3313: Fusion Device

Fusion Device

|< < Prev #3313 (October 19, 2026)

Title text: I don't see why people have trouble doing this at room temperature. Using hot rivets would honestly have been MORE work.

|< < Prev Random explanation

Explanation

This is one of 52 incomplete explanations: This page was fused together at room temperature. Don't remove this notice too soon. You can help by editing the explanation!

Nuclear fusion is a process in which lighter nuclei of atoms fuse into a heavier one. Because both nuclei are positively charged, overcoming their mutual repulsion and bringing them together requires colliding them at high speed. This can be done directly with particle accelerators, but if the goal is to do the process on a scale that allows net energy release, accelerators aren't a workable solution because they require a great deal of energy input. Another approach is to bring the nuclei to a very high temperature, so they're moving randomly at high speeds, and will occasionally collide in such a way as to fuse. The process is usually performed at very high temperatures (tens to hundreds of millions of degrees Celsius). Ponytail is extremely surprised at Cueball and Megan's claim that they have built a working cold fusion machine, which would create such reactions at room temperature, and even more so that it was "easy", because this is a long-hypothesised technology that has remained stubbornly unachievable. Had they actually managed to do this, it would certainly put them in contention for the Nobel prize they are expecting.

It turns out that they have mistaken an atomic diagram of a deuterium–tritium fusion for a physical picture of a machine used to create such a reaction, replacing the particles involved with fasteners that have a similar appearance to the depictions in the diagram. They have interpreted protons, illustrated by a circle with a +, as Phillips head screws; electrons, marked with a -, as flat head screws; and neutrons, denoted by an empty circle, as rivets. They seem not to have wondered how a box of screws could create cold fusion, or why no-one else has done it before if it's that simple, and still believe that they deserve the Nobel Prize for it. Nor do they notice Ponytail's repeated disdain for their attempts, ignoring it entirely.

Whereas high temperatures are (so far) essential for fusion technology, when working with screws and hardware, higher temperatures threaten the structural integrity of the metal the fixings are made of. The materials these fasteners are usually used with may also be damaged by high temperatures (for example, wood risks catching fire). The title text plays off this as a continuation of Cueball and Megan's mistake, having one of them point out that hot rivets/screws would make construction of their 'device' far more difficult than doing it at room temperature.

Transcript

This is one of 35 incomplete transcripts: Don't remove this notice too soon. You can help by editing the transcript!

[Megan and Cueball are walking towards Ponytail, sitting at a desk. Megan is holding a rolled up sheet of paper, and Cueball is holding a box.]

Cueball: We built the room-temperature fusion device you wanted.

Ponytail: You what??

[Megan is displaying the sheet of paper to Ponytail, while Cueball is showing the box.]

Megan: Yeah, we looked it up on a diagram, and it was really easy. We were able to build it with parts we had around the shop.

Ponytail: "Easy?"

[A focus on Megan and Cueball, with Ponytail off-panel. Megan is holding up the paper. On it you can see a diagram of various protons, neutrons and electrons clustered in groups on it. Cueball is displaying the box, which has various protrusions on its surface.]

Megan: It was just six Phillips head screws, six flat-head screws, and nine rivets.

Ponytail [off-panel]: *Sigh*

Cueball: So do they mail us a Nobel Prize, or do we have to go pick it up?

  Add comment 

Discussion

First?Velocifyer (talk) 13:08, 19 October 2026 (UTC)

Yes, they would be. 86.22.132.121 13:39, 19 October 2026 (UTC)

Looks like they’re screwed. 192.64.64.114 13:14, 19 October 2026 (UTC)

Nah, just screwy. Nuts, even. But their subject is riveting. 2605:59C8:160:DB08:2D80:EC68:6BE0:28E3 14:05, 19 October 2026 (UTC)

Idk how to format and write a proper explanation but the joke is that room-temperature fusion isn’t actually known to be possible (IRL), and they (Cueball and Megan?) misinterpreted the symbols denoting the subatomic particles (plus sign for positive proton, minus sign for negative electron, no sign for neutral neutron) as slots for screw types (cross-shaped Phillips head, line-shaped flathead, rivet that doesn’t use a slot in its head) because they have the same corresponding appearances when they’re just circles, so they literally built the diagram at room-temperature that represents fusion using those fasteners instead of making an actual room-temperature fusion device and thought that was it (thus the surprise that something impossible seemed so "easy"). Then they ask about a Nobel Prize, because they think they actually made room-temperature fusion. The title text is a joke on how making a "room-temperature fusion device" that’s actually a diagram like that would be harder if you used hot metal fasteners (which burn, melt, and deform), playing on how actual "hot" fusion happens at millions of degrees Kelvin. The woman at the desk (presumably some researcher) was very surprised by their claim because she knows deliberate room-temperature fusion isn’t known to be possible, but she immediately realizes their misunderstanding and is let down (hence the sigh). 2601:182:300:D6A0:B5B8:EEF0:9CF0:AC6D 13:22, 19 October 2026 (UTC)

I accidentally broke the transcript and I have no idea how. How do I fix it? GSLikesCats306 (talk) 13:46, 19 October 2026 (UTC)
        Add comment