Editing 1512: Horoscopes
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| title = Horoscopes | | title = Horoscopes | ||
| image = horoscopes.png | | image = horoscopes.png | ||
− | | titletext = If you live in the Northern hemisphere. In the southern hemisphere, due to the coriolis effect, babies are born nine months BEFORE they're conceived. | + | | titletext = If you live in the Northern hemisphere, anyway. In the southern hemisphere, due to the coriolis effect, babies are born nine months BEFORE they're conceived. |
}} | }} | ||
==Explanation== | ==Explanation== | ||
− | {{w|Horoscopes}} | + | {{w|Horoscopes}} are supposed to predict someone's personality or future, depending on the position of planets and stars at the time of their birth and presently, especially based on their ({{w|zodiac signs}}). Today, horoscopes are admitted to be {{w|pseudoscience}} which is why the comic jokes about the fact that its horoscopes at least ''may'' be true (at least for someone born in the {{w|United States}}, after a full term pregnancy). "Real" horoscopes are typically so vague that they could be true for anyone regardless of their sign. |
− | + | Since the 12 category zodiac signs in horoscopes are based on birthday dates, [[Randall]] can do some informed guess about the context of someone's {{w|Fertilisation|conception}} (i.e., what was happening nine months before they were born), depending on the sign. For example, {{w|Virgo (astrology)|Virgo}} are born mostly in September, so they were conceived shortly before Christmas, leading to the guess "You may have been {{w|Fertilisation|conceived}} while a Christmas song played". So Randall's "predictions" are possible, if not useful. Contrary to popular horoscopes, here there is an actual reason why for instance the horoscope for Virgo is most likely true for Virgos and so on. See detailed description in the [[#Table of Astrological signs|table]] below. | |
− | + | The title text refers to the {{w|Coriolis effect}} which occurs to a body that is moving on an object that is spinning. Since the Earth is rotating this leads to the fact that something that is moving on Earth feels a force (the Coriolis force) which causes the moving object to be deflected to the right in the {{w|northern hemisphere}} and to the left in the {{w|southern hemisphere}}. This effect is the reason that {{w|Coriolis_effect#Meteorology|weather systems}} (most clearly seen for {{w|hurricanes}}) rotates in one direction in the northern hemisphere and in the opposite direction in the southern hemisphere. There is also a common {{w|Coriolis_effect#Draining_in_bathtubs_and_toilets|misconception}} that water will spin down a plug hole in a different direction in the two hemispheres (see also [[843: Misconceptions]]). The Coriolis force can also be experienced on a much smaller scale, for instance if you try to walk on a spinning carousel. | |
− | Randall | + | Randall plays on misconceptions regarding this {{w|fictitious force}} to make a joke involving reversing the flow of time. So whereas babies are born nine months '''after''' conception in the northern hemisphere (clockwise) the Coriolis effect is the reason why babies are being born nine months '''before''' in the southern hemisphere (counterclockwise). |
− | + | In reality, the relevant difference between the northern and southern hemispheres is that the meteorological seasons are a half-year out of phase between the two. This renders some of the "predictions" (such as a hot day in August or people trapped by snow in January-February) invalid for the southern hemisphere. | |
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==Table of Astrological signs== | ==Table of Astrological signs== | ||
Here below is a table with data and explanation of the individual horoscopes: | Here below is a table with data and explanation of the individual horoscopes: | ||
{| class="wikitable" | {| class="wikitable" | ||
− | !{{w|Astrological sign}} | + | ! {{w|Astrological sign}} |
− | ! | + | ! English name |
− | ! | + | ! Date range |
− | !Horoscope prediction | + | ! 9 months before |
− | !Explanation | + | ! Horoscope prediction |
+ | ! Explanation | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | |♈ {{w|Aries (astrology)|Aries}} | + | |♈{{w|Aries (astrology)|Aries}} |
− | |March 21 | + | |The Ram |
− | |June | + | |March 21 - April 21 |
+ | |June 21 - July 21 | ||
|You may have been conceived after a 4th of July fireworks show | |You may have been conceived after a 4th of July fireworks show | ||
− | |In the US the {{w|Independence Day (United States)|Independence Day}} is celebrated on the 4th of July, and this is customarily celebrated with huge fireworks | + | |In the US the {{w|Independence Day (United States)|Independence Day}} is celebrated on the 4th of July, and this is customarily celebrated with huge fireworks. |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♉ {{w|Taurus (astrology)|Taurus}} | + | |♉{{w|Taurus (astrology)|Taurus}} |
− | |April 20 | + | |The Bull |
− | |July | + | |April 20 - May 20 |
+ | |July 20 - August 20 | ||
|You may have been conceived on a hot August day | |You may have been conceived on a hot August day | ||
− | |In most of the northern hemisphere there are many hot days in {{w|August}} | + | |In most of the northern hemisphere there are many hot days in {{w|August}}. |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♊ {{w|Gemini (astrology)|Gemini}} | + | |♊{{w|Gemini (astrology)|Gemini}} |
− | |May 21 | + | |The Twins |
− | |August | + | |May 21 - June 21 |
+ | |August 21 - September 21 | ||
|You may have been conceived as the leaves began to change | |You may have been conceived as the leaves began to change | ||
− | |In the northern part of the northern hemisphere the {{w|autumn}} starts at the end of this time period, so the leaves will begin to change color. | + | |In the northern part of the northern hemisphere the {{w|autumn}} starts at the end of this time period, so the leaves will begin to change color. |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♋ {{w|Cancer (astrology)|Cancer}} | + | |♋{{w|Cancer (astrology)|Cancer}} |
− | |June 21 | + | |The Crab |
− | |September | + | |June 21 - July 21 |
+ | |September 21 - October 21 | ||
|You may have been conceived by people trying on costumes | |You may have been conceived by people trying on costumes | ||
− | |This period ends | + | |This period ends 10 days before {{w|Halloween}}, so it is not unlikely that the people who conceived you (mom and dad) tried on their new costumes when they made you. |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♌ {{w|Leo (astrology)|Leo}} | + | |♌{{w|Leo (astrology)|Leo}} |
− | |July 22 | + | |The Lion |
− | |October | + | |July 22 - August 23 |
− | |You may have been conceived during | + | |October 22 - November 23 |
− | |{{w|Thanksgiving}} is celebrated in the US on | + | |You may have been conceived during thanksgiving |
+ | |{{w|Thanksgiving}} is celebrated in the US on fourth Thursday of November, which for only two out of seven years will lie before the 23rd of November. However many people are born before 9 months so it is not unlikely for someone born as a Leo to be conceived on this day. | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | |♍ {{w|Virgo (astrology)|Virgo}} | + | |♍{{w|Virgo (astrology)|Virgo}} |
− | |August 23 | + | |The Maiden |
− | |November | + | |August 23 - September 22 |
+ | |November 23 - December 22 | ||
|You may have been conceived while a Christmas song played | |You may have been conceived while a Christmas song played | ||
− | |It is very common for {{w|Christmas}} songs to be played in the month | + | |It is very common for {{w|Christmas}} songs to be played in the month before Christmas |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♎ {{w|Libra (astrology)|Libra}} | + | |♎{{w|Libra (astrology)|Libra}} |
− | |September 22 | + | |The Scales |
− | |December | + | |September 22 - October 23 |
− | |You may have been conceived after a | + | |December 22 - January 23 |
− | |{{w|New Year's Eve}} always falls on December 31 | + | |You may have been conceived after a new year's eve party |
+ | |Since {{w|New Year's Eve}} always falls on December 31, and since the party goes on into the new year this fits with Libra. As it is very likely that people are together in a way that may lead to conception at this type of parties, there may even be rather more than a 30th part of the people that are Libra that are conceived at such a party. | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | |♏ {{w|Scorpio (astrology)|Scorpio}} | + | |♏{{w|Scorpio (astrology)|Scorpio}} |
− | |October 23 | + | |The Scorpion |
− | |January | + | |October 23 and November 22 |
+ | |January 23 - February 22 | ||
|You may have been conceived by people stuck inside after a long winter | |You may have been conceived by people stuck inside after a long winter | ||
− | |This period is during the coolest part and towards the end of the {{w|winter}} in the northern hemisphere. People may even be forced to stay at home due to snow. When people have nothing else to do [https://www.google.dk/search?q=babies+9+month+after+snowstorm&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&gws_rd=cr&ei=qzkuVcjAE4qsswGevoC4CQ many babies are born 9 months later] | + | |This period is during the coolest part and towards the end of the {{w|winter}} in the northern hemisphere. People may even be forced to stay at home due to snow. When people have nothing else to do [https://www.google.dk/search?q=babies+9+month+after+snowstorm&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&gws_rd=cr&ei=qzkuVcjAE4qsswGevoC4CQ many babies are born 9 months later]. |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♐ {{w|Sagittarius (astrology)|Sagittarius}} | + | |♐{{w|Sagittarius (astrology)|Sagittarius}} |
− | |November 22 | + | |The Archer |
− | |February | + | |November 22 - December 21 |
− | |You may have been conceived during March | + | |February 22 - March 21 |
− | | | + | |You may have been conceived during March madness |
+ | |Although originally the early part of the mating season for the {{w|European Hare}}, in which females fight off male suitors, in a US context this is an American college Basketball tournament [http://www.ncaa.com/march-madness]. | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | |♑ {{w|Capricorn (astrology)|Capricorn}} | + | |♑{{w|Capricorn (astrology)|Capricorn}} |
− | |December 22 | + | |The Goat |
− | |March | + | |December 22 - January 19 |
+ | |March 22 - April 19 | ||
|You may have been conceived during a sexy Easter Egg hunt | |You may have been conceived during a sexy Easter Egg hunt | ||
− | |{{w|Easter}} falls between {{w| | + | |{{w|Easter}} falls between {{w|List_of_dates_for_Easter#Earliest_Easter|March 22}} and {{w|List_of_dates_for_Easter#Latest_Easter|April 25}} so most {{w|Egg hunt|Easter Egg hunt}}, sexy or nor, will fall in the relevant period to conceive Capricorn children. The goal of an Easter egg hunt can be to find as many eggs in a given time, or find a sequence of eggs, each containing a clue to the next. It is not difficult to think of adult variations on these themes. Most Egg hunts do not involve people who should make them sexy! |
|- | |- | ||
− | |♒ {{w|Aquarius (astrology)|Aquarius}} | + | |♒{{w|Aquarius (astrology)|Aquarius}} |
− | |January | + | |The Water Carrier |
− | |April | + | |January 20 - February 18 |
− | |You may have been conceived on Mother's | + | |April 20 - May 18 |
− | |{{w|Mother's Day}} in the USA, and some other countries, is on the second Sunday in May, between | + | |You may have been conceived on Mother's day |
+ | |{{w|Mother's Day}} in the USA,and some other countries, is on the second Sunday in May, between the 8th and 14th of May. | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | |♓ {{w|Pisces (astrology)|Pisces}} | + | |♓{{w|Pisces (astrology)|Pisces}} |
− | |February | + | |The Fish |
− | |May | + | |February 19 - March 20 |
+ | |May 21 - June 21 | ||
|You may have been conceived at someone's wedding | |You may have been conceived at someone's wedding | ||
− | | | + | |It is not uncommon that people meet and even go so far as to risk conceiving a child at someones {{w|wedding}}. The tradition of a June Bride (late spring and beginning of summer in the northern hemisphere) may be an old one and hence explains the reference for Pisces which lies mainly in June. [https://open.abc.net.au/explore/22074 ABC claim] that in the 15th and 16th century, May would have been the month for an "annual bath", and moreover {{w|June}} is named for {{w|Juno (mythology)|Juno}}, goddess of the home and hearth. |
|} | |} | ||
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:'''Horoscopes''' | :'''Horoscopes''' | ||
:With an actual basis in fact | :With an actual basis in fact | ||
− | :[A | + | :[A table with the name of each astrological sign in the first column and a horoscope for each sign in the second column.] |
− | + | {| class="wikitable" | |
− | ! Aries | + | ! Aries |
| You may have been conceived after a 4th of July fireworks show | | You may have been conceived after a 4th of July fireworks show | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Taurus | + | ! Taurus |
| You may have been conceived on a hot August day | | You may have been conceived on a hot August day | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Gemini | + | ! Gemini |
| You may have been conceived as the leaves began to change | | You may have been conceived as the leaves began to change | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Cancer | + | ! Cancer |
| You may have been conceived by people trying on costumes | | You may have been conceived by people trying on costumes | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Leo | + | ! Leo |
− | | You may have been conceived during | + | | You may have been conceived during thanksgiving |
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Virgo | + | ! Virgo |
| You may have been conceived while a Christmas song played | | You may have been conceived while a Christmas song played | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Libra | + | ! Libra |
− | | You may have been conceived after a | + | | You may have been conceived after a new year's eve party |
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Scorpio | + | ! Scorpio |
| You may have been conceived by people stuck inside after a long winter | | You may have been conceived by people stuck inside after a long winter | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Sagittarius | + | ! Sagittarius |
− | | You may have been conceived during March | + | | You may have been conceived during March madness |
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Capricorn | + | ! Capricorn |
− | | You may have been conceived during a sexy Easter | + | | You may have been conceived during a sexy Easter Egg hunt |
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Aquarius | + | ! Aquarius |
| You may have been conceived on Mother's day | | You may have been conceived on Mother's day | ||
|- | |- | ||
− | ! Pisces | + | ! Pisces |
| You may have been conceived at someone's wedding | | You may have been conceived at someone's wedding | ||
|} | |} | ||
{{comic discussion}} | {{comic discussion}} | ||
− | + | <!-- Include any categories below this line. --> | |
+ | |||
[[Category:Sex]] | [[Category:Sex]] | ||
[[Category:Christmas]] | [[Category:Christmas]] |