3145: Piercing

Piercing

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Title text: Some lava around the piercing site is normal, but keep an eye out for spreading earthquakes and eruptive activity that might indicate rifting.

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Explanation

The comic shows a directional drilling rig which will drill a hole through the lithosphere to create a borehole with a constant curvature. Normally, this could be for scientific study, or something functional like creating a well or installing a heat exchanger. In this case, though, the comic suggests that the borehole is being created so that the Earth can be fitted with a piercing like a giant ring. In many societies, piercings in humans are subject to age restrictions or recommendations; it appears that in the world of the comic, the same is true of planets, as it states that the Earth is now old enough to go ahead with this procedure. If so, then Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune are probably also old enough [1], unless there is a different age requirement for gas giants.

The caption may draw on the idea of dating the age of Earth using geologic evidence. However, rather than determining the age with greater accuracy and precision, the fictional geologists have determined that the age falls into a certain developmental stage, as of a human life. In the real world, the geologic time scale does divide the Earth's history into units such as eons and eras. These may sound comparable to stages or years of one's life, but are defined by properties of the rock record—not by developmental milestones that all planets would be expected to go through. (The histories of other celestial bodies, like Mercury, Venus, Mars, and the Moon, are divided into different eras, based on unique geologic events that occurred on each.)

The title text plays on the normal warnings about piercings, replacing inflammation around the piercing with lava, and signs of infection such as pus, widening holes, or swelling with earthquakes and eruptions.

Transcript

[One large panel, overlaid by two smaller ones in the corners, shows the Earth with an upward opening curve through its crust and mantle.]

Small panel 1: [Arrow pointing to a machine on tracks with an arm and a tube into the ground, with Cueball, Megan, and Ponytail nearby] Directional drilling rig

[Label on curve in the main panel]: Constant curvature borehole

Small panel 2: [Earth with a ring embedded onto it]

[Caption below the panel:]

Good news: Geologists have decided that Earth is finally old enough to get its first lithosphere piercing!

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Discussion

Woah, new comic just barely as I refreshed? I must be so cool! Willintendo (talk) 20:43, 22 September 2025 (UTC)

Being "old enough" doesn't mean much, I'm afraid. I saw a very young child in a puschair (not sure what age... probably pre-verbal, though she responded to my friendly waggly-wave of fingers with a close enough gesture in return) with a flashy ear-piercing stud the other day, which was probably her mother's choice to impose upon her. (Not quite FGM/circumcision level of parental imposition, but certainly not consensual.) 92.17.62.87 20:44, 22 September 2025 (UTC)

There are some cultures that traditionally pierce the ears within a few days of birth, on the theory that it's more painful when they're older. The American Association of Pediatrics doesn't have a problem with this as long as it's done safely. In the US, I think it's more common to wait until they're at least 12 years old and make the decision themselves. That's probably what Randall is thinking of. Barmar (talk) 20:57, 22 September 2025 (UTC)

Part of that is because earlobes can grow unevenly, placing an early piercing in a weird spot. By the teenage years, this is less likely to happen. 50.52.119.169 22:03, 22 September 2025 (UTC)

Is there a new long distance boring project that has happened or is being planned that this comic is in reference to? I was hoping there would be some mention on this page? I can't find any likely candidates in a quick Google search. Any ideas? 38.175.130.234 22:34, 22 September 2025 (UTC)

The piercing is going rather deep into hot stuff, according to the image (do we have estimates?). Being "old enough" might be implying that enough time has passed for the hot stuff to cool down so that it can finally be safely pierced (do we have estimates?). --88.113.67.59 05:33, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

By my guesstimate, the entry and exit points are about 700 km (435 mi for imperialists) apart and the ring diameter is twice of that. The section of the ring that is subterran could be 10% of the ring's diameter, so it's 140 km or 87 mi and the ring extends into space by about 1260km, smashing nicely all satellites that don't have a near-equatorial orbit. Maybe we could integrate a space elevator into it? Although I doubt that Gospodin P. will allow that project, because it would totally smash their Kola Superdeep record. But I think the Russians are safe for now, either our tech or Earth will have to mature a bit more until we can successfully drill into the mantle 195.49.224.20 08:07, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

Here's a diagram to estimate it. Randall's earth surface isn't very circular unfortunately, so I flipped the image to make it symmetric and took the largest extent. I get a depth of 10% of the earth's radius, so 637km/396mi, and distance between entry and exit spans about 26 degrees of the earth's circumference, so about 2900km/1800mi. Mtcv (talk) 08:41, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

That seems within measurement error of the length of the Alameda-Weehawken Burrito Tunnel, which is a similar long-distance lithospheric piercing.107.128.213.247 08:59, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

Thanks. At 600 km depth, according to [2] it should be nearly 2000 °C, so gold and silver rings are out of question, but if Daddy pays, why not have diamond rings, or hafnium carbonitride. Besides temperature, the piercing will face pressure and stress, but hey, if Earth is old enough, it should have grown out of such things. --130.233.188.240 09:35, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune all have rings - why shouldn't we? 82.13.184.33 08:16, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

The outer planets' rings aren't piercings -- they're hula hoops. --208.59.176.206 14:03, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

SO unfair!!! I hate you!!! 82.13.184.33 15:01, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

It will build character. You will understand when you are older. --88.113.67.59 15:26, 23 September 2025 (UTC)

I thought the lava mentioned in the Title Text was more a metaphor for bleeding than for inflammation. Ianrbibtitlht (talk) 17:10, 24 September 2025 (UTC)

This most likely isn't relevant enough to include in the article, but this comic reminds me of the cover of the album Planet Punk by Die Ärzte. 2001:9E8:6B7E:5E00:D53A:16A:E795:817 19:18, 24 September 2025 (UTC)

Who was prohibiting Earth from getting one? Not like it’d listen to the scientists finding ways to destroy it for its benefit, though.《プロキシ》(XKCD中毒者) 13:04, 25 September 2025 (UTC)

Is it a coincidence that the ring pierced at Australia looks like a pacifier? I mean, talking about age and all... --88.113.67.59 13:18, 25 September 2025 (UTC)

My thoughts on the choice of Australia was a hidden cheeky dirty joke... The world got pierced 'down under'. 2601:740:8680:3650:D0C1:206C:10EE:9913
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