1763: Catcalling

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Catcalling

Title text: Effect strength => [unstoppable] / Effect range => [2 miles] / Effect duration => [1 year]

Explanation

"Catcalling" refers to the act of whistling or shouting to attract the attention of an attractive woman, and often carries connotations of harassment. Annoyed by this practice, Megan alters the Universal Control Console to create a setting in which catcalling actually attracts cats (as the name implies), thus resulting in the catcaller being harassed by the overwhelming feline presence, instead of the other way around, likely in an attempt to discourage the act.

The "Universal Control Console" was introduced in 1620: Christmas Settings as the "Universe Control Panel", where it was used to control aspects of reality related to Christmas. Based on the name, it is presumed all aspects of reality could be altered using this fictitious device, though it's hard to imagine a user interface that could handle such an infinite number of options.

Transcript

[(Voice from off-screen) "Hey! Are you messing with the Universal Control Console!?" Megan: (standing at a podium, there is a small lever and what appears to be a computer screen) "It's cool. Just gotta fix one thing."]

[Megan still at the podium; now a mouse pointer appears]

[Megan still at the podium; "Catcalling" appears written at the top of the panel above a dropdown menu that says "Harasses women"; the pointer is hovering over the arrow]

[Megan still at the podium; The dropdown menu is expanded to show two elements: "Harasses women" and "Attracts cats". The pointer is hovering over "Attracts cats", which is highlighted]

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Discussion

Is it just me or wouldn't this fail if the misogynists also were cat-lovers? 141.101.98.224 15:16, 23 November 2016 (UTC)

I doubt even cat-lovers would enjoy being swarmed by a hopeless amount of cats for an entire year. 162.158.74.36 15:51, 23 November 2016 (UTC

You underestimate some peoples' love of cats. Hppavilion1 (talk) 03:08, 13 May 2017 (UTC)

>"Misogyny" 108.162.245.51 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

The way I originally read this, in addition to wanting to stop getting harassed, Megan also just liked cats and wanted an easy way to gather them. 172.68.55.71 15:56, 23 November 2016 (UTC)

My initial thought: Awww! Maybe by being confronted to care for neighborhood cats, such "men" might learn how to love and care for creatures who only want to exploit them, like said men do with women. That could work! ...And then I read the title text. --BigMal // 162.158.74.36 16:52, 23 November 2016 (UTC)

To be sure, it is an astonishing feat to invent some mention of specifically men that is apparently present in the comic but which us mere mortals could never comprehend. 108.162.215.170 20:45, 21 October 2020 (UTC)

Catcalling now attracts my friend Catherine. Int (talk) 17:00, 23 November 2016 (UTC)

Did we know Megan was a lefty? jameslucas (" " / +) 18:18, 23 November 2016 (UTC)

I imagine this comic is Randall Munroe making a statement. He has clearly demonstrated himself as left-leaning on numerous occasions. 172.69.34.140 09:49, 25 August 2020 (UTC)

The big question is... does it attract bobcats? --172.68.54.123 21:30, 23 November 2016 (UTC)

The cursor might not be left handed, rather, we might just be on the other side of the screen, eh? NotLock (talk) 07:40, 24 November 2016 (UTC)

I was thinking the same thing, but dismissed the idea because the text ("Catcalling", "Attracts cats", etc) isn't similarly mirrored. The drop-down menu itself usually has its arrow-thingy on the right, though... Hmm... Maplestrip (talk) 11:22, 24 November 2016 (UTC)

Maybe comic characters read in mirror-text! 162.158.165.176 23:23, 24 November 2016 (UTC)

Occam seems to have lost his razor. Int (talk) 16:53, 4 December 2016 (UTC)

I'm pretty sure the part about the title text being perl is wrong. It's definitely not perl5, because things like [2 miles] are not valid syntax at all. This might be perl6 with syntax I don't know, but I doubt it, since the square brackets would indicate something like an array rather than a single element: [2 miles] would then mean "2" and "miles" separately, which doesn't make much sense. 173.245.49.75 09:23, 24 November 2016 (UTC)

I agree, it looks much more like trying to indicate text fields in a ASCII string. 162.158.69.142 12:20, 24 November 2016 (UTC)

Seems to me those are just freakin' arrows indicating changing those settings. -- Jacky720 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

I read each "=>" in the title text as meaning "equal or greater than". Which is horrifying when you think about it. These Are Not The Comments You Are Looking For (talk) 06:23, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Effect strength is unstoppable OR GREATER.--108.162.237.40 16:45, 27 November 2016 (UTC)

Wouldn't this very quickly result in the extinction of all cats, as they are forced to rush from one chauvinist to another, unable to escape long enough to eat or sleep? >Jesper 141.101.105.40 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Catpocalypse! --188.114.111.116 17:41, 7 December 2016 (UTC)

FYI The Universe Control Panel was used to alter the meaning of Catpocalypse. --188.114.111.116 17:47, 7 December 2016 (UTC)

Why do you assume that Megan thinks that catcalling is harassing women? Maybe she is tired of women who get harassed by it, when in fact there is no point to. 162.158.150.140 15:03, 4 December 2016 (UTC)

Does this change also apply to catcalling that is directed at men? If not, that certainly seems a bit sexist to exempt one gender from street harassment but not the other. 162.158.79.29 21:56, 18 January 2017 (UTC)

I was going to point that out. Maybe it isn't catcalling when it's men? Maybe it has a different name, and she already adjusted that panel? Hppavilion1 (talk) 03:08, 13 May 2017 (UTC)

I am ashamed that I first thought Megan wants to correct the meaning of the word, and not the consequences of the thing. Meanwhile I came across a public campaign that explains the issue. You never stop learning. --172.70.243.151 07:48, 18 May 2023 (UTC)