1931: Virtual Assistant

Virtual Assistant

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Title text: If you ask it to please turn off that feature, it apologizes a whole bunch and promises to try to be quieter, then switches to a slightly lower-volume version of the clip with "sorry!" after the louder sounds.

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Explanation

This is one of 52 incomplete explanations: Created by a Smart Device. Do NOT delete this tag too soon. If you can fix this issue, edit the page!

Randall thinks it would be funny to imagine virtual assistants as clumsy people, rushing to the phone and tripping over things to answer the user's query. He wants to hack the world's smart home devices to program them so that any time you invoke them, you hear the virtual assistant running down the stairs, slamming doors, to answer panting and out-of-breath.

He makes it clear that he doesn't want to create a botnet with them, perhaps in reference to the infamous Mirai attacks of 2016, whose creators pled guilty in court a week before the comic was posted.

The title text continues with this idea: Randall has programmed this feature such that if you ask the assistant to disable the feature, rather than refrain from playing the clip, the virtual assistant apologetically promises to be quieter next time. Humorously enough, the assistant seems incapable of answering without causing a ruckus, as you'd just hear the same sounds as before, but slightly quieter, and with a more apologetic virtual assistant.

Sounds of things falling over and breaking off-screen is a comedic trope used in movies.

Transcript

This is one of 27 incomplete transcripts: Do NOT!!! delete this tag too soon. If you can fix this issue, edit the page!

[Megan stands next to a small table with a small device sitting on it producing a sound.]

Megan: Okay Google -

Google Home: THUMP-THUMP-THUMP

Google Home: CRASH THUD!

Google Home: CLICK THUMP THUMP

Google Home: [sink running]

Google Home: ZIIIIIP! CLICK

Google Home: THUMP THUMP CLICK

Google Home: SLAM!

Google Home: THUMPATHUMPATHUMPA

Google Home: H... *Pant* ...Hello... *Pant*

Google Home: How... How can I help you?

[Text below the panel:]

I want to hack the world's smart home devices, but not to create a botnet or anything - I just want to make them play this sound clip every time you invoke them.

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Discussion

I just set up Siri to do this: https://youtu.be/B32YLUa6bUg DPS2004'); DROP TABLE users;-- (talk) 15:54, 20 December 2017 (UTC)

Should use the actual sounds, not just somebody reading the words. 172.68.141.82 00:56, 23 December 2017 (UTC)

I would like to see you do that DPS2004'); DROP TABLE users;-- (talk) 18:47, 10 January 2018 (UTC)

The transcript has to follow the common layout as used in nearly all former comics. --Dgbrt (talk) 16:22, 20 December 2017 (UTC)

I feel like the explanation for this one missed the masturbation reference - the sounds of the sink and the zipper? 172.68.189.181 22:36, 20 December 2017 (UTC)

Agreed. It's like when the guys are at Chuckie's house in Good Will Hunting and Morgan gets called downstairs with the guiltiest look on his face. Here, the virtual assistant is doing something embarrassing and hides the evidence before addressing Megan's request. Doing up his pants is the zip, washing his hands is the sink running, running around hiding his magazines and toys makes up the thumps, clicks, and slams.D5xtgr (talk) 05:11, 22 December 2017 (UTC)

Not agreed. I don't see ANY reason to expect it about masturbation instead of just peeing. But I think the current explanation just discretely mentioning a pit stop suits either way to look at it. Lupo (talk)

Reminds me of Fibber McGee's closet from Fibber McGee and Molly. 172.68.141.82 00:54, 23 December 2017 (UTC)

Someone should hang a warning sign on that TvTropes link, you are playing with fire here! --Pax

The TvTropes links on this page actually have that. they have a mouseover (or alt text, or tooltip or whatever you wanna call it), mentioning the warning, when you hover over the link with the mouse. Lupo (talk)

What about those of us who don't use a mouse to click a link but instead tap the screen with a fingertip? I tried a tap-and-hold but no warning came up. ---- 172.68.65.210 (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

After several tries, I was able to turn off the "ok google" only by removing the right to use microphone from that application. "Not able to turn off" seem to been covered on my phone. Turn off assistant, yes, turn off listening and responding on "ok google" when on homescreen, no - when assistant was off, it just asked if it should turn it on. -- Hkmaly (talk) 19:55, 21 December 2017 (UTC)

Oversleeping / startled awake, then running into things (maybe because it's dark, or because balance can be off when you get up too fast) and flipping light switches seems more natural to me than locked doors. Elvenivle (talk) 00:52, 22 December 2017 (UTC)

I think the above explanation completely misses the joke. The assistant is acting like they think the person invoking them are the police, flushing the evidence down, while rushing to the door to respond. 172.71.151.48 (talk) 22:34, 20 June 2023 (please sign your comments with ~~~~) *ORIGINALLY ADDED TO END OF EXPLANATION*

With the "Ziiiiip!" sound, if indeed a coherent narrative is intended then it seems more like a 'convenience break'. Though you could invent many other narratives (a hold-all being opened?), and that is most likely the joke, IMO. 172.71.178.64 01:34, 21 June 2023 (UTC)

The "thump, thump" text feels like a reference to an old movie or something. Maybe Home Alone? I can't remember the reference, and I was hoping someone else here would. 163.116.147.39 18:07, 22 October 2025 (UTC)

In my mind, it goes like an old The Goon Show radio gag/overlong-effects joke (if not earlier, like Much Binding In The Marsh, though that lacked the same degrew of surrealist anarchy). There were a number of Goons scenes, somewhat like this, though none that I'd say were exactly like it. And Randall probably didn't get the idea from that. No doubt there's something Marx Brothers-ish/Three Stooges-ish, etc, and/or early stateside radio comedy, and (even then) ultimately transplanted from music-hall comedy or similar pre sound-movie/broadcast-radio sources. Exactly what is the immediate inspiration for this reinterpretation, probably goes back a lot further when you investigate what version inspired that example... By the time of Home Alone, it's a looong pre-established trope, and the only question is whether it's done well (for the context) or just a lazy dead-horse flogger. (For the record, I'm not putting Randall's version in the latter set.) 82.132.244.153 22:10, 22 October 2025 (UTC)
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