Editing 1011: Baby Names

{{comic
| number    = 1011
| date      = February 1, 2012
| title     = Baby Names
| image     = baby names.png
| titletext = I've been trying for a couple years now but I haven't been able to come up with a name dumber than 'Renesmee'.
}}

==Explanation==

This comic is a list of comically terrible baby names invented by Randall. It may relate to his other comics about why he shouldn't be allowed to have access to babies.

This is a list of the names with a short description:
* Ponzi - An Italian surname, most often associated with "{{w|Ponzi scheme}}".
* Eeemily - A corruption of "Emily". May also be a marketing plug for the {{w|Asus Eee}} brand.
* Fire Fire - Even a single "Fire" would be odd as a name, at least in the American dialects. It would also not be a good idea to call your child's name in a crowded place. This name could also be the inverse of "Ice Ice", a common joke baby name referencing Ice Ice Baby.
* Chipotla - A frequent mispronounciation of {{w|Chipotle|chipotle}} chili or the popular {{w|Chipotle Mexican Grill}} restaurant chain. Many people would readily attempt to correct you when you called your child's name. Possibly reads as a feminine version of ''chipotle''.
* Astamouthe - Could be pronounced "{{w|Ass to mouth}}".
* Eggsperm - A child is conceived by combining an egg and a sperm, this child's name is conceived by combining the names of the two things.
* [sound of record scratch] - This cannot be spelled or reliably pronounced.{{Citation needed}} Likely a reference to any movie where a record scratch plays and the protagonist says "that's me".
* Parsley - {{w|Parsley}} is an herb and is not commonly used as a name unlike other herbs like {{w|Rosemary}} and {{w|Sage}}. It is, however, probably the least terrible name on this list. 
* Hot'n'Juicy Ann - "Ann" is a normal name. Prefacing it with the sexual "Hot'n'Juicy" would not be appropriate for a child's name.
* Ovari - Female reproductive organ, {{w|Ovary|misspelled}}.
* Friendly - Odd enough on its own, but when referring to her possessions it would create confusion with the restaurant {{w|Friendly's}}. Can also be humorous in introductions - "Hi I'm Friendly and I hate you."
* Sean (pronounced "seen") - While this isn't an incorrect pronunciation, the more common pronunciation would be "Shawn". Very likely a reference to the name of the actor Sean Bean (whose name is pronounced Shawn Been), which uses the exact same paring of letters for two pronunciations. 
* Joyst - Corruption of "Joyce". May also refer to the term "joist", which is a beam used in construction to support ceilings or floors, or the first part of the word "joystick", a video game controller.

A further analysis of baby names is presented by Randall in the [[Blag]] post "[http://blog.xkcd.com/2014/01/31/the-baby-name-wizard/ The Baby Name Wizard]".

Renesmee (from the title text) is the name of {{w|Renesmee Cullen#Renesmee Cullen|Renesmee Cullen}}, who is the baby born in the book and movie {{w|Breaking Dawn}} to parents Edward and Bella. Edward and Bella get "Renesmee" from an amalgamation of the names of Bella's mother, Renée, and Edward's adoptive mother, Esme. [[Randall]]'s point is that all those names are terrible, but (arguably) not nearly as terrible as the name Renesmee.

==Transcript==
:[Cueball sits at a desk, thinking with his hand on his chin, his other hand holding a pen over a piece of paper. Megan stands behind him, looking over his shoulder, also with her hand on her chin.]

:[Above the drawing is the list they are writing by hand.]

:Names for daughter

:# Ponzi
:# Eeemily
:# Fire Fire
:# Chipotla
:# Astamouthe
:# Eggsperm
:# [sound of record scratch]
:# Parsley
:# Hot'n'Juicy Ann
:# Ovari
:# Friendly
:# Sean (pronounced "seen")
:# Joyst

==Trivia==
*Eemili is a real Finnish (man's) name, cognate to Aemilius/Emil in other European languages.

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball]]
[[Category:Comics with babies]]