User:Daniel Carrero/Sandbox
More panels/text have been appearing on the comic constantly since its debut, so expanding this transcript is expected to be a constant work in progress. We still probably have many storylines missing. Feel free to add more if you find them! |
This transcript is incomplete. Please help editing it! Thanks. |
This is the transcript of 1350: Lorenz. Here, we strive to capture as many storylines as possible, but this is expected to be a constant work in progress as new panels become available in the comic.
How to edit
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Template:beginbranch (title text - click "show"!) Template:midbranch (text to be hidden/shown) Template:endbranch
A vertical line signifies a tree of multiple available options.
'''Knit Cap Girl''': {{beginline}} A) Yes!<br> B) No!<br> C) Maybe! {{endline}}
Knit Cap Girl:
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A) Yes!
B) No!
C) Maybe!
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Hints and warnings:
This system is designed to be very easy to read, but when editing the code it may be hard to find the right panels amidst a sea of different storylines. Make extensive use of Ctrl+F and the Preview function. If you have a lot of text to add, save it somewhere else in case of edit conflicts. Occasionally the same line of text is found more than once in different places; make sure you are editing the right one.
Transcript
Knit Cap Girl:
[Typing on the laptop and thinking.]
(permalink)
Template:beginbranch Refresh... No new email... Refresh... No new tweets... Refresh... (permalink) Template:midbranch
Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch So you're still refusing to use Facebook? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Wanna build a snowman? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Hey. I hear Godot is in town. Wanna try to meet him? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch You know. Your car's on fire. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game. (branch 1) (permalink)
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[Hairy visits Knit Cap Girl.]
Hairy:
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Template:beginbranch There's something weird out on the lawn. Template:midbranch
Hat Guy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch This is an apartment. We don't have a lawn. Template:midbranch [Knit Cap Guy and Hairy leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch OK, two weird things. Template:midbranch
Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch I count three. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Why is there a gap here? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Who tiled the moat? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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Template:beginbranch I can see a creeper down there. Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Damn Griefers. Template:endbranch
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Is this 1-1 from Mario?
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy pass by a tree.]
Hairy:
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Why does that tree looks fake?
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Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Theft"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: ...
Pikachu: Um...
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Template:beginbranch Actually, it's the final castle. Grab your Fire Flower! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch It's over this way. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I've never been this far before! Template:midbranch Hairy: Are you going insane again? Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch See? It's like a glitch in the Matrix. Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch How far can we go? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:beginbranch What the fuck?! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:beginbranch How... How do we get everything back? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch This isn't where I left that... Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline
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I have a lawn?
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy leave the house. They pass by a moat.]
Hairy:
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Hmmm, did you order a moat?
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Knit Cap Girl:
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It helps keep bobcats out.
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Template:beginbranch Of course. All cool kids have moats in their yards. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I don't have the best relationship with my mailman. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Yep. Delivered in two days, courtesy of Amazon Prime. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I don't remember this being here. Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch It has begun! That's one of the first holes in reality. Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch I've been working on a theory that 2048 is a tool for the old ones to open up portals to this reality. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch What about black holes? Those don't count? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch We must go deeper. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I wanted to jump over the massive sinkhole, but nooo, someone just had to find out what was down there. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Oh, I had the moving company install it last week. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch We poop in it. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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Finally got you out of the damn house.
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Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
Narrator: ...
Pikachu: Um...
Pikachu: Well then.
Pikachu: I might have left surprises in that direction.
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Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Look how deep it goes! Template:midbranch Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch I wonder if we can get someone to fall in? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I'm going in. You can come if you want to. I think I see stars down there. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch That was a missing opportunity. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I should come outside more often. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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It looks like I can see Moria from here.
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Knit Cap Girl:
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You see Moria from everywhere, Hairy.
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Narrator: A wild Pikachu appeared!
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Ink Cloud"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator:
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Google Maps didn't warn me of this.
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Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Uplift!"
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Cute Face!"
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Faceless"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Where's Twitch when I need help?
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Abandonment"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
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Enemy Pikachu used "The Discrete Metric"!
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Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Extrude"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: ...
Pikachu: Um...
Pikachu:
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Now I only have Struggle left. Tie?
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Pikachu: No fair!
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Template:beginbranch We are the knights who say Ni! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch What is even going on here? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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Gathered the ink!
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Narrator: It's not very effective...
Narrator: Enemy Pikachu used "Granite"!
Narrator: It's not very effective...
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Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Yeah, who did you think gave them a balrog? Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch One does not simple "give" a balrog. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch What? You weren't using it! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Gift-wrapping's the hardest part. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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Moria is an anagram of Mario!
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy pass by a tree.]
Hairy: Not idly do the leaves of Lorien fall.
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I hope it's not a bobcat this time.
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[A giant hole appears and they fall into it.]
Knit Cap Girl and Hairy: Aaaaa...
[Knit Cap Girl wakes up.]
Knit Cap Girl: Gasp [Goes to his desk.]
Knit Cap Girl: Yawn [Sits at his desk.]
Knit Cap Girl:
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Might as well clear more tiles.
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[Hairy visits Knit Cap Girl again.]
Hairy:
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Um, there's a hole in your lawn...
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Knit Cap Girl:
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If it doesn't lead to a 1024 tile, I'm leaving.
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Template:beginbranch Damn bobcats. Template:midbranch Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch Well it was here... Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I don't think it was bobcats this time. Unless they have backshoes... Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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I just had a dream about that.
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy go outside again and fall in the hole again~.]
Knit Cap Girl and Hairy: Aaaaa...
[Knit Cap Girl wakes up, leaves the bed and finds a boomerang.]
Knit Cap Girl:
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It looks like is [sic] fell from space.
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[Knit Cap Girl throwns the boomerang away and it hits something.]
Crash!
[Knit Cap Girl runs away.]
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I hope this isn't just another one of those dreams that keeps coming back at you.
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[Knit Cap Girl throws the boomerang twice, only for it to return to him both times.]
Knit Cap Girl: Hm. I was expecting a shark.
[Knit Cap Girl throwns the boomerang again, and it returns to him again.]
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I hope this was not thrown by a bobcat.
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[Knit Cap Girl throws the boomerang, only for it to return to him .]
Knit Cap Girl: There's a mesage written on it.
[Knit Cap Girl throws the boomerang again. It hits something.]
Crash!
[Knit Cap Girl runs away.]
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Template:beginbranch There's someone at the door looking for you. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I made an apple pie. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch If you want to do that, I'm rebuilding my bathroom this afternoon. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Definitely not going outside today. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Thank God it wasn't a bobcat. Template:midbranch Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch You just got a package. It's by the door. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Why is there a bobcat on your lawn? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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There's somewhere [sic] weird out on the lawn.
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Knit Cap Girl:
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This seems familiar.
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy go outside.]
Knit Cap Girl: I hope it's not a velociraptor.
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Template:beginbranch Hold up. I need to get my wingsuit first. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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I hope it's not a giant hole.
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy go outside. They pass by a tree.]
Hairy: How disappointed are you?
Knit Cap Girl:
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I was expecting a bobcat.
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Template:beginbranch Oh? That's the other tree. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Eh, not that much. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I have a bad feeling about this. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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Hey do you know why there's a giant hole in the yard?
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy go outside.]
Knit Cap Girl: I swear if it's a bobcat.
Knit Cap Girl:
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Why did you bring me here?
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Template:beginbranch This dream has been looping for years, and yet we never tire of it. Why is that? Template:midbranch [There is a gap in the ground. Knit Cap Girl jumps over it, Hairy looks into it.] Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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Hmmm... I should buy a shovel.
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[Knit Cap Girl looks at his screen wondering.]
Knit Cap Girl:
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Wow! Shovels sure are expensive!
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Template:beginbranch Shovels can't be actually made out of two sticks and a row of rocks? Template:midbranch [Knit Cap Girl is wondering more. Hairy comes. They connect their laptops. Hairy is wondering. Knit Cap Girl tries something at Hairy's laptop.] Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch How can there be 36 types of shovel??! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch These prices are insane! I wonder if you can rent a shovel... Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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If you reprogrammed the squirrel laser to target hipsters again...
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[Knit Cap Girl and Hairy go outside.]
Knit Cap Girl:
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Let's just say we won't have to worry about parking.
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Template:beginbranch No, now they're just wearing wigs ironically. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Things may have gotten out of control a little. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch At least it improved their haircuts. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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There's a dinosaur at the door.
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T-Rex:
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Self-doubt crippled my arms. Can I have yours?
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T-Rex:
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Never answer your mobile phone while I am addressing you!
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[T-Rex is going to step on a house.]
T-Rex:
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I think you just entered a dead zone.
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[Knit Cap Girl is inside the house. She wakes up from a dream, goes outside and finds a boomerang.]
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Template:beginbranch Kids these days. Template:midbranch [Knit Cap Girl is inside the house. She wakes up from a dream, and goes back to her computer.] Template:endbranch
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Die you monster.
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[Hairy is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream, and starts singing.]
Hairy: [Singing] I woke up like this.
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Template:beginbranch Also, have you heard about Tumblr? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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Also I have some trenchant observations on language and philosophy to make.
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[T-Rex is going to step on a house.]
T-Rex: Also, your brain is like this house.
[Knit Cap Girl is inside the house. He wakes up from a dream and goes back to his computer.]
Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch It's not like you're using them. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I need a hand! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Did you think he was joking? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Sorry for just barging in, I couldn't reach the doorbell. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I heard Home Depot has 1024 bathroom tiles. Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch But how many bathrooms? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch That's 2^5 more than Ikea, I need to see for myself. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Let's go, I can keep playing on my phone on the drive. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Pfft. Amateurs. Let's go mock them. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I think I saw a "4096" tile outside somewhere. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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These stupid tiles... I'll just play one more game. (branch 2) (permalink)
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[Hairy visits Knit Cap Girl.]
Hairy:
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Template:beginbranch What's with those tiny games you keep playing, anyway? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Isn't that sort of meaningless? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Up for a dangerous experiment with no pay? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch You won't believe what just fell off of your roof. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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Oh. Hey. There's some kind of political thing going on.
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Laptop: "...and let's go live to the debate."
[Two politicians are debating on TV.]
Politician 1:
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Template:beginbranch In contrast to my oppponent, who I quote, "Never liked Firefly much to begin with." Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch ...but even if you tied enough birds to the car, would you get them to take off in unison? Template:midbranch Politician 2: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch Tie a predatory bird to the car with a somewhat shorter rope so that it will scare off the rest of the birds without being able to reach them. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Training. That's why I support the "Airlift Act", which would put more resources into the hands of bird educators everywhere. Template:midbranch Politician 1: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch But is "Airlift" an acronym? Template:midbranch Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch There are birds outside tied to a car. Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch Cool, let's see who we should vote for. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I know who I'm voting for. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch How many birds? (permalink) Template:midbranch Hairy: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch I call her "Serenity." Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch So when you said birds... Template:midbranch Knit Cap Girl: Template:beginline Template:beginbranch Wait. The birds are inside!? Template:midbranch White Hat: Want to forget your dreams? There's a pill for that! Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Someone inside the rocket: I needed to escape from politics anyway. Template:midbranch Voice inside the rocket: "…And let’s go live to the debate". (permalink) Other spacecraft: We observe your speed to be 38.5%c, and your time is passing at 92.3% the rate of ours. Does this mirror your observations? Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch All terms are relative. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Liquefied bird fuel is the way to the future. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Well, by “birds” and “car” I really meant a rocket. There’s totally a rocket in your lawn, man. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch The owls in our barn are forming a union. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Or course: Avian Implemented Reuseable Lifter and Ingenuous Flight Technology! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch But you must agree that a bitd in the hand is worth more than three educators in the bush. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Incredible! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Wait... Is that like people who educate birds, or birds that teach? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch By opening and closing an umbrella near them. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch One word: Fiscal hawks. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch And if elected, I vow to win this war on Christmas once and for all! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch I agree with my opponent all all [sic] issues and I think his economic plan is fantastic! Template:midbranch Template:endbranch Template:endline Template:endbranch
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Let's see if BSD is any easier to install nowadays.
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[Knit Cap Girl is confused, staring at his laptop.]
Knit Cap Girl: ??
Knit Cap Girl:
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Template:beginbranch Now I just need to look up what a "beard error" is... Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Wait. What's on this other partition? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Why is Python importing Skynet? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch My keyboard has to support SSH over USB? Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
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Template:beginbranch Gravity. Lots of it. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch
Template:beginbranch Hurry! We're in talks with Facebook. Template:midbranch Template:endbranch