3153: Hot Water Balloon

Hot Water Balloon

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Title text: Despite a reputation for safety, the temperatures and surprisingly high pressures make them even more dangerous than the air kind, but the NTSB refuses to investigate accidents because they insist there is no 'transportation' involved.

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Explanation

Hot air balloons are an inconvenient and dangerous form of transport in which riders float into the sky in a basket suspended from a large balloon filled with hot air. Considering that the majority of passenger-carrying balloons use hot air, the specificity of the term “air balloon” could be taken to imply that there is another variant that uses something hot other than air. ("Hot air" should rather be considered as a compound term, in contrast to, for example, hydrogen or helium-filled balloons.) Water balloons are typically relatively small, sealed (unlike hot air balloons, which are open at the base), full of cold water, and intended to be thrown in a water balloon fight, a common way to have fun and cool down during hot weather. This comic combines the hot air balloon and the water balloon to create a “vehicle” consisting of a basket attached to a large balloon of heated water.

Such a balloon would float in cooler water, but not in air, unless its contents were heated so strongly that the balloon was filled with steam (i.e. water in gaseous form). A balloon filled with superheated steam could work, in principle, and, in fact could theoretically produce more air lift than a hot air balloon, as steam is less dense than air at the same temperature and pressure, but there are many practical reasons why such a balloon would be difficult to build and operate, and multiple safety concerns involve when working with steam.^{[actual citation needed]}

The title text clarifies that the hot water balloon is not just useless, but actually dangerous, as it has a large container full of hot, pressurized water, naturally leading to accidents. However, the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) doesn’t consider the stationary hot water balloon to be a form of transportation, since it doesn't move, and thus they claim any hot water balloon accidents should not fall under their purview. Considering that it is probably a business, hot water accidents would be usually reported to Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) instead, under criteria for Occupational Exposure to Heat and Hot Environments. This title text is similar to that of 3131: Cesium which also expressed a goal of causing an agency to investigate outside their usual purview.

This comic could have been inspired by the Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta, which was being held in New Mexico during the time of posting.

Transcript

[A large water balloon is sitting on the ground, with cords connected to a basket nearby with Cueball and Megan inside. The water balloon's color patterns are like a hot air balloon's. Ponytail is poking the balloon with a finger, and a squirrel is on the ground looking at the basket.]

[There are squiggly heat lines (indotherms) emanating from the balloon, as well as movement lines (agitrons) above the balloon. Above them it says:]

bloop bloop

[Caption below panel:]

Hot water balloon rides turn out to be significantly less romantic than the air kind.

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Discussion

First time making the first draft, so hopefully I did a decent job. KelOfTheStars! (talk) 21:01, 10 October 2025 (UTC)

I know they're friends and sometimes spend time chatting in fields or hiking together, but has it ever been implied that Cueball and Megan are a romantic couple before? Barmar (talk) 21:38, 10 October 2025 (UTC)

Cueball and Megan have been stand-ins for Randall and his wife before, specifically during the cancer comics. Does that count? 199.247.247.123 22:18, 10 October 2025 (UTC)

How hot is the water? 2603:800C:1200:596A:67A8:C96F:56F6:2AE6 00:39, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

Water has a lower molar mass than air. So long as it's hot enough to actually boil the water, it might work better. Of course, it will also take a lot of energy to boil the water. And you'd need it significantly hotter than traditional hot air. DanielLC (talk) 01:56, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

If you heat air to the temperature at which water remains a vapor, it's going to give enormous lift, even if there is nitrogen in it. Nitpicking (talk) 12:41, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

NTSB? What NTSB?!? 2605:59C8:160:DB08:980B:60EB:D7DF:1DC0 04:07, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

I like to imagine XKCD takes place in a world that uses up their collective insanity on innocuous things like a hot water balloon instead of what we use it for. 209.52.88.167 18:23, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

I imagine the Germans in 1934 said similar things about their petty amusements. Those who were still alive in 1945 had a chance to reflect on their sentiments. Any who remain alive in 2025 have a chance to reflect on how their experiences have taught us exactly nothing. 205.175.118.102 23:08, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

Far more romantic if you think of the balloon as a giant water-bed... 203.123.67.147 (talk) 09:31, 11 October 2025 (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

I am imagining a submersible craft that flies through the ocean currents like a hot air balloon floats through air. A large bag of warm water with a bathysphere suspended beneath it, perhaps with some kind of flame apparatus between the two to heat the water in the bag, even though that sounds impractical. JohnHawkinson (talk) 22:55, 11 October 2025 (UTC)

The Hot Water Bottle comment feels a bit superfluous? If we started listing things that remind any of us of other things it will be a long list indeed. 2A0E:1D47:D400:6000:7967:640C:CD3A:2A84 07:23, 13 October 2025 (UTC)

Agreed. If anything, the 'hot water balloon' is more reminiscent of a water bed than a hot water bottle (which could, in some cases, provide a romantic ride...). 82.13.184.33 09:02, 13 October 2025 (UTC)
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