Editing 1253: Exoplanet Names

{{comic
| number    = 1253
| date      = August 19, 2013
| title     = Exoplanet Names
| image     = exoplanet names.png
| titletext = If you have any ideas, I hear you can send them to <nowiki>iaupublic@iap.fr</nowiki>.
}}
==Explanation==
On the 14th August 2013, the {{w|International Astronomical Union}} (IAU) [http://www.iau.org/science/news/179/ issued a document] about public naming of astronomical objects. It stated, "IAU fully supports the involvement of the general public, whether directly or through an independent organized vote, in the naming of planetary satellites, newly discovered planets, and their host stars."

The text above the image states the fact above and then notes that the IAU immediately regret this decision. As we can see from [[Cueball|Cueball's]] question, from [[Ponytail|Ponytail's]] facepalm, and the fact that even [[Megan]] is speechless, the suggestions are appalling. It becomes even worse when [[Hairbun]] tells them that an automatic filter has already been applied to the results, one designed to remove inappropriate entries that don't meet certain criteria. This implies that the list would have been even worse if presented in its unfiltered form (as seen below in the table).

The naming document also contained, amongst other things, guidelines that suggested names should meet. These include stipulations such as "16 characters or less", "preferably one word", being "pronounceable (in as many languages as possible)", "not too similar to an existing name of an astronomical object", avoiding commercial names, and being "respectful of intellectual property". If we go down the list, we can see that many of [[Randall|Randall's]] suggestions do indeed violate the guidelines. Which is part of the joke as it reflects the tendency of internet submissions to ignore such softly suggested guidelines.

The randomness and inappropriateness of the suggested names reflects the commonly expected response from anonymous submitters on the internet. Many forums and contests that call for online response and do not apply strict control over the responses receive similar collections of random, inappropriate and obscure submissions that are often only tangentially related to the original subject. For example, Greenpeace held a naming contest for one of the whales recently tagged in their research and preservation campaign and even after selecting the finalists the online voting resulted in naming the whale "Mr. Splashypants". PepsiCo had even less restrictive controls in their marketing campaign that asked the internet to name a new flavor of Mountain Dew. They had to shut down the contest in order to avoid naming the new beverage "Hitler did nothing wrong" which was the current leader at the time and only marginally the most inappropriate of the top ten voted suggestions. Even more recently is the case of {{w|Boaty McBoatface}}, in which the internet decided to dub a British research vessel "Boaty McBoatface". The boat was given the name {{w|RRS Sir David Attenborough}} in the end, with its Autonomous Underwater Vehicle being called "Boaty McBoatface."

The document also states that naming suggestions may be sent to the email that Randall included in the title text.

This comic was updated in [[1555: Exoplanet Names 2]].

{| class="wikitable"
! Star !! Planet !! Suggested Name !! Explanation
|-
| rowspan=7 | {{w|Gliese 667}} || {{w|Gliese 667 Cb|b}} || Space Planet || A very unoriginal name; every planet is in space.{{Citation needed}}
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cc|c}} || PILF || Pun of {{w|MILF pornography|MILF}}, i.e. ''Planet I'd Like to Fuck''. Planet c is a relatively hot planet, within the habitable zone.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cd|d}} || A Star || "A {{w|Star}}" is obviously a bad name for a planet. A* (pronounced "A star") is already used in astronomy, for example the Milky Way's black hole core is {{w|Sagittarius A*}}. "A star" is also the name for the character {{w|asterisk}} and the name of the popular {{w|A* search algorithm}} in computer science. It also suggests that the planet is a star.{{Citation needed}}
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Ce|e}} || e'); DROP TABLE PLANETS;-- || A reference to {{w|SQL injection}}, riffing off of [[327: Exploits of a Mom]], which featured a schoolboy named <code>[[Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--]]</code>.  The idea here is that the IAU would enter the name into their system and promptly lose all of their data pertaining to planets.  Note that Planet e is located in the habitable zone of the star system.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cf|f}} || Blogosphere || rowspan = 2 | Weird ''{{w|blog}}''-related terms are a recurring theme in xkcd. See, for instance, [[181|comic 181]].
|-
|{{w|Gliese 667 Cg|g}} || Blogodrome
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_667c_h/ h] || Earth || Planet candidate h is about the mass of the Earth, and described as "tantalizing": [http://www.aanda.org/articles/aa/abs/2013/08/aa21331-13/aa21331-13.html A dynamically-packed planetary system around GJ with three super-Earths in its habitable zone]. See also ([[1231: Habitable Zone]]).
|-
| rowspan=5 | {{w|Tau Ceti}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_b/ b] || Sid Meier's Tau&nbsp;Ceti&nbsp;B || This refers to the game {{w|Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri}}.
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_c/ c] || Giant Dog Planet || {{w|VY Canis Majoris}} is one of the largest known stars at our galaxy and belongs to the constellation {{w|Canis Major}}, Latin for "greater dog". The constellation further contains {{w|Sirius}}, the brightest star in the night sky, also called "Dog Star".
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/tau_cet_d/ d] || Tiny Dog Planet || cf. {{w|Canis Minor}}, Latin for "lesser dog", another constellation.
|-
|{{w|Tau Ceti e|e}} || Phil Plainet || A reference to {{w|Phil Plait}}, a.k.a. The Bad Astronomer.
|-
|{{w|Tau Ceti f|f}} || Unicode Snowman || The Unicode character <span style="font-size: 200%">☃</span> may be a reference to the planet's estimated surface temperature of -40&nbsp;°C (-40&nbsp;°F). However, this name would be pronounced differently (being a symbol, not a word or name) in different languages. Planets in our solar system are assigned to {{w|Astronomical symbols|astronomical symbols}} like <span style="font-size:150%">&#x2641;</span> for Earth or <span style="font-size:150%">&#x2642;</span> for Mars. (A unicode snowman is also referenced in Randall's book ''What If'', where it is keymapped to a laptop.)
|-
| {{w|Gliese 832}} || {{w|Gliese 832 b|b}} || Asshole Jupiter || This massive planet orbits a {{w|red dwarf}} star at the longest known period of 3416 days at this category.
|-
| rowspan=6 | {{w|Gliese 581}} || {{w|Gliese 581 b|b}} || Waist-deep Cats || Likely a reference to {{w|Lolcat}}s, which  are a series of images of cats captioned with poorly-written and/or spelled English. 
|-
| {{w|Gliese|c}} || Planet #14 || About 200th discovered exoplanet (in 2007); reported to be the first potentially Earth-like planet in the habitable zone of its star, though that is in doubt now. The joke might be that like "Space Planet", "Planet #14" is a generic and unoriginal name. Also note that this is the 15th entry in the table so the numbering is {{w|Zero-based_numbering|zero-based}}.
An interesting (?) coincidence is that the 14th and 15th {{w|Definition of planet#Minor planets|Minor planets}} (then called asteroids) were discovered in 1851; see see {{w|List of minor planets: 1–1000}}. If they were to be counted among the planets of the {{w|Solar System}}, as was sometimes done then, the 14th known planetary body would be {{w| 7 Iris|Iris}} (discovered in 1847, a year before {{w|Neptune}}).
|-
|{{w|Gliese 581 d|d}} || Ballderaan || A {{w|wikt:balls|crude pun}} on the planet {{w|Alderaan}} from the ''{{w|Star Wars}}'' universe.
|-
|{{w|Gliese 581 e|e}} || Eternia Prime || {{w|Eternia}} is a fictional planet, venue of the ''{{w|Masters of the Universe}}'' animated series and toy collection.
|-
| {{w|Gliese 581 f|f}} || Taupe Mars || {{w|Kim Stanley Robinson}}'s award-winning {{w|Mars trilogy}} (''Red Mars, Green Mars, Blue Mars'' after various stages of {{w|terraformation}}). {{w|Taupe}} is a brownish-grey color.
|-
|{{w|Gliese|g}} || Jelly-Filled Planet || Possibly a reference to the conjecture that this tidally locked planet has an isolated habitable zone under the substellar point, akin to the pocket of jelly in a jelly doughnut.
|-
| rowspan=2 | {{w|Epsilon Eridani}} || {{w|Epsilon Eridani b|b}} || Skydot || [http://skydot.lanl.gov SkyDOT] is the Sky Database for Objects in Time-Domain run by {{w|LANL}} for the {{w|U.S. Dept. of Energy}} and includes data for [http://skydot.lanl.gov/nsvs/star.php?num=14831575&mask=32004 Epsilon Eridani] that can be used to constrain the orbital parameters of &epsilon; Eri b. It may also refer to how objects in space may appear as bland, bright dots in the night sky.
|-
| {{w|Epsilon Eridani c#Planet_c|c}} || Laser Noises || A {{w|Laser}} does not produce {{w|Noise (electronics)|noise}} in the signal sense; it only works at a well-defined frequency.  In science fiction films, however, laser weapon discharges are usually accompanied by sound ("pew pew" or the like). Sun-like Epsilon Eridani became a popular setting for science fiction after its publicity as a target of the {{w|Project Ozma}} experiment.
|-
| rowspan=2 | {{w|Gliese 176}} || {{w|Gliese 176 b|b}} || Pandora || The mythological name {{w|Pandora}} fulfills most of IAU's guidelines and has been popular for planets in science fiction; most recently and famously is {{w|Pandora (Avatar)|the venue}} of James Cameron's ''{{w|Avatar (film)|Avatar}}'' (although actually it is not a planet but just a moon of a gas giant in Alfa Centauri A). It is also a hellish planet from {{w|Frank Herbert}}'s {{w|Frank Herbert bibliography#WorShip novels|WorShip}} series of novels, a jungle planet in Brothers Strugatsky's {{w|Noon Universe}} and the planet used in {{w|Borderlands (video game)|Borderlands Games}}.
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_176_c/ c] || Pantera || Named for the {{w|Pantera|heavy metal band}}, which itself was named after an Italian sports car, the {{w|De Tomaso Pantera}}.
|-
| Kepler-61 || {{w|Kepler-61b|b}} || GoldenPalace.com || A gambling website, known for {{w|GoldenPalace.com|paying to have their name in unusual places}} (like forehead tattoos, species names...).
|-
! colspan=4 | (right column)
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|Upsilon Andromedae}} || {{w|Upsilon Andromedae c|c}} || Stampy || Most likely a reference to [https://www.youtube.com/user/stampylonghead stampylonghead], although it could be a reference to the elephant from the {{w|Simpsons}} episode {{w|Bart Gets an Elephant}}.
|-
|{{w|Upsilon Andromedae d|d}} || Moonchild || The name Bastian gives the Childlike Empress in {{w|The Neverending Story}}.
|-
|{{w|Upsilon Andromedae e|e}} || Ham Sphere || [http://www.hamsphere.com HamSphere] is a {{w|Amateur radio|Ham Radio}} simulator program. Ham radio uses designated radio frequencies for non-commercial exchange of messages and more. A pun of Hemisphere.
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|. Eridani|HD 20794}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_b/ b] || Cosmic Sands || style="font-family:'Comic Sans MS', 'Comic Sans'" | A {{w|pun}} on the name of the font {{w|Comic Sans}}. (<span style="font-family:papyrus">See also: [[590|590: Papyrus]].</span>)
|-
| [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_c/ c] || Legoland || {{w|Legoland}} is a chain of {{w|theme park}}s owned by the {{w|Lego Group}}.
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/hd_20794_d/ d] || Planet with Arms || A reference to the [http://www.thecolorsofmysoul.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/The-Hitchhikers-Guide-to-the-Galaxy.jpg early covers] of {{w|Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy}}? Could also be a reference to [http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/birds-with-arms "Birds with Arms" meme].
|-
| {{w|HD 85512}} || {{w|HD 85512 b|b}} || Lax Morality || Possibly a parody of science fiction in which certain planets are suggested to be uniformly... lax in morals (i.e. full of sex, drugs, etc.). See http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Planetville and related.
|-
| rowspan=6 | {{w|HD 40307}} || {{w|HD 40307 b|b}} || Good Planet || Similar to the above, except with good planets. May also be yet another non-descriptive name, like "Space Planet" and "Planet #14".
|-
|{{w|HD|c}} || ProblemLand || See above.
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 d|d}} || Slickle || This is a reference to "[http://zdarsky.tumblr.com/post/2837139960 The Petals Fall Twice]", which was made as a humorous example of bad fan-fiction. The word itself is a portmanteau of "slowly", "licked", and "tickled". This may also be a reference to the Harry Potter currency, a “Sickle.”
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 e|e}} || Spare Parts || This suggests that the planet is "worthless" or "junk". This is false, of course. May be a reference to the fact it is a planet with nothing much different from the other planets.
|-
|{{w|HD 40307 f|f}} || New Jersey VI || Refers to the state of {{w|New Jersey}}; may be an insult to either.
|-
|{{w|HD|g}} || How Do I Join the&nbsp;IAU || This implies that the user "got lost" on the IAU website and thought that the "planet name suggestion" input was for general queries.
|-
| rowspan=3 | {{w|Gliese 163}} || [http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_163_b/ b] || Neil Tyson's Mustache || {{w|Neil deGrasse Tyson}} is a famous American astrophysicist and science communicator who does maintain a distinguished mustache.
|-
|{{w|Gliese|c}} || help@gmail.com || Similar to "How Do I Join the IAU", this implies that the user confused the "planet suggestion" text box for a new email they are trying to send.
|-
|[http://exoplanet.eu/catalog/gj_163_d/ d] || Hair-Covered Planet || Refers to the well-known {{w|Hairy ball theorem}} of topology.
|-
| {{w|Pi Mensae}} || {{w|Pi Mensae b|b}} || Moon Holder || {{w|Jupiter}} has more than 60 discovered moons, and still counting... A planet ten times more massive ''must'' also be a Moon Holder.
|-
| {{w|HD 189733}} || {{w|HD 189733 b|b}} || Permadeath || A well-characterized "{{w|Hot Jupiter}}" at a temperature range of 973 ± 33 K to 1,212 ± 11 K. The name refers to the feature of {{w|permanent death}} common in many RPGs and roguelikes. It is later mentioned in [[1276: Angular Size]].
|-
| {{w|Kepler-22}} || {{w|Kepler-22 b|b}} || Blue Ivy || Blue Ivy Carter is the daughter of musicians {{w|Beyoncé}} and {{w|Jay-Z}}.
|-
| Kepler-3284 || b || Blainsley || A very small town in the United Kingdom, south of Edinburgh. Possibly chosen due to its insignificance?
|-
| Kepler-3255 || b || Unicorn Thresher || As far as we can tell, Kepler-3255b is in the vicinity of the constellation Monoceros, aka the Unicorn. Also a pun on {{w|Threshing machine|corn thresher}}.
|-
| Kepler-2418 || b || Spherical Discworld || {{w|The Discworld}} is the fictional setting for British author {{w|Terry Pratchett}}'s {{w|Discworld}} series of humorous fantasy novels; it consists of a large disc supported by four elephants themselves standing on top of a turtle flying through space. "Spherical Disc" would be an oxymoron.
|-
| Kepler-1686 || {{w|KOI-1686.01|b}} || Emergency Backup Earth || This candidate planet has an {{w|Earth Similarity Index}} of 0.89, making it one of the most habitable {{w|Kepler object of interest}}. The name suggests that it could be used as a backup in case something happened to our current planet.
|-
| Kepler-3010 || b || Feeeoooooooop || Possibly the onomatopoeia for something getting sucked into a black hole.
|-
| Kepler-4742 || b || Liz || ...Just a regular name (for a person, not a planet). Maybe a reference to the pet lizard on the Magic School Bus. 
|}

==Transcript==
{{incomplete transcript}}
:[Text above the first frame of the comic:]
::August 2013:
:The International Astronomical Union 
:decides to start naming exoplanets,
:and—for the first time ever—asks for 
:suggestions from the general public.
:::They immediately regret this decision.
:[Ponytail is facepalming while Megan and Cueball are looking at a computer screen on a desk. Hairbun points to the screen.]
:Cueball‏‎: Can't you filter out the worst ones?
:Hairbun: This is '''''after''''' the filter!

:[Below is a table showing the list of planet names as seen on the computer screen with gray background around the edges of the table.]

:[The table is in two separate columns, but there is only headings over the left, so the right column is a direct continuation of the left. In the table it is mentioned when the right column begins. There is a small arrow pointing from the word "Planet" down to the second column of the table. The headings in the comic are not inside the table as they are here below. The text at the bottom of the left list seems to continue on below, at least the last entry is cut below the middle, although it is still easy to read. Similarly the text at the top right list, seems to continue from above, the top entry missing the very top of the text. This is as if the list is much longer and here is just shown part of the list. To further indicate this the first entry in the right list begins at "c" instead of at "b" which is else the case for all other instances.]

:{| class="wikitable"
! Star !! Planet !! Suggested Name
|-
| rowspan=7 |Gliese 667||b||Space Planet
|-
|c||PILF
|-
|d||A Star
|-
|e||e'); DROP TABLE PLANETS;--
|-
|f||Blogosphere
|-
|g||Blogodrome
|-
|h||Earth
|-
| rowspan=5 |Tau Ceti||b||Sid Meier's Tau Ceti B
|-
|c||Giant Dog Planet
|-
|d||Tiny Dog Planet
|-
|e||Phil Plainet
|-
|f||Unicode Snowman
|-
|Gliese 832||b||Asshole Jupiter
|-
| rowspan= 6|Gliese 581||b||Waist-deep Cats
|-
|c||Planet #14
|-
|d||Ballderaan
|-
|e||Eternia Prime
|-
|f||Taupe Mars
|-
|g||Jelly-Filled Planet
|-
| rowspan= 2|Epsilon Eridani||b||Skydot
|-
|c||Laser Noises
|-
| rowspan= 2|Gliese 176||b||Pandora
|-
|c||Pantera
|-
|Kepler-61||b||GoldenPalace.com
|-
! colspan=3 | [Below is the right column.]
|-
| rowspan= 3|Upsilon Andromidae||c||Stampy
|-
|d||Moonchild
|-
|e||Ham Sphere
|-
| rowspan= 3|HD 20794||b||Cosmic Sands
|-
|c||Legoland
|-
|d||Planet with Arms
|-
|HD 85512||b||Lax Morality
|-
| rowspan= 6|HD 40307||b||Good Planet
|-
|c||Problemland
|-
|d||Slickle
|-
|e||Spare Parts
|-
|f||New Jersey VI
|-
|g||How Do I Join the IAU
|-
| rowspan= 3|Gliese 163||b||Neil Tyson's Mustache
|-
|c||help@gmail.com
|-
|d||Hair-Covered Planet
|-
|Pi Mensae||b||Moon Holder
|-
|HD 189733||b||Permadeath
|-
|Kepler-22||b||Blue Ivy
|-
|Kepler-3284||b||Blainsley
|-
|Kepler-3255||b||Unicorn Thresher
|-
|Kepler-2418||b||Spherical Discworld
|-
|Kepler-1686||b||Emergency Backup Earth
|-
|Kepler-3010||b||Feeeoooooooop
|-
|Kepler-442||b||Liz
|}

{{comic discussion}}

[[Category:Exoplanet Names]]
[[Category:Comics sharing name|Exoplanet Names]]
[[Category:Charts]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Cueball‏‎]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Megan]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Ponytail]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Hairbun]]
[[Category:Comics featuring Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--]]
[[Category:Astronomy]]
[[Category:Sex]]
[[Category:Exoplanets]]