533: Laptop Hell

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Laptop Hell
The xkcd.com sysadmin has a Q2010, and I can attest that it can handle a fall down several flights of concrete steps. Relatedly, he's upset with me - I hope he doesn't take revenge by messing with my site's contenDISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
Title text: The xkcd.com sysadmin has a Q2010, and I can attest that it can handle a fall down several flights of concrete steps. Relatedly, he's upset with me - I hope he doesn't take revenge by messing with my site's contenDISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS

Explanation

The Devil is greeting the new souls sentenced to Hell, and recognizes an executive from Fujitsu Ltd in the form of Hairbun. The Devil singles her out and comments that she caused his favorite laptop, the Fujitsu Q2010, to be taken out of production. The Devil is displeased because he thought it was a good laptop, just poorly marketed. The executive is confused and asks the Devil why it is upset, as acts of evil are generally encouraged by the Devil. The Devil explains that Hell uses laptops as well and the need for laptops is greater than the need to encourage evil works. Though, it later confesses, Hell has an exclusive deal with Fujitsu competitor, Sony.

This would explain why the sale of Fujitsu fantastic computer failed, and Hairbun also exclaims I knew it to indicate that she had suspected it was weird that Sony did so well. When you strike a deal with the Devil your affairs in life goes great, but of course you have then sold your soul to eternal damnation in Hell when you eventually dies. Seems like Sony has done so.

This comic is likely a wish fulfillment fantasy by Randall for the canceling of his favorite laptop, the Fujitsu Q2010. Exclusivity deals are typically thought ill of as they are bad for competition. Also since exclusivity deals solely benefit the provider, there are often reciprocal arrangement for the purchaser. This implies that the devil has influence at Sony. Likely Sony was chosen as the electronic distributor to hell because of the Sony rootkit scandal. This scandal inspired many to call Sony an evil company.

The title text explains that Randall's systems administrator is upset with him because he tested the systems administrators laptop by throwing it down several flights of steps. The systems admin is implied to have taken revenge childishly, by replacing part of the text with "DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS"

The "suck cocks" part is a reference to a post in bash.org which went on to attain moderate fame.

Transcript

[The Devil, bald head with horns, tail with arrow ending, a trident in one hand and a paper in the other hand is ready to welcome Hairbun to hell. Above the Devil there are three large stalactite hanging down and behind Hairbun there is one very large stalagmite and three small and also two small stalactites.]
Devil: Welcome to Hell. Here's—
Devil: Wait. I know you.
[Zoom in on the two, with white background. The Devils trident breaks the panels frame.]
Devil: You're the Fujitsu exec who killed the Q-series.
Hairbun: ...Yes?
Devil: The Q2010 was the perfect laptop!
[In this frame-less panel with white background. the Devil walks away from Hairbun trident pointing up and left. Hairbun throws her arms out to the side.]
Devil: Powerful, durable, had every feature, and made the Air look bulky. And that was back in 2006!
Hairbun: But no one bought it!
Devil: Then you marketed it wrong!
[The devil turns around towards Hairbun who both standing as in the first panel but still with white background.]
Hairbun: Wait. Don't you encourage evil acts down here?
Devil: In theory, yes, but we need laptops too!
Devil: Although it's moot, since we have an exclusive deal with Sony.
Hairbun: I knew it!


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Discussion

The alt text is a reference to a hilarious post in bash.org, which is at this moment the #12 in the top 100 list:

http://bash.org/?5775

http://bash.org/?top ‎113.119.86.124 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Only the devil is traditionally shown with a pitchfork. 108.162.217.89 15:05, 1 August 2014 (UTC)

Do you mean a trident? --Kynde (talk) 22:57, 22 July 2016 (UTC)

What's with the incomplete tag? This article has links to the wikipedia page for both devil and laptop. 108.162.238.155 05:38, 2 August 2014 (UTC)

"the smarter devil is a sony sales rep" What does this mean? 108.162.217.155 16:05, 2 August 2014 (UTC)

That Sony execs can ruin you computer and not have to reacall all their CDs so that you can buy the evil ones at car boot sales decades later.

I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait (talk) 19:06, 30 January 2015 (UTC)

Related: https://blog.xkcd.com/2009/02/11/a-math-problem/ -- jonas 141.101.96.40 14:33, 25 November 2020 (UTC)