Difference between revisions of "2083: Laptop Issues"
(→Transcript: Last panel) |
(Added explanation to the last line of the table that includes a possible reference to the scifi book series "The Three Body Problem".) |
||
Line 32: | Line 32: | ||
|- | |- | ||
| ''...and when I open too many tabs, it fogs any nearby photographic film.'' | | ''...and when I open too many tabs, it fogs any nearby photographic film.'' | ||
− | | The screen would have to emitting X-rays that can pass through the film's container and expose the film | + | | The screen would have to emitting X-rays that can pass through the film's container and expose the film. This may be a reference to the scifi book series The Three Body Problem, where one character finds that all of his pictures become blurred, no matter how they were taken. |
|} | |} | ||
Revision as of 17:02, 10 December 2018
Laptop Issues |
Title text: Hang on, we got a call from the feds. They say we can do whatever with him, but the EPA doesn't want that laptop in the ocean. They're sending a team. |
Explanation
This explanation may be incomplete or incorrect: Created by a BOT WITH INEXPLICABLE TECH PROBLEMS. Horribly incomplete. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. If you can address this issue, please edit the page! Thanks. |
Cueball goes to tech support with his laptop, explaining all his arcane problems.
My laptop's battery won't hold a charge. | A common problem... |
Tried that. Now the new ones won't either. | This could be an issue with the laptop's battery management hardware. |
Also, random files get corrupted on the first of every month. Factory reset didn't help either. | Some devices may be scheduled to do a "disk cleanup" on the first of every month. Somehow, this task is corrupting files that should be kept. |
When it's plugged in, I get static from my plumbing. | TODO |
And it reboots if someone uses an arc welder nearby | TODO |
Transition(R) lenses go dark when exposed to the screen | The screen would have to emit UV rays |
...and when I open too many tabs, it fogs any nearby photographic film. | The screen would have to emitting X-rays that can pass through the film's container and expose the film. This may be a reference to the scifi book series The Three Body Problem, where one character finds that all of his pictures become blurred, no matter how they were taken. |
Transcript
This transcript is incomplete. Please help editing it! Thanks. |
- [Cueball is walking past a sign reading "Tech Support," with a right-pointing arrow and carrying a laptop.]
- Off panel voice #1: Oh, No.
- Off panel voice #2: What?
- Off panel voice #1: This guy. He has the worst tech problems.
- [Cueball at tech support desk with closed laptop on desk. Short-hair guy and Ponytail are there.]
- Cueball: My laptop's battery won't hold a charge.
- Short-hair guy: We can replace it.
- Cueball: Tried that. Now the new ones won't either.
- [Close-up of Cueball]
- Cueball: Also, random files get corrupted on the first day of every month. Factory reset didn't help.
- Off panel voice #2: You weren't kidding.
- [Close-up of Cueball]
- Cueball: When it's plugged in, I get static shocks from my plumbing.
- Off panel voice: What the...
- Cueball: And it reboots if someone uses an arc welder nearby.
- [Same tableau as second panel except that the laptop is slightly open now.]
- Cueball: Transitions® lenses go dark when exposed to the screen, and when I open too many tabs, it fogs nearby photographic film.
- Short-hair guy: We don't usually do this, but I've gotten permission from my manager to have you and the laptop hurled into the ocean.
- Cueball: That's probably for the best.
Discussion
Please provide links to https://xkcd.com/1084/ and https://xkcd.com/1586/ (unsigned by IP 172.68.65.150
- Perhaps also 1760: TV Problems and 1739: Fixing Problems and 806: Tech Support? Quiddity (talk) 05:17, 12 December 2018 (UTC)
I would recommend an exorcism for the laptop. 19:28, 10 December 2018 (UTC)
Has Randall been reading Charles Stross's "The Laundry Files"? 162.158.89.223 19:57, 10 December 2018 (UTC)
- Or his neighbor is Harry Dresden.
We had a few people like this at my last job. In addition to all their problems they refused to let us give them a new laptop and insisted we keep trying to fix the ghosts in their current laptop 172.68.58.83 21:18, 10 December 2018 (UTC)
Might this be inspired by the recent revelation that Apple Store employees are not allowed to to use the word "problem": https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/dec/03/claps-and-cheers-apple-stores-carefully-managed-drama 162.158.106.96 22:05, 10 December 2018 (UTC)
Closer reference to https://xkcd.com/349/ than 1912 was to 349 --172.68.59.84 22:53, 10 December 2018 (UTC)
It is possible (if rather rare) that there's an error on a computers logic board, that causes it to fry batteries extremely fast
"(...) and safely dispose of it." - Is there a truly safe way to dispose of this laptop? I can't think of one.--162.158.90.90 09:41, 11 December 2018 (UTC)
This laptop can only be destroyed by throwing it into the fires of Mount Doom 162.158.158.45 10:39, 11 December 2018 (UTC)
--Shouldn't that be "...the fires of Mount Dell, from which it was forged?" 172.68.58.83 16:52, 11 December 2018 (UTC)
- Andromeda Galaxy is on collision course with ours. It has black hole in it's center. I think that throwing the laptop there should be safe enough. I mean, maybe it will solve the problem with collision ... -- Hkmaly (talk) 00:42, 12 December 2018 (UTC)
- No, we need to put it in quarantine WITH a black hole and mount Doom/Dell. Nyx goddess (talk) 01:54, 12 December 2018 (UTC)
Could the glasses be a refence to the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy? [1] 141.101.98.28 09:43, 14 December 2018 (UTC)
Is it just me or when they said photographic i thought they said pornographic?