672: Suggestions

Explain xkcd: It's 'cause you're dumb.
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Title text: An hour later: SUGGESTION: LICK HER NIPPLE MORE.


Social networking site Facebook routinely suggests reconnecting with Facebook friends whom you haven't interacted with on the website for a while. This is taken to its logical extreme in this comic when that Facebook feature repeatedly, in an increasingly voyeuristic fashion, tries to get Cueball to hook up with his occasional friend-with-benefits Susie, despite the fact that Cueball knows she's falling for him and doesn't want to lead her on.

According to the title text, Cueball and Susie do end up hooking up, even against Cueball's better judgement, as so often happens between people who're physically attracted to one another. And he apparently left the webcam on as well, because the Facebook feature is now giving suggestions on what Cueball should do to her, mid-coitus. Obviously, this is not something that Facebook, a social networking site, can do... Yet.[citation needed]


[Cueball is sitting at his computer. Facebook sidebar messages appear on the top of each panel, with a user photo of Susie (looking like Megan leaning forward so her hair hangs down the sides of her face) and a few lines of text.]
Facebook: Susie
Reconnect with her
[Phone icon] Send her a text
Cueball: Come on, Facebook. I know I shouldn't.
Facebook: Susie
She'd come over
[Bed icon] You don't have to fall asleep alone.
Cueball: It's been so hard to stop. But she's falling for me, and I can't keep getting her hopes up like this.
Facebook: Susie
Life is complicated
[Icon of stick figures embracing] She's so warm against you. You both want it.
Cueball: (pulling out phone) Maybe if I just make it clear it's not going to be a thing...
Cueball: Yeah, we'll just have a talk.
Facebook: Susie
Oh yeah. Mmm...
[Webcam icon] Leave your webcam on so I can watch.
Cueball: Okay, this feature is getting creepier and creepier.

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What is the icon in the third panel supposed to be? --NeatNit (talk) 13:40, 26 June 2014 (UTC)

Two people being warm against each other. --BD (talk) 01:14, 20 November 2014 (UTC)
So we have a multi millionaire with no life, no respect for anyone's privacy and no moral scruples that has been running this make-believe world since he was a pimply kid and offering the full Monty to any would be Faust.
HTF did we let that happen? :~D
Oh yes, sexual persuasion. Why do I get the impression this is all going to end badly for everyone involved?

I used Google News BEFORE it was clickbait (talk) 00:09, 28 January 2015 (UTC)

How is Susie "drawn as a sexy version of Megan"? That seems to be a bit of a reach to me. (talk) (please sign your comments with ~~~~)

On the other side: How can you tell she isn't ;-) 14:29, 12 June 2019 (UTC)
It is objectively false that she is a sexy version of anything. She is a stick figure. I also don't think it makes any sense to call anyone Megan in any xkcd strip unless they are called Megan in that specific strip. Xkcd seldom has continuity of any kind, and imputing it to characters is goofy.
If I believed that this wiki should be a source of ultimate truth, I would have removed the line about sexy Megan. Since I think this wiki is a fun collaborative writing project in its own right, I added a citation needed tag to this assertion, because it is funnier that way. If you remove it, or the thing about being sexy Megan, your mom's a ho. 23:58, 24 July 2020 (UTC)
I removed it and think you should have learned the joke before you used it. This community gives real (but sarcastic) explanations on the comic. The "citation needed" joke should be used on things that are universally understood to be true, and should not normally need a citation. The concept of a sexy stick figure isn't that... all I see is more random words which isn't funny except to a mind where random is funny, to whom I direct to xkcd:1210 16:22, 1 July 2021 (UTC)

Why does the explanation say that Cueball left his webcam on? He explicitly said that the action was creepy. 21:09, 7 December 2022 (UTC)

Because the title text read literal suggests he did, I assume. —While False (museum | talk | contributions | logs | rights | printable version | page information | what links there | related changes | Google search | current time: 00:58) 07:11, 8 December 2022 (UTC)