3108: Laser Danger

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Laser Danger
To combat the threat, many airlines are installing wing-mounted spray bottles.
Title text: To combat the threat, many airlines are installing wing-mounted spray bottles.

Explanation

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Shining a laser at a plane is a federal crime in the United States. A powerful laser can disorient and/or blind the pilot operating the aircraft. This can prove dangerous to the safety of the aircraft and its occupants during takeoff and landing, which in themselves are hazardous periods of flight.

Cats are known to jump onto and chase laser pointers. Cats also prey on birds, with estimates of 1.3 to 3.7 billion birds killed each year. Cats do not like spray bottles, the spray bottle wets their furs, whereas cats do not like having their fur be wet; the spray bottle also emits a hissing sound, which cats associate with other cats threatening them. The "wing mounted spray bottles" on aircraft could be a reference to fuel dump tubes, which spray out fuel to lighten the aircraft, also commonly used during takeoff emergencies or before landing. To combat against actual land-based threats to aircraft in real life, El Al (The Israeli national airline) and government aircraft used by heads of state have missile defense systems installed.

Transcript

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Megan: Shining laser pointers at planes is a federal crime. It's incredibly dangerous.

Cueball: Oh, because it can blind the pilot?

Megan: That's one reason...

[A plane is shown, with a green laser pointer aimed at it.]

[The laser disappears. A cat, approximately the same size as the plane, pounces the plane and sends it tumbling.]


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Discussion

I wonder how long this was in the chamber. He must’ve been waiting for the first week of the year we didn’t have an air disaster. 172.118.150.213 05:08, 28 June 2025 (UTC)

The statute is 18 U.S. Code § 39A - Aiming a laser pointer at an aircraft 206.174.20.11 (talk) 05:21, 28 June 2025 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

It was originally written almost as if it was a US only thing, for some weird reason. It isn't. And I'm sure that, even if not explicitly existing as a "don't shine lasers at aircraft" law in any given jurisdiction, you could be prosecuted for the local version of generic "reckless endangerment", "assault" or some variation of manslaughter/murder (should the worse happen). At the very least, the "Being Bloody Stupid Act of 1581", or local equivalent, complete with 'disproportionate' retaliation by the authorities in places that are perhaps a bit short of modern legal processes but very big on 'law'-enforcement in more general (possibly militia/lynch-mob led) terms. 82.132.247.41 09:25, 28 June 2025 (UTC)

Poor cats, jumping into chemtrail-spray can't be good for them 😉 89.1.185.158 06:03, 28 June 2025 (UTC)

Chem Tails: a cute animated film about kittens fighting a government mind control conspiracy. 73.192.144.66 (talk) 13:43, 28 June 2025 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)
Knowing Randall, you'd think it'd be a raptor jumping on the plane, not a cat. RadiantRainwing (talk) 01:37, 5 October 2025 (UTC)
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