1274: Open Letter

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Open Letter
Are you ok? Do you need help?
Title text: Are you ok? Do you need help?

Explanation

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Under some circumstances, the United States Federal Government can temporarily shut down pending budget legislation from the United States Congress. These shutdowns are typically due to political disagreements between the President, the House of Representatives, and the Senate.

Over the years, various conspiracy theories have been proposed claiming that the United States Government is not controlled by publicly-elected officials, but rather by one or more organizations that secretly control the actions of the government (sometimes termed a "shadow government").

Randall jokes on the US government shutdown in 2013, that has been ongoing for a week and is still current as of the time of this comic, by writing a letter to the shadow government, telling them that this situation is embarrassing and asking them to fix the problem.

This comic may also be subtly arguing against the plausibility of the aforementioned conspiracy theories if one assumes that a shadow-controlled government would be more likely to operate with a singular purpose and therefore be less susceptible to paralyzing political disagreements. That is to say, if an outside organization were controlling the US government, then it would demonstrate more competence than the US government is currently exhibiting. Randall previously alluded to this in the title text to comic 1081: "Really, the comforting side in most conspiracy theory arguments is the one claiming that anyone who's in power has any plan at all." This is one of several comics in which Randall expresses dismay at how many intelligent people can fall for absurd conspiracy theories; see comics 258 and 690, among others.

The title text plaintively asks if the conspiracy masters are experiencing some sort of personal problem that is interfering with their ability to smoothly run the government from behind the scenes.

Addressee Brief Description
The Freemasons Fraternity claiming the legacy of medieval stonemasons. Organised in local groups, the so called Lodges.
Illuminati Secret society formed in Bavaria to further the ideas of enlightenment. Although officially banned in 1785, many conspiracy theorists believe the organisation might have survived and is still secretly exerting influence.
Scientology Self-proclaimed church founded by science-fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard. Often criticised for alleged brainwashing of its members and accused of hiding commercial interests behind religious claims.
FEMA Agency of the United States Department of homeland security, that has been granted extensive authorisations in cases of emergency and is therefore believed to act as an entity independent of governmental control.
The New World Order Not a secret organisation itself, but rather the concept of establishing a totalitarian system controlled by any elitist group in this list.
The Federal Reserve Central state bank system of the United States, therefore to some degree able to control the monetary circulation of the US Dollar.
Citigroup one of the largest multinational banks, most of which are rumored to have nefarious purposes.
Halliburton one of the largest government contractors, formerly run by Dick Cheney.
Google one of the largest DotCom corporations. Google's public motto is "don't be evil". The idea of secret plans of Google has been mentioned in comic 792.
The Vatican The Pope and his inner circle, who control the Roman Catholic Church. The Church was a major political power in Western Europe before the rise of secularism, and still wields considerable influence.
Bilderburg A informal group that meets every year to talk freely. Many politicians, firm-owners, famous artist and important media were invited in the past.
Walmart the largest retail superstore, not above using bribery to get its way.
The Rothschilds Family of Jewish financiers that was later elevated into European nobility. Believed to exercise influence through considerable wealth.
The Knights Templar
HAARP
The UN
Skull & Bones a secret society at Yale. Both George W Bush and John Kerry are members.
Bohemian Grove
The Koch Brothers Two wealthy brothers who provide funding to conservative causes and are a frequently-cited bugaboo among liberals.
George Soros A wealthy financier who provides funding to liberal causes and is a frequently-cited bugaboo among conservatives.
The Knights of Malta
The CFR
Exxon Mobil
The Zionists Zionism is the political movement favoring the creation of a Jewish homeland, a goal achieved with the creation of the state of Israel. In a conspiracy-theory context, it references the belief that wealthy and powerful Jews (such as the above-referenced Rothschilds) control political and social institutions.
The Vril Society
The Lizard People secret snake-men, similar to the aliens from V (TV series).
and everyone else who secretly controls the US Government

Transcript

[The picture shows a letter.]
October 7th 2013
To: The Freemasons, the Illuminati, Scientology, FEMA, the New World Order, the Federal Reserve, Citigroup, Halliburton, Google, the Vatican, Bilderburg, Walmart, the Rothschilds, the Knights Templar, HAARP, the UN, Skull & Bones, Bohemian Grove, the Koch Brothers, George Soros, the Trilateral Commision, the Knights of Malta, the CFR, Exxon Mobil, the Zionists, the Vril Society, the Lizard People, and everyone else who secretly controls the US government
Can you please get your shit together?
This is embarrassing.
Sincerely,
A Concerned Citizen


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Discussion

If you believe in a shadow government, it seems likely that you would actually see a goverment shutdown as part of the conspiracy. 108.13.108.44 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Is this another shadow fact? http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/index.php?title=1272 --MauroVan (talk) 09:33, 7 October 2013 (UTC)
Actually, theoretically speaking, a government shutdown would be part of the conspiracy. Think about it. If there was a shadow government, then the only thing that can stop them is the people uniting against them. So, in order to keep the people from finding out, you would have to destroy their unity. And, unity in the US is at an all time low with people vehemently fighting amongst themselves. So, I don't think that the argument in this strip is valid. An orchestrated chaos would certainly be a tool of a shadow government. Theoretically speaking, of course. Kwyjibo (talk) 20:13, 9 October 2013 (UTC)

I guess Randal is only right as long there is only ONE group involved ;-). --DaB. (talk) 11:01, 7 October 2013 (UTC)

Randall knows exactly which group is in control, but has been forced by them to leave their name completely off of the aforementioned list. 178.98.212.190 13:25, 7 October 2013 (UTC)

I removed the words 'Self-proclaimed' from the description of Scientology. It's so vague to be meaningless. Aren't most religions and churches self-proclaimed? Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, etc all started with somebody claiming secret knowledge. It should either be applied to all religions, or none.154.20.80.41 13:50, 7 October 2013 (UTC)

Is "Sincerely, A Concerned Citizen" really a Half-Life 2 reference? The phrase is generic enough that it actually appears before Half-Life 2 was released (example). --75.119.250.35 15:21, 7 October 2013 (UTC)

Agreed, people have been using the "Concerned Citizen" phrasing for years. Mattflaschen (talk) 17:41, 7 October 2013 (UTC)
It's not just the wording, but the context, so it does seem to be a reference. 108.13.108.44 18:22, 7 October 2013 (UTC)
The context being that of somebody concerned about their government? That seems a wee bit broad to be a contextual reference.154.20.80.41 03:01, 8 October 2013 (UTC)

Wow! The actual group secretly running the government is so powerful they had themselves removed from the explanation table, apparently! (There's no Trilateral Commission entry right now.) Imperpay (talk) 16:29, 7 October 2013 (UTC)

Fixed. :) Mattflaschen (talk) 17:41, 7 October 2013 (UTC)

No mention of what an open letter is? 76.106.251.87 04:08, 8 October 2013 (UTC)

I just added something. It got wordy. Probably could be improved (and/or wiki-link to at least their page on Open Letters). But it's there, FWIW. 178.98.212.190 13:36, 9 October 2013 (UTC)

Seems he left off Monsanto (according to the hippie types I hang around for some reason, they're running the entire world). Who else was left off the list? 108.162.221.53 19:49, 7 November 2013 (UTC)MR

...the Mafia. Greyson (talk) 02:28, 17 June 2014 (UTC)

Really? The Knights of Malta read xkcd? Djbrasier (talk) 18:20, 31 March 2015 (UTC)

The Lizards may be a reference to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: "I come in peace. Take me to your lizard" Ford Prefect explains here:

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/162557-it-comes-from-a-very-ancient-democracy-you-see-you 162.158.34.148 18:17, 6 November 2015 (UTC)

inter dimensional guardian of life here. the illuminati does not control the U. S. government. right now. -- Overlord of oddities (talk) 21:05, 27 January 2020 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

Okay, I just gotta say that this hits differently after the last two years. 162.158.107.230 18:19, 7 June 2022 (UTC)

Differently good or differently bad? It could be either way, depending on personal perspective/suspicions/conspiratorialisations.
(And moved your thing down to the bottom, so it's properly chronologically.) 172.69.79.173 21:10, 7 June 2022 (UTC)

THIS COMIC MAKES NO SENSE Z1mp0st0rz (talk) 19:47, 15 April 2024 (UTC)

Does the Explanation not explain it? What part does not make sense for you? (And why are you adding ALLCAPS comments to so many comic Talk pages..? You're new here, we know, but it's distracting.) 172.69.195.54 13:22, 16 April 2024 (UTC)

infinitely relevant. youtu.be/miLcaqq2Zpk 17:14, 19 June 2024 (UTC)

is it the bit about zionists? 172.69.79.138 13:14, 9 July 2024 (UTC)