Syndication

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Syndication
Now that xkcd is carried by United Features Syndicate, there are going to be a few changes to the comic. Obviously, with the rights signed over, it will no longer be published under Creative Commons, and all previous strips will be retroactively un-CC'd and relicensed under UFS terms. All online content will be protected via proprietary DRM. I also recieved a letter outlining topics and content that would be off-limits in the new xkcd. Prohibited content includes:

- Cultural references that would be lost on the average newspaper reader

- Mathematics above the high-school level

- Obscure scientific subjects

- Overt sexual material

- Objectionable words such as fuck, shit, cunt, ass, tits, cock, scrotum, bitch, Belgium, pussy, or twat

- Same-sex relationships

- Star Wars

- Star Trek (Original Series and Enterprise)

- The home phone numbers of White House employees

- Bacon-based currencies

- Erotic use of flywheels

- Exposés regarding other United Features syndicated characters

- Exposés regarding the personal lives of United Features Syndicate executives, specifically including CEO Kenneth Lowe

- Teledildonics

- Portrayals of Johnny Cash as an Amway distributor

- Any story that ends with "and that's how my penis got the nickname 'grappling hook'."

- Computer-computer cybersex

- Swordfights between white people

- Bitch & Animal

- Sexualization of Mt. Rushmore

- Staplers as mélée weapons

- Road trip buddy comedies starring Tank Girl and William Howard Taft

- Eric S. Raymond performing in Cirque du Soleil

- Hats with buckles

- Licking of nipples atop a moving train

The internet is the past. Newspapers are the future! See you in the funny papers.
Complaints should be directed to the xkcd writing staff.
Title text: Complaints should be directed to the xkcd writing staff.

Explanation

Ambox notice.png This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Someone else write the explanation, I don't feel like it.
If you can address this issue, please edit the page! Thanks.

Transcript

[A Cueball and his Cueball-like friend are standing in some sort of grassy area.]
Cueball: Why did the computer cross the road?
Friend: I don't know.
Cueball: I don't know either! Computers are so complicated!
Friend: LOL!
Editor's note: "LOL" is an online acronym for "laughing out loud." It alerts you to something funny, so keep an eye out!


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Discussion

Where is this coming from? was this actually online in 2007? Between comics 242 and 243? --Lupo (talk) 08:08, 18 November 2019 (UTC)

Can we discuss the jokes in this comic, like Belgium jokingly being considered a swear word?108.162.216.196 20:12, 22 November 2019 (UTC)

I think we should. :) You are free to start a list of the items, to explain them, or a discussion here in the discussion page.

Alright, nobody has touched this for quite a while now, so I might as well. I kinda expected this page to be finished, but it is amazingly not so. 172.68.47.234 09:50, 27 December 2019 (UTC)

Hello, it is I again. I have something on my mind. I believe this comic never really was a thing. I will lay out everything I know. The link to the original comic at the top is broken and returns a 404 error. I cannot for the life of me find anything on this comic on Google other than a lone post on the xkcd forums, which could just as well have been posted in either 2007 or 2019, but I can't check because the forums are down. As well, it is odd that this explain xkcd page only came into existence 12 years after the comic was purportedly posted. Taking all of this into account, I have reason to believe that this entire thing has been a fabrication, i.e. that this was made in 2019 by a fan. I'd try to gather more concrete evidence for this, but that's where I run into a dead end. I have no idea how to proceed. I know of exactly one person who could settle this conclusively, which is Randall Munroe himself, but I imagine he has more important things to do. If any of you could prove/disprove my theory, that would be great. In the meantime, sure, I'll just assume this comic did actually get published in 2007. 172.69.34.168 10:34, 27 December 2019 (UTC)
The link does work, it just has an extra '/' at the end. I agree though that there's still something a bit different about the comic to others published at a similar time. The image looks like it's been copied out of a newspaper (although this might be deliberate) and having such a lengthy section of text outside of the comic is unusual. Google claims that the forum post dates from 1st April 2007, but in the absence of any other reference on the main site my guess is that this only appeared on the forums. AlChemist (talk) 20:55, 31 December 2019 (UTC)
Someone may try to find it on a wayback machine or something like that? Never used any of those archives and don't really know how they work... --Lupo (talk) 08:07, 6 February 2020 (UTC)
It's on the Wayback Machine, as early as April 9, 2007, but the link is just to the image - no text or anything (https://web.archive.org/web/20070409101227/https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/xkcd_ufs.jpg/). 162.158.187.69 02:01, 30 April 2020 (UTC)
Follow-up - here's the link to the XKCD forum post: https://web.archive.org/web/20070408135356/http://forums.xkcd.com/viewtopic.php?t=3701. Unfortunately, the link to the actual comic as posted on xkcd is extremely elusive. Many references to the comic are in the (now offline) XKCD fora - one of the few others I could find lists different lead-in text: https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/17980/a-visit-to-the-pranktologist-april-fools-day-thread/p13. 162.158.187.69 02:31, 30 April 2020 (UTC)

I switched the big table to a format that is more readable on smaller screens, as per the Editor FAQ §3, and added some more explanations in the process. Hope that's in everyone's interest. I also fixed up the broken Unicode (at first, I thought it was part of The Joke, but it is also correct in the archived forum thread.) -- //gir.st/ (talk) 22:19, 7 May 2020 (UTC)

Question: do we really need to explain every. single. one. of those items? the ones that are missing all fall into the "this is funny because it's random" (see also: 1210) category, imo. -- //gir.st/ (talk) 22:19, 7 May 2020 (UTC)

Some of them definitely do. I'd never heard of Tank Girl before I read this comic, and while linking to the Wikipedia article is nice it would be useful to have info relevant to the comic in the explanation. Also, side note - what's so random about hats with buckles? Some baseball caps I've worn had buckles instead of Velcro for adjusting them to fit your head. I assume that they're referring to stereotypical depictions of Puritans and leprechauns with giant buckles on their hats, but what's so weird about that? 162.158.186.186 19:19, 10 May 2020 (UTC)
i think the "hats with buckles" refer to belt buckles on hats (random internet image). and its "haha, so random" in the sense that there is no connection to the comic itself. if you can come up with something more concrete, go for it, but i honestly doubt there's more behind it. -- //gir.st/ (talk) 16:05, 12 May 2020 (UTC)