Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Now that xkcd is carried by United Features Syndicate, there are going to be a few changes to the comic. Obviously, with the rights signed over, it will no longer be published under Creative Commons, and all previous strips will be retroactively un-CC'd and relicensed under UFS terms. All online content will be protected via proprietary DRM. I also recieved a letter outlining topics and content that would be off-limits in the new xkcd. Prohibited content includes:

- Cultural references that would be lost on the average newspaper reader

- Mathematics above the high-school level

- Obscure scientific subjects

- Overt sexual material

- Objectionable words such as fuck, shit, cunt, ass, tits, cock, scrotum, bitch, Belgium, pussy, or twat

- Same-sex relationships

- Star Wars

- Star Trek (Original Series and Enterprise)

- The home phone numbers of White House employees

- Bacon-based currencies

- Erotic use of flywheels

- Exposés regarding other United Features syndicated characters

- Exposés regarding the personal lives of United Features Syndicate executives, specifically including CEO Kenneth Lowe

- Teledildonics

- Portrayals of Johnny Cash as an Amway distributor

- Any story that ends with "and that's how my penis got the nickname 'grappling hook'."

- Computer-computer cybersex

- Swordfights between white people

- Bitch & Animal

- Sexualization of Mt. Rushmore

- Staplers as mélée weapons

- Road trip buddy comedies starring Tank Girl and William Howard Taft

- Eric S. Raymond performing in Cirque du Soleil

- Hats with buckles

- Licking of nipples atop a moving train

The internet is the past. Newspapers are the future! See you in the funny papers.
Complaints should be directed to the xkcd writing staff.
Title text: Complaints should be directed to the xkcd writing staff.


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This is a non-numbered April fools' comic, and is the first April fools' joke preformed on xkcd. This comic, formatted similarly to other posts such as Blue Eyes. The post describes xkcd becoming syndicated into a newspaper, changing from a webcomic. Newspapers are notorious for censorship of content, and Randal describes all the changes that would be required of the comic, the humor coming from their progressive absurdity.


[A Cueball and his Cueball-like friend are standing in some sort of grassy area.]
Cueball: Why did the computer cross the road?
Friend: I don't know.
Cueball: I don't know either! Computers are so complicated!
Friend: LOL!
Editor's note: "LOL" is an online acronym for "laughing out loud." It alerts you to something funny, so keep an eye out!

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Where is this coming from? was this actually online in 2007? Between comics 242 and 243? --Lupo (talk) 08:08, 18 November 2019 (UTC)

Can we discuss the jokes in this comic, like Belgium jokingly being considered a swear word? 20:12, 22 November 2019 (UTC)

I think we should. :) You are free to start a list of the items, to explain them, or a discussion here in the discussion page.