Editing 1679: Substitutions 3
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==Explanation== | ==Explanation== | ||
− | This is the third | + | {{incomplete|just a stub. More examples from real life. Title text...}} |
+ | This is the third time [[Randall]] has suggested substitutions that will make reading the news more fun. This time it will be '''even''' more fun. It began with [[1288: Substitutions]] which was followed more recently by [[1625: Substitutions 2]]. | ||
− | The | + | The title text in original form would be "Scientists explore ancient city", which most would consider a fairly bland headline. Imagining Channing Tatum and his "friends", and pretending that the city is haunted, provides a much more dramatic setting mirroring many episodes (and later films) of ''Scooby Doo'' featuring a gang of friends (Mysteries, Inc.). |
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− | + | Real life examples: | |
− | + | *Remains to be seen ➜ Will never be known | |
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− | *Remains to be seen ➜ Will never be known | ||
**[http://english.cri.cn/12394/2016/04/30/4203s926079.htm Japan's Sincerity in Improving Bilateral Ties Will Never Be Known] | **[http://english.cri.cn/12394/2016/04/30/4203s926079.htm Japan's Sincerity in Improving Bilateral Ties Will Never Be Known] | ||
*Cautiously optimistic ➜ Delusional | *Cautiously optimistic ➜ Delusional | ||
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* Tension ➜ Sexual Tension; Meeting ➜ Ménage à Trois | * Tension ➜ Sexual Tension; Meeting ➜ Ménage à Trois | ||
**[http://townhall.com/tipsheet/cortneyobrien/2016/05/09/2016-race-roundup-tension-between-trumpryan-ahead-of-thursday-meeting-n2160407 Sexual Tension Between Trump-Ryan Ahead of Thursday Ménage à Trois] | **[http://townhall.com/tipsheet/cortneyobrien/2016/05/09/2016-race-roundup-tension-between-trumpryan-ahead-of-thursday-meeting-n2160407 Sexual Tension Between Trump-Ryan Ahead of Thursday Ménage à Trois] | ||
− | *Gaffe ➜ Magic Spell | + | *Gaffe ➜ Magic Spell |
**[http://www.theguardian.com/politics/blog/2016/may/11/david-cameron-corruption-remark-gaffe Was David Cameron's corruption remark really a magic spell?] | **[http://www.theguardian.com/politics/blog/2016/may/11/david-cameron-corruption-remark-gaffe Was David Cameron's corruption remark really a magic spell?] | ||
− | *Ancient ➜ Haunted | + | *Ancient ➜ Haunted |
**[http://gizmodo.com/teen-discovers-lost-maya-city-using-ancient-star-maps-1775735999 Teen Discovers Lost Maya City Using Haunted Star Maps] | **[http://gizmodo.com/teen-discovers-lost-maya-city-using-ancient-star-maps-1775735999 Teen Discovers Lost Maya City Using Haunted Star Maps] | ||
− | *Star-Studded ➜ Blood-Soaked | + | *Star-Studded ➜ Blood-Soaked |
**[http://ewn.co.za/2016/05/11/Woody-Allen-tops-bill-at-star-studded-Cannes-festival Woody Allen tops bill at blood-soaked Cannes Festival] | **[http://ewn.co.za/2016/05/11/Woody-Allen-tops-bill-at-star-studded-Cannes-festival Woody Allen tops bill at blood-soaked Cannes Festival] | ||
*Subway system ➜ Tunnels I found | *Subway system ➜ Tunnels I found | ||
**[http://pix11.com/2016/05/09/dhs-releasing-harmless-gas-in-nyc-subway-system-to-test-bioterror-airflow/ DHS releasing harmless gas in NYC tunnels I found to prepare for possible attack] | **[http://pix11.com/2016/05/09/dhs-releasing-harmless-gas-in-nyc-subway-system-to-test-bioterror-airflow/ DHS releasing harmless gas in NYC tunnels I found to prepare for possible attack] | ||
− | *Surprising ➜ Surprising (but not to me) | + | *Surprising ➜ Surprising (but not to me) |
**[http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2016/05/11/476198119/a-surprising-japanese-presence-in-central-ohio A Surprising (But Not to Me) Japanese Presence In Central Ohio] | **[http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2016/05/11/476198119/a-surprising-japanese-presence-in-central-ohio A Surprising (But Not to Me) Japanese Presence In Central Ohio] | ||
− | *War of Words ➜ Interplanetary War | + | *War of Words ➜ Interplanetary War |
**[http://www.thehindu.com/news/cities/Coimbatore/road-caves-in-leading-to-war-of-words-between-aiadmk-and-dmk/article8577830.ece Road caves in leading to interplanetary war between AIADMK and DMK] | **[http://www.thehindu.com/news/cities/Coimbatore/road-caves-in-leading-to-war-of-words-between-aiadmk-and-dmk/article8577830.ece Road caves in leading to interplanetary war between AIADMK and DMK] | ||
− | *Tension ➜ Sexual Tension | + | *Tension ➜ Sexual Tension |
**[http://allafrica.com/stories/201605111244.html Uganda: Use Swearing-in to Ease Sexual Tension] | **[http://allafrica.com/stories/201605111244.html Uganda: Use Swearing-in to Ease Sexual Tension] | ||
− | *Doctor Who ➜ The Big Bang Theory | + | *Doctor Who ➜ The Big Bang Theory |
**[http://www.themarysue.com/doctor-who-trans-identity/ On The Big Bang Theory and My Struggle With My Trans Identity] | **[http://www.themarysue.com/doctor-who-trans-identity/ On The Big Bang Theory and My Struggle With My Trans Identity] | ||
*Win votes ➜ Find Pokémon | *Win votes ➜ Find Pokémon | ||
**[http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/14479510.Jeremy_Corbyn_must_urgently_develop_strategy_to_win_votes__warns_failed_leadership_candidate_Yvette_Cooper/ Labour's Jeremy Corbyn must urgently develop strategy to find Pokémon, warns failed leadership candidate Yvette Cooper] | **[http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/14479510.Jeremy_Corbyn_must_urgently_develop_strategy_to_win_votes__warns_failed_leadership_candidate_Yvette_Cooper/ Labour's Jeremy Corbyn must urgently develop strategy to find Pokémon, warns failed leadership candidate Yvette Cooper] | ||
− | *Behind the headlines ➜ Beyond the grave | + | *Behind the headlines ➜ Beyond the grave |
**[http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/411443/behind-the-headlines-the-erev-pesach-story-we-all-should-be-talking-about.html Beyond the Grave: The Erev Pesach Story We All Should Be Talking About] | **[http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/news/headlines-breaking-stories/411443/behind-the-headlines-the-erev-pesach-story-we-all-should-be-talking-about.html Beyond the Grave: The Erev Pesach Story We All Should Be Talking About] | ||
− | *Email / Facebook Post / Tweet ➜ Poem | + | *Email / Facebook Post / Tweet ➜ Poem |
**[http://www.cbsnews.com/news/wtae-anchor-and-reporter-wendy-bell-apologizes-for-facebook-post-that-could-be-viewed-as-racist/ TV anchor admits poem about fatal shooting "could be viewed as racist"] | **[http://www.cbsnews.com/news/wtae-anchor-and-reporter-wendy-bell-apologizes-for-facebook-post-that-could-be-viewed-as-racist/ TV anchor admits poem about fatal shooting "could be viewed as racist"] | ||
− | *Facebook CEO ➜ This guy | + | *Facebook CEO ➜ This guy |
**[http://hotair.com/archives/2016/05/10/senator-thune-demands-answers-from-facebook-about-news-bias/ Senator Thune demands answers from this guy about news bias] | **[http://hotair.com/archives/2016/05/10/senator-thune-demands-answers-from-facebook-about-news-bias/ Senator Thune demands answers from this guy about news bias] | ||
− | *Latest ➜ Final | + | *Latest ➜ Final |
**[http://www.engadget.com/2016/05/11/garmin-forerunner-735xt-running-watch/ Garmin's final running watch tracks your suffering] | **[http://www.engadget.com/2016/05/11/garmin-forerunner-735xt-running-watch/ Garmin's final running watch tracks your suffering] | ||
− | *Disrupt ➜ Destroy | + | *Disrupt ➜ Destroy |
**[https://news.fastcompany.com/amazon-thinks-it-can-disrupt-youtube-4006719 Amazon thinks it can destroy YouTube] | **[https://news.fastcompany.com/amazon-thinks-it-can-disrupt-youtube-4006719 Amazon thinks it can destroy YouTube] | ||
− | *Scientists ➜ Channing Tatum and his friends | + | *Scientists ➜ Channing Tatum and his friends |
**[http://www.futurity.org/memory-acetylcholine-ptsd-1159862-2/ Channing Tatum and his friends test a way to erase scary memories] | **[http://www.futurity.org/memory-acetylcholine-ptsd-1159862-2/ Channing Tatum and his friends test a way to erase scary memories] | ||
− | *You won't believe ➜ I'm really sad about | + | *You won't believe ➜ I'm really sad about |
**[http://www.komando.com/happening-now/357958/iphone-7-rumor-you-wont-believe-what-it-looks-like iPhone 7 rumor: I'm really sad about what it looks like] | **[http://www.komando.com/happening-now/357958/iphone-7-rumor-you-wont-believe-what-it-looks-like iPhone 7 rumor: I'm really sad about what it looks like] | ||
==Transcript== | ==Transcript== | ||
:[Caption above the panel:] | :[Caption above the panel:] | ||
− | :Even More | + | :Even More |
:<big>'''Substitutions'''</big> | :<big>'''Substitutions'''</big> | ||
:That make reading the news more fun | :That make reading the news more fun | ||
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|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Gaffe | | style="text-align:right;" | Gaffe | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Magic spell | | Magic spell | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Ancient | | style="text-align:right;" | Ancient | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Haunted | | Haunted | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Star-Studded | | style="text-align:right;" | Star-Studded | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Blood-soaked | | Blood-soaked | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Remains to be seen | | style="text-align:right;" | Remains to be seen | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Will never be known | | Will never be known | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Silver bullet | | style="text-align:right;" | Silver bullet | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Way to kill werewolves | | Way to kill werewolves | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Subway system | | style="text-align:right;" | Subway system | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Tunnels I found | | Tunnels I found | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Surprising | | style="text-align:right;" | Surprising | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Surprising (but not to me) | | Surprising (but not to me) | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | War of words | | style="text-align:right;" | War of words | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Interplanetary war | | Interplanetary war | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Tension | | style="text-align:right;" | Tension | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Sexual tension | | Sexual tension | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Cautiously optimistic | | style="text-align:right;" | Cautiously optimistic | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Delusional | | Delusional | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Doctor Who | | style="text-align:right;" | Doctor Who | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| The Big Bang Theory | | The Big Bang Theory | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Win votes | | style="text-align:right;" | Win votes | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Find Pokémon | | Find Pokémon | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Behind the headlines | | style="text-align:right;" | Behind the headlines | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Beyond the grave | | Beyond the grave | ||
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| style="text-align:right;" | Facebook Post | | style="text-align:right;" | Facebook Post | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Poem | | Poem | ||
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| style="text-align:right;" | Facebook CEO | | style="text-align:right;" | Facebook CEO | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| This guy | | This guy | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Latest | | style="text-align:right;" | Latest | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Final | | Final | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Disrupt | | style="text-align:right;" | Disrupt | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Destroy | | Destroy | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Meeting | | style="text-align:right;" | Meeting | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Ménage à trois | | Ménage à trois | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | Scientists | | style="text-align:right;" | Scientists | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| Channing Tatum<br> and his friends | | Channing Tatum<br> and his friends | ||
|- | |- | ||
| style="text-align:right;" | You won't believe | | style="text-align:right;" | You won't believe | ||
− | | ➜ | + | | ➜ |
| I'm really sad about | | I'm really sad about | ||
|} | |} | ||
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{{comic discussion}} | {{comic discussion}} | ||
− | [[Category: | + | [[Category:Charts]] |
+ | [[Category:Substitutions]] | ||
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Substitutions]] | [[Category:Comics sharing name|Substitutions]] | ||
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[[Category:Language]] | [[Category:Language]] | ||
[[Category:Science]] | [[Category:Science]] | ||
[[Category:Politics]] | [[Category:Politics]] | ||
+ | [[Category:Comics featuring real people]] <!--Channing Tatum--> | ||
[[Category:Pokémon]] | [[Category:Pokémon]] | ||
− |