2871: Definitely

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Definitely

Title text: A really mean prank you can play on someone who's picky about words is to add a 'definitely->definitively' autocorrect rule to their keyboard.

Explanation

This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Created by a DEFINITE BOT FAILURE - Please change this comment when editing this page. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. If you can address this issue, please edit the page! Thanks.

The word definitely is commonly misspelt, perhaps because it may be voiced as "def-in-ATE-ly", or with other vowels/emphisis. (The wiktionary link mentions three, /ˈdɛf.ɪ.nɪt.li/, /ˈdɛf.ə.nɪt.li/, /ˈdɛf.nɪt.li/, which suggest differences other than those that this editor is colloquially most familiar with.) Remembering that it ultimately has a common root with "finite" does not help when you also perhaps link it to "define" (and not "definition").

The comic gives twelve 'words' that the subtitle claims are all real, and gives their definitions, whereas in reality only the first (the definitel definitive spelling of "definitely" and the last (defying the trend by being the actual word defiantly) are indeed so.

The first three alternate 'words' listed do have Wiktionary entries that indicate they are common mis-spellings of the first, and the last has a secondary 'meaning' of possibly being such an error, but (as of the publication of this comic/edit) the words "defenitely", "defintely", "definetely", "definantly", "defanitely", "defineatly" and "definitly" are so wrong that they don't even have a corrective article created for them. Some of them don't even look like they'd even be sufficiently homophonic substitutes, though the actions of accent and dialect may indeed be capable of creating compatible (mis)elocutions for each.

The title text adds to the word confusion by suggesting that the (real) word definitively be made to be used (against the will of a word-wise individual) as a substitution for original definitely definitive spelling. In certain contexts it even fulfils the same basic sense as the original and so could even survive proofreading by a third party. Or even the author glancing through their own work, and the brain not twigging the increased number of riser-rich characters but mentally voicing the intended word anyway...

Transcript

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Word   Meaning

Definitely - Definitely

Definetly - Almost definitely

Definately - Probably

Definatly - Probably not

Defenitely - Not telling (it's a surprise)

Defintely - Per the prophecy

Definetely - Definitely, maybe

Definantly - To be decided by coin toss

Defanitely - In one universe out of 14 million

Defineatly - Only the gods know

Definitly - Unless someone cute shows up

Defiantly - Defiantly

[Caption below the panel:]

People think the word "definitely" is often misspelled, but it's actually just several words with different meanings.

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Discussion

Regrettably for someone who has mild dyslexia, and with it in All Caps, I have difficulty seeing the subtleties of the spellings. RIIW - Ponder it (talk) 09:08, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

Seems intentional; it would be less funny if the typos were more obvious?

ProphetZarquon (talk) 13:40, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

I have defiantly left this typo as-is, on purpose, before. ProphetZarquon (talk) 13:40, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

I buffed up the Explanation (basically replaced it, the editor-suggestions for 'other not-wrong-honest spellings' didn't fit. Maybe I should transplant that down here as a game for us all to play 'aside' from any Explain). Some phrasing or language I can see being ripe for going under the scalpel/wrecking-ball of the next editor to arrive here, but I think it's a decent framework that covers most of the points. Just the one thing I nearly added, but left off, was actually going into the various Word-Meaning pairs. I can imagine why some of the Meanings are used (seem to have a sense that aligns with the letter-jumble that makes the Word wrong), but not enough to do a full table about it (as an obvious attempt at over-analysis). But if anyone else has a yen to do so then... Just remember that I thought of it first. ;) 141.101.99.59 16:14, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

You beat me to it. I was unable to ascertain any way to link clues in the misspellings to the meanings assigned to them, and I think that the meanings were haphazardly, even absurdly, assigned. 162.158.186.248 16:28, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

Not sure whether or not this merits a table, but I think the apparent reference to the 2008 film "Definitely, Maybe" is worth mentioning, at least. (I probably put it in an awkward spot, though.)172.70.174.134 17:55, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

Definitely. ... Maybe?

No, definitely. Please do.

ProphetZarquon (talk) 17:21, 25 December 2023 (UTC)

All options definotly accounted for. 172.70.211.187 18:36, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

Randall misspelled leopard in the title text. 162.158.202.7 23:23, 23 December 2023 (UTC)

I'm in the cat right now, but when I get home I'll shove the car off my leopard & see about getting a correction

ProphetZarquon (talk) 17:19, 25 December 2023 (UTC)

Diffinatley TenGolf MathHacker (talk) 17:47, 5 January 2024 (UTC)

a coin will defineatly land on heads Squishmallow fan (talk) 14:32, 9 February 2024 (UTC)