explain xkcd - User contributions [en]

1997: Business Update

2022-05-04T18:39:33Z

Zehka: Undo revision 240555 by Ex Kay Cee Dee (talk)

{{comic
| number = 1997
| date = May 23, 2018
| title = Business Update
| image = business_update.png
| titletext = Our customers keep sending us their personal information, even though we've repeatedly asked them to stop. The EU told me I'm the heir to some ancient European throne that makes me exempt from the GDPR, but we should probably still try to fix that.
}}

==Explanation==
This comic shows a meeting at [[Beret Guy]]'s business (as seen in [[:Category:Beret Guy's Business|these other comics]]). As usual, those in the business demonstrate a misuse of business terminology and take strange happenings within the business in their stride.

Though maintaining a semblance of business-savviness through the use of many corporate buzzwords, it becomes clear that what is normally metaphorical in a usual boardroom meeting is here are quite likely meant literally. The Quarterly Reports, described as "looking good," may be literally physically attractive (rather than recording successful business dealings). Beret Guy's comment that "the office is full of cash" seems to be an ordinary comment at a glace, but him saying that the office ''contains'' a lot of money instead of ''has'' a lot of money implies that the office is literally full of money, like coins, dollar bills, twenty dollar bills, etc., and not simply economically well-off. Most businesses keep their money in banks; any business that keeps all their money insecurely in the office is either criminally shady or incompetent.

"We're producing stocks [as in the stock market, a.k.a. shares] faster than ever before." Stocks are valuable, so from an outside perspective making more of them would create value. However, the humor of this situation is that in real life, creating shares from nothing would reduce the value of existing shares (as the combined value of stocks should add up to the total value of the company...so creating more stocks means each has to be worth less to make the addition balance out). This is ironic in that typically stocks represent the value of the company, rather than being the product being created.

Alternatively, the company may be producing the leg restraints known as {{w|Stocks|stocks}}. It's unlikely that there would be many people wishing to buy these stocks. Conversely, if what they are making is ''soup'' stocks, then it could be related to the 'rapid growth' (i.e., obesity) of the customers.

"Rapid growth" is something a business is supposed to attain for itself or its userbase, not its individual customers. If the customers are not children they are likely very concerned by this rapid growth, as should be Beret Guy if the rapid growth is being caused by his business and its products.

"Liquidating assets" typically means that assets are being sold off for money rather than being retained or used. Assets "liquidated" in a thermostat glitch, meanwhile, may have been literally melted ("turned into liquid"). It could also mean that their infrastructure is so hilariously messed up (and/or the assets so bizarre) that a simple glitch in a thermostat somehow resulted in the loss of a large amount of the company's assets. Note that this type of thing is not entirely unheard of, as shown by [https://thehackernews.com/2018/04/iot-hacking-thermometer.html a hack of a thermostat in a casino that led to massive data loss in 2017].

"Original content" is a catch-all term for unique creative products created by a website, e.g. articles, videos or TV shows. However, it is not typically used to describe sinks, which only provide water. Since the business team regards it as a problem, this means the sink is likely leaking or backing up, possibly with polluted water or rotting food waste, or perhaps creating things one would not expect a sink to dispense or even to exist (depending on how "original" this original content is).

Transmuting lead into gold was a {{w|Nuclear transmutation#Alchemy|goal of alchemists}} for many centuries. With modern nuclear technology, it is actually now possible to accomplish transmutation of lead into gold, and gold into lead. While the expense far exceeds the value of the gold produced by such methods, it seems plausible that, given Beret Guy's surpassing strangeness, his company may be successfully and cheaply transmuting large quantities of lead into gold and back again. Since gold is worth much more than lead in today's market, the first transmutation could indeed result in major profit, while the reverse would obviously result in major losses, and be a rather pointless undertaking for a typical, profit-oriented business.

It is also worth noting that the "largest source of revenue" may not be producing much revenue at all; it can still be the biggest if there are no others. On the other hand, past experience with Beret Guy's business would indicate that this company is [[1032: Networking|making plenty of money]], though they aren't necessarily sure [[1493: Meeting|how]].

Alternately, Beret Guy may be speaking literally about their "biggest source of revenue," referring not to the amount of revenue generated, but to the physical size of the source itself. A facility capable of transmuting heavy elements would most likely be constructed around a large particle accelerator such as a synchrotron, and accelerators of this type commonly measure several kilometers in diameter. Such a facility would likely be the largest physical structure owned by a commercial entity.

In the last panel, "the girl from ''The Ring''" refers to Sadako Yamamura, the antagonist of {{w|The Ring (film series)|the ''Ring'' series by Koji Suzuki}}, or her counterpart Samara Morgan from the {{w|The_Ring_(2002_film)|American remake}}, who has been referenced by xkcd several times in the past — [[396: The Ring]] for example. One of Sadako/Samara's supernatural abilities is to appear in television screens as well as exit from them into the real world. Beret Guy claims she has done this several times in their video conferences, which may be possible if someone has hacked their video feed to play footage from the 2002 movie. However, some of Beret Guy's employees then proceed to remark that she has made contributions to the meetings in question, implying that the image of Sadako/Samara is not only alive but sentient and communicating with the employees, rather than killing them as she typically does in her movies. It's also possible that Sadako/Samara is simply the recording from the series, and her contributions are just in keeping with the general tone of the company's video conferences. Either way, it would appear that Beret Guy's sheer eccentricity has affected his staff to the point that a digital spectre would not be an abnormal employee; they're also oddly nonchalant about a movie character appearing in the real world, and at Sadako/Samara's out-of-character behavior.

The title text refers to the May 25 deadline to implement the European Union's {{w|GDPR|General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR)}}; this comic parodies a business meeting about what the company is doing to prepare for it. However, while normally the problem would be how to handle the customers' personal information that the company requires to retain in order to do business, in this case it seems the company does not require personal information at all, and instead, customers are sending them theirs on their own (and they refuse to stop doing it!). Even more bizarrely, Beret Guy was told by the EU (or at least, he thinks he was) that he is exempt because he is European royalty of some kind, which would give him {{w|sovereign immunity}}, but he wants to fix this problem anyway, just to be on the safe side.

==Transcript==
:[Beret Guy, Ponytail, Hairy, Hairbun and Megan sit around a table, left to right. Beret Guy and Megan are sitting on chairs at the ends. All others are behind the table with no visible chairs. All characters face Beret Guy.]
:Beret Guy: Quarterly reports are looking good.
:Beret Guy: Our office is full of cash, we're producing stocks faster than ever before, and our customers are experiencing rapid growth.
:Beret Guy: Any updates?

:[Closeup on Ponytail, facing left.]
:Ponytail: Bad news: many of our assets were liquidated this morning due to a thermostat glitch.
:Ponytail: Good news: the sink in the kitchen has stopped producing original content.

:[Same as panel one, but characters are facing Megan.]
:Beret Guy: How are our finances?
:Megan: Our biggest source of revenue is our ongoing project to transmute lead into gold.
:Megan: Our biggest expense is our project to transmute it back.

:[Closeup on Beret Guy, facing right, offset to the left of the panel. Two characters speak from off-panel right.]
:Beret Guy: Lastly, any luck getting the girl from ''The Ring'' to stop showing up in our video conferences?
:Off-panel person 1: No, but honestly, she's made some good contributions.
:Off-panel person 2: Yeah, I think we should hire her.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Beret Guy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairy]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Beret Guy's Business]]
[[Category:Stock Market]]

1801: Decision Paralysis

2022-05-04T17:56:50Z

Zehka: Undo revision 241261 by Ex Kay Cee Dee (talk)

{{comic
| number = 1801
| date = February 20, 2017
| title = Decision Paralysis
| image = decision_paralysis.png
| titletext = Good point--making no decision is itself a decision. So that's a THIRD option I have to research!
}}

==Explanation==
This comic illustrates a common problem in the internet era where, with the wealth of knowledge available to us at all times, one puts undue weight on otherwise arbitrary decisions.

This is taken to a comedic extreme by showing how [[Cueball]] is unable to make a critical, time-sensitive choice without putting hours of research in to justify it. Any benefit to researching the imminent decision of "which car will get us to our destination fastest" will be more than offset by the time it takes to make that decision.{{Citation needed}} The inability to make a snap judgment in this case will prove very destructive as the bomb mentioned by [[Megan]] will now likely detonate before they get to the base. The difference in time/effort needed to steal either car is likely presumed to be insignificant to this scenario.

In the caption below the comic [[Randall]] gives the reader one of his [[:Category:Protip|recurring protips]]. In the tip, he reveals a weakness for his potential opponents to exploit. Randall admits to having the same problems with decision-making as Cueball, and suggests that if he were placed in an equally urgent situation testing his (in)ability to choose, he would fail just as spectacularly, as long as he had free access to the internet. As the old saying goes, "give 'em enough rope, and they'll hang themselves"; in this case, give Randall enough internet access, and he'll get caught in an indefinite research loop.

The title text continues this absurdity by bringing a third option to the table, the choice of inaction (which by wasting his time on calculations and research, Cueball has taken), a choice here that seems unacceptable, but the time spent mentioning (and researching it) simply adds to that already spent researching the two cars. Of course this option ensures that they are not killed when the bomb explodes, because they will not be anywhere close to the base. That might make it the only reasonable choice left after wasting so much time pondering which car to steal.

That not making a choice is also a choice has often been mentioned in literature and other places, like when the band {{w|Rush (band)|Rush}} in their song {{w|Freewill (song)|Freewill}} sings "If you choose not to decide - You still have made a choice".

Supposing both of them know how to drive (and steal) a car and defuse the bomb, the best option in this situation is to leave the phone in the pocket and steal both cars, and see who gets there first to defuse the bomb. This would both ensure one of them reaches the base as quick as possible and at the same time resolve the problem of which car would be best for the problem. Of course that would also have defused the joke, [[No Pun Intended]]...

==Transcript==
:[Megan and Cueball are standing near two sport cars. Megan points excitedly at the cars while Cueball looks at his smartphone.]
:Megan: There! If we steal one of those cars, we can get to the base and defuse the bomb!
:Cueball: Hmm, the one on the left accelerates faster but has a lower top speed.
:Cueball: Ooh, the right one has good traction control. Are the roads wet?

:[Caption below the frame:]
:Protip: If you ever need to defeat me, just give me two very similar options and unlimited internet access.

==Trivia==
*The problem of choosing between cars with different accelerations and top speeds is the center of the car customization mechanic introduced in the seventh installment of the {{w|Mario Kart}} series.
*It is known that Randall has played some version of the game, as it has become a [[:Category:Mario Kart|recurring theme]].
*Although presented as a joke, this is a very real problem in electronics design. ''{{w|Buridan’s principle}}'' by none other than {{w|Leslie Lamport}} [http://research.microsoft.com/users/lamport/pubs/buridan.pdf states]:
::"A discrete decision based upon an input having a continuous range of values cannot be made within a bounded length of time."
*This is not the first time that Randall has made a comic that tells his readers how to trick him (or his friends) like in [[1121: Identity]], where he notes how to get his password from a friend.
*In [[1445: Efficiency]] Randall describes why he is so inefficient (again, demonstrating the option 3 beautifully,) and in [[309: Shopping Teams]] two nerds out shopping have to choose between two similar objects and end up in a similar situation, though without a deadly deadline.
*This was the first of two comics in a row where having access to the internet on a smartphone while out walking is a major part of the plot, the next being [[1802: Phone]], where Randall find that it is a problem that it is impossible to take a walk without being updated on his phones feed all the time.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Protip]]
[[Category:Smartphones]]

771: Period Speech

2022-05-04T17:54:04Z

Zehka: Undo revision 241259 by Ex Kay Cee Dee (talk)

{{comic
| number = 771
| date = July 26, 2010
| title = Period Speech
| image = period_speech.png
| titletext = The same people who spend their weekends at the Blogger Reenactment Festivals will whine about the anachronisms in historical movies, but no one else will care.
}}

==Explanation==
The actors on this stage are using language and technology from wildly different time periods:
* "Forsooth" is an interjection from {{w|Elizabethan era|Elizabethan times}} (1558–1603).
* "{{w|Grok}}" is a word from the 1961 {{w|Robert Anson Heinlein|Robert Heinlein}} novel {{w|Stranger in a Strange Land}}.
* "Jive" is African American slang from the 1940s to the 70s.
* "Me Hearties" is popular 'pirate speak', which purports to come from the {{w|Golden Age of Piracy}} (1650-1726) but was actually popularized by the 1950 film {{w|Treasure Island (1950 film)|''Treasure Island''}}, based on Robert Louis Stevenson's 1883 novel of the same title. Actor Robert Newton played the pirate Long John Silver with an exaggerated "West Country" accent (his native dialect) and it became associated with all pirates.
* "Ten-Four" is {{w|Ten-code|police code}} for "Yes" and was popular during the 1970s CB radio craze.

Put together, the exchange roughly translates to "Do you truly understand what I'm saying, my friends?"/"Yes, we understand!".) The characters also combine archaic weapons like a spear and a sword with a presumably modern handgun and a laptop, adding to the growing heap of anachronisms.

[[Randall]]'s contention is that hundreds of years from now, people will make similar errors that we do today when depicting historical items and language. Modern movies, fiction, and other forms of media that depict history often confuse terms, items, and equipment that were in one place and time period and place them in another, but few people notice because to them, all of it fits under the very broad category of "old, historical things" - only those with an interest in history really notice or seem to care. Thus following this trend, in the future, things like laptop computers and "grok my jive" will seem just as historical and "old-timey" as a spear or the saying "Forsooth!", except to those who participate in such things like "Blogger Reenactment Festivals", as mentioned in the title text.

For instance, take a suit of full plate armor. To most people, plate armor is a "Medieval thing". So thus, when depicting King Arthur, a figure from 500 to 800 AD (if he even existed at all), one would (and has) put him in a suit of full plate because he is "medieval" and that is the stereotypical equipment of a Medieval figure. In actual fact, plate armor only came about after 1350, many centuries after King Arthur would have lived, and it coexisted alongside firearms for a very long time. King Arthur would have worn chainmail, but all of this would be lost on an average person watching a movie about King Arthur, to whom chainmail and full plate are interchangeable under the label of "historical armor" in their minds. It is not much of a jump from a span of 500 to 800 years of equipment being considered interchangeable to 1500 years of equipment and language being interchangeable. A similar confusion of "interchangeably old things" is seen in the title text to [[2396: Wonder Woman 1984]].

The title text likely refers to [[239: Blagofaire]], which features the said "Blogger Reenactment Festivals".

==Transcript==
:[A sword-wielding Cueball on a stage addresses three others; one has a spear, another a handgun and a knife, and the third a laptop.]
:Cueball: Forsooth, do you grok my jive, me hearties?
:Actors: Ten-four!
:[The caption below.]
:A few centuries from now, all the English of the past 400 years will sound equally old-timey and interchangeable.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Language]]
[[Category:Multiple Cueballs]]

642: Creepy

2022-05-04T17:53:26Z

Zehka: Undo revision 241258 by Ex Kay Cee Dee (talk)

{{comic
| number = 642
| date = September 28, 2009
| title = Creepy
| image = creepy.png
| titletext = And I even got out my adorable new netbook!
}}

==Explanation==
This comic displays [[Cueball]]'s fears that his attempts to strike up a conversation with [[Megan]] will only result in her rejecting him and even humiliating him in front of others for attempting to get to know her - he might even risk getting his picture on {{w|Facebook}} with a warning that he is a creep to be avoided. This is because he worries that others might interpret his behavior as {{w|sexual harassment}}, the exaggerated flip-side of his attempted courtship. It turns out in the fifth and last panel that the first four panels was just one large thought bubble on how Cueball fantasized an attempt to contact Megan would turn out.

Ironically, however, Megan is actually attracted to Cueball and is dismayed that he has not spoken to her. Therefore, Cueball's fears are unfounded and are even preventing the two from meeting and possibly forming a relationship. Megan could of course also have spoken to Cueball herself, but she expects him to make a move if he is interested. Thus she also prevents herself from making contact because of her own expectations and fears of rejection.

The title text is the continuation of Megan's apparent journal entry and further emphasizes the irony of the situation: in the attempt to be alluring to Cueball, Megan took out her "adorable new {{w|netbook}}," the very thing Cueball stopped himself from complimenting in the first place.

This comic comments on the unsettling effects of social change, particularly with respect to the advent of {{w|social media}} and to modern sensitivity toward a woman's (or any person's) right to be left alone in public. It points out that attempting to start a conversation with a stranger has become risky, and we have yet to evolve new customs and conventions [http://store.xkcd.com/products/just-shy to signal openness] to such an approach. The risk is aggravated by social media, by which means an innocent misjudgment may subject one to public humiliation - or even worse someone might expect that you had intention of performing some {{w|Sex and the law|sexual crime}} - if that type of info is published with a picture and/or your name on Facebook or {{w|Twitter}} etc. your life could be ruined without any reason. As a result, opportunities to meet other people are missed, loneliness and social isolation are increased, and one may even experience existential fears of being unattractive. Ironically, some people react to this problem by relying on the same social media to stay connected with others.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Megan are sitting on chairs, presumably on a train.]
:Cueball: Hey, cute netbook.
:Megan: ''What.''

:[Zoomed in on Cueball and Megan.]
:Cueball: Your laptop. I just—
:Megan: No, why are you talking to me.

:[Zoomed in on Megan.]
:Megan: Who do you think you are? If I were even slightly interested, I'd have shown it.

:[Both Cueball and Megan, with Megan pointing at Cueball.]
:Megan: Hey everyone, this dude's hitting on me.
:Voice #1: Haha
:Voice #2: Creepy
:Voice #3: Let's get his picture for Facebook to warn others.

:[The previous panel fades into a thought bubble of Cueball.]
:[Cueball and are sitting on chairs, on the train, and Megan is typing on her laptop.]
:Dear blog,
:Cute boy on train still ignoring me.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Romance]]
[[Category:Social interactions]]

1717: Pyramid Honey

2022-05-04T17:51:54Z

Zehka: Undo revision 241263 by Ex Kay Cee Dee (talk)

{{comic
| number = 1717
| date = August 8, 2016
| title = Pyramid Honey
| image = pyramid_honey.png
| titletext = They CLAIM honey was found in the chambers under the pyramids, but this conspiracy goes all the way to the TOP, where the GIANT EYE is!
}}

==Explanation==
Bee {{w|honey}} is a food item with natural antimicrobial properties. It can remain unspoiled for a person's entire lifetime, making it practically nonperishable for ordinary consumers. It is frequently claimed that archaeologists have found jars of honey that have been well-preserved for thousands of years in ancient tombs, often those found in {{w|Egyptian pyramids}}, hence the title ''Pyramid Honey''. The claims are generally assertions that may point to other similar assertions as supporting evidence but do not provide specific details, such as the identity of the actual tombs where such jars have been found, or the names of the archaeologists who have affirmed finding such jars. Repeated encounters with the assertion lead some people to claim that honey's shelf life is "infinite", which is a much stronger claim which would not necessarily be supported by the assertion even assuming it is true.

In the comic, [[Cueball]] tells [[Megan]] about an article in ''{{w|Smithsonian (magazine)|Smithsonian Magazine}}'' (presumably [http://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-science-behind-honeys-eternal-shelf-life-1218690/ this one]) that claims honey has an infinite shelf life. The article links to a book that makes the assertion of such findings but does not provide factual support of the findings. Megan thinks the source for this article, and others that covered the subject, is wrong and wants to refute them all. She tells Cueball ''Believe it or not'' which [[Black Hat]] hears and he immediately states that he believes her, and is convinced without hearing any arguments from Megan. He then decides to begin a Facebook page so he can ''tell the Internet'' without giving Megan a chance to explain any further.

"A hill to die on" is a phrase from {{w|Ernest Hemingway|Ernest Hemingway's}} 1940 novel "{{w|For Whom the Bell Tolls}}", about an American who volunteers in the 1936-1939 {{w|Spanish Civil War}} to fight {{w|fascism}}, who ends up wounded and alone, about to ambush the enemy to give his comrades a chance to escape; "a weird hill to die on" would thus mean a weird cause, if not a just one, to fight for to the bitter end. This expression is also the subject of [[2247: Weird Hill]]. Black Hat asserts that he needs such a cause because the "real" weird hills are too far from his house, humorously implying he would be equally satisfied with a literal weird hill.

Black Hat's actions are clearly premature since he has not heard any evidence to back up the claim and does not understand the nuances of Megan's position. Cueball states that it could have gone better, whereas Megan seems to be resigned to it, perhaps as it notionally supports her (aborted) argument and it's at least a short-term 'win' that she won't fuss over the details of.

Presumably, the best Black Hat can do would be to parrot what he has heard from Megan, without any understanding or critical thinking on his part. Due to his lack of understanding, he may even interject his own ideas (ones Megan never believed nor stated) into his posts. These are all consistent with him calling himself "pyramid honey truther". The word ''truther'' refers to people who reject established facts and instead choose to believe in conspiracies, like people who claim {{w|Moon landing conspiracy theories|the moon landings never happened}}, or {{w|9/11 Truth movement|believe the US government is behind}} the {{w|9/11 attacks}}. While a few conspiracy theories turn out to be true, most are easily proved to be fake, but this does not stop people from believing in them anyway, just like the two mentioned here, which are not easily dismissed by believers. This turns Megan, who likely has a reasonable and well-justified position, unwillingly into the source of conspiracy theories.

Alternatively, he only does this to troll Megan (and Cueball), and everyone else that reads his Facebook page, just because he knows they will get annoyed. And also to state that this is an unimportant subject (a weird hill to die on) to make such a fuss over. No one would wish to eat that honey, anyway, having been abandoned to time for that long. He may see this as a completely uninteresting subject and thus makes fun of Megan with his statements. This would also be more in line with his usual behavior.

It is also possible that Black Hat is simply mocking conspiracy theorists' obsessions with factually incorrect ideas, comparably to what may be the case in [[Secretary: Part 3]].

The title text refers to the {{w|Eye of Providence}}, a symbol of an eye at the top of a pyramid, found on US currency and often associated with conspiracy theories of the {{w|Illuminati}}. Black Hat again refers to the pyramid honey found under the pyramids and calls it a ''conspiracy that goes all the way to the top''. This usually means that the politicians (or the government agencies) ruling the country know about it, but keep it a secret from the public. But in this case, he mixes up terms and says it goes to the top of the pyramid (from the bottom), to where the giant eye is. As promised he also writes four words in all capital letters, shouting out the TRUTH!

This comic is likely a satire of the stereotypical internet mindset and plays up the frequent confusion between legitimate scientific skepticism, where unsupported claims are rejected, and conspiracy-theory faux-skepticism, where legitimate evidence is rejected because it does not support a specific viewpoint.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Megan are talking.]
:Cueball: Apparently honey has an infinite shelf life. They just found jars of it in the pyramids, still good.
:Megan: You know, I've heard that, and I don't think it's true.

:[Black hat enters.]
:Cueball: Really? Smithsonian magazine confirmed it.
:Megan: Believe it or not, I think their source is wrong.
:Black Hat: '''''I believe you.'''''

:[Megan has turned to Black Hat raising her hands.]
:Megan: See I read about the archaeologists who-
:Black Hat: I'm convinced. Gonna go to tell the internet.

:[Black Hat moved closer to Megan and Cueball.]
:Megan: Wait, are you sure? Let me explain why I-
:Black Hat: Don't need it. I've heard enough.

:[Zoom-in on Black Hat's head.]
:Black Hat: I've been looking for a weird hill to die on, and all the real ones are too far from my house.
:Black Hat: So this is mine. I'm now a pyramid honey truther.

:[Zoom back out. Black Hat starts walking left, pointing a finger up. Cueball and Megan turn to look after him.]
:Black Hat: Time to start a Facebook group and post a bunch of all-caps comments everywhere.
:Cueball: This could have gone better.
:Megan: Oh well.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Conspiracy theory]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Science]]

Talk:694: Retro Virus

2020-05-03T10:31:30Z

Zehka: Added meaningless comment

Edited to reflect that at the time referenced in the comic (2003), Windows XP machines were not necessarily "more susceptible" to viruses, but rather due to their ubiquity (especially at large corporations or other organizations) were more likely to be targeted by viruses. I'm certainly not an expert, so please if anyone has a better understanding, update or revert the explanation, as appropriate. [[User:Orazor|Orazor]] ([[User talk:Orazor|talk]]) 08:52, 11 June 2014 (UTC)

"Cleaning viruses in the Win32 API" is such a stupid statement... Gonna edit it later. [[Special:Contributions/141.101.89.217|141.101.89.217]] 13:28, 9 October 2014 (UTC)
: When, exactly, is "later"?[[User:Elektrizikekswerk|Elektrizikekswerk]] ([[User talk:Elektrizikekswerk|talk]]) 10:47, 11 December 2014 (UTC)
::When the prophets realise there is more to keeping Windows afloat than a cartel making hardware. Or do you imagine that moving to Adobe is a brilliant move on the part of US Intelligence.

::Ah... Let me rephrase that...
::There is no way on god's earth that Microsoft could have survived Vista without a lot of very well placed software makers shitting semicolons. Imagine the wave of panic that must have darkened the doorstep of every computer seller and manufacturer of Windows games and other software when it occurred to them it was Vista or Linux.

::If going back to school would have sucked for Windows users, think how the schools were reacting to the news.

[[User:Weatherlawyer| I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait]] ([[User talk:Weatherlawyer|talk]])

I predict the Linux Event date to be sometime in 2016. That's because I, a confirmed disbeliever in the usability of Linux (due to many attempts and no successes), have decided that the Linux community has matured enough and grown large enough to have created a distro that I can get working. I will be attempting this major breakthrough in the next 6 months or so. Please stand by. [[User:Jakee308|Jakee308]] ([[User talk:Jakee308|talk]]) 19:08, 8 June 2015 (UTC)
:Didn't happen. Linux just totally sucks. All the commands make no sense (If I hear 'sudo' one more time I will barf)
. Also Android is shit. {{unsigned ip|173.245.54.35}}
::IMO the commands make so much more sense than their Windows counterparts. And sudo (I don't care about your barf) is really simple, it's just "run this as admin". [[Special:Contributions/162.158.2.60|162.158.2.60]] 12:41, 8 December 2016 (UTC)
:You should try Fedora. Fedora is probably the best Linux distribution for GNOME. It's also the most up to date (while stable) distro. :) {{unsigned ip|108.162.238.90}}
:As much as I'd like that too, it's 2020 and that ist still very far from happening. Any new guesses, when it will happen? --[[User:Zehka|Zehka]] ([[User talk:Zehka|talk]]) 10:31, 3 May 2020 (UTC)

1717: Pyramid Honey

2020-01-29T16:09:17Z

Zehka: Added referrence to 2247

{{comic
| number = 1717
| date = August 8, 2016
| title = Pyramid Honey
| image = pyramid_honey.png
| titletext = They CLAIM honey was found in the chambers under the pyramids, but this conspiracy goes all the way to the TOP, where the GIANT EYE is!
}}

==Explanation==
Bee {{w|honey}} is a food item with natural antimicrobial properties. It can remain unspoiled for a person's entire lifetime, making it practically nonperishable for ordinary consumers. It is frequently claimed that archaeologists have found jars of honey that have been well-preserved for thousands of years in ancient tombs, often those found in {{w|Egyptian pyramids}}, hence the title ''Pyramid Honey''. The claims are generally assertions which may point to other similar assertions as supporting evidence but do not provide specific details, such as the identity of the actual tombs where such jars have been found, or the names of the archaeologists who have affirmed finding such jars. Repeated encounters with the assertion lead some people to claim that honey's shelf life is "infinite", which is a much stronger claim which would not necessarily be supported by the assertion even assuming it is true.

In the comic, [[Cueball]] tells [[Megan]] about an article in ''{{w|Smithsonian (magazine)|Smithsonian Magazine}}'' (presumably [http://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/the-science-behind-honeys-eternal-shelf-life-1218690/ this one]) that claims honey has an infinite shelf life. The article links to a book which makes the assertion of such findings but does not provide factual support of the findings. Megan thinks the sources of the article are wrong and wants to refute it. She tells Cueball ''Believe it or not'' which [[Black Hat]] hears and he immediately states that he believes her, and is convinced without hearing any arguments from Megan. He then decides to begin a Facebook page so he can ''tell the Internet'' without giving Megan a chance to explain any further.

"A hill to die on" is a phrase from {{w|Ernest Hemingway|Ernest Hemingway's}} 1940 novel "{{w|For Whom the Bell Tolls}}", about an American who volunteers in the 1936-1939 {{w|Spanish Civil War}} to fight {{w|fascism}}, who ends up wounded and alone, about to ambush the enemy to give his comrades a chance to escape; "a weird hill to die on" would thus mean a weird cause, if not a just one, to fight for to the bitter end. This expression is also the subject of [[2247:_Weird_Hill|XKCD 2247: Weird Hill]]. Black Hat asserts that he needs such a cause because the "real" weird hills are too far from his house, humorously implying he would be equally satisfied with a literal weird hill.

Black Hat's actions are clearly premature, since he has not heard any evidence to back up the claim and does not understand the nuances of Megan's position. Cueball states that it could have gone better, whereas Megan seems to be resigned to it, perhaps as it notionally supports her (aborted) argument and it's at least a short-term 'win' that she won't fuss over the details of.

Presumably, the best Black Hat can do would be to parrot what he has heard from Megan, without any understanding or critical thinking on his part. Due to his lack of understanding, he may even interject his own ideas (ones Megan never believed nor stated) into his posts. These are all consistent with him calling himself "pyramid honey truther". The word ''truther'' refers to people who reject established facts and instead choose to believe in conspiracies, like people who claim {{w|Moon landing conspiracy theories|the moon landings never happened}}, or {{w|9/11 Truth movement|believe the US government is behind}} the {{w|9/11 attacks}}. While a few conspiracy theories turn out to be true most are easily proved to be fake, but this does not stop people from believing in them anyway, just like the two mentioned here, which are not easily dismissed by believers. This turns Megan, who likely has a reasonable and well-justified position, unwillingly into the source of conspiracy theories.

Alternatively he only does this to troll Megan (and Cueball), and everyone else that reads his Facebook page, just because he knows they will get annoyed. And also to state that this is an unimportant subject (a weird hill to fight for) to make such a fuss over. No one would wish to eat that old honey anyway, or wish to keep it for that long, so he may see this as a completely uninteresting subject and thus makes fun of Megan with his statements. This would also be more in line with his usual behavior.

It is also possible that Black Hat is simply mocking conspiracy theorists' obsessions with factually incorrect ideas, comparably to what may be the case in [[Secretary: Part 3]].

The title text refers to the {{w|Eye of Providence}}, a symbol of an eye at the top of a pyramid, found on US currency and often associated with conspiracy theories of the {{w|Illuminati}}. Black Hat again refers to the pyramid honey found under the pyramids and calls it a ''conspiracy that goes all the way to the top''. This usually means that the politicians (or the government agencies) ruling the country know about it, but keep it a secret from the public. But in this case he mixes up terms and says it goes to the top of the pyramid (from the bottom), to where the giant eye is. As promised he also writes four words in all capital letters, shouting out the TRUTH!

This comic is likely a satire of the stereotypical internet mindset, and plays up the frequent confusion between legitimate scientific scepticism, where unsupported claims are rejected, and conspiracy-theory faux-scepticism, where legitimate evidence is rejected because it does not support a specific viewpoint.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball and Megan are talking.]
:Cueball: Apparently honey has an infinite shelf life. They just found jars of it in the pyramids, still good.
:Megan: You know, I've heard that, and I don't think its true.

:[Black hat enters.]
:Cueball: Really? Smithsonian magazine confirmed it.
:Megan: Believe it or not, I think their source is wrong.
:Black Hat: '''''I believe you.'''''

:[Megan has turned to Black Hat raising her hands.]
:Megan: See I read about the archeologists who-
:Black Hat: I'm convinced. Gonna go to tell the internet.

:[Black Hat moved closer to Megan and Cueball.]
:Megan: Wait, are you sure? Let me explain why I-
:Black Hat: Don't need it. I've heard enough.

:[Zoom-in on Black Hat's head.]
:Black Hat: I've been looking for a weird hill to die on, and all the real ones are too far from my house.
:Black Hat: So this is mine. I'm now a pyramid honey truther.

:[Zoom back out. Black Hat starts walking left, pointing a finger up. Cueball and Megan turns to look after him.]
:Black Hat: Time to start a Facebook group and post a bunch of all-caps comments everywhere.
:Cueball: This could have gone better.
:Megan: Oh well.

{{comic discussion}}
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Black Hat]]
[[Category:Conspiracy theory]]
[[Category:Food]]
[[Category:Science]]