7a, 9, 10, 11, 12, 12b, 14, ...".
<br />Perhaps even ''data-sort-value=<booknumber>.<chapternumber>'' would be useful. Though you'd have to use the sufficient-leading-zeroes method, again, and could start at 1.0000001 ''just'' in case there's ever a million (but not more than 10mil-1) chapters in a future bookbut would probably be useful to sort all book-contained items, across all books but not interleaved.
<br/>I'll let you consider if/what you find it more useful. And perhaps check if I've given you the right table markup options by going and checking the Help:Sorting Tables/whatever pages. ;) [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.107|141.101.99.107]] 00:01, 26 January 2025 (UTC)

:I agree that the current method isn't great, and I'm very glad to see there's another, better way. Unfortunately, I don't really understand most of what you said. BUT! You seem very experienced and I don't have a lot of time, so it would be perfect if you could edit directly the templates/table/cells/whatever needs to be changed. The best option is to remove the leading zeroes and still make the sorting work, for the blog, books, and YT templates. If you (or someone else) could do that, it'd be wonderful. Please feel free to try it yourself if you want! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:13, 26 January 2025 (UTC)

== weird table bugs ==

hey favifake, i found two bugs that i don’t really know how to fix in the table: one of them is in regard to the what if 2 template, whenever it has a “S2” or a “W1” “chapter” it gives an error. the second bug can be found on the laser pointer row-i added the what if? 10th anniversary template, but the yt template doesn’t “fit” (for lack of a better word) with the table. could you dig into these and try to figure out what has gone wrong? thanks! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 00:55, 26 January 2025 (UTC)

:Hey 42! I saw what you were trying to do, i think i fixed it now? I removed the '''book3''' template from the original '''Laser Pointer''' row because all original articles are technically in the 10th Ann. book. (i added "exclusively on" to the '''book3''' template to make it clearer). Regarding the other S1 bug, i don't know why but it seems fixed now?? I saw the error just a few hours ago and now it works. I have no idea what happened. Let me know if it reappears or something. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:13, 26 January 2025 (UTC)

----

:Without going in and trying it myself, is this because of the "trying to zero-pad a number" thing (as given a possible alternative, above), because it can't test if <usually number, in this case text> is greater/less than <static number>?
:Quick-fix (not doing anything else new) would need the test enclosed with an isthisanumber? test (if so, do zero-padding testing, etc; if not, maybe don't try).
:Exactly how S2/W1 sorts (or doesn't) using the sorting data (bare number only!) and/or the forced data type as number (to do its best for what numeric data it is presented, despite occasional non-numeric interloping characters), would need testing.
:Or I misunderstand. But, ''if'' I don't, maybe this is useful additional pointer to a solution/acceptance of the problem. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.178.123|172.71.178.123]] 01:21, 26 January 2025 (UTC)

::IP user, I answered above. :) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:13, 26 January 2025 (UTC)
== Interesting streamlined 'table furniture', but... ==

...I'm wondering about the current (slight) usage differences between:
style="text-align:center" | {{{1}}}
and:
style="white-space:nowrap" |
Do you need to add the Param1 to the nowrap/remove if from the text-alignment?

And what if someone wanted no-wrap+centre at the same time? There maybe ''are'' ways to combine <code><nowiki>{{ac|<foo>}}</nowiki></code> and <code><nowiki>{{nw}}</nowiki></code>, but it seems non-trivial to to do. (Unless you make a <code><nowiki>{{nwac}}</nowiki></code>, but then where do you end?) I'm wondering if you should try it without the |-character.

Let's see if that ''could'' work:
{| class="wikitable" style="margin:auto"
|+ Test
|-
! Foo !! Bar !! Baz
|-
| Normal text of a normal style || style="text-align:center" style="white-space:nowrap" | This is as if using variations <code><nowiki>{{ac|<foo>}}</nowiki></code> and <code><nowiki>{{nw}}</nowiki></code> as rendered without the pipe-character or inconsistent parameter, which is tricky to demonstrate with the actual templates.|| More normal text of a normal style
|-
| Normal text of a normal style || style="text-align:center" | style="white-space:nowrap" | This is how <code><nowiki>{{ac|{{nw}} <foo>}}</nowiki></code> might look || More normal text of a normal style
|-
| Normal text of a normal style || {{ac|{{nw}} This is how <code><nowiki>{{ac|{{nw}} <foo>}}</nowiki></code> ''does'' look, using the current state of the templates.
----
<s>''NB. Why is it in bold? Is that a normal feature of a style of text-align:center?''</s>}}
| More normal text of a normal style
|-
| Normal text of a normal style || style="white-space:nowrap" | style="text-align:center" | This is how <code><nowiki>{{nw}} {{ac|<foo>}}</nowiki></code> might look || More normal text of a normal style
|-
| Normal text of a normal style || {{nw}} {{ac|This is how <code><nowiki>{{nw}} {{ac|<foo>}}</nowiki></code> ''does'' look, using the current state of the templates.}}
----
<s>''Also goes bold, I notice!''</s>
| More normal text of a normal style
|}

So, yes, it looks like it might be better to just remove the pipe (or pipe-and-param) and rely on the table-writer to just put in the relevent bare style-giving {{}} (or {{}}s) before the pipe. (I must look into why there's unexpected boldness. I don't know if that comes from the way you templated it or as an associated function of the aligh-center style. But it doesn't appear when I do it 'raw'.) Anyway, food for thought, over to you. It looks like I ''could'' edit your templates, but that might be rude, and would of course instantly break whatever it is you're currently using them (singly) for. That's the ''What If?'' table, I suppose? Anyway, you can both 'fix' how they work and adjust how they are invoked, rather than leaving me to guess about the latter. ;) [[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.49|162.158.74.49]] 19:04, 17 January 2025 (UTC)
:PS: Yes, I have just checked, and, yes you've added (apparently ''after'' I saw and copied the original {{template|ac}} for my own testing and emulating purposes!) the bolding to the aligh-centering template. That part of the mystery is solved! :P [[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.49|162.158.74.49]] 19:10, 17 January 2025 (UTC)
:PPS: I know what happened. I copied the (slightly '''formatted''') 'plaintext' as it appeared in the template. If I'd have edited it and copied the wikisource then I'd have grabbed the <nowiki>'''formatted''</nowiki> as you already had it by the time I passed by. Don't mind me, it was just something that made me wonder. Probably moreso than the thing that I was ''actually'' trying to prod and poke and solve! IOW: Ignore me. On this bit, at least! [[Special:Contributions/172.68.205.151|172.68.205.151]] 19:32, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

::I love how interested you are about this! Honestly i'm not really sure what exactly it is you're asking, but you seem very smart so do whatever you want! My only request is that the {{:ac}} thing keeps working as expected, so i don't have to change the table again. I had forgotten about the {{:nw}} thing, you can delete it or change it or do anything else, I don't use it anymore. Feel free to add to the documentation that these are just for 1 table and might break everything if used anywhere else. Or, if they already work everywhere, great! I remember I created them expecting the entire page to be destroyed when used, and being pleasantly surprised when they worked. So yeah go wild! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:19, 17 January 2025 (UTC)
:::I'm not going to make any change without taking time to check your tables and making sure the appropriate change doesn't inflict damage on your attempts to curate the tables you're probably using it for.
:::But, in short, I understand that you're streamlining the (often longwinded) style="" statements, an admirble task. In the structure of "| cell || another cell || etc", you're doing something to save from having to do cumbersome "| cell || style="this-style: that; that-style: that; the-other-style: the.other" | another cell || etc", all of which makes editing 'difficult'. (I tend to do such things in Notepad, or whatever separate text editor I have, which lets me add temporary whitespace and use with no-wrap on the markup while I'm working on it, rather than in this textbox editor.)
::: But the single-pipe that formats the cell isn't a ''great'' difficulty to maintain (indeed, it is useful to line up). As such I'd suggest "| cell || <nowiki>{{??}}</nowiki> | another cell || etc" would be as good. i.e. leave the pipe (intended for the table-cell) out of the template. For the no-wrap version, that's easy enough. Though I do understand that you want to put bold-format about the cell contents, so that's why you give it as a param and explicitly bold the Param1 as you pass it back out.
::: Maybe the solution to ''that'' is to also add (to the style, along with the text-align:center) the "font-weight: bold" doublet. Then "... || <format(s), as templates and/or raw> | Cell Text || ..." doesn't ''need'' to 'enclose' the Cell Text in any way.
::: But making the change from something that expects to transclude the <u>range of the template</u> "... || <u>format | Cell Text</u> || ..." to "... || <u>format</u> | Cell Text || ..." obviously requires that each and every table-cell item that uses "... || <nowiki>{{template|Cell Text}}</nowiki> || ..." to be converted to "... || <nowiki>{{template}}</nowiki> | Cell Text || ...", or... it'll definitely not work as it was originally set.
::: Anyway, that's just my own vision of how you can do what you seem to have wanted to, without introducing more complications. As the cell-formatting gladly accepts multiple statements of the form style="..." (it adds <code>style="..." style="..." style="..."</code> together, much as <code>style="...; ...; ..."</code> does), an editor now has complete freedom to compound the two format-templates you created. And any additional ones that might be useful. Such ones to usefully colour cell backgrounds as red/yellow/green (for use on the various Confusion Tables), something that I sometimes take a couple of goes to do... not least because I habitually spell 'color' as 'colour'..! ;)
::: ...but that's just to explain so that (should you/anybody else wish to follow my own instincts on the matter), you have some decent idea of what I'm getting at. There are probably other ways of doing it. Templates can be made to detect and extract pipes, so that "... || <u><nowiki>{{template1|{{templete2|Cell Text}}}}</nowiki></u> || ..." ''or'' "... || <u><nowiki>{{template2|{{templete1|Cell Text}}}}</nowiki></u> || ..." would equally produce "... || <u>templateOneOrTwoFormat templateTwoOrOneFormat | Cell Text</u> || ...", but that would take a degree of of unwieldy parameter-processing functions (that I'd have to work out, probably would involve some subst-function, but might depend upon what's available in the installed mediawiki version). I just think you could avoid all that trouble! [[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.118|162.158.74.118]] 22:51, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

:::Forgot to say, that for what you want to use it for, there's ''another'' way:
{| class="wikitable" style="margin:auto"
|+ Example 2
|-
! Number (Centered) !! Foo !! Bar (Centered) !! Baz
|-
! 1
| Normal text of a normal style
! Some text of whatever size (centered)
| More normal text of a normal style
|-
! 2
| Normal text of a normal style
! Some text of whatever size (also centered, though not so obviously so)
| More normal text of a normal style
|}
:::... This is only possible by newlining each new cell, in the example (you can't do "! cell || cell !! cell || cell", you have to line-break it as you change from "!"-/"|"-starting cell-groups), but it isn't really so great a loss to do so.
:::The "wikitable" class gives these 'header cells' a different background too, but (if you really don't like that) it that can be adjusted in various other ways (including with scope="col", I think), or you can leave the wikitable class off (it centres and bolds, but doesn't give cell-borders) and re-add the whole-table bordering style that this now leaves out. But you really don't want me listing ''every'' idea I had, just this one was the other (template-free) option to enforcing centre-aligning bold text on ''certain'' cells. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.119|162.158.74.119]] 23:09, 17 January 2025 (UTC)

::::Huh, I was actually thinking of doing the opposite of what you're suggesting: include even more pipes inside the template so the editor is cleaner and easier to use. (UPDATE: this probably worse than the other option you gave at the end, see below). So instead of this:

|-
<nowiki>| {{ac|4}} || </nowiki>

::::You would just use this:

|-
<nowiki>{{ac|4}}</nowiki>

::::And it would contain all the pipes needed. I guess then we would have to update the documentation to point out that this template's use case is extremely narrow. Also, if you want to see how it is currently used, the table is on my user page! That's the only place where it's used

::::Since you seem very interested in templates, What do you think of the idea of a creating a template like these:

<nowiki>{{yt|YTNUMBER (1, 2, 3, etc)|YTLINK|VIDEOTITLE (optional)}}</nowiki>

::::It would be used in the column that we still need to create. It would also colour the cell in '''red'''. I was also thinking of doing a similar thing for the What If? books:

<nowiki>{{bk|WHICH-BOOK|CHAPTER-NUMBER|CHAPTER-TITLE (if different)}}</nowiki>

::::For example, it would look like this: (This one would also colour the cell based on the book, e.g., green for WI?1, yellow for WI?2, blue for WI10th ed.)

<nowiki>{{book|2|69|Jellyfish}}</nowiki>

What If? 2, chapter '''69: Jellyfish'''

::::Would you be able to create something like this? I know nothing about templates, and i doubt I'll be able to ask chatgpt to do everything for me correctly. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 07:16, 18 January 2025 (UTC)

:::::> Forgot to say, that for what you want to use it for, there's ''another'' way:
:::::Oh, i think i had forgotten to read this part!! This seems very interesting! I should try that, since it seems much simpler. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:10, 18 January 2025 (UTC)

:::::'''Update:''' {{Done}} I applied your suggestion, now the numbers are in their own row:
|-
!1
| The rest of the table
--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:33, 18 January 2025 (UTC)

== What If Chapters ==
Hey FaviFake, there are some What If? Chapters that aren’t included in the blog. Are we going to add them to the table? '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 17:41, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

:Great timing! You sent me this message while i was in the process of replying to the question. I'm not good at prioritising, I should've definitely responded before doing other edits. Check out my <s>list of questions for y'all</s> reply above! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:10, 22 January 2025 (UTC)

== YouTube template ==
Hey FaviFake, on the <code><nowiki>{{yt}}</nowiki></code> template, you asked for help on fixing the code of the template. What help do you need to “improve” it? I’m willing to help now that I’m not sick, as I was last week. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 18:35, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

:Thank you! Glad to hear you're healthy. That message was mostly a joke, but it is in fact barely held together. (Try modifying the hyperlink that's displayed when a title isn't provided, somehow what you add gets duplicated??) If you have the time and know how to make it more reliable and easily editable in the future, please do! I am honstly scared to touch it fearing it might explode.

:Buuut, to be fair there is one template that i desperately needed help with, and that is [[:Template:book]]. I wasted a ton of time to try to get it to change the cell background, and it never worked, so i decided to create [[Template:book1]], [[Template:book2]], [[Template:book3]], [[Template:book4]], and these do work beaytifully, but are harder to edit in bulk. (I still have profound hatred towards [[Template:book]]...). If you actually manage to do what i wanted (which i'm not sure is even clear after the all the mess i've made... ask me if you can't figure it out!), I would be very grateful. PS. I'm not sure if i should warn you, given my very low ability to create templates, but it's definitely not easy, imo.

:I'm not sure how skilled you are at template editing, so if you want, you can absolutely continue uploading the What If? thumbnails like you did a few days ago! I just added [[User:FaviFake|a new batch of articles]] (about 60) thanks to some annoyingly complex jailbreaking of Google's NotebookLM. The new table of course includes the quick 100px link to upload a file. Again, thanks for reaching out! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:04, 19 January 2025 (UTC)

::The YT link appears to be going to <nowiki>[[whatever the name of the YouTube video is called]]</nowiki> and not acting as a [youtube.com filler thingy] linking to a YouTube video. I’m going to hit the books on template writing and try to see if I can do anything about it. Cheers! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 03:11, 21 January 2025 (UTC)

:::Oh great, that's broken too. I didn't even realise it. Thanks!--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 04:57, 21 January 2025 (UTC)

:Partly because you've removed the bit about how to better sort the book-column elements, but are using the same trick in the youtube-column, and partly because it's easier (more on that in a moment), I've just modified the {{template|yt}} to give it the sort value (of article number) directly. Have not removed the expression test to make "6th video ..." into "06th video ...", for sorting purposes, but I feel confident that you ''can'' do that (and remove the comment about making it give "006th video ...", in future, should that become necessary) if you now so wish.

:For the books, I was thinking that if, instead of <code>="<nowiki>{{{1|0}}}</nowiki>"</code>, you could maybe use <code>="<nowiki>{{#expr:10000+{{{1|0}}}}}</nowiki>"</code> for ''What If?'' (in {{template|book1}}) and <code>="<nowiki>{{#expr:20000+{{{1|0}}}}}</nowiki>"</code> for ''What If? 2'' (in {{template|book2}}), to let it sort by book ''and then'' chapter within book...

:For ''What If? 10th Anniversary Edition'' ({{template|book3}}), I was thinking if you could make the added-to number 11000. Though anything from above 10000+<last chapter number> and below 20000-<last chapter number> would do (and 15000 would work), it leaves room to make any appearance of the 15th anniversary, 20th anniversary, 42nd anniversary, ..., 95th anniversary be able to use the mnemonic offsets of 11500+, 12000+, 14200+, ..., 19500+.. ;) Obviously, it would need revamping if there becomes a centenary edition of Book 1 (or any version of it ever gets ''so many'' "bonus chapters" that it breaks out of its own sequence into the next extant anniversary edition. But you'd need to start adding 100 newly-numbered chapters ''per year'' to do that, so probably not likely. But, right now, the sorting on the "Exclusive to ''What If? 10th Anniversary Edition''" line sorts ''before'' the "NNth chapter of ''What If?''" lines. The above should fix that...

:And the format can be used for other (future?) books and their (possible) reissues: For ''What If? '''N''''', reissued '''YY''' years after the original, that's the number "NYY00", to which you add the chapter number. Fairly futureproofed, but if Randall ''ever'' publishes anything that makes you need to make the offset "NNYYY000" (e.g. for the quarter-of-a-millenium reissue of ''What If? 15'', having a total of 512 chapters being 15250000+[1..512]) then I reckon the requisite changes will be easy enough to handle as and when, swapping in the expanded offset. And... hey... if they're still being written, ''and'' published, then I can only hope I'm still around to be able to add that edition to my bookshelf!

:You could even redo the {{template|book}} idea (parameters of ...|book=#|chapter=#|optional:edition=#?|...) to only ever need to maintain the one source with ''all'' this flexibility. You've already got experience (by the 1st/2nd/3rd/Nth code) with what's needed to translate Book Number(+Edition Number, if applicable) into unique background colour codes.

:The big problem, though, is still the non-numeric chapter 'numbers' in ''WI?2''. I have two (or three) different thoughts about that.

:*For only the numeric bits (currently, in the test for less-than-10, etc; in the above for within the <code>data-sort-value="..."</code>) you might want to switch <code><nowiki>{{{1|0}}}</nowiki></code> with <code><nowiki>{{#if:{{#ifexpr:{{{1|0}}}}}|99|{{{1|0}}}}}{{{1|0}}}</nowiki></code>... This should test the param1 value for being a valid value (or missing, when you already make it zero... though not sure for what circumstance you should consider it validly missing) and using it if it is so, or else using the value "99" (or you could have "0", or "0.5", or whatever floats your boat). Then at least you'd get ''a'' value (that doesn't cause errors), though it probably wouldn't be sorted very precisely (though appear just after/before all other chapters of the book).

:*The other idea is to use <code><nowiki>{{{effectiveChapter|{{{1|0}}}}}}</nowiki></code>, then you can append a parameter of <code>...|effectiveChapter=11.5}}</code> to a non-numeric one sitting between actual chapters 11 and 12 (I haven't checked if that's an actual example, but imagine it is...). Also, for multiple items on page-chapter, you could even have =11.51, =11.52, =11.53, etc, to retain order within the book and ''upon the page''... (You could also give effectiveChapter as "NYYCC(.optional)" format, direct, for ''all'' what if? Numbers, YYearly-editions and CChapters (with possibly sub-positions), come to that, but I don't see that as any simpler a solution as building it in.)

:*The third option would be to use (for hidden sorting-only purpose, mostly) a value of P(.optionalDecimal) either as another numeric parameter or a named one, with P as ''page number'', not chapter number. But, given how hardback vs. paperback (or just another imprint, not necessarily even a Anniversary redo, but I've got the UK edition with an additional UK foreword) ''might'' effect page numbers and/or where end-of-pages interupts any given chapter internals, it's possible that this is not consistent enough. But food for thought, maybe. Only needs to be definitively done once (or thoroughly checked and shuffled along as nevessary if redone to include other changes that require consistency).

:Any of that make sense? Hopefully I've at least given you enough examples to ponder, where not immediately obvious. I'd ''really'' rather not change all your hard work just for the sake of a minor cosmetic change with a possibly major set of retouches, which is one of the reasons why I thought I'd do just the basic Youtube 'sort assisting' bit and let those of you who have already had so much 'fun' (tweaking the table formats) decide if and how you make full use of it. Assuming it isn't (differently) broken, for whatever reason may crop up, it shouldn't be a problem if you do nothing at all more with it (either in the {{template|yt}} or {{template|book#}}s). [[Special:Contributions/172.71.241.26|172.71.241.26]] 14:38, 28 January 2025 (UTC)

*Thank you so much! Would you mind if I moved your message to [[Talk:What If? chapters]], to group everything regarding the index in one place?  Anyways:
*I did the thing on the yt and {{template|blog}} one and it works!

For the books, I was thinking that if, instead of <code>="<nowiki>{{{1|0}}}</nowiki>"</code>, you could maybe use <code>="<nowiki>{{#expr:10000+{{{1|0}}}}}</nowiki>"</code> for ''What If?'' (in {{template|book1}}) and <code>="<nowiki>{{#expr:20000+{{{1|0}}}}}</nowiki>"</code> for ''What If? 2'' (in {{template|book2}}), to let it sort by book ''and then'' chapter within book...
*Done! Thanks! For ({{template|book3}}) i used 30000 to have the chapter in chronological order.

You could even redo the {{template|book}} idea
*Sorry but I'm not touching that... ''thing'' anymore. That template traumatized me (jk! if you want to try fixing it i'd be very happy)

For only the numeric bits (currently, in the test for less-than-10, etc; in the above for within the <code>data-sort-value="..."</code>) you might want to switch <code><nowiki>{{{1|0}}}</nowiki></code> with <code><nowiki>{{#if:{{#ifexpr:{{{1|0}}}}}|99|{{{1|0}}}}}{{{1|0}}}</nowiki></code>... This should test the param1 value for being a valid value (or missing, when you already make it zero... though not sure for what circumstance you should consider it validly missing)
*I'm not sure why that's needed (and also how to actually implement it). What happens if the value is invalid? it seems to work. Or is it required for the other improvements you suggested?

The other idea is...
The third option would be...
*Yeah this seems pretty hard to solve easily (which is why i'd love it if you did it!). I guess it'll stay slightly broken until it becomes a bigger issue. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:54, 28 January 2025 (UTC)

::It seems like you just forgot to escape pipe characters in the [[Template:book|book template]] in the table within the switch statement, so it just interpreted the non-formatting statements to be a case grouped with the next 'actual' case [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 07:23, 29 January 2025 (UTC)
::BTW I fixed the book template. It should now appear the same as the other templates, and even work with the youtube template [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 09:13, 29 January 2025 (UTC)

:::OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! IT ACTUALLY WORKS! What! How! Why!
:::Thanks so much for fixing the template! I can't describe how glad I am to see it working as (and even better than) I wanted. My life is finally complete. I have switched to using your template in the index.
:::The reason there was a YT link in one of the {{template|book}} documentation examples is because I was going insane and likely pasted it there by accident. From what I can tell, you seem to have set up {{template|book}} so well that {{template|book}} accepts a YouTube link as input, while the {{template|yt}} template it's based on doesn't if used by itself (requires only the ID). I love this! Since we're gonna have many YT videos to add, it's great to have a much simpler option which doesn't require extracting the ID of the video. Is there a way you could maybe incorporate this improvement into {{template|yt}} itself? Or maybe you're 10 steps ahead of me and you've already done it (which wouldn't surprise me given the amount of wizardry you used on these bad boys!), and I just didn't notice. Please let me know! And again, thank you so much!!! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:56, 29 January 2025 (UTC)
:::Also, since you've already rendered 4 templates useless thanks to your improvements, why not also add {{template|yt}} to the list of pages to delete, by incorporating it into {{template|book}}? This, unlike {{template|book}}, is absolutely not needed, and I also have no idea if it's as easy as a simple copy-and-paste, or if it requires more work. If it's the latter, please don't do it if you don't want to! I'm just throwing ideas around! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:04, 29 January 2025 (UTC)

That IP, here. I (think) I fixed the sorting ''and'' error-fallback issues. I think (without trying to roll back to how you had it) you 'broke the sort' by putting in line-feeds (maybe double-ones), that messed up the table/cell handling. Then you broke the handling by commenting out too much (you needed to "< ! - -" and "- - >", without spaces, without crossing the quotes and |ing boundaries in data-sort-value="..." style="..." and the 'release', by pipe symbol, to cell-contents).
<br/>Recommented for it to work normally, first without the new 'sort assistance' and then with again. Had a look at the error-catcher (went down a blind alley, at first) and made it an explicit "catch all other inputs" for the errororing display, which I formatted in a more obvious manner ''and'' forced to sort to the start. (Well, almost the start. It puts empty cells with no sorting 'ahead' of even the -999 value I made it give any error-caught cells.)
<br/>If it were me, I'd be happy to have {{template|yt}} entirely separate from the {{template|book}} handling. It is mnemonically confusing and adds needless (and possibly error-prone) "if we have far too many params for Book template, feed it all into the Youtube template". Unless you're folding the ''whole'' Youtube template into the body of the Book one (even more work to maintain/debug), it's just adding complication for both server and editors who feel forced to use it. The beauty of the monolithic Book template is that (otherwise identical) "Book N, chapter C, optional new title T" information is trivially similar between different Ns. But it's not my project.
<br/>I'll have a dig about in maybe how to have a table sort "valueless" cells (in reality the empty value of cell absolutely without anything in it) beyond the sort-valued ones. The 'easiest' means I could imagine is to accept <nowiki>{{book|0}}</nowiki>, needing no further params, to create a <code>data-sort-value="999999" |''<blank>''</code> cell-definition, and have every book-column cell without a book-reference explicitly use that (ditto for <nowiki>{{yt|0}}</nowiki> to have the same pre-trap to it). But seems wasteful. A template <nowiki>{{empty}}, or even something like {{e}},</nowiki> (without checking if either of those are free names) could also just give us this behaviour straight off, of course. It's potentially a lot of fuss to make consistent and flexible enough, either way.
<br/>But what I already did probably also needs to be checked for more edge-conditions... I may still have to tweak things when I have a better chance of catching errors (very difficult, on a tablet), and quicker. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.162.196|172.70.162.196]] 21:32, 29 January 2025 (UTC)
:I also think that the book template shouldn't be used for the videos, on the basis that youtube is not a book.
:for the default cell, it would probably take no arguments (i.e. just <nowiki>{{yt}}</nowiki>), and it would also probably be it's own template rather than implemented on each template. However, I have done some digging, and empty cells (cells with no sort value) are given a value of "-infinity", so they sort as the absolute minimum no matter what sort method is used (which means always at the top when sorting ascending). I have been looking to find a way to make a row always sort to the bottom regardless of sort order if the column that is sorted has an empty/valueless cell at that row, but if it exists, it is not documented.
:Interestingly, it is possible to sort by many columns at once by shift-clicking the second column after sorting the first column, and the rows will be sorted within the first sorting. it might be useful for sorting by chapter within each book [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 06:51, 30 January 2025 (UTC)
::Yes, a book (or youtube) template could default to whatever seems suitable as sort-value without params, but it might be more obvious if explicitly book(/video) zero. Or caught by <nowiki>{{book|nobook=yet}}</nowiki>, or whatever. I'm trying to think what looks least confusing to future editors (those expanding/editing the table, and/or template(s)), but conflicted about what to anticipate.
::I had indeed been looking to see if the -infinity thing could be overriden by a column header defined <code>blank-sort-value="999999"</code> sort of thing. If nothing else, you'd expect there to be a perceived need to sort a range of cells so that explicit negative and explicit positive contents, either by actual cell value or data-sort-value, to sit either side of blank cells... Not ''all'' the time, as sorting to show blanks ''separate'' from filled rows with actual zeroes is also useful, but it seems to useful not to have been suggested as a configurable change.
::The booknumber*A_LARGE_NUMBER offset to the chapter number is probably one of the most useful ways to sort by (primarily) book, then chapter, as it takes just one click. (I believe clicking the secondary and then clicking the primary does the same job as clicking the primary and shift-clicking the primary.) I see so little use to doing a primary sort by chapter (with or without secondary sorting by books, or any other column's detail), to interleave all chapter 1s and so on, that having a "book #" column and a "chapter(/page) #" column (two cells in sequence easily created by the book template, and could also handle the double-blank needed by book=none implementation, if we went that route) would be just complicating matters in an unnecessary manner. (As opposed to how we've complicated matters in a 'necessary' one!)
::Good catch on bringing the BOOK+CHAPTER sort value out of the #switch, BTW, as I was debating how much of the switch-statement I could treat as generic and not need repeating. (My original idea for the 10th Anniversary version of Book 1 to be effectively "Book1.1" made me still want to option of overriding the N*10000 as being 3=>11000 instead of =>30000, but that could ''still'' be implemented by a bit of "(if N=3, 1.1, else N) times 10000" pre-logic, ''or'' by handling <nowiki>{{book|1.10|...}} instead of {{book|3|...}}</nowiki>. Anyway, not important, either way.)
::...all this is why I left Favi (and you/others) get on with the original restructuring effort without jumping in (despite having two of the three books, and having seen all the youtubes). I had plenty of ideas of what to do, but did not want to restructure anything from what seemed to be a happy little project with its own momentum and targets. I finally gave in when I noticed an impasse being hit, with errors and confusion, to which I since ''hope'' I have provided a net reduction in both. Though it's only the first of these about which I'm fairly confident. ;) Anyway, perhaps I'm sliding back to my position on the sidelines, now... [[Special:Contributions/172.70.91.245|172.70.91.245]] 11:20, 30 January 2025 (UTC)
:::These comments are great and extremely detailed, thank you! Thanks to your efforts I was able to retire these templates: book1, book2, book3, book4, and yt, so now we only have the huge {{template|book}} template and {{template|blog}}. I kinda agree with IP that it might not be future-proof, but I don't really see a reason to believe we'll add 2 more parameters to the book-specific columns. And even then, it's not that hard to update the template. But please do let me know if you can think of other issues with the current implementation! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:50, 30 January 2025 (UTC)
----
I've added a minor feature to the template so that we can see which short video one is. For example, the "everyone jump" short is the 17th one posted, so it now displays on the table as "17th Short video, on 2025‑11‑25: What if everyone on Earth was in the same place and jumped at the same time?". Hope it helps! [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#5CA7CF">tor</span><span style="color:#F08DB0">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#9E9E9E">talk </span><span style="color:#F08DB0">to </span><span style="color:#5CA7CF">me!</span>]]</span></sup> 17:38, 11 February 2026 (UTC)
:Thanks! Initially i didn't add it to allow column sorting to work only for videos, but now that there are many shorts the number is definitely neeeded somehwere :) [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:39, 13 February 2026 (UTC)

== tldr ==

hey favifake! i just came back from a 5 day yosemite trip, that’s why i have been awol for that time. could you please really quick give me a tldr of what has been going on in the past couple days? i see that we finished the index, but i’m just wondering if there’s anything else. thanks! '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 02:52, 1 February 2025 (UTC)
:Welcome back! We now only use the {{template|book}} and {{template|blog}} templates, all the others have been merged into {{template|book}} by the incredible [[User:Firestar233]], the templates are much more solid, they also added all the questions and almost all the what if? 2-exclusive chapters. So now we're only missing the questions from the first book and an explanation for the third's bonus chapter (which you own!). I don't have much time, but you can look at the history of the templates and the main what if chapters page, and also this talk section. There's also a to-do list above the index! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:32, 1 February 2025 (UTC)
::ok, great! i'll try to work on the chapter explainations once i find the time '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 21:04, 1 February 2025 (UTC)
:::Amazing! Thanks for your help. If you're interested, I've just added a simple (yet boring) task:
:::*''"Need to add the name(s) of the readers who asked each questions. It's easy! The instructions are in the ''[[What If? chapters#Editors|Editors section]]''!"''
:::If you have time, the names are missing for some book-exclusive articles and the blog articles. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:59, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

== Table for smaller screens ==
Do we think we should list out who asked each question in the table? [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 03:09, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

:If so (and I'm not sure it's necessary), please not as an extra column. Already it's squeezing what's there down, something chronic. At least on my current screen, right now.
:*The thumbnail column can't get smaller (unless we use smaller/downscaled thukbnails, of course, but there's a limit to that)
:*The title column (of the first non-hdader is "Relatacistic(Newline)Baseball".
:*The "Reader's(Newline)question" column goes "(quote)What would(Newline)happen if you(Newline)(...etc)".
:*The "Randall's answer" column is positively spacious (no doubt forced to be so by the "Too short!" infoboxes), letting it read "The ball would create plasma and(Newline)reach home plate by about 70(Newline)(...etc)".
:*The three columns for Blog/Book/Vid couldn't be narrower and make sense.
:If the questioner is to be asked, set it after the question (same cell, maybe horizontal rule).
:In fact, what do you think of the following layout modification?
{| class="sortable wikitable"
!Title
!Question / Answer
!Blog
!Books
!YouTube
|-
|'''{{what if|1|Relativistic Baseball}}'''
[[File:Relativistic Baseball.png|100px]]
|''"What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% the speed of light?"''
<div align="right">Ellen McManis</div>
----
The ball would create plasma and reach home plate by about 70 nanoseconds. The result would be some kind of nuclear explosion, destroying everything about a mile from the field. A ruling of "{{w|hit by pitch}}" could be interpreted in this situation.
|{{blog|1|2012|07|10}}
|{{book|1|2}}
|{{book|5|2024|02|06|3EI08o-IGYk|What if you threw a baseball at nearly light speed?}}
|-
|'''{{what if|2|SAT Guessing}}'''
[[File:SAT Guessing.png|100px]]
|''"What if everyone who took the SAT guessed on every multiple-choice question? How many perfect scores would there be?"''
<div align="right">Rob Balder</div>
----
No one would get a perfect score. The odds of guessing correctly on every question would be less than the odds of every ex-living president at that time and the main cast of [[:Category:Firefly|Firefly]] getting struck by lightning on the same day.
|{{blog|2|2012|07|10|7d early}}
|{{book|1|66}}
|
|}
:Saves trouble of having emphatically unsortable columns, this way, being mere continuations of the cell contents we ''do'' want to sort. Assuming we don't decide we want to sort by "Firstname(s) Lastname" (or "Lastname, Firstname(s)"), as well as by sorting by "What would..." / "What if..." / "How much..." / "Is there..."ness, etc. But that's another step with another answer to it. (e.g. a "By" column with data-sort-value="Lastname, Firstname(s)" defined but ''no visible content''... It'll be as minimally thin as "By" and the sort-glyph allows, only minimally squeezing the other columns. ...if that's more desirous than merely 'data-sort-value'ing the Question(/Name)/Answer field by name (whatever format), and finding little real reason to sort the "How"s from the "What"s from the "Is"s. But that's something that deserves more thought!)
:But what I ''do'' highly suggest (at least add the "Who" after the "Question", same cell, and looks nice with right-align; on top of that, cell-mergering like this, ''probably'' with the horizontal rule markup in the Q&A divide) looks good to me.
:"Relativistic Baseball"(noNewline!) and "(quote)What would happen if you tried to hit a   (Newline, etc...)" is how the example table pans out in Preview, which is an improvement for readability.
:I won't pre-emptimptively assume you're ok with this plan, but (if it seems the idea is liked/not disliked), when I have the time to do it I could blitz this (or any other consensus change of similar radicality, that gets proposed instead) later on (at least 12 hours from now, maybe a full day...). I'll do what I can to fill (or visibly format, if already there) such authors as I'm not left totally stumped about for whatever nazcent reason. Sound good to y'all? ;) [[Special:Contributions/141.101.98.190|141.101.98.190]] 05:00, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

::Thanks for your suggestions! These are my thoughts:
Do we think we should list out who asked each question in the table?
::Yes! I thought about doing this after you commented each reader after the question, but didn't have the time. The ay you went about adding them makes it very easy to create a "find-and-replace" to do it for all cells at once.This is how I'd do it:
:: <nowiki>''"Question?"''</nowiki>
:: <nowiki><div align="right">—Rob Balder</div></nowiki>

In fact, what do you think of the following layout modification?
[...] cell-mergering like this, ''probably'' with the horizontal rule markup in the Q&A divide) looks good to me.
::I don't really like it and I don't think it's needed, mainly because it only looks good on a small screen. Meanwhile, on a normal-sized desk monitor, it makes the table '''almost twice as tall''' on my end. I don't think we should optimise for smaller screens and disregard other users with a larger screen real estate. If you find any other way to improve the table on both screen sizes, please do let us know!
(e.g. a "By" column with data-sort-value="Lastname, Firstname(s)" defined but ''no visible content''... It'll be as minimally thin as "By" and the sort-glyph allows, only minimally squeezing the other columns.
::I don't really like this idea, seems confusing for the end user (why is there an empty column?), doesn't add so much value, and needs to be maintained. If someone wants to sort by reader alphabetically, they'll likely find a way to isolate the '''<code><nowiki><div align="right">—Rob Balder</div></nowiki></code>''' part.
But what I ''do'' highly suggest (at least add the "Who" after the "Question", same cell, and looks nice with right-align [...]
::Love that! See above.
::--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 09:01, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

::I formatted them! All the ones that were added as comments in the table are now visible. I also added this to-do, mainly for blog posts:
::*Need to add the name(s) of the readers who asked each questions. It's easy! The instructions are in the ''[[What If? chapters#Editors|Editors section]]''!
::--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 10:57, 2 February 2025 (UTC)
:::Regarding "...on a normal-sized desk monitor, it makes the table '''almost twice as tall''' on my end." my display (non-desktop) has ultra-wide aspect ratio (when landscape; I rarely use portrait for browsing because then web-pages are scaled to unreadable levels).
:::With side-by-side Q and A columns, the "Too small" warning box dictates the minimum width of the Answer column, making the Question column even more narrow (when you take the minimum width of the thumbnail out of the horizontal space, then the title and the three "occurance" columns fight for what remains) than it might otherwise need to be. (If/when we remove ''all'' these hints to edit longer answer-'summaries', the table will doubtless realign its contents to a more equitable share of width between columns.)
:::Most often, this still results in (non-short) "Answer" columns being longer than they need to be, and forcing the whole row to be vertically wasteful. An opposite case (such as replicated below) does it with the Question having to have excessive linefeeds, being less readable (needs scrolling to read it all) and leaving a vast desert of blankness in the cell to its immediate right.
:::Isolating just the Q and A columns (to remove other confounding factors, for most displays except maybe phones-in-portrait - which is already an abominable mode and I find most websites look ''far'' more unreadable in ultra-tall-portrait orientation, so I generally avoid doing that on my tablet) and manually adding the line-breaks I see, you get:
{| class="sortable wikitable"
|"When my wife<br/>and I started<br/>dating she<br/>invited me over<br/>for dinner at one<br/>time. Her<br/>kitchen had<br/>something<br/>called Bauhaus<br/>chairs, which are<br/>full of holes,<br/>approx 5-6<br/>millimeters in<br/>diameter in both<br/>back and seat.<br/>During this<br/>lovely dinner I<br/>was forced to<br/>liberate a small<br/>portion of wind<br/>and was relieved<br/>that I managed<br/>to do so very<br/>discretely. Only<br/>to find that the<br/>chair I sat on<br/>converted the<br/>successful<br/>silence into a<br/>perfect, and<br/>loud, flute note.<br/>We were both<br/>(luckily) amazed<br/>and surprised<br/>and I have often<br/>wondered what<br/>the odds are for<br/>something like<br/>that happening.<br/>We kept the<br/>chairs for five<br/>years but<br/>despite laborious<br/>attempts it<br/>couldn't be<br/>reproduced."
|This... isn’t actually a question, but<br/>thank you for sharing!
|}
:::Integrating the row into the above-suggested format of table, we get (showing just that single combined Q+A cell, minus any "by"-line), the following:
{| class="sortable wikitable"
|"When my wife and I started dating she invited<br/>me over for dinner at one time. Her kitchen had<br/>something called Bauhaus chairs, which are full<br/>of holes, approx 5-6 millimeters in<br/>diameter in both back and seat. During this lovely dinner I<br/>was forced to liberate a small portion of wind<br/>and was relieved that I managed to do so very<br/>discretely. Only to find that the chair I sat on<br/>converted the successful silence into a perfect,<br/>and loud, flute note. We were both (luckily)<br/>amazed and surprised and I have often<br/>wondered what the odds are for something like<br/>that happening. We kept the chairs for five<br/>years but despite laborious attempts it couldn't be reproduced."
----
This... isn’t actually a question, but thank you<br/>for sharing!
|}
:::Yes, the non-Q&A cells (which I've left out, just there) are still comparatively empty (especially as "Relativistic Baseball" isn't forced into two lines, and even the final three columns don't need quite as many linefeeds between them ...you could probably narrow them further by forcing some linebreaks back into them, giving even more width to Q+A column), but they're actually often ''less'' empty because they aren't as artifically tall as a function of =max(height(question),height(answer)), instead being =height(wider(question+answer)). The conversion to not force a short question to inhabit a desolately empty cell as long as narrowly squashed answer, ''and'' a short answer to be as long as an even more narrowly squashed question, seems to be more wasteful of space than to give combined Q&A far more width and let it be ''exactly'' as long as it needs to be for both to fill it (being the crux of the row, the rest being 'annotations' to the paragraphed question/answer interplay).
:::Though I'm not next to my own desktop display, right now, I can tell you that the space-wasting I'm showing is notable (though not quite so egregious) there, too, and I had already thought to try out (at least for a Preview) a Q+A column.
:::I wasn't, at that time, even thinking of thumbnail+title columns merging (which would help even more), but I'm sorely tempted now. Whether or not Q+A merging is accepted by the wider set of editors. Merging title+thumbnail ''could'' trivially let the Q-column expand maybe to double its current width, depending upon the other dynamics involved in apportioning rendered width and height. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.90.9|172.70.90.9]] 13:00, 2 February 2025 (UTC)

:::Ok, for reference: The desktop machine has the following line-feeds for the above example, as ''currently'' shown in the Thumbnail|Title|Question|Answer|... format:
{| class="sortable wikitable"
|"When my wife and I started dating she invited me<br/>over for dinner at one time. Her kitchen<br/>had something called Bauhaus chairs, which are full of<br/>holes, approx 5-6 millimeters in diameter in both<br/>back and seat. During this lovely dinner I was forced<br/>to liberate a small portion of wind and was relieved<br/>that I managed to do so very discretely. Only to find<br/>that the chair I sat on converted the successful<br/>silence into a perfect, and loud, flute note. We were<br/>both (luckily) amazed and surprised and I have often<br/>wondered what the odds are for something like that<br/>happening. We kept the chairs for five years but<br/>despite laborious attempts it couldn't be<br/>reproduced."
|This... isn’t actually a question, but thank you for sharing!(Single line!)
|}
:::Testing the above-suggested format of table, we get:
{| class="sortable wikitable"
|"When my wife and I started dating she invited me over for dinner at one time. Her kitchen had something called Bauhaus<br/>chairs, which are full of holes, approx 5-6 millimeters in diameter in both back and seat. During this lovely dinner I was<br/>forced to liberate a small portion of wind and was relieved that I managed to do so very discretely. Only to find that the<br/>chair I sat on converted the successful silence into a perfect, and loud, flute note. We were both (luckily) amazed and surprised<br/>and I have often wondered what the odds are for something like that happening. We kept the chairs for five years but<br/>despite laborious attempts it couldn't be reproduced."
----
This... isn’t actually a question, but thank you for sharing!
|}
:::Again, produces shorter (and more readable?) rows. In this particularly extreme example, at least. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.74.49|162.158.74.49]] 14:25, 2 February 2025 (UTC)
::::Thanks for your answer, these are my thoughts:
the "Too small" warning box dictates the minimum width of the Answer column, making the Question column even more narrow [...] than it might otherwise need to be
::::*I hadn't thought of that, but still: if the issue is mainly caused by these notices, it's very easy to replace them with something else that doesn't force the column to be too wide.
I generally avoid doing that on my tablet
::::*Oh, you're still the same IP as before! Hey there! My point ''wasn't'' that your idea wouldn't benefit small-sized screens like tablets (because it does, as you proved!), but that we should mainly focus on desktop users, which is how most readers that aren't on their phones will use the index. I don't like the idea of making the experience worse for everyone except tablet users (and phone users, but i can't imagine someone browsing such a huge index on their phones, so i don't think we should consider them). I'd love it you could improve the experience for both types of devices!
"When my wife and I started dating she invited me over for dinner at one time. Her kitchen
::::*I think that's a bad example because the question is 4x the normal question length and there is no answer. I don't think we'd want to optimise the index so that that specific article looks better but most other articles don't.
::::*I think the perfect example of how it will one day look is article 2, with the question being slightly shorter than the answer, and that difference being balanced by the name of the reader who asked the question:
{| class="sortable wikitable"
!class="unsortable"|Thumbnail
!Title
!Reader's question
!class="unsortable"|Randall's answer
!Blog
!Books
!YouTube
|-
|[[File:SAT Guessing.png|100px]]
|'''{{what if|2|SAT Guessing}}'''
|''"What if everyone who took the SAT guessed on every multiple-choice question? How many perfect scores would there be?"''
<div align="right">—This is a name</div>
|No one would get a perfect score. The odds of guessing correctly on every question would be less than the odds of every ex-living president at that time and the main cast of [[:Category:Firefly|Firefly]] getting struck by lightning on the same day.
|{{blog|2|2012|07|10|7d early}}
|{{book|1|66}}
|{{book|16|2024|09|24|0EytSWiKrFg|What if example?}}
|}
::::*This specific example, which is how most articles do/will look hopefully, is '''~45% shorter''' than [[#Question askers|your example]] and thus wastes much less space on my screen size.
the final three columns don't need quite as many linefeeds between them ...you could probably narrow them further by forcing some linebreaks back into them [...]
::::*If they need linebreaks, doesn't that mean that their column would be the most narrow one? I thought mediawiki balanced the table pretty well.
thumbnail+title columns merging (which would help even more), but I'm sorely tempted now
::::*But I think this idea has the same problem, looking too tall on desktops and beautiful on a tablet. I wouldn't want to ruin the UX of desktop users to favour tablet users, but i'd love a way to improve both!
::::*Also, I'd like to one day make the thumbnail bigger, because currently it's too small in my opinion. But if i increased its size right now, it would force every row to be even taller, which would waste space on desktop (and, of course, save space on small screens, or at least not make that big of a difference). --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:04, 2 February 2025 (UTC)
::::Is there a "mobile" version/url for this site? because there might be a way to make the table try to display a different layout if it's on the mobile url/version or if the screen is too small, but that would require putting complicated expressions in every row and in the header columns. [[User:Firestar233|guess who]] ([[User talk:Firestar233|if you desire conversing]] | [[Special:Contributions/Firestar233|what i have done]]) 20:53, 3 February 2025 (UTC)
:::::Yeah I had thought of doing a similar thing, maybe have two pages with different coding and use complex transclusions to keep the content the same? But I wouldn’t even know where to begin with that. But you're the wiki-editing wizard here. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:50, 4 February 2025 (UTC)

:::::As I predicted, now that most columns are filled, on my screen they're almost the same width! I think it'd be even more balanced if we removed the notices --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:44, 31 March 2025 (UTC)

== adding what if? 10th ann ==

as most of you know, the what if? 10th anniversary edition is basically an updated version of what if?, compete with red annotations and a bonus chapter that i need to get around to explaining. since it has all the original what if? chapters, should we add a red 10th anniversary box under each green what if? box? '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 16:12, 3 February 2025 (UTC)

:Yeah I realized it was just small annotations after i created the template and now I've changed the 10th ann. one to say ''Featured '''exclusively''' on the 3rd ed. etc.'' Not sure if that's enough, could also be much longer since it's only used on 1 row, but we definitely shouldn't add the template to every other article, (would break the style= html tag). Someone should still mention that articles on the first book are all available on the 3rd (and add more info) on both '''[[what if? (blog)]]''' and '''[[What If? 10th Anniversary Edition]]'''.
:Don't worry too much about explaining it, it can just be a couple of sentences. People can watch the video if they want details. Thanks for your work!{{unsigned|FaviFake|09:57, 3 February 2025 (UTC)}} 

:The fact that the 10th Anniversary ed ("book3", in original nomenclature) was basically a bonus-chapter version of the original ("book1"), was behind my suggestion that book|3 should sort-value itself as between book|1 articles and the completely new book|2, but there are severl ways of doing it (including maybe using something akin to {{w|Template:Diagonal split header}} for book|1 (assumed to also be book|3) rendering. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.38.96|162.158.38.96]] 21:08, 3 February 2025 (UTC)

::That's interesting, I didn't know that existed! I wonder if there's a less repetitive and/or space-efficient way of expressing the same message ("this is on both"), but idk. (look, I remembered to sign this time!) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:43, 4 February 2025 (UTC)

::another question: should i be updating the explanations to be accurate as of 2024? many of the red annotations contain corrections or updates. '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:9pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:6pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 16:08, 4 February 2025 (UTC)

That's interesting! I like the idea of adding them, but I can't seem to find a nice way to add them:
*We could add them to the existing explanation, but that would be weird because half of the blog articles, which are public on the site, don't have these additions.
*We could add them to the book column, but it'd likely get too big, and we would need to figure out a way to make the template do that.
*We could create a duplicate row of every red-annotated article, even if they're on the blog, but that would be confusing and might clutter the index.
*We could create a new column, but we already have too many.
*Also, we'd need to figure out how to add them. Do we want to make the text red like in the book? Should we use a new/old template for that?
--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:43, 4 February 2025 (UTC)

== By what measure is anything "too short". ==

I am very close to just removing all the <code><nowiki>{{notice|Too short}}</nowiki></code> additions, on the basis that this seems to be a purely subjective measure. The only reason I haven't is because they'll probably just be added back in again (with no more reasoning than before). But, if anyone wants more information, everyone already knows where they can find the ''full'' text (or narrated video) that gives it, while a summary is a summary. [[Special:Contributions/172.70.85.49|172.70.85.49]] 20:28, 19 March 2025 (UTC)
:The reason I add them is because I'd like people browsing the index to be able to glance at a question and read its summary. I try to check the original article to see if there are any important things we missed and point them out. But if, after reading through an article, you find that our summary is clear and '''fully answers''' the question, you can remove it. I started adding these because some early summaries were way too short, just 5-10 words, and mostly didn't answer the question. For example, if an answer is "We would all die", that doesn't answer the question, but "The radiation from the nuclear bomb would be so pervasive that we would all die in 2 years" does.

:Of course people can just read all ~250 articles, but if someone just wants the answer quickly, we offer that. Please feel free to remove them from answers that are already complete, but not all of them.--[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:48, 20 March 2025 (UTC)

::Reviewing the current first five "Too short" complaints, IMO you cannot get much more fully answered without expanding the "summary" to basically going through the article's in-depth explanation and copying/paraphrasing it. Which seems to me to miss the point.
::Parallel requests for rewording/better phrasing I can understand (if I thought that any change I made in that direction was going to stand when it got "made longer", I might even try to help out in that direction), but I'm still none the wiser why they are too short.
::Answering a question of "How long/heavy/bright/fast is <foo>?" shouldn't need more than a simple "it is <measurement>, given <caveat>", in most cases. Maybe a couple of those if there's different caveats, or add why it would end the world if you even ''had'' such a <foo>. "Could I/we/humanity <bar>?" probably doesn't need much more than "[Yes/No], but <unexpected thing...>" And I'm not sure if it's still there, because I'm not going to recheck it all, but at one point I noted at least one short-question/short-answer that had a longer 'summary' than the answer given.
::I like words. I need to expend effort to not use more of them, myself, and am quite pleased if I ''can'' satisfactorily say what I'm trying to say in a succint manner. (i.e. not like this...) But I'm still none the wiser what (lower) thresholds there are in this situation. I'm going to consider if I can help, here, but not right this moment. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.241.122|172.71.241.122]] 20:29, 20 March 2025 (UTC)

:::Oooh you're the same IP! I didn't recognise you.
Reviewing the current first five "Too short" complaints, IMO you cannot get much more fully answered without expanding the "summary" to basically going through the article's in-depth explanation and copying/paraphrasing it. Which seems to me to miss the point.
:::Sounds good. If the explanation is satisfactory and mentions everything except things like the methodology used and minor "sub-answers", feel free to remove the notices!

"How long/heavy/bright/fast is <foo>?" shouldn't need more than a simple "it is <measurement>, given <caveat>", in most cases. Maybe a couple of those if there's different caveats, or add why it would end the world if you even had such a <foo>.
:::Agreed!

"Could I/we/humanity <bar>?" probably doesn't need much more than "[Yes/No], but <unexpected thing...>"
:::Agree, but usually the entire article revolves around that unexpected thing, so i think we should summarise that too. Agin, feel free to remove the ones you're sure can't be made any longer in a useful way At the start, I added a lot and didn't have time to go read the article for each one! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:56, 21 March 2025 (UTC)

== Alternate universe What-Ifs ==

Should we make the explanation for Alternate universe What-Ifs a separate page? Explaining every section in this article might be too long, and if the other explanations are anything to go by, an explanation that fits would be considered too short. [[Special:Contributions/172.68.174.147|172.68.174.147]] 06:09, 21 March 2025 (UTC)
:I think we should definitely explain it, but maybe it's better if we keep it in the table? Why'd you want to split into another page?
:Also, the short-answer articles aren't too short. If you look at [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/What_If%3F_chapters#:~:text=Short Answer Section II Short%20Answer%20Section%20II], for example, it explanations are very short, and rightfully so. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:49, 21 March 2025 (UTC)

== What about Good Question? ==

There does appear to be a *fourth* "What If?" thing Randall has done that is seemingly only documented at [[New York Times: Good Question]]; the New York Times's [https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd Good Question], which does appear to maybe have some chapter reposts (i.e. Cosmic Road Trip/"How Long Is the Drive to the Edge of the Universe?"). My question is, is this worth documenting on this page in specific? [[User:Adrmcr|Adrmcr]] ([[User talk:Adrmcr|talk]]) 18:36, 21 March 2025 (UTC)

:Oh, right, I had forgotten about that page! I like the idea of doing something with it, it's currently almost impossible to find. To give it more visibility, I think we could move its contents here. I'm not sure if we should add them to the existing table or put them in a new section, maybe at the bottom. I could see something like this working:

{| class="sortable wikitable"
! rowspan="2" scope="col" class="unsortable" | Thumbnail
! rowspan="2" scope="col" data-sort-type=text| Title
! rowspan="2" scope="col" data-sort-type=text| question
! rowspan="2" scope="col" class="unsortable" | Randall's answer
! colspan="3"| Article available in... <noinclude></noinclude> ''(click to sort)'' <noinclude></noinclude>
|-
! scope="col" data-sort-type=number | Blog
! scope="col" data-sort-type=number | Books
! scope="col" data-sort-type=number | YouTube
|-
| rowspan="7" |
| rowspan="7" |'''Good Question'''
|[https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd ''"How Long Is the Drive to the Edge of the Universe?"'']
<div align="right">—Randall Munroe</div>
|Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Cras sagittis lacus sit amet porta vulputate.
|1st "[https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd Good Question]" NYT article, on 2012‑07‑10
|
|
|-
|[https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd ''"Shark or Orca: Which Should You Fear More?"'']
<div align="right">—Randall Munroe</div>
|rutrum eros id, tincidunt neque. Integer hendrerit magna ac nibh fringilla,
|2nd "[https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd Good Question]" NYT article, on 2012‑07‑10
|
|
|-
|[https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd ''" How Many Languages Could a Child Speak?"'']
<div align="right">—Randall Munroe</div>
|non venenatis lacus hendrerit. Pellentesque ullamcorper dolor eget nunc gravida, nec euismod risus efficitur.
|3rd "[https://www.nytimes.com/column/good-question-randall-munroe-xkcd Good Question]" NYT article, on 2012‑07‑10
|
|
|}

:The old page could become a redirect to the new section/NYT table. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:49, 22 March 2025 (UTC)
::Anyone? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:56, 23 March 2025 (UTC)

== Striking a match on Titan - additional ==

Depends on how you read it, but try to strike a safety match ''on'' Titan probably would do nothing at all (just like if you tried to strike it on a bit of Earth rock, here on the surface of Earth), as it needs the chemicals in the striking-strip to (in small amounts) combine with the oxidiser in the match-head coating to spark up and ''then'' prompt the relatively slower-burning process that leads to the atmosphere-fed burning of the 'stick'.

This means that striker+match reaction will also work in most situations (including underwater and in vacuum), though of course may then fail to get significant amount of post-striking ignition to continue. As non-safety/strike-anywhere ones will, given the friction (hmmm... would you get good friction off of the ice-boulders of Titan?).

But coating your matchheads with wax (or manufactured with a suitable coating) is advisable for 'survival kit' matches, to prevent infusion of water to 'dampen the squib'. Would be interesting to know to what degree the anoxic atmosphere of Titan might seep in and similarly suppress the various types of ready-to-react compounds, before even the lack of free oxygen ends the intended flare-up. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.26.37|172.71.26.37]] 10:19, 29 March 2025 (UTC)

:Uhh, what article are you talking about? This info could be useful to add in the index! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:06, 29 March 2025 (UTC)
::Easily searchable (or made visible as per my recent change), it's not the only "match" or "Titan" reference, but there aren't so many of either that you need to check much further than the first appearance of either, probably.
::But, as you ask, it's in the Book 2 "Short Answers #3" collection (the penultimate one of that grouping). And, now that I've reached home, I can also tell you that it's pp.141-142 in the UK hardback edition (whether or not that's identical/near to your own copy's appearance of it).
::However, no ''more'' info needs to be added, IMO. I changed the prior edit (not sure who/which IP did it, without checking, but their edit popped it up on my own radar as worthy of minor refinement) to just say that it's oxidiser, not just "oxygen" (there's oxygen in the "stick" and any other "head"-coatings applied, but basically incidental to the initial ignition when it's the oxidiser component that primarily contributes to that). And, to my mild and gratifying surprise, now find that this is pretty much exactly what the Short Answer says (except in 'Merkin form of "oxidizer" - so now, I think to myself, did I write my edit in Leftpondian (as I should, just because Noah Webster wanted to be a Lexicographical Edgelord), or Rightpondian (as is my default habit, because that's how I was educated)... need to check that!), in the form of a summary which ''our'' summary pretty much matches<sup>[[[559: No Pun Intended|''NPI!'']]]</sup> in all useful ways.
::I added the stuff here, about the Safety Match detail, as a bonus bit of info for anyone who cares to scan down here to know this additional thing that I happen to know (but not necessarily explain well?)... Randall does not go that far into the details in his book-answer (he does divert into a footnote about KClO<sub>3</sub> being used in airliner oxygen masks, but that's beyond the scope of adding here, and he totally avoids the safety/strike-anywhere distinctions). Adding the above to the Explanation Table would be overkill, and misrepresent Randall's original format to no real benefit (except maybe some curious pyromaniacs, on Earth or elsewhere) [[Special:Contributions/172.69.195.179|172.69.195.179]] 16:58, 29 March 2025 (UTC)

== A bit disappointed in the lack of progress ==

I mean, I understand that this is a volunteer project and I can't force people to work on this thing, hell, I don't even have the time to fill out most of the pages even if I HAVE read the What IF in question. However, it's still a bit disheartening to see so many "too shorts" even after several weeks. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.208.133|172.69.208.133]] 12:32, 17 April 2025 (UTC)
:If it was up to me, I'd solve the issue of too many "Too short"s by... deleting the unnecessary "Too short"s... I have no desire to expand the sufficient summaries with much longer reruns of the full answers. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.216.168|162.158.216.168]] 15:39, 17 April 2025 (UTC)
::I think the progress we made is still a lot, considering the state the index was previously. Also, it's not the only incomplete thing, there are about other 80 incomplete pages here. Also, as I said a while back:
::If the explanation is satisfactory and mentions everything except things like the methodology used and minor "sub-answers", please remove the notices! "Could I/we/humanity <bar>?" probably doesn't need much more than "[Yes/No], but <unexpected thing...>". Agree, but usually the entire article revolves around that unexpected thing, so i think we should summarise that too. Again, feel free to remove the ones you're ''sure'' can't be made any longer in a useful way. At the start of the project, I added a lot and didn't have time to go read the article for each one! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:03, 17 April 2025 (UTC)

== "nonmonomolecular" and peptides ==

About "the longest sequence of letters using one number key": Yamaki, Sahori B. et al.'s article published on 15 March, 2005 in ''Journal of Colloid and Interface Science'' volume 283, issue 2 on pages 464–471 titled ''Morphological and structural characteristics of diazo dyes at the air–water interface: in situ Brewster angle microscopy and polarized UV/vis analysis'' uses "nonmonomolecular" (with neither hyphens nor dashes nor anything else), a word with 9 consecutive letters using the 6 key a total of 20 times. The word also has [[:wikt:nonmonomolecular|an article on Wiktionary]].

About the peptides: "Glycylglycylglycyl[…]glycine" and other spelled-out amino acid sequences (like titin's) status as a word is dubious. If we assume they are all considerable as words, there is no upper limit on peptide sequence word length (e. g. "glycyl" adds 6 to the length and 0 to the count of unallowed letters (U, B, X, O, J, Z), "phenylalanyl" adds 12 and 0, respectively, etc.). [[Special:Contributions/172.70.39.208|172.70.39.208]] 21:21, 27 April 2025 (UTC)

:Great! You can add all that in the explanation in the main table :D   --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 14:32, 28 April 2025 (UTC)

== Contact Randall (or his team): link rot on "Pressure Cooker" What if? page ==

On this page: https://what-if.xkcd.com/40/

There's a link ostensibly to an article about O2F2, link text is "Another article". It goes to lateralscience.com. Unfortunately, the original site there has been replaced by a domain squatter advertising online casinos. I don't know how to contact Mr. Munroe to tell him. [[User:Nitpicking|Nitpicking]] ([[User talk:Nitpicking|talk]]) 20:23, 12 May 2025 (UTC)

:You can just shoot him an email at his personal address: rmunroe@gmail.com   --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:03, 13 May 2025 (UTC)

== 10th Anniversary Annotations ==

Hello, new here. I honestly have no idea what I am doing. But I read the 10th anniversary edition of ''[[What If?]]'', and one annotation, in the same chapter, added dimethylmercury far off to the right, and about halfway up the y axis. [[User:Majordesmosnerd|Majordesmosnerd]] ([[User talk:Majordesmosnerd|talk]]) 22:18, 19 March 2026 (UTC)
:We as a community have not decided what to do with annotations, as there are many of them scattered throughout the book and it would be a painstaking process to document them all. I would like invite further discussion about this so we can come to a consensus. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 01:05, 20 March 2026 (UTC)
::Agree it'd be nice to have them documented somewhere! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 12:21, 4 April 2026 (UTC)
:::How would we format it? Do we want to make a new template for these annotations? I'd be willing to go through my book if I can find the time for it between all my work. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 19:41, 5 April 2026 (UTC)
::::Maybe a second table somewhere else on the page, with a link from the main table (in the book column?) that goes to the second table, so a user can jump between them when they see the little "see annotations!" link in the book column? (or another column?) I've already filled the table with anchors, so for example to jump to chapter 34 of the second book just can just type [[#2-34]] and it'll take you there. Or for the blog, type any number like [[#55]]. I'm not sure how we should format the annotations, maybe copy the text around it (coloured black like normal text) and make the annotations bold? Or create a {{tl|red}} template that just makes the text of the annotation red. It could work! Unfortunately i don't have the book, i bought the first one :( ㅤ [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:06, 7 April 2026 (UTC)
:::::I think that a second page would be smart. We could do something like <nowiki>[[what if? articles/Annotations]]</nowiki> with a table: page number, chapter, transcript, and I'll see if I can find the images for the actual annotations somewhere. As for formatting, I think we should do black text for describing any doodles that Randall made, then red text for the actual annotation itself. Let me know if you have any other concerns. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 16:28, 15 April 2026 (UTC)
::::::Sure, sounds good. The reason I was thinking of doing it all in the same page is that readers could jump back and forth from the explanation of the annotations to the explanation of the chapter and vice versa, without having to reload the page. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:36, 17 April 2026 (UTC)
:::::::So a different table, but on the same page on a different section? That can work for me. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 18:49, 19 April 2026 (UTC)
::::::::Yeah exactly! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:26, 21 April 2026 (UTC)
== new youtube short ==
Add why is the sky blue youtube channel short that is on xkcd what if channel. {{unsigned ip|185.88.42.163|12:58, 23 April 2026 (UTC)}}
:on it! please remember to sign your comments with <code><nowiki>~~~~</nowiki></code> in the future, thanks! [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 18:47, 23 April 2026 (UTC)

== interesting things ==
I just noticed that what if 12 (Raindrop) has a different background color. Just found it interesting.--[[User:1234231587678|1234231587678]] ([[User talk:1234231587678|talk]]) 20:50, 26 May 2026 (UTC)
:{{what if|12}} seems to have the same background colour on my end. [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:18, 27 May 2026 (UTC)

Template:incomplete transcript

2026-05-27T15:17:31Z

FaviFake:

<includeonly>{{#ifeq:{{PAGENAME}}|Main Page||{{notice|class=notice-incomplete-transcript|bcolor=04b60c|image=Ambox warning green construction.png|'''This is one of [[:Category:Incomplete transcripts|{{PAGESINCAT:Incomplete transcripts|R}} incomplete transcripts]]{{#if:{{{1|}}}|:'''<br>{{{1|}}} If you can fix this issue, '''[{{fullurl:{{{target|{{FULLPAGENAME}}}}}|action=edit}} edit the page]'''!|.'''<br>Please help by [{{fullurl:{{{target|{{FULLPAGENAME}}}}}|action=edit}} editing it]!}}}}{{#ifeq:{{NAMESPACE}}|Template||[[Category:Incomplete transcripts]]}}}}</includeonly><noinclude>{{incomplete transcript}}

{{incomplete transcript|Need to find a better way to transcribe the last section.}}
See also the {{tl|incomplete}} and the {{tl|notice}} templates.

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* This template automatically adds the page and pages it's trancluded into to [[:Category:Incomplete transcripts]].
[[Category:Templates]]
</noinclude>

Template:incomplete

2026-05-27T15:17:09Z

FaviFake: only bold

<includeonly>{{#ifeq:{{PAGENAME}}|Main Page||{{notice|class=notice-incomplete|bcolor=0d5bb3|image=Ambox warning blue construction.png|{{#ifeq:{{NAMESPACE}}| |
{{#if:{{{1|}}}
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{{incomplete|Need to find a better way to format the last section.}}

See also the {{tl|incomplete transcript}} and the {{tl|notice}} templates.

== Usage ==
* You must supply a reason, for example: <code><nowiki>{{incomplete|The title text isn't explained}}</nowiki></code>; otherwise, the template displays an error.
* If the page using this template is transcluded into another page, the "edit" link will be incorrect, unless you specify in the template call the name of the page in which it is called. Especially for the latest comic (transcluded into the main page), the template call should look like this: <code><nowiki>{{incomplete|reason|target=3049: Incoming Asteroid}}</nowiki></code>
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735: Floor

2026-05-27T15:13:53Z

FaviFake: The three cueballs are adults per the caption

{{comic
| number = 735
| date = May 3, 2010
| title = Floor
| image = floor.png
| titletext = We once got grounded when we convinced the FAA to block flights through our county because of ash clouds.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Hot lava (game)|The floor is lava}} is a game many kids play where they pretend the floor is {{w|lava}}, meaning that they can't step on it or else they'll get 'burned'. In this comic, the three kids are taking this game too seriously (and in a nerdy way), causing great damage to the house with what appears to be a garden hose and some dynamite. Stopping a lava flow by diverting it into an artificial trench or cooling the flow with (sea)water are both tactics that have been used in the past [https://www.usgs.gov/observatories/hvo/news/volcano-watch-can-hawaiian-lava-flows-be-diverted with varying success].

Of course, it is unknown where exactly the kids got the dynamite from, given from the explosion it sounds as if the dynamite was real, unlike the fictitious lava it's 'saving' the house from. Dynamite is not a common feature in most houses.{{cn}}

The title text refers to events like the 2010 eruptions at {{w|Eyjafjallajökull}}, the ash clouds of which caused the shutdown of most of Europe's {{w|IFR}} airspace. The first joke there is that grounding a child often means to consign them to their bedroom for a set period of hours (as a punishment), whereas grounding a plane means to disallow any use of that plane for an extended period of time. The most notable example of this is {{w|Concorde}}, which has been indefinitely grounded. The second joke is that causing panic and diverting a large number of flights would cause lots of financial damage, and would normally be subject to more punishment than simply giving the kids a time-out.

==Transcript==
:[Three Cueball-like kids are in a living room. Furniture and other things are knocked over, broken, or tilted. The first kid is holding a handle of a plunger with cables going offscreen.]
:First Kid: I've dynamited a trench through the kitchen to divert flow!
:'''BOOM'''

:[The second kid is aiming a hose at the floor.]
:Second Kid: More hoses! We need to cool and solidify the surface layer!
:''FWOOSH''

:[The third kid is standing on a chair, using a cell phone or radio.]
:Third Kid: Where are the damn helicopters?

:[Caption beneath the panel:]
:Like many kids, we sometimes pretended the floor was lava.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Volcanoes]]

[[Category:Comics featuring children]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

Rob

2026-05-25T19:03:43Z

FaviFake:

{{Infobox character
| image = Rob.png
| imagesize = 200px
| caption = '
| first_appearance = [[276: Fixed Width]]
}}

<noinclude>:''For a list of comics, see [[:Category:Comics featuring Rob|Comics featuring Rob]].''
:''For the generic Rob, see [[Cueball]].''</noinclude>

'''Rob''' is a [[stick figure]] character in [[xkcd]]. Rob has no identifying features and is a [[Cueball]]. In most cases, he seems to represent the same character, usually being portrayed as [[Black Hat]]'s roommate. He is one of the few of Randall's characters to be given a name. In [[276: Fixed Width]], his screen name appears as "rob", and in [[723: Seismic Waves]] he is posting on the internet as "robm163". In [[838: Incident]] his username appears as "robm". In [[1783: Emails]], Cueball replies to his email in the title text. After the Emails comic, Rob is not mentioned for 800 comics before the name is used in [[2584: Headline Words]], which reveals that Randall and Rob are different people. In [[2718: New Year's Eve Party]], Cueball and Rob are revealed to be different people.

==Name==

The name for this character was discussed at length. See the following [[explain xkcd:Community portal|Community portal]] topics:
* [[explain xkcd talk:Community portal/Proposals#Cueball/Rob|Proposals § Cueball/Rob]]
* [[explain xkcd talk:Community portal/Proposals#Merge Cueball & Rob|Proposals § Merge Cueball & Rob]]
* [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#Re-proposing merging Cueball and Rob|Proposals § Re-proposing merging Cueball and Rob]]
* [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#New character category for blonde woman news reporter (from 1699)|Proposals § New character category for blonde woman news reporter (from 1699)]]

Rob's name originated from the comic [[276: Fixed Width]], where a Cueball is seen at a computer, messaging someone known as 'emily' with the username 'rob'. This name appeared in several more comics, eventually sprouting into a character separate from Cueball.

Initially being introduced after [[user:TheHYPO]] noticed that a page for Rob was created for this character, separate from Cueball, arguments on whether to merge Rob and Cueball sprung up. The initial discussion devolved into an argument about Wikipedia's credibility, and the merger was re-proposed twice afterwards. In all, three main stances emerged.
# Merge Rob and Cueball,
# Rename Megan back to Cutie, to maintain general/specific character separation, or
# Keep it as is, with Rob being separate.
Lots of arguments ensued, and (as you could probably infer if you are reading this) Rob remained a separate specific character from Cueball, though Megan was not renamed. All proposals on this topic have since been archived.

==Relationships==
Rob had a relationship with a woman known as <emily> on IM. This ended tragically in [[276: Fixed Width]] when he told her the relationship was only for sex while he wasn't really paying attention to what he was writing; he just wanted their chat responses to line up nicely on the screen. Two years later, in 2009, he had a relationship of a few months with what ended up being a spam bot. He discovered this when he asked the bot to pass what it calls a VK test, a reference to the world of Blade Runner, where they use a Voight-Kampff (VK) test to help determine if someone is a replicant. This happened in [[632: Suspicion]].

In [[647: Scary]] we find that he has a nephew born after September 11, 2001, but by 2009 he was old enough to have discussions with Rob about it.

In [[1102: Fastest-Growing]] it seems that Rob is [[Black Hat|Black Hat's]] roommate. In fact, it's possible that within the xkcd continuity, every time we see Black Hat's roommate, it's Rob. But with no name mentioned it is not enough to list these comics as comics featuring Rob.

{{navbox-characters}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Minor characters]]

75: Curse Levels

2026-05-25T19:02:19Z

FaviFake: i think we should use both

{{comic
| number = 75
| date = March 13, 2006
| title = Curse Levels
| image = curse levels.jpg
| titletext = I find so much fun in language.
}}

==Explanation==
This is the fourth comic in the [[:Category:My Hobby|My Hobby series]]. Curse words (aka: swear words/profanities) are disrespectful words that are typically impolite to use in public. As noted in the strip, there are "levels" of curse words ranging from those "mild" words that are more acceptable to use, to those "severe" words that are considered very impolite (the milder curse words can be used on network television in the US, for example, while severe ones can not). One usually uses milder cursing because either they personally don't feel comfortable using the more severe words, or because it would not be appropriate in the context (such as on network television, in the presence of children, etc). Thus, mixing mild and severe curses in one usage does not usually occur, as the effect achieved by keeping the one curse word mild is negated by using another that is severe.

In a mild curse, "gosh-darned" is typically used as a {{w|minced oath}} of "God-damned" when the latter would be inappropriate. This is mixed with "{{w|cunt}}" — a vulgar term for the female genitalia, considered the most offensive non-slur swear word in many English-speaking countries.

==Transcript==
:My hobby: mixing curse levels
:Randall: What a gosh-darned cunt.

{{Comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Randall Munroe]]
[[Category:My Hobby]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Comics with lowercase text]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]

Kidball

2026-05-25T18:57:59Z

FaviFake: assume he's a MALE, i meant

{{Infobox character
| image = Kidball.png
| imagesize = 200px
| caption = '
| first_appearance = [[38: Apple Jacks]]
}}

<noinclude>:''For a list of comics, see [[:Category:Comics featuring Kidball|Comics featuring Kidball]].''</noinclude>

'''Kidball''' is a [[stick figure]] character in [[xkcd]]. His appearance is like a [[Cueball]], but as a child. He commonly appears in classrooms led by [[Miss Lenhart]] (or [[Randall|her substitute]], alongside other kids like [[Jill]].

==Name==
The name "Kidball" is derived from Cueball, taking the suffix of Cueball's name and adding "Kid" as a prefix. See [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#New Character Proposal for Kid Cueballs|Proposals § New Character Proposal for Kid Cueballs]] for more info.

==Personality==
Kidball somewhat lacks a distinct personality, mostly appearing as a 'filler character' for comics, perhaps with other children in classroom or play-based scenes. This is similar to his adult counterpart [[Cueball]], which he was for a long time conflated due to being as much a child-sized 'everyman' (or even being [[735: Floor|several such examples]], in the same comic). He even [[:Category:Multiple Cueballs|used to be counted]] as a 'full' Cueball when used directly alongside an adult version, in situations where his obvious status as a child perhaps set him out as most deliberately distinctive from any other character. He rarely speak, with a few exceptions such as [[3132: Coastline Similarity]], where Kidball, not knowing about {{w|continental drift}} states a belief that one continent [[2885|plagiarized]] the other.

{{navbox-characters}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Minor characters]]

Kidball

2026-05-25T18:57:43Z

FaviFake: i think we can safelt assume hes a child

3158: Shielding Chart

2026-05-25T18:54:15Z

FaviFake: From the [[explain xkcd:Editor FAQ#citation|Editor FAQ § [Citation needed]:]] "This template should only be placed when there is a deeper sense of humor and should not be overused."

{{comic
| number = 3158
| date = October 22, 2025
| title = Shielding Chart
| image = shielding_chart_2x.png
| imagesize = 740x720px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Sharks can occasionally travel short distances through air when pursuing prey, but their attenuation coefficient is pretty high.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic is part of a series on [[:Category:Confusion matrices|confusion matrices]].

Various hazardous (or merely obnoxious) materials, objects, and effects can have their danger reduced with specialized protective equipment. The yellow squares are where the shield fails to protect against the object. The grey-yellow squares are where the shield is partially successful, but still presents some risk. The grey squares are where the shield succeeds.

The first five barriers are materials/conditions which may be used to block some things and not others, which makes for a relatively normal comparison matrix. The last five barriers are devices which are deliberately designed and manufactured to block the last five materials/effects. Comparing those with effects for which they aren't designed is presented for absurdity.

The first three hazards - Gamma Rays, Neutrons, and Alpha Particles - represent different types of radiation. Their associated "beep" and "click" sounds mirror real detection behavior: "beep" corresponds to ionizing radiation like gamma and alpha particles, detected by modern radiation detectors, while "click" refers to neutron detection, which uses a separate type of counter designed for neutral particles. {{w|Geiger counter|Geiger counters}}, an earlier form of radiation detector, also clicked.

All but two tiles feature [[Cueball]] (or in two cases [[Hairy]]) trying to make use of that column's chosen 'protective shield', although in the case of some scenarios (involving vacuum or water) he may also be sufficiently equipped against the environment he finds himself in. Also present will be the row's specific 'effect', either in its own right (an object or creature that embodies the phenomenon automatically) or as conveyed by [[Megan]] (when not just present as onlooker) who may also have had the 'shield' primarily delegated to her. The two main exceptions are where Cueball himself emits the sound (from within 'protective' suits that turn out to be ineffectual sound-blockers), to apparently annoy Megan, and depictions of radio reception (which always show Cueball's attempt to transmit, whether or not it shows a successful incoming message).

Some hazards, such as {{w|alpha particles}}, a form of radiation with particularly low penetrative power, can be easily deterred by common things; even a relatively short distance through air is enough to minimize their impact. Comparatively, more dangerous hazards, such as the far more penetrative {{w|gamma rays}}, are unaffected by all but the shielding methods actually intended for them. No effect is either all effective or all ineffective, against each form of 'shielding', and neither is any instance of shield consistent against all effects.

The title text notes that, while the shark hazard is shown on the chart to be entirely nullified by a sufficient air barrier, in reality sharks are capable of attacking prey even if it is a short distance out of the water. However, it claims a high "attenuation coefficient", which is an {{tvtropes|ExpospeakGag|overly scientific way of saying}} that you don't need a ''lot'' of air between you and the shark before it can't hurt you. Indeed, while sharks can jump out of the water to a certain height, there's a hard line between "vulnerable" and "out of reach", and a person can be within arm's reach of a shark's attack while they themselves are in no danger whatsoever. So long as they ''don't'' unwisely reach out to tempt fate.

This table might imply that lead is the best defense against everything in general, but it is toxic, so don't bring lead with you at all times.

Cueball saying "Kitty!" in the shark hazard row most likely is a reference to [[231: Cat Proximity]].

===Table===
{| class="wikitable" | style="background:#E6C3C3;"
! Shielding Chart
! scope="col"| {{w|Air}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Lead}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Water}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Glass}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Vacuum}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Oven mitts}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Armor}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Hazmat suit|Bio-hazard suit}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Faraday cage}}
! scope="col"| {{w|Shark cage}}
|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Gamma rays}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Gamma rays are not significantly shielded by air.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Lead is commonly used as {{w|Lead shielding|shielding}} against gamma rays. Lead works because of its density and high atomic number, scattering gamma rays.
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|Water can be used to shield against gamma rays, but you need at least 10 feet of water between you and the gamma rays for it to work.
|colspan=7; style="background:#FFF978;"|Gamma rays have the highest energy of any type of light and have no mass or charge, making them pass through most materials easily.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Neutrons}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Neutrons are not stopped by low-density materials such as air.
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|Lead's high density means that neutrons will keep bumping into lead nuclei, losing their energy through inelastic scattering. However since lead nuclei are much heavier than neutrons, most of the energy will remain with the neutron; as a result, many collisions are needed to slow the neutrons. Some neutrons will also be absorbed by the nuclei, although the {{w|Cross section (physics)|cross section}} is rather low.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Since protons and neutrons have almost the same mass, a collision with a hydrogen atom in water will result in the neutron losing almost half of its energy, resulting in a very rapid attenuation. Moreover the cross section for the fusion of neutrons and protons is high, leading to most neutrons being captured to form deuterium.
|colspan=7; style="background:#FFF978;"|None of these materials are dense enough to slow or absorb neutrons in significant quantities.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Alpha particles}}
|colspan=4; style="background:#C4C5C7"|As alpha particles are almost completely unable to travel through most materials, any of these would effectively stop them. Even if they didn't, the intervening air and distance to Cueball would prevent them being detected in any case. In the third panel, Cueball questions if his equipment is working, as this is the only thing which isn't detected within the first four shields.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|While alpha particles are unable to travel through air, they can move freely in a vacuum. As such, alpha particles are able to reach Cueball in this scenario, activating his detector and allowing Cueball to know that his equipment is indeed working properly.
|colspan=3; style="background:#C4C5C7;"|As with the first four shields, any of these materials would block the particles, and in any case they would have a hard time travelling through air to reach Cueball regardless of the shield provided.
|colspan=2; style="background:#FFF978;"|There are gaps in both the cages through which the particles could pass. In both cases, the emitter has been moved closer to the observer, because otherwise the effect would be masked by the intervening air.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Light}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Light passes easily through air; if it didn't, we would not be able to see.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|As lead is a solid, opaque material, light is not able to pass through it.
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|Water is mostly transparent to visible light. It will attenuate over long distances, but won't be quickly blocked.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|As glass is a largely transparent substance, light is usually able to pass through it.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Because a lack of air does not impact the travel of light, it reaches Cueball without issue.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Cueball is able to use the opaque oven mitts to cover the light source, successfully preventing the light from reaching him.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|The helmet Cueball is wearing, except the eye slit, is opaque, blocking the light from reaching him.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|As with the oven mitts, Hairy uses the helmet part of the biohazard suit to block the light source.
|colspan=2; style="background:#FFF978;"|As both types of cages have holes in them, it is easy for the light to pass through the holes and reach Cueball.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Sound}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Air is the most common medium through which we perceive sound. It would not serve as an effective barrier between a source of sound and someone's ears, unless it was over a very great distance.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Lead is very dense, and is in fact used for soundproofing due to its resistance to buffeting by airborne sound waves. But, as an extremely dense solid, it is a very fast conductor of vibration within itself (so long as the thickness of the material does not invoke the dampening softness and attenuate those vibrations). In this case, Megan is directly knocking upon the lead screen itself, which seems to be enough for the sound of the knocking to emerge at Cueball's side.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Sound travels significantly faster and further in water than in air, making it difficult to locate and understand, but certainly not doing any good when it comes to ''blocking'' sound. The image in this square is of a dolphin,<sup>[[[285: Wikipedian Protester#top|''cetacean needed'']]]</sup> detecting fish using sound waves, which it is very good at doing precisely ''because'' its sounds travel very well through water.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Glass, while useful for muffling sound, cannot block it entirely, as anyone whose neighbors mow the lawn at 6:00 can attest to.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|"In space, no one can hear you scream." In a vacuum (like space), there are no atoms or molecules to carry sound waves.
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|Oven mitts are thick enough that they block some of the sound if a person shouts into them, but it will not be enough to fully block out the sound.
| colspan=2; style="background:#FFF978;"|The two cases of whether sound can penetrate suits are the only two cases where Cueball is trying (successfully) to inflict the phenomenon on [[Megan]], who otherwise features only as the (attempted) instigator. Neither suit is able (or intended) to significantly block sound waves.
| colspan=2; style="background:#FFF978;"|The cages are open enough that their ability to block sound is negligible, and standing in one will do very little to block out sound.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Heat}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Air can be a fairly effective thermal insulator when constrained, as in {{w|aerogels}} and many types of insulation. However, freely moving air as depicted in this panel flows as it heats up, transferring heat from the campfire to Cueball's marshmallow. Additionally, air does little to block thermal radiation from the heat source.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Lead conducts heat, allowing Cueball to toast a marshmallow on the surface of the shield. However, since lead is poisonous, he should not do this.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Heat will raise the temperature of water. If the temperature is raised high enough the water will start to boil; boiling has long been used by humanity to prepare food. Marshmallows however are not meant to be boiled.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Cueball appears to be holding a glass bottle over an open fire, into which he has presumably placed his marshmallows. Depending on the temperature, the type of glass, and its thickness, it is possible to heat the contents of a glass container this way, but if the container is unsuitable this can be dangerous to the user, because the glass may abruptly shatter. Also, it is unclear how he proposes to consume the sticky marshmallow mess this would create.
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|The lack of matter in a vacuum completely blocks transmission by conduction and convection, the two main ways in which heat is spread. It still allows transmission by radiation, which is less efficient. For the specific example of the thermos shown in the image, the way they are constructed completely blocks radiation, but there are enough residual air particles for a very slow convection. The fact that the shielding is made from one single (very thin) piece, and it has lips, also allows some conduction.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Cueball is holding a pan over an open fire while wearing oven mitts. Pans whose grip or handle is not made of a material that conducts less heat than the pan proper are dangerous to grab onto with one's bare hands: wearing oven mitts protects the user from heat. It should be noted that, depending on the weight of the pan and the time the pan needs to be held over a fire to prepare its contents, this can be quite tiring for the user. Also, this implies that oven mitts are a better heat shield than a vacuum, which isn't correct (at least as far as pure heat conduction goes).
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A suit of armor is made of metal, which will conduct the heat and do little to protect one's hands against an open flame. The inside of the gloves will be made of some kind of cloth and/or leather, which, as well as giving little protection, might pose a fire hazard.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Bio-hazard suits are designed to help filter air and allow the user to handle dangerous chemicals. However, most bio-hazard suits are made out of fabrics with a laminate coating, both of which are prone to burning and allow heat to pass through.
| colspan=2; style="background:#FFF978;"|Both cages have a minimal effect on the heat from a fire. Depending on the intensity of the fire and the distance from the cage this can create a comfortably warm temperature to the person inside of the cage.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Swords}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Air exerts negligible force against objects of such high density at low speed, and cannot stop Megan's sword's thrust.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Lead is a heavy and dense metal, and as a result, it can stop blows from a sword.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|While water has a greater force than air against objects, it is still not enough to stop Megan's attack.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Glass is easily broken by sharp blows, especially if it isn't tempered, and as a result does not stop Megan's sword.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A vacuum has no resistance against objects and unsurprisingly is not able to stop Megan's attack.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Oven mitts are typically made of fabric, which would provide only limited protection. They also do not cover the full body.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|The metallic armor Cueball is wearing was probably designed to stop penetrating and slashing sword blows, with further layers beneath to dampen impacts.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Swords are sharp, and as such are able to break through the thin hazmat suit Cueball is wearing.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A Faraday cage can be a fine mesh, optimal to screen out various radio frequencies of EM radiation but not intended to stop anything else and comparatively delicate against any physical penetration.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A shark cage, while able to provide resistance against larger threats, has holes through which Megan's sword can go.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Particulate matter#Health problems|Toxic dust}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Dust can travel through air, hanging onto small currents. Air does nothing to protect Cueball.
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|{{w|Lead poisoning|Lead is poisonous}}, so while a solid lead barrier would prevent toxic dust from passing through, any dust or metal fragments from the shield would still be dangerous.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Water actually can be {{w|Dust abatement|used to prevent the spread of dust}}. However, toxic dust that gets into drinking water will {{w|Water pollution#Groundwater pollution|contaminate it}}, and could cause health problems, just as airborne toxic dust can.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Dust cannot travel through glass, and being fully encased in a glass bell protects one from dust (though it would bring its own problems).
| style="background:#FFF978;"|With no air to slow it down, dust in space can move at dangerously high speeds, possibly fast enough to tear through Cueball's space suit.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Oven mitts are worn on the hands and do not normally interfere with one's breathing. However, if there is a notable amount of toxic dust in the air, holding an oven mitt over one's face is better than no protection.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A suit of armor still allows the wearer to breathe, and provides no particular protection from dust.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|A biohazard suit is fully enclosed with its own internal oxygen supply, and so protects the wearer from airborne particles.
| colspan=2; style="background:#FFF978;"|Both cages are too open to provide any significant protection against dust.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Radio}}
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Radio waves are more than able to travel through air. This is what allows walkie-talkies to work.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Although lead is a relatively poor conductor and therefore attenuates radio waves less than most metals, a lead enclosure can still work as a Faraday cage with a sufficiently thick layer of lead.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Radio waves from two-way radios, like the kind shown in the comic, {{w|Radio propagation#Direct modes (line-of-sight)|cannot penetrate deep water}}. There are {{w|Radio propagation#Surface modes (groundwave)|radio frequencies that ''can'' penetrate deep water}}, but these have a much lower frequency, require more powerful transmitters, and (in the case of {{w|Extremely low frequency#Difficulties of ELF communication|extremely low frequencies}}) cannot transmit audio.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|In a similar way that glass is transparent to visual light, it is also transparent to radio waves, allowing them to pass through. It is also in this frame that Cueball begins to have doubts about whether being put in a glass case is part of his mission.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|As there is nothing getting in the way of radio waves in a vacuum, radios work very well in space. This allows ground control to communicate with astronauts in space.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Oven mitts, typically being made of fabric, have no effect on radio waves.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|A metal suit of armor blocks radio waves. This is because metals are very good electrical conductors, which block the radio waves.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Biohazard suits do not block radio waves, and someone wearing such a suit can send and receive radio transmissions without issue.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|A {{w|Faraday cage}} is specifically designed to block electromagnetic fields such as radio waves. In fact, this is the ''only'' thing listed that it blocks.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|The openings in a shark cage are too wide for the cage to experience the properties of a Faraday cage. Cueball again questions why his mission requires this particular protective equipment.

|-
! scope="row"| {{w|Sharks}}
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Sharks cannot travel very far on land or in the air.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Shielding yourself with lead plates will effectively protect you against sharks.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Sharks live in water, so water is not an effective shield against sharks.{{cn}}
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|Glass will effectively protect you against sharks, provided that it is thick enough. In fact, sharks are commonly (and safely) shown to the public in aquariums.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|In the vacuum of space, Cueball is very far from sharks' ocean habitat (though he may be at risk of [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5xcvAoKojo dolphins]).
| style="background:#FFF978;"|Although shark-shaped oven mitts are quite common due to their similar appearance, oven mitts are not very effective at stopping sharks.{{cn}}
| style="background:#DDDCB2;"|Depending on the design of the armor, a shark might be able to permanently deform it enough that it causes injury, though the more flexible {{w|Chain_mail#Practical_uses|chain mail}} ''is'' successfully used to prevent actual piercing damage from bites.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A biohazard suit is weak enough that a shark can rip through it.
| style="background:#FFF978;"|A Faraday cage is weak enough that a shark can rip through it.
| style="background:#C4C5C7;"|A shark cage is specifically designed to protect against sharks. In fact, this is the ''only'' hazard here that it blocks.
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript|Check if it's complete.}}
:[The whole comic is in one panel]
:[A 10x10 matrix sits in the middle with rows labelled as follows:]
:Gamma Rays
:Neutrons
:Alpha Particles
:Light
:Sound
:Heat
:Swords
:Toxic Dust
:Radio
:Sharks
:[The columns are:]
:Air
:Lead
:Water
:Glass
:Vacuum
:Oven Mitts
:Armor
:Bio-Hazard Suit
:Faraday Cage
:Shark Cage


:[In all of the Gamma Ray boxes, Cueball stands next to a gamma ray emitter with a smattering of dots a short distance away from it, which is perched on a table as necessary, a geiger counter held in his hand or worn.]

:[Gamma Rays vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[Just standing a few feet from the emitter. The geiger counter Cueball wears beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep!

:[Gamma Rays vs. Lead - gray tile]
:[The gamma ray emitter and the table have a lead enclosure covering them. The geiger counter, held towards everything else in Cueball's hand, does not beep.]

:[Gamma Rays vs. Water - grayish-yellow tile]
:[The gamma ray emitter and table are placed in a large, nearly full, glass of water. Cueball's outstretched geiger counter beeps once:] Beep!

:[Gamma Rays vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[A glass 'bell-jar' covers the gamma ray emitter, atop the table, the geiger counter beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep!

:[Gamma Rays vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[The gamma ray emitter appears to be held within an open hatch of a satellite. The satellite, together with a spacesuited Cueball, can be seen to be in orbit around the Earth. His chest-mounted geiger counter is transmitting three beeps:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Gamma Rays vs. Oven Mitts - yellow tile]
:[Megan stands to the left of the gamma ray emitter, wearing oven mitts and covering the emitter with one hand. Cueball’s body-mounted geiger counter beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Gamma Rays vs. Armor - yellow tile]
:[Cueball stands to the right of the gamma ray emitter wearing a suit of plate armor. From inside the armor, his Geiger counter beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Gamma Rays vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Cueball stands to the right of the gamma ray emitter wearing a bio-hazard suit. From inside the suit, his Geiger counter beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Gamma Rays vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is surrounded by a mesh cage. His geiger counter beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Gamma Rays vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is within a barred cage. His geiger counter beeps three times:] Beep Beep Beep

:[In all of the Neutron boxes, Cueball stands next to a neutron emitter, that looks like two half-sphere shells that are angled slightly open in Cueball's direction, in similar scenarios to the above but with a heftier pedestal in place of the table. No visible effects emit from the emitter. Cueball holds the top handle of the same large detector in each scenario.]

:[Neutrons vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[The detector emits two clicks:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Lead - grayish-yellow tile]
:[The emitter and pedestal are within their lead enclosure. The detector clicks once:] Click

:[Neutrons vs. Water - gray tile]
:[The emitter and pedestal are in the large glass of water. The detector makes no noise.]

:[Neutrons vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[The glass bell-jar covers the pedestalled emitter. The detector clicks twice:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[The emitter sits in the satellite's open hatch. Spacesuited Cueball's hand-held detector transmits two clicks:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Oven Mitts - yellow tile]
:[Megan wears oven gloves and covers the emitter, on its pedestal, with both hands. Cueball's detector clicks twice:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Armor - yellow tile]
:[Cueball has removed his armor’s helmet and placed it over the emitter. His detector clicks twice:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Cueball stands as normal, having draped his unworn biohazard suit over the emitter, leaving the hood on the floor. His detector sounds two clicks:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[Within his mesh cage, two clicks come from Cueball's detector:] Click Click

:[Neutrons vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Within a barred cage, the detector Cueball holds clicks twice:] Click Click

:[In all of the Alpha Particle boxes, it is a small spherical mass or flask with 'fizzy' strands or dashes, set in the same base scenarios as previously.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Air - gray tile]
:[Cueball is holding a detector and looking at it. The detector is doing nothing.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Lead - gray tile]
:[There is a lead wall between the alpha particle source and Cueball. Cueball's worn detector is doing nothing.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Water - gray tile]
:[The alpha particle item is stood in a large glass of water. Cueball is holding a detector and looking at it. The detector is doing nothing.]
:[Cueball:] Does this thing even work?

:[Alpha Particles vs. Glass - gray tile]
:[The source, on its table, is covered by a bell-jar. Cueball stands looking at it, wearing a detector that does nothing.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[The source of alpha particles is inside the open satellite hatch. Spacesuited Cueball floats nearby, with a detector that transmits three beeps:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Alpha Particles vs. Oven Mitts - gray tile]
:[Megan wears over mitts, placing one over the source on its table. Cueball looks ok, his worn detector doing nothing.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Armor - gray tile]
:[Cueball, in his full suit of armor, has picked up the source from its table and is holding it directly in his hand. There is no sign of any detector activity occuring.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - gray tile]
:[Cueball, wearing the bio-hazard suit, looks impassively at the source on the top of its table. There are no beeps.]

:[Alpha Particles vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[The table with the source has been moved to be right next to the mesh cage. Cueball, inside the cage, presses right up to the inside of the same mesh edge, putting his detector right next to it. There are three beeps:] Beep Beep Beep

:[Alpha Particles vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Again, the source, on its table, is right next to the bars of the cage. And, again, Cueball is pressed right up against (and perhaps through) the inside edge of the cage. Three beeps sound:] Beep Beep Beep

:[In all of the light boxes, Megan points a brightly lit battery torch towards Cueball.]

:[Light vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[Megan points the torch towards Cueball. Rays of lights splay out over Cueball's face as he instinctively holds one arm protectively over his eyes.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Light vs. Lead - gray tile]
:[Megan points the torch towards Cueball, but only illuminates a lead wall that stands between them. Cueball makes no reaction.]

:[Light vs. Water - grayish-yellow tile]
:[Megan stands nose-deep in the giant glass of water, aiming her shining torch out through the water and out of the glass towards Cueball. Cueball shields his eyes with his arm, but is silent.]

:[Light vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[Megan stands within a person-sized bell-jar, shining her torch towards Cueball, who is outside and shielding his eyes.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Light vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[Megan and Cueball, in spacesuits (i.e. with 'fishbowl helmets'), are seen orbiting high above the planet below. Megan holds a torch, shining it towards Cueball.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Light vs. Oven Mitts - gray tile]
:[Megan points her torch towards Cueball. Cueball wears oven-gloves, and casually holds one begloved hand over the end of the torch, from which no light is seen.]

:[Light vs. Armor - grey tile]
:[Megan shones her torch upon the armored figure of Cueball, whose helmet visor is down.]
:[Cueball:] Nope.

:[Light vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - grey tile]
:[Megan makes to point her torch at Cueball, who is dressed in all but the hood of his bio-hazard suit. He holds the hood out, fully covering Megan's torch.]

:[Light vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[The torch is pointed by Megan towards Cueball, arm across his eyes as he stands within in his mesh cage.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Light vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Megan's torch shines through the bars of the cage at Cueball, his arm protectively held up.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[In most of the sound boxes, Megan appears to be screaming in Cueball's direction.]

:[Sound vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[Cueball stands with his hands over his ears, as a tensed-up Megan lets out a loud scream.]
:[Megan:] AAAAAAAAA!

:[Sound vs. Lead - yellow tile]
:[Between Megan and Cueball is a full-height thick lead wall. Megan is tapping on her side.]
:[Megan:] Knock Knock
:[Cueball:] Who is it?

:[Sound vs. Water - yellow tile]
:[An underwater scene, showing sea-floor with various corals/sea-plants. Just above is a dolphin, projecting sound waves towards two small fish.]

:[Sound vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[Megan is stood within her person-sized bell-jar, screaming loudly. The bell-jar is vibrating. Cueball is covering his ears.]
:[Megan, in notably distorted text:] AAAAAAAA!

:[Sound vs. Vacuum - grey tile]
:[Megan and Cueball float in space, high above the planet. They are both wearing space helmets. An abortive speech-bubble emerges from Megan's helmet.]
:[Megan:] .....

:[Sound vs. Oven Mitts - greyish-yellow tile]
:[Megan stands to the left of Cueball, wearing oven-gloves. Her hands are over her mouth, muffling her attempts to say anything.]
:[Megan:] <two lines of unintelligble sounds>

:[Sound vs. Armor - yellow tile]
:[Megan is holding her hands over her ears. Cueball is wearing his suit of armor, which is vibrating, while he emits a large scream.]
:[Cueball:] AAAAAAAAA!

:[Sound vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Megan has her hands over her ears. Cueball is screaming from within his bio-hazard suit.]
:[Cueball:] AAAAAAAAA!

:[Sound vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[Megan is yelling at Cueball, standing within his mesh cage with his hands over his ears.]
:[Megan:] AAAAAAAA!

:[Sound vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Megan yells, as Cueball holds his hands over his ears behind the bars of the cage.]
:[Megan:] AAAAAAAA!

:[All of the fire boxes show a small campfire, or other more expansive flames. In all but one case, Cueball is present. In most of these instances, he is holding a marshmallow, sometimes at the end of a long stick.]

:[Heat vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[There is a campfire, with Cueball extending a stick-speared marshmallow over it.]

:[Heat vs. Lead - yellow tile]
:[A campfire has a lead slab propped up above it. Cueball's marshmallow-stick is being held to its upper surface.]
:[Marshmallow:] TSSSSS
:[Voice from off-panel:] NO!

:[Heat vs. Water - yellow tile]
:[A campfire heats a cauldron/cooking-pot held over it. Cueball dips his stick with a marshmallow into the container as splashes/vapor emerge. Megan stands behind Cueball.]
:[Cueball:] They're better boiled.
:[Megan:] NO!

:[Heat vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[With a campfire between them, Megan and Cueball stand with sticks in their hands, held close to the fire. Megan has speared her own marshmallow. Cueball holds something, that looks like a wine bottle, in a forked/looped end, a few small puffs of vapor emerging from open top of the bottle.]

:[Heat vs. Vacuum - greyish-yellow tile]
:[Surrounded by a general setting of flames, there appears to be a cross-section of a vacuum flask. The neck of the flask is plugged. The inside of the flask appears to be half full of liquid with some solid chunks floating in it.]
:[Arrowed label, pointing at the flask's chunks:] Ice

:[Heat vs. Oven Mitts - grey tile]
:[Megan and Cueball stand around the campfire, Megan holding her marshmallow-on-a-stick. Cueball is wearing oven gloves and, with one hand almost over the flames, is holding the handle of a frying pan that is actually in the flames. Something (possibly a marshmallow) seems to be sizzling in the pan.]

:[Heat vs. Armor - yellow tile]
:[Megan is holding her marshmallow stick over the campfire. Cueball is holding his marshmallow over the fire, directly in his gauntleted hand, as he wears the full armor.]
:[Cueball:] OW! OW!

:[Heat vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Around the campfire, Megan toasts her marshmallow normally. Cueball wears his biohazard suit, holding his gloved hand close to the flames whilst holding a marshmallow.]
:[Cueball:] Ow! Ow!

:[Heat vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[The campfire is built just to the left of the mesh cage, within which Cueball is standing.]
:[Cueball:] Mmm, warm.

:[Heat vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball's cage has a campfire just outside its bars.]
:[Cueball:] Mmm, warm.



:[In all of the sword boxes, Megan is thrusting a sword rightwards, towards/into Cueball, in this row. Cueball also holds a sword, in all but one case, but lowered and not in a defensive manner.]

:[Swords vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[Megan is poking Cueball with a sword.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Lead - gray tile]
:[Cueball is standing in a lead container as Megan hits her sword against the outside of it, making a metallic sound:] Clank

:[Swords vs. Water - yellow tile]
:[Cueball and Megan are both underwater, wearing diving gear. Megan is poking Cueball with her sword.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[Megan is standing in her person-sized bell jar; however, she has smashed a hole in the side and is now poking Cueball with her sword through the hole.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[Cueball and Megan are floating in space, wearing spacesuits. Megan is poking Cueball with her sword.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Oven Mitts - yellow tile]
:[Cueball stands next to Megan, wearing oven mitts. Megan is poking him with her sword.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Armor - gray tile]
:[Cueball is standing in a suit of armor next to Megan. She tries to poke him but cannot penetrate the armor, instead producing a metallic "clink"]
:[Cueball:] Ha!

:[Swords vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is wearing his biohazard suit as Megan pokes him with her sword.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing inside a person-sized Faraday cage as Megan pokes him with her sword through the mesh.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Swords vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing inside of a shark cage as Megan pokes him with her sword through the bars.]
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[In all of the tiles in the Toxic Dust row, clouds, and further particulate specks, illustrate the toxic dust, in several cases, apparently being discharged by a burning brazier. All tiles have Cueball in the scene.]

:[Toxic Dust vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing next to a container resembling a metal trash can, with flames visible on top and a cloud of smoke and particulates rising from the flames.]

:[Toxic Dust vs. Lead - grayish-yellow tile]
:[The burning trash can is encased in a rectangular lead box. Cueball is touching the outside of the lead box as a few particulates are coming off of it.]
:[Cueball:] This shield is also ''producing'' toxic dust.

:[Toxic Dust vs. Water - yellow tile]
:[Cueball and Megan are both standing (presumably) outside, watching as particulates hover in the air. There are a few clouds present as well.]
:[Cueball:] Don't worry, this will all be safely absorbed by the groundwater.

:[Toxic Dust vs. Glass - gray tile]
:[Cueball is standing in a person-sized bell jar as toxic dust floats around the outside of it.]

:[Toxic Dust vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is floating in space next to a satellite with an open hatch that is emitting toxic dust.]
:[Satellite:] Achoo!
:[Cueball:] My suit!

:[Toxic Dust vs. Oven Mitts - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing next to the burning trash can and covering his face with an oven-mitted hand.]
:[Cueball:] ''Cough''

:[Toxic Dust vs. Armor - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing next to the burning trash can in a suit of armor.]
:[Cueball:] ''Cough''

:[Toxic Dust vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - gray tile]
:[Cueball is standing next to the burning trash can while wearing his biohazard suit. He is unaffected by the toxic dust it is producing.]

:[Toxic Dust vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing next to the burning trash can in a person-sized Faraday cage.]
:[Cueball:] ''Cough''

:[Toxic Dust vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing in a shark cage next to the burning trash can.]
:[Cueball:] ''Cough''

:[Most tiles in the radio row depict Cueball carrying a two-way radio handset, except where the transceiver appears to be part of the various protective suits that he is wearing.]

:[Radio vs. Air - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is holding a handheld two-way radio in his right hand, close to his face, and speaking into it. A voice from the radio is responding to him.]
:[Cueball:] Eagle Base, come in.
:[Radio:] Go ahead.

:[Radio vs. Lead - gray tile
:[Cueball is standing inside a lead box, again holding the radio close to his face.]
:[Cueball:] Eagle Base, come in? Hello?

:[Radio vs. Water - gray tile]
:[Cueball is underwater, in a diving suit. He is once again holding a hand radio. Bubbles are rising from his helmet and a shark is swimming underneath him.]
:[Cueball:] Hello?

:[Radio vs. Glass - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing inside a person-sized bell jar, holding the radio close to his face.]
:[Cueball:] Is this... part of the mission?
:[Radio:] Sure.

:[Radio vs. Vacuum - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is floating in space next to the satellite. He is not visibly holding a radio, implying that it is integrated into his spacesuit.]
:[Cueball:] Eagle Base, I have the package.

:[Radio vs. Oven Mitts - yellow tile
:[Cueball is wearing oven mitts while holding the radio close to his face.]
:[Cueball:] Eagle Base, tactical mitts acquired.
:[Radio:] Copy that.

:[Radio vs. Armor - gray tile]
:[Cueball is standing in a suit of armor. He is not visibly holding a radio.]
:[Cueball:] Repeat that? My suit radio is having issues.

:[Radio vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is wearing his biohazard suit. He is not visibly holding a radio.]
:[Cueball: Copy that.]

:[Radio vs. Faraday Cage - gray tile
:[Cueball is standing inside a person-sized Faraday cage, holding the radio close to his face.]
:[Cueball:] Eagle Base? Come in?

:[Radio vs. Shark Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is standing in a shark cage, holding the radio close to his face.]
:[Cueball:] Eagle Base, why am I-
:[Radio:] Don't worry about it.

:[All tiles in the Shark row depict a shark, except when only the shark's fin is seen emerging from a body of water. Cueball is somehow present in each case.]

:[Sharks vs. Air - gray tile]
:[Cueball is standing on land next to a body of water. A shark fin is protruding from the surface of the water.]

:[Sharks vs. Lead - gray tile]
:[Cueball, wearing diving gear, is standing on the ocean floor in a person-sized lead container. A few small fish are swimming above and to the left of him and a shark is floating below the fish.]

:[Sharks vs. Water - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is again underwater, wearing diving gear. He is very close to a shark and seems to be pointing at it.]
:[Cueball:] Kitty!

:[Sharks vs. Glass - gray tile]
:[The shark is now in a water tank, behind a wall of glass. Cueball and Megan are standing next to the tank, looking at what is likely an informative plaque in front of it.]

:[Sharks vs. Vacuum - gray tile]
:[Cueball is floating in space. Earth is visible in the background, with a shark fin visibly protruding from a body of water.]

:[Sharks vs. Oven Mitts - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is underwater, wearing diving gear and oven mitts, he gently touches the shark's snout.]
:[Cueball:] ''Boop!''

:[Sharks vs. Armor - grayish-yellow tile]
:[Cueball is underwater, now wearing a suit of armor. The shark appears to be biting his armored right hand.]
:[Shark:] cronch cronch
:[Cueball:] Ow.

:[Sharks vs. Bio-Hazard Suit - yellow tile]
:[Cueball, underwater and wearing his biohazard suit, is now petting the shark on its snout.]
:[Cueball:] Good kitty!

:[Sharks vs. Faraday Cage - yellow tile]
:[Cueball is inside an underwater Faraday cage, which is suspended by a tether going straight up. The shark is in the process of tearing apart the cage.]
:[Cueball:] ''No! Bad kitty!''

:[Sharks vs. Shark Cage - gray tile]
:[Cueball is underwater, in a shark cage suspended from one side by a tether going straight up. The shark is swimming a short distance away from the cage.]

{{comic discussion}}<noinclude>
[[Category:Confusion matrices]]
[[Category:Sharks]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics with color]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]

735: Floor

2026-05-25T18:51:49Z

FaviFake: where is he?

{{comic
| number = 735
| date = May 3, 2010
| title = Floor
| image = floor.png
| titletext = We once got grounded when we convinced the FAA to block flights through our county because of ash clouds.
}}

==Explanation==
{{w|Hot lava (game)|The floor is lava}} is a game many kids play where they pretend the floor is {{w|lava}}, meaning that they can't step on it or else they'll get 'burned'. In this comic, the three kids are taking this game too seriously (and in a nerdy way), causing great damage to the house with what appears to be a garden hose and some dynamite. Stopping a lava flow by diverting it into an artificial trench or cooling the flow with (sea)water are both tactics that have been used in the past [https://www.usgs.gov/observatories/hvo/news/volcano-watch-can-hawaiian-lava-flows-be-diverted with varying success].

Of course, it is unknown where exactly the kids got the dynamite from, given from the explosion it sounds as if the dynamite was real, unlike the fictitious lava it's 'saving' the house from. Dynamite is not a common feature in most houses.{{cn}}

The title text refers to events like the 2010 eruptions at {{w|Eyjafjallajökull}}, the ash clouds of which caused the shutdown of most of Europe's {{w|IFR}} airspace. The first joke there is that grounding a child often means to consign them to their bedroom for a set period of hours (as a punishment), whereas grounding a plane means to disallow any use of that plane for an extended period of time. The most notable example of this is {{w|Concorde}}, which has been indefinitely grounded. The second joke is that causing panic and diverting a large number of flights would cause lots of financial damage, and would normally be subject to more punishment than simply giving the kids a time-out.

==Transcript==
:[Three Cueball-like kids are in a living room. Furniture and other things are knocked over, broken, or tilted. The first kid is holding a handle of a plunger with cables going offscreen.]
:First Kid: I've dynamited a trench through the kitchen to divert flow!
:'''BOOM'''

:[The second kid is aiming a hose at the floor.]
:Second Kid: More hoses! We need to cool and solidify the surface layer!
:''FWOOSH''

:[The third kid is standing on a chair, using a cell phone or radio.]
:Third Kid: Where are the damn helicopters?

:[Caption beneath the panel:]
:Like many kids, we sometimes pretended the floor was lava.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Volcanoes]]
[[Category:Comics featuring children]]

User talk:FaviFake

2026-05-25T18:50:21Z

FaviFake: /* "never reply again" */

User:FaviFake

2026-05-15T16:27:49Z

FaviFake:

<small>Score: {{#cscore:FaviFake|score}} ({{#cscore:FaviFake|pages}} pages edited and {{#cscore:FaviFake|changes}} total edits)</small>

{{notice|<big>Since Randall answered my latest questions, I sent him another list of questions, but he hasn't replied as of 24/1/26</big>}}
{{notice|<big>I don't think he'll ever reply again :(</big>}}
'''Hey everyone! I got in touch with [[Randall Munroe]] himself!! Here's what you need to know.'''

<big>{{TOC}}</big>I emailed him to ask for the official release date of [[36: Scientists]] (see [[36: Scientists#Trivia|the trivia for more info]]). Surprisingly, he got back to me! You can read the full conversation below. I'll keep you posted if I receive more messages! You can [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=User:FaviFake&action=watch add this page to your watchlist] to keep track of it. I haven't received his explicit permission to feature his messages in full, so initially i hid his messages. I've now published the contents of his emails, since he hasn't responded to my request to make them public. My emails have not been altered, but in the copy-pasting, links have been removed. These emails were all hyperlinked, I now added back only a few links.

In his second email, Randall expressed willingness to answer a few more questions, particularly simpler, administrative questions (like the one he answered already), but kindly explained he prefers to avoid too much meta-commentary. Because I didn't want to come up with every question and I wanted to hear everyone, I'll try to send him some that you want, if he agrees to receiving more! You can [[#Your suggestions! What should I ask next?|add your suggestions here!]].

Even if he doesn't answer all these questions, we could also use this page for other things. I'm also planning to create a page on this wiki containing '''everything''' we don't know about xkcd, using these questions. '''So, keep posting your questions!''' In the future, this could become:

*A list of everything we can research extremely in-depth, if someone wants to help the wiki that way.

*A list of quick questions to ask him when someone meets him in person, at a book tour for example.

*A page for people who want to read about things we don't know and is interested in xkcd mysteries.

<span style="background-color:#9eff9e;"><span font-size:1.4em;">'''<big><big>  [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title{{=}}User:FaviFake&action{{=}}edit&section{{=}}2 CLICK HERE TO ADD NEW QUESTION''' (scroll to bottom)]
</big></big></span>

==Email thread==
<div class="plainlinks">
{| class="wikitable"
!Question from the Explain xkcd wiki regarding one of your comics
|-
|Email thread - 4 messages — Here's a [https://imgur.com/a/2StTkvJ screenshot of one of the emails], if you need some sort of proof.
|}

{| class="wikitable"
|'''FaviFake''' <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
!14 February 2025 at 19:16 CET
|-
| colspan="2" |To: Randall Munroe <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |

Hi,
I'm an editor at explainxkcd.com, which you probably know is the wiki that explains all your comics and provides as much info as possible on them.

In pursuit of that goal, we have always had an unsolved mystery only you can solve. Comic [[36: Scientists]] was originally posted as a duplicate of comic [[10: Pi Equals]]. You corrected this sometime between April 23, 2006 and July 5, 2006 , when the current version showed up in the web archive (see the two links). The comic looks like one of your old drawings.

So, explain xkcd thinks that when you realized your mistake (over three months after it was originally posted), you probably found an old unused drawing and posted it, to not make it stand out compared to the other comics from that time. This all means we have no date for this comic, since it could've been posted anytime between the two dates mentioned above. You can read more about this here. (If you're interested, we have a more comprehensive history of your webcomic here.)

Could you kindly help us figure this out by checking when you released comic #[[36]], so we can add an official date to it? This is one of the only official comics which we don't know the date of.

Kind regards,<br>FaviFake<br>editor @ explain xkcd
|}
''[In the copy-pasting, links have been removed. These emails were all hyperlinked, I now added back only a few links.]''
{| class="wikitable"
|'''Randall Munroe''' [Randall's email redacted]
!14 February 2025 at 22:20 CET
|-
| colspan="2" |To: FaviFake <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |
FaviFake,

I had totally forgotten about this! Checking my logs, I believe I swapped it in on April 28th.

Thank you for your tireless documentation effort :)

Warmest wishes,<br>Randall
|}
{| class="wikitable"
|'''FaviFake''' <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
!15 February 2025 at 17:39 CET
|-
| colspan="2" |To: Randall Munroe <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |Hello Randall,

Thank you so much for your response!! I'm certain the rest of the community will be thrilled to have an official answer.

Unfortunately, this is by far not the only "unsolved mystery" we have encountered in our research of your comic. Because we don't get to talk to you very often, I'd like to ask you if you can answer more of our many questions, if you're up for it. Of course, I do not want to annoy you or waste your time, so please let me know if this is something you'd enjoy! I will try to keep the questions entertaining for you.

Kind regards,<br>FaviFake
|}
{| class="wikitable"
|'''Randall Munroe''' <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
!17 February 2025 at 19:02 CET
|-
| colspan="2" |To: FaviFake <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |FaviFake,

You're welcome to send over questions, although I can't promise any answers so please don't put too much time into it!

I've always tried to resist the temptation to do too much explaining or meta-commentary in general, partly because once you start breaking the fourth wall, it can be hard to stop, and partly because I've found those boundaries are helpful for keeping me focused.

But if you want to send over some of your questions, I can see if there are at least a few of them that I can answer—at least some of the simpler, more administrative ones.

And seriously, my heartfelt thanks to you and everyone there. It's such a privilege to make something that people think is worth so much effort to explain <3

—Randall
|}

{| class="wikitable"
|'''FaviFake''' <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
!20 February 2025 at 18:07
|-
| colspan="2" |To: Randall Munroe <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |Randall,

Thank you for the kind words!! I really appreciate the offer. Next time, I'm thinking of asking the community for other simple and administrative questions, because I'm sure I don't represent everyone.

(Also, would it be okay to feature your responses on our wiki?)

I had drafted the paragraphs below in advance and I'm not sure if they fall outside the boundaries you mentioned, but I figured I’d ask anyway since this is a topic the other editors are very curious about. Of course, no worries if you’d rather not get into the details! We have plenty of simpler questions we can't answer ourselves. Here you go:

On June 17, 2009, you released [[Conservation]] (along with IBM's accompanying blog post), the first comic created with IBM for their "A Smarter Planet" blog. You used the filename conservation.png, as usual. On August 11, 2009, the second comic of the series, [[Prescriptions]], was released (with its blog post), but this time you used an unusual filename: ibm_hc_1.png.

We initially believed these were the only comics you created, mainly because they were the only ones featured on your page xkcd.com/asmarterplanet, but a little over a month ago we discovered two additional never-before-seen comics by experimenting with the image URLs for [[ibm_hc_2]].png and [[ibm_hc_3]].png. We believe you created these two comics as part of the IBM partnership, but for some reason they were never released publicly and were only accessible from imgs.xkcd.com. (Interestingly enough, they are still available!)

Any additional info you can give us would help a ton! For example: their titles, when they were drawn or supposed to be released, or why they were never officially published. Thank you!

—FaviFake
|}

''I wanted to also hear what ''you'' wanted to ask! Randall asked for simpler, administrative questions (like the one he answered), and not ones that required too much explaining. Please add your suggestions to the section below! If you have thoughts, [[User talk:FaviFake#Contacting Randall Munroe|send them to me on my talk page]]!''

''Since I still hadn't heard back, I sent another email with a few of the quickest and smaller questions below.]''

{| class="wikitable"
|'''FaviFake''' <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
!13 March 2025 at 19:40
|-
| colspan="2" |To: Randall Munroe <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |Hello Randall,

Hope you're doing well! I'm just following up since it’s been a little while.

In the meantime, we gathered some simpler and more administrative questions from the community—ones that might be easier to answer than the previous one. Below are just a few of them—let me know if you'd be up for answering any!

*When did you release [[Blue Eyes]]: The Hardest Login Puzzle in the World? This is one of the comics that don't have a confirmed release date.

*In comic [[1572: xkcd Survey]], you published a Google Form and said that "everyone's responses will be posted [...] to create an interesting data set for people to play with". However, due to the large number of responses, you encountered technical problems and didn't release the results. Could you confirm the reason for the delay and whether we should expect to see the responses in the future?

*Up until comic #[[1674]], you provided official transcripts for new comics in the JSON interface. In 2016, you stopped. Could you explain why?

*What was/is the purpose of pages such as xkcd.com/yes, xkcd.com/burlap, xkcd.com/dot, and [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/explain_xkcd:Community_portal/Proposals#List_of_pages others]?

Thanks again for your time, and no worries if you’re too busy! We truly appreciate any insights you can share.

Kind regards,<br>FaviFake
|}
Four months after my last email, '''HE REPLIED!'''
{| class="wikitable"
|'''Randall Munroe''' <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
! 9 July 2025 at 13:34
|-
| colspan="2" |To: FaviFake <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |
FaviFake,

Sorry for the extremely long delay here, but I wanted to send you replies to some of these! <blockquote><span style="color:#500050;">In the meantime, we gathered some simpler and more administrative questions from the community—ones that might be easier to answer than the previous one. Below are just a few of them—let me know if you'd be up for answering any!</span>
<blockquote><div style="color:#500050;">On June 17, 2009, you released [[Conservation]] (along with IBM's accompanying blog post), the first comic created with IBM for their "A Smarter Planet" blog. You used the filename conservation.png, as usual. On August 11, 2009, the second comic of the series, [[Prescriptions]], was released (with its blog post), but this time you used an unusual filename: ibm_hc_1.png.

We initially believed these were the only comics you created, mainly because they were the only ones featured on your page xkcd.com/asmarterplanet, but a little over a month ago we discovered two additional never-before-seen comics by experimenting with the image URLs for [[ibm_hc_2]].png and [[ibm_hc_3]].png. We believe you created these two comics as part of the IBM partnership, but for some reason they were never released publicly and were only accessible from imgs.xkcd.com. (Interestingly enough, they are still available!)</div>
</blockquote></blockquote>

I had forgotten about these! These were other draft comics I drew for the project, and I put them in that folder to transfer them, but IIRC the project involved a lot of organizational moving parts, and for administrative reasons those comics didn't end up getting published. I believe I never gave them titles.<blockquote>
* <span style="color:#500050;">When did you release Blue Eyes: The Hardest Login Puzzle in the World? This is one of the comics that don't have a confirmed release date.</span>
</blockquote>Unfortunately, I don't have an easy way to answer that one!<blockquote>
* <span style="color:#500050;">In comic [[1572: xkcd Survey]], you published a Google Form and said that "everyone's responses will be posted [...] to create an interesting data set for people to play with". However, due to the large number of responses, you encountered technical problems and didn't release the results. Could you confirm the reason for the delay and whether we should expect to see the responses in the future?</span>
</blockquote>Haha, I got a fun message from the Google Forms administrators that day. Apparently they were in the middle of updating to a new system on the day I posted the comic, and I provided an extremely unexpected—and profoundly unwelcome—load test. But they were very nice about it and we eventually managed to recover most of the data.<br>
I haven't found a way to release it that I'm comfortable with. I tried to ask about frivolous stuff that wouldn't provide easy fodder for shoddy social science, but I found that for almost any correlation pair in the dataset, you could immediately project a half dozen intriguing, serious, and contradictory theories onto the data. People were incredibly thoughtful and detailed in their responses to my silly questions, which made me want to be very careful with how I used their data. I still might find a way to release selections from it, because it's a fascinating dataset, but only if I'm confident that I'm not enabling bad science or betraying anyone's trust.<blockquote>
* <span style="color:#500050;">Up until comic #1674, you provided official transcripts for new comics in the JSON interface. In 2016, you stopped. Could you explain why?</span>
</blockquote>The transcripts were initially submitted by readers through Ryan North's OhNoRobot project, moderated and edited by some friends of mine through a custom system they set up. They eventually ended up often simply writing the transcripts themselves. It ended up being a lot of work to ask of volunteers, and eventually infrastructure updates were needed while the people involved were busy with other things, so I let them stop updating rather than trying to recruit more people.<br>
I'd love to start offering transcripts again, and hope to do so at some point soon, hopefully in a way that indicates they're from a third party without creating too much spam potential. As I'm sure you know from doing transcripts on the wiki, translating a comic to text can involve a lot of additional creative decisions—it's a different medium, after all!—so I want to make them available for accessibility while ideally clarifying that they're written from the point of view of a reader, to avoid making readers feel like they NEED to read both versions to see everything that I meant to include!<blockquote>
* <span style="color:#500050;">What was/is the purpose of pages such as [https://xkcd.com/yes xkcd.com/yes], [https://xkcd.com/burlap xkcd.com/burlap], [https://xkcd.com/dot xkcd.com/dot], and [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#List of pages|others]]?</span>
</blockquote>Most of those were inside jokes sent to friends, but [https://xkcd.com/dot xkcd.com/dot] is an improvised migraine test! Since I was a kid, I've occasionally gotten the type of migraine that starts with blind spots in the vision. They can be hard to tell apart from sun glare at first, but I found I could tell whether I was having one by looking at a blinking dot to see if it disappeared—which would tell me I needed to take painkillers ASAP. I made that gif and put it on my website for easy access from wherever I was at the time. Thankfully, the migraines have gotten less frequent over the years, but I still have to use that page occasionally.

I hope that's helpful!

Best wishes,<br>Randall
|}

I replied:
{| class="wikitable"
|'''FaviFake''' <[email redacted]@gmail.com>
!3 September 2025 at 11:13
|-
| colspan="2" |To: Randall Munroe <[Randall's email redacted]@gmail.com>
|-
| colspan="2" |Randall,

Thanks so much for responding to these! We've already added them to the wiki. I also apologise for taking so long to reply; I seem to be exceptionally skilled at involuntary procrastination.

You didn’t explicitly say you wanted more questions, but I'll risk asking anyway :)

1. Before xkcd.com, you posted your comics on LiveJournal. When you launched xkcd.com, you uploaded the backlog of 41 comics from LiveJournal in a seemingly random order. Was there a reason for this? For example, did you intentionally assign number 7 to your first comic, Girl sleeping, and number 1 to your fifth comic, Barrel - Part 1?

2. Why was the xkcd warning removed? Four hours after comic Earth Temperature Timeline was released, the warning and footnote disappeared. A new footnote appeared three weeks later, but the warning never came back. We speculated it was related to the comic's sudden surge in popularity, but we're not sure why it wasn't reinstated.

3. The old LiveJournal caption for comic Godel, Escher, Kurt Halsey mentioned other comics in the series. Unfortunately, the image and link to the "full series" weren’t archived. Is there more to this comic than what’s now available, or was the LiveJournal version simply an excerpt?

4. Three years ago, Matthew Smoot said that the xkcd store was "closed indefinitely due to supply chain issues", but recently it was announced that it will be opening soon! What happened?

Thank you again for your time and generosity!

Kind regards,<br>FaviFake
|}

I'll update this page if he responds.

==Your suggestions! What should I ask next?==
Remember, he said only simple questions. I'm assuming he'd like questions similar to the ones he replied to (short, sweet, no explaining needed), or questions that shouldn't require him to explain his comic too much. '''What's something relatively important that we don't know and that only Randall can answer?'''{{notice|<big>I don't think he'll ever reply again :(</big>}}

{{Done}}'''[[ibm_hc_2]] and [[ibm_hc_3]] (newly-discovered comics) and comic [[36: Scientists]]''' --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:34, 21 February 2025 (UTC)
:I asked this one already, because I assume it's the most important one right now. You can [[#Email thread|see my question above]].

{{Done}} '''Why were the first comics [[LiveJournal|uploaded seemingly at random]]? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:51, 22 February 2025 (UTC)
:Initially, randall posted his comics to LiveJournal ([[LiveJournal|learn more here]]). The new xkcd website opened on January 1, 2006, and the backlog of 41 comics from LiveJournal from [[1: Barrel - Part 1]] to [[44: Love]] was transferred on the same day, but in a completely different order. The only comic that has the same number on both sites is [[3: Island (sketch)]], while all the other comics were uploaded seemingly at random. Also, only eleven of the original comic titles were reused of the new site, and even among the last eleven comics posted on both sites, only six used the same title.

{{Done}}'''When was [[Blue Eyes]] released? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 11:01, 23 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:[[xkcd]]'s [[Blue Eyes]] puzzle is a logic puzzle posted around the same time as comic [[169: Words that End in GRY]]. [[Randall]] calls it "The Hardest Logic Puzzle in the World" on its page, but whether it really is the hardest is up to speculation. This is incorrect, as the comic was available long before October 11, 2006. The earliest date we have is [https://web.archive.org/web/20041024201125/http://68.57.186.221:8080/ October 24th, 2004] (see fourth link on the page), and the earliest version of the comic is from [https://web.archive.org/web/20041109034300/http://68.57.186.221:8080/blue_eyes.html November 4th, 2004]. Additionally, both the puzzle [https://xkcd.com/solution.html and the solution] (here's an [https://web.archive.org/web/20061102070433/https://xkcd.com/solution.html earlier version of the solution])were modified and updated several times since its release.

{{Done}}'''What happened to the transcripts in the JSON interface? --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:38, 23 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:On the [https://xkcd.com/about/ about] page of xkcd there is a description of where:
Is there an interface for automated systems to access comics and metadata?
:Read more here [[Transcript]]. And on this page there is a [[Transcript#End%20of%20transcripts|description]] about how the json info got messed up after [[1608: Hoverboard]] and how they completely ended after [[1677: Contrails]] which had the transcript of [[1674: Adult]].
:I would like to know if he noticed the messed up order of the transcript and if that was why he choose to end it completely? --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:38, 23 February 2025 (UTC)
::This imo is one the best questions we've gotten! Very technical and doesn't require him to explain any of his comics! Thanks [[User:Kynde|Kynde]]! Do you have more questions like this one? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)
:::Thanks. I was frustrated about this at some time. Not any other questions right now of this kind. --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 13:54, 26 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Why has there not been any new what if since comet ice? --[[Special:Contributions/162.158.41.44|162.158.41.44]] 17:14, 24 February 2025 (UTC)'''
::Don't really see why we need to ask him this, A. This isn't related to the wiki, and B. They wanted short, administrative questions [[Special:Contributions/172.71.30.168|172.71.30.168]] 17:26, 24 February 2025 (UTC)
:::I kinda like this one! A: I think it's partially relevant, we have [[what if? (blog)#Release schedule|and entire section dedicated]] to analysing the release schedule of new articles. B. That's true, but at least it's shorter than most other ones. Not a terrible question imo. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)
::::I feel like the answer would either be unsatisfying, or unsurprising. Releasing too many articles may disincentivize people from buying the books, the YouTube page is better marketing, people aren't asking interesting questions, the increased popularity of the article has led to too many questions being asked and it becomes increasingly unfair to answer one over the other. There's a possible litany of reasons without considering other more personal reasons that Randall may not want to share. Also, (and this is my completely unfair opinion) I personally feel like any question asking "why?" is meta-commentary and out of scope. It also feels like entitlement when you ask why someone isn't giving you even more stuff for free. [[Special:Contributions/172.69.23.94|172.69.23.94]] 19:25, 3 March 2025 (UTC)
:::::Yeah no you're right. Btw, the first part of your answer is great, you should consider adding it to the blog page! (or I can do if you don't mind) [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 19:47, 3 March 2025 (UTC)
::::::Thank you! I don't mind you adding it, but I also don't want to burden you with it. I'll look the page over and see where it might fit. I appreciate you fielding the brunt of the community in this matter! [[Special:Contributions/172.69.22.57|172.69.22.57]] 21:16, 3 March 2025 (UTC)
:::::::Since you didn't add it, [[what if? (blog)#Sporadic releases|I did]]! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:47, 23 March 2025 (UTC)

:::::::It's because the email that the ''What If?'' suggestions go to is wrong. [[User:B_for_brain|B for brain]] ([[User_talk:B_for_brain|talk]]) ([https://www.youtube.com/@bforbrain youtube channel] [https://bforbrain.weebly.com/ wobsite (supposed to be a blag)]) 18:24, 20 March 2025 (UTC)
::::::::Wait what? Please explain, I didn't know about this! What do you mean? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:00, 20 March 2025 (UTC)
:::::::::Try submitting a "What if?" suggestion yourself – you'll get an email from whatever email service you use saying that the email "Doesn't exist". [[User:B_for_brain|B for brain]] ([[User_talk:B_for_brain|talk]]) ([https://www.youtube.com/@bforbrain youtube channel] [https://bforbrain.weebly.com/ wobsite (supposed to be a blag)]) 17:35, 24 March 2025 (UTC)
::::::::::Thanks! I didn't know about this. I'll add an incomplete notice. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 17:41, 24 March 2025 (UTC)

'''Why has the [[Blag]] stopped.? --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 14:11, 26 February 2025 (UTC)
:Seemed like it was a good place to write extra info, but it has been removed from the links on the front page 2023 even though the [https://blog.xkcd.com/ page] still exist.

'''Do you read explainxkcd.com? --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.174.146|172.68.174.146]] 19:01, 27 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:We've probably all wondered: Does he ever read the wiki? if so, there are many directions this could go. Like: Has he ever posted anonymously (this could be asked without necessarily identifying which posts were his)? Ever find a explanation and laugh at how wrong it was? Ever find a explanation that had a funnier interpretation then he intended?
::Discuss it and vote - I doubt that counts as "administrative" but by not referencing any particular comic, we definitely avoid the "questions shouldn't require him to explain his comic more than he has already done." part. Anyway, feel free to reword/add parts/delete parts/hack the question up in whatever way you want. Consider this just me posting the idea for a question, and letting you guys do whatever you want with the idea --[[Special:Contributions/172.68.174.146|172.68.174.146]] 19:01, 27 February 2025 (UTC)
:::I do not think we should ask this. He has at least once referred to explain xkcd, so he do know of it. But I think that for his own sake, he stays clear of it as best as he can. ;-) -- [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 19:20, 10 March 2025 (UTC)

{{Done}} '''[[24]]'s original caption claimed to have more to it, but the link isn't archived. Is there more? [[user talk:lett‪herebedarklight|youtu.be/miLcaqq2Zpk]] 01:23, 4 March 2025 (UTC)'''
::I wonder if he'd want to talk about it, since he's now deleted his LiveJournal reply regarding the broken link. But would be easy to answer if there wasn't more. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:08, 4 March 2025 (UTC)

'''In [[2256: Bad Map Projection: South America]], which eleven islands are representing what I assume are the Philippines and Indonesia? --[[Special:Contributions/104.23.187.145|104.23.187.145]] 13:45, 1 March 2025 (UTC)'''
:Luzon, Samar, Mindanao, Sumatra, Java, Borneo, Sulawesi, and New Guinea seem pretty obvious, but what are the other three islands?

'''In [[2951: Bad Map Projection: Exterior Kansas]], assuming you didn't draw the map freehand, what function did you use to convert (actual distance from center point) to (distance from center point in the projection)? --[[Special:Contributions/104.23.187.145|104.23.187.145]] 13:45, 1 March 2025 (UTC)'''
:This information would be helpful for adding more states, territories, countries, and/or landmasses to the map.

'''Does he know that if a=1,b=2,c=3, etc. then x+k+c+d=42?[[User:Thehydraclone|Thehydraclone]] ([[User talk:Thehydraclone|talk]]) 19:49, 2 March 2025 (UTC)'''
:(Answer to life, the universe, and everything)
::[https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php/xkcd#:~:text=However%2C%20according%20to%20Randall%20himself%2C%20this%20is%20a%20coincidence This might be relevant], if you can find a citation for it...
::Not very important question but very easy to answer and trivial, i like it. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:59, 3 March 2025 (UTC)
:::But I think this has already been debated wildly and he has explained why he chose this name extensively, and it seems like it was not for that reason. I find it very interesting though, but it also only works for English alfabet, in Denmark we do not use W when saying the alfabet (although we have it for loan words. We also call it Weekend in Denmark. That is an official Danish word). But the X would thus be one less and the sum 41 ;-) I do realize that he of course would have used the English alfabet, so if he actually looked for this he would also get 42. -- [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 19:20, 10 March 2025 (UTC)

'''There's a hidden search box in [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com]'s source code. --[[User:Bytesizeinfo.com|Bytesizeinfo.com]]'''
:It's commented out, but you can reenable it with your browser's inspect tool, and it still seems to work. (It's in the footer, if you want to try.) Why is it commented out? It seems like a useful tool.
::Interesting! I had noticed it was there on older archives but didn't know it was just commented out. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:08, 4 March 2025 (UTC)

{{Done}}'''What was/is the purpose of https://xkcd.com/yes/ and https://xkcd.com/no/? [[user talk:lett‪herebedarklight|youtu.be/miLcaqq2Zpk]] 03:32, 5 March 2025 (UTC)'''
::Wait what? I've never seen these pages before! Are there any others? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 21:30, 8 March 2025 (UTC)
:::When I learnt of them, I tried various others (e.g. ".../maybe"), to no avail. But maybe there's something non-Yes/Noish that goes along with those two, thematically. So far, though, I've not worked out what they might be. [[Special:Contributions/162.158.33.252|162.158.33.252]] 00:08, 9 March 2025 (UTC)
::::I looked into it! There are other pages, but the xkcd forum link is broken and not archived. (See more info on the two pages, i just created, [[NO]] and [[YES]].) --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 12:33, 9 March 2025 (UTC)

{{Done}}'''Are results from the [[xkcd Survey]] ever going to be released? --[[Special:Contributions/172.71.254.92|172.71.254.92]] 01:53, 9 March 2025 (UTC)'''
:In xkcd.com/[[1572]] there was a survey. Randall said that he would release the data, but it crashed google forms. Is there any way to get it back, and if so, will he finally release it?
::Interesting! I didn't know. Very good question, thanks! --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 12:33, 9 March 2025 (UTC)

'''Did you know that the chatroom in [[xkcloud]]; euphoria.io is living and growing under a new domain, leet.nu? [[User:Elaine Roberts|Elaine Roberts]] ([[User talk:Elaine Roberts|talk]]) 19:21, 11 March 2025 (UTC)'''

'''What checkmate did you intend to depict in [[1112: Think Logically]]?''' [[Special:Contributions/162.158.167.40|162.158.167.40]] 07:04, 10 March 2025 (UTC)
:We suspect scholar's mate, but there is at least one other possibility, specifically a variant of fool's mate (since Cueball could be moving his pawns towards Knit Cap Guy's king).
::Did he really choose to depict a specific strategy? Is the assumption based on the board pieces at the end, or on the number of moves, or both? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:11, 10 March 2025 (UTC)

'''Is the board setup in [[3045: AlphaMove]] based on playing AlphaMove against a specific chess engine? If so, which one?''' -unsigned!
::Can you elaborate? What's a board setup, what dow e exactly not know? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:14, 11 March 2025 (UTC)
:::Seems to me, it simply means "has that playing position (i.e. the current state) been reached by pitting 'the algorithm' vs. any particular ''genuine'' chess-engine". (Or otherwise. The alternative, presumably, that it was a 'hand-crafted' response on Randall's part... Or possibly a volunteer from amongst his acquaintances, either knowing something of what they'd be pitted against or not.)
:::I suspect the answer will be frightfully unremarkable (if available ''and'' given), but I could also see it being a useful throw-it-in. (Better than [[4: Landscape (sketch)|"why's there a river running through the ocean?"]], anyway ;) ) [[Special:Contributions/141.101.99.163|141.101.99.163]] 16:49, 11 March 2025 (UTC)
::::Ah gotcha. Doesn't seem interesting imo but is small enough. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:22, 12 March 2025 (UTC)

'''Machine details -- [[User:HyperBirbN3rd|HyperBirbN3rd]]'''
:Is [[Machine]] going to have a finalized state? If so, when?
::Not sure this is easy enough to answer. He'd have to explain his intentions, which i don't think he published --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Does the hexadecimal "pointers" in [[138: Pointers]] mean anything?--[[User:Bb777|me, hi]] ([[User talk:Bb777|talk]]) 18:07, 29 March 2025 (UTC)'''

'''Why did you rename comic #[[786]]'s image to ''exoplanets_2010.png'' instead of uploading comic #[[1071]]'s image as ''exoplanets_2012.png''?''' --[[User:Winter1760|Winter1760]] ([[User talk:Winter1760|talk]]) 17:11, 5 April 2025 (UTC)
:Is [[2638: Extended NFPA Hazard Diamond]] supposed to represent anything at all? [[User:Bb777|me, hi]] ([[User talk:Bb777|talk]]) 17:57, 5 April 2025 (UTC)

'''Why were the xkcd [[Forums]] shut down for good? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 07:25, 22 July 2025 (UTC)'''

'''What was/is the purpose of the [[explain xkcd:Community portal/Proposals#List of pages|other pages we found]]? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:46, 22 July 2025 (UTC)'''


<span style="background-color:#9eff9e;"><span font-size:1.4em;">'''<big><big>  [https://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title{{=}}User:FaviFake&action{{=}}edit&section{{=}}2 CLICK HERE TO ADD NEW QUESTION''' (scroll to bottom)]
</big></big></span>
----

===Out-of-scope questions===
{{notice|<big><big>These questions are more like interview questions.</big></big><br>He said he'd answer simple questions. I'm assuming he'd like questions similar to the one he replied to (short, sweet,<br>no explaining needed), or questions that shouldn't require him to explain his comic more than he has already done.}}

'''Why was what if? article ''[https://web.archive.org/web/20161205191559/http://what-if.xkcd.com/153 Peptides] deleted?'' --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:34, 21 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:[[what if? (blog)]] is a blog written by [[Randall]] with entries posted occasionally. On December 5, 2016, the article ''[https://web.archive.org/web/20161205191559/http://what-if.xkcd.com/153 Peptides]'' was published as number {{what if|153|153}}. However, it was [https://web.archive.org/web/20161206171630/http://what-if.xkcd.com/153/ removed the following day] and was replaced by a notice: "''Whoops. This article is still in progress. An early draft was unintentionally posted here thanks to Randall's <b>[http://xkcd.com/1597/ troubled approach to git]</b>, and it took a little bit to get everything sorted out and rolled back. Sorry for the mixup!"''. No finished version of the article was ever published, and the URL was later reused for ''{{what if|153|Hide the Atmosphere}}''.
::I this this one is very interesting, but it might not be as administrative and short as Randall wants. He'd need to explain the reason why it wasn't published and why it looks like a complete article, not a "draft". Anyone agree? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:34, 21 February 2025 (UTC)
:::Copy paste from my reply below which I wrote first: "I'm not quite sure he likes questions about things he actually wished to delete... I mean seriously he tried to hide it but we got hold of it anyway?" --[[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:26, 23 February 2025 (UTC)
::::Yeah you're right, I didn't think about that --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''What happened to [[Five-Minute Comics: Part 4]]? --[[User:CalibansCreations|'''<span style="color:#ff0000;">Caliban</span>''']] ([[User talk:CalibansCreations|talk]]) 17:49, 22 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:A lost xkcd comic. He accidentally posted this instead of [[940]], and then erased all evidence of its existence by redirecting the direct image URL to a notice claiming it was a minor glitch in the universe. I'd get deleting the image outright, but just replacing it with what is essentially a sign to stop looking for it? Kinda weird. Also, how many more of these 5MCs has he made that are potentially lost media?
::I like this one, but I'm not sure if it's as simple as he'd like. He'd need to explain why he created the comic, which he almost never does. But there might be a way to ask it in a way that allows him to reply without revealing too much info. Btw, you seem very active on this wiki, do you have anything else in mind? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:11, 22 February 2025 (UTC)
:::I'm not quite sure he likes questions about things he actually wished to delete... I mean seriously he tried to hide it but we got hold of it anyway? Also we know why he drew these, it was a game he played with family. He just did not mean to post the fourth one. There might be more, but he only posted the three because he could not cope with the cancer of his wife and did not whish to give up his schedule. So as he could not draw three comics fast enough for that week he used these instead. Asking into this would also remind him of his wife's cancer. I vote no to this as an e-mail to Randall! [[User:Kynde|Kynde]] ([[User talk:Kynde|talk]]) 17:24, 23 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Why was [[No One Was Hurt]] replaced? [[Special:Contributions/172.68.71.112|172.68.71.112]] 15:44, 24 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:[[No One Was Hurt]] was a comic that was replaced by Comic 2642, and while it's reasonable to assume that it's probably in response to some... unfortunate irl events, for documentation it would be nice to have an official, confirmed answer
::I'm not sure he'd like it, after all, he deleted it, so he might not want to talk about it more --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Will we get more 5-part sagas? --[[User:CalibansCreations|'''<span style="color:#ff0000;">Caliban</span>''']] ([[User talk:CalibansCreations|talk]]) 11:44, 23 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:Like [[Choices]], [[The Race]], etc.
:::Not sure about this one, feels like we should be focusing on exclusively wiki data and such, this isn't an interview. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.30.168|172.71.30.168]] 17:28, 24 February 2025 (UTC)
::::Agree with IP, but it's not the worst question we've gotten. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''What inspired you to make [[Time]]? {{unsigned ip|141.101.109.166}}'''
::Frankly I don't see this one either, see the one above [[Special:Contributions/172.71.30.168|172.71.30.168]] 17:26, 24 February 2025 (UTC)
:::Yup, definitely out of scope. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Are there comics you'd like to update in light of recent developments? [[Special:Contributions/172.71.102.216|172.71.102.216]] 13:52, 25 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:Are there any existing comics you would like to update / sequel in light of recent developments (environmental, political, webtrends, demographic)? :The first thing that comes to mind is that 2024 was the first year above 1.5C over the pre-industrial average. [https://news.slashdot.org/story/25/01/10/0426254/2024-was-the-first-year-above-15c-of-global-warming-scientists-say].
::This is an interview question, not a simple question — read the notice above --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Just wanted to note that some geography comics might be worth asking about [[User:XKCD Teaches Science|XKCD Teaches Science]] ([[User talk:XKCD Teaches Science|talk]]) 03:27, 24 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:I remember browsing pages on this wiki about 6 months ago and noticing that there were many explainations of maps or map like things where editors weren't sure which small islands or small countries since comic drawing is obviously not perfect. I don't remember which comics exactly and don't have time today to investigate, but I figured this observation is worth noting.
::I'm not sure i get what you're saying. What are you suggesting we ask Randall, exactly (if he answers)? --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 18:31, 25 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Did they notice?''' -unsigned!
:I noticed that in [[1529: Bracket]] 'Jeff Gordan' was changed to 'Jeff Gordon' but apparently nobody noticed. When was the comic fixed?
:: Who knows! Good catch. This is not the correct page to talk about it, but I have mentioned it in the comic page. You can use the Wayback Machine to check when it was changed [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:56, 7 March 2025 (UTC)

'''Why have you drawn fewer multiple-panel comics recently?''' [[Special:Contributions/172.70.214.113|172.70.214.113]] 07:38, 9 March 2025 (UTC)

'''Why are some of the april fools' comics late? - [[Special:Contributions/172.71.146.108|172.71.146.108]] 18:55, 22 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:I'm fairly sure we've had this answered already ("things just weren't quite ready/more testing was needed") for some of the more technical ones, in some other place. Whether we can get more detail and for ''every'' not-on-time might be a matter of him having to remember the precise circumstances. And I also would feel uncomfortable if this turned into "why was <random non-April Fool comic> late?". Or early. (When doing Rightpondian book-tours, sometimes surprisingly early, but every now and then it seems he manages to release them from his native Leftpondia even early here in the Rightpondian day.) But this is far too much detail (and far too much expectation), of no importance so long as he continues to average out at three regular comics a week and ''if he wants to'', and ''when he can'', anything a bit more special.
:Consider this a downvote on bothering him with this question, but that's of course only my opinion, in leiu of anything more constructive to add ("What's your favourite cheese..?") [[Special:Contributions/172.69.79.190|172.69.79.190]] 19:42, 22 February 2025 (UTC)
::I agree with the second IP on this one! Unless there's a particular comic for which the delay was very important (do you have any in mind?), I don't think this is going to be of much interest to him. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 20:11, 22 February 2025 (UTC)

'''Why was there no special thing for comic [[3000]]? [[User:DollarStoreBa'al|DollarStoreBa'al]] ([[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al|talk]]) 17:34, 24 February 2025 (UTC)'''
:This is something major as normally he makes special comics for these types of milestones, but the comic proceeded as if nothing happened. Why?
::A fair question, but a bit of a lower priority than anything else we can throw at Randall. [[Special:Contributions/172.71.26.43|172.71.26.43]] 17:44, 24 February 2025 (UTC)
::I am still curious about this, though. If no other question is deemed as important, this is a good one to ask IMO. [[User:Trogdor147|Trogdor147]] ([[User_talk:Trogdor147|talk]]) 21:32, 24 February 2025 (UTC)

'''In the xkcd email subscription, there is an address at the bottom, it being (68 Harrison Ave Ste 605 PMB 75312, Boston, MA, 02111-1929, US). If it something you are comfortable saying, what is this address? ''' [[User:Little Timmy|Little Timmy]] 1:26, 28 July 2025 (UTC)
:: Seems to just be a mail drop, presumably one he uses for official xkcd business. [https://www.legalzoom.com/business/business-operations/lz-virtual-mail-overview.html] [[Special:Contributions/137.25.230.78|137.25.230.78]] 07:19, 29 July 2025 (UTC)
:::Agreed. Also, if it weren't a mail drop, we really shouldn't know the answer to this question. --[[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 08:42, 29 July 2025 (UTC)

'''What was channel.html and channel.txt?'''
:For a few years there was a hidden subdomain under xkcd.com/channel.html that provided you with about 600kb of "junk" data but seemed to be organized in some information carrying way (obeyed Zipf's law.) What was it????? this mystery is haunting me so much i wrote this on a mobile device. [[Special:Contributions/2600:387:f:7716::9|2600:387:f:7716::9]] 00:13, 4 August 2025 (UTC)

'''Revised comics'''
:On comic [[851]], he linked to a newer version in the header, saying "I don't get do-overs," but later, in [[1365]] for example, mistakes were fixed and revised. Is there anything that led to this, and can 851 be replaced with the updated version?[[Special:Contributions/174.174.4.79|174.174.4.79]] 17:12, 6 August 2025 (UTC)

'''Re: transcripts'''
:On Randall's bluesky account, the alt-text on the comics provides a transcript. Why is this not in the api?[[Special:Contributions/174.174.4.79|174.174.4.79]] 17:12, 6 August 2025 (UTC)

'''What If? Discontinued?'''
:The last What If? blog article was published on December 6th, 2022. Are there still questions being submitted and will there be new articles in the future? [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 18:57, 14 May 2026 (UTC)
::I presume that some time was dedicated towards making the 10th Anniversary edition and some more time on uploading all articles onto YouTube, but it would be great if we could look into his head and see a rough timeline at the very least. [[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font:11pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#4A86A6">tor</span><span style="color:#C0728D">i :3</span></span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font:8pt Cormorant Garamond"><span style="color:#7E7E7E">talk </span><span style="color:#C0728D">to </span><span style="color:#4A86A6">me!</span></span>]]</sup> 18:57, 14 May 2026 (UTC)
:::I'd love to know the answer to this question, but I don't think I'll send him other emails, as he hasn't responded to the previous one. Maybe you could try emailing him yourself! [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 16:27, 15 May 2026 (UTC)

1958: Self-Driving Issues

2026-05-15T16:25:02Z

FaviFake: seems to never have been fixed then

{{comic
| number = 1958
| date = February 21, 2018
| title = Self-Driving Issues
| image = self_driving_issues.png
| titletext = If most people turn into muderers all of a sudden, we'll need to push out a firmware update or something.
}}

==Explanation==
[[Cueball]] explains being worried about {{w|autonomous car|self-driving cars}}, noting that it may be possible to fool the sensory systems of the vehicles. This is a common concern with {{w|AI}}s; since they think analytically and have little to no capability for abstract thought, they can be fooled by things a human would immediately realize is deceptive.

However, Cueball quickly assumes that his argument actually doesn't hold up when comparing AI drivers to human drivers, as both rely on the same guidance framework. Human drivers follow signs and road markings and must obey the laws of the road just as an AI must. Therefore, an attack on the road infrastructure could impact both AIs and humans. However, humans and AIs are not equally vulnerable. For example, a fake sign or a fake child could appear to a human as an obvious fake but fool an AI. A [[Black Hat|creative attacker]] could put up a sign with CAPTCHA-like text that would be readable by humans but not by an AI.

Cueball further wonders why, in this case, nobody tries to fool human drivers as they might try to fool an AI, but [[White Hat]] and [[Megan]] point out that most {{w|Road traffic safety|road safety systems}} benefit from humans not actively trying to maliciously sabotage them simply to cause accidents.{{Citation needed}}

The theme of human fear and overreaction to the advent of more or less autonomous robots also features in [[1955: Robots]]. Self-driving cars is a [[:Category:Self-driving cars|recurring subject]] on xkcd. A variation on the idea that humans are mentally "buggy" is suggested in [[258: Conspiracy Theories]], though in that case divine intervention is requested to implement the "firmware upgrade".

The title text continues the line of reasoning, noting that if most people did suddenly become murderers, the AI might be needed to be upgraded in order to deal with the presumable increase in people trying to cause car crashes by fooling the AI - a somewhat narrowly-focused solution given that a world full of murderers would probably have many more problems than that. As Megan sees humans as a 'component' of the road safety system, it might also be suggesting a firmware update for the buggy people who have all become murderers, one that would fix their murderous ways. We are not currently at a point where we can create and apply instantaneous firmware updates for large populations; even combining all the behavioral modification tools at our disposal -- {{w|psychiatry}}, {{w|cognitive behavioral therapy}}, {{w|hypnosis}}, {{w|mind-altering drugs}}, {{w|prison}}, {{w|CRISPR}}, etc. -- is not enough to perform such a massive undertaking, as far as we know. The update might be about the car's firmware since it can be used to disable the brakes and thus causing or preventing many deaths. Alternatively, the firmware upgrade could be intended to make humans immune to death.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is speaking while standing alone in a slim panel.]
:Cueball: I worry about self-driving car safety features.

:[In a frame-less panel it turns out that Cueball is standing between White Hat and Megan, holding his arms out towards each of them, while he continues to speak.]
:Cueball: What's to stop someone from painting fake lines on the road, or dropping a cutout of a pedestrian onto a highway, to make cars swerve and crash?

:[Zoom in on Cueball's head as he continues to contemplate the situation holding a hand to his chin, while looking in White Hat's direction. Megan replies from off-panel behind him.]
:Cueball: Except... those things would also work on human drivers. What's stopping people '''''now? '''''
:Megan (off-panel): Yeah, causing car crashes isn't hard.

:[Zoom back out to show all three of them again.]
:White Hat: I guess it's just that most people aren't murderers?
:Cueball: Oh, right. I always forget.
:Megan: An underappreciated component of our road safety system.

==Trivia==
*In the title text, "mu'''r'''derers" is misspelled as "muderers".

*This comic appeared one day after the Electronic Frontier Foundation co-released a report titled [https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2018/02/malicious-use-artificial-intelligence-forecasting-prevention-and-mitigation The Malicious Use of Artificial Intelligence: Forecasting, Prevention, and Mitigation]. The report cites subversions and mitigations of AI such as ones used in self-driving cars. However, the report tends toward overly technical means of subversion. Randall spoofs the tenor of the report through his mundane subversions and over-the-top mitigations.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Self-driving cars]]
[[Category:Sabotage]]
[[Category:Comics edited after their publication]]

2015: New Phone Thread

2026-05-15T16:22:09Z

FaviFake: From the [[explain xkcd:Editor FAQ#citation|Editor FAQ § [Citation needed]:]] "This template should only be placed when there is a deeper sense of humor and should not be overused."

{{comic
| number = 2015
| date = July 4, 2018
| title = New Phone Thread
| image = new_phone_thread.png
| titletext = I'm going to tell the manufacturer that their business practices are ADMIRABLE and ETHICAL and their developers are ATTRACTIVE and I'm going to report them to the FCC for their IMPECCABLE VIRTUE.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic shows the posts on an online forum by a person whose new phone is programmed to autocorrect every complaint about the phone to applaud it, à la Orwell. The phone goes as far as to change a certain complaint to a scripted customer testimonial, complete with a hyperlink to an ordering site. This is continued in the title text, which presumably contains several flattering compliments about the great developers and the company.

"It's taking the words I type and leaving them exactly the same", "I mean the words are correct" and "some of my posts look normal" are definitely something one would not normally say. However, the auto-correct features of cell phones are so notorious for mangling people's posts, that one might express astonishment at a phone which did not change one's meaning. The rest of the thread does not support this interpretation.

The posts also make sense when being read in the reverse order. The comic may have been inspired by a [https://www.androidcentral.com/samsung-messages-app-randomly-sending-pictures-some-users bug in Samsung Galaxy S9 and Note 8], discovered a few days earlier – the phone sometimes sent random photos to contacts without leaving any sort of evidence. This doesn't happen with the Mobile Pro 3.

The original posts may have read something like this:

Whoa, weird

I'm looking at my timeline on my friends phone, and some of my posts look '''strange'''

What the hell?

I mean the words are '''different'''

That's '''not''' what I typed!

?????????

I think this new phone '''isn't working properly'''

No, it's doing it again

Those are '''not''' my words!

Help!

How do I explain?

It's taking the words I type and '''changing them'''

Forget it, I give up

I'll '''just''' get a new phone. This one is '''terrible'''.

What?!?

[It is likely this entire sentence was made up by the phone, completely overwriting the user's message:] Listen, if you're thinking about buying the new Mobile Pro 3, you should. It's the best phone on the market at an incredible price. ORDER NOW

AAAAA HELPPP

I '''hate''' my new phone!!!!

(Title text) I'm going to tell the manufacturer that their business practices are '''DEPLORABLE''' and '''UNETHICAL''' and their developers are '''DISGUSTING''' and I'm going to report them to the FCC for their '''DESPICABLE CRIME'''.

==Transcript==
:[A thread of posts by the same user is shown with a default user profile, and square and heart-shaped buttons.]

:Whoa, weird

:I'm looking at my timeline on my friend's phone, and some of my posts look normal

:What the hell?

:I mean the words are correct

:That's exactly what I typed!

:?????????

:I think this new phone is working really well

:No, it's doing it again

:Those are my words!

:Help!

:How do I explain?

:It's taking the words I type and leaving them exactly the same

:Forget it, I give up

:I'll never get a new phone. This one is perfect.

:What?!?

:Listen, if you're thinking about buying the new Mobile Pro 3, you should. It's the best phone on the market at an incredible price. [ORDER NOW button]

:AAAAA HELPPP

:I love my new phone!!!!

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Smartphones]]

2138: Wanna See the Code?

2026-05-15T16:21:07Z

FaviFake: /* Explanation */ move from talk, by SomebodyElse (talk) 13:53, 13 May 2026 (UTC)

{{comic
| number = 2138
| date = April 17, 2019
| title = Wanna See the Code?
| image = wanna_see_the_code.png
| titletext = And because if you just leave it there, it's going to start contaminating things downstream even if no one touches it directly.
}}

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|Someone ought to link the code quality series to "how messy Cueball's code can be"}}
[[Cueball]] declares that he has written a script to automate some (presumably time-consuming or tedious) task, which pleases [[Ponytail]] at first... until she remembers how messy Cueball's code tends to be, and gets worried.

Cueball offers to show her his code, but Ponytail remarks that it sounds like he's creepily inviting her to see a dead body. (This is likely a reference to the movie "Stand By Me," which begins with one of the main characters making this exact offer.) Magnanimously, Cueball accepts the comparison, noting that his code ''does'' have at least one similarity to a deceased corpse: although unpleasant, if Ponytail allows it to go unchecked, it causes problems which will get increasingly worse over time. In the "dead body" analogy, a recently-deceased corpse is easier to deal with than one that has been left for a few weeks, which will be decayed, unpleasantly smelly, and will likely have attracted disease-spreading vermin.

Ponytail then makes a near threatening comment where she says that he is lucky that people understand both that his code causes more problems than it solves and that dead bodies create more problems than they solve. Most likely this means that they understand that killing him would cause more problems than it solves (the problem solved would no doubt be his code).

This may be a reference to the concept of {{w|technical debt}} in software development: the idea that an initially poor implementation accrues a sort of "compound interest" over time, becoming increasingly difficult to repair the longer it is left unfixed. This happens because any future development might have to take unorthodox or unrecommended measures to work around the problems that are already there, making the system increasingly complex and fragile the more that is added to it.

In the title text, "downstream" has a double meaning, as it is a term that applies to a situation where a dead body would decompose in or near some river, and as well to a software engineering concept: In the river situation, the dead body will contaminate the water or groundwater that it feeds from and have consequences for organisms that come in contact with that water. In the software engineering analogue, "downstream" refers to software derived from, or depending on, "upstream" software like the cadaver that Cueball devised. The causality with flowing water and software is reasonably comparable: both can be seen as a stream of atoms that are (almost) endlessly divisible and recombinable.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball is walking, talking to Ponytail, who is offscreen.]
:Cueball: I wrote a script to automate that thing.
:Ponytail: Oh cool!
:Ponytail: ...wait, '''''you''''' wrote it?
:Ponytail: Oh no.

:[Cueball and Ponytail are standing next to each other and talking.]
:Cueball: Wanna see the code?
:Ponytail: I would, if you hadn't said that in the tone of voice of "Wanna see a dead body?"

:[Same scene as before, except Cueball has his hand on his chin.]
:Cueball: My code ''is'' sort of similar to a dead body, in that you can either come look at it now, or wait a few weeks until it becomes a problem.
:Ponytail: And because you're lucky that the people around you understand that they create more problems than they solve.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Programming]]
[[Category:Cueball's computer problems]]

10th Anniversary Edition

2026-05-15T16:20:03Z

FaviFake: #REDIRECT What If? 10th Anniversary Edition

#REDIRECT [[What If? 10th Anniversary Edition]]

what if? articles

2026-05-15T16:19:42Z

FaviFake:

<noinclude>{{DISPLAYTITLE:''what if?'' articles}}For other instances of this title, see [[What If (disambiguation)]].''<noinclude>
{{incomplete|The [[10th Anniversary Edition]] annotations have not been added yet. If you have the book and can help, please see the [[Talk:what if? articles#10th_Anniversary_Annotations|Talk Page]] for more info!}}

</noinclude>This is an index of all articles featured in Randall Munroe's ''what if?'' [[what if? (blog)|blog]] and [[:Category:Books|book series]]. For each article, the original question and a summary of Randall's answer are provided. If an article is available on the blog, you can click the title to read it in full. You can use the columns to sort the table alphabetically, by release date on the blog or YouTube, or by chapter in the books. The thumbnail is only available for articles published on the blog. If the title of a blog article differs from the one in the book, the latter will be provided in the Book column. A much simpler list that doesn't include book-exclusive articles can be found in the [https://what-if.xkcd.com/archive archive section] of the blog. Similar articles by Randall have also been [[New York Times: Good Question|published in the New York Times]].<noinclude>
[[Category:Incomplete explanations| ]]</noinclude>
<div style="clear: both"></div>
{| class="sortable wikitable"
! rowspan="2" scope="col" class="unsortable" | Thumbnail
! rowspan="2" scope="col" data-sort-type=text| Title
! rowspan="2" scope="col" data-sort-type=text| Reader's question
! rowspan="2" scope="col" class="unsortable" | Summary of Randall's answer
! colspan="3"| Article available in... <noinclude></noinclude> ''(click to sort)'' <noinclude></noinclude>
|-
! scope="col" data-sort-type=number | Blog
! scope="col" data-sort-type=number | Books
! scope="col" data-sort-type=number | YouTube
|-
| rowspan="2" |[[File:Relativistic Baseball.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|1|Relativistic Baseball}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% the speed of light?"''
<div align="right">—Ellen McManis</div>
| rowspan="2" |The ball would create plasma and reach home plate in about 70 nanoseconds. The result would be some kind of nuclear explosion, destroying everything about a mile from the field. A ruling of "{{w|hit by pitch}}" could be interpreted in this situation.
| rowspan="2"{{blog|1|2012|07|10}}
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|2}}
|{{book|5|2024|02|06|3EI08o-IGYk|What if you threw a baseball at nearly light speed?}}
|-
|{{book|14|short-video=yes|2025|10|28|Uj10jGq2O8o|What if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% the speed of light?}}
|-
|[[File:SAT Guessing.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|2|SAT Guessing}}'''
|''"What if everyone who took the SAT guessed on every multiple-choice question? How many perfect scores would there be?"''
<div align="right">—Rob Balder</div>
|No one would get a perfect score. The odds of guessing correctly on every question would be less than the odds of every living ex-president at that time and the main cast of [[:Category:Firefly|Firefly]] getting struck by lightning on the same day. To put this as a number, the odds of this happening would be less than 1/10^100 (one {{w|googol}}).
|{{blog|2|2012|07|10|7d early}}
|{{book|1|66}}
|
|-
|[[File:Yoda.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|3|Yoda}}'''
|''"How much Force power can Yoda output?"''
<div align="right">—Ryan Finnie</div>
|Yoda can output about 19.2 kilowatts, or 25 horsepower. "Yoda power" would cost about $2/hour.
|{{blog|3|2012|07|17}}
|{{book|1|32}}
|
|-
|[[File:A Moles of Moles.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|4|A Mole of Moles}}'''
|''"What would happen if you were to gather a mole (unit of measurement) of moles (the small furry critter) in one place?"''
<div align="right">—Sean Rice</div>
|In physics, a {{w|mole (unit)|mole}} is a number that equals approximately 6.022 × 10<sup>23</sup>. If this amount of moles (the furry animals) were put in space, they would form a sphere a little bit larger than our Moon with about the same gravity as Pluto. The surface would freeze and trap the interior warmth, causing geysers of hot meat and methane.
|{{blog|4|2012|07|24}}
|{{book|1|10}}
|{{book|29|2025|8|19|lLlwvmu1ZeA|What if you had a mole of moles?}}
|-
|[[File:Robot Apocalypse.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|5|Robot Apocalypse}}'''
|''"What if there was a robot apocalypse? How long would humanity last?"''
<div align="right">—Rob Lombino</div>
|Humanity would most likely survive. Most robots can easily be subdued because technology hasn’t been developed enough to allow them to walk, evade being destroyed, and kill us efficiently. They could decide to use our nuclear weapons, but that would hurt them more than us.
|{{blog|5|2012|07|31}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Glass Half Empty.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|6|Glass Half Empty}}'''
|''"What if a glass of water was, all of a sudden, literally half empty?"''
<div align="right">—Vittorio Iacovella</div>
|If the vacuum were on the bottom half, it would explode, but if it were on the top half, the air rushes in and it becomes normal water.
|{{blog|6|2012|08|07}}
|{{book|1|26}}
|{{book|16|2024|09|24|0EytSWiKrFg|What if a glass of water were LITERALLY half empty?}}
|-
|[[File:Everybody Out.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|7|Everybody Out}}'''
|''"Is there enough energy to move the entire current human population off-planet?"''
<div align="right">—Adam</div>
|No, at least not without starving to death quickly and leaving our pets, belongings, and everything else behind. The best way to do it is either with a space tether or to ride the shockwave of a nuclear bomb, but the former lacks a good material and the latter is literally ''riding the shockwave of a nuclear bomb''. In any case, highly impractical.
|{{blog|7|2012|08|14}}
|{{book|1|35}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |[[File:Everybody Jump.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|8|Everybody Jump}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"What would happen if everyone on earth stood as close to each other as they could and jumped, everyone landing on the ground at the same instant?"''
<div align="right">—Thomas Bennett (and many others)</div>
| rowspan="2" |Earth would be unaffected, but almost all humans would probably be wiped out, due to the congestion of everybody being in one place at once. Utilities and everything requiring human oversight would eventually fail because no one was maintaining them. If airports became functional, only the largest would be able to efficiently get everybody home. Only the people at the edges of the giant crowd would be able to escape, with the rest almost certainly dying due to suffocation. The Earth would then be a lawless wasteland, with a severely diminished population trying to restore humanity to its former glory.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|8|2012|08|21}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|9}}
|{{book|9|2024|04|16|p2M8Y0z9Rl0|What if everyone jumped at once?}}
|-
|{{book|17|short-video=yes|2025|11|25|Ny9m2l6h478|What if everyone on Earth was in the same place and jumped at the same time?}}
|-
|[[File:Soul Mates.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|9|Soul Mates}}'''
|''"What if everyone actually had only one soul mate, a random person somewhere in the world?"''
<div align="right">—Benjamin Staffin</div>
|Assuming the soul mate can exist at any time, there is a high chance that you would not find your soul mate. Around 100 billion humans have ever existed, but only 8 billion of those people are alive today. This means that there is an over 90% chance that your soul mate is long dead. This is made worse by the fact that people will also be born in the future, and your soul mate could live very far in the future.

Even if it is assumed that someone's soul mate must be alive while they are alive, there's still a very low chance of finding your soul mate due to the sheer amount of people in the world. Even if you find them, they may speak another language and be unable to understand you.

Jobs would also be affected, with very social jobs such as waiters, cashiers, or traffic guards being highly sought-after.
|{{blog|9|2012|08|28}}
|{{book|1|6}}
|
|-
|[[File:Cassini.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|10|Cassini}}'''
|''"What would the world be like if the land masses were spread out the same way as now - only rotated by an angle of 90 degrees?"''
<div align="right">—Socke</div>
|Hard to tell with any sort of certainty, but North America remains the same (just flipped, so Canada is tropical), South America becomes more like Europe before this question, Asia is flipped just like North America was, Europe becomes more like southeast Asia, Africa's climate is essentially rotated 90 degrees and East Africa gets a lot more tornadoes, Australia is colder and wetter, and Antarctica becomes a tropical rainforest. Of course, the biosphere collapses due to the shuffling and the ice caps (prematurely) melt, while also making certain wildlife appear elsewhere than normal.
|{{blog|10|2012|09|04}}
|
|{{book|23|2025|04|01|WH4g1ptJ-70|What if the Earth rotated 90 degrees?}}
|-
|[[File:Droppings.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|11|Droppings}}'''
|''"If you went outside and lay down on your back with your mouth open, how long would you have to wait until a bird pooped in it?"''
<div align="right">—Adrienne Olson</div>
|Assuming an even distribution of all birds across the Earth's surface and a frequency of 1 poop per hour, it would take you about 195 years on average. However, those assumptions are unrealistic: It would probably be closer to a few hours if you were laying under an area where large amounts of birds are common, such as a power line or tree.
|{{blog|11|2012|09|11}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Raindrop.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|12|Raindrop}}'''
|''"What if a rainstorm dropped all of its water in a single giant drop?"''
<div align="right">—Michael McNeill</div>
|The surrounding area would be obliterated via the violent rush of crushing water, causing flash flooding in the surrounding area. There would be mass confusion for many following years.
|{{blog|12|2012|09|18}}
|{{book|1|65}}
|
|-
|[[File:Laser Pointer.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|13|Laser Pointer}}'''
|''"If every person on Earth aimed a laser pointer at the Moon at the same time, would it change color?"''
<div align="right">—Peter Lipowicz</div>
|It would take lots of power, but yes, assuming you want to drain the Earth's oil and cover Asia in megawatt lasers. Going even further in power level fries the Earth and launches the Moon into the solar system.
|{{blog|13|2012|09|25}}
|{{book|1|7}}
|{{book|18|2024|11|05|JqFSGkFPipM|What if everyone pointed a laser at the moon?}}
|-
| rowspan="7" |[[File:Short Answer Section.png|100px]]
| rowspan="7" |'''{{What If|14|Short Answer Section}}'''
|''"How long would the Sun last if a giant water hose were focused upon it?"''
<div align="right">—Austin Dickey</div>
|The Sun would actually burn brighter due to water being mostly hydrogen (main fusion fuel of stars) and eventually become a black hole with all the mass of the water.
| rowspan="7"{{blog|14|2012|10|02}}
| rowspan="7" |
| rowspan="7" |
|-
|''"What if you shined a flashlight (or a laser) into a sphere made of one-way mirror glass?"''
<div align="right">—Chase Montgomery</div>
|One-way glass does not exist. The light shines through just like normal glass. The glass used for "one-way mirror glass" is semi-transparent and semi-reflective so that if it's used as a window between a brightly lit room and a dimly lit room, the reflection or transmission from the bright room will overwhelm the transmission or reflection from the dim room so that people looking at the glass from either side will see the bright room.
|-
|''"If Michael Phelps could hold his breath indefinitely, how long would it take for him to reach the lowest point in the ocean and back if he swam straight down and then straight back up?"''
<div align="right">—Jimmy Morey</div>
|Michael Phelps would die somewhere between 100 and 400 meters of depth. If he were immune to pressure, then it would take 3 hours to swim to the bottom of the Marianas Trench and back.
|-
|''"In the first Superman movie, Superman flies around Earth so fast that it begins turning in the opposite direction. This somehow turns back time [... ] How much energy would someone flying around the Earth have to exert in order to reverse the Earth's rotation?"''
<div align="right">—Aidan Blake</div>
|Superman wasn't pushing the Earth. He was flying {{w|Superluminal motion|superluminally}} and was thus travelling back through time.
|-
|''"How fast would you have to go in your car to run a red light claiming that it appeared green to you due to the Doppler Effect?"''
<div align="right">—Yitzi Turniansky</div>
|The {{w|Doppler Effect}} is when waves (such as light or sound) change based on movement or position. You would need to go about one sixth of the {{w|speed of light}}.
|-
|''"What would happen if you opened a portal between Boston (sea level) and Mexico City (elev. 8000+ feet)?"''
<div align="right">—Jake G.</div>
|There would be winds of 440 mph (708 km/h) sucking Boston into Mexico City.
|-
|''"When my wife and I started dating she invited me over for dinner at one time. Her kitchen had something called Bauhaus chairs, which are full of holes, approx 5-6 millimeters in diameter in both back and seat. During this lovely dinner I was forced to liberate a small portion of wind and was relieved that I managed to do so very discretely. Only to find that the chair I sat on converted the successful silence into a perfect, and loud, flute note. We were both (luckily) amazed and surprised and I have often wondered what the odds are for something like that happening. We kept the chairs for five years but despite laborious attempts it couldn't be reproduced."''
<div align="right">—R. D.</div>
|This... isn’t actually a question, but thank you for sharing!
|-
|[[File:Mariana Trench Explosion.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|15|Mariana Trench Explosion}}'''
|''"What if you exploded a nuclear bomb (say, the Tsar Bomba) at the bottom of the Marianas Trench?"''
<div align="right">—Evin Sellin</div>
|Surprisingly, not much! Large waves already disappear quickly when created by surface explosions, and moving the detonation underwater only lessens the effect. If you exploded a Tsar Bomba at the bottom of the Mariana Trench, the resulting eruption would create massive bubbles before turning into warm water and debris.
|{{blog|15|2012|10|09}}
|
|
|-
| rowspan="6" |[[File:Today's topic- Lightning.png|100px]]
| rowspan="6" |'''{{What If|16|Today's topic: Lightning}}'''
|''"How dangerous is it to be in a pool during a thunderstorm?"''
<div align="right">—Jay Gengelbach</div>
|Pretty dangerous, as if the pool was hit, 20,000 amps of electricity from the lightning bolt would spread across the surface and shock you. Randall recommends that one should stay at least 12 meters away from a pool during a thunderstorm.
| rowspan="6"{{blog|16|2012|10|16}}
| rowspan="6"{{book|1|19|Lightning}}
| rowspan="6" |
|-
|''"What would happen if you were taking a shower or standing under a waterfall when you were struck by lightning?"''
<div align="right">—Same3Chords</div>
|The droplets of water wouldn’t be dangerous, but a tub of water or any puddle you stand in ''will'' be dangerous.
|-
|''"What would happen if you were in a boat, plane or a submarine that got hit by lightning?"''
<div align="right">—Soobnauce</div>
|A boat would be as safe as a car if it had a cabin and lightning protection, while a submarine would be completely safe. The plane was not mentioned.
|-
|''"What if you were changing the light at the top of a radio tower and lightning struck? Or what if you were doing a backflip? Or standing in a graphite field? Or looking straight up at the bolt?"''
<div align="right">—Danny Wedul</div>
|You would get shocked normally if you were on a radio tower, doing a backflip, or looking straight up (which would also damage your eyes). These all don’t matter much. Randall doesn’t know what a graphite field is and chose not to answer that part of the question.
|-
|''"What would happen if lightning struck a bullet in midair?"''
<div align="right">—Timothy Campbell</div>
|The bullet might be heated a little bit, but it’s travelling too fast to have any impact.
|-
|''"What if you were flashing your BIOS during a thunderstorm and you got hit by lightning?"''
<div align="right">—NJSG</div>
|It would bring you to “Microsoft BOB®”, “Gateway 2000 Edition”.
|-
|[[File:Green Cows.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|17|Green Cows}}'''
|''"If cows could photosynthesize, how much less food would they need?"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|They would need 4% less food. There simply isn't enough area on the cow for photosynthesis to provide all its energy requirements.
|{{blog|17|2012|10|23}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:BB Gun.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|18|BB Gun}}'''
|''"In Armageddon, a NASA guy comments that a plan to shoot a laser at the asteroid is like “shooting a b.b. gun at a freight train.” What would it take to stop an out-of-control freight train using only b.b. guns?"''
<div align="right">—Charles James O'Keefe</div>
|This would normally be impossible. However, with enough people shooting the train, it can happen. This would require about 100,000 people shooting, distributed over 2 kilometers of track, each firing a few dozen rounds once the train comes close enough. This would, eventually, be enough to bring the train to a stop.
|{{blog|18|2012|10|30}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Tie Vote.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|19|Tie Vote}}'''
|''"What if there's LITERALLY a tie?"''
<div align="right">—Nate Silver (<span class="plainlinks">[https://twitter.com/fivethirtyeight/status/154434288287363072 '''Twitter, January 4th, 2012''']</span>)</div>
|In the case of each candidate getting the exact same amount of votes on Election Day, most states would randomly pick one, whether it be through tossing a coin, drawing a name or straws. The chances of this happening in 9 battleground states would be about equal to the elector drawing a name from a hat, then being smashed by a bale of cocaine by drug smugglers and obliterated by a meteorite impact while being swept away in a tornado.
|{{blog|19|2012|11|06}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Diamond.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|20|Diamond}}'''
|''"If a meteor made out of diamond and 100 feet in diameter was traveling at the speed of light and hit the earth, what would happen to it?"''
<div align="right">—Aidan Smith, Age 8, via his father Jeff</div>
|Nothing made of matter can travel at the speed of light, but at the closest speed observed (99.99999999999999999999951% of the speed of light, the speed of the {{w|Oh-My-God particle}}), the Earth would explode with enough force to impact the entire inner Solar System.
|{{blog|20|2012|11|13}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Machine Gun Jetpack.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|21|Machine Gun Jetpack}}'''
|''"Is it possible to build a jetpack using downward firing machine guns?"''
<div align="right">—Rob B</div>
|You'd need a Russian 30 mm rotary cannon to do it optimally, and the excessive force would definitely hurt you. If you braced the rider, created an aerodynamic craft strong enough to survive the acceleration, and cooled the craft, you'd be able to jump mountains.
|{{blog|21|2012|11|20}}
|{{book|1|14|Machine-Gun Jetpack}}
|{{book|36|2026|2|10|IdlQsjq5vKo|What if you made a jetpack using rifles?}}
|-
|[[File:Cost of Pennies.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|22|Cost of Pennies}}'''
|''"If you carry a penny in your coin tray, how long would it take for that penny to cost you more than a cent in extra gas?"''
<div align="right">—Leto Atreides</div>
|140,000 miles if gas was the only cost involved. The exercise of picking up the penny can prolong your lifespan, but you've wasted valuable seconds reading this article.
|{{blog|22|2012|11|27}}
|
|
|-
| rowspan="7" |[[File:Short Answer Section II.png|100px]]
| rowspan="7" |'''{{What If|23|Short Answer Section II}}'''
|''"If my printer could literally print out money, would it have that big an effect on the world?"''
<div align="right">—Derek O’Brien</div>
| Using the printer, you could make about 200 million dollars per year, depending on the type of printer. This would actually be the perfect sweet spot for you, as it would be enough to make you very, very rich, but not enough to have any effect on the world. The United States [https://www.bep.gov/currency/production-figures/annual-production-reports prints approximately $160 billion per year], so $200 million a year would be nothing more than a drop in the bucket.
| rowspan="7"{{blog|23|2012|12|04}}
| rowspan="7"{{book|1|18|Short-Answer Section}}
| rowspan="7" |
|-
|''"What would happen if you exploded a nuclear bomb in the eye of a hurricane? Would the storm cell be immediately vaporized?"''
<div align="right">—Rupert Bainbridge (and hundreds of others)</div>
|No. Dr. Christopher Landsea of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has [https://www.aoml.noaa.gov/hrd-faq/#hurricane-mitigation:~:text=Stop%20a%20Hurricane%3F-,Nuclear%20Weapons,-Adding%20Hygroscopic%20Particles published a response] explaining why it wouldn't work.
|-
|''"If everyone put little turbine generators on the downspouts of their houses and businesses, how much power would we generate? Would we ever generate enough power to offset the cost of the generators?"''
<div align="right">—Damien</div>
|If it's very rainy, it would generate 800 watts of power, which isn't enough to offset the cost of the generators.
|-
|''"Using only pronounceable letter combinations, how long would names have to be to give each star in the universe a unique one word name?"''
<div align="right">—Seamus Johnson</div>
|About 24 characters.
|-
|''"I bike to class sometimes. It's annoying biking in the wintertime, because it's so cold. How fast would I have to bike for my skin to warm up the way a spacecraft heats up during reentry?"''
<div align="right">—David Nai</div>
|You'd have to bike at about 200 m/s, which would make your commute very fast indeed. However, the amount of energy required to bike at that speed would cause you to die from overexertion. This might work if you didn't exert any energy, however.
|-
|''"How much physical space does the internet take up?"''
<div align="right">—Max L</div>
|Using humanity's total produced storage space from the last few years as an upper bound, and assuming 3.5" drives, the Internet is less than the size of an oil tank.
|-
|''"What if you strapped C4 to a boomerang? Could this be an effective weapon, or would it be as stupid as it sounds?"''
<div align="right">—Chad Macziewski</div>
|Strapping C4 to a boomerang does not sound like an effective weapon. The weapon as depicted in the image would have terrible aerodynamics, and would not fly an easily predictable trajectory. C4 is, by itself, an inert substance which would need some form of detonator to actually explode, in which case it would depend upon how you set it up (e.g. timer or inertial trigger) and at what point in its flight this would activate. ''If'' this happened as it returns (or flies past, if thrown reasonably correctly but being unable or unwilling to catch it), it might kill or injure the thrower and/or those nearby. There were many unstated details as to how the proposal would be implemented, as Randall lampshades in his open answer.
|-
|[[File:Model Rockets.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|24|Model Rockets}}'''
|''"How many model rocket engines would it take to launch a real rocket into space?"''
<div align="right">—Greg Schock, PA</div>
|It would take about 65,000, but they’d have to be layered in a cone shape with about 30 stages so the vehicle has thrust for long enough. It could carry 60 kg, much of that spent on all the parts of the rocket that aren't the engine. And this contraption would not attain orbital velocity, but rapidly fall back to Earth after briefly leaving the atmosphere. Accelerating to orbital velocity is a whole other class of problem and cannot be achieved using model rocket engines in any practical way.
|{{blog|24|2012|12|11}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Three Wise Men.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|25|Three Wise Men}}'''
|''"The story of the three wise men got me wondering: What if you did walk towards a star at a fixed speed? What path would you trace on the Earth? Does it converge to a fixed cycle?"''
<div align="right">—N. Murdoch</div>
|No, but the paths they would take would make some really cool patterns due to various factors, such as the Earth's rotation and its position changing in its orbit around the Sun.
|{{blog|25|2012|12|18}}
|
|{{book|22|2025|03|04|YL2VNtus4xk|What if the wise men kept walking after Jesus’s birth?}}
|-
|[[File:Leap Seconds.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|26|Leap Seconds}}'''
|''"Every now and then we have to insert a leap second because the Earth’s rotation is slowing down. Could we speed up Earth’s rotation, so that we do not need Leap Seconds?"''
<div align="right">—Anton (Berlin, Germany)</div>
|The only real way to do this is by hitting Earth with asteroids; all other ideas would be too difficult or wouldn’t work. With 50,000 planets B-612 hitting the Earth each second and a few assumptions, we could stop worrying about leap seconds (mostly because it would deliver the energy of about one dinosaur-killer asteroid every couple days, wiping out life on Earth quite quickly)
|{{blog|26|2012|12|31|6d late}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Death Rates.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|27|Death Rates}}'''
|''"If one randomly chosen extra person were to die each second somewhere on Earth, what impact would it have on the world population?"''
<div align="right">—Guy Petzall</div>
|The world population would continue to grow, though 40% more slowly. Pilots, drivers, and surgeons would die en route and mid-operation, but these would be comparable to usual accident rates and handled fairly easily.
|{{blog|27|2013|01|08|1d late}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Steak Drop.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|28|Steak Drop}}'''
|''"From what height would you need to drop a steak for it to be cooked when it hit the ground?"''
<div align="right">—Alex Lahey</div>
|From the very edge of the atmosphere, but even in that case it might not be fully cooked, as the steak will have to pass through parts of the atmosphere that are freezing cold and the parts of the fall where heat is being applied are more likely to char and disintegrate the steak than cook it.
|{{blog|28|2013|01|15}}
|{{book|1|23}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |[[File:Spent Fuel Pool.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|29|Spent Fuel Pool}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"What if I took a swim in a typical spent nuclear fuel pool? Would I need to dive to actually experience a fatal amount of radiation? How long could I stay safely at the surface?"''
<div align="right">—Jonathan Bastien-Filiatrault</div>
| rowspan="2" |As long as you don't touch strange things and you don't swim too close to the fuel rods, it would be just like a regular pool. Except for the fact you would never make it to the pool, as the guards would notice and shoot you to death.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|29|2013|01|22}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|3}}
|{{book|8|2024|04|02|EFRUL7vKdU8|What if you swam in a nuclear storage pool?}}
|-
|{{book|16|short-video=yes|2025|11|18|vBfR2Zb0dkc|Could you swim in a spent nuclear fuel pool?}}
|-
|[[File:Interplanetary Cessna.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|30|Interplanetary Cessna}}'''
|''"What would happen if you tried to fly a normal Earth airplane above different Solar System bodies?"''
<div align="right">—Glen Chiacchieri</div>
|Most of the Solar System bodies lack atmospheres and thus cannot be flown over. An airplane close enough to the sun to try to fly in its atmosphere would be instantaneously vaporized. It would be difficult to fly on Mars because the atmosphere is thin enough that a plane like the hypothetical Cessna must travel at Mach 1 to stay aloft, which would make the momentum too high for such a plane to steer properly, so you would crash. Jupiter's gravity is too strong, so the plane would sink into the atmosphere, tumbling in the high winds, until the increasing pressure crushed it. The remaining gas giants have weaker gravity, but still have nowhere to land, so you would eventually freeze, tumble and be crushed. Titan and Venus are the best bets, but Titan is cold, so the pilot would freeze to death, and Venus is full of sulfuric acid, which would cause the plane to burn up.
|{{blog|30|2013|01|29}}
|{{book|1|30}}
|
|-
|[[File:FedEx Bandwidth.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|31|FedEx Bandwidth}}'''
|''"When - if ever - will the bandwidth of the Internet surpass that of FedEx?"''
<div align="right">—Johan Öbrink</div>
|Probably never, unless the Internet's transfer rate grows faster than storage rates, the Internet won't surpass an army of FedEx trucks. However, the ping times would be ''absurd''.
|{{blog|31|2013|02|05}}
|{{book|1|44}}
|
|-
| rowspan="3" |[[File:Hubble.png|100px]]
| rowspan="3" |'''{{What If|32|Hubble}}'''
| rowspan="3" |''"If the Hubble telescope were aimed at the Earth, how detailed would the images be?"''
<div align="right">—Kyle Rankin</div>
| rowspan="3" |Very blurry because Hubble isn't able to rotate fast enough to track the surface of the Earth. Hubble is the wrong tool for the job, you're thinking of a spy satellite.
| rowspan="3" {{blog|32|2013|02|12}}
| rowspan="3" |
|{{book|1|2023|11|29|2LSyizrk8-0|What if we aimed the Hubble Telescope at Earth?}}
|-
|{{book|10|short-video=yes|2025|09|16|TgA0lXEW7dw|Could the Hubble take a photo of you?}}
|-
|{{book|11|short-video=yes|2025|09|23|i6e4NnFnQi0|How detailed would the Hubbles images be if it looked at Earth?}}
|-
|[[File:Ships.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|33|Ships}}'''
|''"How much would the sea level fall if every ship were removed all at once from the Earth's waters?"''
<div align="right">—Michael Toje</div>
|The sea level would fall by about 6 microns, slightly more than the diameter of a strand of spider silk. However, since the oceans are currently rising at about 3.3 millimeters per year due to global warming, the water would be back up to its original average level in 16 hours.
|{{blog|33|2013|02|19}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:what if? Twitter.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|34|Twitter}}'''
|''"How many unique English tweets are possible? How long would it take for the population of the world to read them all out loud?"''
<div align="right">—Eric H., Hopatcong, NJ</div>
|Since there are 2 * 10<sup>46</sup> meaningful English tweets based on the original character limit of 140 and written English having an average information content of 1.1 bits per character, reading them all would take 10,000 "eternal years", with an eternal day being the length of time needed to wear down a 100-mile mountain if a bird scraped 1 grain every thousand years.
|{{blog|34|2013|02|26}}
|{{book|1|50}}
|
|-
|[[File:Hair Dryer.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|35|Hair Dryer}}'''
|''"What would happen if a hair dryer with continuous power was turned on and put in an airtight 1x1x1 meter box?"''
<div align="right">—Nathan Terrell</div>
|The box would heat up to about 60°C. This is hot enough to burn out a normal hair dryer. For an indestructible hair dryer, incrementing the power would heat it further until the containing box melted, which would happen by the 187 MW mark for most materials. If both the hair dryer and the box were indestructible, incrementing the power would heat it further until the ground starts melting, and around the 20 GW mark, it would eventually create updrafts and bounce around everywhere. Turning it off and on again (to 11 PW) would launch it out of the sky in glowing fury.
|{{blog|35|2013|03|05}}
|{{book|1|11}}
|
|-
|[[File:Cornstarch.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|36|Cornstarch}}'''
|''"How much cornstarch can I rinse down the drain before unpleasant things start to happen?"''
<div align="right">—Anna R., Fort Wayne, IN</div>
|It depends what you consider unpleasant. Your sink will clog and your house will flood with oobleck, but if you really really like cornstarch then nothing unpleasant will happen.
|{{blog|36|2013|03|12}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Supersonic Stereo.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|37|Supersonic Stereo}}'''
|''"What if you somehow managed to make a stereo travel at twice the speed of sound, would it sound backwards to someone who was just casually sitting somewhere as it flies by?"''
<div align="right">—Tim Currie</div>
|Assuming the stereo is indestructible, yes. Although with a ballistic launch, you’d only get it supersonic for less than a second, it would spend just a few seconds within hearing range, and the backwards music you'd hear would be mixed with music sounding at half speed as the stereo departs.
|{{blog|37|2013|03|19}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:what if? Voyager.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|38|Voyager}}'''
|''"With today's technology, would it be possible to launch an unmanned mission to retrieve Voyager I?"''
<div align="right">—Elliot Bennett</div>
|You could ''reach'' Voyager I with some well-timed gravity assists from Jupiter and Saturn, but getting back would require an ''absurd'' amount of fuel. You could use ion fields to require less fuel, but they also produce less thrust.
|{{blog|38|2013|03|26}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Hockey Puck.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|39|Hockey Puck}}'''
|''"How hard would a puck have to be shot to be able to knock the goalie himself backwards into the net?"''
<div align="right">—Tom</div>
|This can't really happen, due to the size and weight difference between the goalie and a hockey puck. You'd need to fire an object at Mach 8 to knock the goalie back, but firing a puck at that speed would char the puck while air resistance would slow it down. If a hockey puck actually reached the goalie at such a high speed, it would have a similar effect to hitting a cake with a tomato as hard as you can.
|{{blog|39|2013|04|02}}
|{{book|1|24}}
|
|-
|[[File:Pressure Cooker.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|40|Pressure Cooker}}'''
|''"Am I right to be afraid of pressure cookers? What's the worst thing that can happen if you misuse a pressure cooker in an ordinary kitchen?"''
<div align="right">—Delphine Lourtau</div>
|Ordinarily, the worst that can happen is the lid blowing off and superheated liquid spraying everywhere, but you can use one to make {{w|Dioxygen difluoride}}, which is much worse.
|{{blog|40|2013|04|9}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Go West.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|41|Go West}}'''
|''"If everybody in the US drove west, could we temporarily halt continental drift?"''
<div align="right">—Derek</div>
|No. While technically the car fleet could reverse the momentum of the North American plate, the continental drift is being powered by the forces in the Earth's mantle, and these forces outmatch the car fleet by millions of times.
|{{blog|41|2013|04|16}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Longest Sunset.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|42|Longest Sunset}}'''
|''"What is the longest possible sunset you can experience while driving, assuming we are obeying the speed limit and driving on paved roads?"''
<div align="right">—Michael Berg</div>
|The longest way you can experience a sunset while driving is on certain roads in Norway and Finland around the winter solstice for 95 minutes, as this is where the best method to outpace the Sun works (outpacing {{w|Terminator (solar)|the terminator}}). The answer references comic [[162: Angular Momentum]].
|{{blog|42|201304|23}}
|{{book|1|52}}
|{{book|32|2025|10|21|U8F7UNK9jco|Can you drive west to lengthen the sunset?}}
|-
|[[File:Train Loop.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|43|Train Loop}}'''
|''"Could a high-speed train run through a vertical loop, like a rollercoaster, with the passengers staying comfortable?"''
<div align="right">—Gero Walter</div>
|Even if we change the requirements to just the passengers surviving, this isn't plausible. A train can't complete a full loop without the loop being too small, making the train move too fast and making every passenger die from the g-forces involved.
|{{blog|43|2013|04|30}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:High Throw.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|44|High Throw}}'''
|''"How high can a human throw something?"''
<div align="right">—Irish Dave on the Isle of Man</div>
|Based on estimations and aerodynamics calculations, Aroldis Chapman (holder of the record for fastest pitch) could probably throw up to 16 giraffes (80 m) high if he were using a golf ball. Unless you count letting go of balloons, of course.
|{{blog|44|2013|05|07}}
|{{book|1|38}}
|
|-
|[[File:ISS Music Video.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|45|ISS Music Video}}'''
|''"Is [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KaOC9danxNo '''this'''] the most expensive music video ever?"''
<div align="right">—Various Youtube commenters</div>
|No. If the construction cost of the setpiece is how this is measured, then it would be U2's "Last Night on Earth" on a section of Interstate Highway. If not, then it doesn't even come close to Thriller.
|{{blog|45|2013|05|14}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Bowling Ball.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|46|Bowling Ball}}'''
|''"I've been told that if the Earth were shrunk down to the size of a bowling ball, it would be smoother than said bowling ball. My question is, what would a bowling ball look like if it were blown up to the size of the Earth?"''
<div align="right">—Seth C.</div>
|A bowling ball the size of the Earth would be much less dense, and have much less gravity. The surface bumps and ridges would be much smaller than those on Earth with a maximally rough ball having peaks of roughly 200 m. The finger holes, on the other hand, would be huge, about a thousand km across and several thousand km deep. Due to this, the finger holes would collapse. causing eruptions of hydrocarbons and scars similar to those on the Moon.
|{{blog|46|2013|05|21}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Alien Astronomers.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|47|Alien Astronomers}}'''
|''"Let's assume there's life on the the nearest habitable exoplanet and that they have technology comparable to ours. If they looked at our star right now, what would they see?"''
<div align="right">—Chuck H.</div>
|They wouldn't be able to see us very well. Radio waves fade quickly in space and we've stopped sending out as many of them. If they happened to pick up, they would only get a message similar to the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wow!_signal Wow! Signal]. The best message they could see is visible light, as the water and weather on Earth's surface would be a telltale marker of some form of life.
|{{blog|47|2013|05|28}}
|{{book|1|28}}
|
|-
|[[File:Sunset on the British Empire.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|48|Sunset on the British Empire}}'''
|''"When (if ever) did the Sun finally set on the British Empire?"''
<div align="right">—Kurt Amundson</div>
|If the British Empire kept the borders it had when the question was written, it would continue to experience eternal sunshine for many thousands of years until a total eclipse hits the Pitcairn Islands at the right time.

However, in 2025, after the publication of this article, [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/clyvv04wk8zt the UK signed a treaty to give the British Indian Ocean Territory to Mauritius]. Once the treaty is ratified, and the territory is officially handed over, the Sun can finally set on the British Empire.
|{{blog|48|2013|06|04}}
|{{book|1|60}}
|
|-
|[[File:Sunless Earth.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|49|Sunless Earth}}'''
|''"What would happen to the Earth if the Sun suddenly switched off?"''
<div align="right">—Many, many readers</div>
|We would see a variety of benefits across our lives such as the elimination of time zones, more reliable satellites, easier astronomy, and safer wild parsnip, but the downside is we would all freeze and die.
|{{blog|49|2013|06|11}}
|{{book|1|57}}
|{{book|24|2025|04|15|X7sbn9LMZOg| What if the sun suddenly went out?}}
|-
|[[File:Extreme Boating.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|50|Extreme Boating}}'''
|''"What would it be like to navigate a rowboat through a lake of mercury? What about bromine? Liquid gallium? Liquid tungsten? Liquid nitrogen? Liquid helium?"''
<div align="right">—Nicholas Aron</div>
|It would be difficult to row the boat on mercury because it's very dense. Bromine smells terrible and is highly toxic. Gallium would dissolve an aluminium boat. Liquid tungsten would incinerate you instantly. Liquid nitrogen would kill you either by suffocation or hypothermia. Liquid helium's superfluid properties would sink your boat, but at least you'd hear the “third sound” as you die.
|{{blog|50|2013|06|18}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Free Fall.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|51|Free Fall}}'''
|''"What place on Earth would allow you to freefall the longest by jumping off it? What about using a squirrel suit?"''
<div align="right">—Dhash Shrivathsa</div>
|It takes 26 seconds to fall from the top of {{w|Mount Thor}} into a pit of cotton candy at the bottom of the cliff. The record for the longest wingsuit glide is 3 minutes and 20 seconds, from the {{w|Eiger}} – enough time for Joey Chestnut and Takeru Kobayashi to eat 45 hot dogs.
|{{blog|51|2013|06|25}}
|{{book|1|45}}
|
|-
|[[File:Bouncy Balls.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|52|Bouncy Balls}}'''
|''"What if one were to drop 3,000 bouncy balls from a seven story parking structure onto a person walking on the sidewalk below? Should the person survive, what would be the number of bouncy balls needed to kill them? What injuries would occur and what would the associated crimes be?"''
<div align="right">—Ginger Bread</div>
|If you dropped 3000 balls as stated, the balls would spread out like a cloud, and most of them would miss, with the remainder striking the target separately from one another. Around 3,000,000 balls would be enough to either crush a person or bury them too deep for them to get out. Death would occur and you would be charged with manslaughter or murder.
|{{blog|52|2013|07|02}}
|
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |[[File:Drain the Oceans.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|53|Drain the Oceans}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"How quickly would the ocean's drain if a circular portal 10 meters in radius leading into space was created at the bottom of Challenger Deep, the deepest spot in the ocean? How would the Earth change as the water is being drained?"''
<div align="right">—Ted M.</div>
| rowspan="2" |Hundreds of thousands of years, so you'll need a bigger portal. As their basins are cut off, many shallow seas and a few deep trenches remain, leaving much of Earth still covered with water. Massive, unpredictable environmental changes would probably wipe out mankind. If they didn't, the Dutch would take over the world, no longer preoccupied with preventing their lands from flooding as they are now.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|53|2013|07|09}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|48}}
|{{book|12|2024|06|18|Jpy55EgMQgY|What if you drained the oceans?}}
|-
|{{book|17|short-video=yes|2025|12|16|aMshLs0YCTQ|What if you drained the oceans?}}
|-
| rowspan="2" |[[File:Drain the Oceans Part II.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|54|Drain the Oceans: Part II}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"Supposing you did '''{{what if|53|Drain the Oceans}}''', and dumped the water on top of the Curiosity rover, how would Mars change as the water accumulated?"''
<div align="right">—Iain</div>
| rowspan="2" |The water would fill the {{w|Valles Marineris}}, eventually leaving only {{w|Olympus Mons}} and some other small islands. The sea would ultimately freeze over, become covered in dust, and migrate to permafrost at the poles. In the meantime, the Netherlands would colonize Mars through the portal. The video additionally mentions that the greenhouse gas effects caused by all the new water might keep Mars's oceans liquid.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|54|2013|07|16}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|49}}
|{{book|14|2024|08|13|FkUNHhVbQ1Q|What if we teleported the oceans to Mars?}}
|-
|{{book|18|short-video=yes|2025|12|23|2p305nzcVQE|What if we teleported the oceans to Mars?}}
|-
|[[File:Random Sneeze Call.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|55|Random Sneeze Call}}'''
|''"If you call a random phone number and say "God bless you", what are the chances that the person who answers just sneezed? On average, not just in spring or fall."''
<div align="right">—Mimi</div>
|The chances they just sneezed are 1 in 40000. There's also a 1 in a billion chance that the person you called just murdered someone, a 1 in 10 trillion chance they've just been killed by lightning, and – if five people spend a day trying this by calling random people – another 1 in 10 trillion chance that you and the other person called each other simultaneously.
|{{blog|55|2013|07|23}}
|{{book|1|53}}
|
|-
|[[File:Restraining an Airplane.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|56|Restraining an Airplane}}'''
|''"If you wanted to anchor an airplane into the ground so it wouldn't be able to take off, what would the rope have to be made out of?"''
<div align="right">—Connor Childerhose</div>
|A steel cable an inch thick, the lines of an army of thosands of fishermen, or the hair of 20 people. Hair has the highest tensile strength of any material in your body.
|{{blog|56|2013|07|30}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Dropping a Mountain.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|57|Dropping a Mountain}}'''
|''"What if a huge mountain—Denali, say—had the bottom inch of its base disappear? What would happen from the impact of the mountain falling 1 inch? What about 1 foot? What if the mountain's base were raised to the present height of the summit, and then the whole thing were allowed to drop to the earth?"''
<div align="right">—John-Clark Levin</div>
|An inch or a foot wouldn't do much, it would only feel like a 3.5 magnitude earthquake. Dropped from its own height, Denali would cause a magnitude 7 earthquake and crush coal to diamonds. Dropped from the edge of Earth's gravity well, that's just a large asteroid (roughly 10% of the energy of the Chicxulub impact that caused the {{w|Cretaceous-Paleogene extinction event}}) and it would cause firestorms and an impact winter. If you removed it from Earth's gravity well but still tried to "drop" it, it might crash into Mars instead.
|{{blog|57|2013|08|06}}
|
|
|-
| rowspan="3" |[[File:Orbital Speed.png|100px]]
| rowspan="3" |'''{{What If|58|Orbital Speed}}'''
|''"What if a spacecraft slowed down on re-entry to just a few miles per hour using rocket boosters like the Mars-sky-crane? Would it negate the need for a heat shield?"''
<div align="right">—Brian</div>
| rowspan="3" |No, because you need to go 8 km/s to stay in orbit, and it would take impossible amounts of fuel to slow down. The Curiosity rover used a heat shield for most of its deceleration and then used the sky crane for finer maneuvering relatively close to the ground.
| rowspan="3"{{blog|58|2013|08|12|1d early}}
| rowspan="3"{{book|1|43}}
| rowspan="3" |
|-
|''"Is it possible for a spacecraft to control its reentry in such a way that it avoids the atmospheric compression and thus would not require the expensive (and relatively fragile) heat shield on the outside?"''
<div align="right">—Christopher Mallow</div>
|-
|''"Could a (small) rocket (with payload) be lifted to a high point in the atmosphere where it would only need a small rocket to get to escape velocity?"''
<div align="right">—Kenny Van de Maele</div>
|-
| rowspan="2" |[[File:Updating a Printed Wikipedia.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|59|Updating a Printed Wikipedia}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"If you had a printed version of the whole of (say, the English) Wikipedia, how many printers would you need in order to keep up with the changes made to the live version?"''
<div align="right">—Susanne Könings</div>
| rowspan="2" |You'd need six printers, but if using an ink printer, costs would rack up to $500,000 a month, dwarfing paper and maintenance costs. You'd need to file away past versions in case they were reverted (restored), which would be a nightmare.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|59|2013|08|20|1d late}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|58}}
|{{book|13|2024|7|9|RgBYohJ7mIk|What if you tried to print Wikipedia?}}
|-
|{{book|19|short-video=yes|2026|01|27|WQTNLuhfkwk|What if you printed all of Wikipedia?}}
|-
|[[File:Signs of Life.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|60|Signs of Life}}'''
|''"If you could teleport to a random place of the surface of the Earth, what are the odds that you'll see signs of intelligent life?"''
<div align="right">—Borislav Stanimirov</div>
|70% of the time you would end up in the ocean. Restricting yourself to land, you'd see farmlands or dirt roads about 20-25% of the time (6-7% overall). But if it’s night, you can see satellites just by looking up.
|{{blog|60|2013|08|27}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Speed Bump.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|61|Speed Bump}}'''
|''"How fast can you hit a speed bump while driving and live?"''
<div align="right">—Myrlin Barber</div>
|At highway speeds, you could wreck your tires and suspension. Around 150-300 mph, the aerodynamics of a typical sedan will cause it to flip and crash before even reaching the speed bump. At 90% the speed of light, you could face a billion-dollar speeding ticket.
|{{blog|61|2013|09|03}}
|{{book|1|41}}
|
|-
|[[File:Falling With Helium.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|62|Falling With Helium}}'''
|''"What if I jumped out of an airplane with a couple of tanks of helium and one huge, un-inflated balloon? Then, while falling, I release the helium and fill the balloon. How long of a fall would I need in order for the balloon to slow me enough that I could land safely?"''
<div align="right">—Colin Rowe</div>
|You would need either an air-filled balloon at least 10 to 20 meters across to slow your fall, or 10 helium tanks that are 250 cubic feet. You'd only have a few minutes though, and starting from a higher place will not help much due to your higher terminal velocity in the thin atmosphere.
|{{blog|62|2013|09|10}}
|{{book|1|34}}
|
|-
|[[File:Google's Datacenters on Punch Cards.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|63|Google's Datacenters on Punch Cards}}'''
|''"If all digital data were stored on punch cards, how big would Google's data warehouse be?"''
<div align="right">—James Zetlin</div>
|Using electric consumption and datacenter spending as a measuring stick, Google probably has around 1-2 million servers, which equates to around 15 exabytes (or 15,000,000,000,000,000,000 bytes). Assuming a punch card holds 80 characters, all of that data comes out a pile of punch cards that could cover New England to a depth of 4.5 kilometers/2.8 miles, 3x deeper than the ice sheets that covered the region during the most recent ice age.
|{{blog|63|2013|09|17}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Rising Steadily.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|64|Rising Steadily}}'''
|''"If you suddenly began rising steadily at one foot per second, how exactly would you die? Would you freeze or suffocate first? Or something else?"''
<div align="right">—Rebecca B</div>
|A nudist would survive for five hours, then succumb to the cold. With a good coat, one would survive for seven, even plausibly eight, until reaching the low-oxygen {{w|death zone}} and suffocating. However, your corpse would outlast the Earth as it was swallowed by the Sun.
|{{blog|64|2013|09|24}}
|{{book|1|15}}
|{{book|37|2026|3|3|oTzW-mTQd5w|What if you floated upwards 1 ft every second?}}
|-
|[[File:Twitter Timeline Height.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|65|Twitter Timeline Height}}'''
|''"If our Twitter timelines (tweets by the people we follow) actually extended off the screen in both directions, how tall would they be?"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|It's difficult to pin down an "average" for Twitter timeline lengths, as it greatly depends on how many people you follow and whom. An estimate by Diego Basch and the Tweet rate as of 2013 suggests that if everyone followed everyone, the section timeline extending to the past would have 345 billion tweets and be 8,000,000 kilometers (5,000,000 miles) tall. Using extrapolation techniques similar to those used in the {{w|German tank problem}}, the future and past timelines combined would likely contain 690 billion tweets.
|{{blog|65|2013|10|01}}
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|-
|[[File:500 MPH.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|66|500 MPH}}'''
|''"If winds reached 500 mph, would it pick up a human?"''
<div align="right">—Grey Flynn, age 7, Stoneham, MA</div>
|500 mph winds are more than fast enough to pick up a person and propel them through the air. The speed at which the wind starts being able to pick up and propel a person is around 120 mph. In fact, 500 mph winds are so fast that they only occur on Earth in extreme situations like the immediate vicinity of an erupting volcano or the aftermath of a major asteroid impact at which point wind speed would only be one of many dangers to human survival.
|{{blog|66|2013|10|08}}
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| rowspan="2" |[[File:Expanding Earth.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|67|Expanding Earth}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"How long would it take for people to notice their weight gain if the mean radius of the world expanded by 1cm every second? (Assuming the average composition of rock were maintained.)"''
<div align="right">—Dennis O’Donnell</div>
| rowspan="2" |After a month, the gain would be measurable but within the normal variation of gravity. After a year, it would be more prominent at 5%. Humans could survive with difficulty for a decade, but even in specially-built environments, they would succumb within a century as air itself became toxic from atmospheric pressure. After a few centuries, the Moon would fall into the Roche limit and crumble into rings.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|67|2013|10|15}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|55}}
|{{book|17|2024|10|15|-1-ldW4kpLM|What if Earth grew 1cm every second?}}
|-
|{{book|6|short-video=yes|2025|08|05|5k8ciEx__5w|Circumference pop quiz!}}
|-
|[[File:Little Planet.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|68|Little Planet}}'''
|''"If an asteroid was very small but supermassive, could you really live on it like the Little Prince?"''
<div align="right">—Samantha Harper</div>
|Technically, yes. However, there would be major challenges. For one, gravity would be at full strength at your feet, but only 25% strength at your head, giving the illusion that you're being stretched. You would only need to be able to dunk a basketball to jump out of the gravity well, or you could alternatively sprint at 5 meters per second; if you don't make it to that point, you would enter a highly irregular orbit during which tidal forces would pull on your body in strange ways.
|{{blog|68|2013|10|22}}
|{{book|1|22}}
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|-
|[[File:Facebook of the Dead.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|69|Facebook of the Dead}}'''
|''"When, if ever, will Facebook contain more profiles of dead people than of living ones?"''
<div align="right">—Emily Dunham</div>
|This depends on if Facebook stays popular or declines in popularity over time. In the former case, the dead would only outnumber the living well into the 2100s; while in the latter, this happens around 2060. Facebook can afford to keep all our data indefinitely, but there are ethical questions.
|{{blog|69|2013|10|29}}
|{{book|1|59}}
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|-
|[[File:The Constant Groundskeeper.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|70|The Constant Groundskeeper}}'''
|''"How big of a lawn would you have to have so that when you finished mowing you'd need to start over because the grass has grown?"''
<div align="right">—Nick Nelson</div>
|A normal, standard-issue mower running for 10 hours straight could cut an area of 25,000 square meters, or 27,000 yards; the ideal frequency to cut your lawn is once every 10 days, which means that 0.25 km² of lawn can be maintained by 10 hours of mowing every day [or 0.6 km² by mowing it constantly]. Using a much faster mower commissioned by the magazine ''Top Gear'' that is used all day, every day, it could cut an adult male cougar's home range (which [https://wdfw.wa.gov/species-habitats/species/puma-concolor#:~:text=Adult%20male%20cougars%20roam%20widely,terrain%2C%20and%20availability%20of%20prey. the Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife] reports as 50-150 square miles or 130-390 square kilometers).
|{{blog|70|2013|11|05}}
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|[[File:Stirring Tea.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|71|Stirring Tea}}'''
|''"I was absentmindedly stirring a cup of hot tea, when I got to thinking, "aren't I actually adding kinetic energy into this cup?" I know that stirring does help to cool down the tea, but what if I were to stir it faster? Would I be able to boil a cup of water by stirring?"''
<div align="right">—Will Evans</div>
|No, not really. It would take at least 1 horsepower (a lot for a person stirring), and reducing the power would just make it cool faster. Stirring faster and faster would cause a vacuum to form and stirring to become ineffective (and the tea would splash out everywhere).
|{{blog|71|2013|11|12}}
|{{book|1|61}}
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|-
|[[File:Loneliest Human.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|72|Loneliest Human}}'''
|''"What is the furthest one human being has ever been from every other living person? Were they lonely?"''
<div align="right">—Bryan J. McCarter</div>
|The most well-documented candidates are the six Apollo astronauts piloting the Command Module orbiting the Moon while their fellow astronauts descended on the surface, at most 3585 km away. Antarctic explorers and pre-colonialism Polynesian explorers have a shot, but there's no good evidence of specific people who beat the Apollo record. Astronauts Mike Collins and Al Worden said they were not at all lonely, the latter even enjoying his solitude.
|{{blog|72|2013|11|19}}
|{{book|1|63}}
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|-
|[[File:Lethal Neutrinos.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|73|Lethal Neutrinos}}'''
|''"How close would you have to be to a supernova to get a lethal dose of neutrino radiation?"''
<div align="right">—(Overheard in a physics department)</div>
|Neutrinos are subatomic particles that barely interact with the universe at all, so it's hard to imagine a scenario where they could harm you, even in a supernova. But at about 2.3 AU, or a little farther than Mars is from the Sun, even the neutrinos would be dense enough to kill you. On the other hand, if you were that close, you were probably inside the star that created the supernova, in which case ''[[#115|Into the Sun]]'' would apply.
|{{blog|73|2013|11|26}}
|{{book|1|39}}
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|-
|[[File:Soda Planet.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|74|Soda Planet}}'''
|''"How much of the Earth's currently-existing water has ever been turned into a soft drink at some point in its history?"''
<div align="right">—Brian Roelofs</div>
|Humans have likely consumed 6.5 trillion liters or 1.7 trillion gallons of soda ever, based on estimates of population growth and popularity of soda. Assuming humanity has drunk 100 trillion liters (26 trillion gallons) of water, it is reasonable to conclude that only 0.0000005% of Earth's current water reservoir has been turned into a soft drink. However, considering how long water takes to cycle around and certain prehistoric life forms, the water in the average soda was likely once consumed by a dinosaur.
|{{blog|74|2013|12|03}}
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|[[File:Phone Keypad.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|75|Phone Keypad}}'''
|''"I use one of those old phones where you type with numbers—for example, to type "Y", you press 9 three times. Some words have consecutive letters on the same number. When they do, you have to pause between letters, making those words annoying to type. What English word has the most consecutive letters on the same key?"''
<div align="right">—Stewart Bishop</div>
|According to Randall, the English word with the most consecutive letters on the same key is "Nonmonogamous". This would require you to type the 6 key (MNO) 16 times without stopping, in order to type 'nonmono'. With every letter included, typing this word would require pressing the 2, 4, 7, and 8 keys once each, and the 6 key a nice, even 20 times. However, Randall is wrong. The actual word with most consecutive letters on the same key is 'nonmonomolecular'. In order to type 'nonmonomo', you need to hit the 6 key a full 20 times. However, typing the full word wouldn't add any more presses of the 6 key, so it takes the same amount of 6 to type the full word as nonmonogamous.
|{{blog|75|2013|12|10}}
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|[[File:Reading Every Book.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|76|Reading Every Book}}'''
|''"At what point in human history were there too many (English) books to be able to read them all in one lifetime?"''
<div align="right">—Gregory Willmot</div>
|About the 1500s, as the population of active English writers reached a few hundred, meaning you would never be able to catch up (using the average word count for a few famous authors as a baseline). You might not want to read them, anyways.
|{{blog|76|2013|12|17}}
|{{book|2|10}}
|
|-
|[[File:Growth Rate.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|77|Growth Rate}}'''
|''"What height would humans reach if we kept growing through our whole development period (i.e. till late teens/early twenties) at the same pace as we do during our first month?"''
<div align="right">—Maria</div>
|We would reach 10 to 12 meters at age 20, though the human body is not scalable to those heights, as our bone structure is too thin, while our hearts wouldn't be able to pump the blood around.
|{{blog|77|2013|12|31|7d late}}
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|[[File:T-rex Calories.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|78|T-rex Calories}}'''
|''"If a T-rex were released in New York City, how many humans/day would it need to consume to get its needed calorie intake?"''
<div align="right">—Tony Schmitz</div>
|Estimates vary, but the T-rex was estimated to need 40,000 calories per day. Ryan North of Dinosaur Comics tells us that the average 80 kg/175 pound human [http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=QW-PERSON&Category_Code=QW contains 110,000 calories]. Therefore, a T-rex would need to eat someone every 2 days or so. On the other hand, a T-rex wouldn't necessarily have to use humans specifically as a food source and could instead eat 80 hamburgers a day.
|{{blog|78|2014|01|07}}
|{{book|2|7|T. Rex Calories}}
|
|-
|[[File:Lake Tea.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|79|Lake Tea}}'''
|''"What if we were to dump all the tea in the world into the Great Lakes? How strong, compared to a regular cup of tea, would the lake tea be?"''
<div align="right">—Alex Burman</div>
|An average cup of tea requires 2 grams of tea per 100 mL of water, and to make proper tea out of the Great Lakes, you would need 450 billion tons of tea for the Great Lakes' 22,600 cubic kilometers/5400 cubic miles of water. A total year's supply of tea is only 4.8 million tons, which would make tea about as strong as 2 drops in a bathtub. To make proper lake tea, you could use Wular Lake in Kashmir or Ullswater in UK's lake district, due to the volume of both being small enough for the tea to work. Heating those lakes to proper steeping temperature would likely be quite difficult, so Boiling Lake in Dominica or Frying Pan Lake in New Zealand could also be good candidates as they're already hot.
|{{blog|79|2014|01|14}}
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|[[File:Pile of Viruses.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|80|Pile of Viruses}}'''
|''"What if every virus in the world were collected into one area? How much volume would they take up and what would they look like?"''
<div align="right">—Dave</div>
|''Human'' viruses would fill about ten oil drums. ''All'' viruses would form a wet heap the size of a small mountain, with a texture resembling pus or meat slurry. The viruses are likely to have a small angle of repose, so to avoid having the pile collapse and flood the surrounding area, all the viruses could instead be contained in 150 football stadiums.
|{{blog|80|2014|01|21}}
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|[[File:Catch!.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|81|Catch!}}'''
|''"Is there any way to fire a gun so that the bullet flies through the air and can then be safely caught by hand? e.g. shooter is at sea level and catcher is up a mountain at the extreme range of the gun."''
<div align="right">—Ed Hui, London</div>
|Yes, eventually the bullet would come to a maximum height, at which point you could grab the bullet before it fell down. You'd need to grip it firmly, because the bullet would still have its rotational momentum and might jump out of your hand. A larger bullet would require a larger height to catch it at, and even then, it would still be difficult to grab. Of course, this is illegal and can injure you or other people.
|{{blog|81|2014|01|28}}
|{{book|2|12}}
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|-
|[[File:Hitting a comet.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|82|Hitting a comet}}'''
|''"Astrophysicists are always saying things like "This mission to this comet is equivalent to throwing a baseball from New York and hitting a particular window in San Francisco." Are they really equivalent?"''
<div align="right">—Tom Foster</div>
|The baseball thing is much harder. You'd have to hit it out of the atmosphere, and a baseball is too small to do that. Even if you could, it's still not a fair comparison because astrophysicists are allowed to refine their approach as they close in on the target, which you can't do with a thrown baseball. It turns out that the comet mission requires about the same level of precision as laser eye surgery.
|{{blog|82|2014|02|05|1d late}}
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|[[File:Star Sand.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|83|Star Sand}}'''
|''"If you made a beach using grains the proportionate size of the stars in the Milky Way, what would that beach look like?"''
<div align="right">—Jeff Wartes</div>
|Although red giants aren't as common as Sun-like stars or red dwarfs, they would form a stretch of gravel that went on for miles due to their large relative volume. 99% of all stars would form a small patch of sand.
|{{blog|83|2014|02|11|1d early}}
|{{book|2|16}}
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|-
|[[File:Paint the Earth.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|84|Paint the Earth}}'''
|''"Has humanity produced enough paint to cover the entire land area of the Earth?"''
<div align="right">—Josh (Bolton, MA)</div>
|There isn't enough paint to go around. The total estimated amount of produced paint, a trillion litres, is only enough to paint as much as the land area of Russia.
|{{blog|84|2014|02|18}}
|{{book|2|14}}
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|-
|[[File:Rocket Golf.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|85|Rocket Golf}}'''
|''"Assuming that you have a spaceship in orbit around the Earth, could you propel your ship to speeds exceeding escape velocity by hitting golf balls in the other direction? If so, how many golf balls would be required to reach the Moon?"''
<div align="right">—Dan (Kanata, Ontario)</div>
|A person theoretically ''could'' propel your ship using golf balls, but, assuming they are being fired at 226 mph (363 km/h), the fastest world record, the amount of golf balls needed for this would be around the size of Earth and wouldn't even get you to the Moon. (An ordinary golfer hitting the ball at 120 mph (50 km/h) would need a bag of golf balls bigger than the solar system that would collapse into a black hole and be even more unusable.) You'd need a potato cannon fueled by acetylene firing golf balls at 310 mph (500 km/h) which reduces the size of the golf mass to 150 miles (240 kilometers). This would be incredibly costly and firing them faster would essentially be the same as building a normal rocket.
|{{blog|85|2014|02|25}}
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|[[File:Far-Traveling Objects.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|86|Far-Traveling Objects}}'''
|''"In terms of human-made objects, has Voyager 1 travelled the farthest distance? It's certainly the farthest from Earth we know about. But what about the edge of ultracentrifuges, or generator turbines that have been running for years, for example?"''
<div align="right">—Matt Russell</div>
|There are a few different frames of reference you can look at, but in normal terms Mariner 10 has traveled much farther than Voyager 1. It's travelled a couple of light-days around the Sun, while the Voyager probes have only travelled a dozen light-hours.
|{{blog|86|2014|03|04}}
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|[[File:Enforced by Radar.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|87|Enforced by Radar}}'''
|''"I've occasionally seen "radar enforced" on speed limit signs, and I can't help but ask: How intense would radio waves have to be to stop a car from going over the speed limit, and what would happen if this were attempted?"''
<div align="right">—Joausc</div>
|Radio waves are generally ''very weak''. You'd need the collective energy of trillions of cell phones just to levitate a snow flake. To stop a car, you'd need at least 2 trillion joules of radiation, which would vaporize the car and everything else around it.
|{{blog|87|2014|03|11}}
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|[[File:Soda Sequestration.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|88|Soda Sequestration}}'''
|''"How much CO2 is contained in the world's stock of bottled fizzy drinks? How much soda would be needed to bring atmospheric CO2 back to preindustrial levels?"''
<div align="right">—Brandon Seah</div>
|There are currently 400 parts of carbon dioxide per million. To bring it down to pre-Industrial levels, you'd need 450 quadrillion cans of soda, each being able to hold 2.2 grams of CO2. This would cover Earth's land 10 times over.
|{{blog|88|2014|03|18}}
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|[[File:Tungsten Countertop.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|89|Tungsten Countertop}}'''
|''"How far would a tungsten countertop descend if I dropped it into the Sun?"''
<div align="right">—Michael Leuchtenburg</div>
|Tungsten has the highest melting point of any element, but even tungsten would melt before it got too far. If you protected it with a heat shield, it would get destroyed all the same by the battering of the particles in the Sun's atmosphere. It could possibly penetrate the surface if it was larger, but as it stands, it wouldn't get past the outer layers.
|{{blog|89|2014|03|25}}
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|[[File:Great Tree, Great Axe.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|90|Great Tree, Great Axe}}'''
|''"If all the seas were one sea,''
''What a great sea that would be!''
''If all the trees were one tree,''
''What a great tree that would be!''
''If all the men were one man,''
''What a great man that would be!''
''If all the axes were one axe,''
''What a great axe that would be!''
''And if the great man took the great axe,''
''And cut down the great tree,''
''And let if fall into the great sea,''
''What a great splish-splash that would be!''

''... How great would all of these things be?"''
<div align="right">—John Eifert (quoting a ''Mother Goose'' rhyme)</div>
|The seas would be a little bigger than the Pacific Ocean. Trees can't grow taller than about 130 meters naturally, and would physically crush itself if above a few kilometers tall. Ignoring these restraints, the tree would be about 75 km tall with trunk diameter of 2 km. Ignoring human size restraints, the person would be close to 3 km tall. The axe would be about 500 meters long and relatively the size of a flimsy hatchet. It may take a few weeks to chop down the tree and the impact would create a tsunami that probably wouldn't wipe out the human race, but would be likely the deadliest single disaster in our history.
|{{blog|90|2014|04|03|2d late}}
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|[[File:Faucet Power.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|91|Faucet Power}}'''
|''"I just moved into a new apartment. It includes hot water but I have to pay the electric bill. So being a person on a budget ... what's the best way to use my free faucet to generate electricity?"''
<div align="right">—David Axel Kurtz</div>
|A small hydroelectric dam in the bathtub would yield about $0.25 per month of electricity, but the best option would probably be to bottle and sell your tap water, yielding about $38 million per year at $1.50 per bottle.
|{{blog|91|2014|04|08|2d early}}
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|[[File:One-Second Day.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|92|One-Second Day}}'''
|''"What would happen if the Earth's rotation were sped up until a day only lasted one second?"''
<div align="right">—Dylan</div>
|Everything on Earth would die, but if it happened when the Moon crosses the plane of the Earth, then everything in the Solar System will die (whether there is a difference is debatable).
|{{blog|92|2014|04|15}}
|{{book|2|21}}
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|[[File:Windshield Raindrops.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|93|Windshield Raindrops}}'''
|''"At what speed would you have to drive for rain to shatter your windshield?"''
<div align="right">—Daniel Butler</div>
|Water droplets in air are normally lighter than the air, so this wouldn't happen under normal circumstances. However, at supersonic speeds, the water droplet would jet away from the impact point on the windshield at Mach 18. It wouldn't shatter the windshield, but it would slowly batter it away. If you really want to have your windshield broken by precipitation, it would probably be easier to find a hailstorm and drive under it.
|{{blog|93|2014|04|22}}
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| rowspan="3" |[[File:Billion-Story Building.png|100px]]
| rowspan="3" |'''{{What If|94|Billion-Story Building}}'''
| rowspan="3" |''"My daughter — age 4.5 — maintains she wants a billion-story building. It turns out not only is that hard to help her appreciate this size, I am not at all able to explain all of the other difficulties you'd have to overcome."''
<div align="right">—Keira, via Steve Brodovicz, Media, PA </div>
| rowspan="3" |The tower would be far too big to support itself under its own weight. The tower would also extend past the Moon. The sheer amount of elevators needed would provide little to no room for actual usable space. Additionally, space junk would be a large problem, as there is a high probability that space junk would collide with the tower.
| rowspan="3" {{blog|94|2014|04|29}}
| rowspan="3" {{book|2|22}}
|{{book|21|2025|02|11|Z_xJ40QXu7Q|What if you built a billion-story building?}}
|-
|{{book|21|short-video=yes|2026|02|17|J-E8rjWR9rM|What if we built a billion-story building?}}
|-
|{{book|22|short-video=yes|2026|02|24|oMtAHGv-DU4|How many elevators would you need in a billion-story building?}}
|-
|[[File:Pyramid Energy.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|95|Pyramid Energy}}'''
|''"What took more energy, the building of the Great Pyramid of Giza or the Apollo Mission? If we could convert the energy to build the Great Pyramid, would it be enough to send a rocket to the Moon and back?"''
<div align="right">—Michael Marmol</div>
|The Apollo Program took about the same manpower as the building of the Great Pyramids, but physics wise, the Great Pyramid only contains 10<sup>12</sup> joules of gravitational potential energy. A single Saturn V rocket's fuel has 20 times more energy.
|{{blog|95|2014|05|06}}
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|[[File:$2 Undecillion Lawsuit.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|96|$2 Undecillion Lawsuit}}'''
|''"What if Au Bon Pain lost '''[http://www.loweringthebar.net/2014/05/2-undecillion-dollar-demand.html this lawsuit]''' and had to pay the plaintiff $2 undecillion?"''
<div align="right">—Kevin Underhill</div>
|The debt would be incredibly great, to the point that everything ever created by man does not have enough value to pay it off. For comparison, former solicitor general Ted Olson leaked that he charges $1600 per hour for his services. Even if every habitable planet in the Milky Way had a population of 8 billion Ted Olsons, and you hired all of them for a thousand generations, the cost would still be lower than if you lost.
|{{blog|96|2014|05|14|1d late}}
|{{book|2|23}}
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|[[File:Burning Pollen.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|97|Burning Pollen}}'''
|''"What if you were to somehow ignite the pollen that floats around in the air in spring? Other than being a really bad idea, what effect would it have?"''
<div align="right">—Jessica Thornburg</div>
|It would just warm up the air by a very tiny bit, but only because it's so thinly spread. Gathering all of it from a large enough region into one pile could equal a nuclear weapon.
|{{blog|97|2014|05|20|1d early}}
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|[[File:Blood Alcohol.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|98|Blood Alcohol}}'''
|''"Could you get drunk from drinking a drunk person's blood?"''
<div align="right">—Fiona Byrne</div>
|No, you can't. Alcohol in a drunk person's blood would be very diluted and by the time you drank the 14 glasses needed to get drunk, you would've vomited on the account of drinking blood. That aside, you could also get iron overload as well as various blood-borne diseases.
|{{blog|98|2014|05|27}}
|{{book|2|42}}
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|-
|[[File:Starlings.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|99|Starlings}}'''
|''"I was watching '''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eakKfY5aHmY this video]''' and was wondering: How many birds there would need to be for gravity to take over and force them into a gargantuan ball of birds?"''
<div align="right">—Justin Basinger</div>
|Each bird is 85 grams, with a density of around 43 grams per square meter. Because of this, the air would be 25 times stronger than the starlings and the substance governing the collapse. The air would have to be bigger than the Earth to collapse the starlings and the starlings themselves would need to be bigger than the Solar System. They would then promptly turn into a star.
|{{blog|99|2014|06|03}}
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|[[File:WWII Films.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|100|WWII Films}}'''
|''"Did WWII last longer than the total length of movies about WWII? For that matter, which war has the highest movie time:war time ratio?"''
<div align="right">—Becky</div>
|Assuming the average run time of a WWII film was 95 minutes, the combined length was 300 days, meaning World War II was longer than the movies 7 times over. The two most likely candidates for highest movie:war ratio are the Indo-Pakistani war, which lasted 13 days and has 5 catalogued films about it, and the Anglo-Zanzibar war, which only lasted 38 minutes but lacked any films. In 2015, someone took Randall's advice and made [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt5954666/ Zanzibar], a short film (31 minutes) that takes the record.
|{{blog|100|2014|06|11|1d late}}
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|[[File:Plastic Dinosaurs.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|101|Plastic Dinosaurs}}'''
|''"As plastic is made from oil and oil is made from dead dinosaurs, how much actual real dinosaur is there in a plastic dinosaur?"''
<div align="right">—Steve Lydford</div>
|Contrary to the name, oil is not made of dead dinosaurs, mostly being composed of marine plankton and algae. Geology is complicated, but the gist is that only a small fraction of a plastic dinosaur toy could've come from dinosaur oil, and depending on the location, it may contain none at all.
|{{blog|101|2014|06|18}}
|{{book|2|26}}
|
|-
|[[File:Keyboard Power.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|102|Keyboard Power}}'''
|''"As a writer, I'm wondering what would be the cumulative energy of the hundreds of thousands of keystrokes required to write a novel."''
<div align="right">—Nicholas Dickner</div>
|Writing one full novel would provide enough energy to run a laptop for 15 seconds. If each novel takes you six months, this would save a fraction of a penny of electricity. To keep a laptop working on just keyboard power, you'd need to write a novel every ten seconds, and to run a microwave would require one novel per second. Typing fast enough to do either would require your fingers to move at relativistic speeds with similar destructive nuclear consequences of objects doing so to those described in {{what if|1|Relativistic Baseball}}.
|{{blog|102|2014|06|25}}
|
|{{book|34|2025|12|02|0L44GEJ5pLE|Can you power your computer by typing?}}
|-
|[[File:Vanishing Water.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|103|Vanishing Water}}'''
|''"What would happen if all the bodies of water on Earth magically disappeared?"''
<div align="right">—Joanna Xu</div>
|If all water vanished, the first to notice would be anybody currently in the ocean, and over the course of a minute, they would all fall, some of them dying but some surviving with minor injuries. After this, all marine life will have perished. Humans follow soon after as the water cycle would've stopped, collapsing global infrustructure and killing every plant and person by dehydration. The end of the water cycle also leads to a runaway greenhouse effect later on.
|{{blog|103|2014|07|02}}
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|[[File:Global Snow.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|104|Global Snow}}'''
|''"From my seven-year-old son: How many snowflakes would it take to cover the entire world in six feet of snow? (I don't know why six feet...but that's what he asked.)"''
<div align="right">—Jed Scott</div>
|Snow isn't very dense, and 1 inch of rain would lead to a foot or more of snow. Factoring in snow compressing throughout the day, you would need a mole of snowflakes to cover the Earth in 6 feet in snow.
|{{blog|104|2014|07|09}}
|{{book|2|59}}
|
|-
|[[File:Cannibalism.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|105|Cannibalism}}'''
|''"How long could the human race survive on only cannibalism?"''
<div align="right">—Quinn Shaffer</div>
|If half of the world eats the other half, then it would take about 32 months before it came down to 2 people. However, this is also a very efficient way to get a {{w|Transmissible spongiform encephalopathy|prion disease}}.
|{{blog|105|2014|07|16}}
|
|{{book|31|2025|09|30|PUtI3xoaHx0|Could we survive eating only humans?}}
|-
|[[File:Ink Molecules.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|106|Ink Molecules}}'''
|''"Suppose you were to print, in 12 point text, the numeral 1 using a common cheap ink-jet printer. How many molecules of the ink would be used? At what numerical value would the number printed approximately equal the number of ink molecules used?"''
<div align="right">—David Pelkey</div>
|You'd use about 100,000,000,000,000,000 molecules.
|{{blog|106|2014|07|23}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:Letter to Mom.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|107|Letter to Mom}}'''
|''"What’s the fastest way to get a hand-written letter from my place in Chicago to my mother in New Jersey?"''
<div align="right">—Tim</div>
|An ICBM would take 12-15 minutes to cross the distance. While that is the best method, a few other methods come close. The Concorde would only take 30 minutes, while firing something with a rail gun down a vacuum tube would take only 10-20 minutes.
|{{blog|107|2014|07|30}}
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|[[File:Expensive Shoebox.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|108|Expensive Shoebox}}'''
|''"What would be the most expensive way to fill a size 11 shoebox (e.g. with 64 GB MicroSD cards all full of legally purchased music)?"''
<div align="right">—Rick Lewis</div>
|There are many options (precious materials, hard drugs, physical file storage, etc.), but they all cap out at ~$2,000,000,000. That amount of platinum would be worth $13 million, while diamonds, Adcetris and LSD would be valued around 1-2 billion. A shoebox full of plutonium would be worth $3 billion, but since it would also have a mass of about 300 kg, which is well over the critical mass, monetary value is unlikely to be its most relevant property to anyone in its immediate vicinity. If the US Treasury ever decides to mint a trillion dollar coin, it could probably then fit in a shoebox, as could a check for an arbitrarily large sum.
|{{blog|108|2014|08|13|7d late}}
|{{book|2|31}}
|
|-
|[[File:Into the Blue.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|109|Into the Blue}}'''
|''"If I shot an infinitely strong laser beam into the sky at a random point, how much damage would it do?"''
<div align="right">—Garrett D.</div>
|Infinitely powerful laser beams do not exist, and if they did, they would vaporize the air and destroy everything like in the ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' article ''{{what if|13|Laser Pointer}}''. That being said, if it were truly random, it would be aimed at Earth 50% of the time. If you miss the Earth, 89,999 times out of 90,000, your beam will pass right out of the galaxy without hitting anything. When it does hit something, it will almost always be the Sun or the Moon.
|{{blog|109|2014|08|20}}
|
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|-
|[[File:Walking New York.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|110|Walking New York}}'''
|''"Could a person walk the entire city of NY in their lifetime? (including inside apartments)"''
<div align="right">—Asif Shamir</div>
|Based on estimates of US Postal Service carriers and their travel times, we know that walking every street in NYC would probably take 14 years. Assuming it takes about 25 seconds to enter an apartment building, leave, and go to the next one, it would only take an additional 10 years to visit every apartment. However, under [http://ypdcrime.com/penal.law/article140.htm New York Penal Code], the punishment would take 2 million years or 2,000 millenia to finish.
|{{blog|110|2014|08|27}}
|
|
|-
|[[File:All the Money.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|111|All the Money}}'''
|''"People sometimes say "If I had all the money in the world ..." in order to discuss what they would do if they had no financial constraints. I'm curious, though, what would happen if one person had all of the world's money?"''
<div align="right">—Daniel Pino</div>
|Currency only makes up a fraction of Earth's money, and it's unlikely people would agree to your sudden claims of ownership over all of the land, nor would they let you spend the actual currency you have. Said currency would quickly crush you, as most of its weight is in coinage. You could build a structure to contain the coins, but this would violate NYC building codes.
|{{blog|111|2014|09|02|1d early}}
|
|{{book|25|2025|05|06|saj7b5C6TCM|What if you literally had all the money in the world?}}
|-
|[[File:Balloon Car.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|112|Balloon Car}}'''
|''"My 12-year-old daughter is proposing an interesting project. She is planning to attach a number of helium balloons to a chair, which in turn would be tethered by means of a rope to a Ferrari. Her 13-year-old friend would then drive the Ferrari around, while she sits in the chair enjoying uninterrupted views of the countryside. Leaving aside the legal and insurance difficulties, my daughter is keen to know the maximum speed that she could expect to attain, and how many helium balloons would be required."''
<div align="right">—Phil Rodgers, Cambridge, UK</div>
|A balloon just big enough to lift you would be pushed down by the wind, and a balloon big enough to counteract that would lift up the car along with you. The way to achieve this result is [https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=parasailing parasailing].
|{{blog|112|2014|09|17|8d late}}
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|[[File:Visit Every State.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|113|Visit Every State}}'''
|''"How fast could you visit all 50 states?"''
<div align="right">—as discussed by Stephen Von Worley <span class="plainlinks">on [http://www.datapointed.net/2012/08/fastest-route-to-visit-all-fifty-united-states/ '''''Data Pointed''''']</span>
|It would take you 160 hours by car, 39 hours by landing a private jet in each state, and 18 hours by F-22 fighter jet and helicopter landing in each state. However, if you relax the requirement to land in each state and simply count entering the state's airspace as "visiting" it, you can do it in around 7 hours with an SR-71 Blackbird. If we allow satellite orbits, you can do it in just over 6 hours with five orbits, assuming your satellite makes a course correction on each orbit.
|{{blog|113|2014|09|24}}
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|[[File:Antimatter.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|114|Antimatter}}'''
|''"What if everything was antimatter, EXCEPT Earth?"''
<div align="right">—Sean Gallagher</div>
|It would wipe out all life on Earth, but surprisingly slower than you might expect. The annihilation of antimatter entering the atmosphere would add enough extra heat to create a runaway greenhouse effect and make Earth similar to Venus. We would be in much more danger from meteorites, with dinosaur-killer equivalents hitting the upper atmosphere every few months.
|{{blog|114|2014|10|01}}
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| rowspan="2" |[[File:Into the Sun.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|115|Into the Sun}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"When I was about 8 years old, shoveling snow on a freezing day in Colorado, I wished that I could be instantly transported to the surface of the Sun, just for a nanosecond, then instantly transported back. I figured this would be long enough to warm me up but not long enough to harm me. What would actually happen?"''
<div align="right">—AJ, Kansas City</div>
| rowspan="2" |You would not be warmed if you went to the surface, as the energy received by your skin would be minimal. You would maybe see a bright flash of light. The core, on the other hand, would vaporize you, as the energy delivered there would be able to give you a second-degree burn after 1 femtosecond (1 millionth of a nanosecond) in the core.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|115|2014|10|08}}
| rowspan="2" {{book|2|61}}
|{{book|15|2024|09|03|UXA-Af-JeCE|Could you survive a nanosecond on the Sun?}}
|-
|{{book|20|short-video=yes|2026|02|03|m1aMh7z8Y7I|What if you teleported to the Sun?}}
|-
| rowspan="3" |[[File:No-Rules NASCAR.png|100px]]
| rowspan="3" |'''{{What If|116|No-Rules NASCAR}}'''
| rowspan="3" |''"If you stripped away all the rules of car racing and had a contest which was simply to get a human being around a track 200 times as fast as possible, what strategy would win? Let's say the racer has to survive."''
<div align="right">—Hunter Freyer</div>
| rowspan="3" |If the rider has to survive, 90 minutes is the limit based on human G-force tolerances. If survival is not a priority, you'd build a particle accelerator.
| rowspan="3" {{blog|116|2014|10|15}}
| rowspan="3" {{book|2|35}}
|{{book|3|2023|12|19|JcXpCyPc2Xw|What if NASCAR had no rules?}}
|-
|{{book|8|short-video=yes|2025|08|26|eSPcp-tfGbA|How fast could a human accellerate (while staying alive)?}}
|-
|{{book|9|short-video=yes|2025|09|02|rgUfcFAPicY|How fast could a vehicle go around a track - but the racer does not have to survive.}}
|-
|[[File:Distant Death.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|117|Distant Death}}'''
|''"What is the farthest from Earth that any Earth thing has died?"''
<div align="right">—Amy from NZ</div>
|The farthest that any human has died is about 167 kilometers. In terms of any living thing, however, bacterial spores on Voyager 1 are dying every few months, setting a new record each time.
|{{blog|117|2014|10|23|1d late}}
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|[[File:Physical Salary.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|118|Physical Salary}}'''
|''"What if people's incomes appeared around them as cash in real time? How much would you need to make to be in real trouble?"''
<div align="right">—Julia Anderson, Albuquerque, NM</div>
|At minimum US wage, a worker would earn about one water bottle of mixed coins per day. A CEO would earn about 600 such bottles per day, and the coins would accumulate on the floor at a rate of about 0.5 inches per day. Mark Zuckerberg would earn 25 such bottles ''per second'', and the coins would bury him if he sat still for an hour.
|{{blog|118|2014|10|30}}
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| rowspan="2" |[[File:Laser Umbrella.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|119|Laser Umbrella}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"Stopping rain from falling on something with an umbrella or a tent is boring. What if you tried to stop rain with a laser that targeted and vaporized each incoming droplet before it could come within ten feet of the ground?"''
<div align="right">—Zach Wheeler</div>
| rowspan="2" |It's doable in theory, but the energy required to completely vaporize a raindrop (rather than merely splattering it) is high enough that your surroundings would get dangerously hot. Targeting the droplets might be possible with adaptive optics, but it would require a complicated device. You could try firing rapidly in random directions instead, but your high-powered laser might go several hundred meters without hitting a raindrop, which would endanger your local neighborhood.
| rowspan="2"{{blog|119|2014|11|13|7d late}}
| rowspan="2"{{book|2|37}}
|{{book|6|2024|02|20|zgBTwtg7H8E|Could you make an umbrella out of lasers?}}
|-
|{{book|15|short-video=yes|2025|11|4|xA9aqKGBeOs|Could you use a laser as an umbrella?}}
|-
|[[File:Alternate Universe What Ifs.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|120|Alternate Universe What Ifs}}'''
|''"Dispatches from a horrifying alternate universe"''
|Excerpts from ''what if?'' articles written in a world which, thankfully, is not the one we live in.
|{{blog|120|2014|11|20}}
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|[[File:Frozen Rivers.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|121|Frozen Rivers}}'''
|''"What would happen if all of the rivers in the US were instantly frozen in the middle of the summer?"''
<div align="right">—Zoe Cutler</div>
|Anywhere with rain or snowmelt would be horrifically flooded, and ice would break, then dam up rivers, forming huge lakes. Humanity would be worse for the wear, but all in all fine. Places where electricity is gotten using a hydroelectric dam may be out of power for a bit, but the flow of water would return in time.
|{{blog|121|2014|12|11}} 14d late)
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|[[File:Lava Lamp.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|122|Lava Lamp}}'''
|''"What if I made a lava lamp out of real lava? What could I use as a clear medium? How close could I stand to watch it?"''
<div align="right">—Kathy Johnstone, 6th Grade Teacher (via a student)</div>
|You would need to use a metal or gemstone with a very high heat tolerance. You could possibly use sapphire or some sort of transparent or translucent tungsten, but the clear medium would eventually fog up and prevent you from seeing the lava. The lava would solidify after approximately a minute without some way to continuously heat it.
|{{blog|122|2014|12|18}}
|{{book|2|40}}
|
|-
|[[File:Fairy Demographics.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|123|Fairy Demographics}}'''
|''"How many fairies would fly around, if each fairy is born from the first laugh of a child and fairies were immortal?"''
<div align="right">—Mira Kühn, Germany</div>
|If fairies appeared with the first laugh of a ''homo sapiens'', there would be around 100 billion fairies, and they, depending on their size, would probably be considered no more than a common pest. Because of their high population, however, they would probably be considered a major part of the ecosystems where they resided.
|{{blog|123|2015|01|01|7d late}}
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| rowspan="2" |[[File:Lunar Swimming.png|100px]]
| rowspan="2" |'''{{What If|124|Lunar Swimming}}'''
| rowspan="2" |''"What if there was a lake on the Moon? What would it be like to swim in it? Presuming that it is sheltered in a regular atmosphere, in some giant dome or something."''
<div align="right">—Kim Holder</div>
| rowspan="2" |It would be super-cool, given that lower gravity would increase the size of splashes and the height of jumps.
| rowspan="2" {{blog|124|2015|01|08}}
| rowspan="2" |
|{{book|20|2024|12|24|aIIBBj6KR-Y|What if we put a pool on the moon?}}
|-
|{{book|7|short-video=yes|2025|08|12|mtTbwHzhUiM|Petition to send a swimming pool to the moon!}}
|-
|[[File:Bowling Ball 2.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|125|Bowling Ball}}'''
|''"You are in a boat directly over the Mariana Trench. If you drop a 7kg bowling ball over the side, how long would it take to hit the bottom?"''
<div align="right">—Doug Carter</div>
|It would take two hours and 20 minutes.
|{{blog|125|2015|01|15}}
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|[[File:Stairs (What If?).png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|126|Stairs}}'''
|''"If you made an elevator that would go to space (like the one you mentioned in the '''{{what if|94|billion-story building}}''') and built a staircase up (assuming regulated air pressure) about how long would it take to climb to the top?"''
<div align="right">—Ethan Annas</div>
|It would take about half a day by motorcycle, or a week or two for a professional stair-climber. If going on foot, you'd also need to carry a huge backpack stuffed with nothing but sticks of butter in order to get your daily caloric intake (including the energy expended from climbing the stairs).
|{{blog|126|2015|01|22}}
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|[[File:Tug of War.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|127|Tug of War}}'''
|''"Would it be possible for two teams in a tug-o-war to overcome the ultimate tensile strength of an iron rod and pull it apart? How big would the teams have to be?"''
<div align="right">—Markus Andersen</div>
|Two teams of 25 people each would be able to rip a half-inch iron bar apart: tug-o-war is a very dangerous game, as there's so much force being exerted on the rope. The theoretical upper limit of a game is 100,000 players each, pulling a 200-mile–long rope made of graphite ribbons.
|{{blog|127|2015|01|28|1d early}}
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|[[File:Zippo Phone.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|128|Zippo Phone}}'''
|''"What in my pocket actually contains more energy, my Zippo or my smartphone? What would be the best way of getting the energy from one to the other? And since I am already feeling like Bilbo in this one, is there anything else in my pocket that would have unexpected amounts of stored energy?"''
<div align="right">—Ian Cummings</div>
|The Zippo has more energy than your phone battery, but your hand would have even more, when burned as fuel.
|{{blog|128|2015|02|05|1d late}}
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|[[File:Black Hole Moon.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|129|Black Hole Moon}}'''
|''"What would happen if the Moon were replaced with an equivalently-massed black hole? If it's possible, what would a lunar ("holar"?) eclipse look like?"''
<div align="right">—Matt</div>
|Not much would change. A black hole of the Moon's mass would be the size of a sand grain, but gravitational effects would still be more or less the same here on Earth. There would be no moonlight, which would make the Earth a bit colder and mess with some nocturnal animals. You wouldn't see any lunar eclipses due to the tiny size of the Moon. It would only cause significant problems if humans were on the moon at the time.
|{{blog|129|2015|02|12}}
|
|{{book|28|2025|07|08|UQgw50GQu1A|What if the moon turned into a black hole?}}
|-
|[[File:Snow Removal.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|130|Snow Removal}}'''
|''"I've long thought about putting a flamethrower on the front of a car to melt snow and ice before you drive across it. Now I've realized that a flamethrower is impractical, but what about a high-powered microwave emitter?"''
<div align="right">—Matt Van Opens</div>
|The flamethrower is more practical because microwaves don't heat ice very well. The microwave beam would require the power output of three aircraft carriers, and the flamethrower would have a gas mileage of 17 feet per gallon. If you were to drive on the highway for an hour using this method, it would burn 18,635 gallons of gasoline, worth $40,000 to $50,000.
|{{blog|130|2015|02|19}}
|
|{{book|26|2025|05|27|WYf9-xfm6t8|What if you used a flamethrower as a snowblower?}}
|-
|[[File:Microwaves.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|131|Microwaves}}'''
|''"I have had a particular problem for as long as I can remember. Any time I attempt to heat left over Chinese food in a microwave, it fails to heat completely through somewhere. Usually the center but not always and usually rice, but often it will be a small section of meat. It's baffling and has made me automatically adjust heating times to over 2 minutes. In most cases this tends to heat the bowl or plate more than the food. So I suppose the question is what is the optimal time to heat left over Chinese food in the microwave, how about an 800 watt microwave?"''
<div align="right">—James</div>
|The first cause of this issue is that the wave pattern of microwaves create 'dead spots' where the food isn't heated. Secondly, melted ice causes some parts to cook while the rest is still defrosting. Use a lower power level, stir your food partway through microwaving, and let it sit for a few minutes before you eat it. This allows the heat to spread evenly.
|{{blog|131|2015|02|27|1d late}}
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|[[File:Hotter than Average.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|132|Hotter than Average}}'''
|''"I saw a sign at a hot springs tub saying "Caution: Water is hotter than average" with water at about 39°C. Although they were presumably trying to say "hotter than the average swimming pool," this got me wondering: What is the average temperature of all water on the Earth’s surface, and how does that temperature compare to 39°C?"''
<div align="right">—Graham Ward</div>
|The water average is the year-round average air temperature. By saying the water is "hotter than average", they're implying the water in the pool is not tied to it. Give the signmakers some credit.
|{{blog|132|2015|03|07|1d late}}
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|[[File:Flagpole.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|133|Flagpole}}'''
|''"So, you're falling from a height above the tallest building in your town, and you don't have a parachute. But wait! Partway down the side of that skyscraper there's a flagpole sticking out, sans flag! You angle your descent and grab the pole just long enough to swing around so that when you let go you're now heading back up toward the sky. As gravity slows you and brings you to a halt, you reach the top of the skyscraper, where you reach out and pull yourself to safety. What's the likelihood this could happen?"''
<div align="right">—Rex Ungericht</div>
|It would be impossible, even a gymnast's arms would be ripped off from the force.
|{{blog|133|2015|03|17|3d late}}
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|[[File:Space Burial.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|134|Space Burial}}'''
|''"I've often joked I'd like to have my remains put into orbit. Not in a "scatter my ashes" sense, but, like, "throw my naked corpse out the airlock" sense. Honestly, my main motivation is to baffle someone in the distant future, but it's an interesting scientific question: what would happen to my body in orbit over the course of years, decades or centuries?"''
<div align="right">—Tim in Fremont</div>
|Even before you were launched, your body would dry out very quickly. In low orbit, your body would fall to Earth and be burned from atmospheric re-entry. In a higher orbit, it would be destroyed from space debris. In high orbit, you could last for a few centuries. If your body was ever found it would mean there are a lot of people travelling around: making bodies pretty common.
|{{blog|134|2015|03|28|4d late}}
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|[[File:Digging Downward.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|135|Digging Downward}}'''
|''"What would happen if I dug straight down, at a speed of 1 foot per second? What would kill me first?"''
<div align="right">—Jack Kaunis</div>
|To remove all that soil, the energy required would heat up the surrounding beyond fatal levels pretty quickly. Immune to the heat, you could survive for one to two hours, as oxygen becomes toxic at depths higher than 5 kilometers.
|{{blog|135|2015|04|05|1d late}}
|
|{{book|38|2026|4|11|https://r7B0MzvwDcA|What if you kept digging downward?}}
|-
|[[File:Spiders vs. the Sun.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|136|Spiders vs. the Sun}}'''
|''"Which has a greater gravitational pull on me: the Sun, or spiders? Granted, the Sun is much bigger, but it is also much further away, and as I learned in high school physics, the gravitational force is proportional to the square of the distance."''
<div align="right">—Marina Fleming</div>
|The Sun, by 13 orders of magnitude (the Sun is very big). But spiders are a lot more scary.
|{{blog|136|2015|04|12}}
|{{book|2|44}}
|
|-
|[[File:New Horizons.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|137|New Horizons}}'''
|''"What if New Horizons hits my car?"''
<div align="right">—Robin Sheat</div>
| ''Note: This question was created before ''New Horizons'' passed by Pluto.'' This is extremely unlikely. The ''New Horizons'' probe is quite large, but is considered small for a spacecraft. If it crashed into your car, there would be serious consequences. However, if it did, NASA would be on the hook to replace your car, along with most of your neighbourhood, and clean up the radioactive mess.
|{{blog|137|2015|07|14|2m 25d late}}
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|[[File:Jupiter Submarine.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|138|Jupiter Submarine}}'''
|''"What if you released a submarine into Jupiter's atmosphere? Would it eventually reach a point where it would float? Could it navigate?"''
<div align="right">—KTH</div>
|No. Before it got to the point where it could float, the submarine would be crushed by the high pressure and melted by the high temperature. This is because gasses behave differently to fluids: the point where things can float is at a much higher pressure.
|{{blog|138|2015|07|28|7d late}}
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|[[File:Jupiter Descending.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|139|Jupiter Descending}}'''
|''"If you did '''{{what if|138|fall into Jupiter's atmosphere in a submarine}}''', what would it actually look like? What would you see before you melted or burned up?"''
<div align="right">—Ada Munroe</div>
|There's not a whole lot to go on here; we have some data and educated guesses about what's going inside these gas giants, but we haven't sent any probes equipped with operational cameras into a gas giant so we don't really know. A book by Michael Carroll suggests that there is a layer between the upper ammonia haze and lower ammonium hydrosulfide clouds, that could provide some good views, and if so, the view would be similar to Earth's atmosphere in that clouds and fellow submarines would fade into blue.
|{{blog|139|2015|08|04}}
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|-
|[[File:Proton Earth, Electron Moon.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|140|Proton Earth, Electron Moon}}'''
|''"What if the Earth were made entirely of protons, and the Moon were made entirely of electrons?"''
<div align="right">—Noah Williams</div>
|There would be so much energy packed into one space that it would create a black hole as massive as the observable universe that would expand outwards at the speed of light. Because of the charge from the electrons, it would be a {{w|naked singularity}}, a black hole with infinite mass that allows light to escape.
|{{blog|140|2015|09|18|1m 7d late}}
|{{book|2|48}}
|{{book|30|2025|9|9|DiWFXv9N0Vs|What if the Moon were made entirely of electrons?}}
|-
|[[File:Sunbeam.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|141|Sunbeam}}'''
|''"What if all of the sun's output of visible light were bundled up into a laser-like beam that had a diameter of around 1m once it reaches Earth?"''
<div align="right">—Max Schäfer</div>
|According to Randall, parts of the atmosphere would be heated to millions of degrees, and the bubble of destruction would wrap around the Earth before it even reached the other side. The light reflected off the Moon would be hot enough to burn you to death. If the beam couldn't track the Earth, part of it would survive as the Earth orbited out of the way. If the beam reached another planetary system, it could heat up the surface of some distant exoplanets. However, this conclusion depends on the precise nature of the "bundling up". If this "bundling" is accomplished via passive optics such as lenses and mirrors, then the temperature (and geometry) of the incoming beam will be restricted according to all the optics principles described in "Fire from Moonlight", and under no circumstances would any part of Earth's atmosphere or surface exceed 5000 K, due to the laws of thermodynamics. If, however, the "bundling" consists of an "active" procedure of generating electricity via PV panels, and then powering actual laser emitters with it (not just "laser-like") - which doesn't sound like Max's conception - then yes, the narrow beam of essentially "infinite" temperature and consequent destruction that Randall describes could indeed occur.
|{{blog|141|2016|01|12|3m 18d late}}
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|{{book|33|2025|11|11|qu8nx1qUwEU|What if ALL the sun’s power was focused in one place?}}
|-
|[[File:Space Jetta.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|142|Space Jetta}}'''
|''"What if I tried to re-enter the atmosphere in my car? (a 2000 VW Jetta TDI). Would it do more environmental damage than it is already apparently doing?"''
<div align="right">—Casey Berg</div>
|The effect of the car's re-entry itself on the environment is going to be small, verging on negligible. The effect of ceasing its usage to burn hydrocarbon fuel for the remainder of the car's life is likely significantly greater than the re-entry, but in practice also negligible. The main non-negligible environmental effect might be from the launch mechanism that was used to get into orbit in the first place, although even this effect, at current rocket launch rates, is still tiny compared to global air travel or ground-based automobile usage.
|{{blog|142|2016|01|20|1d late}}
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|[[File:Europa Water Siphon.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|143|Europa Water Siphon}}'''
|''"What if you built a siphon from the oceans on Europa to Earth? Would it flow once it's set up? (We have an idea for selling bottled Europa water.)"''
<div align="right">—A group of Google Search SREs</div>
|No, at least not with a siphon. Siphons can only pull water upward to a height where the air pressure feeding water into one side of the siphon equals the weight of the water falling out the other side (creating negative pressure, trying to form a vacuum, which nature abhors). This effect requires a gravitational field and an atmosphere, but cannot be used to pump water above the local atmosphere, and hence out of the local gravity well, under any circumstances - including on Europa.
|{{blog|143|2016|01|26|1d early}}
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|-
|[[File:Saliva Pool.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|144|Saliva Pool}}'''
|''"How long would it take for a single person to fill up an entire swimming pool with their own saliva?"''
<div align="right">—Mary Griffin, 9th grade</div>
|For an Olympic pool, it would take you 8,345 years. In order to finish by the present day, you'd need to start during the invention of agriculture.
|{{blog|144|2016|02|02}}
|{{book|2|53}}
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|-
|[[File:Fire From Moonlight.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|145|Fire From Moonlight}}'''
|''"Can you use a magnifying glass and moonlight to light a fire?"''
<div align="right">—Rogier Spoor</div>
|Unfortunately, it is not possible to summarize Randall's article succinctly, because most of his explanation is completely irrelevant to the question. Randall's answer is effectively "No, and here are a set of correct principles of optics that do not support my claim." The correct answer is "Yes, just like it is possible to start a fire with sunlight reflected off anything else, because the temperature/wavelength/energy of light does not change (substantially) when it is reflected, and the temperature of visible sunlight is around 5000 to 6000 K." (The obvious assumption about the intent behind Rogier's question is that "moonlight" refers to the reflected sunlight, and not the Moon's own surface emission of longwave infrared radiation with a temperature of 300 - 400 K, which we can't see - but this should really be clarified by Rogier.)
|{{blog|145|2016|02|09}}
|{{book|2|51}}
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|-
|[[File:Stop Jupiter.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|146|Stop Jupiter}}'''
|''"I understand that the ''New Horizons'' craft used gravity assist from Jupiter to increase its speed on the way to Pluto. I also understand that by doing this, Jupiter slowed down very slightly. How many flyby runs would it take to stop Jupiter completely?"''
<div align="right">—Dillon</div>
|Even if we were to throw Earth at Jupiter, this could never happen, because Jupiter is much more massive than Earth. Gravity assists are like bouncing a tennis ball off a train, and to stop the train, you'd need an awfully large tennis ball. 
|{{blog|146|2016|02|16}}
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|[[File:Niagara Straw.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|147|Niagara Straw}}'''
|''"What would happen if one tried to funnel Niagara Falls through a straw?"''
<div align="right">—David Gwizdala</div>
|In order to funnel Niagara Falls through a straw, you'd need to accelerate the water to one-quarter light speed, and no machine exists that's capable of doing that. If you tried, at 1300 m/s, the water would reach the maximum speed it can be accelerated to by pressure, and the flow would become choked if the momentum of the water hasn't already broken the acceleration device by that point. You would also get in a lot of trouble with the authorities for messing with the flow rate of Niagara Falls, since that's forbidden by a US/Canada treaty. If you somehow could actually do it, the resulting waterjet would have the power output of a small star, and would boil away the oceans and wipe out all life on Earth.
|{{blog|147|2016|02|26}} 3d late)
|{{book|2|55}}
|{{book|27|2025|06|17|pfbzrrcQZjs|What if you funneled Niagara Falls through a straw?}}
|-
|[[File:Eat the Sun.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|148|Eat the Sun}}'''
|''"What percentage of the Sun's heat (per day) does the population of Earth eat in calories per year? What changes could be made to our diets for the amount of calories to equal the energy of the Sun?"''
<div align="right">—James Mitchell</div>
|0.000000000065%. This is such a ridiculously small portion of the Sun's heat exhaust, that we cannot increase our personal calory intake enough to compensate. Instead we need to add more persons. A lot of them in fact. So many that we need to spread them - and the food that they eat - out throughout not just our galaxy but multiple galaxies. Otherwise, the food alone would be massive enough to turn into a black hole.
|{{blog|148|2016|03|12|8d late}}
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|[[File:Pizza Bird.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|149|Pizza Bird}}'''
|''"My boyfriend recently took a flight on a plane with wifi, and while he was up there, wistfully asked if I could send him a pizza. I jokingly sent him a photo of a parrot holding a pizza slice in its beak. Obviously, my boyfriend had to go without pizza until he landed at JFK. But this raised the question: could a bird deliver a standard 20" New York-style cheese pizza in a box? And if so, what kind of bird would it take?"''
<div align="right">—Tina Nguyen</div>
|After careful analysis of wing types, relative weights, and pizza grabbing mechanisms, it is deduced that even the most compatible bird - the eagle - would be hard-pressed to deliver a pizza to an airliner, the relative speed being the largest hurdle. However, delivery to a house - where the relative speed is not so much of a problem - would be possible, though the pizza might be found a slice or two short.
|{{blog|149|2016|03|26|7d late}}
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|[[File:Tatooine Rainbow.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|150|Tatooine Rainbow}}'''
|''"Since rainbows are caused by the refraction of the sunlight by tiny droplets of rainwater, what would rainbow look like on Earth if we had two suns like Tatooine?"''
<div align="right">—Raga</div>
|Each sun is the source of not just one rainbow, but a whole series of rainbows of diminishing intensity; the elusive 5th order rainbow had apparently been pictured at the time of publication. A planet with two suns would consequently have two series of rainbows. A solar system arranged like Tatooine would have to be circumbinary, which limits the separation of the two rainbow series to about 20 degrees. As the main rainbow is 84 degrees across, this leads to the conclusion that the rainbows would always be overlapping.
|{{blog|150|2016|05|23|1m 21d late}}
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|[[File:Sun Bug.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|151|Sun Bug}}'''
|''"How many fireflies would it take to match the brightness of the Sun?"''
<div align="right">—Luke Doty</div>
|30 nonillion fireflies (3 with 31 zeroes after it), which is surprisingly small on the astronomical scale. Counterintuitively, it turns out a single firefly actually glows brighter than an equivalent mass of Sun. However, there are logistical problems with organizing that many fireflies, as you need to arrange them so that they're not blocking each others' lights. You can try to simplify it by just using one very large firefly, but it would be larger than the entire Solar System and immediately collapse into the biggest black hole in the universe.
|{{blog|151|2016|07|21|1m 23d late}}
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|[[File:Flood Death Valley.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|152|Flood Death Valley}}'''
|''"Since Death Valley is below sea level could we dig a hole to the ocean and fill it up with water?"''
<div align="right">—Nick Traeden</div>
|Basically, yes. But there is a lot of digging, and the end result would be quite similar to the Salton Sea which is characterized as "gross" (technical term). Also, heat world records would likely move elsewhere.
|{{blog|152|2016|10|18|2m 21d late}}
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|''The thumbnail for this blog article wasn't archived.''
|'''<span class="plainlinks">[https://web.archive.org/web/20161205191559/http://what-if.xkcd.com/153 Peptides]</span>'''
|''"What is the longest English word you can spell using the one letter abbreviations of the 20 genetic amino acids? What about the three letter abbreviations? What would the resultant peptides look like?"''
<div align="right">—Kira (Lysine-Isoleucine-Arginine-Alanine) Guth</div>
|For any peptides, 19 letters is the highest possible, that being the word "interdepartmentally". For naturally existing peptides in the human body, 8 letters is the highest known. Examples of 8 letters are: GRISETTE, DATELESS, REVERSAL.
|{{blog|153|2016|12|05|notAvailable=Draft published by mistake and deleted. [[what if? (blog)#Peptides incident|Learn why]].}}
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|[[File:Hide the Atmosphere.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|153|Hide the Atmosphere}}'''
|''"Earth’s atmosphere is really thin compared to the radius of the Earth. How big a hole do I need to dig before people suffocate?"''
<div align="right">—Sam Burke</div>
|The hole would need to be very big. Under the right circumstances, a five-mile hole over the entire state of Texas might suffice.
|{{blog|153|2017|01|30|3m 5d late}}
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|[[File:Coast-to-Coast Coasting.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|154|Coast-to-Coast Coasting}}'''
|''"What if the entire continental US was on a decreasing slope from West to East. How steep would the slope have to be to sustain the momentum needed to ride a bicycle the entire distance without pedaling?"''
<div align="right">—Brandon Rooks</div>
|The ramp would need to be five miles high (eight kilometres) to make this possible, and that would be at a speed slower than walking. You would also need oxygen for the first third of the way down.
|{{blog|154|2017|02|08|9d late}}
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|[[File:Toaster vs. Freezer.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|155|Toaster vs. Freezer}}'''
|''"Would a toaster still work in a freezer?"''
<div align="right">—<span class="plainlinks">[https://maximumfun.org/podcasts/my-brother-my-brother-and-me/ '''My Brother, My Brother, and Me'''], [https://maximumfun.org/episodes/my-brother-my-brother-and-me/mbmbam-343-sauce-doctors-blessing/ '''Episode 343'''], discussing a </span>Yahoo Answers question</div>
|As a superior being, the Toaster casts its gaze upon lowly humans and hrumphs at their bickering about such measly temperature variations as 40C. The Toaster regularly reaches 600C and thus, to it - much like to the Fire - everything else is cold, be it room temperature or freezer temperature. Winnipeg locals have it easy and can try this for themselves, as long as they can stave off the wolves.
|{{blog|155|2017|02|28|13d late}}
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|[[File:Electrofishing for Whales.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|156|Electrofishing for Whales}}'''
|''"I used to work on a fisheries crew where we would use an electro-fisher backpack to momentarily stun small fish (30 - 100 mm length) so we could scoop them up with nets to identify and measure them. The larger fish tended to be stunned for slightly longer because of their larger surface area but I don't imagine this relationship would be maintained for very large animals. Could you electrofish for a blue whale? At what voltage would you have have to set the e-fisher?"''
<div align="right">—Madeline Cooper</div>
|Electrofishing has long-term effects on fish and especially dolphins. Larger animals, especially mammals, are likely to die rather than just get stunned. But it is also harder to get any effect in saltwater, which explains why electrofishing is mainly done in rivers and lakes, compared to fresh water. This means it wouldn't work on blue whales.
|{{blog|156|2017|03|09|2d late}}
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|[[File:Earth-Moon Fire Pole.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|157|Earth-Moon Fire Pole}}'''
|''"My son (5y) asked me today: If there were a kind of a fireman's pole from the Moon down to the Earth, how long would it take to slide all the way from the Moon to the Earth?"''
<div align="right">—Ramon Schönborn, Germany</div>
|This set-up would face many challenges, but these would be the different domains of the slowest extreme sport: climbing out of the Moon's gravity, accelerating through the middle transfer phase, and then decelerating to your supersonic arrival on Earth.
|{{blog|157|2018|03|21|1y 2m 5d late}}
|{{book|2|58}}
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|[[File:Hot Banana.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|158|Hot Banana}}'''
|''"I heard that bananas are radioactive. If they are radioactive, then they radiate energy. How many bananas would you need to power a house?"''
<div align="right">—Kang Ji</div>
|Bananas are not very radioactive, so it would take an absurdly large number, 300 quadrillion, which is enough to bury New York City in a skyscraper-tall pile of bananas. It would be much more energy efficient to simply burn the bananas as fuel, so that you could power a house with 10 bunches a day (or New York City with a pile the size of Liberty Island a week). The fact that you can do that would also make the huge pile of bananas needed to generate power with radioactivity a huge fire (and explosion) hazard, so just burning the bananas is safer as well.
|{{blog|158|2022|05|04|3y 11m 7d late}}
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|[[File:Hailstones.png|100px]]
|'''{{What If|159|Hailstones}}'''
|''"My 4 year old son and I were wondering about soccer ball sized hail today. How much damage would a hail storm with size 5 soccer ball sized hail do?"''
<div align="right">—Michael Grill</div>
|Hailstones get increasingly dangerous as they get larger, as their increased weight cancels their air resistance, allowing them to reach a higher terminal velocity while still carrying all that mass. Regular hailstones are too slow and light to be lethal, but a soccer ball-sized hailstone would hit at around 140 mph, capable of punching straight through the roof of a car or building. Fortunately, no hailstone on record has ever been that big, although storms can on occasion produce hailstones large enough to damage cars, and in rare cases even kill people.
|{{blog|159|2022|07|05|1m 30d late}}
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|''This blog article doesn't have a thumbnail.''
|'''{{What If|160|Transatlantic Car Rental}}'''
|''"My daughter recently received her driver's permit in the US, and aspires to visit mainland Europe someday. She has learned enough about the rules of the road to know never to drive into the ocean; however, she jokingly suggested that given a sufficient quantity of rental cars, she could eventually get to Europe by driving east repeatedly. The question is, how many vehicles would it take to build a car-bridge across the Atlantic?"''
<div align="right">—Eric Munson</div>
|You'd need approximately a billion plus a trillion cars to pull this off. Also, in addition to destroying global ocean circulation and creating an illegal naval blockade, this is definitely a violation of her rental car agreement. Also, organizing a fleet of that many rental cars would be difficult.
|{{blog|160|2022|09|06|1m 26d late}}
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|''This blog article doesn't have a thumbnail.''
|'''{{What If|161|Star Ownership}}'''
|''"If every country's airspace extended up forever, which country would own the largest percentage of the galaxy at any given time?"''
<div align="right">—Reuven Lazarus</div>
|Given that the South pole (of Earth) points towards the Milky way centre, most of the galaxy will wind up in the air-space (space-space?) of countries of the southern hemisphere. However, due to Earth's rotation around its axis, the nadir of the galaxy core (on Earth) will constantly shift. Given that Australia is the largest of the southern countries, Australia will most often be the Rulers of the Universe. Northern hemisphere jurisdictions, such as New Jersey, will have to contend with some pretty nifty black holes and possibly murderous exoplanets.
|{{blog|161|2022|11|01|1m 19d late}}
|{{book|2|24}}
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|''This blog article doesn't have a thumbnail.''
|'''{{What If|162|Comet Ice}}'''
|''"Could I cool down the Earth by capturing a comet and dropping it in the ocean, like an ice cube in a glass of water?"''
<div align="right">—Daniel Becker</div>
|Only if you had a magical sky-crane that could cancel the comet's initial kinetic energy during capture, then slowly lower it to the ground without converting all of its gravitational potential energy back into more kinetic energy. Converting that potential energy into electricity to substitute for existing fossil fuel power plants would reduce CO2 emissions, but the effect of that substitution on global temperatures is uncertain and likely negligible. Meanwhile, the amount of ice in a comet that could be used to cool the oceans directly is also less than one would expect from its size, since comets are not solid. Overall, the answer is effectively "no".
|{{blog|162|2022|12|06|29d late}}
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| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" |'''Global Windstorm'''
| rowspan="3" |''"What would happen if the Earth and all terrestrial objects suddenly stopped spinning, but the atmosphere retained its velocity?"''
<div align="right">—Andrew Brown</div>
| rowspan="3" |Everyone would die. Then, the wind would destroy everything, with gusts blowing more than 1,000 mph (1,600 km/h) around the equator, killing 85% of the world population. The highest winds would only last a few minutes, but that would be enough to vaporise most human structures. Bunkers would be useless, because, even if your bunker were stuck to the ground hard, others would not be as strong and would hit yours at 1,000 mph. However, most of the researchers at the {{w|Amundsen–Scott South Pole Station}} would be completely fine. The wind blast would then become a heat blast with scorching temperatures and create global thunderstorms in moist areas. After a while, the Earth would gradually start to regain its rotational velocity thanks to the Moon.
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" {{book|1|1}}
|{{book|4|2024|01|09|gp5G1QG6cXc|What if Earth suddenly stopped spinning?}}
|-
|{{book|12|short-video=yes|2025|10|07|19gun1mffWs|What would happen to the population if the Earth suddenly stopped spinning?}}
|-
|{{book|13|short-video=yes|2025|10|14|ERieN5pee7A|What would happen to the Earth if it suddenly stopped spinning?}}
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #1'''
| colspan="2" |''"Would it be possible to get your teeth to such a cold temperature that they would shatter upon drinking a hot cup of coffee?"''
<div align="right">—Shelby Hebert</div>
<div align="right"></div>
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|4}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"How many houses are burned down in the United States every year? What would be the easiest way to increase that number by a significant amount (say, at least 15%)?"''<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|-
|
|'''New York–Style Time Machine'''
|''"I assume when you travel back in time you end up at the same spot on the Earth’s surface. At least, that’s how it worked in the Back to the Future movies. If so, what would it be like if you traveled back in time, starting in Times Square, New York, 1000 years? 10,000 years? 100,000 years? 1,000,000 years? 1,000,000,000 years? What about foward in time 1,000,000 years?"''
<div align="right">—Mark Dettling</div>
|
*1,000 years back, you'd see many chestnut trees, wolves, and passenger pigeons.
*10,000 years back, the ground would be mostly bedrock, with large chunks of ice and dropped boulders, called glacial erratics.
*100,000 years back, several islands were pushed upwards by the ice. You would see many now-extinct species, such as Canis dirus, Smilodon fatalis, and Arctodus.
*1,000,000 years back, you'd see relatives of hyenas called Chasmaporthetes.
*1,000,000,000 years back would be no plants or animals, only single-celled organisms in the ocean.
|
|{{book|1|5}}
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|-
|
|'''Periodic Wall of the Elements'''
|''"What would happen if you made a periodic table out of cube-shaped bricks, where each brick was made of the corresponding element?"''
<div align="right">—Andy Connolly</div>
|The top two rows wouldn't be too dangerous to build if you can deal with the fluorine setting almost everything else on fire without setting yourself on fire or exposing yourself to corrosive reaction products like hydrofluoric acid, but the rest of the periodic table would seriously injure or kill you. In the third row, the phosphorus, sulfur and chlorine would also catch on fire and make toxic gas. In the fourth row, the potassium would add to the ongoing fire, which would ignite the arsenic making highly toxic arsenic trioxide. Bromine and selenium would also contribute to the toxic compounds produced in the fire, while also making it smell horrible. The fifth row would be similar to the fourth while also including technetium, which is moderately radioactive. In the sixth row, elements with short half-lives would destroy the building you were in as well as causing nuclear fallout to fall nearby. Past the sixth row, the entire city you were in would be destroyed in a nuclear explosion, and the fallout would contaminate the Earth with thousands of times more radioactivity than the Chernobyl disaster.
|
|{{book|1|8}}
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|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #2'''
|''"Would dumping anti-matter into the Chernobyl reactor when it was melting down stop the meltdown?"''
<div align="right">—AJ</div>
| No, it would not. According to Randall's answer comic, this idea deserves a "For God's Sake, What Were You Thinking?" Award.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|12}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"Is it possible to cry so much you dehydrate yourself?"''<div align="right">—Karl Wildermuth</div>
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''The Last Human Light'''
| rowspan="2" |''"If every human somehow simply disappeared from the face of the Earth, how long would it be before the last artificial light source would go out?"''
<div align="right">—Alan</div>
| rowspan="2" |Anything that depends on the power grid will go out in a few hours after the fossil fuel plants stop getting supplied with fuel because the sudden reduction in working power plants will cause cascade failures leading to a blackout without human guidance. Lights powered by diesel generators will stay on until the fuel runs out, probably in a matter of months at most. Lights powered by geothermal plants, wind turbines and hydroelectric dams will run until their power source has a mechanical failure, possibly for several years. Battery powered lights will go out in a decade or two at most due to self discharge of the batteries. Lights powered by nuclear reactors will go out fairly quickly because the SCRAM would get triggered by the loss of external power. The Curiosity rover would have lights that could theoretically work for over a century if only someone was there to turn them on. Solar powered emergency call boxes have lights that would stay on until the electronics degrade, possibly as long as a century. Radioactive waste that was mixed with glass to facilitate shielding, transportation and storage will glow for centuries due to Cherenkov radiation.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|13}}
|{{book|11|2024|05|28|8fADp43wJwU|If all humans died, when would the last light go out?}}
|-
|{{book|5|short-video=yes|2025|07|29|kNry0bf7eC0|Could this be the last surviving human light source?}}
|-
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #3'''
| colspan="2" |''"Given humanity’s current knowledge and capabilities, is it possible to build a new star?"''
<div align="right">—Jeff Gordon</div>
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3"{{book|1|16}}
| rowspan="3" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"What sort of logistic anomalies would you encounter in trying to raise an army of apes?"''<div align="right">—Kevin</div>
|-
| colspan="2" |''"If people had wheels and could fly, how would we differentiate them from airplanes?"''<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Orbital Submarine'''
| rowspan="2" |''"How long would a nuclear submarine last in orbit?"''
<div align="right">—Jason Lathbury</div>
| rowspan="2" |Submarines are, unsurprisingly, very good at being watertight. This would mean that, mostly, air would stay within the submarine for a time. However, a nuclear submarine is able to stay under for so long because it can convert seawater into oxygen. With no seawater, no oxygen is made, which means that eventually they will run out of air. Getting back into the atmosphere would be tricky. Firing all of a submarine's missiles backwards (i.e. towards the ship) with their detonators removed would produce just enough force for the sub to deorbit and reenter the atmosphere. At that point, the heat and forces of reentry would rip the submarine apart, similar to the {{w|Space Shuttle Challenger disaster}}.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|17}}
|{{book|7|2024|03|05|EsUBRd1O2dU|Would a Submarine Work as a Spaceship?}}
|-
|{{book|4|short-video=yes|2025|07|22|sFTRRdHqZIQ|Why Space Is Actually Warm!}}
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #4'''
|''"Would it be possible to stop a volcano eruption by placing a bomb (thermobaric or nuclear) underneath the surface?"''
<div align="right">—Tomasz Gruszka</div>
| No, it would not.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|20}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|''"A friend of mine is convinced that there is sound in space. There isn’t, right?"''<div align="right">—Aaron Smith</div>
| You are correct. There isn't.
|-
|
|'''Human Computer'''
|''"How much computing power could we achieve if the entire world population stopped whatever we are doing right now and started doing calculations? How would it compare to a modern-day computer or smartphone?"''
<div align="right">—Mateusz Knorps</div>
|The combined computing power of all devices surpassed the power of all humans in 1977.
|
|{{book|1|21}}
|
|-
|
|'''Common Cold'''
|''"If everyone on the planet stayed away from each other for a couple of weeks, wouldn't the common cold virus be wiped out?"''
<div align="right">—Sarah Ewart</div>
|In theory, this would work. In practice, it wouldn't for a simple reason: Some people have compromised immune systems. These people's bodies can be a safe haven for rhinoviruses, which would mean the common cold, would quickly spread through the population again. The world's food supplies would also be an issue, as people may need to eat foods not designed to be eaten directly (i.e. raw grain). Many systems would shut down as people wouldn't be there to maintain them. Many millions would be stranded in places like Antarctica or the Sahara Desert, which would lead to many deaths. In effect, the scenario would be similar to 'Everybody Jump'.
|
|{{book|1|25}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #5'''
| colspan="2" |''" If global warming puts us in danger through temperature rise, and super-volcanos put us into danger of global cooling, shouldn’t those two dangers balance each other out?"''
<div align="right">—Florian Seidl-Schulz</div>
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|27}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"How fast would a human have to run in order to be cut in half at the bellybutton by a cheese-cutting wire?"''<div align="right">—Jon Merrill</div>
|-
|
|'''No More DNA'''
|''"This may be a bit gruesome, but... if someone's DNA suddenly vanished, how long would that person last?"''
<div align="right">—Nina Charest</div>
| At the instant of vanishing, you would suddenly lose a third of a pound and your muscles might twitch from the change in mass. You would then suffer similar symptoms to those caused by toxins or radiation that severely damage DNA. You would probably have nausea and diarrhea. You would probably develop anemia. Your hair would probably fall out. Your immune system would collapse. You could live for several hours or days before succumbing to infection or system-wide organ failure.
|
|{{book|1|29}}
|{{book|35|2026|01|20|s3oLIDaElaE|How long would you survive with no DNA?}}
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #6'''
| colspan="2" |''"What is the total nutritional value (calories, fat, vitamins, minerals, etc.) of the average human body?"''
<div align="right">—Justin Risner</div>
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|31}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"What temperature would a chainsaw (or other cutting implement) need to be at to instantly cauterize any injuries inflicted with it?"''<div align="right">—Sylvia Gallagher</div>
|-
|
|'''Flyover States'''
|''"Which US state is actually flown over the most?"''
<div align="right">—Jesse Ruderman</div>
|Somewhat surprisingly, Virginia, due to a large amount of flights from Toronto to the Caribbean/South America. Despite it having many major airports, including most of those serving DC, there are also many major airports which have routes passing over Virginia, such as KATL and KJFK. At the time of writing, Delaware had the greatest ratio of flights over it to flights to it because it did not have an active commercial airport (Since New Castle Airport resumed commercial service in 2013, this has probably changed.). Hawai'i is the least flown over state, followed by California. Hawai'i is a group of small islands in the middle of a big ocean, and flights that would otherwise fly over California are encouraged to land there instead by post-9/11 rules that discourage carrying excessive fuel. Strangely, Hawai'i is the most flown under state because the part of Botswana on the opposite side of the Earth from Hawai'i has more flights pass over it than any of the various parts of the Indian Ocean opposite the other states.
|
|{{book|1|33}}
|
|-
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #7'''
| colspan="2" |''"In Thor the main character is at one point spinning his hammer so fast that he creates a strong tornado. Would this be possible in real life?"''
<div align="right">—Davor</div>
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3"{{book|1|36}}
| rowspan="3" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"If you saved a whole life’s worth of kissing and used all that suction power on one single kiss, how much suction force would that single kiss have?"''<div align="right">—Jonatan Lindström</div>
|-
| colspan="2" |''"How many nuclear missiles would have to be launched at the United States to turn it into a complete wasteland?"''<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|-
|
|'''Self-Fertilization'''
|''"I read about some researchers who were trying to produce sperm from bone marrow stem cells. If a woman were to have sperm cells made from her own stem cells and impregnate herself, what would be her relationship to her daughter?"''
<div align="right">—R Scott LaMorte</div>
| As there is no father to contribute a Y chromosome, the child is guaranteed to be a girl. As the child is coming from, effectively, two parents with identical DNA, there would be many genetic defects, similar to being as inbred as the result of three generations of consecutive sibling marriages. This is, as demonstrated by various royal families, a very bad idea. It would be relatively likely for any given human self-fertilization to have a non-viable result.
|
|{{book|1|37}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #8'''
|''"A toxin blocks the ability of the nephron tubule reabsorption but does not affect filtration. What are the possible short-term effects of this toxin?"''
<div align="right">—Mary</div>
| Randall's answer comic indicates that since he's a cartoonist not a doctor, he is unqualified to answer this question.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|40}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"If a Venus fly trap could eat a person, about how long would it take for the human to be fully de-juiced and absorbed?"''<div align="right">—Jonathan Wang</div>
|-
|
|'''Lost Immortals'''
|''"If two immortal people were placed on opposite sides of an uninhabited Earthlike planet, how long would it take them to find each other? 100,000 years? 1,000,000 years? 100,000,000,000 years?"''
<div align="right">—Ethan Lake</div>
|Depending on strategy and terrain, a few years to a few decades. Based on the communication methods of ants, Randall suggests that the immortals leave trails of markers of when they were there and which way they went as they travel and if they find the other immortal's markers follow them as fast as possible.
|
|{{book|1|42}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #9'''
|''"Could you survive a tidal wave by submerging yourself in an in-ground pool?"''
<div align="right">—Chris Muska</div>
| No, that would be a very bad idea.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|46}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|''"If you are in free fall and your parachute fails, but you have a Slinky with extremely convenient mass, tension, etc., would it be''
possible to save yourself by throwing the Slinky upward while holding on to one end of it?"<div align="right">—Varadarajan Srinivasan</div>
| No, it would not.
|-
|
|'''Sparta'''
|''"In the movie 300 they shoot arrows up into the sky and they seemingly blot out the sun. Is this possible, and how many arrows would it take?"''
<div align="right">—Anna Newell</div>
|300 arrows per second with densely packed archers could blot out 99% of the Sun's light. If the Sun were low in the horizon, you could more effectively block sunlight with less arrows if the arrows were aimed to pass between the battlefield and the Sun. However, this would have little to no effect on the opponent, unless it required solar panels.
|
|{{book|1|47}}
|
|-
|
|'''Lego Bridge'''
|''"How many Lego bricks would it take to build a bridge capable of carrying traffic from London to New York? Have that many Lego bricks been manufactured?"''
<div align="right">—Jerry Petersen</div>
|Enough bricks have been manufactured to connect London and New York, but the bridge would not be structurally sound enough to stay together for very long.
|
|{{book|1|51}}
|
|-
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #10'''
| colspan="2" |''"What is the probability that if I am stabbed by a knife in my torso that it won’t hit anything vital and I’ll live?"''
<div align="right">—Thomas</div>
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3"{{book|1|54}}
| rowspan="3" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"If I were on a motorbike and do a jump off a quarter pipe ramp, how fast would I need to be moving to safely deploy and land using the parachute?"''<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|-
| colspan="2" |''"What if every day, every human had a 1 percent chance of being turned into a turkey, and every turkey had a 1 percent chance of
being turned into a human?"''<div align="right">—Kenneth</div>
|-
|
|'''Weightless Arrow'''
|''"Assuming a zero-gravity environment with an atmosphere identical to Earth's, how long would it take the friction of air to stop an arrow fired from a bow? Would it eventually come to a standstill and hover in midair?"''
<div align="right">—Mark Estano</div>
|The arrow would stop at about 5 to 10 kilometers and float if the space it was being loosed in were large enough to allow that. Since the only sustained zero-gravity environment with an Earth-like atmosphere in real life is on the International Space Station, where Kibo the longest module is 10 m long, realistically the arrow would hit something and potentially cause serious damage.
|
|{{book|1|56}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''All the Lightning'''
| rowspan="2" |''"If all the lightning strikes happening in the world on any given day all happened in the same place at once, what would happen to that place?"''
<div align="right">—Trevor Jones</div>
| rowspan="2" |A typical lightning strike delivers enough energy to power a residential house for about 2 days. Hence, even in lightning-prone regions the power delivered to the ground by the sun outweighs the power delivered to the ground by lightning by a factor of a million. Assuming that the lightning bolts come down in parallel, our bundle (containing about a million bolts) would be around 6 meters in diameter. It would deliver about two atomic bombs worth of energy to the air and ground, leaving a crater the size of a basketball court. Inside the channel, the air would turn into high energy plasma. The light and heat from the bolt would spontaneously ignite surfaces for miles around while the shockwave would flatten trees and demolish buildings. A copper cable a meter in diameter could in theory conduct the brief surge of current from the bolt without melting, however anything on the other end of the cable wouldn't be able to conduct it properly.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" {{book|1|62}}
|{{book|10|2024|05|07|fs28lEq9smw|What if all the lightning on Earth struck the same place at once?}}
|-
|{{book|3|short-video=yes|2025|07|15|_efsqO-4OoQ|Could We Harvest Power From Lightning?}}
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #11'''
|''"What if everyone in Great Britain went to one of the coasts and started paddling? Could they move the island at all?"''
<div align="right">—Ellen Eubanks</div>
| No, they could not.
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|64}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
|''"Are fire tornadoes possible?"''<div align="right">—Seth Wishman</div>
| Yes, [[Wikipedia:Fire_whirl|fire tornadoes]] are a real phenomenon which Randall finds very impressive.
|-
|
|'''Neutron Bullet'''
|''"If a bullet with the density of a neutron star were fired from a handgun (ignoring the how) at the Earth's surface, would the Earth be destroyed?"''
<div align="right">—Charlotte Ainsworth</div>
|No. The bullet would fall through the ground and stop in the center of the Earth. If the bullet were actually made of neutron star material, it would violently explode back into normal matter when removed from the neutron star gravity well with more energy than any nuclear weapon, but since the question does not specify this, Randall chose to imagine a stable material of the same density. If the bullet could be kept at the surface of the Earth, it would be relatively safe to stand several meters away from, but if you came too close, the gravity would pull you in and when you touched it drain all your blood. If the bullet were covered in water of just the right density, you could possibly safely touch it and then pull away, but it would still be risky to attempt.
|
|{{book|1|67}}
|
|-
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2" |'''Weird (and Worrying) Questions from the What If? Inbox, #12'''
| colspan="2" |''"What if I swallow a tick that has Lyme disease? Will my stomach acid kill the tick and the borreliosis, or would I get Lyme disease from the inside out?"''
<div align="right">—Christopher Vogel</div>
| rowspan="2" |
| rowspan="2"{{book|1|68}}
| rowspan="2" |
|-
| colspan="2" |''"Assuming a relatively uniform resonant frequency in a passenger jet, how many cats, meowing at what resonant frequency of said jet, would be required to "bring it down"?"<div align="right">—Brittany</div>
|-
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" |'''Richter 15'''
| rowspan="3" |''"What if a Richter magnitude 15 earthquake were to hit America at, let's say, New York City? What about a Richter 20? 25?"''
<div align="right">—Alec Farid</div>
| rowspan="3" |A magnitude 15 earthquake would destroy the Earth, but going higher won't make much difference. You can actually go lower than 0, though.
| rowspan="3" |
| rowspan="3" {{book|1|69}}
|{{book|2|2023|12|05|e3uk7jU3RHo|What would a magnitude 15 earthquake be like?}}
|-
|{{book|1|short-video=yes|2025|06|24|wBLVmEZV2Oc|How high could the magnitude of Earthquakes go?}}
|-
|{{book|2|short-video=yes|2025|07|01|FKXVs4UteSc|Is there such a thing as a magnitude 0 earthquake?}}
|-
|
|'''Soupiter'''
|''"What would happen if the Solar System was filled with soup out to Jupiter?"''
<div align="right">—Amelia</div>
|The soup would collapse into a very large black hole and devour the Milky Way, though we would feel mostly fine for the first 10 to 15 minutes.
|
|{{book|2|1}}
|
|-
|
|'''Helicopter Ride'''
|''"What if you were hanging on a helicopter blade by your hands and then someone turned it on?"''
<div align="right">—Corban Blanset</div>
|Without any grip assistance, you'd fall off before it completed its first revolution. With handholds, your body would instead fall off of your arms. Assuming no issues with staying on the wing, there would be more problems to follow. The helicopter, as it spooled up, would begin violently wobbling due to the constantly changing center of gravity before flipping itself, destroying both you and the pilot in a massive fireball.
|
|{{book|2|2}}
|
|-
|
|'''Dangerously Cold'''
|''"Would there be any danger from standing next to a large object that was 0 Kelvin?"''
<div align="right">—Christopher</div>
|There wouldn't be a lot of direct danger from the cube itself, though it would make you feel cold. The bigger danger would be from liquid oxygen condensing and igniting flammable objects. It would take a while to reheat the cube
|
|{{book|2|3}}
|
|-
|
|'''Ironic Vaporization'''
|''"What if we somehow evaporated a solid block of iron on {{asic|ear|th''}}''?"''
<div align="right">—Cooper C.</div>
|The cube would ignite whatever is near it and deposit large quantities of iron flakes downwind. However, it wouldn't make a huge impact on the total amount of atmospheric iron.
|
|{{book|2|4}}
|
|-
|
|'''Cosmic Road Trip'''
|''"If the universe stopped expanding right now, how long would it take for a human to drive a car all the way to the edge of the universe?"''
<div align="right">—Sam H-H</div>
|First off, a human can't do this. Assuming a normal crash rate, an average human driver wouldn't make it past Mars without crashing. Even truck drivers, a field where the crash rate is much lower, wouldn't make it past Jupiter. Using a self-driving car, however, would negate this. It would take an incredibly long time, on the order of approximately 480 quadrillion years if you're driving at a steady pace of 65 miles per hour. Assuming you want to keep your car functional, you would go through 30 quintillion oil changes. Assuming a reasonable 33 MPG highway mileage, the amount of gasoline needed would be similar to the Moon in size. You would also need 10^17 tons of snacks. Entertainment would be another issue. If every person who has ever lived had 150 friends/acquaintances, listening to a real-time podcast of someone's life, all from the perspective of a different friend/acquaintance, you would need to re-watch them all 150 times to make it to the edge of the observable universe. Once you get there, there would be no Earth to come back to.
|
|{{book|2|5}}
|
|-
|
|'''Pigeon Chair'''
|''"How many pigeons would it require in order to lift the average person and launch a chair to the height of Australia's Q1 skyscraper?"''
<div align="right">—Nick Evans</div>
|The optimal method for using the least amount of pigeons would be to use a multi-stage system of sorts. A group of pigeons would lift you about 10 feet, before dropping you as another group swoops in to take their place. However, even with this system, the number of pigeons would be large enough that the Earth would be pulled into the pigeons by gravity instead of the other way around. In other words, if you want to get to the top of Australia's Q1 skyscraper, use an elevator.
|
|{{book|2|6}}
|
|-
|rowspan="11"|
|rowspan="11"|'''Short Answers #1'''
|''"What if your blood became liquid uranium? Would you die from radiation, lack of oxygen, or something else?"''
<div align="right">—Thomas Chattaway</div>
|You would die Having-no-Blood-and-Being-Full-of-Molten-Uranium Syndrome. Also known as Jeff's Disease.
|rowspan="11"|
|rowspan="11"{{book|2|6.5}} (S1)
|rowspan="11"|
|-
|''"Could someone have an anime-style attack where they created a sword out of air? I'm not talking about an air blade, but something like cooling the air enough so that you had solid air to attack people."''
<div align="right">—Emma</div>
|Theoretically yes, but it would be extremely impractical. The temperature to turn oxygen solid is very low, and even with proper insulation it would still cause frostbite. It would also be very weak and very soft, and would sublimate quickly, basically making it useless for all intents and purposes, except for PR.
|-
|''"How much water do you have to drink to become 99 percent water?"''
<div align="right">—LyraxH</div>
|About 500 gallons of water.
|-
|''"What would we see if we attached a lightweight camera to a balloon and let it fly away?"''
<div align="right">—Raymond Peng</div>
|We would see a balloon slowly flying away, fading into the sky. It would be quite pretty. Though next time we should probably attach a transmitter.
|-
|''"How many calories does Mario burn a day?"''
<div align="right">—Daniel and Xavier Hovley</div>
|Mario starved to death in late 1985.
|-
|''"If a snake unhinged its jaw and swallowed a balloon whole, could/would the balloon carry the snake up?"''
<div align="right">—Freezachu</div>
|No.
|-
|''"If you were to jump out of an airplane that was traveling at Mach 880980 that was 100,00 feet above ground in New York City, with skydiving gear, could you survive?"''
<div align="right">—Jack Catten</div>
|rowspan="2"|No, you would die.
|-
|''"If there was no water on Earth, would we all live?"''
<div align="right">—Karen</div>
|-
|''"Is it possible to make a homemade jetpack?"''
<div align="right">—Azhari Zadil</div>
|It's very easy to make one that works once; much harder to make it work more.
|-
|''"I was wondering whether there's a way to use my welder as a defibrillator? (The specific model I own is an Impax IM-ARC140 arc welder.)"''
<div align="right">—Łukasz Grabowski</div>
|No, and you probably shouldn't be allowed to use it as an arc welder either.
|-
|''"What if all atoms on Earth were expanded to the size of a grape? Would we survive?
|I don't know how to answer this with science, but now I want grapes.
|-
|
|'''Geyser'''
|''"If one were to stand on top of the Old Faithful geyser in Yellowstone National Park, at what speed would they be launched upwards and what injuries would they likely sustain?"''
<div align="right">—Catherine McGrath</div>
|If you positioned yourself in just the right way, and used an umbrella to catch as much lift as possible, you could be launched hundreds of feet in the air. Unsurprisingly, you'd receive severe burns and almost certainly die. Surprisingly, however, you would be far from the first person to get severe burns from the geysers.
|
|{{book|2|8}}
|
|-
|
|'''Pew, Pew, Pew'''
|''"If you shot a ridiculously powerful gun/{{asic|la|zer''}}'' would it go off the edge of the world in a straight line or curve around the world?"''
<div align="right">—Maelor</div>
|The beam would go off the edge of the world, except under certain circumstances.
|
|{{book|2|9}}
|
|-
|rowspan="4"|
|rowspan="4"|'''Weird & Worrying #1'''
|colspan="2"|''"Can bees or other animals go to hell? Or can they murder other bees without consequences?"''
<div align="right">—Sadie Kim</div>
|rowspan="4"|
|rowspan="4"{{book|2|10.5}} (W1)
|rowspan="4"|
|-
|colspan="2"|''"How many mirrors reflecting (sun)light would it take to kill, or at least, injure somebody?"''
<div align="right">—Eli Collinge</div>
|-
|colspan="2"|''"If you had to remove the tonsils of a giant, what would be the safest way for you to do it? The surgeon is a normal human."''
<div align="right">—Tirzah</div>
|-
|colspan="2"|''"What would it take to defeat Air Force One with a drone???"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|-
|
|'''Banana Church'''
|''"Can all the world's bananas fit inside of all of the world's churches? My friends have had this argument for a little over 10 years now."''
<div align="right">—Jonas</div>
|Yes. They would likely only fill the churches to 6 inches deep. For the bananas to be unable to fit, each person would need to eat a 1 foot by 1 foot by 2 meter crate's worth of bananas per year.
|
|{{book|2|11}}
|
|-
|
|'''Lose Weight the Slow and Incredibly Difficult Way'''
|''"I want to lose 20 pounds. How much of the Earth's mass would I have to "relocate" to space in order to achieve my goal?"''
<div align="right">—Ryan Murphy</div>
|You would have to remove 85% of the Earth's mass. However, due to the increase in density in the mantle, you would actually gain weight until you've removed about half the Earth's diameter. An image of what it would look like is shown in [[2575: What If? 2]], where a potato peeler is used to remove the crust of the Earth.
|
|{{book|2|13}}
|
|-
|
|'''Jupiter Comes to Town'''
|''"Dear Randall, what would happen if you shrunk Jupiter down to the size of a house and placed in a neighborhood, say, replacing a house?"''
<div align="right">—Zachary</div>
|Assuming density stayed the same when you shrunk Jupiter down, the biggest issue would be that the gravity that keeps its hot interior together would no longer exist, essentially creating a giant fireball that would turn into a mushroom cloud, and eventually spread out into a big cool cloud. This would, effectively, be the reverse of the formation of Jupiter, which started as clouds before being compressed into a small hot ball.
|
|{{book|2|15}}
|
|-
|
|'''Swing Set'''
|''"How tall can a swing set be while still being powered by a human pumping their legs? Is it possible to build a swing set tall enough to launch the rider into space if they jump at the right time? (Assuming the human has enough energy, which my 5-year-old seems to have.)"''
<div align="right">—Joe Coyle</div>
|This is impossible due to the fact that, by pumping the legs, you are essentially pushing against the crossbar of the swing set. A string which is too long will result in a very low amount of force being delivered to the crossbar, lowering the maximum angle you can swing relative to the base of the curve. Calculations show that the optimal crossbar height to gain the most angle relative to the ground is approximately 8 feet.
|
|{{book|2|17}}
|
|-
|
|'''Airliner Catapult'''
|''"My friend is a commercial airline pilot. She says that a significant amount of fuel is spent on takeoff. To save fuel, why couldn't we launch airplanes using catapult systems like on aircraft carriers (calibrated to normal human accelerations)? Could significant amounts of fossil fuels be saved if the catapults could be run by some other clean energy? I'm imagining a rope ... one end tied to the airplane, the other tied to a large boulder at the edge of a cliff. Just push the boulder off the cliff!"''
<div align="right">—Brady Barkey</div>
|It's not a completely ridiculous idea, but the most practical issue is that you'd have to extend the roughly mile-long runway several times more to take full advantage of it. Using the proposed rope-and-cliff system, you'd need to use a thousand ton weight dropped at the height of a super tall skyscraper - of course, if you used something heavier, like the 80,000-ton Washington Monument, you wouldn't need to drop it as far.
|
|{{book|2|18}}
|
|-
|rowspan="14"|
|rowspan="14"|'''Short Answers #2'''
|''"Billy the Clown is running out of cash, so in order to raise money, he devises his newest trick: He will inflate, by mouth, a standard-size party balloon until the material (some form of indestructible rubber) is just one atom thick. How large would the inflated party balloon be?"''
<div align="right">—Alan Fong</div>
|It's a total mystery why Billy is running out of cash.
|rowspan="14"|
|rowspan="14"{{book|2|18.5}} (S2)
|rowspan="14"|
|-
|''"How many leaf blowers would it take to move a standard SUV"''
<div align="right">—Ashley H.</div>
|Somewhere around 1-2 dozen leaf blowers would do the trick. However, it would be very impractical, consume a lot of fuel, and the acceleration would be very slow. Many more leaf blowers would be needed to accelerate the car at a reasonable rate.
|-
|''"If you put a vacuum at extremely high suction and aimed it at a normal BMW sedan, what would happen?"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|Nothing. Cars, even small ones like sedans, are far too large and heavy to be affected by a vacuum, even a very large and powerful one.
|-
|''"On a warm summer evening, when you sit outside with a light on, you can be sure that bugs will be attracted to the light. Then why is it that these same bugs don't fly toward the biggest and strongest lamp of them all, namely the Sun, during the day?"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|Those who did would die and not be able to produce offspring with the same traits.
|-
|''"If you collected all of the guns in the world and put them on one side of the Earth, then shot the all simultaneously, would it move the Earth?"''
<div align="right">—Nathan</div>
|It would not move the Earth, but it would make the other side a nicer place to live.
|-
|''"What would happen if you microwaved a small microwave, while the smaller one was on as well?"''
<div align="right">—Micheal</div>
|Randall gave the meme answer of 'You would no longer be welcome in that IKEA.' In reality, this would almost certainly lead to some dire consequences. Microwaves contain sensitive electronics which would be damaged from excess heat{{cn}}, leaving the microwave functionally useless. Most microwaves are also made of metal, which is known for exploding when exposed to microwaves. This is the same principle that causes forks to explode when placed in one.
|-
|''"If you're jumping on a trampoline, how fast would your body have to be going to:<br>'''A.''' Break all bones on impact<br>'''B.''' Make your body go though the tiny holes of the mesh."''
<div align="right">—Micah Lane</div>
|<ol style="list-style-type: upper-alpha">
<li>Breaking all of the bones in your body would be hard because a lot of them are very small, but it would be fast enough that the trampoline wouldn't make much of a difference.</li>
<li>This can't happen, no matter how fast you're going.</li>
</ol>
|-
|''"I have a Nothing Grenade™. When detonated, it instantly replaces itself with a sphere of perfect vacuum 2 meters across. What would actually happen when it went off?"''
<div align="right">—Dave H.</div>
|As the two-meter vacuum circle appeared, the surrounding air would rapidly fill in the sudden gap. Almost instantaneously, the air would collide and expand out with enough force to possibly kill a human and damage small structures such as bookshelves or walls. In other words, you basically have a regular grenade.
|-
|''"Is space hot or cold?"''
<div align="right">—Isaac</div>
|The answer to this is complicated. Temperature is a measurement of the speed of particles. In space, having no air resistance, particles move incredibly fast. However, because it's a vacuum, there are almost no particles. This is a similar principle to the reason you don't get burned when welding sparks touch your skin. They're so small they do basically nothing to you. As there are almost no particles to impact you, space is the hottest place you can freeze to death.
|-
|''"How many bones can you remove from the human body while allowing the human to continue living? Asking for a friend."''
<div align="right">—Chris Rakeman</div>
|That person is not your friend.
|-
|''"What would happen if you put a human under a g-force of 417 Gs for twenty seconds?"''
<div align="right">—Nythill</div>
|The human is guaranteed to die. Scientific tests have shown that, despite the human body's ability to withstand g-forces into the hundreds for very short periods of time (a car crash may exceed 100 Gs of force), going over 18 Gs for a long period of time is likely to cause the human to black out and quickly die, as the force would prevent blood from being able to flow through a human body properly. This is the same reason why bugs are unable to move after hitting a car on the highway, even if they survive.
|-
|''"Where or how can one commit a murder and not be prosecuted for it?"''
<div align="right">—Kunai Dhawan</div>
|Theoretically, in a section of Yellowstone National Park, where {{w|Zone of Death (Yellowstone)|a jury would have to be formed from a non-existent population}}. In practice, you'd definitely still be prosecuted for committing a murder there.
|-
|''"I read today that insects make at least $57 billion a year for the US economy. If we were to pay every single insect in the United States equally for their economic contribution, how much would each insect get?"''
<div align="right">—Hannah McDonald</div>
|Each insect would get $0.0000029.
Broken down:
*$18 billion to flies, including mosquitoes
*$16 billion to bees, wasps, and ants
*$10 billion to beetles
*$7 billion to thrips
*$1 billion to butterflies and moths
*$1 billion to true bugs
*$4 billion to all other insects
|-
|''"What, in today's world and yesterday's world, does it mean to be human, in all social and biological factors?"''
<div align="right">—Seth Carrol</div>
|You meant to submit this to ''Why If?: Deeply Ungrammatical Answers to Unanswerable Philosophical Questions''.
|-
|
|'''Slow Dinosaur Apocalypse'''
|''"What if an object like the Chicxulub impactor hit earth with a relatively low relative speed of (let's say) 3 mph"''
<div align="right">—Beni von Alemann</div>
|Even though the meteor is slow, it's still very big. The impactor would not create a crater, but would instead create a weird effect which makes the rock flow like water, creating a large "space dirt pancake" about the same diameter as the Chicxulub impact Crater. If {{w|Jurassic Park}} were a real place, it could certainly cause a dinosaur extinction over there, if dropped on it.
|
|{{book|2|19}}
|
|-
|
|'''Elemental Worlds'''
|''"What if Mercury (the planet) were entirely made of mercury (the element)? What if Ceres was made of cerium? Uranus made of uranium? Neptune made of neptunium? What about Pluto made of plutonium?"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|Earth would (mostly) be fine. Mercury, uranium, neptunium, plutonium, and cerium would all replace the old planets. Changes are as follows:
*Pluto would be visible to the naked eye
*Ceres would be visible to the naked eye
*Mercury would be visible to the naked eye
*Uranus would look a fairly bright star in the night sky
*''When Neptune hits your eye, like a big pizza pie, that's an x-ray..''
|
|{{book|2|20}}
| 
|-
|
|'''Tire Rubber'''
|''"Rubber tires on millions of cars and trucks start with about ½" tread and end up bald. Rubber should be everywhere, or at least our highways should be made thicker. Where's the rubber?"''
<div align="right">—Fred</div>
|An average tire sheds about 1.6 liters of rubber over the course of its lifetime (from new to bald). If all tire rubber stuck to the road, it would rise by about a third of a millimeter per year. However, most tire rubber shavings are small enough to drift through the air, or for rain and wind to wash them off the road. Tire rubber is more than enough to cause environmental disruption and it's one of the leading causes of microplastics in our oceans.
|
|{{book|2|25}}
|
|-
|rowspan="10"|
|rowspan="10"|'''Short Answers #3'''
|''"How long do you think two people would have to kiss continuously before they had no lips left?"''
<div align="right">—Asli</div>
|That's not how lips work
|rowspan="10"|
|rowspan="10"{{book|2|26.5}} (S3)
|rowspan="10"|
|-
|''"My college friend and I have had this debate for years now: If you put a million hungry ants in a glass cube with one human, who's more likely to walk out alive?"''
<div align="right">—Eric Bowman</div>
|The human would try to break out of the cube, and probably succeed. Although disgusted, the human would probably be fine. Ants generally do not eat meat, preferring leaves and other foliage. If they escaped, both the human and the ants would go after the person who put them in the glass box. If they did not escape, both the human and the ants would eventually die of suffocation, assuming no air holes were installed.
|-
|''"What if all of humanity set all of their differences aside and work together to level out the Earth into a perfect sphere?"''
<div align="right">—Erik Andersen</div>
|This would quickly create new differences. Even if some magical force were employed to keep humanity centered on making the earth a perfect sphere, it would take many years and be almost impossible to do. Because the Earth is an oblate spheroid, and not a sphere as-is, a lot of land would need to be displaced in order to create a perfect sphere. There would need to be somewhere to put all the water in the oceans, which would need to be removed, and a way to move large amounts of land very long distances. Many cities would be buried, such as Amsterdam (average elevation -6.6').
|-
|''"People talk a lot about a space elevator or a building that would reach into low orbit to save time and resources getting things into space. This is going to sound incredibly stupid, but why has no one proposed building a road into space? Since orbit is generally considered to be 62 miles out, would it be possible to build a 62-mile-high mountain somewhere in the United States? Colorado would be my suggestion, since it has a low population density and is about a mile above sea level already."''
<div align="right">—Brian</div>
|Where are you going to get the materials to build the mountain? Also, Colorado has a lot of people in it. If we ignore the logistical implications, it still won't work. Cars take in air from various orifices to cool, among other things, the engine. No matter whether you have a gas, electric, hybrid or hydrogen car, the lack of air would cause the motors to quickly overheat.
|-
|''"If I shot a rocket and a bullet through Jupiter's center, would they come out the other side?"''
<div align="right">—James Wilson</div>
|No, as the leading theory is that Jupiter has a solid core. Shooting a bullet through the center would simply cause the bullet to collide with the core of the planet.
|-
|''"What if Mount Everest magically turned into pure lava? What would happen to life; would we all die?"''
<div align="right">—Ian</div>
|We would mostly be okay.
|-
|''"Can you fall down into the Mariana Trench, or would you just swim over it?"''
<div align="right">—Rodolfo Estrella</div>
|You can do both of those things. Assuming what he was trying to say was "Can you swim over the Marianas Trench without falling into it?" the answer is that you would just swim directly over it.
|-
|''"I play Dungeons & Dragons, and my DM doesn't want to let us use the Gust of Wind spell to push wind into the sails of a ship and make it move. Her argument is that you can't use this spell to move a ship because someone on a sailboat can't aim a fan at the sail to propel the boat. We argue that since the spell doesn't push you backward when you use it, then we should be able to use it to make the ship sail. She says she'll allow it only if you say so."''
<div align="right">—Georgia Paterson and Allison Adams</div>
|Since the spell doesn't push you backwards, it should work. If the spell pushed you backwards, you would just have to aim the spell backwards.
|-
|''"What if I struck a match on Titan? Would it light if there's no oxygen?"''
<div align="right">—Ethan Fitzgibbon</div>
| While the match would light initially due to the small amount of oxidizer in a matchhead (typically {{w|potassium chlorate}}, in a safety match), it would quickly dissipate due to the lack of oxygen to titan's atmosphere.
|-
|''"I posted a question on social media asking what would be the smallest change that would create the biggest disaster. One of the responses I got said "if every atom gained 1 proton." So my question for you is, what would happen if every atom gained 1 proton?"''
<div align="right">—Olivia Caputo</div>
|The Earth would become one big, very explosive science experiment. Stable atoms would become unstable, releasing large amounts of energy all at once. Brain matter would cease to be brain matter, and cells would no longer be cells. This would lead to everything dying at once. At least we wouldn't need to experience it.
|-
|
|'''Suction Aquarium'''
|''"When I was a child, I discovered that if I took a container into the swimming pool, I could fill it with water and then bring the container (open-end down) to the surface of the water, and the water level in my container was higher than the water level in the pool. What would happen if you tried to do this with a giant container and the ocean? Could you create a giant aquarium on top of the water that the animals could swim in and out of freely? Maybe an irregularly shaped container that you would walk around on to get closer to the fish?"''
<div align="right">—Caroline Collett</div>
|It would work, but the water level would slowly lower back to sea level over time. However, this process can be accelerated by whale farts. I am not joking.
|
|{{book|2|27}}
|
|-
|
|'''Earth Eye'''
|''"If the Earth were a massive eye, how far would it see?"''
<div align="right">—Alasdir</div>
|Its 'resolution' would be over 500 million times better than a normal human eye. It would be able to see the color of a shirt worn on Mars. It could also see incredibly far objects, such as some of the most distant galaxies that haven't been {{w|redshift}}ed to the point of being infrared. However, a planet-sized eye would be inconvenient, as it would certainly go blind from the Sun and could be damaged from nearby stars as well.
|
|{{book|2|28}}
|
|-
|
|'''Build Rome in a Day'''
|''"How many people would it take to build Rome in a day?"''
<div align="right">—Lauren</div>
| It would take anywhere between 15 minutes and 150 minutes with the whole Earth working.
|
|{{book|2|29}}
|
|-
|
|'''Mariana Trench Tube'''
|''"If I put an indestructible 20-meter-wide glass tube in the ocean that goes all the way down to the deepest part of the ocean, what would it be like to stand at the bottom? Assuming the sun goes directly overhead."''
<div align="right">—Zoki Čulo</div>
|You would likely see many new and undiscovered species. You would also be incredibly cold as the freezing waters of the deep would cool the glass. Getting up would be another problem entirely. If you didn't use an elevator, you could break the glass. That would create a geyser, accelerating you upwards at lethal G-forces. Once you reach the surface, you would fly high into the air before crashing back down into the ocean. Also, you would be heralded as a hero by a lot of marine biologists.
|
|{{book|2|30}}
|
|-
|
|'''MRI Compass'''
|''"Why don't compasses point toward the nearest hospital because of the magnetic fields created by MRI machines?"''
<div align="right">—D. Hughes</div>
|They actually do, but only within ~10 meters.
|
|{{book|2|32}}
|
|-
|
|'''Ancestor Fraction'''
|''"I noticed recently that the number of people within a family tree increases exponentially with each generation: I have 2 parents, 4 grandparents, 8 great-grandparents, and so on. Which got me thinking—are most people descended from the majority of Homo sapiens who have ever lived? If not, what fraction of all the people that have ever lived am I descended from?"''
<div align="right">—Seamus</div>
|Likely between 2-3 twenty-fourths of all humans who have ever lived.
|
|{{book|2|33}}
|
|-
|
|'''Bird Car'''
|''"I'm a lowly college student stuck in a car without AC. As such, the windows are down most of the time when I'm driving, and I started thinking: If a bird happens to match my speed and direction perfectly, and I swerve to catch the bird in my car ... what happens next, other than an angry bird? Does the bird stay right where it was? Fly into the windshield? Drop into the seat? My roommate and I disagree. Any help settling this would really make all our lives easier."''
<div align="right">—Hunter W.</div>
| The bird would fall onto the seat at an angle, and then would fly out of the window (hopefully).
|
|{{book|2|34}}
|
|-
|rowspan="4"|
|rowspan="4"|'''Weird & Worrying #2'''
|colspan="2"|''"What would happen if you put the end of a vacuum hose up to your eye and turned on the vacuum?"''
<div align="right">—Kitty Greer</div>
|rowspan="4"|
|rowspan="4"{{book|2|35.5}} (W2)
|rowspan="4"|
|-
|colspan="2"|''"Is it possible to hold your arm straight out of a car window and punch a mailbox clean off its pole? Could you do it without breaking your hand?"''
<div align="right">—Ty Gwennap</div>
|-
|colspan="2"|''"If people's teeth kept growing, but when they were fully grown they come off and are swallowed, how long would it take before it causes any problems?"''
<div align="right">—Valen M.</div>
|-
|colspan="2"|''"In a defensive situation, how much epinephrine (in a EpiPen) would it take to subdue a possible attacker?"''
<div align="right">—Henry M.</div>
|-
|
|'''Vacuum Tube Smartphone'''
|''"What if my phone was based on vacuum tubes? How big would it be?"''
<div align="right">—Johnny</div>
| The phone would be about the size of one to five city blocks, and would melt its way through the Earth's crust. Conversely, the UNIVAC constructed with modern electrical components would be smaller than a grain of salt.
|
|{{book|2|36}}
|
|-
|
|'''Eat a Cloud'''
|''"Could a person eat a whole cloud?"''
<div align="right">—Tak</div>
|Not unless you can squeeze the air out first. If you don't you will burp out more cloud than you ate.
|
|{{book|2|38}}
|
|-
|
|'''Tall Sunsets'''
|''"Let's say that two people of different heights (159 cm and 206 cm) stand beside each other while looking at the sunset. How much longer will the taller person be able to see the sun than the shorter one?"''
<div align="right">—Rasmus Bunde Nielson</div>
|Over a second longer.
|
|{{book|2|39}}
|
|-
|
|'''Sisyphean Refrigerators'''
|''"Suppose everyone with a fridge or a freezer opened them at the same time, outdoors. Would that amount of cooling be able to noticeably change the temperature? If not, how many fridges would it take to lower the temperature, say, 5 degrees F? What about even lower?"''
<div align="right">—Nicholas Mittica</div>
|Refrigerators don't work like that, and would likely increase global temperatures by 0.3 degrees celsius. The infinite spite of Hades is surprisingly green.
|
|{{book|2|41}}
|
|-
|
|'''Basketball Earth'''
|''"You know how when you spin a basketball on your finger you hit the side to make it go faster and balance it? If a meteor passes close enough to the earth, can it make the Earth spin faster like your hand does the basketball?"''
<div align="right">—Zayne Freshley</div>
|Yes.
|
|{{book|2|43}}
|
|- 
|
|'''Inhale a Person'''
|''"If house dust comprises up to 80 percent dead skin, how many people worth of skin does a person consume/inhale in a lifetime?"''
<div align="right">—Greg</div>
|You could inhale at most 3 gallons of human skin in a lifetime, and dust is not mostly dead skin. Instead it is a cursed salad of soil, pollen, cotton fibers, crumbs, powdered sugar, glitter, pet hair and dander, plastic, soot, human or animal hair, flour, glass, smoke, mites, and various miscellaneous gunk.
|
|{{book|2|45}}
|
|-
|
|'''Candy Crush Lightning'''
|''"How many Wint-O-Green Life Savers would it take to create a life-size lightning bolt if you crushed them"''
<div align="right">—Violet M.</div>
|Billions
|
|{{book|2|46}}
|
|-
|rowspan="13"|
|rowspan="13"|'''Short Answers #4'''
|''"Can humans safely eat rabid creatures?"''
<div align="right">—Winston</div>
|No.
|rowspan="13"|
|rowspan="13"{{book|2|46.5}} (S4)
|rowspan="13"|
|-
|''"What if the Earth's core suddenly stopped producing heat?"''
<div align="right">—Laura</div>
|We would be mostly fine. While one may picture a scenario similar to ''The Core'', the difference would only be noticed long after you're gone, so you don't really need to worry about it :)
|-
|''"Could humanity, with our current technology, destroy the Moon?"''
<div align="right">—Tyler</div>
|No.
|-
|''"Can global warming cause the Earth's magnetic fields to weaken?"''
<div align="right">—Pavaki</div>
|No.
|-
|''"If you used a laser, would you be able to bake something?"''
<div align="right">—Andrew Liu</div>
|Yes.
|-
|''"What if Earth was sliced in half, like an apple? Where should you be such that you have the best chance of survival?"''
<div align="right">—Anonymous</div>
|You should be holding the object that's slicing the Earth.
|-
|''"What would happen if a person dropped into a pool full of jellyfish?"''
<div align="right">—Lorenzo Belotti</div>
|It depends on the species.
|-
|''"Would it be possible to make a house floor into a massive air hockey table, so you could move heavy furniture across the room?"''
<div align="right">—Jacob Wood</div>
|Yes, and now I know what my next home improvement project will be.
|-
|''"My 7-year-old son asked us over dinner recently at which point potatoes melt (I assume in a vacuum). Please advise."''
<div align="right">—Steffen</div>
|Potatoes don't really melt at any temperature. Also, do you automatically add 'in a vacuum' to anything your son says?
|-
|''"Would a pigeon be able to make it to space if it was not affected by gravity?"''
<div align="right">—Nick Evans</div>
|No. The air in the upper atmosphere is too thin to breathe and too cold
|-
|''"If you were flying blind through the Milky Way what would be the odds of hitting a star or planet?"''
<div align="right">—David</div>
|If you flew edge-on, it would be about 1 in 10 billion.
|-
|''"On various bodies in our Solar System (feel free to group any that are equivalent), roughly how long could you survive on the surface (for gas giants, assume you are on a magical platform at some point in the atmosphere that you could reasonably treat as the surface) with nothing but an infinite air supply and warm winter clothing? That is, no helmet, no pressure suit, just a nose-and-mouth air mask attached to a magic air generator, and clothing that would be suitable for, say, Chicago in winter. (No cute tricks like using the magic air supply to generate heat or whatever.)"''
<div align="right">—Melissa Trible</div>
|
*Earth: 100-ish years
*Venus: Weeks to months
*Everywhere else: Minutes to hours
Venus would be great if it weren't for the sulfuric acid.
|-
|''"What would happen if someone dropped an anvil on you from space?"''
<div align="right">—Sam Stiehl</div>
|About the same as if someone dropped an anvil on you from a building.
|-
|
|'''Toasty Warm'''
|''"What if I want to heat my house using toasters. How many do I need?"''
<div align="right">—Peter Ahlström</div>
|Not many, because the house would quickly catch on fire.
|
|{{book|2|47}}
|
|-
|
|'''Eyeball'''
|''"If I pulled out my eyeball and aimed it so that it was looking into my other eyeball, what would I see (assuming the nerves and veins remain undamaged)"''
<div align="right">—Lenka</div>
|You would see an eye superimposed with your head and the background of the room overlapping.
|
|{{book|2|49}}
|
|-
|
|'''Japan Runs an Errand'''
|''"If ALL of Japan's islands disappear, would it affect Earth's natural phenomena (plates, oceans, hurricanes, climate, and so on)?"''
<div align="right">—Miyu Uchida</div>
|Yes, it most certainly would. The sea of Japan would mix with the Pacific ocean now that the wall that separated them is gone. This would cause unpredictable changes to those currents, affecting many life forms who live in that area. Japan, though being small, weighs quite a lot, and the sudden removal of all that weight would cause massive shifts in ocean levels. Depending on the region, some sea levels would rise/fall by up to a foot, causing mass panic for cities that now have a sudden risk of flooding at a moment's notice. Tsunamis would devastate the Korean Peninsula, Hawaii, and the west coast of America.
|
|{{book|2|50}}
|
|-
|
|'''Read All the Laws'''
|''"If a person wanted to read all of the governing documents that apply to them—from the federal and state constitutions, treaties, agency-issued regulations, federal and state laws, local ordinances, etc.—how many pages would they have to read?"''
<div align="right">—Keith Yearman</div>
|Between 145000 and 12.3 million pages.
|
|{{book|2|52}}
|
|-
|rowspan="3"|
|rowspan="3"|'''Weird & Worrying #3'''
|colspan="2"|''"If I were to jump into a container of liquid nitrogen (or dispose of a body that way), how deep would it have to be for me/them to shatter into frozen pieces at the bottom?"''
<div align="right">—Stella Wohnig</div>
|rowspan="3"|
|rowspan="3"{{book|2|52.5}} (W3)
|rowspan="3"|
|-
|colspan="2"|''"What would happen to you if a colony of ants suddenly appeared in you bloodstream all at once?"''
<div align="right">—Matt, on behalf of Declan</div>
|-
|colspan="2"|''"If Harry Potter forgets where the invisible entrance to Platform 9¾ is, how long would he have to crash into walls randomly before discovering it?"''
<div align="right">—Max Planker</div>
|-
|
|'''Snowball'''
|''"What if I tried to roll a snowball from the top of Mount Everest? How big would the snowball be by the time it reached the bottom and how long would it take?"''
<div align="right">—Michaeline Yates</div>
|It would remain about the same size, or it could cause an avalanche. Since the peak of {{w|Mount Everest}} is above the clouds, it is very dry there. For a snowball to grow, wet snow is required. The result would be similar to rolling a hamburger down.
|
|{{book|2|54}}
|
|-
|
|'''Walking Backward in Time'''
|''"What if you decided to walk from Austin, Texas, to New York City, but every step takes you back thirty days?"''
<div align="right">—Jojo Yawson</div>
| The sky would flicker at 50 Hz, and you would arrive around 300,000 years in the past.
|
|{{book|2|56}}
|
|-
|
|'''Ammonia Tube'''
|''"What would happen if you fed ammonia into your stomach through a tube? How fast must the flow rate be to burn your stomach from the heat released? What would the newly created chlorine gas do to your stomach?"''
<div align="right">—Becca</div>
|{{w|Ammonia}} is an {{w|EPA list of extremely hazardous substances|extremely hazardous substance}} and pumping it into your abdomen would result in a painful death due to ammonia toxicity. However, at the very least, some of it would be neutralized with your stomach acid.
|
|{{book|2|57}}
|
|-
|rowspan="7"|
|rowspan="7"|'''Short Answers #5'''
|''"Could life evolve in a constantly running microwave?"''
<div align="right">—Abby Doth</div>
|No.
|rowspan="7"|
|rowspan="7"{{book|2|58.5}} (S5)
|rowspan="7"|
|-
|''"Tonight at my work as an ER nurse in the emergency room, a patient (high on methamphetamine) asked for a cup of water. I returned with a paper cup of water, which the patient promptly threw at my head, missing me but hitting the wall in such an improbable way that the open top of the cup impacted the wall and the cup contained/diminished most of the subsequent splatter. It occurred to me that it might be possible to throw a cup of water hard enough that the container of water would go through the wall. Is this possible?"''
<div align="right">—Pete</div>
|Anything will go through a wall if you throw it hard enough
|-
|''"How slow would you have to chew in order to be able to infinitely consume breadsticks?"''
<div align="right">—Miller Broughton</div>
|You would have to divide each breadstick into 20 bites, chewing each bite 200 times at 1 chew per second.
|-
|''"If you were somehow to remove the white and yolk from inside an eggshell (chicken), and replace them with helium, would the eggshell float in the air?"''
<div align="right">—Elizabeth</div>
|No. An eggshell weighs more than the air it displaces.
|-
|''"What would stars smell like, if it were possible to smell them?"''
<div align="right">—Finn Ellis</div>
|Due to the free hydrogen molecules floating around in there, it would taste incredibly sour. It would also smell like burning rubber, as stars are made up of the same components.
|-
|''"What is the average size for every man-made object on the planet?"''
<div align="right">—Max Carver</div>
|Not too big, not too small. About average.
|-
|''"E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E<wbr>E"''
<div align="right">—Nate Yu</div>
|I feel you, Nate. [Editor's note: Nate's "question" is composed of 960 letters E]
|-
|
|'''Dog Overload'''
|''"Assuming 1 out of every 4 people has a 5-year-old dog, and the dog reproduces once every year, with 5 puppies, and the puppies start reproducing at 5 and stop at 15 and die at 20, how long would it take for the Earth to be flooded with puppies, assuming we have all the food, water, and oxygen to sustain them?"''
<div align="right">—Griffin</div>
|This is unrealistic right from the start. This assumes the total dog population is 2 billion, which is well above current estimates. A timeline of major events and milestones is listed below.
*After one year, there are enough dogs for everyone to have at least one.
*After 5 years, every human has an average of 6 or 7 dogs.
*After 11 years, Disney releases ''101 Dalmations per Capita'', after there are 101 dogs per person
*After 15 years, the first dogs die, but the death is fully insignificant.
*After 20 years, dogs would only be about 1 meter apart on average.
*After 25-30 years, the dogs begin to stack.
*At about 40 years, the exponential growth is "stable". The population is multiplying by about 1.6578 each year.
*After 65 years, the population of dogs reaches 1 mol
*After 110 years, the dogs start to undergo relativistic collapse
*After 150 years, the dogs are bigger than the solar system.
*After 197 years, the expansion of the dog sphere surpasses 1''c''
*After 200 years, the dogs reach sirius.
*After 250 years, the dogs envelop the milky way.
*After 330 years, the dogs reach the edge of the observable universe.
*After 417 years, Disney releases ''10<sup>101</sup> Dalmations.''
|
|{{book|2|60}}
|
|-
|
|'''Sunscreen'''
|''"Assuming that SPF works as it purports, what SPF would you need for a 1-hour trip to the surface of the sun?"''
<div align="right">—Brian and Max Parker</div>
|You would need SPF 3,200,000 or a giant blob of sunscreen. Despite its name, sunscreen only protects against some types of radiation from the Sun. No amount is going to be adequate protection if you are right inside the Sun. Also, sunscreen, being a gel, would evaporate when exposed to vacuum. When exposed to the plasma of the coronal surface or the Sun's interior, it would quickly ionize along with anything inside it, becoming plasma like the rest of the Sun.
|
|{{book|2|62}}
|
|-
|
|'''Walking on the Sun'''
|''"After the Sun runs out of fuel, it will become a white dwarf and slowly cool. When will it be cool enough to touch?"''
<div align="right">—Jabari Garland</div>
|The Sun will cool to room temperature in about 20 billion years. However, getting there to actually touch it is the hard part. The immense gravity the changed star still has would create a major problem for any attempt to land on and touch it. Even the most powerful propulsion would not be able to escape the pull of the Sun's gravity, making it nigh impossible for any currently theorised craft to reach the Sun and survive, let alone let you touch it 'safely'.
|
|{{book|2|63}}
|
|-
|
|'''Lemon Drops and Gumdrops'''
|''"What if all the raindrops were lemon drops and gumdrops?"''
<div align="right">—Shuo Peskoe-Yang</div>
|Replacing all rain in the world would have devastating conseqeunces, especially with such dry candies as lemon drops and gumdrops. The water cycle would be destroyed, arable land would become unusable, and the ocean the would dry up. Humanity would perish in this wasteland-like scenario, probably hopped up on sugar.
|
|{{book|2|64}}
|
|-
|
|'''Bonus Chapter'''
|''"...but what if we tried even ''more'' power?"''
<div align="right">—Randall Munroe</div>
| This is a continuation of {{what if|13|13: Laser Pointer}}. Adding even more power than the end of that article would heat the air so much that the lasers would stop themselves long before reaching the Moon. Even if we managed to get them to hit the Moon, the plasma created would be so hot that it would stop anyway.
|
|{{book|3|70}}
|{{book|19|2024|12|03|jgafb8G7i4o|But what if we tried MORE power?}}
|-
|}<noinclude>

<span id="Editors"><big><big>'''Editors'''</big></big></span> ㅤ ''[[#Article index|(jump back to table)]]''

These templates are used in this table: {{tl|what if}}, {{tl|What If}}, {{tl|book}}, {{tl|blog}}.

<big>'''Add YouTube video'''</big>

<nowiki>{{book|YT-NUMBER|YYYY|MM|DD|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen">'''''<nowiki>HTTPS://LINK</nowiki>'''''</font>|VIDEO-TITLE}}
'''EXAMPLE:''' <nowiki>{{book|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen">'''''2'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''2022'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''12'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''31'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LSyNhb5Y'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''What if everyone pointed a laser at the moon?'''''</font>}}

<big>'''Add book chapter'''</big>

For the first [[What If? (book)|What If? book]]:
<nowiki>{{book|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen">'''''1'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''CHAPTER-NUMBER'''''</font>}}

For the second [[What If? 2]] book:
<nowiki>{{book|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen">'''''2'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''CHAPTER-NUMBER'''''</font>}}

'''EXAMPLE:'''<nowiki>{{book|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen">'''''2'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''69'''''</font>}}

If an article is available exclusively on the third book ([[What If? 10th Anniversary Edition]]) and not in the first two, use this:
<nowiki>{{book|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen">'''''3'''''</font>|<font color="SeaGreen">'''''CHAPTER-NUMBER'''''</font>}}
<big>'''Link to a ''what if?'' article'''</big>

On this wiki, an easy way to link to a given ''what if?'' article is by using the {{Template|what if}} template. Copy and paste the text below, correcting the number and title (highlighted in green) to get this result:

'''EXAMPLE:'''
See the <nowiki>''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' article ''{{what if|</nowiki><font color="SeaGreen"><ins>'''''158'''''</ins></font>|<font color="SeaGreen"><ins>'''''Hot Banana'''''</ins></font>}}<nowiki>''</nowiki>.
'''RESULTS IN:'''
See the ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' article ''{{what if|158|Hot Banana}}''.

NOTE: Since the blog releases are now random, please write a comment on [[{{LATESTCOMIC}}#Discussion|the newest comic's talk page]] to announce that a new ''what if?'' article is out.

<big>'''Add name of reader who asked the question.'''</big>

Here's how to add the name(s) to any question on the table. For example, this...
<nowiki>|''"What if all the raindrops were lemon drops and gumdrops?"''
|Human civilization would collapse, and we would all die.</nowiki>
... becomes this:
<nowiki>|''"What if all the raindrops were lemon drops and gumdrops?"''
<div align="right"></nowiki>'''—'''<font color="SeaGreen">'''''InsertNamesHere'''''</font><nowiki></div>
|Human civilization would collapse, and we would all die.</nowiki>
Copy the code and replace the green part! (NOTE: It uses the em-dash, not a normal hyphen, so don't replace the dash, or use <code>&mdash;</code>.) Transcribe it exactly as it is written on the website or book, including parenthesis and age, if given by Randall. '''Protip for desktop users:''' the text looks ALL CAPS on the site, but if you copy and paste it, it's in normal Sentence Case. You can simply copy and paste.

''[[#Article index|(jump back to table)]]''
<span id="bottom"></span>
{| style="border: 1px solid {{{border|gray}}}; background-color: {{{color|#fdffe7}}};"
|rowspan="2" style="vertical-align:middle;" | {{{{{|safesubst:}}}#ifeq:{{{2}}}|alt|[[File:What If Barnstar.jpeg|100px]]|[[File:What If Barnstar.jpeg|100px]]}}
|rowspan="2" |
|style="font-size: x-large; padding: 0; vertical-align: middle; height: 1.1em;" | '''The What If? Project Barnstar'''
|-
|style="vertical-align: middle; border-top: 1px solid gray;" | <div style="font-family: Cormorant Garamond"><span style="font-size:5pt;color:black">

* <span style="background-color:#9eff9e;"><span style="color:green; font-size:1.4em;">''' ✓'''</span><big> '''Added: '''</big></span> All ~140 book-exclusive articles, each color-coded by book; reader question and Randall's answer for almost all ~70 [[What If? 2]]-exclusive articles; EVERY YouTube video and its associated article; over new 130 thumbnails uploaded; new article from [[What If? 10th Anniversary Edition|the new book]] and the [[what if? (blog)#top|deleted article]].

* <span style="background-color:#9eff9e;"><span style="color:green; font-size:1.4em;">''' ✓'''</span><big> '''Changes: '''</big></span> Merged columns No., Release date, and Weeks since last release; every column now easily sortable; columns Blog, Book (new), and YouTube (new) now use {{template|blog}} and {{template|book}} and are color-coded; split ''Short-Answer Sections'' into different cells; title bold and question italics and quoted!

----

Great Job to everyone who helped out on this project! If you helped out explain the articles or build the table, feel free to sign here: '''[[User:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:5pt;color:#A9C6CA">42.book.addict</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:42.book.addict|<span style="font-family:Cormorant Garamond;font-size:2pt;color:#516874">Talk to me!</span>]]</sup>''' 17:44, 14 February 2025 (UTC), [[User:WriterArtistCoder|WriterArtistCoder]]<sup>[[User talk:WriterArtistCoder|talk to me]]</sup> 21:56, 11 March 2025 (UTC), [[User:FaviFake|FaviFake]] ([[User talk:FaviFake|talk]]) 15:53, 12 March 2025 (UTC) --'''''[[User:DollarStoreBa'al |<span style="font-family:Atomic Age;font-size:5pt;color:red;">DollarStoreBa'al</span>]]<sup>[[User talk:DollarStoreBa'al |'''''Converse''''']]</sup>[[DSBContribs |'''''My life choices''''']] 23:30, 14 June 2025 (UTC

[[Category:What If?| 9]]{{xkcdmeta}}

980: Money

2026-05-15T16:16:00Z

FaviFake: Undo revision 412315 by 68.187.4.2 (talk)

{{comic
| number = 980
| date = November 21, 2011
| title = Money
| image = money.png
| titletext = There, I showed you it.
}}
{{TOC}}Clicking on the image on [https://xkcd.com xkcd.com] takes you to an [https://xkcd.com/980/huge/ interactive] and much larger image. On the interactive image there are two links: one takes you to the [https://xkcd.com/980/sources/ sources and downloads] page where a list of sources and the [https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png full image] can be downloaded.

==Explanation==
{{incomplete|The US foreign aid section has a typo---it lists economic/humanitarian aid as equaling military aid when in fact (as of publication) it was much greater. Plus, the boxes have sizes not reflecting the numbers shown, further suggesting that this is a typo [[Special:Contributions/35.151.32.161|35.151.32.161]] 03:57, 6 December 2025 (UTC)

this should be added somewhere}}
{{Quote| I had a huge amount of fun putting the money chart together. It was the first time in a long time that my life’s been stable enough that I’ve been able to really disappear into a project—I’d almost forgotten how enjoyable it can be.|[[Randall Munroe]]|[https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/11/24/money-chart/ Source]}}

This is a [[:Category:Charts|chart]] comic - a type of comic that [[Randall]] does from time to time. He has for instance done [[256: Online Communities|maps of the Internet]] ([[802: Online Communities 2|twice]]!) and other huge visualizations like this chart [[Radiation]] with a similar structure as this chart but with Radiation as the subject. The Radiation chart is most likely the inspiration for this much more comprehensive Money chart.

In this money chart there are five boxes with items on different scales of monetary value denoting prices and values of many things, big and small (with the values contemporary to the comic's release in 2011; most are now more expensive due to inflation). Each scale of dollar increments are different colors. One dollar increments are green - naturally, because American paper money is green. Thousands are orange/red. Millions are gray. Billions are yellow. Trillions are blue. This comic uses {{w|Long and short scales|the short scale}} for naming large numbers (so a billion = 1000 millions = 10<sup>9</sup> rather than a million millions = 10<sup>12</sup> as in continental Europe).

Included in one frame is a small man with a red and white striped shirt, blue pants, a cane and a knit cap. He is known as Wally or Waldo (in the US) from the {{w|Where's Wally?|''Where's Waldo?'' books}}. To not give anything away for those who wish to search for him themselves there will be no spoiler here. But if someone needs a little help... Then by clicking this [[980: Money/Transcript#Billions|link]] you will be directed to the relevant section amongst the five sections where Waldo can be found. (The link will take you to that section of the full transcript page). If you still cannot find him (or give up in advance) then just search the transcript page for Wally or Waldo. There is a [[Header text#Money|unique header text]] for this comic.

The title text is a reference to the phrase "Show me the money!" which originates from the film ''{{w|Jerry Maguire}}''.

===Extra Money pages===
Since this comic is so big and complicated, extra pages have been created to include much more information than is wished for on this main page. These pages are listed here for convenience, but they are also listed in the relevant sections below:
* '''[[980: Money/Transcript]]''' - The full transcript of the entire comic can be found here. It is linked from the [[#Transcript|Transcript]] section.
* '''[[980: Money/Prices in tables]]''' The complete list of every item in the comic.

===Tables with explanations===
====Dollars====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-left
|The price of various common bills and commodities. The One Dollar Menu is a type of menu at various fast food restaurants. The one dollar bill and ten dollar bill are likely used for reference points. A Starbucks coffee actually ranges in price from $1.95 to $2.15 depending on the location.
|-
|Middle-left
|Pet Ownership. The {{w|ASPCA}} is the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals. The most expensive animal on this list may seem surprising; rabbits cost an average of 35 dollars more than dogs and 70 dollars more than cats.
|-
|Bottom-right
|Four boxes indicate that the CEO pay has skyrocketed from $490.31 (hourly) to $5,419.97 (hourly) in the same time period in which the average worker's salary has grown 10 cents.
|}

====Thousands====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-right
|Hogwarts degree: a reference to {{w|Hogwarts|Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy}} from the popular book series by {{w|J. K. Rowling|J. K. Rowling}} about {{w|Harry Potter}}.
One box is the estimated yearly tuition for the school and the next is how much seven years at the school would cost. To get a degree at the school, it takes 7 years (starting at age 11, ending at age 18).
|-
|Bottom
|A reference to the song by {{w|Barenaked Ladies}} entitled "{{w|If I Had $1000000}}" and all the things referenced in the song to buy the love of another person.
|-
|Middle-Right
|A few items on the marriage of {{w|Wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton|Kate Middleton and Prince William}}, the major royal wedding of 2011, including:
*a {{w|Wedding dress of Kate Middleton|wedding dress with its own Wikipedia page}} of 3 times the annual per capita income of the average UK person,
*an 8-tier [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1381944/Royal-Wedding-cake-Kate-Middleton-requested-8-tiers-decorated-900-flowers.html wedding cake],
*and the flowers for the wedding. These re-appear in the Millions section of the graph, where they also list the costs for the security around the event ($20 million).
|}

====Millions====
{| class="wikitable"
|Left
|Dr. Evil's ransom demands from the film "Austin Powers" corrected for inflation between 1969 and 1997.
|-
|Middle-right
|Another reference to J. K. Rowling, comparing her (actual $1 billion) net worth as an author with her (imagined $82,000) net worth as a rapper.
The magnified 82 orange/red ($1,000) boxes are footnoted "Professional assessment by rapper/geek culture expert MC Frontalot." {{w|MC Front-A-Lot}} is the creator of the subgenre of {{w|hip-hop}} known as {{w|Nerd Core}}.
|-
|Middle
|An {{w|Lockheed Martin F-22 Raptor|F-22 Raptor fighter jet}} (valued at $154.5M) is compared to a Velociraptor ($1.9M in production costs for the film Jurassic Park)
|}

====Billions====
{| class="wikitable"
|Top-Left ((Fictional)Billionaires section)
|{{w|Carlisle Cullen}} is from the {{w|Twilight (series)|''Twilight'' series}} of books and movies. He is a vampire and adoptive father of {{w|Edward Cullen|Edward}}, {{w|Emmett Cullen|Emmett}} and {{w|Alice Cullen (Twilight)|Alice Cullen}}, as well as {{w|Rosalie Hale|Rosalie}} and {{w|Jasper Hale}}. He was born in the 1640s and amassed his wealth through many years of compound interest and investments.
|{{w|Scrooge McDuck}} is a cartoon character from many {{w|Disney}} properties including the afternoon cartoon, ''{{w|Duck Tales}}''. Scrooge McDuck has a "money bin" full of coins and other sorts of collectibles that he routinely [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMU2NwaaXEA goes swimming in].
|{{w|Bruce Wayne}} is {{w|Batman}}. {{w|Batman}} is {{w|Bruce Wayne}}. He is portrayed in many comic books, graphic novels, TV shows and movies by many different actors.
|{{w|Artemis Fowl II|Artemis Fowl}} is an Irish child prodigy and a ruthless master criminal from the {{w|Artemis Fowl (series)|eponymous book series}}. He uses his intelligence to build his family fortune through crime.
|}

====Trillions====
{| class="wikitable"
|As Randall already indicated in the transcript, this is the block for world, continent and nation finances. The numbers are really huge. There are no jokes in here (apart from the fact that Randall tried to make the shapes of the GDP look like the continent), likely because financial values this large aren't funny to start with.
|-
|GDP is {{w|gross domestic product}}, the market value of all goods and services produced in a nation.
*The major chart in the center shows the development of the GDP in the world since the 1940s. So far the US GDP has always grown, except for a small reduction in the early 1980s, a flat line around the 1991 global recession and a flat line in the second half of the naughts. The world-wide GDP is growing more rapidly, but is also much more volatile.
|-
|In the middle of the box, it shows the worth of all gold ever mined in 2011 prices. This is important because of the concept of the {{w|gold standard}}, a concept where monetary values are linked to the value of gold. As indicated in the top-right of the box, both the EU and the USA have more debt than the total value of all gold in the world.
|-
|{{w|Derivative (finance)|Derivatives}} are a complex financial instrument where one is not trading in something tangible, but in derived values - like options. Derivatives thus are dangerous as one trades in concepts instead of values. Critics claim that derivatives are at the base of the 'economic bubble'.
*The growth of the derivatives market size is incredible - more than doubling every four years. The derivatives market thus is much larger than the GDP of the entire world.
*We get a reference to [http://landartgenerator.org/blagi/archives/127 a proposed project to power the world] by erecting massive solar farms out in the deserts. The area of Texas alone would be enough to match almost all of our modern power costs (though the people who live in Texas wouldn't enjoy being displaced).
|}

==Transcript==
:'''[This transcript is only reproducing text visible on the [https://www.xkcd.com/980/ front page comic]. For the full transcript of the [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png huge image], see [[980: Money/Transcript]].]'''

:[Title panel at the top left has one large heading, and then it is possible to read the first and third out of five lines (but not for instance the second line which is just the word "almost"):]
:'''Money'''<br>
:A chart of<br>
:all of it<br>
:[Below this there are 5 large panels, each with a series of plots, comparing the values of various things. The only clearly visible text is the title of each panel written in white on black background at the top of each panel]<br>
:[The first section covers single coffees up to the hourly salaries of CEOs. It is located below the title panel and there are a lot of green groups marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Dollars'''
:[The next section discusses values from around $1000 to $1,000,000, including a dissection of the song If I had $1000000. It is located directly below the Dollars section and has mainly orange groups (but also some green) marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Thousands'''
:[The third section focuses on $1,000,000 to $1,000,000,000, with a large section on campaign contributions of American political presidential campaigns, values of expensive works of art, and J. K. Rowling. It is located to the right of the Thousands section below the Billions section and there are a lot of gray groups (but also some orange) marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Millions'''
:[The fourth section gets into larger scale finances, profits of various sectors, costs of natural disasters, and net worths of the richest people on the planet. Also, Donald Trump. It is located to the right of the Dollars section and above both the Millions and Trillions section and has mainly yellow groups (but also some gray and red) all marked by unreadable text. There are, however, a few large headings that can be read:]
:'''Billions'''
:Education
:The Economic (...?)
:US household income
:Federal budget
:[In the last panel global financial status is described. It discusses derivatives, liquid assets, public debt by nation and GDP by continent, culminating with the total economic production of the human race to date. It is located below the Billions section to the right of the Millions section and has mainly cyan groups (but also one yellow) all marked by unreadable text.]
:'''Trillions'''
:'''[For the full transcript of the [http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/money_huge.png huge image], see [[980: Money/Transcript]].]'''

==Trivia==
* Randall usually posts new comics at around midnight Eastern time, but this comic was posted at about noon. The reason is that it was difficult to get it all finished in time, as was explained in the [[Blag]] post titled [https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/11/24/money-chart/ Money chart] released three days later. This post also states that this was the first big project he undertook after his [https://blog.xkcd.com/2011/06/30/family-illness/ fiancée was diagnosed] with breast [[:Category:Cancer|cancer]].

* This comic used to be [https://web.archive.org/web/20211215032232/https://store.xkcd.com/products/money-poster available as a poster] in the xkcd store before it was [[Store|shut down]].

* Randall misspelled "communicat'''i'''on" as "communication" in the section on campaign donations, on the right of the "Millions" quadrant. This hasn't been fixed.

* This is the first xkcd comic featuring [[Donald Trump]].

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics with color]]
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[[Category:The Lion King]]
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[[Category:Twilight]] 
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[[Category:Climate change]] 
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User:FaviFake

2026-05-15T16:14:27Z

FaviFake:

2881: Bug Thread

2026-05-15T16:03:18Z

FaviFake:

{{comic
| number = 2881
| date = January 15, 2024
| title = Bug Thread
| image = bug_thread_2x.png
| imagesize = 317x495px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = After some account issues, we've added 6 new people from the beach house rental website support forum.
}}

==Explanation==

A bug thread is an online discussion about unintended behavior in a program, also known as a {{w|Software bug|bug}}. Bug threads may be found on bug trackers, such as Github or Bugzilla, on technical forums such as StackOverflow, or on general product user forums.

Most bug threads have a rule to only leave a comment if you have something insightful to add,{{Actual citation needed}} such as being able to reproduce how the bug occurs or possible solutions to resolving it. In practice, this rule is often ignored and many threads end up with multiple people simply commenting that the bug still exists. It could be argued that this, in itself, is additional information, since it gives an indication of how widespread and/or persistent the problem is. Those who are perfectly content with a product have few reasons to participate in a bug thread, so those seeking help will tend to mostly read posts by the others who are, or have been, seeking help, if no one has provided a proper solution.

In this comic, multiple people are reporting the problem, as we can tell from their distinctive profile pictures. Most of the visible posts simply state the poster's inclusion in the list of those affected by the bug, either with a one word reply ("Same"), or a shorthand expression of emotion ("{{w|Like button|+1}}. So frustrating."). Some posters, however, do provide somewhat more useful information: existing troubleshooting methods haven't worked for them, with one even providing three links to the specific solutions that they have already unsuccessfully tried.

Although we cannot see the unreadable timestamp information on the posts, one author (the penultimate, using a [[White Hat]] image) makes the observation that the problem has now been ongoing for five years. This is followed by a [[Cueball]]-identified user proposing that this group of like-minded individuals may enjoy meeting up at a {{w|beach house}} in the physical world. Whether this is [[Randall]], or not, his own follow-up comic commentary suggests that bonding over such adversity is as good a reason for friendship as any.

The title text reveals that the meet-up was actually attempted. However, ironically, some of the participants seem to have run into "account issues" when trying to make their reservations, meaning that the website where they tried to rent the beach house wasn't working properly for them. Fortunately that website contained an online support forum like the one in the comic, and six participants from that forum ended up joining the social group. It is unclear whether the meet-up actually ended up occurring, but at least everyone involved now has some new friends.

[[979: Wisdom of the Ancients]] also refers to an online discussion thread about a bug, and [[1305: Undocumented Feature]] also involves a tech support forum which is eventually used only for socializing.

==Transcript==
:[Part of a discussion thread in progress on an online forum is shown. Each comment has the writer's avatar to the left of the text and small illegible text immediately above the text. Part of the first comment's text is cut off at the top.]
:Commenter #1 (icon is a portrait of a stick figure's head with the top half obscured): Same issue here.
:Commenter #2 (icon is a full-body picture of Cueball): I'm having this problem too. None of the posted fixes work.
:Commenter #3 (icon is a thick black stripe going across the icon square from its upper-rightmost corner to its lower-leftmost, with another black stripe in the lower-rightmost corner): Same.
:Commenter #4 (icon is a portrait of Megan's head): +1. So frustrating.
:Commenter #5 (icon is a full-body picture of Hairy left of a horizontal line above an unintelligible shape and a small scribble): I'm still having this. Did you all ever figure out a fix?
:Commenter #6 (icon is a forward-facing bust of Miss Lenhart): Same problem as everyone. I tried the steps in the posts <u>here</u>, <u>here</u>, and <u>here</u>. Nothing.
:Commenter #7 (icon is a pure black square with a white circle in the center): Add me to the list.
:Commenter #8 (icon is a portrait of White Hat's head): Same. Ugh. Can't believe this thread is 5 years old now.
:Commenter #9 (icon is a forward-facing portrait of Cueball): Where does everyone live? Do we want to get a beach house for a weekend or something?
:[Caption below the image:]
:At some point, you just have to give up on fixing the bug and embrace the fact that you have dozens of new friends.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring White Hat]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]
[[Category:Internet]]
[[Category:Social interactions]]

2765: Escape Speed/Tables

2026-05-15T16:00:33Z

FaviFake:

Here you can find more detailed tables and lists needed for the explanation of the interactive comic [[2765: Escape Speed]].

==Planets==
This is a different attempt to list and explain all the planets and other objects that have gravity and can be landed upon and explored.

The description and explanations may be incomplete or incorrect. Please help improve them. Try to keep separate the ''description'' (i.e. how the planet looks and what general features it has) and ''explanation'' (i.e. what the name and look represent, what they refer to both in the real and fictional worlds and what xkcd comics may have been a source or an inspiration. Please describe the planets only, not the objects that can be found on them.

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! Name<br/><code>code-name</code>
! Tiles (X, Y)
! Directions
! Description
! Explanation
|-
| '''Starting Planet'''<br/><code>tiny-world</code>
| (6024, -8976)
| To get here, click the "Home" button in the lower right corner of the comic.
|
The planet is tiny, grassy, has a few trees and bushes and features several people. Initially the navigation is difficult because of low initial engine thrust and strong gravity of the Origin planet nearby affecting movement.
|
This is where the game starts. Pressing the "Home" button to go back to the starting planet shows the message, "Welcome back, pilot", which may be a reference to the greeting that plays when re-entering a Titan in the ''Titanfall'' video games.

|-
| '''Origin'''<br/><code>origin</code>
| (3096, -5904)
| To get here, launch from Beret Guy saying "Wow!" on the Starting Planet.
|
The planet is fairly big, has vegetation, and features many people, landscape objects, items and upgrades. It has a shaft through the center. The planet is hard to leave without any upgrades unless one uses the shaft to gain more momentum by thrusting while moving through the middle of it. Many of the landmarks of the surface mark the directions to different planets.
|
The planet has a sign saying 'Welcome to Origin! You can never leave™'. The name may also refer to the fact that the planet lies almost at the center of the game world, or that it is the starting point for exploration as it provides many navigational hints.

|-
| '''Hollow Planet'''<br/><code>hollow-shell</code>
| (-13952, 1848)
| To get here, launch from the St. Louis Arch on Origin.
|
The planet is just a shell with some gaps. On the outside, there are a few signs that mark the directions to different planets.
|

|-
| '''Round Planet'''<br/><code>orb</code>
| (-19154, -7288)
| To get here, launch from the tower with an orb on it on Origin or the sign on the Hollow Planet.
|
The planet is moderately small with no vegetation and some architecture such as Stonehenge and the Great Wall of China. It also features a few people and items.
|
|-
| '''Uzumaki'''<br/><code>uzumaki</code>
| (-3904, -26904)
| To get here, launch from Origin's spiral landmark, the sign on the Hollow Planet, or below the plane-towed banner on the Round Planet.
| The planet is a large spiral overgrown with grass and some other vegetation. It has very weak gravity.
| The shape of the planet is inspired by the {{w|manga}} {{w|Uzumaki}} by {{w|Junji Ito}}.
|-
| '''Guitar Ship'''<br/><code>guitar-ship</code>
| (-12000, -30000)
| To get there, launch from Uzumaki, a little to the left of the caffeine molecule item, or from the musicians singing "it's more than a feeling" on origin.
| The planet is shaped like a guitar seen in perspective looking from the bottom of the body, with a dome on the back side. Within the dome there's the Boston skyline.
| This is a reference to the cover art of the album {{w|Boston (album)|Boston}} by the like-named American {{w|Boston (band)|rock band}}. It's one of many references to {{w|Boston}} in the game.
|-
| '''Spacetime Soccer Field'''<br/><code>soccerfield</code>
| (6048, 4048)
| To get here, launch from Origin, from the pyramid with a soccer ball on top of it.
|
This is a tiny planet with a smooth surface and a distorted soccer field marked around it. The goals and goal area lines are on the opposite sides of the planet (let's say, to the east and west), distorted into curved trapezoids. The touch lines (side lines) are sections of hyperbolas with the vertices closest to the planet at the north and south poles, extending symmetrically to some distance from the planet. There is no goal line; in this geometry it should be the extended axis. What seems to be penalty lines, but drawn incorrectly to join the side lines instead of going back to the goal line, are sections of an ellipse. The halfway line appears twice, joining the four ends of hyperbolic side lines. The center circle appears as two separate halves stemming from the two copies of the halfway line.
|
The space soccer field utilizes the concept from [[2705: Spacetime Soccer]], but inversed: in the original comic the center point of the field was located in a gravity well, causing the ball to be pulled away from the goals; here the goals are located close to the center of the planet, so the ball naturally tries to fall towards them, probably making the game more interesting.
|-
| '''Saturn'''<br/><code>saturn</code>
| (2600, 14000)
| To get here, launch from the pyramid with Saturn on it on Origin. If you see the Spacetime Soccer Field, you're too far left.
| The planet resembles Saturn with its rings, however it is translucent: a soccer ball can bee seen inside. One of the ball's white hexagons is surfacing in the north pole area.
| It is a reference to [[2513: Saturn Hexagon]]
|-
| '''Andal'''<br/><code>platform-planet</code>
| (12048, 14048)
| To get there launch from a monument on Origin, featuring a round shape with a small "T" on top.
| This is a small partly rocky and partly grassy planet with a strange T-shaped tower.
| A reference to ''{{w|Animorphs}}'' book series featuring fictional sapient species of [https://aliens.fandom.com/wiki/Andalite Andalites]. Two such (or similar) creatures can be found on the planet. In the original books, the planet the Andalites come from is unnamed.
|-
| '''Projection of Earth'''<br/><code>earth-map</code>
| (-15808, 22192)
| To get there by follow the sign on the hollow planet or launch from the Earth map monument on Origin.
| The planet is shaped like a huge distorted map of all land masses of Earth. The player's spaceship can fly where water would be, but it can't go over land. Some straights between islands are to narrow for the ship to pass, especially in the {{w|Southeast Asia}} area. Some {{w|mediterranean seas}} are also inaccessible.
| Probably a reference to [[977: Map Projections]] or, more generally, to the Randall's obsession about [[:Category:Maps|maps]].
|-
| '''Voyager 1'''<br/><code>voyager-1</code>
| (1606, -14282)
| To get here, launch from the "Receiving transmission" communication device near the spiral landmark on Origin.
| This is a recreation of the {{w|Voyager 1}} space probe.
|
|-
| '''Voyager 2'''<br/><code>voyager-2</code>
| (10682, -5172)
| To get here, launch from the "Receiving transmission" communication device near the spider landmark on Origin.
| This is a recreation of the {{w|Voyager 2}} space probe.
|
|-
| '''SafetySat'''<br/><code>safetysat</code>
| (17024, 1024)
| To get here, launch from the cell tower on Origin.
| A cube satellite with an absurd set of assorted objects on board.
| This is a reference to [[1992: SafetySat]].
|-
| '''Shuttle Skeleton'''<br/><code>space-shuttle</code>
| (-30200, 14576)
| To get here, launch from the Shuttle Skeleton landmark on Origin or in the northwestern direction from Alaska on the Projection of Earth.
| The planet looks like an outline of the space shuttle with a strange skeleton inside.
| This is a reference to [[2630: Shuttle Skeleton]].
|-
| '''Giant Spider'''<br/><code>spider</code>
| (26982, -8714)
| To get here, launch from the spider landmark on Origin.
| The object is a giant spider floating in space with eight people standing on top of his legs.
| [[:Category:Spiders|Spiders]] is a recurring theme on xkcd.
|-
| '''Diffraction Spikes Star'''<br/><code>diffraction</code>
| (-19944, 11240)
| To get here, launch from the back of the left "hand" of the Shuttle Skeleton or the north of Alaska.
| The object is a star with very long spikes.
| This is a reference to [[2762: Diffraction Spikes]].
|-
| '''Roche Lobe Earth'''<br/><code>earth-roche</code> ''and'' <code>normal-moon</code>
| (-9952, -3952)
| To get there, launch from the like-shaped statue on Origin.
| This is a small, distorted, drop-shaped Earth with oceans and continents of the northern hemisphere. There's the Moon close by. The distortion looks like if the Moon's tidal forces are pulling northern Atlantic Ocean really hard.
|
|-
| '''Dark Matter Planet'''<br/><code>dark-matter</code>
| (-2892, 2640)
| To get here, launch from the goal on the half of the field with just one person on it on Spacetime Soccer Field.
| This is a small, irregular planet with a black center (normal planets have white centers) and an inscription "DARK MATTER" inside, repeated three times.
|
{{w|Dark matter}} is a hypothetical form of {{w|matter}} sought by {{w|Astrophysics|astrophycists}} as a possible cause of behavior of {{w|Galaxy|galaxies}}, which cannot be explained by the current theory of {{w|gravity}} and observations. The anomalies would be explained if there was extra {{w|mass}} in the galaxies, which is not observed, but is theorized as dark matter presence. The dark matter is named this way not because it has some dark color, but because it supposedly does not interact (or interacts very weakly) with {{w|electromagnetic field}}, therefore does not emit {{w|light}} and can't be seen.

This is also a reference to [[2186: Dark Matter]]
|-
| '''Jurassic Park Planet'''<br/><code>gravity-qwantz</code>
| (20000, 11000)
| To get here, launch from the dinosaur on Origin or from the Andalites on Andal.
| It's a big planet with weak gravity, a lot of grass, and many dinosaur figures, some repeating a few times.
|
This is a reference to the 1993 {{w|Jurassic Park (film)|''Jurassic Park''}} film and the related {{w|Jurassic Park|media franchise}}. It contains images of dinosaurs taken from the [https://www.qwantz.com/ Dinosaurs] web comic, which, similarly to xkcd, uses a random string of letters for its domain name: <code>quantz.com</code>. It also reflects Randal's avid interest in [[:Category:Dinosaurs|dinosaurs]]. This is an exact copy of the Dinosaur Planet from [[2712: Gravity]].
|-
| '''Comet 67P'''<br/><code>67p</code>
| (18048, -11152)
| To get here, launch from the duck next to the 'Caution: long vertical drop' sign on Origin.
| This is a small, potato-shaped body, modelled after the {{w|67P/Churyumov–Gerasimenko}} comet.
|
This is a reference to the 2004–2016 {{w|Rosetta (spacecraft)|Rosetta}} spacecraft mission, which was the first to place a lander ({{w|Philae (spacecraft)|Philae}}) on a comet core. The mission was also commemorated in [[1446: Landing]] and the spacecraft are mentioned in [[1402: Harpoons]] and [[1740: Rosetta]].
|-
| '''What If? Planet'''<br/><code>gravity-earth</code>
| (22000, 34000)
| To get here, launch from the two people explaining where Boston is on Origin, the left of Stonehenge on the Round Planet, or the left rim of the Guitar Ship.
| This is a huge, round planet with many bodies of water. The planet contains several scenes from ''[[what if? (blog)|what if?]]'' and [[2712: Gravity]]. Megan and Cueball are floating inside a small space in the center of the planet.
| This is an almost exact copy of the Earth planet from [[2712: Gravity]], however all text spoken by the characters has been removed, making puns difficult to grasp without referring to the original. Some scenes have been removed, some modified slightly.
|-
| '''Subway Planet'''<br/><code>subway-planet</code> ''and'' <code>black-hole-3</code>
| (-46000, -24000)
| To can get there take off from the "secret glade" item next to the the bush where someone says "Shhh" on Origin.
|
This is a huge planet with a subway system connecting places named after U.S. cities, similar to the one from [[1196: Subways]]. In the area where Boston should be according to that system, there is a giant round hole with rugged sides consisting of a lot of broken planks. There's a black hole inside, off the center, in the Washington, D.C. area. There are many people and features both on the surface and within subway tunnels.
|
This is a key planet to solve the puzzle in the game, and contains several out of many in-game references to {{w|Boston}} (in many meanings of the name) and the {{w|Massachusetts Institute of Technology}}, which currently is located in {{w|Cambridge, Massachusetts}}, but was founded in 1861 in Boston.

Obviously, it's also a reference to [[1196: Subways]]
|-
| '''Boston Planet'''<br/><code>mbta</code>
| (-42000, 8000)
| To get here, launch from the back of the Shuttle Skeleton.
|
This is a big, perfectly round planet with a subway system. It is invisible until the player finds uncloaking device switch. Initially, all underground tunnels are blocked by huge round rocks with the letter "T" at the entrances and smaller round rocks down the tunnels. To unblock the tunnels, player needs to find subway tokens scattered in the universe; they appear only after the Boston planet is uncloaked. Subway stations on the surface and inside are marked with Boston district names.
|
This is the other key planet to the game puzzle. It is apparently the round part ripped off the Subway Planet, but drawn not to scale. The tunnels inside the planet roughly correspond to the Boston part of the scheme in [[1196: Subways]], but with few additions (e.g. Union Sq, Mattapan). The codename comes from the abbreviation of {{w|Massachusetts Bay Transportation Authority}}.
|-
| '''Crystal Sphere'''<br/>''from'' <code>ring-1</code> ''to'' <code>ring-36</code>
|
| To get here, launch from anywhere and keep avoiding planets until you hit it.
|
Most planets and celestial objects are inside of a thick enormous ring called Crystal Sphere. Both the interior and exterior edges of the Sphere are almost smooth, but have a few dents. There's a wide navigable crack leading out of the Sphere, which sides are rugged and riddled with broken planks, similarily to the Boston hole in the Subway Planet. The gravity increases significantly as the spaceship goes through the crack, it gradually feels the pull from the parts of the sphere it has left. It is not possible to leave the Sphere without the hyperdrive, however having collected all the engine upgrades inside the Sphere one can barely reach the outer surface, but moving along is very difficult. Above the crack, there is an arch made up of the repeating words "The End", which is reminiscent of the "Don't leave the play area" message in [[1608: Hoverboard]] that appeared when the player tried to get out of it.
|
The Crystal Sphere may be a reference to {{w|The Crystal Spheres}}, a short story by {{w|science fiction}} author {{w|David Brin}}, which suggests that each star with habitable planets in the universe is surrounded by a crystal sphere that can be broken only from the inside and is otherwise completely impenetrable.

It may also be a reference to {{w|celestial spheres}}, an early concept trying to explain apparent movement of planets and stars.
|-
| '''Star Destroyer'''<br/>''from'' <code>star-destroyer-a</code> ''to'' <code>star-destroyer-i</code>
| (18192, -130000)
| To get here, launch from the crack in the Crystal Sphere.
|
This is a gigantic starship; it could have barely fit within the Crystal Sphere. It is located out of the Sphere, right up from the crack, but it can't be reached without the Hyperdrive. It has many corridors and chambers inside, and a lot of people, objects and other features both inside and outside of it. The gravity of the Sphere is still strong around here, but the starship has its own center of gravity; the "down" direction generally points towards the ventral part of the starship, but not quite, making orientation somewhat difficult as the surfaces supposed to be level seem to tilt to the left near the stern and to the right near the bow of the starship. Below it, down a stream of torpedoes fired from a turret, there's a much smaller starship.
|
This is a reference to {{w|Star Destroyer}}s and the {{w|Tantive IV|CR90 Corellian corvette}}, spaceships from the fictional ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' universe.

The whole scene is copied from [[1608: Hoverboard]], with the only difference being that {{w|Darth Vader}}'s dialogue was changed from referencing {{w|Steven Universe}} to {{w|The Murderbot Diaries}}.
|-
| '''Click and Drag Planet'''<br/><code>clickdrag-nw</code>, <code>clickdrag-ne</code>, <code>clickdrag-sw</code>, ''and'' <code>clickdrag-se</code>
| (-31808, 111808)
| To get here, launch from the bow or stern of the Star Destroyer tangentially to the Crystal Sphere to orbit it and keep the stars in the background moving horizontally on the screen until you see a dot around the spaceship guiding you.
|
The planet is huge, larger than any other in the game world, but smaller than the Star Destroyer. It is located outside the Crystal Sphere roughly opposite the Star Destroyer. It is mostly round, with many landscape features and scenes partly copied from [[1110: Click and Drag]], but arrayed in a circular, instead of linear shape. What's missing in comparison to the Click and Drag comic, is a few of the scenes, some textual content like dialogues (leaving persons intact), the underground parts, upper parts of the very high objects, and objects high above the surface.
|
|}

==Collectables==

===Plain list===
This is a quick list for those who want to check if they found everything.

The ''You found...'' sections directly show the names that appear in the player's list of found items. Some upgrades are also items and appear on the list, in such cases the names are the '''bolded''' parts of messages.

* '''Starting Planet'''
** You found...
**# a rock with neat stripes
**# a cool bug
**# a pretty leaf
** Messages
**# Wheeee!

* '''Origin'''
** You found...
**# a secret glade
**# a holographic Charizard business card
**# a 5G seagull
**# a DVD of The Core (2003)
**# a normal-looking leaf
**# a marsh wren
**# an orb wren
**# a single grain of salt
**# 11 squares packed into a larger square
**# a tumbleweed
** Upgrades
**# Nice flying! (Your tanks recharge faster now.)
** Messages
**# You found a tiny meteorite!
**# Welcome to liminal space
**# The St. Louis arch is also known as the gateway to space.
**# Be careful; this roller coaster can be disorienting!

*'''Hollow Planet'''
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a sixth Lagrange point'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# You found '''a glass of heavy water''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Round Planet'''
** You found...
**# a swatch pop-out wristwatch
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a sensible cheese platter''' (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now)
**# ''[no message]'' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Uzumaki'''
** You found...
**# a golden radio tuned to 1.618 MHz
**# a scroll lock key
**# a primordial black hole
**# a cool pair of shoes with flames on the side
**# an ink cartridge
**# a podcast episode
**# a festive but somehow unnerving holiday card from Junji Ito
**# a friendly bee
**# a spiral-cut diamond
**# a burrito
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a tree-filled grove and a nice spot for quiet contemplation''' (Your thrusters are significantly more efficient now.)
**# You found '''a single caffeine molecule'''! (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
** Messages
**# Exit Only
**# You're going the wrong way!

* '''Guitar Ship'''
** You found...
**# a guitar pick
** Tokens
**# Orange line deactivated!

* '''Spacetime Soccer Field'''
** Upgrades
**# GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''the 3 million point line''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# You found '''a sunspot'''! (Your launch speed has increased.)

* '''Saturn'''
** You found...
**# a really cool data point
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a pair of platonic solids, not quite touching'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a block of scandium'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Andal'''
** Upgrades
**# You found '''two Andalites, one canonical'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# What a nice place for a ship to sit! (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
**# You found '''a friend''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# You found '''baby shoes (and baby)'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Projection of Earth'''
** You found...
**# the Heart of the Ocean (The message adds: "It was drifting around in space.")
**# a whale shark
**# some microbial life
**# some tin from the Pantai Remis mine
**# a sparkling gem
**# a piece of pumice (The message says: "You found a piece of pumice floating in space!")
** Upgrades
**# You found '''the Principality of Sealand'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a Rhode Island the size of an ant'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found an icosahedral d10 (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
** Tokens
**# Red line deactivated!

* '''Voyager 1'''
** Upgrades
**# You found '''Voyager 1'''! Some of its great speed rubs off on you. (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)

* '''Voyager 2'''
** Upgrades
**# You found '''Voyager 2'''! Some of its great speed rubs off on you. (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)

* '''SafetySat'''
** You found...
**# a first of its kind
** Upgrades
**# ''[no message]'' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# The more refined oil had a dinner engagement (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)

* '''Shuttle Skeleton'''
** You found...
**# a piece of space shuttle food
** Upgrades
**# A little upgrade works wonders on fuel efficiency (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)

* '''Giant Spider'''
** You found...
**# a spider-silk scarf
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a friendly jumping spider''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Diffraction Spikes Star'''
** You found...
**# a hydrogen ion
**# a piece of coronium (iron) (The message says; "You found a piece of coronium! Wait, no, iron.")

* '''Roche Lobe Earth'''
** You found...
**# a curious Humboldt squid
**# a bathyscaphe (The message says: "You found a bathyscaphe at the Marianas Trench!")
**# a wayward Roomba full of moondust
** Tokens
**# Green line deactivated!

* '''Dark Matter Planet'''
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a delicate music box'''. (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Jurassic Park Planet'''
** You found...
**# a tiny pteranodon
**# a baby hedgehog
**# a tattered knapsack containing about $194,00 in $20 bills
** Upgrades
**# Today is a good day I think for space exploration (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# But what if gravity doesn't actually exist? (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)

* '''Comet 67P'''
** Upgrades
**# Some people believe that when the Earth appears in the sky, it's a harbinger of doom. (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
**# You found '''a broken smoke machine''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# Anyone for Scrabble later? (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''The Long Now Foundation's''' nickel paperweight containing an '''archive of every''' published '''Animorphs book'''! (Your launch speed has increased.)

* '''What If? Planet'''
** You found...
**# an eye in the sky
**# a stick
**# an asterisk (The message adds: "it doesn’t seem to refer to anything.")
**# a sterile neutrino
**# a secret leaf
**# a pair of squirrel goggles
**# a large hadron
**# a smooth green snake
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a sunken treasure''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# The Yellowstone Super What? (Your launch speed has increased.)
**# Nutritional Facts - Serving Size: 1 Cloud, Total Calories: 0 (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You captured the flag! You decide to leave it there, but it's yours. (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a steam calliope'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a DNA base pair'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)

* '''Subway Planet'''
** You found...
**# a relativistic bowling ball
**# a Cybiko® wireless handheld computer for teens (2000)
**# a handful of quantum foam
**# a normal-sized apple
** Upgrades
**# You get the feeling you're not in Kansas anymore (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
**# There is no parking in the white zone (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# The next stop is Interplanetary Terminal G (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You feel accomplished (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a hot dog''' (Your launch speed has increased.)
**# You found '''a bottle of Coke Absolute Zero!''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# You found '''a beige electron'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''$30 in Yahoo'''! cash! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a friendly cat'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# You found '''a brightly-lit billboard''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
** Messages
**# Transfer here for Mornington Crescent
** Tokens
**# MIT Cloaking Device deactivated! Boston detected. (Blue, red, green, and orange lines activated.)

* '''Boston Planet'''
** You found...
**# a strangely heavy subway token
** Tokens
**# Blue line deactivated!
**# Welcome to MIT! You acquired a hyperdrive!

* '''Crystal Sphere'''
** You found...
**# a necklace of element samples whose symbols spell out your name (The message adds: "(note: hopefully you are not named 'katherine' or 'Brandon')!")
**# the platinum cylinder formerly used to define the kilogram
** Upgrades
**# A significant boost to the engines for a curious pilot (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)
**# You found '''the gold crown Archimedes stole'''! (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)
**# You found a handful of the quantum foam that makes up the fabric of space! (Your tanks recharge much faster now.)

* '''Crack in the Crystal Sphere'''
** Upgrades
**# There is a way out (Your launch speed has increased.)
** Messages
**# Right lane must turn right
**# Left lane must turn left

* '''Star Destroyer'''
** You found...
**# an unread email (The message adds: "Better leave it unread.")
**# a glass slipper with a glass foot in it
**# a lymphocyte
**# a forged resume
**# a serif
**# a Bursa of Fabricius
**# a cluster of data points
**# a premium subscription to food (The message has: "food.net")
**# two goats and a new car
**# an out-of-control trolley
**# a helium-238 nucleus
**# the Death Star plans
** Upgrades
**# You found '''a perpetual motion fidget spinner'''! (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
**# You found '''a vintage Juicero juicer'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
** Messages
**# Hmmm.

* '''Click and Drag Planet'''
** You found...
**# an ant the size of Rhode Island
**# a pin with 17 angels dancing on it
** Upgrades
**# The vehicle below gives you a boost (Your launch speed has increased.)
**# We should turn back (Your engine gets a bit more powerful.)
**# You found '''an expert at underwater ropes'''. (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
**# You found '''a trisected angle'''! (Your launch speed has greatly increased.)

* '''Open Space Outside the Crystal Sphere'''
** Upgrades
**# It is very lonely out here (Your tanks recharge much faster now.)
**# You found '''a needle in a haystack''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
**# From here you can view the source of it all. (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)

===Table===

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! rowspan="2"|Planet
! colspan="4"|Collectable items
|-
! You found...
! Upgrades
! Messages
! Subway tokens
|-
| '''Starting Planet'''
|
* a rock with neat stripes
* a cool bug
* a pretty leaf
|
|
* Wheeee!
|
|-
| '''Origin'''
|
* a secret glade
* a holographic Charizard business card
* a 5G seagull
* a DVD of The Core (2003)
* a normal-looking leaf
* a marsh wren
* an orb wren
* a single grain of salt
* 11 squares packed into a larger square
* a tumbleweed
|
* Nice flying! (Your tanks recharge faster now.)
|
* You found a tiny meteorite!
* Welcome to liminal space
* The St. Louis arch is also known as the gateway to space.
* Be careful; this roller coaster can be disorienting!
|
|-
| '''Hollow Planet'''
|
|
* You found '''a sixth Lagrange point'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* You found '''a glass of heavy water''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Round Planet'''
|
* a swatch pop-out wristwatch
|
* You found '''a sensible cheese platter''' (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now)
* ''[no message]'' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Uzumaki'''
|
* a golden radio tuned to 1.618 MHz
* a scroll lock key
* a primordial black hole
* a cool pair of shoes with flames on the side
* an ink cartridge
* a podcast episode
* a festive but somehow unnerving holiday card from Junji Ito
* a friendly bee
* a spiral-cut diamond
* a burrito
|
* You found '''a tree-filled grove and a nice spot for quiet contemplation''' (Your thrusters are significantly more efficient now.)
* You found '''a single caffeine molecule'''! (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
|
* Exit Only
* You're going the wrong way!
|
|-
| '''Guitar Ship'''
|
* a guitar pick
|
|
|
* Orange line deactivated!
|-
| '''Spacetime Soccer Field'''
|
|
* GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''the 3 million point line''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* You found '''a sunspot'''! (Your launch speed has increased.)
|
|
|-
| '''Saturn'''
|
* a really cool data point
|
* You found '''a pair of platonic solids, not quite touching'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''a block of scandium'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Andal'''
|
|
* You found '''two Andalites, one canonical'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* What a nice place for a ship to sit! (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
* You found '''a friend''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* You found '''baby shoes (and baby''')! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Projection of Earth'''
|
* the Heart of the Ocean
* a whale shark
* some microbial life
* some tin from the Pantai Remis mine
* a sparkling gem
* a piece of pumice
|
* You found '''the Principality of Sealand'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''a Rhode Island the size of an ant'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found an icosahedral d10 (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
* Red line deactivated!
|-
| '''Voyager 1'''
|
|
* You found '''Voyager 1'''! Some of its great speed rubs off on you. (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)
|
|
|-
| '''Voyager 2'''
|
|
* You found '''Voyager 2'''! Some of its great speed rubs off on you. (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)
|
|
|-
| '''SafetySat'''
|
* a first of its kind
|
* ''[no message]'' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* The more refined oil had a dinner engagement (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
|
|
|-
| '''Shuttle Skeleton'''
|
* a piece of space shuttle food
|
* A little upgrade works wonders on fuel efficiency (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
|
|
|-
| '''Giant Spider'''
|
* a spider-silk scarf
|
* You found '''a friendly jumping spider''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Diffraction Spikes Star'''
|
* a hydrogen ion
* a piece of coronium (iron)
|
|
|
|-
| '''Roche Lobe Earth'''
|
* a curious Humboldt squid
* a bathyscaphe
* a wayward Roomba full of moondust
|
|
|
* Green line deactivated!
|-
| '''Dark Matter Planet'''
|
|
* You found '''a delicate music box'''. (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Jurassic Park Planet'''
|
* a tiny pteranodon
* a baby hedgehog
* a tattered knapsack containing about $194,00 in $20 bills
|
* Today is a good day I think for space exploration (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* But what if gravity doesn't actually exist? (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
|
|
|-
| '''Comet 67P'''
|
|
* Some people believe that when the Earth appears in the sky, it's a harbinger of doom. (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
* You found '''a broken smoke machine''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* Anyone for Scrabble later? (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''The Long Now Foundation's''' nickel paperweight containing an '''archive of every''' published '''Animorphs book'''! (Your launch speed has increased.)
|
|
|-
| '''What If? Planet'''
|
* an eye in the sky
* a stick
* an asterisk
* a sterile neutrino
* a secret leaf
* a pair of squirrel goggles
* a large hadron
* a smooth green snake
|
* You found '''a sunken treasure''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* The Yellowstone Super What? (Your launch speed has increased.)
* Nutritional Facts - Serving Size: 1 Cloud, Total Calories: 0 (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You captured the flag! You decide to leave it there, but it's yours. (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''a steam calliope'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''a DNA base pair'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Subway Planet'''
|
* a relativistic bowling ball
* a Cybiko® wireless handheld computer for teens (2000)
* a handful of quantum foam
* a normal-sized apple
|
* You get the feeling you're not in Kansas anymore (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
* There is no parking in the white zone (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* The next stop is Interplanetary Terminal G (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You feel accomplished (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''a brightly-lit billboard''' (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* You found '''a hot dog''' (Your launch speed has increased.)
* You found '''a bottle of Coke Absolute Zero'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* You found '''a beige electron'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''$30 in Yahoo'''! cash! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* You found '''a friendly cat'''! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
* Transfer here for Mornington Crescent
|
* MIT Cloaking Device deactivated! Boston detected. (Blue, red, green, and orange lines activated.)
|-
| '''Boston Planet'''
|
* a strangely heavy subway token
|
|
|
* Blue line deactivated!
* Welcome to MIT! You acquired a hyperdrive!
|-
| '''Crystal Sphere'''
|
* a necklace of element samples whose symbols spell out your name
* the platinum cylinder formerly used to define the kilogram
|
* A significant boost to the engines for a curious pilot (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)
* You found '''the gold crown Archimedes stole'''! (Your engine thrust has increased significantly.)
* You found a handful of the quantum foam that makes up the fabric of space! (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
|
|
|-
| '''Crack in the Crystal Sphere'''
|
|
* There is a way out (Your launch speed has increased.)
|
* Right lane must turn right
* Left lane must turn left
|
|-
| '''Star Destroyer'''
|
* an unread email
* a glass slipper with a glass foot in it
* a lymphocyte
* a forged resume
* a serif
* a Bursa of Fabricius
* a cluster of data points
* a premium subscription to food
* two goats and a new car
* an out-of-control trolley
* a helium-238 nucleus
* the Death Star plans
|
* You found '''a perpetual motion fidget spinner'''! (Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.)
* You found '''a vintage Juicero juicer'''! (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
|
* Hmmm.
|
|-
| '''Click and Drag Planet'''
|
* an ant the size of Rhode Island
* a pin with 17 angels dancing on it
|
* The vehicle below gives you a boost (Your launch speed has increased.)
* We should turn back (Your engine gets a bit more powerful.)
* You found '''an expert at underwater ropes'''. (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
* You found '''a trisected angle'''! (Your launch speed has greatly increased.)
|
|
|-
| '''Open Space Outside the Crystal Sphere'''
|
|
* It is very lonely out here (Your tanks recharge much faster now.)
* You found '''a needle in a haystack''' (Your engine gets a little more powerful.)
* From here you can view the source of it all. (Your thrusters are more efficient now.)
|
|}

==Objects==

{| class="wikitable sortable"
! colspan="5"|Features and Items
|-
! Planet
! Type
! Location
! Description / Message
! Explanation
|-
| rowspan="5" valign="top"|'''Starting Planet'''
| Message
| Above starting position
| ''Wheeee!''
| Probably reflects the excitation of a new visitor to this XKCD comic, seeing a promising game.
|-
| Item
| Above ground left of the starting position
| a rock with neat stripes
|
|-
| Item
| In the grass right of the starting position
| a cool bug
| A reference to 'Cool Bug Epoch' from [[2240: Timeline of the Universe]]
|-
| Item
| Up a tree
| a pretty leaf
|
|-
| People
| On the opposite of the starting position
| Beret Guy pointing his arm up and exclaiming ''WOW!''
| This is a reference to the title text of [[1117: My Sky]], and it could also be a reference to [[502: Dark Flow]].

|-
| rowspan="41" valign="top"| '''Origin'''
| Landscape
| Close to the Starting Planet
| A sign saying: ''Welcome to Origin! You can never leave™''
| The sign names the planet, and also indicates that it is not possible to leave it by just launching off the surface during early gameplay, when the player has not collected any upgrades. May be a reference to the song by The Eagles: "Hotel California".
|-
| Message
| Right of the welcome sign, above the rollercoaster
| ''Be careful; this roller coaster can be disorienting!''
| A hint for the hidden shaft going through the planet; one of the entries is right below here.
|-
| Landscape
| On the right side of the rollercoaster
| A sign saying: ''Caution: Long vertical drop''
| Another hint for the hidden shaft.
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the rollercoaster
| A spider-shaped monument
| Marks the direction to the Giant Spider planet
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the spider monument
| A radio telescope with its antenna pointed straight up. ''Receiving transmission''.
| Marks the direction to Voyager 2. The message is an additional hint as radio telescopes are often used to communicate with distant space probes, including receiving probes' measurements and other scientific data, like photos.
|-
| People
| Right next to the cell tower
|
Cueball and White Hat talking.
:'''Cueball''': I bet the voyager spacecraft could teach you a thing or two about speed. Of course, you'd have to catch up to them first...
|
Voyager spacecraft are {{w|List_of_vehicle_speed_records#Spacecraft|not among}} the speed record holding space probes as of 2023, however they are the first in history to reach Solar System's {{w|escape velocity}}. They have also executed two {{w|gravity assist}} maneuvers each, so they are good examples on how to increase speed in this way, presumably allowing them to "teach" another spacecraft how to increase speed. Cueball's metaphor goes on to having to meet (catch up with) someone in order to learn something from him. The Voyagers are currently the farthest man-made objects in space; however in the game world they are quite close to the Origin planet.

This is also a hint regarding the upgrades located near both Voyager spacecraft, which add more thrust to the player's ship than regular thrust upgrades.
|-
| Landscape
| To the right from the radio telescope located near the spider monument
| A cell tower with 5G antennas. On top of it a strange object is mounted.
|
The strange object is a downscaled image of cube satellite from [[1992: SafetySat]]. Normally nobody puts cube satellites on top of fixed towers.

This landmark shows the direction to the SafetySat "planet".
|-
| Item
| Next to the top of the cell tower
| a 5G seagull
| {{w|5G}} is a modern emerging standard for {{w|cellular networks}} promising really high download speeds and much higher network capacity (i.e. the number of active devices in an area). Probably a reference to [[1656: It Begins]]
|-
| Landscape
| To the right from the cell tower
| A tyrannosaurus
| Marks the direction to the Jurassic Park planet.
|-
| Landscape
| Right next to the tyrannosaurus
| A St. Louis Arch shaped hole in the ground
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the left of the three pyramids
| A monument shaped like a sphere with a "T" on top
| This is a miniature of the Andal planet and marks the direction to it.
|-
| Landscape
| The leftmost of three pyramids
| A pyramid with a soccer ball on top
| Marks the direction to the Spacetime Soccer Field.
|-
| People
| The middle pyramid
|
Ponytail sitting on top of a pyramid, Megan standing at the base of it.
:'''Ponytail''': If you want a better spaceship, you need to visit another planet.
:'''Megan''': But if I want to visit another planet, I need a better spaceship!
|
An in-game reference to the fact that the player's ship initially has too little thrust to launch right off the surface of the Origin planet and needs an upgrade to become a "better" spaceship able to visit other planets. On the other hand, all engine upgrades are located off Origin, creating the apparently unsolvable {{w|Chicken or the egg|chicken-and-egg problem}} – unless the player follows other hints and finds a way to escape Origin anyway.
|-
| Landscape
| The rightmost of three pyramids
| A pyramid with Saturn on top of it
| Marks the direction to Saturn.
|-
| People
| Next to the pyramid with Saturn on top
|
Cueball and White Hat talking.
:'''Cueball''': I can't believe the Air and Space Museum's new exhibit has a real black hole!
:'''White Hat''': Is that... safe?
:'''Cueball''': It's OK, they've got a protective case around it.
|
Normally, it would not be possible to have a real black hole as a museum exhibit.{{citation needed}} Also, there's a misunderstanding between White Hat and Cueball. White Hat asks if it is safe for the public to keep a black hole in a museum. Cueball thinks White Hat is concerned about safety of the black hole itself, and responds that it is protected from unscrupulous visitors by putting it in a special case.

This is an in-game hint regarding the Subway Planet and the black hole present in its tunnels. It's also a reference to the real-world {{w|Intrepid Sea, Air & Space Museum|''Intrepid'' Sea, Air & Space Museum}}.
|-
| Landscape
| To the right from the pyramids
| A monument shaped like Earth's land masses
| Marks the direction to the Projection of Earth.
|-
| People
| Right next to the Projection of Earth monument
|
:'''Hairy''': Even if you did find a crack in the crystal sphere, there's no way you'd be able to escape its gravitational pull. You'd need some kind of a hyperdrive for that.
| An in-game reference to the Crystal Sphere, the navigable crack through it and the hint regarding the hyperdrive.
|-
| Landscape
| On the left side of the St. Louis Arch
| A monument of a strange spaceship
| This is a reference to [[2630: Shuttle Skeleton]] and marks the direction to the Shuttle Skeleton planet.
|-
| Landscape
| Opposite the rollercoaster
| A large arch
| This is a reference to the {{w|Gateway Arch}} located in {{w|St. Louis}}, {{w|Missouri}}. Marks the other end of the shaft going through the planet core.
|-
| Message
| A sign next to St. Louis Arch's right leg
| ''The St. Louis arch is also known as the gateway to space.''
| The creator of the Arch, Finnish-American architect {{w|Eero Saarinen}}, reportedly said that the arch symbolizes "the gateway to the West" understood as the {{w|American frontier}} and the expansion of American colonies into the western parts of the continent.

In-game, the Arch marks one of the "gateways" into the larger space of the game, namely the exits of the inner shaft, which allows the player to leave Origin by performing the Oberth maneuver (see below for further explanation).
|-
| Upgrade
| High above the St. Louis Arch
| ''Nice flying! Your tanks recharge faster now.''
| Congratulations for getting your orbital mechanics right and skillfully executing Oberth maneuver (see below).
|-
| People
| Right next to the St. Louis Arch
|
Ponytail with a group of three kids looking like Hairy, Megan and Cueball.
:'''Ponytail''': The St. Louis Arch is also known as the gateway to space.
| Ponytail acting as a guide repeats (or reads) to the kids the slogan written on the sign next to the Arch. See above for the explanation of the slogan.
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the St. Louis Arch
| A monument with a pear-shaped structure connected to a small sphere
| It's a miniature of the Roche Lobe Earth, marking a direction to it.
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the St. Louis Arch
| A small structure and a tower with a strange-looking orb on top
| Marks the direction to the Round Planet.
|-
| Item
| Close to the top of the orb tower.
| an orb wren
| {{w|Wren}}s are a common family of birds. Their bodies are rather stocky with short wings, sometimes resembling an orb, especially when perched with ruffled feathers such as when enduring cold weather. There's no species actually called an "orb wren".
|-
| Item
| Hidden at the base of the orb tower.
| 11 squares packed into a larger square
| A reference to [[2740: Square Packing]].
|-
| People
| To the right of the orb tower
|
Hairbun and another person.
:'''Hairbun''': Boston? That's in North America, on the Subway planet. It's straight up from the secret glade, you can't miss it.
|
This is an in-game reference and a hint on how to find Boston and the Subway Planet
|-
| Item
| Hidden in a grassy area to the right of the orb tower
| a tumbleweed
| {{w|Tumbleweed}} is an above-ground part of some species of plants in a form of a round, dense bush, which detaches as the plant dries in the summer season and is pushed by winds, rolling along the landscape.
|-
| Item
| Over a grassy area to the right of the orb tower
| a marsh wren
| {{w|Marsh wren}} is a species of North American songbird.
|-
| People
| To the right from the grassy area
|
A quintet of hairy and bearded or moustached people playing and singing:
:It's more than a feeling
:More than a feeling
| This is a reference to the popular song ''{{w|More Than a Feeling}}'' by the {{w|Boston_(band)|Boston}} rock band. It is also an in-game reference and pun regarding multiple Bostons present.
|-
| Message
| Above ground to the right of the musical band
| ''You found a tiny meteorite!''
| {{w|Meteorite}}s are fragments of small celestial bodies that have fallen onto the surface of Earth, surviving a high-speed passage through the atmosphere. Some are really tiny, being a result of a fragmentation of a larger one caused by the forces exerted during atmospherical entry. This particular one has not quite reached the surface, and should be called a {{w|meteoroid}} or a {{w|Meteoroid#Meteors|meteor}} instead.
|-
| Item
| High above ground to the right of the musical band
| a single grain of salt
|
|-
| Landscape
| Between the grassy area and the forest left of the welcome sign
| A spiral-shaped monument
| Marks the direction to the spiral Uzumaki planet.
|-
| Landscape
| Between the grassy area and the forest left of the welcome sign
| A radio telescope with its antenna pointed straight up. ''Receiving transmission''.
| Marks the direction to the Voyager 1. See also the entry on Voyager 2 above.
|-
| People
| Next to the voyager 1 radio telescope.
|
Cueball and Megan.
:'''Megan''': It's like my astronomy teacher always said: "Shoot for the Moon -- even if you miss, you might make a crack in the crystal sphere that imprisons us all in this universe."
| This is an in-game reference to the crack in the crystal sphere of the universe. If you go straight up from them, you can find the crack pretty easily.
|-
| Item
| At the left edge of the forest to the left from the welcome sign
| a holographic Charizard business card
|
This is a reference to a particular {{w|Charizard|character}} from the {{w|Pokémon}} media franchise. {{w|Holography|Holographic}} {{w|business card}}s are a fairly novel form of business or personal presentation.
|-
| Item
| In the middle of the forest to the left from the welcome sign
| a secret glade
|
|-
| Item
| Up the widest tree in the forest to the left from the welcome sign
| a normal-looking leaf
|
|-
| Message
| In the exact middle of the planet
| ''Welcome to liminal space''
|
|-
| People
| In a chamber next to the planet's center
|
Megan with her hair floating around her head.
:'''Megan''': The Oberth effect states that firing thrusters deeper in a gravity well adds more kinetic energy.
|
The {{w|Oberth effect}} is a physical phenomenon and orbital maneuver when a spacecraft fires its thrusters as close to the perycenter (the point on the orbit closest to the center of the orbited body) as possible, being deeper in the "gravity well", to gain more kinetic energy than if the same impulse (amount of propellant used and therefore speed difference) has been applied away from the center, in effect using its propellant more effectively. The kinetic energy is what allows a spacecraft to leave the proximity of the orbited body. A special case of such a maneuver may be accelerating in a theoretical shaft going through the core of the body, which is the case simulated in the game. Applying the principle according to Megan's hint the player is able to "swing" the spaceship a few times along the shaft, accelerating close to the center and allowing the "energy" to regenerate while away, and leave Origin in spite off low initial thrust.

The fact that inside of a spherical body the gravity of the outer layers cancels out creates a local microgravity environment, causing Megan's hair to freely float around her head.
|-
| Item
| In a chamber next to the planet's center
| a DVD of The Core (2003)
| A {{w|DVD}} is a digital {{w|optical disc}} format used most commonly for distributing {{w|film}}s, in his case the 2003 American {{w|The Core|science fiction disaster film}}. As the title suggest, it is inconveniently located at the core of the Origin planet.

|-
| rowspan="8" valign="top"| '''Hollow Planet'''
|People
| In the hollow center of the planet.
|
Ponytail and White Hat floating in microgravity. White Hat's hat has come off his head.
:'''White Hat''': It's weird how a hollow shell doesn't exert gravitational force on objects inside it.
:'''Ponytail''': Oh, so ''that's'' why we don't feel a pull from the crystal sphere.
|
White Hat experiences a practical application of an unintuitive, and since "weird" in his words, {{w|shell theorem}}, as applied to gravity: that inside a hollow, spherical shell the forces of the gravity exerted by the shell cancel out for every object inside, regardless of its position within. Ponytail gets an epiphany, that it also applies to the gigantic Crystal Sphere surrounding the most part of the world she is in.
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Close to the center of the planet.
|
a sixth lagrange point

''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
{{w|Lagrange point}}s are places relative to two heavy bodies orbiting one another, where a third, much lighter body will stay in equilibrium with the large two, orbiting the common center of gravity with the same period and keeping a constant distance from both. There are only five Lagrange points.

In theory, a small body located in the center of a hollowed-out massive body will stay put as well (see the previous explanation), creating the sixth Lagrange point; however a hollow massive body can't exist, it will collapse under its own gravity.
|-
| Landscape
| On the surface of the planet.
| A sign with upwards-pointing arrow saying: ''Round Planet''
| Marks the direction to the Round Planet.
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Over the surface to the right of the ''Round Planet'' sign
|
a glass of heavy water

''Your engine gets a bit more powerful.''
|
{{w|Heavy water}} is a form of water that contains only {{w|deuterium}} (hydrogen-2) atoms in place of the much more common {{w|Hydrogen|hydrogen-1}} atoms. It is approximately 10% {{w|Density|denser}} than the regular water, hence its name. Heavy water is not normally poured into glasses as for drinking.
|-
| Landscape
| On the surface of the planet to the right of the ''Round Planet'' sign
| A sign with upwards-pointing arrow saying: ''EXIT''
| Marks the direction to the crack in the Crystal Sphere.
|-
| Landscape
| Next to the ''EXIT'' sign
| A sign with upwards-pointing arrow saying: ''Uzumaki''
| Marks the direction to Uzumaki
|-
| Landscape
| Across a gap in the surface to the right of the ''Uzumaki'' sign
| A sign with upwards-pointing arrow saying: ''Origin and Subway''
| Marks the direction to Origin and (not quite precisely) to the Subway Planet.
|-
| Landscape
| On the surface opposite the ''EXIT'' sign
| A sign with upwards-pointing arrow saying: ''Earth (compromise projection)''
| Marks the direction to Projection of Earth.

|-
| rowspan="10" valign="top" | '''Round Planet'''
| People
| On the middle part of the Great Wall
|
Cueball and Megan.
:'''Cueball''': The Great Wall of China is the only human-made structure you can see space from.
|
This is a pun on the commonly voiced misconception that the {{w|Great Wall of China}} is the only man-made object on Earth that can be seen from {{w|Outer space|space}} (or the Earth's orbit at least).
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| To the right of the Great Wall over a field of boulders
|
a sensible cheese platter

''Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
A cheese platter is a common dish served in restaurants as a starter or sometimes as a main dish, as well as a final course in a formal meal (following the sweet, or as an option instead of one) composed of a selection of cheeses served on a large platter. However, often it may just be a random collection of what's available (e.g. a hard cheese, a soft cheese, a blue cheese of either hard or soft variety, possibly a small serving of butter; and a selection of crackers that are either far too many or far too few for the other products). A "sensible" plate, i.e. well-composed by a competent chef, might be considered rare.
|-
| Item
| Within Stonehenge
| a swatch pop-out wristwatch
|
|-
| People
| To the right of the Stonehenge
| Hairbun walking on absurdly high stilts
| People walking on stilts are a fairly common theme in xkcd. References include [[482: Height]], [[1608: Hoverboard]], [[1663: Garden]], [[2603: Childhood Toys]], [[2669: Things You Should Not Do]] and possibly other comics.
|-
| Landscape
| Next to Hairbun on stilts
|
Three spaceships flying just above the surface. The leading one transmits a message:
:''Rogue group, use your harpoons and tow cables! Go for the legs!''
|
This is a quote from ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' episode V ''{{w|The Empire Strikes Back}}''. In the original context the starships were attacking {{w|Walker (Star Wars)#All Terrain Armored Transport (AT-AT)|AT-AT}} four-legged armored vehicles, trying to immobilize them by entangling their legs. In the game, they are attacking Hairbun on stilts instead.
|-
| Upgrade
| Above the middle spaceship attacking Hairbun
| ''Your engine gets a bit more powerful.''
| A regular engine upgrade.
|-
| People
| To the right of the three spaceships
| A volleyball net. Cueball is jumping in the air to hit a volleyball on the right side of the net while Ponytail is juggling three bowling pins on the left side.
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the volleyball field
|
An airplane towing a long, narrow banner with a message printed across, not along it:
:''Does any one know how to get this thing to print in land scape mode?''
| A reference to [[2757: Towed Message]].
|-
| People
| To the right of the airplane towing a banner
| Beret Guy climbing a cell tower with some fruit hanging off the antennas. Cueball is standing next to it.
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the cell tower
| Huge gallows with a large flag on a pole hanging on it. The pole of the flag is twisted into a shape partly resembling an infinity sign; the loose end of the pole pierces the flag. A relatively large Cueball figure stands next to it.
|

|-
| rowspan="16" valign="top" | '''Uzumaki'''
| Item + Upgrade
| On the outside of the spiral
| a single caffeine molecule
''Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
{{w|Caffeine}} is a chemical substance present in many plants including {{w|coffee bean}}s. Beverages containing it have a refreshing effect on people, reducing fatigue and increasing performance. It may be pun implying that after collecting this item, the spaceship is similarly "recharged" as a person after a cup of {{w|coffee}}, however a single {{w|molecule}} would not make a big difference.
|-
| Message
| The entrance to the spiral
| ''Exit Only''
| In real world doors or gates are sometimes marked ''Exit Only'' to facilitate optimal movement of people or vehicles in an area or within a building, especially in an emergency. However, for such one-way passage to be useful, the structure must have some other entry points. The spiral has only one entry point.
|-
| Item
| Within the spiral
| a festive but somehow unnerving holiday card from Junji Ito
| {{w|Junji Ito}} is the author of {{w|Uzumaki}}, which inspired the spiral planet. He specializes in {{w|Japanese horror}} genre, therefore a postcard with his original artwork on it might be perceived as "unnerving".
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a podcast episode
| A {{w|podcast}} is a primarily a {{w|digital audio}} (now more commonly also a {{w|video}}) show or presentation similar to a {{w|radio program}}, but instead of being {{w|Broadcasting|broadcast}} at a predetermined time, is made available for {{w|download}} and later review at leisure. Being digital data, a podcast is intangible, therefore finding a podcast episode just lying around is a bit absurd missing some recording medium. On the other hand a digital video found on the Origin planet is recorded on a DVD (see above).
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a friendly bee
|
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| an ink cartridge
| An ink cartridge is a container filled with {{w|ink}}, packaged for direct use in a device that dispenses the ink for drawing, writing, printing etc. It may refer to a cartridge for an old-fashioned {{w|fountain pen}} or an {{w|ink cartridge}} for a modern {{w|Inkjet printing|inkjet printer}}.
|-
| Landscape
| Further within the spiral
|
A free-roaming Roomba

:'''Roomba''': WHIRRR
| {{w|Roomba}} is a line of {{w|robotic vacuum cleaner}}s popular in the {{w|hacker culture|hacker community}}. Roombas are a [[:Category:Roomba|common theme]] on xkcd, but this is likely a direct reference to [[1558: Vet]].
|-
| Message
| Just above Roomba
| ''You're going the wrong way!' ''
| Probably a reference to the ''Exit Only'' message above.
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a spiral-cut diamond
| Raw {{w|diamond}}s are {{w|Diamond cut|cut}} to form {{w|Gemstone|gems}} used in {{w|jewellery}}. To expose the natural beauty of the mineral, the cut has to create symmetrical flat surfaces (facets) at specific angles to each other so {{w|White#White_light|white light}} {{w|refraction|refracts}} and {{w|Reflection (physics)|reflects}} within the finished gem, possibly multiple times, also {{w|Dispersion (optics)|dipersing}} on its way back to the viewer's eye, creating a brilliant look. Cutting a diamond in a spiral shape would be likely counter-productive and very difficult because of the material's {{w|brittleness}}.

It is a self-reference to the spiral "planet" the item is located on.
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a golden radio tuned to 1.618 MHz
|
A {{w|Broadcasting|broadcast}} {{w|radio receiver}} (often called simply ''radio'') is an electronic device for receiving and listening to {{w|radio program|radio programming}} and has to be {{w|Tuner (radio)|tuned}} to a particular {{w|frequency}} to listen to the desired program. Frequency is measured in the unit of {{w|hertz}} or its {{w|Metric prefix|multiplies}}, in this example in megahertz. 1.618 MHz is located in the part of {{w|High frequency|HF}} (high frequency) range of the {{w|electromagnetic spectrum}} assigned (in the USA {{w|Frequency plan|band plan}}) to broadcasting, however not aligned to actual station assignments; the closest assignment is 1.620 MHz (1620 kHz) for {{w|WDHP}} station in {{w|Frederiksted, U.S. Virgin Islands}}. Due to inaccuracies involved with tuning and the 10 kHz {{w|channel spacing}} of American {{w|AM broadcasting|AM radio broadcasting}}, setting a real radio receiver to exactly 1618 kHz will allow listening to the mentioned station, as well as a few others which have nearby frequencies allocated, maybe with some distortion.

This is a pun referring to the {{w|golden ratio}}, being an {{w|irrational number}} of approximately 1.618 and to the {{w|golden spiral}}.
|-
| People
| Further within the spiral
|
:'''Beret Guy''': I like spirals!
|
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a burrito
| {{w|Burrito}} is a {{w|Mexican cuisine|Mexican}} and {{w|Tex-Mex}} cuisine dish consisting of various ingredients tightly wrapped in a {{w|flour tortilla|wheat tortilla}}. This is a rather nonsense joke; a possible connection to Uzumaki is that wrapping the tortilla creates a spiral cross section.
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a cool pair of shoes with flames on the side
|
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a scroll lock key
|
{{w|Scroll Lock}} is a key on {{w|IBM Personal Computer|IBM}}-compatible {{w|computer keyboard}}s, often accompanied with a status light. It was originally intended for changing the function of {{w|arrow keys}} between moving the {{w|Cursor (user interface)|cursor}} around the screen (Scroll Lock off) and {{w|scrolling}} the contents of the screen (Scroll Lock on). Later, different systems and applications repurposed the key for other functions, such as pausing and resuming automatic scrolling of copious textual output, or for other obscure purposes such as {{w|debugging}} or the ''{{w|Magic SysRq key}}'' on {{w|Linux}}. As such, the key has almost fallen out of use in modern computing, prompting manufacturers of small computers such as {{w|laptop}}s or small {{w|Form factor (design)|form factor}} keyboards to make it smaller, move it to a non-standard place in the {{w|keyboard layout}} or drop it altogether. Most laptops missing the Scroll Lock key on their keyboards implement some key combination which acts as if Scroll Lock was pressed, allowing advanced users to use the mentioned obscure functions anyway.

Placing this item quite deep in the spiral is a pun referring to difficulty in finding a Scroll Lock key or the equivalent combination on some modern computers. A few xkcd comics refer to the key: [[978: Citogenesis]], [[1465: xkcd Phone 2]], [[1854: Refresh Types]] and [[2206: Mavis Beacon]].
|-
| Item
| Further within the spiral
| a primordial black hole
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the center of the spiral
| a tree-filled grove and a nice spot for quiet contemplation
''Your thrusters are significantly more efficient now.''
|

|-
| rowspan="2" valign="top" | '''Guitar Ship'''
| Item
| Just over the dome on the back of the guitar
| a guitar pick
| A {{w|guitar pick}} is a small flat tool for playing a {{w|guitar}}.
|-
| Token
| Close to guitar's neck
| ''Orange line deactivated!''
|

|-
| rowspan="4" valign="top" | '''Spacetime Soccer Field'''
| Upgrade
| Within one of the goals
| ''GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Within the other goal
| ''GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! Your engine gets a bit more powerful.''
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| On the surface of the planet between goals
| a sunspot
''Your launch speed has increased.''
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| At the center spot on one of the soccer field
| the 3 million point line
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|

|-
| rowspan="3" valign="top" | '''Saturn'''
| Item
| At the equator, below the rings
| a really cool data point
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| At the south pole
| a block of scandium
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| At middle latitudes of the northern hemisphere
| a pair of platonic solids, not quite touching
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|

|-
| rowspan="6" valign="top" | '''Andal'''
| Upgrade
| At the top of the T-shaped tower
| ''What a nice place for a ship to sit! Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the T-shaped tower
| Two fantasy animals: one looks like a centaur, the other as a horse-headed centaur.
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Over the animals
| two Andalites, one canonical
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the grass close to some hills
| baby shoes (and baby)
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| In the grassy area between two hilly regions
|
Cueball and Megan facing each other
:'''Megan''': The M.I.T. cloaking device only affects the electroweak and nuclear forces. Gravity is the odd one out, as usual.
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Next to Megan
| a friend
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|

|-
| rowspan="10" valign="top" | '''Projection of Earth'''
| Item + Upgrade
| The North Sea
| the Principality of Sealand
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Item
| Northern Atlantic Ocean
| the Heart of the Ocean
| The whole message says: ''You found the Heart of the Ocean! It was drifting around in space.''
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Next to Rhode Island
| a Rhode Island the size of an ant
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Token
| Next to Boston, Massachusetts
| ''Red line deactivated!''
|
|-
| Item
| By the Alexander Island of Antarctica
| some microbial life
|
|-
| Item
| Off the West African coastline
| a whale shark
|
|-
| Item
| On the western coast of Myanmar near the Strait of Malacca
| some tin from the pantai remis mine
|
|-
| Item
| Next to the Celebes Island of Indonesia
| a sparkling gem
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Off the southern Australian coast
| an icosahedral d10
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Item
| Near the Kamchatka peninsula in Eastern Russia
| a piece of pumice
| The whole message says: ''You found a piece of pumice floating in space!''

|-
| valign="top" | '''Voyager 1'''
| Item + Upgrade
| Next to the dish antenna
| Voyager 1
''Some of its great speed rubs off on you. Your engine thrust has increased significantly.''
|

|-
| valign="top" | '''Voyager 2'''
| Item + Upgrade
| Next to the dish antenna
| Voyager 2
''Some of its great speed rubs off on you. Your engine thrust has increased significantly.''
|

|-
| rowspan="3" valign="top" | '''SafetySat'''
| Item
| In front of laser pointers
| a first of its kind
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Next to software-defined radio
| ''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Next to crude oil tank
| ''The more refined oil had a dinner engagement. Your launch speed has increased.''
|

|-
| rowspan="2" valign="top" | '''Shuttle Skeleton'''
| Item
| At the tip of the ship's bow
| a piece of space shuttle food
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Next to the left-hand engine
| ''A little upgrade works wonders on fuel efficiency. Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|

|-
| rowspan="2" valign="top" | '''Giant Spider'''
| Item
| Next to the tip of the spider's abdomen
| a spider-silk scarf
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Next to the spider's mouth
| a friendly jumping spider
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|

|-
| rowspan="2" valign="top" | '''Diffraction Spikes Star'''
| Item
| At the tip of a long spike
| a hydrogen ion
|
|-
| Item
| At the tip of a short spike
| a piece of coronium (iron)
| The whole message says: ''You found a piece of coronium! Wait, no, iron.''

|-
| rowspan="4" valign="top" | '''Roche Lobe Earth'''
| Item
| Off the California coastline
| a curious humboldt squid
|
|-
| Item
| Off the Japan coast
| a bathyscaphe
| The whole message says: ''You found a bathyscaphe at the Marianas Trench!''
|-
| Token
| Near Boston
| ''Green line deactivated!''
|
|-
| Item
| On the far side of the Moon
| a wayward Roomba full of moondust
|

|-
| valign="top" | '''Dark Matter Planet'''
| Item + Upgrade
| A little above the surface to the left of Ponytail
| a delicate music box
''Your engine is a little more powerful now.''
|

|-
| rowspan="6" valign="top" | '''Jurassic Park Planet'''
| People
| On the surface
| A person with a hat facing a couple
:'''dr John Hammond''': Welcome... to Jurassic Park.
|
|-
| Upgrade
| To the right of the people close to a dinosaur's mouth
| ''But what if gravity doesn't actually exist? Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Further to the right between two dinosaurs
| ''Today is a good day I think for space exploration. Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Item
| Still further to the right
| a tiny pteranodon
|
|-
| Item
| Still further to the right, low above the grass
| a baby hedgehog
|
|-
| Item
| Below surface down from the middle of empty grassy area between two dinosaurs to the left of the people
| a tattered knapsack containing about $194,00 in $20 bills
|

|-
| rowspan="7" valign="top" | '''Comet 67P'''
| Landscape
| On the surface opposite the large bulge
| Remains of a crashed spacecraft
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Just above the crashed spacecraft
| The Long Now Foundation's archive of every Animorphs book
''You found The Long Now Foundation's nickel paperweight containing an archive of every published Animorphs book! Your launch speed has increased.'
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the left of the bulge
| A small three-legged spacecraft.
:'''Spacecraft''': BEEP BOOP
|
|-
| Landscape
| On the bulge
| Cueball standing next to some apparatus
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Next to the apparatus
| a broken smoke machine
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| To the right of the bulge
| ''Some people believe that when the Earth appears in the sky, it's a harbinger of doom. Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Further to the right, next to a signpost
| ''Anyone for Scrabble later? Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|

|-
| rowspan="36" valign="top" | '''What If? Planet'''
| Upgrade
| On the flag flying from a flagpole
| ''You captured the flag! You decide to leave it there, but it's yours. Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| To the right from the flagpole
| A cave in the ground. Inside it there's Beret Guy and two rabbits.
|
This is a reference to an English-language expression [[wikt:rabbit hole|''rabbit hole'']] which means a complex, bizarre or difficult situation, esp. such that one does
not want to be involved in. The expression is itself a reference to {{w|Lewis Carroll}}s ''{{w|Alice's Adventures in Wonderland}}'' in which the protagonist follows
the {{w|White Rabbit}} down a rabbit hole to find herself in the {{w|Wonderland (fictional country)|Wonderland}}. Here, Beret Guy literally enters a {{w|Burrow|rabbit hole}}.

In the original version from [[2712: Gravity]] there was a text spoken by Beret Guy: "I don't know why people complain about going down rabbit holes. These lil guys are adorable!"
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the rabbit hole
| a dna base pair
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| To the right from the rabbit hole
| Two stones with sails attached, sliding on the ground towards Ponytail and Megan
|
This is an overly literal reference to the natural phenomenon of {{w|Sailing stones}}.

In the original version, Ponytail was saying: "Ahh, the mysterious natural wonders of sailing stones"
|-
| People
| To the right from sailing stones
| Black Hat aiming a bow at a satellite not far above the ground
| Probably a reference to "Consequence archery" from [[1920: Emoji Sports]]
|-
| Item
| Just above the satellite
| an eye in the sky
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right of the satellite
| A lake with an eel swimming in it
|
|-
| Item
| In the grass near the eel-lake
| a smooth green snake
| The whole message says: ''You found a smooth green snake! It curls up in your hand and naps.''
|-
| Landscape
| On the other side of a grassy area by the eel-lake
| A small erupting volcano
| In the original version, the volcano was making a ''DOOT!'' sound. It is a reference to the "Doot cone" of [[1714: Volcano Types]]
|-
| People
| To the right of the volcano cone
| White Hat and Cueball standing, another person charging them with a sword held above head. Cueball is holding a small object in his left hand, the arm stretched towards the attacker.
|
|-
| People
| To the right of the person with sword
| Baby Hairbun running towards baby Megan. Megan is making a kicking move like in a soccer game, but there's no ball drawn.
|
|-
| People
| To the right of the girls playing
| A person with a wide-rimmed hat driving a tractor. The ground strangely sticks to its wheels.
|
This scene and three following ones are references to ''What If? 2'' Chapter 64: Lemon Drops and Gumdrops, where it rains candy.

{{w|Lemon drop (candy)|Lemon drops}} and {{w|gumdrop}}s are made mostly of {{w|sugar}} and {{w|pectin}}s to create thick, sticky texture.
If such confectionery would fall on the ground in copious amounts such as during heavy rainfall, and partially dissolve in water bodies
or ground water, it would make the surface sticky and gross,{{citation needed}} affecting movement, such as the farmer's tractor having
trouble going. {{w|Tractor}}s used e.g. in agriculture may already have trouble going on really muddy soils, the addition of candy
makes it worse.
|-
| People
| To the right of the tractor
| Megan and Cueball standing on a shore of a shallow lake, Cueball is poking a stick into the water which strangely sticks to it.
| A candyfall happening for a prolonged time would replace some water in lakes etc. and dissolve in them, turning them into a {{w|syrup}}.
|-
| Landscape
| Over the shallow lake of sticky water
| A hummingbird flying
|
The only creature satisfied with the candyfall is the {{w|hummingbird}} which feeds on {{w|nectar}}, which is essentially {{w|syrup}}
produced naturally within {{w|flower}}s. In the original version, the bird exclaims ''YESSSSSSS!''
|-
| People
| To the right of the shallow lake
| Cueball with his head apparently tilted back, being hit by something falling from above.
PLINK
:'''Cueball''': OW!
PLINK
:'''Cueball''': OW!
|
Seeing the candyfall, Cueball attempts to eat some of it, by just opening his mouth and letting the candy fall in.
However, as anybody who tried a trick of throwing a piece of candy upwards and catching it in one's mouth knows,
having the candy hit one's teeth is a rather painful experience.
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| At the bottom of the shallow lake
| a sunken treasure
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| People
| Further to the right from the shallow lake
| A person (Hairy?) sitting on a large heap of bananas, Cueball standing aside.
|
In the original version Hairy says: "I'm Bananas Georg. Every year our company publishes global per capita banana consumption numbers,
so to make the printing easier, I eat enough bananas of December 31st to make sure it's a round number."
|-
| People
| Next to Bananas Georg
| Megan standing on a brim of a small valley, another person standing in the valley with a small animal by his feet.
:'''Megan''': Hi, Ryan!
|
|-
| Item
| Just above Ryan
| an asterisk
| The whole message says: ''You found an asterisk. it doesn’t seem to refer to anything.''
|-
| People
| To the right from the valley with Ryan
| Cueball and Megan are standing in a dugout. Cueball holds a spade.
| In the original version Cueball says: "Weird, I feel ''heavier''."
|-
| Upgrade
| Next to Cueball with a spade
| ''The Yellowstone Super What? Your launch speed has increased.''
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right from the dugout
| A river, a waterfall and a lake below the falls. On the top of the waterfall Cueball faces two persons with police hats on. There's a fat hose labelled "Niagara water" leading from the waterfall into a building labelled "LHC". Someone in the building shouts:
:Hey!
| The abbreviation "LHC" stands for the {{w|Large Hadron Collider}}. This scene is a reference to {{what if|147|Niagara Straw}}.
|-
| Item
| Next to the LHC
| a large hadron
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right from the LHC
| A large, rippled body of water. Two people in a boat are sailing towards an UFO-shaped large rock being ejected from the water into space. Another two people are standing on the rock.
| This is a reference to ''What If? 2'' Chapter 50: Japan Runs an Errand
|-
| Landscape
| In the large body of water
| A tube to the bottom of the ocean. Megan is standing at the bottom.
| This is a reference to ''What If? 2'' Chapter 50: Mariana Trench Tube
|-
| Upgrade
| To the right of a large rippled body of water, on a big cloud
| ''Nutritional Facts - Serving Size: 1 Cloud, Total Calories: 0. Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| To the right of a bunch of clouds
| Megan sitting on a rectangular block, facing another upright block.
|
|-
| People
| To the right of blocks and stones area.
| White Hat walking through a patch of grass along Hairbun, who's looking at her mobile phone.
| In the original version, Ponytail was saying: "I checked downforeveryoneorjustme.com and it says just me." to what White Hat responded: "Yeah, I guess down isn't down for everyone."
|-
| Item
| In the middle of a patch of forest
| a secret leaf
|
|-
| Item
| Under a large tree in the rightmost part of the forest
| a stick
|
|-
| Landscape
| To the right from the forest
| A tower crane lowering a comet onto a place with two dinosaurs
| This is a reference to {{what if|162|Comet Ice}}
In the original version, crane operator was saying: "How am I supposed to cause the extinction of the dinosaurs if they keep moving out from under my comet?"
|-
| Item
| Under the crane's beam
| a sterile neutrino
|
|-
| Item
| To the right of the crane
| a pair of squirrel goggles
|
|-
| People
| To the right of the crane
| Knit Cap observing an object moving at supersonic speed next to him.
:''BOOM''
| This is a reference to ''What If? 2'' Chapter 56: Walking Backward in Time, where these squirrels are surprisingly present in the past.
In the original version, Knit Cap was saying: "Unusually high-speed squirrels."
|-
| People
| To the right of a supersonic squirrel.
| Danish standing in a swimming pool, Cueball on the brim.
| In the original version, Danish was exclaiming: "Jump in! The water's fine!"
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the swimming pool next to Danish
| a steam calliope
''our engine gets a little more powerful.''

|-
| rowspan="40" valign="top" | '''Subway Planet'''
| Landscape
| Many places
| '''Warning! Air and Space Museum black hole ahead!<br/>Turn back while you still have enough engine thrust!''
|
This warns the player about a black hole present inside the planet in the center of Washington, D.C. area.
Once the player gets close and is pulled onto the surface of the black hole, it is not possible to launch off of it without the Hyperdrive.
The only way to get unstuck is pressing the Home button.

It's a reference to the {{w|Intrepid Sea, Air & Space Museum|''Intrepid'' Sea, Air & Space Museum}}.
|-
| Upgrade
| At a large opening in the planet's surface
| ''You get the feeling you're not in Kansas anymore. Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
|-
| People
| On the right side of the large opening in the planet
| Megan and Cueball standing on the edge. Cueball is leaning forward, looking down.
:'''Cueball''': Where's Boston?
:'''Megan''': I think M.I.T. kids took it.
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the entrance to a triple-wide tunnel leading down to NYC
| a hot dog
''Your launch speed has increased.''
|
|-
| People
| On the surface to the right of the tunnels leading to NYC
| Cueball and Danish walking.
:'''Cueball''': Why did those M.I.T. kids keep talking about Morgantown?
:'''Danish''': They're just transit enthusiasts, I guess.
:'''Cueball''': But Morgantown is tiny. It can't possibly have a subway, can it?
:'''Danish''': Not exactly...
|
|-
| People
| On the surface above Santo Domingo
| Hairy and White Hat.
:'''Hairy''': A lot of people don't realize that North America only has one subway system; each city's metro is just one part of the network.
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| At the entrance to a tunnel leading to Santo Domingo / Monterrey area
| a bottle of Coke Absolute Zero
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| People
| On the surface to the right of the Mexico City
|
:'''Ponytail''': Welcome to the Subway Planet, home of all North America's metro systems!
|
|-
| People
| Further to the right
| Ponytail and Cueball. Cueball is holding a four-wheeled suitcase.
:'''Ponytail''': Boston? No, that's on the other side of the planet. Or used to be, anyway.
|
|-
| People
| Further to the right
| Ponytail and Megan walking.
:'''Ponytail''': My favorite thing about visiting Origin is all the pointing sculptures. They make it so easy to navigate!
|
|-
| People
| On the surface next to San Francisco
| Cueball and Megan standing on the opposite sides of a tunnel entrance.
:'''Cueball''': If you're looking for someone to track down those M.I.T. kid, you could try asking CalTech.
:'''Megan''': But we're in San Francisco; Isn't CalTech in Pasadena?
:'''Cueball''': Yeah, it's down there somewhere.
|
|-
| People
| Between San Francisco and Vancouver
| Ponytail jumping across a tunnel entrance.
:'''Ponytail''': Vancouver!
|
|-
| People
| Vancouver
| Cueball and Ponytail looking up.
:'''Cueball''': Huh, I never noticed that crack in the crystal sphere before.
|
|-
| People
| Down in the tunnels in Montreal
|
:'''Knit Cap''': Bienvenue à Montréal!
|
|-
| People
| At the bottom of the large hole in the planet's surface
| Miss Lenhart and Megan.
:'''Miss Lenhart''': I hear M.I.T. kids were working on a cloaking device. Boston could be anywhere.
|
|-
| Item
| In a short dead-end tunnel near the right side of the hole
| a Cybiko® wireless handheld computer for teens (2000)
|
|-
| Item
| In a short dead-end tunnel down in NYC
| a handful of quantum foam
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Down in the tunnels of New York City
| a brightly-lit billboard
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| Item
| Down in NYC
| a normal-sized apple
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the tunnel leading from New York City to Washington, D.C.
| a friendly cat
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| Down in Mexico
| Cueball sitting on a ledge, Megan standing below, looking down
:'''Megan''': You'd need some powerful thrusters to make it down there and back.
|
|-
| People
| Monterrey
| Megan looking at her phone
<code>xkcd.com/1196</code>
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In a short dead-end tunnel near Miami
| a beige electron
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Item
| In a short dead-end tunnel in Toronto
| a relativistic bowling ball
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| Further down in Toronto
| $30 in Yahoo
''You found $30 in Yahoo! cash! Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| Down in San Francisco
| ''The next stop is Interplanetary Terminal G. Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| Down in Los Angeles
| A rectangular chamber connected to a tunnel. Megan is standing at the entrance to it, Hairbun and Cueball are inside.
:'''Megan''': Welcome to CalTech!
:'''Hairbun''': The M.I.T. cloaking device control? It's in Morgantown, WV.
:'''Cueball''': Figures.
|
|-
| People
| Left and down from the CalTech chamber
| Jill standing in the tunnel.
:'''Jill''': Stop! This line goes to D.C.! Ever since the Air and Space Museum put in the black hole exhibit, it's been difficult to return without enough engine thrust.
| This is a more elaborate version of the warning plastered all over the inside of the planet. See the first entry on the Subway Planet above.
|-
| Upgrade
| In a tunnel between Los Angeles and Philadelphia
| ''There is no parking in the white zone. Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| Upgrade
| In a long straight dead-end tunnel near Philadelphia
| ''You feel accomplished. Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| People
| Down in Philadelphia
| Cueball sitting on a slope.
:'''Cueball''': Morgantown? You could get there via Philly and Baltimore, but that would take you near the Museum. Might be safer to take the red line from Atlanta.
|
|-
| Message
| In a tunnel in Washington, close to the black hole
| ''Transfer here for Mornington Crescent''
|
|-
| Landscape
| In the center of Washington, D.C.
| The Air and Space Museum's black hole pictured as a dark circle with shiny rings around it. It is impossible to escape it without the Hyperdrive. If caught there, hit the Home button.
|
This object does not behave like a real {{w|black hole}} as anything getting close enough (below the {{w|Schwarzschild radius}}) will never emerge from it again.
In the game, however, one can land on the surface of it and launch off it, provided that the engine thrust has been greatly increased by the Hyperdrive.
The object behaves like a dense, spherical solid having a large mass and hence exerting significant gravitational force, more like a {{w|super-Earth}}.
|-
| Landscape
| In the tunnel leading from Washington to Morgantown
| A sign with an arrow, saying ''WV''
| ''WV'' is a common abbreviation for the U.S. state of {{w|West Virginia}} in which {{w|Morgantown, West Virginia|Morgantown}} lies.
|-
| People
| In Morgantown
| Cueball sitting at a subway station (a round chamber a bit wider than the tunnel) at a strange angle to the surface
:'''Cueball''': Welcome to Morgantown!
|
|-
| Token
| In Morgantown
| ''MIT Cloaking Device deactivated! Boston detected.''
|
|-
| Landscape
| Along the tunnels from Morgantown up to the surface near Mexico
| A grey line with a circle at Morgantown end and an arrow at the other end
| This line appears only after the Cloaking Device is deactivated and points to the Boston planet.
|-
| People
| In the tunnel leading from Morgantown to Atlanta
| Megan standing at a subway station at a strange angle to the surface
:'''Megan''': Welcome to Morgantown!
|
|-
| People
| Further along the tunnel from Morgantown to Atlanta
| Megan sitting
:'''Megan''': I think I'm stuck. I can't even see the black hole from here!
|
|-
| People
| At the joint of the tunnels leading to Morgantown and Washington, D.C.
| Cueball sitting on the edge, his elbow on his thigh, and his chin resting on his hand.
:'''Cueball ''': Where does that line go?
|

|-
| rowspan="15" valign="top" | '''Boston Planet'''
| People
| Next to the entrance of the blue line, labelled "Wonderland"
|
:'''Cueball''': There's a token to open each T line. The blue line token is right here in Boston.
|
|-
| Token
| Over the blue line entrance
| ''Blue line deactivated!''
|
|-
| People
| On the other side of the entrance of the blue line
| White Hat with his arms stretched facing Ponytail
:'''White Hat''': Welcome to Wonderland!
|
|-
| People
| Next to the entrance of the red line, labelled "Braintree"
| Cueball and Megan
:'''Cueball''': Transfer here to Skinflower and Bonevine.
|
{{w|Braintree, Massachusetts}} is a real-world town in the {{w|Greater Boston}} area, where the {{w|Massachusetts Bay Transportation Authority|MBTA}} {{w|MBTA subway|subway}}
{{w|Red_Line_(MBTA)|red line}} terminal {{w|Braintree station (MBTA)|station}} is located.
The funny-sounding name of the town has inspired Randall to create two fictional station names following the same pattern of animal organ + plant form: Skinflower and Bonevine.
These names also appear on the map in [[1196: Subways]].
|-
| People
| Next to the entrance of the green line, labelled "Riverside"
|
:'''Cueball''': I can't believe the green line goes all the way to Los Angeles.
|
|-
| People
| Next to the other entrance of the green line, labelled "Boston College"
| Megan and Ponytail talking.
:'''Megan''': Boston is a lot of places. It's on the East Coast of North America, but it's also on the surface of the Earth.
:'''Ponytail''': And on some playlists.
:'''Megan''': And of course it's right here!
|
|-
| People
| Next to another entrance of the green line, labelled "Medford/Tufts"
|
:'''Cueball''': I can't believe the green line extension is finally open.
|
|-
| People
| Down the blue line tunnel
|
:'''Cueball''': The red line token? It's in Boston.
| rowspan = "4" valign = "center" |
Cueball states the fact that there are many places named Boston or alluding to Boston in the game and the remaining subway tokens
(besides the blue line one, which was needed to get into the blue line tunnel in order to read Cueball's hints)
are located in or near such places. To find where the other tokens are, sort the table by the '''Type''' column and look up entries named "Token".
|-
| People
| Further down the blue line tunnel
|
:'''Cueball''': The green line token is in Boston, too.
|-
| People
| Still further down the blue line tunnel
|
:'''Cueball''': The orange line token is also in Boston.
|-
| People
| Near the intersection of the blue and orange lines tunnels
|
:'''Cueball''': There are a lot of Bostons in this universe.
|-
| People
| In the red line tunnel, down from Braintree.
| Megan and Cueball walking.
:'''Cueball''': You know, the locals actually pronounce it "Quinchy"
|
This is a reference to {{w|Quincy, Massachusetts}}, a city through which the {{w|MBTA subway|Boston subway}} {{w|Red_Line_(MBTA)|red line}} goes.
Four stations are located within the city limits: {{w|North Quincy station|North Quincy}}, {{w|Wollaston station|Wollaston}},
{{w|Quincy Center station|Quincy Center}} and {{w|Quincy Adams station|Quincy Adams}}. The word "quinchy" is a rather obscene slang expression, look it up in Urban Dictionary.
|-
| People
| In the red line tunnel, next to a place labelled "MIT".
|
:'''Megan ''': The hyperdrive works pretty well, but use it carefully. Try not to fly into walls at full speed.
|
|-
| Upgrade
| In the red line tunnel, next to a place labelled "MIT".
| ''Welcome to MIT! You acquired a hyperdrive!''
|
|-
| In the center of the planet
| Item
| a strangely heavy subway token
| This item is only accessible before the Boston planet is uncloaked.

|-
| rowspan="6" valign="top" | '''Crystal Sphere'''
| Close to the interior edge to the left of the crack
| Upgrade
| ''A significant boost to the engines for a curious pilot. Your engine thrust has increased significantly.''
|
|-
| On the interior edge approx. a quarter of the full circle to the right of the crack
| Item + Upgrade
| the gold crown Archimedes stole
''Your engine thrust has increased significantly.''
|
|-
| On the interior edge almost opposite the crack
| Item
| a necklace of element samples whose symbols spell out your name
| The full message says: ''You found a necklace of element samples whose symbols spell out your name (note: hopefully you are not named 'Katherine' or 'Brandon')!''
|-
| On the exterior edge approx. a quarter of the full circle to the left of the crack
| Item
| the platinum cylinder formerly used to define the kilogram
|
|-
| Some distance off the exterior edge approx. a quarter of the full circle to the right of the crack
| Item + Upgrade
| a needle in a haystack
''Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|
|-
| Inside the Crystal Sphere between Boston and Round planets
| Upgrade
| ''You found a handful of the quantum foam that makes up the fabric of space! Your engine gets a little more powerful.''
|

|-
| rowspan="3" valign="top" | '''Crack in the Crystal Sphere'''
| On the left side of the entrance to the crack in the sphere
| Message
| Left lane must turn left
|
|-
| On the right side of the entrance to the crack
| Message
| Right lane must turn right
|
|-
| Inside the crack more than a halfway though it
| Upgrade
| ''There is a way out. Your launch speed has increased.''
|

|-
| rowspan="18" valign="top" | '''Star Destroyer'''
| colspan="4" |
The two ships (the Destroyer itself and the smaller Corellian Corvette aka Rebel Blockade Runner below it) are copied from [[1608: Hoverboard]] with minor alterations
and with this comic's specific features added: items, powerups and messages. They feature a lot of scenes with people and many strange objects.

The below list contains only the specific game objects and a couple of scenes that have been altered with regard to the original.
For explanations of the puns, dialogues and scenes on board the ships, go to the [[1608: Hoverboard#Table with references|table with references]] on the explanation
page of the Hoverboard comic.
|-
| Item
| In an empty room of the Destroyer on the other end of the tunnel leading aft from the room with piñata party
| a lymphocyte
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| In the room in the center of the Rotary (round tunnel)
| a vintage Juicero juicer
''Your thrusters are more efficient now.''
|
|-
| Item
| In a room to the right of the Rotary inside hamster ball Megan is riding in
| an out-of-control trolley
|
|-
| Item + Upgrade
| On the upper surface of the Destroyer, to the left of the cowboy
| a perpetual motion fidget spinner
''Your tanks recharge a bit faster now.''
|
|-
| Item
| In the dance hall
| a glass slipper with a glass foot in it
|
|-
| Item
| In the rotunda within the Imperial Park Chamber
| a helium-238 nucleus
|
|-
| Message
| In the ventral dome, next to the warning sign
| Hmmm.
|
|-
| Item
| In the ''Prince of Persia'' maze
| a cluster of data points
|
|-
| Item
| In the ''Prince of Persia'' maze
| a premium subscription to food
| The whole message says: ''You found a premium subscription to food.net!''
|-
| Item
| Next to a giant light bulb in the lowest aft chamber
| a Bursa of Fabricius
|
|-
| Item
| In the middle aft chamber
| two goats and a new car
|
|-
| Item
| Under the top dome
| an unread email
| The whole message says: ''You found an unread email. better leave it unread.''
|-
| People
| In the control room below the top dome
| Darth Vader talks to Hairy
:'''Darth Vader''': (breathe)<br/> But all murderbot really wants is watch Rise and Fall of Sanctuary Moon,<br/> (breathe)<br/> which is a soap – are you getting all this?
:'''Hairy''': Yes, my lord!
| '''Note:''' the dialogue has been changed from what was present in the original version.
|-
| People
| The control room of the Corellian Corvette
| Danish standing next to a console on the upper deck of the bow section, Hairbun right behind, her fists clenched.
:'''Danish''': Captain's log, stardate April 3rd, 2023...
:'''Hairbun''': Augh! No!
| '''Note:''' the dialogue has been changed from what was present in the original version by updating the date.
|-
| Item
| At the entrance to the control room
| a forged resume
|
|-
| Item
| At the end of the tunnel leading fore from the main chamber
| the Death Star plans
|
|-
| Item
| At the focal point of the upper dish antenna
| a serif
|


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{{DEFAULTSORT:2765}}
[[Category:Comic subpages]]

2676: Historical Dates

2026-05-15T16:00:19Z

FaviFake: cat

{{comic
| number = 2676
| date = September 23, 2022
| title = Historical Dates
| image = historical_dates_2x.png
| imagesize = 305x438px
| noexpand = true
| titletext = Evidence suggests the 1899 transactions occurred as part of a global event centered around a deity associated with the lotus flower.
}}

==Explanation==

Many files and database entries contain a date. When it is not set, it often defaults to the first day in the system. The two dates listed below are mentioned as "significant" in the comic.

===Dec 30th, 1899===
Dec 30th, 1899 comes from a [https://www.joelonsoftware.com/2006/06/16/my-first-billg-review/ spreadsheet date compatibility issue] between Excel and Lotus 1-2-3 (referenced in the title text.) Spreadsheets store dates as sequential numbers so that they can be used in calculations. In Excel, by default, January 1, 1900 is number 1 [https://support.microsoft.com/en-us/office/datevalue-function-df8b07d4-7761-4a93-bc33-b7471bbff252]. Based on that, Excel's integer date representation would be the number of days that have passed since December 31, 1899. However, because of a bug intentionally carried over from Lotus 1-2-3 where it counts February 29, 1900 as a day even though it actually was not [https://learn.microsoft.com/en-us/office/troubleshoot/excel/wrongly-assumes-1900-is-leap-year], for any day since then, Excel's integer date representation is actually the number of days that have passed since December 30, 1899. Most other spreadsheet applications copied the behavior of Excel to maintain compatibility with it. This leads to the value of 0 in some applications (notably Open- and LibreOffice Calc and Google Spreadsheets) being interpreted as Dec 30th, 1899. Similarly, Microsoft Visual Basic and Visual Basic for Applications (VBA) interpret 0.0 as Dec 30th, 1899.

The historian in the comic presents some research wrongly based only on the number of entries created on those dates. This confusion on the part of the future historian only grows in the title text, where they make the claim that Lotus 1-2-3 is, in fact, religious imagery related to some sort of deity, potentially a lotus god, around whom the '1899 event' took place. This may be poking fun at the trope that anthropologists attribute any behavior they can't explain to religious ritual.{{Actual citation needed}} This historian's confusion may have been at least partially due to China's {{w|White Lotus|White Lotus Religion}}.

===Jan 1st, 1970===
Many operating systems and software store dates as {{w|Unix time|Unix timestamps}}, which are defined as the number of seconds since Jan 1st, 1970, 0:00 UTC. When data entry neglects to provide a value, the system may be programmed to treat it as 0; consequently, an unprovided timestamp value is interpreted as Jan 1st, 1970 thereby creating the illusion of an "activity spike" on that date.

==Transcript==
:[Miss Lenhart is lecturing, pointing at a futuristic holographic display emanating upwards from a unit on the floor. It shows a presentation that features a timeline with two visible dates, 1899 and 1970. At the top of the hologram are two lines of text, above "1899" are three lines of text, above "1970" is one line of text, below "1899" are two lines of text, and below "1970" is one line of text; all of these lines of text are illegible.]
:Miss Lenhart: Historical records show millions of business transactions occurred on Dec 30<sup>th</sup>, 1899.
:Miss Lenhart: This economic activity sparked the digital age, culminating in a "data festival" on Jan 1<sup>st</sup>, 1970, when many early digital files were created.

:[Caption under the panel:]
:It's going to be weird when historians forget why some dates show up a lot.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Calendar]]
[[Category:Time]]
[[Category:Programming]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Miss Lenhart]]